1 00:00:00,170 --> 00:00:02,702 Hello, I'm Isabelle. She her. 2 00:00:02,756 --> 00:00:05,182 Hers. And I'm David. He him 3 00:00:05,236 --> 00:00:08,074 his. And we're two therapists with ADHD 4 00:00:08,122 --> 00:00:10,794 who sit down to have some chats about ADHD. 5 00:00:10,922 --> 00:00:13,614 We can't promise we'll stay on topic or be 6 00:00:13,652 --> 00:00:16,606 professional or even remotely mature, but 7 00:00:16,628 --> 00:00:19,406 we can promise that you'll end up looking at you or your 8 00:00:19,428 --> 00:00:21,914 loved one's beautiful neurodivergent 9 00:00:21,962 --> 00:00:24,686 brain in a shiny new way. This is not a 10 00:00:24,708 --> 00:00:27,138 therapy session. This is something 11 00:00:27,256 --> 00:00:28,270 Shiny! 12 00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:29,394 I love it. 13 00:00:29,464 --> 00:00:30,658 Do you like it? 14 00:00:30,856 --> 00:00:33,650 That's amazing. And can this just be the 15 00:00:33,672 --> 00:00:36,562 intro? You saying that and me freaking out about how amazing it is? 16 00:00:36,648 --> 00:00:39,538 Yeah, that 17 00:00:39,576 --> 00:00:41,124 could be our first intro. 18 00:00:43,034 --> 00:00:45,942 So without further ado, welcome to Something 19 00:00:46,028 --> 00:00:46,802 Shiny. 20 00:00:46,898 --> 00:00:48,054 I'm David. 21 00:00:56,814 --> 00:00:59,578 In this episode, David and I 22 00:00:59,696 --> 00:01:02,550 debrief what it was like to attend 23 00:01:02,742 --> 00:01:05,058 the Young Leaders Organizing 24 00:01:05,126 --> 00:01:07,418 Institute of Eye to Eye. 25 00:01:07,546 --> 00:01:10,284 What does that all mean? First off, check out the show notes. 26 00:01:10,284 --> 00:01:13,268 for all the good links and for more info. But 27 00:01:13,306 --> 00:01:15,938 in a nutshell, you maybe remember David 28 00:01:15,986 --> 00:01:18,854 mentioning this organization on and off. It is 29 00:01:18,924 --> 00:01:21,094 a deep part of his origin 30 00:01:21,244 --> 00:01:24,176 story. so big recommend going back 31 00:01:24,230 --> 00:01:26,914 to his, origin story episode. 32 00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:30,030 But in a nutshell, Eye to Eye is a national 33 00:01:30,142 --> 00:01:32,466 organization. It's been around 20 plus 34 00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:35,058 years, and its mission is to 35 00:01:35,096 --> 00:01:38,046 improve the lives of neurodiverse young 36 00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:40,694 people. And it engages 37 00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:43,974 neurodiverse young people and 38 00:01:44,124 --> 00:01:47,030 their allies, literally forming a movement to 39 00:01:47,052 --> 00:01:49,894 make a more equitable and inclusive society. 40 00:01:50,234 --> 00:01:53,206 And the oi. As it's dubbed 41 00:01:53,270 --> 00:01:56,080 the Organizing Institute. it brings 42 00:01:56,112 --> 00:01:58,368 together these student leaders. 43 00:01:58,496 --> 00:02:00,708 From all of Idai's programs so that. 44 00:02:00,746 --> 00:02:03,368 They can learn, train, connect, and 45 00:02:03,406 --> 00:02:06,248 get ramped up for the new school year. This 46 00:02:06,286 --> 00:02:08,968 is the first in what we're so 47 00:02:09,006 --> 00:02:11,924 excited to share, a big series. 48 00:02:12,004 --> 00:02:13,704 Of incredible, 49 00:02:14,264 --> 00:02:16,338 recordings that all kind. 50 00:02:16,376 --> 00:02:18,738 Of connect somehow to this 51 00:02:18,856 --> 00:02:21,124 conference and our experience 52 00:02:21,574 --> 00:02:23,630 with neurodivergent 53 00:02:23,742 --> 00:02:26,690 culture. So excited to share this episode with 54 00:02:26,712 --> 00:02:29,458 you and stay tuned for more. And of course, 55 00:02:29,496 --> 00:02:32,470 before we go there, well, we'll hit 56 00:02:32,492 --> 00:02:34,774 up some super fun tangents. 57 00:02:35,354 --> 00:02:37,894 That's how we roll. That's how we roll. 58 00:02:38,474 --> 00:02:41,178 We got to be under sometimes, so, 59 00:02:41,296 --> 00:02:42,554 full disclosure, 60 00:02:44,094 --> 00:02:47,066 I have been on my Adderall now, 61 00:02:47,120 --> 00:02:49,898 my extended release Adderall, for, like, a month or 62 00:02:49,936 --> 00:02:51,642 two, and it's, like, 63 00:02:51,808 --> 00:02:54,294 noticeable. And then my, 64 00:02:54,244 --> 00:02:57,166 prescriber because I would 65 00:02:57,220 --> 00:03:00,110 kind of crash at the end of the day, and I felt like I 66 00:03:00,132 --> 00:03:03,006 was really the two times 67 00:03:03,060 --> 00:03:06,034 I most needed are mornings and then, like, bedtime, 68 00:03:06,454 --> 00:03:09,262 essentially, where there's lots of moving parts 69 00:03:09,278 --> 00:03:11,794 and transitions or, like, pickup from school 70 00:03:11,864 --> 00:03:14,722 on. But I also 71 00:03:14,888 --> 00:03:17,730 do benefit from it at work. I benefit from it 72 00:03:17,752 --> 00:03:20,710 everywhere. It's pretty obvious now that I've been on it a while how much I 73 00:03:20,732 --> 00:03:23,224 benefit from it. So I just started taking, 74 00:03:23,764 --> 00:03:26,304 the extended release, and then I do a second 75 00:03:26,454 --> 00:03:28,064 immediate release dose, 76 00:03:29,284 --> 00:03:30,204 like, midday. 77 00:03:30,284 --> 00:03:30,760 A booster. 78 00:03:30,812 --> 00:03:33,428 A booster. And it's so cool. And I 79 00:03:33,466 --> 00:03:35,334 totally forgot it today 80 00:03:38,904 --> 00:03:41,648 just because life happened, right? Because we're adjusting 81 00:03:41,696 --> 00:03:44,464 to, our kid being in kindergarten and 82 00:03:44,614 --> 00:03:47,568 pickups are different. Timing of everything is different. But our other 83 00:03:47,606 --> 00:03:50,434 kid is not starting their school yet. It's a whole thing. 84 00:03:51,764 --> 00:03:54,636 It feels like the puberty of our schedule time 85 00:03:54,710 --> 00:03:57,216 right now. This is puberty. We're going through schedule 86 00:03:57,280 --> 00:03:59,414 puberty. And I just want 87 00:03:59,944 --> 00:04:02,708 the discomfort to be done 88 00:04:02,746 --> 00:04:05,700 with. And I want the beautiful butterfly of us on 89 00:04:05,722 --> 00:04:08,648 the other side of knowing our schedule to 90 00:04:08,686 --> 00:04:11,320 be done. But that would happen till the end of the month. But 91 00:04:11,342 --> 00:04:14,088 anyway, I say all this to say 92 00:04:14,286 --> 00:04:17,144 I realized two things. One is that 93 00:04:17,214 --> 00:04:19,704 I am extremely 94 00:04:19,784 --> 00:04:22,732 sensitive to textures that I 95 00:04:22,738 --> 00:04:25,356 didn't even realize that on Adderall. I was 96 00:04:25,490 --> 00:04:27,736 not noticing clothing 97 00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:30,668 or sensations as 98 00:04:30,706 --> 00:04:33,696 much. Does that make any sense at all? Am I 99 00:04:33,750 --> 00:04:36,194 crazy? M. It's real. 100 00:04:37,204 --> 00:04:39,648 This whole afternoon, I mean, it was so 101 00:04:39,686 --> 00:04:42,608 itchy, but I wanted to 102 00:04:42,806 --> 00:04:45,780 I've never felt so uncomfortable. It was like the 103 00:04:45,802 --> 00:04:47,844 sensation just felt amplified. 104 00:04:48,744 --> 00:04:50,934 It's almost as if you didn't have, 105 00:04:52,314 --> 00:04:55,230 an accommodation to avoid distraction and you were noticing 106 00:04:55,262 --> 00:04:58,118 how many physical distractions you were just kind of pushing through, 107 00:04:58,236 --> 00:05:01,090 which is like a total narrative for the ADHD 108 00:05:01,122 --> 00:05:01,666 population. 109 00:05:01,730 --> 00:05:02,584 Okay, cool. 110 00:05:04,394 --> 00:05:07,270 Because I'm feeling it even now, right? Like, you see 111 00:05:07,292 --> 00:05:10,170 me and I'm like itching, and I'm uncomfortable, and I 112 00:05:10,192 --> 00:05:12,844 just want this temperature, and it's like 113 00:05:13,694 --> 00:05:16,166 I'm so distracted by my physical 114 00:05:16,230 --> 00:05:18,954 sensations. I'm not used to this feeling. 115 00:05:19,374 --> 00:05:22,250 Oh, it's so real. And I think there have to be the 116 00:05:22,272 --> 00:05:25,230 right variables to bring that out. It was just a few 117 00:05:25,252 --> 00:05:27,978 weeks ago. It was, like, ridiculously hot and stupid 118 00:05:28,026 --> 00:05:30,366 humid. I mean, like, 87% 119 00:05:30,420 --> 00:05:33,230 humidity. The moment where the real feel is, 120 00:05:33,252 --> 00:05:36,082 like, 20 degrees above where it actually is. 121 00:05:36,248 --> 00:05:39,230 I went into kicked open the door 122 00:05:39,262 --> 00:05:41,954 of my house, and I was just m. 123 00:05:42,774 --> 00:05:44,290 I'm not wearing a shirt and. 124 00:05:44,312 --> 00:05:45,406 I'm not wearing pants. 125 00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:48,146 And I went to the bedroom and came back with 126 00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:51,238 basketball shorts, and that was it. And there was nothing I was 127 00:05:51,276 --> 00:05:54,182 not going to change for the life of me that day. And 128 00:05:54,348 --> 00:05:56,614 I didn't want to sit on certain fabrics 129 00:05:57,594 --> 00:06:00,582 because it was like it's breathing on me. I don't want something that's going 130 00:06:00,588 --> 00:06:03,482 to breathe back, and I don't want to feel like I have 131 00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:06,458 to peel myself off it when I finish. Why can't something just 132 00:06:06,496 --> 00:06:09,450 have an agreement to be there and hold me, and I 133 00:06:09,472 --> 00:06:12,158 hold it. We leave each other, same as we found each 134 00:06:12,196 --> 00:06:12,784 other. 135 00:06:15,394 --> 00:06:16,144 Yes. 136 00:06:18,594 --> 00:06:21,438 Why can't there be a leave no trace policy 137 00:06:21,556 --> 00:06:24,258 with my thighs and my 138 00:06:24,296 --> 00:06:26,914 lower back as I sit in this chair? 139 00:06:27,884 --> 00:06:30,360 I'm just sitting on your chair. Why do you got 140 00:06:30,382 --> 00:06:33,368 to snap my layer of 141 00:06:33,406 --> 00:06:35,034 skin off? No. 142 00:06:35,514 --> 00:06:38,258 and then there was the other chairs that whisper 143 00:06:38,306 --> 00:06:41,002 inappropriate things to everyone else. And what I mean by that is 144 00:06:41,088 --> 00:06:43,930 you sit down on the chair, you get up, and your butt is in 145 00:06:43,952 --> 00:06:46,598 that chair. All the fibers are going in the one Direction. 146 00:06:46,646 --> 00:06:47,498 Your butt was in it. 147 00:06:47,536 --> 00:06:50,430 And you would see my butt and it's like I'm used 148 00:06:50,452 --> 00:06:53,390 to. Now I get up and wipe the seat. As I get 149 00:06:53,412 --> 00:06:56,190 up, I've shaken the Etcher Sketch like 150 00:06:56,292 --> 00:06:57,854 no one's looking at my bum. 151 00:06:59,714 --> 00:07:00,174 No. 152 00:07:00,244 --> 00:07:03,038 Couch. You can't fool 153 00:07:03,086 --> 00:07:05,794 me again. You can't fool me twice. Couch. 154 00:07:06,694 --> 00:07:09,106 Not twice, maybe 155 00:07:09,160 --> 00:07:09,950 twice. 156 00:07:10,142 --> 00:07:13,112 Okay, I 157 00:07:13,118 --> 00:07:15,560 got to ask you because we're talking about textures, we're talking about medicine. 158 00:07:15,592 --> 00:07:18,236 And this is an important part of my week 159 00:07:18,370 --> 00:07:20,876 in our lives, is that we get to sit down and talk about this. 160 00:07:20,930 --> 00:07:23,420 But for a 161 00:07:23,442 --> 00:07:26,416 while we've been talking about going 162 00:07:26,470 --> 00:07:29,168 out, seeing what the culture looks like in different 163 00:07:29,206 --> 00:07:31,930 places What the culture feels like in different ways. 164 00:07:32,112 --> 00:07:34,886 By culture, by the way, you mean like neurodivergent 165 00:07:34,950 --> 00:07:35,638 culture? 166 00:07:35,766 --> 00:07:36,246 Culture? 167 00:07:36,310 --> 00:07:37,244 Oh, yeah. 168 00:07:37,694 --> 00:07:40,110 Like everything we talk about on something shiny is 169 00:07:40,132 --> 00:07:43,018 neurodivergent culture, if you think about it. M. It's 170 00:07:43,066 --> 00:07:45,982 things that we're all going to be like, oh my God, yes. 171 00:07:46,068 --> 00:07:48,810 I don't want to hear one person say, you won't be able to take a spell 172 00:07:48,842 --> 00:07:51,842 chucker with you, or all that kind of stuff. All those little 173 00:07:51,928 --> 00:07:53,524 things that make us all grown. 174 00:07:53,524 --> 00:07:56,218 Or like five more minutes. Grown like all these 175 00:07:56,256 --> 00:07:58,684 cultural little parts. And 176 00:07:59,214 --> 00:08:01,962 we went to go see this program, 177 00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:02,784 Eye to Eye. 178 00:08:02,784 --> 00:08:05,668 They have this thing called the Organizing Institute that they have once 179 00:08:05,706 --> 00:08:08,320 a year. And this organizing 180 00:08:08,352 --> 00:08:11,332 Institute they use to train their mentors that are going to 181 00:08:11,338 --> 00:08:13,944 go out and work with kids throughout the year. 182 00:08:14,014 --> 00:08:14,344 Right? 183 00:08:14,344 --> 00:08:14,374 HM. 184 00:08:14,926 --> 00:08:17,688 But they set up this program for 185 00:08:17,726 --> 00:08:20,440 these mentors with all the 186 00:08:20,462 --> 00:08:22,890 accommodations you could need, And no corrective 187 00:08:22,922 --> 00:08:25,124 behavior. And so 188 00:08:25,814 --> 00:08:28,738 you and I went to this conference I've been 189 00:08:28,776 --> 00:08:30,018 a number of times before, right? 190 00:08:30,056 --> 00:08:30,644 Yes. 191 00:08:31,974 --> 00:08:34,914 What was it like for you to come 192 00:08:34,984 --> 00:08:35,698 to? 193 00:08:35,896 --> 00:08:38,790 Oh my gosh. Okay, so first off, just 194 00:08:38,812 --> 00:08:41,330 to elaborate a little more because I'm 195 00:08:41,362 --> 00:08:44,262 imagining even just to help remind myself. 196 00:08:44,348 --> 00:08:47,190 So the part we, or at 197 00:08:47,212 --> 00:08:50,058 least I was able to be connected to was 198 00:08:50,096 --> 00:08:52,342 the part that then invited former 199 00:08:52,438 --> 00:08:54,758 mentors and allies 200 00:08:54,886 --> 00:08:57,804 and everyone kind of connected to 201 00:08:58,174 --> 00:09:01,030 the mission of the organization. 202 00:09:01,142 --> 00:09:03,084 Right. Like coming in and, 203 00:09:04,434 --> 00:09:07,070 getting even extra training on top of the 204 00:09:07,092 --> 00:09:09,764 mentors and stuff that were doing it. And 205 00:09:10,294 --> 00:09:13,284 I mean, it was just like the weirdest thing. First off, 206 00:09:14,214 --> 00:09:17,110 literally, this was the first thing walking and 207 00:09:17,132 --> 00:09:19,750 it was held in the beautiful University of 208 00:09:19,772 --> 00:09:22,678 Denver campus. It was so gorgeous. But it was just 209 00:09:22,716 --> 00:09:25,286 in this one huge building. But 210 00:09:25,340 --> 00:09:28,246 walking in there was a giant sign 211 00:09:28,300 --> 00:09:31,238 with arrows saying where to go. And then you walk 212 00:09:31,276 --> 00:09:34,170 in and there's another sign with arrows saying where to go. And then you 213 00:09:34,192 --> 00:09:37,050 take like two more steps and there's another sign with arrows telling you where to 214 00:09:37,072 --> 00:09:39,866 go. And at every possible moment where you would 215 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:42,846 glance in some different direction, you would find 216 00:09:42,900 --> 00:09:45,104 more data about where you need to go. 217 00:09:46,024 --> 00:09:48,900 david and I mean, I walked in. I think the first thing 218 00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:51,848 I said is, this is the first time I've ever been to a 219 00:09:51,886 --> 00:09:54,728 conference and found my way. We're supposed to 220 00:09:54,766 --> 00:09:57,754 go the first time. What? 221 00:09:59,164 --> 00:10:01,736 It just made me realize I've been to so many 222 00:10:01,790 --> 00:10:04,616 conferences and I never go where I'm supposed 223 00:10:04,670 --> 00:10:07,036 to. I continually get lost. I'm always 224 00:10:07,090 --> 00:10:09,948 late. It's so confusing to me. I'm always like, 225 00:10:09,986 --> 00:10:12,940 why do they put the print on the doors in 226 00:10:12,962 --> 00:10:15,820 these tiny letters? Like, I don't know where anything 227 00:10:15,922 --> 00:10:18,468 is. so first off, that was 228 00:10:18,506 --> 00:10:21,128 huge. It just felt like someone thought of it, 229 00:10:21,166 --> 00:10:24,110 right? and then you walk in a 230 00:10:24,132 --> 00:10:26,778 room and I don't know how to explain it. It just kind of felt 231 00:10:26,826 --> 00:10:29,538 like everyone was already maybe not like 232 00:10:29,576 --> 00:10:32,084 close family, that, you know, a lot, but 233 00:10:32,454 --> 00:10:35,410 everyone kind of already felt like they were just like a 234 00:10:35,432 --> 00:10:37,124 friend in waiting or 235 00:10:37,974 --> 00:10:40,866 extended family, like cousins. I didn't know I had 236 00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:43,812 kind of vibe. it just sort of felt like that everyone's 237 00:10:43,892 --> 00:10:46,556 talking in line, people are making like 238 00:10:46,754 --> 00:10:49,672 it was just delightful. It was delightful. 239 00:10:49,752 --> 00:10:52,652 And it was so moving 240 00:10:52,802 --> 00:10:55,712 and emotional and everything. 241 00:10:55,862 --> 00:10:58,300 But anyway, that's just like so first impression, 242 00:10:58,396 --> 00:11:01,216 delight. And then of course, just overjoyed and 243 00:11:01,254 --> 00:11:03,936 over the moon to see you and Robin. And then 244 00:11:03,974 --> 00:11:05,682 also, just also the, 245 00:11:06,552 --> 00:11:09,352 had they had ample food and 246 00:11:09,422 --> 00:11:12,216 snacks. The snacks, everybody I 247 00:11:12,254 --> 00:11:15,144 cannot get over. I want to live that 248 00:11:15,198 --> 00:11:18,056 snack life all the time. Why don't I live that snack 249 00:11:18,104 --> 00:11:21,084 life all the time? Every single room, so many 250 00:11:21,138 --> 00:11:23,624 snacks. Sweet and savory varieties, 251 00:11:23,768 --> 00:11:26,588 varieties of drinks and gatorade. Like 252 00:11:26,690 --> 00:11:29,182 everywhere, everywhere you went, there was water. 253 00:11:29,952 --> 00:11:32,512 It was delightful. It was delightful. 254 00:11:33,412 --> 00:11:34,384 It was a moment. 255 00:11:34,438 --> 00:11:37,136 And I think one of the things about being in a place like this 256 00:11:37,174 --> 00:11:39,516 is your nervous system feels 257 00:11:39,564 --> 00:11:42,064 different because there are very different 258 00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:44,956 dances happening. For instance, 259 00:11:45,084 --> 00:11:48,080 I'm used to needing to find my room. I get there kind of 260 00:11:48,086 --> 00:11:51,040 early. I'm never sure if I'm going to find it. I'm walking kind of quick because I want to 261 00:11:51,046 --> 00:11:54,000 make sure I get to the right place and get there in time. And then when I get to the room, I 262 00:11:54,006 --> 00:11:56,536 got to calm down, I got to breathe, I got to stop 263 00:11:56,574 --> 00:11:59,448 sweating, let my heart rate slow down. Like, I got 264 00:11:59,470 --> 00:12:02,296 to feel better because I just rushed to find this right 265 00:12:02,334 --> 00:12:05,048 room versus this experience here where 266 00:12:05,230 --> 00:12:07,722 we just walked to the place we need to be. 267 00:12:08,092 --> 00:12:11,020 Where we need to be, exactly. Didn't have to 268 00:12:11,026 --> 00:12:14,012 get anxious of, where am I going to go? There was no nervous system 269 00:12:14,082 --> 00:12:15,792 spiking to try to get us there. 270 00:12:15,792 --> 00:12:18,542 And it's this place where we see 271 00:12:18,612 --> 00:12:21,406 not only like there are accommodations everywhere, this 272 00:12:21,444 --> 00:12:24,370 organization, I does a great job with accommodations and 273 00:12:24,456 --> 00:12:27,410 teaching kids to advocate. So we get to see both of 274 00:12:27,416 --> 00:12:30,354 it. And I think, I don't know if you notice it. But there was 275 00:12:30,408 --> 00:12:33,318 no shame around this group of people to pick up 276 00:12:33,340 --> 00:12:33,478 a. 277 00:12:33,500 --> 00:12:36,290 Fidget spinner or fold 278 00:12:36,466 --> 00:12:37,942 spinners everywhere, 279 00:12:39,082 --> 00:12:39,542 draw. 280 00:12:39,612 --> 00:12:42,278 Or doodle or make a friendship bracelet in the middle of a 281 00:12:42,300 --> 00:12:45,110 conversation. These were accommodations that were built 282 00:12:45,196 --> 00:12:48,088 everywhere. People didn't have to sit in nothingness. which I thought was just 283 00:12:48,110 --> 00:12:48,440 great. 284 00:12:48,526 --> 00:12:51,448 Yes. No, that's exactly right. The way 285 00:12:51,470 --> 00:12:54,136 you described it, that is the feeling. It's like the reason it 286 00:12:54,174 --> 00:12:56,956 mattered is that all the 287 00:12:56,994 --> 00:12:59,676 things that normally would be the thing 288 00:12:59,794 --> 00:13:01,982 I'm actually 289 00:13:02,512 --> 00:13:05,464 managing through with a ton of anxiety 290 00:13:05,528 --> 00:13:07,022 in my end, or, 291 00:13:09,172 --> 00:13:11,796 almost like forcing myself to not think about, like, 292 00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:14,676 legit. I think that's why I pointed those things out, right? Because 293 00:13:14,714 --> 00:13:17,492 you're so right. My heart rate, usually at a conference is 294 00:13:17,562 --> 00:13:20,164 extremely elevated. I am super 295 00:13:20,218 --> 00:13:22,996 anxious. I am absolutely ahead of 296 00:13:23,034 --> 00:13:25,512 time. And then still somehow running late. 297 00:13:25,932 --> 00:13:28,616 I'm getting into the room and I'm sitting down, and it's like 298 00:13:28,654 --> 00:13:31,384 halfway through the lecture or the presentation that my body 299 00:13:31,438 --> 00:13:34,376 is relatively calm. But as soon as I'm in the room, all 300 00:13:34,414 --> 00:13:37,022 I want is a snack. And the whole time I'm like, 301 00:13:38,992 --> 00:13:41,900 can I get the bar, the energy bar out of 302 00:13:41,906 --> 00:13:44,748 my bag? No, it's going to make noise. I can't make noise. I can't make 303 00:13:44,770 --> 00:13:47,708 noise. I can't make noise. And then that's just going through my head for the 304 00:13:47,730 --> 00:13:50,476 first 15 minutes. And then I'm desperately 305 00:13:50,604 --> 00:13:53,500 opening the tiny teeny little notebook they give you. And I'm 306 00:13:53,516 --> 00:13:56,416 like, I don't think I can draw, but I really want 307 00:13:56,454 --> 00:13:58,740 to. The whole thing is just 308 00:13:58,826 --> 00:14:01,540 constant hyper vigilance around 309 00:14:01,626 --> 00:14:04,176 how I am presenting. I think it's like constant 310 00:14:04,224 --> 00:14:07,220 masking. And you're so right. This was like 311 00:14:07,306 --> 00:14:09,942 instant unmasking, because 312 00:14:10,312 --> 00:14:13,302 I immediately felt like I didn't have to stop and 313 00:14:13,672 --> 00:14:16,616 get anxious about asking someone about where to go. I felt like 314 00:14:16,654 --> 00:14:19,496 someone was like, you got this? And I'm like, yeah, I do 315 00:14:19,534 --> 00:14:21,828 got this. Thanks for all the extra giant lettered 316 00:14:21,860 --> 00:14:23,924 signs and big arrows. 317 00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:24,602 Yes. 318 00:14:24,862 --> 00:14:27,518 and then, yeah, with the snacks, it was almost like 319 00:14:27,540 --> 00:14:30,382 permission is what it felt like with the fidgets everywhere. 320 00:14:31,042 --> 00:14:33,866 And there were clean Xboxes everywhere too, because, gosh, 321 00:14:33,914 --> 00:14:36,578 that always happens to me. I always need to blow my nose or cough or 322 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:39,282 whatever. All the body needs 323 00:14:39,352 --> 00:14:42,018 that would constantly be on 324 00:14:42,120 --> 00:14:44,846 my mind is like, oh, I can't reveal 325 00:14:44,894 --> 00:14:47,886 them. It just was permission. 326 00:14:47,934 --> 00:14:50,818 Just seeing it there, just seeing it out 327 00:14:50,920 --> 00:14:53,638 inside. Note all the snacks. The thing I didn't say all the 328 00:14:53,660 --> 00:14:56,438 snacks were in crinkly packaging. Did you 329 00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:59,446 notice this? And I loved it. And I was like, this is 330 00:14:59,484 --> 00:15:02,170 permission. This is also not like the thing you often see at a 331 00:15:02,176 --> 00:15:05,046 conference where it's like, take this muffin, this crumbly muffin, 332 00:15:05,094 --> 00:15:07,852 and just, like, silently choke it down. 333 00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:12,654 Well, I think it's incredible when the task isn't being 334 00:15:12,708 --> 00:15:13,242 quiet. 335 00:15:13,322 --> 00:15:14,046 Exactly. 336 00:15:14,244 --> 00:15:16,586 When the task is participation. 337 00:15:16,714 --> 00:15:17,392 Yes. 338 00:15:18,242 --> 00:15:21,118 That is encouraged by the organization. That's an 339 00:15:21,140 --> 00:15:23,950 incredible thing to feel. And that difference is just so 340 00:15:24,036 --> 00:15:26,924 amazing. it makes me, in this very 341 00:15:26,978 --> 00:15:29,212 distilled way, think about culture. 342 00:15:30,452 --> 00:15:33,328 The culture that we really have that 343 00:15:33,350 --> 00:15:35,878 is a part of being neurodivergent, and 344 00:15:35,900 --> 00:15:37,932 that any person 345 00:15:39,022 --> 00:15:41,946 getting an accommodation in a school, any person having 346 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:44,746 to talk to excuse why they're late, any 347 00:15:44,784 --> 00:15:47,386 person not wanting to spell in front of other 348 00:15:47,424 --> 00:15:49,994 people. People that don't want to play 349 00:15:50,048 --> 00:15:52,912 Scrabble. I heart you. I get it. 350 00:15:53,442 --> 00:15:56,032 This is a cultural piece. And I think 351 00:15:56,722 --> 00:15:59,326 when we can see these feelings as part of our 352 00:15:59,364 --> 00:16:02,138 culture but not part of our deficiencies, 353 00:16:02,330 --> 00:16:05,278 all of a sudden we can feel the difference when they're attended 354 00:16:05,310 --> 00:16:05,650 to. 355 00:16:05,736 --> 00:16:06,226 Yeah. 356 00:16:06,344 --> 00:16:09,042 We can feel like we belong in a place 357 00:16:09,192 --> 00:16:11,762 or it feels safer all of a sudden. 358 00:16:12,262 --> 00:16:15,118 And not that we need to have safe spaces everywhere because it's 359 00:16:15,150 --> 00:16:18,150 impossible, but oh my God, all of a 360 00:16:18,156 --> 00:16:20,998 sudden, not having to fight for every moment to 361 00:16:21,020 --> 00:16:23,990 pay attention gives me a lot more energy in a lot 362 00:16:23,996 --> 00:16:24,834 of other places. 363 00:16:24,898 --> 00:16:27,690 Exactly. Yes. Okay. So 364 00:16:27,776 --> 00:16:29,772 my feeling about it was 365 00:16:31,502 --> 00:16:34,106 I guess because it felt like it 366 00:16:34,144 --> 00:16:36,986 was so much was thought of and 367 00:16:37,024 --> 00:16:39,854 taken care of on that front right. 368 00:16:39,908 --> 00:16:42,426 On that kind of both sensory 369 00:16:42,554 --> 00:16:45,438 and I don't know the words for 370 00:16:45,460 --> 00:16:48,170 it, but it just felt like exactly what you're 371 00:16:48,186 --> 00:16:48,752 saying. 372 00:16:50,382 --> 00:16:53,320 the thing I want to name is, for me, it was an exceptional and I 373 00:16:53,326 --> 00:16:56,252 got so emotional, and I still will get emotional as I think about it. 374 00:16:56,322 --> 00:16:58,782 It was such an exceptional experience. 375 00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:02,076 I genuinely have never felt anything like it. 376 00:17:02,194 --> 00:17:05,048 I really haven't. And the places where I have felt 377 00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:07,856 it have been places where I have been authorized or maybe 378 00:17:07,894 --> 00:17:10,428 even tasked with creating the environment. 379 00:17:10,540 --> 00:17:13,376 So it's not that I deprive myself of those 380 00:17:13,414 --> 00:17:16,016 things when I have authority or ability to do 381 00:17:16,054 --> 00:17:18,848 that. I think about all the therapy offices I've 382 00:17:18,880 --> 00:17:21,860 ever been a part of or had a chance to make a 383 00:17:21,866 --> 00:17:23,462 playroom for or 384 00:17:24,472 --> 00:17:27,316 decorate my own office. That is what my 385 00:17:27,354 --> 00:17:30,196 office would feel like. I would have snacks 386 00:17:30,244 --> 00:17:33,122 always out. I would have or, places. It was 387 00:17:33,192 --> 00:17:35,572 against policy. I'd find a way. 388 00:17:36,022 --> 00:17:38,894 I'd always have tea. There's just like a constant 389 00:17:38,958 --> 00:17:41,582 way that I think it's something 390 00:17:41,672 --> 00:17:44,514 that I guess the weird 391 00:17:44,578 --> 00:17:47,314 feeling for me. And I imagine this is not dissimilar 392 00:17:47,378 --> 00:17:50,358 to I don't see like, 393 00:17:50,380 --> 00:17:53,378 I'm a child of immigrants and I sometimes feel this it's like a weird 394 00:17:53,410 --> 00:17:56,386 comparison. But I feel this way sometimes when I go visit 395 00:17:56,434 --> 00:17:58,812 Poland where my parents are from. 396 00:17:59,262 --> 00:18:02,186 But it's also not where I grew up, it's where all my other 397 00:18:02,224 --> 00:18:05,036 family grew up. But, the feeling I get when I go there 398 00:18:05,074 --> 00:18:07,232 is this, like it's this odd 399 00:18:07,572 --> 00:18:10,416 familiarity and I don't have to 400 00:18:10,454 --> 00:18:13,056 explain certain things or I feel 401 00:18:13,254 --> 00:18:15,744 just a certain sense of 402 00:18:15,798 --> 00:18:18,688 ease that I don't know I'm missing 403 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:21,636 when I'm not in that vibe. Right. Because I 404 00:18:21,674 --> 00:18:24,304 was raised primarily around other Polish 405 00:18:24,448 --> 00:18:26,662 immigrant families. Right. So 406 00:18:28,152 --> 00:18:30,756 something about that feels a lot like home. 407 00:18:30,954 --> 00:18:33,816 And then also just hearing that language spoken. There's a lot 408 00:18:33,854 --> 00:18:36,840 to it, but that's sort of what it felt like. But 409 00:18:36,926 --> 00:18:39,736 again, I only go there every couple of years, if not 410 00:18:39,774 --> 00:18:42,708 every half a decade, right? So it's 411 00:18:42,740 --> 00:18:45,340 also something I've gotten so used to at having to 412 00:18:45,426 --> 00:18:48,412 hold within myself and never really share. 413 00:18:48,562 --> 00:18:51,548 And I think that's the thing that makes me 414 00:18:51,570 --> 00:18:54,364 so emotional is I don't know that I've ever had that 415 00:18:54,418 --> 00:18:57,244 feeling synced up to a room 416 00:18:57,298 --> 00:19:00,032 of other people having the feeling at the same 417 00:19:00,102 --> 00:19:02,864 time, right? Does that make sense? I'd visit my family 418 00:19:02,998 --> 00:19:05,968 and I'd be like, well, I'm the one having that feeling. But they're all 419 00:19:05,990 --> 00:19:08,528 living here. They don't feel it. 420 00:19:08,630 --> 00:19:11,568 But this was me in a room where I'm simultaneously 421 00:19:11,680 --> 00:19:14,164 resonating off of all the other humans, also 422 00:19:14,218 --> 00:19:17,136 going, I think I just found my home planet 423 00:19:17,184 --> 00:19:18,982 a little bit. And then 424 00:19:20,652 --> 00:19:23,496 I just felt moved. I don't remember a 425 00:19:23,534 --> 00:19:26,024 time, literally since maybe the early 426 00:19:26,078 --> 00:19:28,728 postpartum days where I 427 00:19:28,830 --> 00:19:31,768 was so like, the tears, even as I say it, are 428 00:19:31,790 --> 00:19:34,252 just like my body just 429 00:19:34,402 --> 00:19:37,336 felt so big. It felt 430 00:19:37,384 --> 00:19:40,236 all the feels. It felt warm and 431 00:19:40,274 --> 00:19:43,260 fuzzy and sad and mad. And 432 00:19:43,346 --> 00:19:46,316 all the feelings that come, I think, from being like, where 433 00:19:46,354 --> 00:19:47,502 has this been? 434 00:19:49,712 --> 00:19:52,592 It's all of it, right? It's like, Where has this been? I needed 435 00:19:52,662 --> 00:19:55,488 this. And then on the other hand, it's like, I'm so happy it's here. 436 00:19:55,510 --> 00:19:58,502 And on the other hand, oh, no, it's going to be over soon. And 437 00:19:59,192 --> 00:20:02,036 all of it that 438 00:20:02,074 --> 00:20:04,980 surprised me. I don't know that I expected that at all, 439 00:20:05,066 --> 00:20:07,542 but I've talked a lot. Does that make sense? 440 00:20:08,312 --> 00:20:10,916 It's this part around I mean, if I get really 441 00:20:10,954 --> 00:20:13,832 technical, I think this is the part around intersectionality. 442 00:20:14,892 --> 00:20:17,828 I think this is a part of knowing all of a sudden, you're 443 00:20:17,860 --> 00:20:20,522 part of a group. You're not alone. 444 00:20:20,862 --> 00:20:23,854 You're part of a group that this world wasn't built 445 00:20:23,908 --> 00:20:26,342 for. and we have to do it our way. 446 00:20:26,712 --> 00:20:29,684 And when you see hundreds of other 447 00:20:29,738 --> 00:20:32,340 people doing it a little bit differently and not asking 448 00:20:32,426 --> 00:20:35,188 permission and not getting in 449 00:20:35,210 --> 00:20:37,860 trouble exactly. Not making 450 00:20:37,946 --> 00:20:40,836 problems. It wasn't like 451 00:20:40,874 --> 00:20:43,860 everyone go draw a tree in the corner and one person's, like, playing 452 00:20:43,876 --> 00:20:46,744 with fingerprints, like just making smiley faces. No, people 453 00:20:46,798 --> 00:20:49,708 were doing the trees. People were 454 00:20:49,730 --> 00:20:52,142 attending to the task with incredible detail. 455 00:20:52,092 --> 00:20:54,948 and it was an honor 456 00:20:54,980 --> 00:20:57,844 to watch these young adults forge 457 00:20:57,908 --> 00:21:00,572 a world that a lot of people are going to live in. 458 00:21:00,722 --> 00:21:03,516 Yeah. Oh, I miss it. Ah, does 459 00:21:03,554 --> 00:21:04,782 this happen to you? 460 00:21:06,432 --> 00:21:09,388 So now can I flip the question to you, David? Like, having 461 00:21:09,490 --> 00:21:12,262 done this, so many, like, M, 462 00:21:12,530 --> 00:21:15,424 what was your vibe? Do you remember what it felt like the first 463 00:21:15,478 --> 00:21:18,240 time you felt it? And then, what do you feel? 464 00:21:18,406 --> 00:21:21,340 What happens to you after you leave too, because that feels 465 00:21:21,356 --> 00:21:22,402 like a whole thing. 466 00:21:26,152 --> 00:21:29,028 This is so hard. This is so hard. I think I 467 00:21:29,050 --> 00:21:31,972 can answer so many parts of it. I think the first 468 00:21:32,042 --> 00:21:35,028 time I went was, oh 469 00:21:35,050 --> 00:21:37,720 my gosh, 15, 470 00:21:37,806 --> 00:21:40,728 1617 years ago, a while ago, a 471 00:21:40,750 --> 00:21:43,608 few years back. But it was a 472 00:21:43,630 --> 00:21:46,606 while ago. And, it was the 473 00:21:46,644 --> 00:21:49,492 first time in my life someone had made 474 00:21:51,142 --> 00:21:53,362 my learning style feel valuable. 475 00:21:55,862 --> 00:21:58,802 And I was in a grad school class and I was like, and 476 00:21:58,872 --> 00:22:01,730 I'm being the bombastic ADHD dude. And I'm 477 00:22:01,736 --> 00:22:04,406 like, blah, blah, blah. I'm sure I talked about ADHD or 478 00:22:04,444 --> 00:22:05,032 something, right? 479 00:22:05,032 --> 00:22:07,556 And then after class, one of my classmates was like, 480 00:22:07,594 --> 00:22:08,182 hey, 481 00:22:10,552 --> 00:22:13,268 the hurried whisper. And I was like, yeah, 482 00:22:13,450 --> 00:22:16,336 you were talking about ADHD and stuff. Do you have any interest 483 00:22:16,394 --> 00:22:19,304 in starting a program around 484 00:22:19,358 --> 00:22:22,184 here that works with high schools or college students 485 00:22:22,238 --> 00:22:24,808 with learning disabilities? And they match them up with middle school students with learning 486 00:22:24,830 --> 00:22:27,800 disabilities and they do art projects together and feel good? And 487 00:22:27,806 --> 00:22:30,668 I was like, this exists. I'd love to be 488 00:22:30,690 --> 00:22:31,142 part of it. 489 00:22:31,142 --> 00:22:31,282 HM? 490 00:22:32,112 --> 00:22:34,568 And she goes, oh, you're just going to have to talk to this guy, David 491 00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:36,602 Flink. He'll give you an interview. 492 00:22:36,602 --> 00:22:36,902 Mhm? 493 00:22:36,902 --> 00:22:39,820 And I was like, oh, I got an interview. And 494 00:22:39,826 --> 00:22:42,680 then I'm doing my whole, like, I'm going to kill this interview. What do I 495 00:22:42,706 --> 00:22:45,616 do? How do I get ready for this interview? All right, I'm going to talk about 496 00:22:45,814 --> 00:22:48,322 all these things that I studied or what I'm going to do 497 00:22:49,892 --> 00:22:52,500 the interview. I won't go through it like verbatim just 498 00:22:52,586 --> 00:22:55,556 because that's a private, really important moment that I got 499 00:22:55,594 --> 00:22:58,180 with David Flink. And it was important, but it 500 00:22:58,186 --> 00:23:00,980 was very quickly when I learned speaking 501 00:23:01,066 --> 00:23:04,024 about my learning differences, my 502 00:23:04,078 --> 00:23:05,432 neurodivergence, 503 00:23:08,172 --> 00:23:10,968 that's what he was interested in and not in 504 00:23:10,990 --> 00:23:13,882 an exploitive way. Yeah, 505 00:23:15,052 --> 00:23:17,896 and I've been used to that, like, oh, you got 506 00:23:17,934 --> 00:23:20,748 a learning difference over there. Come over here, we're going to help 507 00:23:20,770 --> 00:23:23,708 you. Quotient? I don't know. I don't know why my 508 00:23:23,730 --> 00:23:24,542 voice went. 509 00:23:26,112 --> 00:23:29,036 You know what you sounded? You sounded like a stage manager from like, 510 00:23:29,074 --> 00:23:32,032 Newsies or something. Like, we're going to exploit the kids 511 00:23:32,102 --> 00:23:34,560 and make them do an act. I don't know. 512 00:23:34,646 --> 00:23:35,744 We're going to make them do things. 513 00:23:35,798 --> 00:23:36,402 Yes. 514 00:23:37,412 --> 00:23:39,888 But it felt really holding. And it was this 515 00:23:39,910 --> 00:23:42,688 conversation where it's like, well, I'd love to have you be a 516 00:23:42,710 --> 00:23:45,588 mentor. And we have this thing, come on out to 517 00:23:45,610 --> 00:23:48,436 Brown University and we'll put you through this 518 00:23:48,474 --> 00:23:50,868 training. We'll teach you how to be a mentor. And I was like, 519 00:23:51,050 --> 00:23:54,022 Sounds great. And 520 00:23:54,632 --> 00:23:57,320 fast forward life to the summer in between 521 00:23:57,406 --> 00:24:00,136 one grad year to the next grad year when I'm going to this 522 00:24:00,174 --> 00:24:03,108 oi, I land. There's 523 00:24:03,140 --> 00:24:05,900 like 27 people at this time 524 00:24:05,986 --> 00:24:08,972 sitting like crisscross applesauce in 525 00:24:09,042 --> 00:24:11,852 a half moon circle around an easel. 526 00:24:12,272 --> 00:24:14,956 And David and Marcus are standing front 527 00:24:14,994 --> 00:24:17,756 easel with markers, like 528 00:24:17,954 --> 00:24:20,920 dreamboarding stuff. And we're just shouting out ideas, and they're 529 00:24:20,936 --> 00:24:23,664 trying to write the ideas on the board. And 530 00:24:23,718 --> 00:24:26,656 while this is happening, Grady, if you hear this, please 531 00:24:26,694 --> 00:24:29,248 know I miss your face and you've helped my life. Thank you, 532 00:24:29,270 --> 00:24:32,148 Grady. Grady is sitting there with this little racquetball and 533 00:24:32,170 --> 00:24:33,302 he's bouncing it. 534 00:24:38,392 --> 00:24:41,088 There's this rhythm to the way he's hitting, 535 00:24:41,120 --> 00:24:43,940 like and I just remember going like, 536 00:24:44,026 --> 00:24:46,968 man, he's bouncing a ball. And I 537 00:24:46,990 --> 00:24:49,892 remember thinking, like, you're not supposed to bounce a ball. He's going to get in trouble. 538 00:24:49,972 --> 00:24:52,264 And then I looked around and no one 539 00:24:52,318 --> 00:24:53,032 cared. 540 00:24:54,652 --> 00:24:55,508 and then all of a sudden. 541 00:24:55,540 --> 00:24:58,248 I was like, I want to bounce a ball. And then I was 542 00:24:58,270 --> 00:25:00,984 like, hey, Grady, do you have another 543 00:25:01,038 --> 00:25:03,960 ball? And he went, no, but here. And passed it 544 00:25:03,966 --> 00:25:06,776 right to me. And I went, oh, back to him. And then 545 00:25:06,814 --> 00:25:09,728 we're playing catch with this racquetball. And then we're playing catch, like, 546 00:25:09,750 --> 00:25:12,576 bounce it off the wall to the other person. Bounce it off the wall to the other person, 547 00:25:12,614 --> 00:25:15,488 then back to each other. And then how many bounces can you have 548 00:25:15,510 --> 00:25:18,192 before it hits the other person without it going flat? how little 549 00:25:18,230 --> 00:25:21,172 bounces can you get? So the whole time we're in this 550 00:25:21,210 --> 00:25:23,118 presentation, we are playing with these racquetballs 551 00:25:23,068 --> 00:25:25,786 At the same time we're playing with these racquetballs. Obviously 552 00:25:25,872 --> 00:25:28,826 distracted, marcus is trying to write the 553 00:25:28,832 --> 00:25:31,768 word benign on the easel M 554 00:25:32,798 --> 00:25:35,422 and stops and goes, 555 00:25:35,620 --> 00:25:37,994 does anyone know how to spell benign? 556 00:25:38,186 --> 00:25:41,086 And that question right when someone goes, does anyone know how 557 00:25:41,092 --> 00:25:43,902 to spell? Like, I have learned to become as small as 558 00:25:43,940 --> 00:25:46,894 humanly possible in that moment because I don't want to be the one 559 00:25:46,916 --> 00:25:49,906 that says, like, no, I don't know how to spell it. We need to find someone else. Because 560 00:25:49,992 --> 00:25:52,834 that's the answer. Impermanent, right? Like, I don't know how to 561 00:25:52,856 --> 00:25:55,826 spell that thing. Well, he's like, you didn't know how 562 00:25:55,832 --> 00:25:58,590 to spell benign? And the room was like crickets 563 00:25:58,654 --> 00:26:01,654 people blinking. And they're like, no. And everyone's like, 564 00:26:01,676 --> 00:26:04,534 no, I don't know how to spell benign. And he went, well, all 565 00:26:04,556 --> 00:26:07,494 right then. And just wrote the letter B and the 566 00:26:07,516 --> 00:26:10,454 number nine. And we kept going, that's 567 00:26:10,486 --> 00:26:13,482 so amazing. I'm like, this 568 00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:15,788 makes sense to me. No problem. 569 00:26:16,718 --> 00:26:19,514 And then it hits me. He's asking a 570 00:26:19,536 --> 00:26:22,506 question. Grady's answering, like, I 571 00:26:22,512 --> 00:26:25,446 don't know how to spell, but I'm answering it's not that we're not 572 00:26:25,472 --> 00:26:28,026 paying attention because we're bouncing the ball. All of a sudden, 573 00:26:28,202 --> 00:26:30,958 I didn't feel like I was in trouble or trying to hide 574 00:26:31,618 --> 00:26:34,278 in a classroom setting for the first time. 575 00:26:35,188 --> 00:26:37,796 even if I was on task in school, I would be 576 00:26:37,802 --> 00:26:40,612 like, there's something that I'm unaware of 577 00:26:40,650 --> 00:26:43,552 that I should have been doing that someone's going to call my attention 578 00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:43,860 to. 579 00:26:43,914 --> 00:26:44,420 Exactly. 580 00:26:44,554 --> 00:26:47,512 I'm just about to be caught. I'm about to be caught doing 581 00:26:47,550 --> 00:26:50,504 the thing I'm not supposed to be doing I didn't even know I wasn't supposed to 582 00:26:50,526 --> 00:26:51,258 be doing. 583 00:26:53,228 --> 00:26:56,120 So in this oi. I learned so much. 584 00:26:56,254 --> 00:26:59,016 So much. And I took so much from that experience 585 00:26:59,102 --> 00:27:02,076 and poured it into the counseling studying that I was doing to 586 00:27:02,082 --> 00:27:04,974 be therapist. Because, Marcus and David 587 00:27:05,006 --> 00:27:07,218 were like, ten years ahead of the movement 588 00:27:08,438 --> 00:27:11,202 when I first met them. They are still ten 589 00:27:11,240 --> 00:27:13,730 years ahead of the movement in terms of what they're actually 590 00:27:13,784 --> 00:27:16,706 doing. And they would deny that. They're 591 00:27:16,722 --> 00:27:19,686 like, no. And we listen to the kids, and the kids help direct us, and 592 00:27:19,692 --> 00:27:22,518 the young adults help direct us. And they're right, and they do, 593 00:27:22,668 --> 00:27:25,186 but they are right. And so 594 00:27:25,956 --> 00:27:28,572 fast forward, I get super involved. I start traveling 595 00:27:28,604 --> 00:27:31,584 around, giving talks about ADHD and how to 596 00:27:31,590 --> 00:27:34,226 come together and neurodivergence and all this stuff. 597 00:27:35,016 --> 00:27:37,926 And then a short while ago, 598 00:27:38,696 --> 00:27:41,536 one of the closest people in my life, my brother, 599 00:27:41,616 --> 00:27:44,528 died. And his death 600 00:27:44,592 --> 00:27:46,824 was nothing short of 601 00:27:46,830 --> 00:27:49,784 horrific and it required a 602 00:27:49,790 --> 00:27:50,656 lot of attention. 603 00:27:51,566 --> 00:27:54,266 And so the moment I found out 604 00:27:54,336 --> 00:27:55,466 he was dying, 605 00:27:58,446 --> 00:28:01,272 I remember talking with Jennifer Cain, shortly after this, 606 00:28:01,294 --> 00:28:04,052 but I remember talking with people, saying, I'm 607 00:28:04,084 --> 00:28:06,056 done, I'm not going anywhere. 608 00:28:07,196 --> 00:28:09,540 I saw myself wanting to visit my brother 609 00:28:09,668 --> 00:28:12,632 every couple of weeks, every three weeks. And that was going to take 610 00:28:12,654 --> 00:28:15,612 my whole time and everything was going to go towards that. And if they ever 611 00:28:15,634 --> 00:28:18,440 needed me, I didn't want to be in Brown 612 00:28:18,488 --> 00:28:21,308 or Denver or San Francisco or Reno. I just wanted 613 00:28:21,362 --> 00:28:22,636 to be around home. 614 00:28:23,206 --> 00:28:26,162 And so when he was sick and when I call everyone, I 615 00:28:26,184 --> 00:28:28,690 actually thought I would never get to see anyone ever 616 00:28:28,728 --> 00:28:31,106 again. And so this 617 00:28:31,176 --> 00:28:33,076 trip out with you, 618 00:28:35,566 --> 00:28:38,442 it just reminded me what 619 00:28:38,464 --> 00:28:40,762 I know to be true about people, 620 00:28:40,944 --> 00:28:43,546 that it's important to have hope in people 621 00:28:43,616 --> 00:28:46,330 and people will surprise you. 622 00:28:46,448 --> 00:28:49,140 And, here I go 623 00:28:49,178 --> 00:28:51,976 from starting with 27 people, like, sitting around 624 00:28:52,046 --> 00:28:54,616 have circles that now there's 625 00:28:55,836 --> 00:28:58,660 audiobooks being sent out to workshop 626 00:28:58,708 --> 00:29:01,540 tables that have fidget spinners and iPhones 627 00:29:01,588 --> 00:29:04,492 that they're communicating to the app so they could all share questions, but 628 00:29:04,514 --> 00:29:07,388 no one has to raise their hand. The levels of things 629 00:29:07,442 --> 00:29:09,948 that they were doing and how sophisticated they are 630 00:29:10,002 --> 00:29:12,892 now. Not saying they weren't sophisticated back then, 631 00:29:12,914 --> 00:29:15,728 but where they are now. It kind of feels like that day 632 00:29:15,782 --> 00:29:18,432 where you leave your small town and you're like, 633 00:29:18,534 --> 00:29:21,488 bye everyone, I'll see you in a few years. And then 634 00:29:21,542 --> 00:29:24,464 I go have a real scoop of ice cream in a big city. I'm 635 00:29:24,470 --> 00:29:27,252 like, oh my God, I can't wait to tell everyone. And I go back home 636 00:29:27,354 --> 00:29:30,000 and everyone's grown up and home has spaceships 637 00:29:30,048 --> 00:29:30,646 now. 638 00:29:31,336 --> 00:29:32,356 It's amazing. 639 00:29:32,506 --> 00:29:35,392 And so coming back and being amazed 640 00:29:35,424 --> 00:29:38,420 by how incredible they are, how incredible their mentors 641 00:29:38,468 --> 00:29:41,032 are right now, how incredible their alumni is, like, their 642 00:29:41,054 --> 00:29:43,416 resources, the keynote speaker, 643 00:29:45,996 --> 00:29:47,256 don't spoiler. 644 00:29:49,526 --> 00:29:52,370 but it was such an incredible experience. And 645 00:29:52,488 --> 00:29:55,410 for me, I knew you 646 00:29:55,448 --> 00:29:57,476 hadn't seen anything like this before. 647 00:29:59,686 --> 00:30:01,096 It's pretty obvious. 648 00:30:02,426 --> 00:30:03,238 No one has. 649 00:30:03,292 --> 00:30:04,456 Yeah, no one has. 650 00:30:06,266 --> 00:30:08,854 And there's this look 651 00:30:08,940 --> 00:30:11,798 that I've seen so many people have in 652 00:30:11,932 --> 00:30:14,550 so many times that I've been to the Oi and the only 653 00:30:14,588 --> 00:30:17,482 way I m can't make this face authentically so 654 00:30:17,504 --> 00:30:19,962 I'm not going to try to make it. I'll just say the things 655 00:30:20,144 --> 00:30:22,490 it's like you saw a 656 00:30:22,528 --> 00:30:25,506 dragon for the first time, It was nice, 657 00:30:25,666 --> 00:30:28,590 it shrunk to the size of a pea and 658 00:30:28,628 --> 00:30:29,776 went into your heart. 659 00:30:31,346 --> 00:30:33,856 That is totally what it is. 660 00:30:37,126 --> 00:30:39,666 It's a happy pea heart dragon. 661 00:30:41,046 --> 00:30:43,922 There's a shock bit of like this can't be 662 00:30:43,944 --> 00:30:45,036 real life, mhm? 663 00:30:45,366 --> 00:30:48,082 Very much so. Very much so. Like walking just 664 00:30:48,104 --> 00:30:50,982 walking around going what? Is this for 665 00:30:51,004 --> 00:30:51,576 real? 666 00:30:52,586 --> 00:30:55,542 Thank you so much for listening. If you ever have that thought where you 667 00:30:55,564 --> 00:30:58,402 think, hey, I'm nothing. Stop. Remember you're 668 00:30:58,434 --> 00:31:00,918 something something's shiny that's right. 669 00:31:01,052 --> 00:31:04,022 Just as you are. If you like what you heard and 670 00:31:04,044 --> 00:31:06,470 you want to hear more free episodes of this 671 00:31:06,508 --> 00:31:09,286 podcast, please subscribe rate 672 00:31:09,356 --> 00:31:12,342 and review anywhere you listen to podcasts, we're on 673 00:31:12,364 --> 00:31:14,874 Instagram Something Shiny podcast 674 00:31:15,050 --> 00:31:17,882 and if you're looking for more information, useful links, 675 00:31:17,914 --> 00:31:20,750 definitions, visuals, everything we can think 676 00:31:20,788 --> 00:31:22,622 of and more is on our 677 00:31:22,644 --> 00:31:26,334 website@somethingshinypodcast.com 678 00:31:26,420 --> 00:31:28,862 and it's all free. Thank you so much for 679 00:31:28,884 --> 00:31:29,982 listening and. 680 00:31:30,004 --> 00:31:31,616 We'Ll see you in two weeks.