{"type":"rich","version":"1.0","provider_name":"Transistor","provider_url":"https://transistor.fm","author_name":"You Can Mentor: A Christian Youth Mentoring Podcast","title":"224. Giving Gifts // Mentoring Minute","html":"","width":"100%","height":180,"duration":410,"description":"Giving Gifts\n\nGiving gifts or purchasing things for your mentee is one of the more complicated topics you will face as a mentor. You want to be able to show your care and affection for your mentee through giving gifts, but so often they can become distractions in your mentoring relationship. \n\nLet me be the first to say that this is a gray topic. It is not black and white. We are just giving you our perspective that we gained through years of mentoring. \n\nWe never want our mentee or their family to:\nSee us as an ATM\nTo hang out with us to get something\nConfuse our mentee when we don’t give them everything they want\n\nThis is especially difficult when the gifts you want to purchase are considered necessary items. \n\nWe have had mentees who:\nNeeded new shoes\nNeeded a bed\nNeeded groceries\n\nWhen needs like this pop up, we suggest you use your connections to a non-profit organization or a church to partner with your mentee to take care of those needs. We highly recommend building a relationship with other ancillary organizations such as food banks, clothing closets, and churches. \n\nIf you want to provide basic items, we’re ok with that, as long as the mentee and their family know it’s coming from someone other than you. This is a benefit to mentoring with a specific organization - they can be the fall guy when someone asks you for a gift. You can blame it on them. \n\nBut there is a difference between a want and a need. \n\nWe recommend that you do not purchase your mentee anything with the exception of a birthday present. We recommend that you place a $25 cap on the birthday gift that you purchase. An occasional purchasing of food and treats is another thing. Perhaps you want to take your mentee to a game or movie. Those are ok as long as you follow the rule of three and you make sure it doesn’t turn into something the mentee expects. \n\nYour presence is enough. Obviously this is assuming basic needs are being provided, the best gift you can give your mentee is love and...","thumbnail_url":"https://img.transistorcdn.com/1Xka3zDiBlBt17bxGFKaPNKtfL4x0Qw6Yce8LqvHcjw/rs:fill:0:0:1/w:400/h:400/q:60/mb:500000/aHR0cHM6Ly9pbWct/dXBsb2FkLXByb2R1/Y3Rpb24udHJhbnNp/c3Rvci5mbS8wMTU4/YTYzZjc5Y2M5NjY4/MTFkZmY0NjExMzM2/Njc1MC5qcGVn.webp","thumbnail_width":300,"thumbnail_height":300}