{"type":"rich","version":"1.0","provider_name":"Transistor","provider_url":"https://transistor.fm","author_name":"The Dialog","title":"1.6 / Are your relationships transactional or transformational?","html":"","width":"100%","height":180,"duration":3164,"description":"Erwin McManus has a strategy for board games: give everybody whatever they ask for. By his telling, he wins every time, and now his friends warn each other not to take anything from him.\nThat's the difference between a transactional relationship and a transformational one. Transactional people treat relationships as a cost. Transformational people treat them as an investment. My co-host Nick Surface and I bring it home to marriage, friendship and work.\nHow do you know you're being transactional?\nWatch your first question. If it's \"how does this serve me?\", that's the tell. So is keeping score in your marriage, and so is trying to win the argument.\nShould you cut toxic people out of your life?\nSome people do need to go. But before you start cutting people, ask the harder question: what if you're the one demanding all the energy?\nWho taught you to think the way you think?\nThe Greek word for sin is ἁμαρτία (hamartía). It means to miss the mark. Aristotle used it for the decision that sets a character on the road to ruin. We're modeling creatures, and until you see a behavior as learned, you can't change it.\nHow do you get a raise?\nDo more than you're asked to do, for a sustained period of time. The law of sowing and reaping says you sow first.\nWhat is the purpose of relationships?\nGod gave us His word, His Spirit and other people, and He said it is not good for man to be alone (Genesis 2:18). Andy Stanley says my job is not to fill another person's cup, my job is to pour my cup out.\nScriptures\nExodus 20:5 · Proverbs 18:24 · Matthew 10:8 · John 5:19 · Genesis 2:18 · Luke 6:38\nThinkers\nAristotle, Poetics · Erwin McManus · Zig Ziglar · Brian Tracy · Andy Stanley · Rick Warren\nChapters\n0:00 Cold open and show intro\n0:52 People as a cost or an investment\n1:41 Mass layoffs and the shareholder economy\n3:08 What it costs vs. what it creates\n5:29 What's the mission of your friendships?\n7:29 Transactional vs. transformational: can the pie grow?\n9:00 Is your marriage a...","thumbnail_url":"https://img.transistorcdn.com/7YsfA4gq5VzjhvmKvDET1pQqT0OM6yxv1laklKclR7g/rs:fill:0:0:1/w:400/h:400/q:60/mb:500000/aHR0cHM6Ly9pbWct/dXBsb2FkLXByb2R1/Y3Rpb24udHJhbnNp/c3Rvci5mbS83ZWZh/MTRmZDEzOWRjZGQz/Y2M2NThkNzYwOTJj/ODA4MC5qcGc.webp","thumbnail_width":300,"thumbnail_height":300}