Why do so many men wait until they’re at breaking point before asking for help?
This week on Minds of Men, I’m joined by counsellor James Yates for an open and honest conversation about men, mental health and counselling, and why having somewhere to talk without judgement can be so important.
James is a UK-based psychotherapist who works primarily with high-functioning men whose ways of handling emotional experience have begun to break down. His work draws on the person-centred, psychodynamic, and somatic traditions, with a particular interest in how men come to process feeling rather than simply discharging it. He also trains Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, a discipline that has shaped how he views presence, pressure, and contact within the therapeutic relationship.
We explore some of the reasons men walk through the counselling room door, from relationships, anger and anxiety to identity, loneliness, pressure and simply feeling lost. We also discuss the barriers that can prevent men from reaching out in the first place - the expectation to cope, provide, stay strong and figure things out alone.
James and I take you inside the counselling room and talk about what therapy actually looks like. What happens when you don’t know what to say? Do you need to be struggling with your mental health to see a counsellor? And does talking about your problems really make a difference?
We also explore masculinity, vulnerability, emotional awareness and why counselling isn't necessarily about "fixing" someone, sometimes it's about finally having the space to understand yourself.
Whether you've considered counselling yourself, you're worried about a man in your life, or you're simply curious about what really happens behind the closed doors of the therapy room, this episode is for you.
You can learn more about James and his work here:
- https://www.jamessyates.com/