{"type":"rich","version":"1.0","provider_name":"Transistor","provider_url":"https://transistor.fm","author_name":"Plain Talk Matters","title":"Ep1 The Alarm Next Door","html":"","width":"100%","height":180,"duration":835,"description":"The Alarm Next Door — Show NotesEpisode summaryA snooze alarm through a hotel wall. Roughly every ten minutes, on holiday, surrounded by friends half my age. By any reasonable measure, a small thing. So why was I lying there rigid with a fifty-year-old feeling?In this episode I read my essay The Alarm Next Door and follow a single morning's irritation all the way down — past the woman next door, past my father, past my mother, to a wound older than any of them. It's a piece about the job I was handed before I was old enough to refuse it, about the difference between an explosion I'd never have and the silent resentment I always carry, and about the third door most of us are never shown: that you can feel a trigger fully, do the work on where it comes from, and still make a clean, loving request for what you need.Spoiler: I did make the request. It came out clumsier than the version in my head. I'm leaving that in.What this episode is aboutWhy the size of a feeling tells you the size of the wound, not the size of the offence\"When it's hysterical, it's often historical\" — and how to use that as a working tool, not a sloganThe job some of us were given as children: be the considerate one, be the antidote to a careless parentGenerational trauma as a parcel passed hand to hand — and what it takes to set it downHow the same trigger can quietly govern the relationships we most want to protect (in my case, with my daughters)Nonviolent Communication in real life, imperfect and out loud, versus the tidy script in your headWhy silence is not peace, and why speaking up — even badly — beats harbouring it all dayLines worth sitting with\"The alarm wasn't the problem. The alarm was the invitation.\"\"The size of the feeling is the size of the wound — not the size of the offence.\"\"Generational trauma, in a nutshell. Not a curse, not a life sentence. A parcel, passed hand to hand down the years, until someone finally turns it over and decides not to pass it on.\"\"Silence would not...","thumbnail_url":"https://img.transistorcdn.com/Kd9YpwJdICsaaTWOMAmQHg3GgknwlpOxuSVV6jIVeQk/rs:fill:0:0:1/w:400/h:400/q:60/mb:500000/aHR0cHM6Ly9pbWct/dXBsb2FkLXByb2R1/Y3Rpb24udHJhbnNp/c3Rvci5mbS8zZWZk/MDlkMzE2YjM5M2Nk/MzQzZWZkY2E1MDYz/M2Q3MS5wbmc.webp","thumbnail_width":300,"thumbnail_height":300}