Bachelor Massacre

I can't decide if I prefer "Erotic fiction leads to neurotic friction" or "Serena's a snack and Sarah cracks." Thoughts?

Show Notes

Welcome to Bachelor Massacre! This episode originally appeared as bonus content on the J Waves podcast Lurk Mode.

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I hope Bachelor contestant Sarah Trott has been staying hydrated because the amount of tears she shed this weak was torrential. Yet even as I write this I am finding out that she had been hanging with G-Eazy before going on the show, so no wonder she was depressed. Wack rappers will do a number on your nervous system. You can't even be in the same room with them, they will suck the life out of you. But damn I'm stoked that I was not the only one who thought that she was giving off serious Annie Murphy vibes! And surprise surprise, she has a podcast.

This time around Sarah is our new villain but that doesn't mean that Queen Victoria isn't going to get her screen time. Though it just occurred to me that the other women are probably scared of Victoria because she talked MAD SHIT last week and no one had the will to tell her to properly fuck off but as soon as lil timid Sarah starts tripping some of these girls acted like a head was about to roll. Thank goodness we have Katie, a dildo-swingin angel-on-earth, to put things in perspective.

Join J Waves and MandySays as they talk about tears, tingles, and turtlenecks.

Music in this episode:

"I Need Love" - LL Cool J
"Da' Dip" - Freak Nasty

What is Bachelor Massacre?

A foul-mouthed Bachelor/Bachelorette recap show created by wannabe celebrity chef Amanda Quincosa and washed up rapper J Waves. Currently hosted by Waves, Amanda (aka Mandy), and Scotty Boombox. Brought to you by Sparse Mansion Media.