WEBVTT NOTE This file was generated by Descript 00:00:01.339 --> 00:00:04.439 Speaker: Hey, this is Mark Butler and you are listening to a podcast for coaches. 00:00:05.279 --> 00:00:11.799 I am thinking a lot lately about the challenges that coaches face 00:00:12.420 --> 00:00:17.590 specifically new coaches, but I believe these issues extend to all coaches. 00:00:17.959 --> 00:00:20.579 You see in the rest of the professional services world, whether we're 00:00:20.580 --> 00:00:24.240 talking about doctors, lawyers, accountants, and therapists, and 00:00:24.240 --> 00:00:29.180 those kinds of professionals, all of them come out of a training period. 00:00:29.560 --> 00:00:34.880 an education period and go into a practice period, like a supervised practice period. 00:00:35.589 --> 00:00:38.070 And for doctors, it's called residency, of course. 00:00:38.070 --> 00:00:42.019 And then for therapists, they have to do some number of hundreds 00:00:42.019 --> 00:00:45.759 of hours of supervised work. 00:00:46.360 --> 00:00:48.669 in collaboration with a licensed therapist. 00:00:49.239 --> 00:00:50.979 I talked last week about certifications. 00:00:51.030 --> 00:00:54.439 And although I don't believe in certifications per se, because I think 00:00:54.440 --> 00:00:58.830 it's just humans giving other humans permission to do stuff or not do stuff. 00:00:59.289 --> 00:01:05.080 What I do believe in Is supported practice, I believe very strongly in 00:01:05.080 --> 00:01:09.800 it and in all these other environments like medicine and like therapy and like 00:01:09.800 --> 00:01:13.219 accounting, you know, like accounting, you go in, you work in a firm and you, 00:01:13.249 --> 00:01:17.879 you, or in a law firm, you go and you grind at the lower levels of the firm 00:01:18.669 --> 00:01:21.589 and you get your reps and you get your practice and you get your skill. 00:01:23.255 --> 00:01:27.585 Well, coaches come into coaching, having to learn a bunch of stuff at 00:01:27.585 --> 00:01:32.255 the same time, but not really having a place in time in which to practice it. 00:01:32.264 --> 00:01:36.245 So we're telling these new coaches come on into the world of coaching. 00:01:36.705 --> 00:01:37.155 Good news. 00:01:37.155 --> 00:01:38.635 It's an unregulated industry. 00:01:38.635 --> 00:01:39.449 So have at it. 00:01:39.620 --> 00:01:40.340 You know, right. 00:01:40.380 --> 00:01:42.470 I am a coach and red crayon and a napkin. 00:01:42.470 --> 00:01:43.250 Congratulations. 00:01:43.250 --> 00:01:43.920 You're a coach. 00:01:44.210 --> 00:01:45.460 I know this bothers some people. 00:01:45.480 --> 00:01:46.680 It does not bother me. 00:01:46.730 --> 00:01:47.540 I'm for it. 00:01:48.259 --> 00:01:54.239 The issue is without a structured space and time in which to practice, 00:01:54.670 --> 00:01:59.050 coaches are having to learn all of these things at once sales and marketing 00:01:59.530 --> 00:02:04.000 and Coaching and holding space and maybe teaching and maybe facilitation. 00:02:05.309 --> 00:02:09.660 It's a solo project to try to go out and develop all of these skills at once. 00:02:09.699 --> 00:02:10.729 And it's daunting. 00:02:10.739 --> 00:02:16.789 And I think that too many coaches quit because if they don't have 00:02:16.790 --> 00:02:22.009 a professional background or a strong, natural aptitude for. 00:02:22.665 --> 00:02:28.095 A few of these core skills, they struggle to get momentum and they quit. 00:02:28.775 --> 00:02:35.885 And this bothers me because today more than ever, I believe in coaching and 00:02:35.885 --> 00:02:38.204 I'm not just talking about myself. 00:02:38.394 --> 00:02:38.755 Yes. 00:02:38.755 --> 00:02:43.905 My confidence is growing, but more than ever, I believe in the fact that a 00:02:43.905 --> 00:02:50.115 person will benefit from spending time with a trusted other in exploration. 00:02:50.500 --> 00:02:52.580 And discovery and inquiry. 00:02:52.770 --> 00:02:54.600 I've never believed more strongly in it. 00:02:56.640 --> 00:02:57.890 I don't have blinders on. 00:02:58.520 --> 00:03:01.040 I'm aware of stuff that gets said about coaching. 00:03:01.050 --> 00:03:02.230 I'm aware of the media. 00:03:02.549 --> 00:03:05.989 I could not care any less more than ever. 00:03:05.989 --> 00:03:11.839 I believe in a person , spending extended time with a trusted other 00:03:13.639 --> 00:03:17.569 and using that space and time to discover things about themselves. 00:03:18.189 --> 00:03:25.209 To make new plans, set new goals, heal, learn, and break through. 00:03:26.289 --> 00:03:31.189 So the question in my mind is how do I participate in the coaching community 00:03:31.209 --> 00:03:38.499 in a way that helps more helpers break through, find their footing, establish 00:03:38.499 --> 00:03:43.379 themselves and succeed according to their definition of success. 00:03:44.964 --> 00:03:47.784 And I don't think we have great solutions in the community yet. 00:03:47.874 --> 00:03:49.354 I think we have some solutions. 00:03:50.114 --> 00:03:54.264 I'm not in a position to make a blanket statement that the community is failing. 00:03:54.734 --> 00:03:59.134 I'm sure that there are many, many training programs out there who actually 00:03:59.134 --> 00:04:02.924 do a very good job with creating an environment where there's a space and 00:04:02.924 --> 00:04:07.354 time for a person to practice in a supervised and supported way and improve. 00:04:08.194 --> 00:04:09.604 My concern is. 00:04:10.124 --> 00:04:15.084 Too often, those environments are inside of training programs and certification 00:04:15.084 --> 00:04:18.174 programs, which are so expensive. 00:04:19.634 --> 00:04:24.044 That maybe the majority of coaches, new coaches and established coaches, 00:04:24.474 --> 00:04:26.844 would view the cost as a hurdle. 00:04:27.874 --> 00:04:30.964 If I'm in the rest of the professional services world, I honestly don't even 00:04:30.964 --> 00:04:32.544 know if you pay for continuing education. 00:04:32.574 --> 00:04:37.074 I'm, I imagine you do, but I imagine you don't pay a lot for it. 00:04:37.994 --> 00:04:41.254 My guess would be, and I'm just guessing and someone will 00:04:41.254 --> 00:04:43.044 correct me via email, I'm sure. 00:04:43.719 --> 00:04:47.119 That the cost for a continuing education credit is maybe 00:04:47.119 --> 00:04:49.529 in the hundreds of dollars. 00:04:50.779 --> 00:04:55.159 , and I would imagine that for someone in the professional services world to 00:04:55.159 --> 00:05:00.969 maintain their license, to complete their, their continuing education requirements, I 00:05:00.969 --> 00:05:03.469 imagine it's not prohibitively expensive. 00:05:06.119 --> 00:05:10.269 But if every time a coach wants to get into a space where they can practice 00:05:10.309 --> 00:05:15.889 and where they can be supported, if they have to spend four or five, 10, 00:05:15.890 --> 00:05:19.559 15, 000 some will do it often because they have the means and the desire. 00:05:20.009 --> 00:05:24.049 Some will do it occasionally because they can swing it occasionally 00:05:24.339 --> 00:05:25.659 and many won't do it at all. 00:05:27.439 --> 00:05:33.089 So I think there's an opportunity for us as coaches to create environments in which 00:05:34.769 --> 00:05:37.639 coaches can practice in a supported way 00:05:40.129 --> 00:05:46.019 at a price that makes it easy and desirable for them to do it often, 00:05:46.029 --> 00:05:51.509 to make it part of their weekly, monthly or annual coaching practice. 00:05:52.280 --> 00:05:56.220 I think the benefits will be not just an improvement in the quality 00:05:56.220 --> 00:06:00.840 of the Industry wide coaching skill and, and competence and confidence. 00:06:01.330 --> 00:06:04.830 I also believe that this will satisfy a networking and marketing function 00:06:05.630 --> 00:06:10.040 for coaches, because another thing that I think that we're lacking in the 00:06:10.360 --> 00:06:12.830 coaching community is trust networks. 00:06:13.525 --> 00:06:19.615 I want to have at my fingertips, at any given moment, a list of coaches that 00:06:19.615 --> 00:06:22.300 I trust and And that I can refer to. 00:06:23.790 --> 00:06:28.120 I probably already mentioned this on the podcast, but a few months ago I 00:06:28.130 --> 00:06:36.030 gave a referral and very recently I got a message from the client that 00:06:36.030 --> 00:06:42.429 I had referred, thanking me for connecting them with their coach. 00:06:43.810 --> 00:06:49.540 That may be the thing I'm most excited about in 2024, that one message, 00:06:50.800 --> 00:06:53.370 knowing that I was part of a connection. 00:06:54.420 --> 00:07:00.080 That got that client great support and gave that coach a great client. 00:07:01.150 --> 00:07:02.330 I love my clients. 00:07:02.770 --> 00:07:04.550 I love being able to provide for my family. 00:07:04.570 --> 00:07:10.220 These are amazing things, but weirdly, the thing I may be most excited about 00:07:10.240 --> 00:07:14.050 in 2024 is that one message where a person said, I just want to thank 00:07:14.050 --> 00:07:15.580 you for connecting me with my coach. 00:07:16.080 --> 00:07:19.180 I cannot believe how much I'm learning, how much I'm growing 00:07:19.420 --> 00:07:20.870 and how differently I feel. 00:07:22.585 --> 00:07:24.775 Even though it's still very early in that relationship. 00:07:25.935 --> 00:07:31.615 As a community of coaches, we can look at ways to facilitate more of that, 00:07:32.615 --> 00:07:38.025 more trust so that when we become aware of a person who's in pain or a person 00:07:38.025 --> 00:07:41.945 who's aspiring to something new in their life, and if we're confident that we're 00:07:41.945 --> 00:07:46.865 not the person to give that service, as I was with this client, that we can 00:07:46.865 --> 00:07:49.155 quickly and confidently make a referral. 00:07:50.740 --> 00:07:51.630 To a trusted, 00:07:53.680 --> 00:08:00.280 If that idea is not exciting to you, then I'm afraid you've been unduly 00:08:00.290 --> 00:08:04.100 influenced by all the marketing and sales copy that is in the world that 00:08:04.100 --> 00:08:07.250 talks about advertising and funnels. 00:08:07.925 --> 00:08:14.575 And all of that other stuff, because if you exist within a network 00:08:14.585 --> 00:08:21.235 of trust, and if you actively participate in that network, that can 00:08:21.235 --> 00:08:23.095 be the only marketing you ever do. 00:08:24.285 --> 00:08:29.175 And I would submit that it will be the best, most enjoyable, lowest 00:08:29.185 --> 00:08:32.015 hassle marketing you ever do. 00:08:33.275 --> 00:08:36.225 Active participation in a network of trust. 00:08:37.200 --> 00:08:39.210 So why am I saying all this today? 00:08:39.340 --> 00:08:41.030 Well, it's not because I have anything to pitch. 00:08:41.140 --> 00:08:43.410 I do want to create something like this. 00:08:43.680 --> 00:08:47.760 I've already reached out to a friend and said, I think we should collaborate 00:08:47.790 --> 00:08:50.470 on the creation of something like this. 00:08:51.260 --> 00:08:53.040 And we're going to get together in a couple of weeks and we're going 00:08:53.040 --> 00:08:57.040 to talk about, how it benefits her, how it benefits me, but more than 00:08:57.050 --> 00:08:59.680 anything, how it benefits the community. 00:09:00.545 --> 00:09:05.235 So there's more and more trust Between coaches and between coaches 00:09:05.255 --> 00:09:09.875 and the people in their lives that they that they influence So that more 00:09:09.875 --> 00:09:15.900 and more people have an opportunity to explore and discover In a safe 00:09:15.900 --> 00:09:17.760 setting with a trusted other. 00:09:19.710 --> 00:09:23.700 I'm saying this here on this podcast because I may create 00:09:23.700 --> 00:09:26.010 one and I think it'll be great. 00:09:27.280 --> 00:09:32.510 I want other people to create these same kinds of spaces. 00:09:34.460 --> 00:09:36.810 I have a particular set of biases. 00:09:37.260 --> 00:09:43.860 I have my way of being, I have my culture, I have my gender, I have my ethnicity. 00:09:44.790 --> 00:09:48.790 I'm not trying to think about how I can make a space for everyone. 00:09:50.280 --> 00:09:53.800 I want to make a space in which I'm excited to be. 00:09:54.900 --> 00:09:58.970 I want other people to create a space in which they're excited to be. 00:10:00.170 --> 00:10:04.480 And I want them to invite and attract people who are excited 00:10:04.480 --> 00:10:05.610 to spend time with them. 00:10:07.450 --> 00:10:13.740 I imagine hundreds or thousands of these kinds of spaces in which coaches 00:10:13.840 --> 00:10:18.950 are practicing, getting support, getting correction, giving correction. 00:10:20.230 --> 00:10:22.400 And growing in competence and confidence. 00:10:23.660 --> 00:10:26.650 One of the beauties of the coaching industry is that it's unregulated. 00:10:27.770 --> 00:10:32.320 I have a little bit of a libertarian streak in me and the libertarian in me 00:10:32.320 --> 00:10:37.000 says, there doesn't need to be a lot of rules and regulations around this. 00:10:37.860 --> 00:10:40.850 What we hope is that people will be guided by a set of ethics. 00:10:41.930 --> 00:10:42.740 They'll be guided. 00:10:43.260 --> 00:10:48.200 By a moral standard that drives them in their life and that they will 00:10:48.210 --> 00:10:53.030 create spaces in which people who share their ethics, who have similar 00:10:53.030 --> 00:10:58.620 moral standards, similar desires, find their way into their own communities. 00:10:59.390 --> 00:11:04.540 Whatever that community looks like and in that space grow together 00:11:07.270 --> 00:11:11.250 Just to give you a little bit more of a sense of what this might look 00:11:11.270 --> 00:11:17.200 like what I imagine for myself would be a thing that is first of 00:11:17.200 --> 00:11:21.180 all, not a Social media community. 00:11:21.250 --> 00:11:25.210 So I'm not thinking for myself I'm not thinking about a Facebook group or 00:11:25.210 --> 00:11:29.850 a slack group or anything that looks like that because I don't like those 00:11:30.740 --> 00:11:31.930 it's not that I think they're bad. 00:11:31.940 --> 00:11:35.180 It's that I have no interest whatsoever in participating in those. 00:11:35.760 --> 00:11:38.570 Also, my priority here is the practice. 00:11:39.690 --> 00:11:45.100 So I want to show up to a zoom room, for example, or a physical room in 00:11:45.100 --> 00:11:46.870 which there is a group of coaches. 00:11:47.595 --> 00:11:52.675 And a client, one of the coaches can be the client. 00:11:52.715 --> 00:11:53.685 I'm fine with that. 00:11:54.065 --> 00:11:57.125 And then what we're doing is we're observing a coaching interaction 00:12:00.105 --> 00:12:01.925 and the coaching interaction is not a quick one. 00:12:01.985 --> 00:12:02.945 It's not 10 minutes. 00:12:02.955 --> 00:12:03.805 It's not 15 minutes. 00:12:03.815 --> 00:12:07.935 It's probably 45 minutes where one coach and one client are interacting 00:12:09.135 --> 00:12:11.435 and everyone else is observing silently. 00:12:12.725 --> 00:12:14.455 Maybe you play with the structure. 00:12:14.455 --> 00:12:18.405 Maybe you play with the, the interaction between coach, client, and observers. 00:12:18.980 --> 00:12:22.970 These things can iterate and evolve over time, but more than anything, 00:12:23.010 --> 00:12:28.630 I imagine the observers sitting and making notes and having their own 00:12:28.640 --> 00:12:31.850 thoughts about what they're learning from observing the interaction. 00:12:32.050 --> 00:12:37.230 Here's some questions that I, as an observer, would want to bring to this. 00:12:37.790 --> 00:12:41.160 If I'm watching a coach work with a client, I'm going to be asking 00:12:41.160 --> 00:12:45.470 myself questions like, what is this coach's approach to questions? 00:12:45.985 --> 00:12:47.455 What kinds of questions do they ask? 00:12:47.455 --> 00:12:48.825 How do they ask those questions? 00:12:50.085 --> 00:12:52.175 What is the coach's approach to silence? 00:12:52.595 --> 00:12:54.165 How much silence do they use? 00:12:55.565 --> 00:12:57.895 Because I don't believe there's a right answer to the amount of silence. 00:12:57.965 --> 00:13:01.745 I tend to sometimes be very quiet in a coaching session. 00:13:01.995 --> 00:13:05.395 And sometimes, as I've told you before, I'm talking a lot. 00:13:05.415 --> 00:13:06.195 I'm monologuing. 00:13:06.295 --> 00:13:07.025 It happens. 00:13:07.695 --> 00:13:09.125 I think that both have their place. 00:13:09.555 --> 00:13:10.455 At least apparently they do. 00:13:10.455 --> 00:13:11.745 My clients haven't complained. 00:13:12.735 --> 00:13:16.185 But I want to watch other coaches and see what their approach is to silence. 00:13:17.315 --> 00:13:19.135 I want to see the coach's facial expressions. 00:13:19.205 --> 00:13:20.945 I want to see the coach's body language. 00:13:21.795 --> 00:13:26.215 I want to observe what isn't being said between coach and client. 00:13:27.305 --> 00:13:30.725 I want to observe the coach's approach to advice. 00:13:31.660 --> 00:13:33.160 To suggested action. 00:13:34.470 --> 00:13:36.110 I want to see whether they do that at all. 00:13:36.120 --> 00:13:38.050 And if they do it, I want to see how they do it. 00:13:38.700 --> 00:13:42.630 I want an opportunity to say, huh, how would I integrate what I just 00:13:42.630 --> 00:13:44.890 observed into my work with my clients? 00:13:46.190 --> 00:13:49.160 I want to see whether the coach teaches in session. 00:13:50.120 --> 00:13:51.880 Are they introducing specific concepts? 00:13:51.930 --> 00:13:53.740 Are they introducing specific concepts? 00:13:53.810 --> 00:13:55.550 Are they defining those concepts? 00:13:57.480 --> 00:14:01.120 How are they engaging with their client around these named concepts? 00:14:01.290 --> 00:14:02.290 Do they do it at all? 00:14:03.880 --> 00:14:06.090 How do I think it's landing with the client they're talking to? 00:14:07.455 --> 00:14:11.535 I'm curious to observe how other coaches lead in their sessions. 00:14:12.315 --> 00:14:14.805 How do they progress through a session? 00:14:15.655 --> 00:14:16.645 How do they start it? 00:14:17.605 --> 00:14:18.785 How do they keep it on track? 00:14:18.845 --> 00:14:20.135 How do they course correct? 00:14:20.905 --> 00:14:21.725 How do they end? 00:14:23.625 --> 00:14:25.288 I want to observe all of these things. 00:14:26.108 --> 00:14:28.569 And then in that same space and time, I want to have a discussion 00:14:28.569 --> 00:14:29.689 with other coaches in the room. 00:14:30.984 --> 00:14:32.074 What did we all learn here? 00:14:32.764 --> 00:14:34.114 What was your take on this? 00:14:34.184 --> 00:14:35.434 What did you think was the best? 00:14:35.454 --> 00:14:36.434 What was most effective? 00:14:36.434 --> 00:14:37.754 What do you think was least effective? 00:14:38.104 --> 00:14:41.674 Coach, how did you feel while you were coaching? 00:14:42.964 --> 00:14:47.924 Client, I'm curious whether this particular thing landed with you or not. 00:14:49.624 --> 00:14:53.184 I believe these things are happening in little tiny doses 00:14:53.204 --> 00:14:54.274 in the coaching industry. 00:14:55.299 --> 00:14:59.269 What I want to observe and what I want to participate in and maybe 00:14:59.269 --> 00:15:05.779 what I want to lead is a setting in which all of us as coaches show up 00:15:05.779 --> 00:15:11.119 to these kinds of settings frequently and throughout our entire careers. 00:15:12.394 --> 00:15:13.554 That's what I imagine. 00:15:14.974 --> 00:15:17.624 I don't view it as an easy task because you have to create an 00:15:17.624 --> 00:15:22.184 environment that people actually want to show up to and participate in. 00:15:22.904 --> 00:15:24.594 And that's not necessarily easy. 00:15:25.334 --> 00:15:27.604 You have to manage the community dynamics. 00:15:27.604 --> 00:15:30.734 You have to manage the group dynamics in the specific session. 00:15:31.144 --> 00:15:35.084 You're going to have one person in a group of five or six who probably 00:15:35.084 --> 00:15:38.814 tends to dominate the conversation, who may derail the conversation. 00:15:38.879 --> 00:15:39.689 It could happen. 00:15:40.219 --> 00:15:43.659 You'll probably have one or maybe two in that group who 00:15:43.659 --> 00:15:45.189 don't want to participate at all. 00:15:45.379 --> 00:15:48.179 They want to be there, but they're nervous to say anything. 00:15:49.214 --> 00:15:53.614 So you have to work to help them participate, or you have to have 00:15:53.614 --> 00:15:57.264 an understanding in your little group of what does it look like to 00:15:57.264 --> 00:16:00.264 participate, maybe it's fine to just show up and be silent the whole time. 00:16:00.624 --> 00:16:05.834 So you have to create structures that make this appealing to people such that 00:16:05.834 --> 00:16:08.224 they keep showing up and participating. 00:16:09.974 --> 00:16:14.674 I don't view it as easy, but I do view it as possible and as important. 00:16:15.864 --> 00:16:21.194 So I bring this to you today because I hope you'll think about doing it. 00:16:23.114 --> 00:16:28.084 I probably will create one of these, but I do not want it to be the only one. 00:16:28.114 --> 00:16:32.064 I want it to be one of hundreds or maybe one of thousands. 00:16:34.549 --> 00:16:37.759 Some of the benefits will be apparent and expected. 00:16:38.109 --> 00:16:42.719 And I think there will be lots of unanticipated, unexpected, 00:16:43.389 --> 00:16:49.499 significant benefits that come from these kinds of groups popping up. 00:16:51.209 --> 00:16:52.929 I'm not here to tell anyone how to do it. 00:16:53.849 --> 00:16:55.609 I'm not here to tell anyone how to price it. 00:16:56.269 --> 00:16:58.279 You can charge thousands of dollars for it. 00:16:59.554 --> 00:17:00.474 That's up to you. 00:17:01.404 --> 00:17:10.934 I don't think I will because I don't want that hurdle in the way of the mission of 00:17:10.954 --> 00:17:16.954 the group, but if you want to charge a jillion dollars for it, by all means, if 00:17:16.954 --> 00:17:19.474 you want to charge 0 for it, by all means, 00:17:20.834 --> 00:17:24.174 the main thing is let's think about what kinds of spaces 00:17:24.174 --> 00:17:26.414 can we create where coaches. 00:17:27.294 --> 00:17:32.904 Come together, counsel together, support each other, learn from 00:17:32.904 --> 00:17:38.854 each other, and raise the level of our work across the whole industry 00:17:39.434 --> 00:17:40.724 and across the whole community. 00:17:41.894 --> 00:17:44.914 I don't believe we need increased regulation in the world of coaching. 00:17:46.294 --> 00:17:51.134 I think regulation is a security blanket for people who are very 00:17:51.134 --> 00:17:52.644 worried about harm being done. 00:17:53.144 --> 00:17:55.254 I also am worried about harm being done. 00:17:56.029 --> 00:17:58.569 But I don't think you can legislate ethics. 00:17:58.779 --> 00:18:00.889 I don't think you can legislate skill. 00:18:02.379 --> 00:18:08.419 I think you have to make skill and ethics attractive and appealing and create a 00:18:08.419 --> 00:18:15.189 place in a time in which it is easy for a person to practice a skillful, thoughtful, 00:18:15.279 --> 00:18:16.789 ethical approach to their work. 00:18:18.529 --> 00:18:19.919 So let's see if we can do that. 00:18:21.909 --> 00:18:22.839 Let's see if we can do that. 00:18:24.119 --> 00:18:24.999 I'll talk to you next time.