Good morning.
And welcome to morning cereal
Okay, good morning and
welcome to Wednesday.
It's the middle of the week, people.
I mean, pat yourself on the back.
That's gotta count for something, right?
And great news.
You know how I always
like to bring you good news.
And the good news today is,
and do this in the most
appropriate way possible,
obviously, but we can all
celebrate National Hug Day.
And don't sleep on hugs, A,
they're great for the soul,
but B, there's science behind them,
if you're into that sort of stuff.
But the science has proven
the benefits of a simple hug.
First, there's a
natural release of oxytocin,
you know, the love hormone.
And secondly, hugs lower
blood pressure and heart rate.
They boost your immune system.
And hugs improve your mood.
They improve social connections.
And they reduce your loneliness.
It's almost like we should
be hugging on a daily basis.
But wait, I've done the research for you.
And it turns out we do
need hugs on a daily basis.
Now, according to the Google research,
which makes me an expert, as you know,
we need four hugs a day just to survive,
eight hugs for just regular maintenance,
and 12 hugs a day for growth.
Again, the more you know.
Okay, today's quotes,
one fun nostalgic quote,
and then a second quote
to tease our book review
later in the episode.
Hopefully, one of these
quotes will speak to you today
and jumpstart your day
in a positive direction.
The first quote is from
Morgan Freeman, who said,
never let pride be
your guiding principle.
Let your accomplishments speak for you.
End quote.
And too often we get too caught up
in what other people think about us
and trying to control that narrative.
When we have no control
over what others think.
But you do have control over your life,
over what you do with it.
So focus on that and the
rest will take care of itself.
And today's teaser quote
from the book review is,
men must be taught as
if you taught them not,
and things unknown
proposed as things forgot.
Now, as usual, we'll unpack
that one here in just a minute
during the book review segment.
But first, let's jump
into our usual dose of fun
and historic facts
from this day in history.
Now, today's news facts and
birthdays are for February 12th.
In 1809, British
naturalist Charles Darwin,
who developed the theory of
evolution by natural selection,
he was born.
Also born in the same year
of 1809, Abraham Lincoln,
he was born near Hodginville, Kentucky.
Then in 1909, the National Association
for Advancement of Colored People,
it was founded in the US.
The NAACP is one of the oldest
and most influential
civil rights organizations
in the United States.
Then in 1934, American
basketball player, Bill Russell,
he was born.
He was one of the
greatest centers in NBA history,
and he was the first black coach
of a major
professional American sports team,
the Boston Celtics.
Then in 1982, Wayne Gretzky,
he scored his 153rd point of the season,
which broke the NHL record at the time.
In 1994, you might remember this,
thieves broke into the
National Gallery in Oslo,
and they stole the scream.
That's that iconic
painting that you know,
we all know so well by Edward Munch.
Actually, it was won in a series of four,
and it was recovered
several months later.
Then in 1999, US President Bill Clinton,
he was acquitted by the
Senate in his impeachment trial.
All right, happy birthday
if today is your birthday.
You share a birthday with Arsenio Hall.
He turned 69 today.
In the voice of Thanos,
Josh Brolin, he's 56 today.
And Christina Ricci, she's 45.
Now, the number one
song on this date in 1991
was "Gonna Make You
Sweat, Everybody Dance Now"
by CNC Music Factory.
You would remember the
beginning of this song
as it starts off fast with the singing
everybody dance now lyric,
followed by the music dropping in.
It's been featured in many
movies and many TV shows,
including three times on "The Office."
One of them was when
Michael Scott plays the song
through an air vent to
entice employees upstairs
to visit his new dance club cafe.
Well, the song held the number one spot
for five weeks in 1990, and
then again for two more weeks,
including this date in 1991.
And the number one
movie on this date in 1990
was "Driving Miss Daisy,"
starring Jessica Tandy,
Morgan Freeman, and Dan Aykroyd.
And it's a movie that
touched on racism and aging,
and it won four Academy Awards,
including Best Actress and Best Picture.
Interestingly, Morgan
Freeman reprised his role
for the movie, playing the same character
in the original off-Broadway production.
Freeman was nominated for Best Actor,
but he lost out to Daniel Day-Lewis
for his role in "My Left Foot,"
which I've never even heard of.
Okay, well, let's move on to some
personal growth here
in the book review
segment of "Morning Serial."
This is where we take a few moments
to reflect on lessons learned
from the current book we're reading.
Currently, we're reading
through Dale Carnegie's
"How to Win Friends
and Influence People."
It's a timeless book that is consistently
in all the must-read lists,
and it's packed with
rock-solid advice and actions
for all of us to use
and build healthy
foundational concepts to live by.
Yesterday, we finished up chapter one,
entitled "You Can't Win an Argument."
And we learned
Carnegie's principle number one,
which is the only way to
get the best of an argument
is to avoid it.
And Carnegie made the point
that there are no winners in an argument
because much of the time,
you haven't changed the
other person's position,
and you definitely haven't
made a friend out of them.
Use it as an opportunity
that you can learn from
and decide if it even really matters
to engage in an argument.
If it will only make you feel better
and negatively affect your own
credibility and character,
then use some of the
tools that we discussed
to move through and past that situation.
Which brings us to today.
And today we begin
chapter two of part two,
which is entitled "How to Win People to
Your Way of Thinking."
And the second chapter in this section,
which we are beginning today,
is entitled "A Sure Way of Making Enemies
and How to Avoid It."
Carnegie begins this
chapter by asking the reader
how often they feel they are correct.
And apparently, Theodore
Roosevelt had hoped to be correct
about 75% of the time.
And he is considered one of
the most distinguished men
of the 20th century.
So for you or I, and
Carnegie includes himself in this,
he asks if maybe being
correct 55% of the time
is reasonable to think that we are right.
And maybe those odds
are okay on Wall Street,
but Carnegie asks if we're only right
some percentage of
the time as low as 55%,
then should we really be
telling people they are wrong?
That's like taking advice
on how to shoot free throws
from Shaquille O'Neal.
And I love you Shaq.
But Carnegie is suggesting probably not.
And be aware that this is not just with
words that we speak.
And Carnegie says that we
can tell people they are wrong,
quote, "by a look or an
intonation or a gesture
just as eloquently as you
can in words," end quote.
If you've been with us
through Carnegie's book review,
you know that Carnegie is going to say
that you're not gonna
make a friend out of someone
who you are telling
them that they are wrong,
because you are striking a direct blow
at their intelligence and therefore
not making them feel important.
You're putting them on the defense
and they'll want to strike back.
All this and you won't
even have changed their mind.
Carnegie says to never
approach a conversation
by telling someone that you are going
to prove something to them.
It's saying, I'm smarter than you.
I'm going to make you change your mind.
And they are immediately
going to be mentally preparing
to go to battle with
you even before you begin.
Carnegie makes the
point that it's hard enough
to change people's minds when we do,
and that we are only
handicapping ourselves
or making it harder for
ourselves by beginning
from the somewhat
combative starting point.
Instead, Carnegie suggests,
if you are going to
try and prove something,
then don't let others
know it from the get-go.
Carnegie says, quote, "Do
it so subtly, so droitly
that no one will feel that
you are doing it," end quote.
Here, Carnegie provides a few quotes
throughout history
that support his thesis.
Alexander Pope, who said, quote,
"Men must be taught as
if you taught them not,
and things unknown proposed
as things forgot," end quote.
And Galileo said of
this 400 years ago, quote,
"You cannot teach a man anything.
You can only help him find it within
himself," end quote.
And Lord Chesterfield
said this to his son, quote,
"Be wiser than other people if you can,
but do not tell them so," end quote.
And lastly, Socrates often
said to his followers, quote,
"One thing only I know,
and that is that I
know nothing," end quote.
Carnegie says that he's not
wiser than any of these men
who all knew the
tribulations of trying to teach people.
So Carnegie said he quit
telling people they are wrong.
And there's a rub there, right?
Carnegie's not saying
we can't inform people
that they may be wrong,
even if we know we're 100% right.
But he is saying the way we
go about it has an art to it.
This is how Carnegie suggests opening up
that kind of conversation, quote,
"Well, now look, I thought
otherwise, but I might be wrong.
I frequently am, and if I'm
wrong, I want to put it right.
Let's examine the facts," end quote.
Carnegie says that
there's magic in those words
and nobody is ever going to
object to us saying, quote,
"I might be wrong. Let's
examine the facts," end quote.
Well, we almost went
through an entire segment
without a classic Carnegie story.
So we'll end on this short one today.
A customer service agent
working at a car dealership
often found himself in
difficult conversations
that came to a boil.
And he himself had become
callous towards the customers,
which caused loss of
business and general unpleasantness.
So the customer service rep
decided to change his approach
and instead open up his
conversations like this, quote,
"Our dealership has made so many mistakes
that I am frequently ashamed.
We may have erred in your case as well.
Tell me about it," end quote.
As you might expect, this approach
disarmed the upset patrons and they
became more receptive
after they had told their story.
Carnegie says this, quote,
"You will never get into trouble
by admitting that you may be wrong.
That will stop all
argument and inspire your opponent
to be just as fair and open and
broad-minded as you are.
It will make him want to admit that he
too may be wrong," end quote.
Well, we'll end there
today, but remember,
there's a lot to be said
and gained for those of us
that can put ego and pride aside in how
we deal with people.
Well, what day is it, people?
It's not hump day today. It's hug day.
And remember, you
need at least 12 to grow,
so you better get on hugging.
Come back tomorrow as
Carnegie tells us a story
about what happens when you tell us
a Supreme Court justice he's wrong.
Thanks for joining us
today and have a fantastic day.
Don't forget to follow and subscribe to
the Morning Serial
podcast on the One Life
Live It channel.
You can find more episodes and videos by
visiting our YouTube channel and the
website at seaningless
and at seaningless.com, where you can
also follow our other
podcast, the Mr. and Mrs.
Inglis podcast and the
Life Happens podcast.
In these other podcasts, we'll dive
deeper into everyday issues,
self-improvement and
well-being, business and finance, and we
welcome special guests too.
So join us.
It'll be a good time, I promise.
Thanks again for listening.
Have a fantastic day and
we'll see you tomorrow.