{"type":"rich","version":"1.0","provider_name":"Transistor","provider_url":"https://transistor.fm","author_name":"Notes to Her","title":"Note 80: You Teach People How to Love You by How You Love Yourself","html":"","width":"100%","height":180,"duration":918,"description":"Have you ever told a friend you would never put up with what she puts up with, and then canceled on yourself for the fourth time that week? In Note 80, I talk about why the people around you follow your lead, and why the way you treat yourself is the first lesson anyone gets about how to treat you.\n\nWe get into where the habit of putting yourself last comes from, what the quiet tally of over-giving does to a relationship, and who owns what when someone treats you badly. I also give you three small moves to try this week, and they are small on purpose.\n\nIn this episode, you’ll learn:\nWhy people read how you treat yourself before they hear what you ask for\nWhere the habit of putting yourself last comes from\nWhat the pattern costs you in love, friendship, and family\nWho owns what when someone treats you poorly\nThree small moves to start changing how people respond to you\nIf you have ever said “I don’t mind” when you did mind, this Note is for you. If you want help changing the pattern one-on-one, you can learn about The Confidently Her Method, my 16-week private coaching program, at https://theconfidentlyher.com/her-method","thumbnail_url":"https://img.transistorcdn.com/YSmE1jM0mc5E6hI6jBHRbXBHfMjyueQjBn7vCt4gttA/rs:fill:0:0:1/w:400/h:400/q:60/mb:500000/aHR0cHM6Ly9pbWct/dXBsb2FkLXByb2R1/Y3Rpb24udHJhbnNp/c3Rvci5mbS8wYTNl/MzFjYzRjZGYyMDE0/NjkxNDgxZjJlOWFi/ZDhjYy5wbmc.webp","thumbnail_width":300,"thumbnail_height":300}