1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,045 being a musician and singer, I have great admiration 2 00:00:04,045 --> 00:00:07,048 for people like a mechanic. 3 00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:09,050 Is that a carpenter? No. 4 00:00:09,050 --> 00:00:12,345 If I were a carpenter and you were a lady, 5 00:00:12,762 --> 00:00:15,765 I'd marry you anyway. 6 00:00:16,224 --> 00:00:16,725 Right. 7 00:00:16,725 --> 00:00:21,062 I'll tell you sometimes some of the best conversations are when we're off. 8 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:22,439 Oh, we're on camera now. 9 00:00:22,439 --> 00:00:24,149 Oh, right. 10 00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:27,777 Hey, welcome to another edition of What's Good with John and Joyce, 11 00:00:27,944 --> 00:00:29,988 available on all the streaming platforms. 12 00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:32,741 I'd like to say a big thank you to all of our sponsors. 13 00:00:32,741 --> 00:00:35,577 Woodwinds, wedding and special events, venue and Sylvio. 14 00:00:35,577 --> 00:00:39,247 Sources the woodwinds.com ascend bank. 15 00:00:39,581 --> 00:00:41,374 They don't just see your accounts. 16 00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:44,002 They see your vision and ambitions. 17 00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:48,256 Ascend dot bank Moonshots, a vegan based company 18 00:00:48,256 --> 00:00:53,344 that delivers the highest quality organic juices, coffee bowls and so much more. 19 00:00:53,678 --> 00:00:55,930 Drink moonshots.com. 20 00:00:55,930 --> 00:00:57,724 Linda Toscano of Coldwell Banker 21 00:00:57,724 --> 00:01:01,644 Realty in Guilford, Connecticut, with over 17 years of experience. 22 00:01:01,644 --> 00:01:03,354 Linda is known for her authentic, 23 00:01:03,354 --> 00:01:06,900 client focused approach and expert guidance for buyers and sellers. 24 00:01:07,317 --> 00:01:08,276 Now, if you're thinking about 25 00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:11,696 making a move, Linda Toscano is someone you can trust. 26 00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:15,325 We're deeply grateful to all of our sponsors for their support 27 00:01:15,325 --> 00:01:16,201 and for partnering 28 00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:20,330 with us to uplift and enrich the lives of our listeners and viewers. 29 00:01:20,580 --> 00:01:23,958 I'm John Cadillac Seville from iHeart radio and John Seville Entertainment. 30 00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:25,418 And you? 31 00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:28,421 I'm Joyce Logan, and I'm going to tell you what I'm grateful for. 32 00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:30,173 Yeah. What are you grateful for today, Joyce? 33 00:01:30,173 --> 00:01:31,257 You're going to be grateful for it. 34 00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:34,886 I'm grateful that I got a tax return. 35 00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:38,556 And I love my CPA Dave to Dave. 36 00:01:38,556 --> 00:01:39,099 Dave. 37 00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:42,769 That sounds like a really hip hop name Dave the bass Dave the bass. 38 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:45,647 Like Sir mix a lot. Right. Right right. 39 00:01:45,647 --> 00:01:45,855 Yeah. 40 00:01:45,855 --> 00:01:49,692 Database is, you know, Patti and I, Richard Deuce, thanks to you to him. 41 00:01:49,692 --> 00:01:51,694 And he's also helping us out as well. 42 00:01:51,694 --> 00:01:54,489 You kind of like our, our official account, isn't he? 43 00:01:54,489 --> 00:01:56,157 When you say he's mine. 44 00:01:56,157 --> 00:02:00,787 Well, he's big o, you know, and he's be is becoming ours as well. Yes. 45 00:02:00,829 --> 00:02:03,373 I want to do a show that's not even a Dave Dave bass. 46 00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:06,167 We do, we do. That's what's good today. 47 00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:08,253 And of course, we have our moonshots. Coffee. 48 00:02:08,253 --> 00:02:10,713 You know, I had my moonshots coffee a little bit earlier, 49 00:02:10,713 --> 00:02:12,465 and we'd like to thank him and all of our sponsors. 50 00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:16,094 We're so grateful for, but very grateful for this gentleman who's in the studio, 51 00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:19,639 talking about overcoming adversity and challenges 52 00:02:19,889 --> 00:02:23,977 and battling, you know, demons, addictions, and let's face everything. 53 00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:28,940 And the thing is, every one of us has an addiction to something, right? 54 00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:32,235 And, you know, my addiction is peanut butter, but this is. 55 00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:35,780 But, you know, whatever it may be, but it all comes from the same place. 56 00:02:35,780 --> 00:02:37,574 But to be more serious about this. 57 00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:39,367 I really admire this man in so many ways. 58 00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:43,830 Such a talented singer, great musician with a band called The Mediums 59 00:02:44,205 --> 00:02:44,789 and they're awesome. 60 00:02:44,789 --> 00:02:48,251 Does the best version of I Put a Spell on You I've ever heard, ever heard. 61 00:02:48,251 --> 00:02:51,254 But Joyce, you won't have the honor of introducing this amazing man. 62 00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:54,257 Well, you know, I'm going to 63 00:02:54,257 --> 00:02:57,427 touch upon this because the whole show is not going to be about this. 64 00:02:57,427 --> 00:03:00,013 Yeah, but, 65 00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:02,932 Wait, did you say Frank Annunciato. 66 00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:04,767 So how did you meet Frank? 67 00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:06,936 I know his brother Sal. To who? 68 00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:09,939 Who's just a phenomenal human being as well. 69 00:03:10,064 --> 00:03:14,777 But we kind of met through, you know, Facebook, Instagram, reputation. 70 00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:19,073 Actually, I don't remember this, but I was a common ground. 71 00:03:19,782 --> 00:03:21,159 We met, we were over it. 72 00:03:21,159 --> 00:03:23,745 I was by the creamer area. 73 00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:24,495 I swear to you. 74 00:03:24,495 --> 00:03:27,165 Wow. You were like, good morning and open up. 75 00:03:27,165 --> 00:03:28,625 But, you know, we were like, oh, we have a blessed day. 76 00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:31,085 And I'm like, this dude, he got something going on. 77 00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:34,923 And I did a little research and I think I might have text you or said 78 00:03:35,256 --> 00:03:37,383 something about your show or something like that, and we just clicked. 79 00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:41,221 Yeah, we did, we did, and we met and we had coffee at moonshots after that. 80 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,890 And this story, you actually felt this energy? 81 00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:44,557 Absolutely. 82 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:47,602 I did as I did back in 83. 83 00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:48,770 Joy Joyce. Wow. 84 00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:51,731 Uncle John is a power of positivity. You could feel it. Yeah. 85 00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:53,233 He has sunshine and above, 86 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:56,861 like, message in a bottle of the police. 87 00:03:56,861 --> 00:03:57,862 Right. Okay. Yeah. 88 00:03:57,862 --> 00:03:58,238 All right. 89 00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:01,908 But, when I, when John told me you work, you were coming on, 90 00:04:02,325 --> 00:04:05,328 and I thought, oh, I know that name. 91 00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:08,915 So my father had a gas station at Fairhaven 92 00:04:09,457 --> 00:04:12,126 and Ferry Street. 93 00:04:12,126 --> 00:04:13,044 Yeah. 94 00:04:13,044 --> 00:04:16,047 And I remember stories. 95 00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:19,050 I just remember Mitch Reynolds. 96 00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:20,385 Mitch Reynolds. Yeah. 97 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:24,722 And that he was, a snazzy dresser and 98 00:04:25,139 --> 00:04:30,353 and and I could hear, like, my parents saying he looked like Edward G. 99 00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:31,604 Robinson. 100 00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:33,606 Is it 100% right? 101 00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:36,609 So he was well known. 102 00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:39,070 And then my sister said to me recently, 103 00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:41,823 she said, I'm going to send you some articles. 104 00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:43,616 It was like this. 105 00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:48,830 These articles that were like five, you know, like sections of it. 106 00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:49,998 And yeah. 107 00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:53,042 And it was and she wrote, I never knew 108 00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:56,796 we were like at the hub of the mom, though. 109 00:04:57,672 --> 00:04:59,799 Wow. Did not know that. 110 00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:02,176 Yeah. 111 00:05:02,176 --> 00:05:05,972 But they said, well, you know, so or not, your grandfather, that was my grandma. 112 00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:07,932 And you grew up with that? Yeah. 113 00:05:07,932 --> 00:05:09,809 You didn't even know that wasn't. 114 00:05:09,809 --> 00:05:11,853 No. Say normal. 115 00:05:11,853 --> 00:05:13,938 Well, yeah. 116 00:05:13,938 --> 00:05:16,149 You know, because you grew up in it. 117 00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:16,983 You sound like it was. 118 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:19,694 No, that's one thing we knew, you know, but, 119 00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:21,446 looking back on it, you know, obviously. 120 00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:22,447 Was it normal? 121 00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:27,702 You know, but it was classic, you know, pretty much classic. 122 00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:31,998 Like, you see, a movie was The Sopranos was a Goodfellas and was exactly that. 123 00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:35,126 You know, you growing up, you see all, you know, follow mobsters around. 124 00:05:35,126 --> 00:05:38,338 Or on Sundays, there's 50 people at your grandmother's 125 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:41,382 house, see meatballs and, and, you know. 126 00:05:41,424 --> 00:05:43,634 Yeah, a lot of that, a lot of that. 127 00:05:43,634 --> 00:05:47,388 But, you know, I got I want to put this out there because this is important. 128 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:48,139 You know, 129 00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:52,310 that whole lifestyle Sopranos godfather, 130 00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:55,438 you know, like, people were enthralled with that stuff. 131 00:05:55,938 --> 00:05:58,900 But if I'm being honest, it kind of ruined our lives. 132 00:05:59,233 --> 00:06:01,736 You know, I mean, 133 00:06:01,736 --> 00:06:04,072 it's it's it's hard to like, you know. 134 00:06:04,072 --> 00:06:04,364 Yeah. 135 00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:07,533 People like old school like my grandfather pretty much where, 136 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:10,453 you know, you, you live by the sword, you die by the sword. 137 00:06:10,453 --> 00:06:11,412 Yeah. 138 00:06:11,412 --> 00:06:13,456 You know, it's honor, it's loyalty. 139 00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:15,166 And that's what they chose. 140 00:06:15,166 --> 00:06:16,501 So they don't have a problem with it. 141 00:06:16,501 --> 00:06:20,505 You know, if if you come up missing, they're pretty much at peace with it. 142 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:22,715 But the family suffers. Yeah. 143 00:06:22,715 --> 00:06:24,050 My father died at 40. 144 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,594 Oh. From alcoholism. Drug addiction. Yeah. 145 00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:28,930 You know, is it just a very tough way of growing up? 146 00:06:28,930 --> 00:06:31,933 You know, but that, you know, people are kind of, like, 147 00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:35,353 enthralled with that whole thing where, like, you know, the bankroll. 148 00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:36,020 I mean, sure. 149 00:06:36,979 --> 00:06:38,356 Well, look at John Gotti. 150 00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:40,358 I mean, he was revered in his community. 151 00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:43,111 People. People loved the guy in his community. 152 00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:45,446 And you're and you watch a lot of these movies, too. 153 00:06:45,446 --> 00:06:47,698 And there's an honor. There's a code. 154 00:06:47,698 --> 00:06:49,325 It's like honor among thieves. 155 00:06:49,325 --> 00:06:50,159 And it's true. 156 00:06:50,159 --> 00:06:51,202 And, you know, listen, 157 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:55,206 I was talking to someone two days ago about it, and it's crazy. 158 00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:58,251 Is that lifestyle is, I have to say, the truth that, you know, 159 00:06:58,668 --> 00:07:01,504 there's there's not many people around like that anymore. 160 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:04,507 At least not around New Haven. Very few. 161 00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:08,344 But you know, those guys, that's what they lived for. 162 00:07:08,344 --> 00:07:10,346 It was about honor, loyalty. 163 00:07:10,346 --> 00:07:12,557 And no matter what, 164 00:07:12,557 --> 00:07:15,852 you know, you they're okay doing the crime, and they're okay 165 00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:19,480 with doing the time and whatever that consists of, even if it means death. 166 00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:21,983 That's what they take an honor for the oath. 167 00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:23,609 Well, you know, like, 168 00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:24,777 not many people around 169 00:07:24,777 --> 00:07:27,780 today are going to say like, okay, I'm going to go do 20 years in jail. 170 00:07:27,947 --> 00:07:29,157 Yeah. You know, I'm not. 171 00:07:29,157 --> 00:07:32,160 But they were doing, doing a lot of salacious things as they know, 172 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:35,580 but they still had a certain honor you know in their community. 173 00:07:35,705 --> 00:07:36,456 Yeah. Yeah. 174 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:37,623 Yeah absolutely. Yeah. 175 00:07:37,623 --> 00:07:38,875 You know that's the other thing too, 176 00:07:38,875 --> 00:07:41,461 I mean because guys like that my grandfather, 177 00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:44,547 if you go to the old schoolers in like Fair Haven and stuff, you know, 178 00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:47,717 he would give people jobs, you know, hand out money 179 00:07:48,009 --> 00:07:51,387 if someone was hurt and, you know, so that part of it is nice. 180 00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:53,681 But the other part of it is yes. 181 00:07:53,681 --> 00:07:56,601 You know, and our family suffered from mom. 182 00:07:56,601 --> 00:07:58,603 And then your grandfather went missing. 183 00:07:58,603 --> 00:07:59,770 We met in 1979. 184 00:07:59,770 --> 00:08:01,689 Disappeared just like you. Yes. 185 00:08:01,689 --> 00:08:04,567 You felt that he might have known. 186 00:08:04,567 --> 00:08:07,361 He was like oh, there's no that there's no doubt because he was drinking. 187 00:08:07,361 --> 00:08:09,780 I read that, yeah, he was that. 188 00:08:09,780 --> 00:08:11,949 He was talking too much, I think. 189 00:08:11,949 --> 00:08:12,825 Yeah, he was. Yeah. 190 00:08:12,825 --> 00:08:15,369 He was just, you know, he was a he was an alcoholic. 191 00:08:15,369 --> 00:08:15,661 Yeah. 192 00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:17,830 You know, and and, pardon me. 193 00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:19,749 Feels real bad for him, honestly. Yeah. 194 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:23,836 Just a, you know, just really, really sad life even growing up and everything else. 195 00:08:24,086 --> 00:08:28,132 So even my dad, my dad was 40 when he died, so, same thing. 196 00:08:28,966 --> 00:08:33,262 But, you know, it's just it's a it's a really tough lifestyle. 197 00:08:33,262 --> 00:08:35,598 And, I think that. 198 00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:36,307 Yeah, I think you're right. 199 00:08:36,307 --> 00:08:39,310 I think it it got to a point where, you know, 200 00:08:39,685 --> 00:08:42,271 he was just getting sloppy. 201 00:08:42,271 --> 00:08:42,605 Yeah. 202 00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:46,192 And after that when it was you know, it was and I think your grandmother too, 203 00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:50,780 because I think back in the day you accepted what your husband was doing. 204 00:08:51,155 --> 00:08:54,158 Honestly my grandmother was, was a saint and she was a classic. 205 00:08:54,158 --> 00:08:56,911 My boys, no matter what he did, she stood by him. 206 00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,079 She was. 207 00:08:58,079 --> 00:08:59,330 Yeah. And my mom too. 208 00:08:59,330 --> 00:09:01,249 Yeah, my mom too. And you know, 209 00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:04,418 it's I think that's part of it. 210 00:09:04,418 --> 00:09:07,838 You know, I don't want to make this all about mom today, but. 211 00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:12,301 Yeah, but no, but my I think the positive message is, is that, 212 00:09:12,843 --> 00:09:15,429 you know, that happened, 213 00:09:15,429 --> 00:09:20,101 but most people from that family and, you know, when, 214 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:24,146 when you grow up in a family like that, the old classic mobsters, 215 00:09:24,146 --> 00:09:27,650 they see the three grandsons and they think, oh my God, they had lotto. 216 00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:28,776 They'll carry on the name, 217 00:09:28,776 --> 00:09:31,654 you know, me and my brothers got completely away from that. 218 00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:32,863 And that's a success. 219 00:09:32,863 --> 00:09:34,282 That's a that's a victory. 220 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:35,658 Now tell us about that, Frankie. 221 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:38,160 That's great because you've had this adversity. 222 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:39,495 You've had this family situation. 223 00:09:39,495 --> 00:09:41,414 You said that really destroyed the family in many ways. 224 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,624 But there is a silver lining. 225 00:09:43,624 --> 00:09:48,838 You've been able to overcome a lot and you've had your personal demons big time. 226 00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:50,089 Yeah. I'm recovering heroin addict. 227 00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:54,969 And I started very young, partying, drinking and drug and cocaine in the 80s. 228 00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:56,178 I was a maniac. 229 00:09:56,178 --> 00:09:59,473 And then it got to a point where I got addicted to pain pills. 230 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:03,811 And then here, when, you know, I don't know how much. 231 00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:07,857 I don't know a lot about too many things, but music and drug addiction, 232 00:10:08,190 --> 00:10:09,108 I know a lot about. 233 00:10:09,108 --> 00:10:10,067 And, you know, 234 00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:13,738 if you were to ask any heroin addict or someone who was addicted to opiates, 235 00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,490 I would 236 00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:19,869 bet that 80% of them started out with pain pills and operation. 237 00:10:20,202 --> 00:10:21,621 Yeah. You know, something like that. 238 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:25,750 I believe that, you know, I have a giant 239 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:30,296 generational addiction that runs in our family. 240 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:34,717 So, you know, I believe it's a disease I believe is just passed on to you. 241 00:10:34,842 --> 00:10:38,763 But when I had an operation, I, I got Percocet 242 00:10:38,804 --> 00:10:42,141 and pain pills, and it was from there, we just forget it. 243 00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:43,851 It was a nightmare. 244 00:10:43,851 --> 00:10:44,852 But that's how I started. 245 00:10:44,852 --> 00:10:46,562 And eventually I went to here 246 00:10:46,562 --> 00:10:49,065 and, you know, I don't know if you know how much you know 247 00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:53,235 about drug addiction, but the relapse rate for here in Texas, 90%. 90%. 248 00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:53,569 Yeah. 249 00:10:53,569 --> 00:10:56,864 Usually, like, you know, right after they get out, it's 90%. 250 00:10:56,864 --> 00:10:59,492 I think staying clean I think is like 70. 251 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:02,203 How many of those friends of yours are no longer with us? 252 00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:04,580 I literally dozens and dozens of obituaries. 253 00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:09,168 You know, the guys who so sad, you know, do it. 254 00:11:09,168 --> 00:11:13,631 And, you know, it's such a it's just it is a tender thing 255 00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:16,801 because, I my big thing is service. 256 00:11:17,718 --> 00:11:20,179 I, I stay clean, not. 257 00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:22,723 I believe in a higher power, which I choose to call God. 258 00:11:22,723 --> 00:11:26,519 But besides that, I believe the only way of, of of keeping 259 00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:27,937 is giving up, giving it away. 260 00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:29,605 So my big thing is service. 261 00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:34,485 And, you know, it's heartbreaking, what I see on a daily, 262 00:11:34,485 --> 00:11:36,404 I just be refreshed in a month and a half ago. 263 00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,656 And I went to a meeting with them day before, 264 00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:42,660 so it's it's a really tough thing. 265 00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:47,248 I what I try to tell people because it gets really, really touchy. 266 00:11:47,331 --> 00:11:50,209 I don't know if you know anything about Alcoholics Anonymous. 267 00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:54,547 I sure do, but when you go into Alcoholics Anonymous, you know, 268 00:11:55,089 --> 00:11:59,343 you choose to, you know, your goal is to find some type of higher power. 269 00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:02,596 You know, it doesn't have to be mine. 270 00:12:02,596 --> 00:12:03,889 It when you're starting off, it doesn't. 271 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:07,017 That's the big message, honestly, that I want to tell for some reason today. 272 00:12:07,309 --> 00:12:10,479 Because as much as I believe in what I believe in and boy, 273 00:12:10,479 --> 00:12:12,398 do I believe in what I do. Amen. 274 00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:16,902 But when you first come out of a detox or a rehab or whatever, 275 00:12:17,278 --> 00:12:20,281 the concept kind of is puzzling to people. 276 00:12:20,281 --> 00:12:21,198 So, you know, 277 00:12:21,198 --> 00:12:24,702 if you know anything about the 12 step in 2012 steps and 12 traditions, 278 00:12:25,327 --> 00:12:28,539 it says you choose a higher power, whatever that is. 279 00:12:28,539 --> 00:12:29,290 It could be 280 00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:32,752 God group of drunks. 281 00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:35,254 It could be, wow, I never heard that acronym before. 282 00:12:35,254 --> 00:12:36,881 God group of drunks. 283 00:12:36,881 --> 00:12:40,384 It could be, you know, and then most of the time they'll find. 284 00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:43,053 Right? Yeah. 285 00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:45,931 I think the big thing is, as much as I believe in what I believe in, 286 00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:49,143 and there is no questioning what I believe in, let me just put that out there. 287 00:12:49,518 --> 00:12:50,770 It's important. 288 00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:54,106 That's a very important thing, because a lot of newcomers get afraid 289 00:12:54,482 --> 00:12:56,650 when they hear the God thing. 290 00:12:56,650 --> 00:13:00,237 If feel like God is going to be so judgmental and and keeping the record and 291 00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:03,574 and that's the other thing, you know, like a lot I hear a lot of people say, 292 00:13:03,824 --> 00:13:07,119 you know, when they come in, you know, 293 00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:10,873 I was raised with that punishing God, you know, you know, the Old Testament God. 294 00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:13,083 Right? Of of what? 295 00:13:13,083 --> 00:13:16,337 You know, to me, to me, God is love, right? 296 00:13:17,087 --> 00:13:20,174 What happens if someone comes in and they're an atheist? 297 00:13:20,716 --> 00:13:22,593 They just don't believe in anything, but. 298 00:13:22,593 --> 00:13:24,929 So they can still find something great? 299 00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:27,473 Absolutely, absolutely. 300 00:13:27,473 --> 00:13:28,724 Whatever works. 301 00:13:28,724 --> 00:13:31,060 Yeah. Whatever works. You know what I mean? 302 00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:33,187 There's a classic story I heard, whether it's true or not, 303 00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:35,731 I don't know, but, there was a girl named. 304 00:13:35,731 --> 00:13:36,482 I wonder what it is. 305 00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:39,318 I'm not hundreds, but dozens of rehabs in detox as well. 306 00:13:39,318 --> 00:13:42,321 It took me a long time to get clean time, 307 00:13:42,446 --> 00:13:45,825 like 12 years in and out, in a long time to get clean time. 308 00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:48,244 A month, two months. 309 00:13:48,244 --> 00:13:52,456 Yeah, a year, you know, and a lot of that and a lot of setbacks. 310 00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:53,707 Lot of setbacks. 311 00:13:53,707 --> 00:13:56,919 You know, the big thing about alcohol and drugs is, 312 00:13:57,169 --> 00:14:00,172 you know, you get a couple weeks clean or whatever. 313 00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:02,466 And then all of a sudden, you know, 314 00:14:02,466 --> 00:14:04,426 I used to think, oh my God, what am I going to do? Drugs. 315 00:14:04,426 --> 00:14:06,011 What could go wrong? Well life happens. 316 00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:10,307 Yes, yes, yes, marriage, your children, your finances. 317 00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:12,017 You know, it gets rough and 318 00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:15,479 a lot of people get really, really nervous and they're like, I can't take it. 319 00:14:15,479 --> 00:14:16,897 And they go, they retreat. 320 00:14:16,897 --> 00:14:17,690 They retreat back. 321 00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:18,315 Yeah. 322 00:14:18,315 --> 00:14:19,900 But, you know, yes, 323 00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:23,988 you could find whatever it is, you know, whatever it is, you know, group of drunks. 324 00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:25,698 That. 325 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:29,827 Anyway, I going to say, yeah, there's a classic story of a woman who, was in, 326 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:33,873 a rehab, and there was a life coach there, and, 327 00:14:34,039 --> 00:14:36,876 they were talking about a higher power, and this woman was like, I, 328 00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:38,961 I don't want to hear anything about a higher power. 329 00:14:38,961 --> 00:14:41,964 And she says, I'm going to make my. 330 00:14:43,632 --> 00:14:44,425 Say, you know. 331 00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:46,302 Yeah, I don't want no part of this. Yeah. Right. 332 00:14:46,302 --> 00:14:48,637 Right. And then, 333 00:14:48,637 --> 00:14:51,640 she decided to use and she went down the ghetto, 334 00:14:52,182 --> 00:14:55,185 and she went down to cover, 335 00:14:55,603 --> 00:14:59,356 the drug dealer and, you know, showing that. 336 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,692 Showing me that God does have a sense of humor. 337 00:15:01,692 --> 00:15:04,695 You know, that's just what I'm saying is, you're absolutely right. 338 00:15:04,695 --> 00:15:06,614 It does not have to be my God. 339 00:15:06,614 --> 00:15:10,993 And and as much as my faith is solid as ever, 340 00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:14,121 I think that's really important for people to come into the rooms. 341 00:15:14,121 --> 00:15:15,706 I really do. 342 00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:17,291 They'll find what they need to for sure. 343 00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,460 What I believe in or you believe in. Yeah. 344 00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:22,671 You know, and honestly, I hope he doesn't mind me saying this. 345 00:15:22,671 --> 00:15:28,218 My brother Sal, he has, I think 38 years come and good for him. 346 00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:32,348 He takes something from Jesus, something from Buddha, 347 00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:35,726 something, you know, he combines everything, right? 348 00:15:35,851 --> 00:15:36,769 That works for him. 349 00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,270 It works for him. And I respect that. 350 00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:41,231 He works for him as a wonderful priest that we love. 351 00:15:41,231 --> 00:15:44,610 Father, in the dark night, when I had in one of my books, 352 00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:47,363 I had quotes from Buddha and. 353 00:15:47,363 --> 00:15:49,573 Yeah. And I asked him, I said, you have a problem with that? 354 00:15:49,573 --> 00:15:50,699 And he says, why would I? 355 00:15:50,699 --> 00:15:51,909 Yeah, Buddha. 356 00:15:51,909 --> 00:15:54,203 That's right, that's that's right. 357 00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:55,788 You know, like it. 358 00:15:55,788 --> 00:16:00,459 You know, drug addiction, alcoholism is, you know, the end result is death. 359 00:16:00,668 --> 00:16:03,504 They say three things jails, institution and death. 360 00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:05,339 You know, I've been in both. 361 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:06,882 The only thing left for me was death. 362 00:16:06,882 --> 00:16:10,052 So, you know, like, this is serious. 363 00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:11,345 This is life and death. 364 00:16:11,345 --> 00:16:14,890 If you believe in that window blinding to make your higher power 365 00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:17,226 to get you started. Right. 366 00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:21,271 My big thing is I'm not really one of those people who got it to kind of 367 00:16:21,271 --> 00:16:24,525 like pushes things and people don't want to be pushed 368 00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:27,319 because they'll just, you know, they'll go into a cocoon. Yes, yes. 369 00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:30,823 So I believe in you know, I just tell a lot of people, man, you need 370 00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:34,785 you can't stay clean and sober, you know, shut the blinds and, you know, 371 00:16:34,785 --> 00:16:35,661 shake it all day. 372 00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:36,370 Yeah. Get out. 373 00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:39,498 Move a muscle right before you got addicted. 374 00:16:39,623 --> 00:16:41,959 Yeah. You know, stuff like that. You can't wallow in self-pity. 375 00:16:41,959 --> 00:16:44,420 No, not only that, but you're going to find your own journey. 376 00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:45,671 Their journeys and my journey. 377 00:16:45,671 --> 00:16:46,213 That's right. 378 00:16:46,213 --> 00:16:48,257 My brother Sal and me. 379 00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:50,467 My journey is completely different. 380 00:16:50,467 --> 00:16:52,344 But my brother Sal went away. 381 00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:55,514 He went away for two weeks, and I would, if I was a millionaire, I would bet 382 00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:57,516 $1 million he wouldn't stay clean for one day. 383 00:16:57,516 --> 00:16:58,726 Never went back out. 384 00:16:58,726 --> 00:17:00,436 Wow, eight years I did. Yes. 385 00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:02,479 Yeah, me. It took me. 386 00:17:02,479 --> 00:17:04,189 Yeah. Thousands and thousands of detoxes. 387 00:17:04,189 --> 00:17:07,067 I mean, everybody who I knew said this kid's going to die. 388 00:17:07,067 --> 00:17:07,651 Yeah. 389 00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:11,238 You know, I was a I have no problem saying I was a stone cold junkie here 390 00:17:11,238 --> 00:17:13,949 when I was shooting dope on my feet. I was a maniac. 391 00:17:13,949 --> 00:17:16,410 And now look at you. You're here. You're serving others. 392 00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:17,661 There's a joy to you. 393 00:17:17,661 --> 00:17:20,748 You're out there entertaining with your with the mediums and, you know, 394 00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:23,834 just adding so much value to everybody you meet. 395 00:17:24,168 --> 00:17:25,044 Always sing. 396 00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:26,670 Did you know I did? 397 00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:28,839 My brother Sal was my mentor, my hero. 398 00:17:28,839 --> 00:17:31,842 He, He he he plays guitar. 399 00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:34,219 When we were young, we used to harmonize Simon and Garfunkel. 400 00:17:34,219 --> 00:17:36,889 Oh, yeah, a giant Beatles fan. 401 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:39,892 So, we would, do Beatles and, 402 00:17:40,601 --> 00:17:44,146 and I started, got my first little garage band at 15. 403 00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,522 I was playing bars at 16. 404 00:17:45,522 --> 00:17:49,777 Wow. So it's been a long journey, but it's my passion, you know, now 405 00:17:49,943 --> 00:17:50,736 and where I'm at. 406 00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:54,031 And I'm really a piece of where I'm at when I go play a gig. 407 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,992 It's, like, therapeutic for me. Wow. 408 00:17:56,992 --> 00:18:00,496 You know, I just wanted to say, because I know some people who will say, 409 00:18:00,871 --> 00:18:02,706 you can just give up drinking. 410 00:18:02,706 --> 00:18:03,207 You could just. 411 00:18:03,207 --> 00:18:04,750 You could just do that. 412 00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:06,585 And I always said it's a disease. 413 00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:09,213 Some people say, no, it's not. It's a choice. 414 00:18:09,213 --> 00:18:14,760 But I heard a doctor say this, that think of it as taking 415 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:20,599 a whole box of ex-lax and then being told, you can't go to the bathroom. 416 00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:25,270 And that's what it feels like to a lot of people who are gifted 417 00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:26,897 where they need that. 418 00:18:26,897 --> 00:18:27,773 Yeah they have to. 419 00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:30,442 Your body is crying out for it. Yeah. 420 00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:33,529 So with your singing and focusing on 421 00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:36,615 that does that shift it. 422 00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:36,949 Yeah. 423 00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:40,786 You know something really special happened with this with this medium's thing. 424 00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,538 You know, when I first got, 425 00:18:42,538 --> 00:18:46,458 when I first got clean, the partner that I have now has been for 25 years, 426 00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:50,379 3 or 4000 shows. 427 00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:52,464 I just want to get back into music. 428 00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:55,467 What a really special thing happened, you know, just by 429 00:18:55,926 --> 00:18:59,805 honestly, just by willing it and keeping on playing and playing and playing, 430 00:19:00,013 --> 00:19:03,892 we started getting this popularity, and now we have a family of people 431 00:19:04,184 --> 00:19:06,603 that follow us and they become family. 432 00:19:06,603 --> 00:19:10,315 So when I and also we're good, we are really good. 433 00:19:10,649 --> 00:19:14,278 And when I see people come to see us and I see the joy they, 434 00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:17,489 you know, some people playing their calendars around us, 435 00:19:17,531 --> 00:19:20,450 you know, some people say, oh my God, since we met you, we never went out. 436 00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:22,369 And there these are people in their 50s, 60s. 437 00:19:22,369 --> 00:19:25,372 They say we played our whole, you know, like, wow, what a compliment, 438 00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:26,248 what a compliment. 439 00:19:26,248 --> 00:19:28,959 And, you know, they get through, you know, it's a tough world out there. 440 00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:32,671 They get three hours of escapism and you need it, you know. 441 00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:34,673 So that's a really special thing happened. 442 00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:36,175 But for me it's therapeutic now. 443 00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:40,220 I mean this is but I got to be honest, it took a very long time. 444 00:19:40,387 --> 00:19:41,805 Like the guy you see here 445 00:19:41,805 --> 00:19:44,808 is not the guy you're what it's all like even 15, 20 years ago, 446 00:19:44,808 --> 00:19:49,062 you know, and and if there's any message I want to, I want to bring to anybody 447 00:19:49,062 --> 00:19:52,065 who is struggling with addiction or anything is that 448 00:19:52,482 --> 00:19:55,485 if you don't, if you don't quit. 449 00:19:55,819 --> 00:19:58,071 And everybody say to me, when I was in and out, 450 00:19:58,071 --> 00:20:01,408 you always quit before the miracle happens. Yes. 451 00:20:01,783 --> 00:20:03,160 It was so true. 452 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:06,163 So yeah, how many people are there on the fringe of something 453 00:20:06,496 --> 00:20:08,707 and they just quit and other almost. 454 00:20:08,707 --> 00:20:10,584 They're at the finish line. 455 00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:13,503 And I'm going to tell you another thing, Joyce, what you said 456 00:20:13,503 --> 00:20:17,841 I was for years very uncomfortable with being clean. 457 00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:19,426 Like I would get a month or two. 458 00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:23,597 And I remember during that month or two I would get a new job or something, 459 00:20:23,805 --> 00:20:27,309 and I could remember being in my car crying, going, 460 00:20:27,351 --> 00:20:29,061 I feel like a fish out of water. 461 00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,020 I don't feel right. 462 00:20:30,020 --> 00:20:32,731 And eventually I would go use because I couldn't take it. 463 00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:35,734 Yeah, yeah, if you could just hang in there 464 00:20:35,859 --> 00:20:38,904 and do what you gotta do, whatever it is, whether it's meetings, 465 00:20:38,904 --> 00:20:41,990 whether it's church, whether it's finding God and finding your higher 466 00:20:41,990 --> 00:20:44,993 power group of drunks, you know, whatever. 467 00:20:45,410 --> 00:20:49,623 And you could just get through that terrible, terrible 468 00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:53,377 feeling of like, you know, and your mind telling you you're not worthy. 469 00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:56,088 Yeah, of course I'll never do it. 470 00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:58,966 I'll die all that. You know, you always talk about positivity. 471 00:20:58,966 --> 00:21:01,510 And it's so important. So. 472 00:21:01,510 --> 00:21:04,638 Oh, 75% of what people think, especially first thing in the morning, is negative. 473 00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:07,349 So we have to fight that all the time. 474 00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:08,141 I get it, I get here. 475 00:21:08,141 --> 00:21:10,852 So might I share something with you? And this is true. 476 00:21:12,312 --> 00:21:13,772 You know, there's some people 477 00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:16,900 who get clean and it you know, there's maybe they're easier. 478 00:21:17,985 --> 00:21:20,988 Up until literally two weeks ago. 479 00:21:20,988 --> 00:21:23,699 And I've been coming around for decades. 480 00:21:23,699 --> 00:21:25,033 Every morning when I wake up. 481 00:21:25,033 --> 00:21:27,828 What you just said, it's very dark for me. 482 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:29,413 But here's a beautiful thing. 483 00:21:29,413 --> 00:21:31,832 The beautiful thing is, is I know what I need to do. 484 00:21:31,832 --> 00:21:34,334 And for me, not for anybody else. 485 00:21:34,334 --> 00:21:39,006 For me I get on my knees, I get my Bible, get my devotionals I get my prayers. 486 00:21:39,006 --> 00:21:41,842 Yeah I ask God for you know, his will not mine. 487 00:21:41,842 --> 00:21:42,759 All that. 488 00:21:42,759 --> 00:21:46,722 But I'm glad you brought that up because it's been a long time 489 00:21:46,722 --> 00:21:49,141 that I've been coming around and that's still happening. 490 00:21:49,141 --> 00:21:51,310 Funny thing happened about two weeks ago. 491 00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:53,979 I woke up and I had didn't have that darkness. 492 00:21:53,979 --> 00:21:56,523 Wow. What a healing. Maybe. 493 00:21:56,523 --> 00:21:58,984 Maybe that was God saying, I need you put through that 494 00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:01,903 so you can get to the other side of, you know, whatever it was. I'm not. 495 00:22:01,903 --> 00:22:04,698 Yeah, but I prayed stays. 496 00:22:04,698 --> 00:22:08,035 And if it doesn't, I know that I have the tools and I know what to do. 497 00:22:08,243 --> 00:22:08,452 Yeah. 498 00:22:08,452 --> 00:22:12,164 So I think the message there is is that you listen, if you're 499 00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:15,167 if you're trying this and you're trying to stay clean or whatever, 500 00:22:15,292 --> 00:22:20,047 if it's going to be tough, but if you hang in there, the miracle will happen. 501 00:22:20,088 --> 00:22:22,883 There's no doubt about you know, everything in life is a test. 502 00:22:22,883 --> 00:22:24,426 Y'all know the test of faith. 503 00:22:24,426 --> 00:22:24,843 No doubt. 504 00:22:24,843 --> 00:22:27,846 I really I have gone through one of the roughest years I've ever had 505 00:22:28,055 --> 00:22:30,140 this past year. Absolutely, absolutely. 506 00:22:30,140 --> 00:22:33,101 Some personal stuff that went on, some health stuff that went on. 507 00:22:33,310 --> 00:22:37,064 But the thing I won't do is given never, never. 508 00:22:37,064 --> 00:22:39,691 And I know that just like there's a darkness, 509 00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:41,735 whatever's in darkness comes to light, you know? 510 00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:43,445 So it's okay. Right? 511 00:22:43,445 --> 00:22:46,073 The other thing is, is it's probably the biggest year for my growth 512 00:22:47,157 --> 00:22:48,200 as far as humans. 513 00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,576 Because every day. 514 00:22:49,576 --> 00:22:52,454 Yeah. So you know, it's it's okay. 515 00:22:52,454 --> 00:22:55,415 Well well you growth comes from adversity no doubt. 516 00:22:55,415 --> 00:22:56,917 Right. Overcoming obstacles. 517 00:22:56,917 --> 00:23:00,420 Obstacles are opportunities no doubt I mean and I'm sure you heard, 518 00:23:00,420 --> 00:23:03,423 you know, trees grow in the valley. Yes. 519 00:23:03,590 --> 00:23:08,762 You know, so, for me, it's as much as there's pain and misery crying. 520 00:23:08,762 --> 00:23:12,682 Whatever it is, I've never felt more growth in my life. Wow. 521 00:23:12,766 --> 00:23:14,601 It's a really, really great thing. 522 00:23:14,601 --> 00:23:17,854 I just really have such a burden in my heart for what's going on. 523 00:23:17,896 --> 00:23:18,939 This will be an endemic. 524 00:23:18,939 --> 00:23:24,611 Yes. And and, you know, friends are dying and it's so, so sad. 525 00:23:24,611 --> 00:23:25,987 Yeah. So sad. 526 00:23:25,987 --> 00:23:30,325 I'm really looking into maybe become a life coach and, Oh that's right. 527 00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:31,952 Oh, gosh. 528 00:23:31,952 --> 00:23:32,285 Yeah. 529 00:23:32,285 --> 00:23:34,204 Joyce does a lot to help a lot of people as well. 530 00:23:34,204 --> 00:23:36,790 I know that you've been able to help so many people over the years 531 00:23:36,790 --> 00:23:40,544 in your practice, because I was, a little confused about the, 532 00:23:40,544 --> 00:23:43,713 the name, the group name, and maybe others wouldn't. 533 00:23:43,713 --> 00:23:48,885 When you say, or group of trunks, is that an actual organization? No. 534 00:23:48,885 --> 00:23:50,178 In other words, what I'm saying is it's like, 535 00:23:50,178 --> 00:23:51,680 you know, people do a lot of meetings. 536 00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:55,434 So that group of, oh, drug addicts group of, oh, I see anything, you know. 537 00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:57,477 Right. God. Just God. 538 00:23:57,477 --> 00:23:57,936 Right. 539 00:23:57,936 --> 00:24:01,690 So, you know, a lot of people use, the find that 540 00:24:01,690 --> 00:24:06,987 they use meetings as their higher power, just a positive right to be with drugs. 541 00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:09,114 Yeah, whatever it is. And, you know, my brother 542 00:24:10,323 --> 00:24:13,326 owns a, yoga studio. Yes. 543 00:24:13,785 --> 00:24:15,370 And he does recovery yoga. 544 00:24:15,370 --> 00:24:17,497 I think it's Tuesdays, but it's. 545 00:24:17,497 --> 00:24:19,124 And where's Ribbon's wing? Where's his business? 546 00:24:19,124 --> 00:24:21,126 And Branford, Connecticut. Movie theater. 547 00:24:21,126 --> 00:24:24,129 Yes, I do, right by the dance studio up in the second floor. 548 00:24:24,171 --> 00:24:26,715 Yeah, but anyway, his saying. 549 00:24:26,715 --> 00:24:29,301 And that is, everybody's recovering from something. 550 00:24:29,301 --> 00:24:31,344 Just like. Are we all. Yeah. 551 00:24:31,344 --> 00:24:31,970 Are we all? 552 00:24:31,970 --> 00:24:35,140 So that meeting that he has is not about 553 00:24:35,140 --> 00:24:38,226 alcoholics, drunks, it's about overeaters. 554 00:24:38,226 --> 00:24:41,396 It's about, you know, people who don't, you know, Michael Hall. 555 00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:41,897 Yeah. 556 00:24:41,897 --> 00:24:45,734 You know, so it's just not about, you know, it could be we're all recovering. 557 00:24:46,067 --> 00:24:47,486 Well, we sure are. 558 00:24:47,486 --> 00:24:47,986 So he that. 559 00:24:47,986 --> 00:24:50,989 And by the way, my brother sounded some credible. 560 00:24:51,114 --> 00:24:52,365 Incredible. 561 00:24:52,365 --> 00:24:54,117 He goes to inner city schools. 562 00:24:54,117 --> 00:24:55,785 I love the way you talk about your brother. 563 00:24:55,785 --> 00:24:57,370 I love that he really is. 564 00:24:57,370 --> 00:24:58,330 He's my mentor. He. 565 00:24:58,330 --> 00:25:00,540 You know, honestly, I don't if if it wasn't for him on 566 00:25:00,540 --> 00:25:01,833 if I'd be around man. 567 00:25:01,833 --> 00:25:07,172 And honestly at in 1997 I met him at Lenny's and I had cellulitis on my legs. 568 00:25:07,172 --> 00:25:08,089 I shoot on my legs 569 00:25:08,089 --> 00:25:11,635 and even he said, man, you're going to, you know, you're going to die, you know? 570 00:25:12,010 --> 00:25:15,597 But he was a great power of example and is still is. 571 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,849 Yeah. He lives in now. Tell me about the mediums. 572 00:25:17,849 --> 00:25:19,309 How did you get the name of the mediums? 573 00:25:19,309 --> 00:25:19,935 It's funny, was. 574 00:25:19,935 --> 00:25:22,062 No, you know, this this homelessness. 575 00:25:22,062 --> 00:25:24,856 It haunts us because everyone thinks the medium is old. 576 00:25:24,856 --> 00:25:27,108 And you're a and you're a duo. You're a duo. 577 00:25:27,108 --> 00:25:28,401 Duo, right. 578 00:25:29,444 --> 00:25:29,986 I thought it has 579 00:25:29,986 --> 00:25:32,989 something to do with that has nothing to do with that. Wow. 580 00:25:32,989 --> 00:25:35,200 Some people, I mean they go like, oh, you got to get a read our mind. 581 00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:38,411 To do with that, we started out 582 00:25:38,411 --> 00:25:42,249 in, 2001 as the happy medium well. 583 00:25:43,291 --> 00:25:45,460 And you're like, oh, I hate that. Right. 584 00:25:45,460 --> 00:25:49,297 And then I know myself or my partner Tom says, how about the mediums? 585 00:25:49,422 --> 00:25:50,507 That was it. Yeah. 586 00:25:50,507 --> 00:25:52,842 And then we got popular so we couldn't change it. 587 00:25:52,842 --> 00:25:55,512 Wow. Yeah, yeah. What other names did you think about? 588 00:25:55,512 --> 00:25:58,515 Oh, we had, we had one was called The Resentments. 589 00:26:00,350 --> 00:26:01,184 The resentments. 590 00:26:01,184 --> 00:26:04,187 Not not the happy resentments. 591 00:26:05,146 --> 00:26:06,356 Yeah. Yeah. 592 00:26:06,356 --> 00:26:08,108 But yeah, it's not going to be the end. 593 00:26:08,108 --> 00:26:12,028 Now we're we're, we're in a great, great place, so it's nice. 594 00:26:12,112 --> 00:26:14,322 It's nice. Yeah. Yeah. 595 00:26:14,322 --> 00:26:16,157 What? Music really helps you. 596 00:26:16,157 --> 00:26:17,325 Music is everything to me. 597 00:26:17,325 --> 00:26:18,410 Yeah. Music. Everything. 598 00:26:18,410 --> 00:26:20,412 You write your music, I we do. 599 00:26:20,412 --> 00:26:22,622 Tom and I, wrote a couple songs. 600 00:26:22,622 --> 00:26:24,666 Unfortunately, in this music business, 601 00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:27,460 people don't want to hear a lot of regionals. 602 00:26:27,460 --> 00:26:28,336 And it's sad. Yeah. 603 00:26:28,336 --> 00:26:30,463 Especially when you play clubs or restaurants. They want. 604 00:26:30,463 --> 00:26:31,756 They want covers. 605 00:26:31,756 --> 00:26:34,134 Or are these the owners of the restaurant prefer covers? 606 00:26:34,134 --> 00:26:34,759 Stars. 607 00:26:34,759 --> 00:26:36,886 They they don't want to hear their new music. 608 00:26:36,886 --> 00:26:38,847 Yeah. It's really it's really tough. It's really tough. 609 00:26:38,847 --> 00:26:42,559 So, you know we're going to incorporate I would love to do one more CD 610 00:26:42,642 --> 00:26:46,396 of originals with Tom, my partner, and I'm sure that'll happen, but, 611 00:26:46,396 --> 00:26:49,399 it's really tough, Joyce, to play originals all night long. 612 00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:51,776 You know, I could stick maybe one in here and there, you know, 613 00:26:51,776 --> 00:26:52,861 because people want familiar. 614 00:26:52,861 --> 00:26:54,821 Well, we're wired for familiarity. 615 00:26:54,821 --> 00:26:58,241 Even in the radio biz where I am, if we do play something new and unfamiliar, 616 00:26:58,366 --> 00:27:01,369 we have to surround it with familiar songs on both sides. 617 00:27:01,453 --> 00:27:05,498 It has to be sandwiched in between because you have to usher people into it 618 00:27:05,498 --> 00:27:06,583 or you've lost them. 619 00:27:06,583 --> 00:27:08,877 Hear it like a few times, right? 620 00:27:08,877 --> 00:27:09,336 Yeah. 621 00:27:09,336 --> 00:27:11,796 And the other thing is, is what we do with the duo. 622 00:27:11,796 --> 00:27:14,591 And the duo is 80% of of our shows. 623 00:27:14,591 --> 00:27:15,592 You know, 624 00:27:16,718 --> 00:27:17,469 we're we 625 00:27:17,469 --> 00:27:20,889 realize that we're background music, like, you know, just like you 626 00:27:20,889 --> 00:27:24,100 DJ I mean, yeah, you do parties at weddings, which that's the theme. 627 00:27:24,309 --> 00:27:28,521 But us, we're playing in restaurants and stuff and we're background music. 628 00:27:28,521 --> 00:27:30,315 Yeah. We're not too loud. 629 00:27:30,315 --> 00:27:33,318 You know, we try to put, we know hundreds and hundreds and hundreds 630 00:27:33,318 --> 00:27:36,279 of, songs, which I think separates us from a lot of you always. 631 00:27:36,529 --> 00:27:36,946 Sure. 632 00:27:36,946 --> 00:27:39,699 You know, I think maybe 580 songs. Wow. 633 00:27:39,699 --> 00:27:43,244 But we realize what our job is, and that's background music. 634 00:27:43,620 --> 00:27:44,913 You know, we don't have egos. 635 00:27:44,913 --> 00:27:47,040 If someone tells us. Yep. 636 00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,000 And I think that's why we're really successful. 637 00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:50,835 You know, I think that's so key. 638 00:27:50,835 --> 00:27:52,545 You keep your ego at the door. 639 00:27:52,545 --> 00:27:53,421 I think that's so cool. 640 00:27:53,421 --> 00:27:56,007 I've learned that the DJ business, too. It's not about me. 641 00:27:56,007 --> 00:27:58,093 It's about the people in front of me. Somebody comes up. 642 00:27:58,093 --> 00:28:00,470 Can you please turn the music down? Absolutely. 643 00:28:00,470 --> 00:28:01,680 Whatever. And you're right. 644 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:03,515 That's so, so cool to do that. 645 00:28:03,515 --> 00:28:06,518 And I and I know people who not to mention names, but, 646 00:28:06,685 --> 00:28:08,937 you know, they do have a bit of an ego when they get insulted. 647 00:28:08,937 --> 00:28:09,688 Oh yeah. 648 00:28:09,688 --> 00:28:12,982 And I think that's why, you know, you can't you 649 00:28:13,024 --> 00:28:16,361 you can't be insulted or offended unless you choose to be right. 650 00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:18,196 Yeah. That's absolutely right. Not true. 651 00:28:18,196 --> 00:28:20,115 You really can't be. All I want to know. 652 00:28:20,115 --> 00:28:23,201 Do you do a nod to your dad by playing Beatles music? 653 00:28:23,201 --> 00:28:25,453 Mike. Yeah, I think my dad. Every time you play a Beatles song. 654 00:28:25,453 --> 00:28:25,954 Yeah, yeah. 655 00:28:25,954 --> 00:28:31,418 I mean, my dad loved music, so, Yeah, Beatles to me is my dad. 656 00:28:31,876 --> 00:28:33,712 Yeah, yeah, I play when we play on my like. 657 00:28:33,712 --> 00:28:34,754 I'm a very emotional. 658 00:28:34,754 --> 00:28:34,921 Yeah. 659 00:28:34,921 --> 00:28:37,841 My life's one of my all time favorite songs by them. 660 00:28:37,841 --> 00:28:38,383 Yeah. 661 00:28:38,383 --> 00:28:40,009 There were times I'll even tear up when I'm playing. 662 00:28:40,009 --> 00:28:41,302 Is I'm just like that. 663 00:28:41,302 --> 00:28:44,723 And I think a lot of people who hear me go, especially who follow us, going, 664 00:28:44,723 --> 00:28:46,808 you know, you could kind of hear the Katy, your voice. 665 00:28:46,808 --> 00:28:49,602 You sing Run by Gertie. Now. Now what? 666 00:28:49,602 --> 00:28:53,565 What's, I'm a huge Simon and Garfunkel van, huge fan. 667 00:28:53,565 --> 00:28:55,483 I mean, I virtually like all their songs. 668 00:28:55,483 --> 00:28:56,401 Which ones do you do? 669 00:28:56,401 --> 00:28:58,820 You do the. We do the boxer. Yeah. 670 00:28:59,988 --> 00:29:01,156 Sound of silence. 671 00:29:01,156 --> 00:29:02,490 Robinson. 672 00:29:02,490 --> 00:29:04,451 Yeah, we flirted with Sound of Silence. Yeah. 673 00:29:04,451 --> 00:29:07,203 Tom is one of those gifted musicians where 674 00:29:07,203 --> 00:29:10,498 if someone comes up and asks for a song and he doesn't know what, 675 00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,752 he could literally think about it for about a minute and a half. 676 00:29:13,752 --> 00:29:15,503 Wow, what a gift. 677 00:29:15,503 --> 00:29:17,172 What a gift. 678 00:29:17,172 --> 00:29:19,299 I'm not saying every song on earth, right? Right. 679 00:29:19,299 --> 00:29:23,595 But if he maybe heard it or whatever, you know, he could try to figure it out. 680 00:29:23,595 --> 00:29:27,223 That's what's so special about what he does. Wow. 681 00:29:27,474 --> 00:29:28,391 And I'm the wedding singer. 682 00:29:28,391 --> 00:29:30,435 I pretty much know 683 00:29:30,435 --> 00:29:31,478 that's a great movie. 684 00:29:31,478 --> 00:29:32,729 Adam Sandler, the wedding singer. 685 00:29:32,729 --> 00:29:34,022 I love that movie. 686 00:29:34,022 --> 00:29:36,900 Wow. Yeah. But, it's it's a nice it's nice. 687 00:29:36,900 --> 00:29:38,777 And, you know, as you know, 688 00:29:39,819 --> 00:29:41,571 it's, you know, 689 00:29:41,571 --> 00:29:45,825 deejaying and weddings and stuff like that for us as a duo. 690 00:29:46,075 --> 00:29:48,912 We started out in restaurants 691 00:29:48,912 --> 00:29:51,915 and bars and for a musician, I'm being honest with you. 692 00:29:51,915 --> 00:29:54,709 And it's such a thorn in my side 693 00:29:54,709 --> 00:29:57,670 because it hasn't changed in 50 years. 694 00:29:57,921 --> 00:30:02,383 I musicians who have been playing out since the 80s who made the same pay 695 00:30:02,550 --> 00:30:03,718 is today. Yeah. 696 00:30:03,718 --> 00:30:05,094 And that's so sad. 697 00:30:05,094 --> 00:30:07,764 And that is that doesn't happen as an electrician. 698 00:30:07,764 --> 00:30:09,682 It doesn't happen as a plumber for some reason. 699 00:30:09,682 --> 00:30:11,976 Musicians for like a second class. Yeah. 700 00:30:11,976 --> 00:30:13,269 And it's so sad. 701 00:30:13,269 --> 00:30:16,397 Tom and I started about eight years ago. 702 00:30:16,397 --> 00:30:19,359 We met and we said, listen, we know we're really good at. 703 00:30:19,484 --> 00:30:22,362 So let's triple our prices. 704 00:30:22,362 --> 00:30:25,907 Let's start going into country clubs trying to get in some corporate stuff. 705 00:30:26,741 --> 00:30:30,203 Big thing is private party, you know, stuff like that 706 00:30:30,495 --> 00:30:33,456 where the pay is literally quadruple, right? 707 00:30:33,456 --> 00:30:35,166 More than you would get in a bar. Sure. 708 00:30:35,166 --> 00:30:37,168 And that's why it became lucrative for us, 709 00:30:37,168 --> 00:30:40,630 because a lot of musicians play out and they're making love. 710 00:30:40,964 --> 00:30:41,631 And so sad. 711 00:30:41,631 --> 00:30:44,300 I mean, I know a lot of a lot of my favorite music. 712 00:30:44,300 --> 00:30:46,553 Music is smooth jazz, right? 713 00:30:46,553 --> 00:30:50,098 And a lot of these guys are awesome musicians and they're making no money. 714 00:30:50,557 --> 00:30:51,266 They're making zero. 715 00:30:51,266 --> 00:30:53,852 There's no sales for smooth jazz music. 716 00:30:53,852 --> 00:30:55,061 And I love it. 717 00:30:55,061 --> 00:30:57,981 And I played it all my wedding receptions for dinner and cocktail hour. 718 00:30:57,981 --> 00:30:59,524 And people love it. 719 00:30:59,524 --> 00:31:02,777 But you're right about by but by pay I mean wedding receptions 720 00:31:02,777 --> 00:31:06,614 is mainly 90% of what I do, and that's where the paychecks are. 721 00:31:06,865 --> 00:31:10,285 But if you're doing some of those smaller things, restaurants can't afford us 722 00:31:10,994 --> 00:31:12,787 and nor would they pay. Right. 723 00:31:12,787 --> 00:31:16,040 And, and and that's not a knock on them because the restaurant business. 724 00:31:16,374 --> 00:31:17,125 Absolutely. 725 00:31:17,125 --> 00:31:20,128 They have very, very little room for profit. 726 00:31:20,211 --> 00:31:22,797 These four restaurants like grocery stores, same thing. 727 00:31:22,797 --> 00:31:25,758 Yep. I think that because we're a little bit established 728 00:31:25,758 --> 00:31:28,761 and they get to kind of take a look at us and know what we do, 729 00:31:29,137 --> 00:31:31,598 and we have a wide variety of stuff that we kind of sell ourselves. 730 00:31:31,598 --> 00:31:32,599 Now. Yep. 731 00:31:32,599 --> 00:31:34,767 That took a very long time to get. 732 00:31:34,767 --> 00:31:38,563 Yeah, I mean, I can remember 25 years ago coming home from a gig in Enfield, 733 00:31:38,563 --> 00:31:40,273 literally crying, going, like, what are we doing? 734 00:31:40,273 --> 00:31:42,400 Yeah, yeah. You know, you're not doing anything wrong. 735 00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:44,152 Nothing. We're weren't doing nothing wrong. 736 00:31:44,152 --> 00:31:46,154 But that takes a long time to get to. 737 00:31:46,154 --> 00:31:47,155 You know, I were very, 738 00:31:47,155 --> 00:31:50,158 very lucky that, you know, people are identifying it, but it's now. 739 00:31:50,158 --> 00:31:51,075 Well, Frank, let me ask you this. 740 00:31:51,075 --> 00:31:52,785 How can people get in contact with you? 741 00:31:52,785 --> 00:31:56,039 Our website is the medium. Yeah, yeah. 742 00:31:56,122 --> 00:31:57,707 We are on TikTok. 743 00:31:57,707 --> 00:32:00,710 I think it's the medium stocked Facebook all over the place. 744 00:32:00,710 --> 00:32:03,087 The medium? Yeah. That. Yeah, yeah. 745 00:32:03,087 --> 00:32:04,964 And I think a lot of people who are watching right now 746 00:32:04,964 --> 00:32:06,466 may want to get in contact with you, 747 00:32:06,466 --> 00:32:08,343 maybe for a little bit of counseling or chat, 748 00:32:08,343 --> 00:32:10,637 because I know you love to serve and help other people 749 00:32:10,637 --> 00:32:13,640 rob people battling addictions right now that you can help. 750 00:32:13,932 --> 00:32:16,476 And I just love that you want to be a server. 751 00:32:16,476 --> 00:32:19,187 You're all about serving. That's how I keep this gift. 752 00:32:19,187 --> 00:32:22,523 Yeah, and I think service for me is is everything, you know? Yep. 753 00:32:22,815 --> 00:32:25,276 And you know and God bless and God bless you. 754 00:32:25,276 --> 00:32:26,444 God bless your family. 755 00:32:26,444 --> 00:32:27,362 Thanks for all you do. 756 00:32:27,362 --> 00:32:30,031 And I'm just so glad you've been able to overcome these obstacles. 757 00:32:30,031 --> 00:32:33,409 And, we're we're just praying for you and we're cheering you on, 758 00:32:33,576 --> 00:32:35,203 and we're cheering you on as well. 759 00:32:35,203 --> 00:32:38,206 And thank you so much for having us on another edition of What's Good with China. 760 00:32:38,206 --> 00:32:41,042 Joyce, please share this with somebody who can utilize this. 761 00:32:41,042 --> 00:32:44,921 Maybe a message today resonated with you, and you're thinking of somebody I wish 762 00:32:45,296 --> 00:32:48,132 maybe this can can help this episode. 763 00:32:48,132 --> 00:32:49,008 Please share it. 764 00:32:49,008 --> 00:32:52,053 You can catch us on YouTube, subscribe for free, share it with everybody you know. 765 00:32:52,387 --> 00:32:54,055 And thank you so much for listening. 766 00:32:54,055 --> 00:32:55,056 Bless you and your family. 767 00:32:55,056 --> 00:32:57,350 Thanks for listening or watching or both. 768 00:32:57,350 --> 00:33:02,021 And Joyce, always great teaming up with you, always with you, my joy and Frank. 769 00:33:02,021 --> 00:33:05,400 I'm so glad we met at the coffee shop that day you came in. 770 00:33:05,942 --> 00:33:06,859 You're an amazing guy. 771 00:33:06,859 --> 00:33:09,821 And again, give my best to sell to your brother so much. 772 00:33:09,821 --> 00:33:11,489 Till next time. Bye. 773 00:33:11,489 --> 00:33:13,157 Hey, I heard you got engaged. 774 00:33:13,157 --> 00:33:14,325 Congratulations. 775 00:33:14,325 --> 00:33:16,160 Now it's time to book the DJ. 776 00:33:16,160 --> 00:33:17,120 And that's where we come in. 777 00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:19,789 Hi, I'm John Cadillac, Seville with John Seville entertainment. 778 00:33:19,789 --> 00:33:23,167 Wedding wire and the knot 2026 Couples Choice Awards winner. 779 00:33:23,167 --> 00:33:24,585 You can call me directly if you'd like it. 780 00:33:24,585 --> 00:33:26,921 (200) 398-8065 eight. 781 00:33:26,921 --> 00:33:30,425 We'll set up your free consultation or go to John cashman.com. 782 00:33:30,425 --> 00:33:34,887 That's (203) 988-0658 or John cashman.com. 783 00:33:34,887 --> 00:33:38,099 We offer excellent peace of mind and a great time 784 00:33:38,099 --> 00:33:42,103 for all John Seville Entertainment a name you know and can trust.