WEBVTT NOTE This file was generated by Descript 00:00:07.100 --> 00:00:09.350 Candace Dellacona: Welcome to the Sandwich Generation Survival Guide. 00:00:09.350 --> 00:00:15.530 I am your host, Candace Dellacona, and my guest is a bit of a departure 00:00:15.530 --> 00:00:20.000 from the standard Sandwich Generation Survival Guide lineup, but not 00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.520 outside of my world in two ways. 00:00:22.880 --> 00:00:25.065 As many of our listeners know, I'm an estate planning attorney 00:00:25.125 --> 00:00:29.785 by trade and a good portion of my practice I work with athletes. 00:00:30.170 --> 00:00:33.290 Professional and collegiate in planning their estate plan. 00:00:33.780 --> 00:00:39.030 And our guest today is professional athlete adjacent, I would say. 00:00:39.360 --> 00:00:44.640 So I wanna welcome to the podcast today, Fox Sports NFL and College 00:00:44.640 --> 00:00:47.400 Football Rules Analyst, Dean Blandino. 00:00:47.460 --> 00:00:48.005 Welcome Dean. 00:00:48.870 --> 00:00:49.950 Dean Blandino: Thanks for having me. 00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:50.870 This is awesome. 00:00:50.870 --> 00:00:54.290 Yeah, definitely professional athlete adjacent, I think is a great 00:00:54.290 --> 00:00:56.685 way to describe kind of what I do. 00:00:57.165 --> 00:00:58.035 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, for sure. 00:00:58.035 --> 00:01:01.605 So for those of you who are not football plans, haven't heard of the 00:01:01.605 --> 00:01:04.425 tush push or chanted Dez caught it. 00:01:04.785 --> 00:01:08.805 Dean is the NFL's former VP of Officiating. 00:01:08.855 --> 00:01:11.735 And you spent the bulk of your career at the NFL. 00:01:11.735 --> 00:01:16.265 You've had a couple of pivots and you've started a couple of your own podcasts. 00:01:16.265 --> 00:01:18.875 So you're a professional podcast guest at this point. 00:01:18.875 --> 00:01:23.185 I love listening to Calm Down with Erin Andrews and Charissa Thompson. 00:01:23.185 --> 00:01:24.685 I know you make appearances there. 00:01:24.685 --> 00:01:28.135 And you were on Jay Glazer's Unbreakable, which I love the subject 00:01:28.135 --> 00:01:29.275 matter, talking about mental health. 00:01:29.275 --> 00:01:30.775 So thanks for being here. 00:01:31.550 --> 00:01:32.480 Dean Blandino: Yeah, of course. 00:01:32.480 --> 00:01:36.920 And I love this the whole sandwich generation concept. 00:01:36.920 --> 00:01:41.120 I didn't even know like I didn't know the term. 00:01:41.120 --> 00:01:43.700 I didn't know until we started talking about it. 00:01:43.700 --> 00:01:46.110 And, but then I was like, wow, that's, yeah, I'm in it. 00:01:46.110 --> 00:01:46.800 Let's go. 00:01:46.925 --> 00:01:47.885 Candace Dellacona: You are in it. 00:01:47.885 --> 00:01:48.485 You are in it. 00:01:48.485 --> 00:01:52.405 And before we get to the bulk of the sandwich generation issues and 00:01:52.405 --> 00:01:55.725 maybe the wisdom that you can bestow on others, let's talk a little 00:01:55.725 --> 00:01:58.575 bit about your background, where you came from, how you got here. 00:01:58.875 --> 00:02:00.885 So you are a New York native, right? 00:02:01.665 --> 00:02:03.595 Dean Blandino: Yeah, grew up in Long Island. 00:02:03.645 --> 00:02:11.710 Belmore born and raised, and I went to school in New York at Hofstra University 00:02:12.590 --> 00:02:15.255 yeah I had a communications degree. 00:02:15.255 --> 00:02:19.665 I grew up playing sports, love sports, anything and everything, whether it 00:02:19.665 --> 00:02:23.085 was football, baseball, basketball, hockey in the street, in the school 00:02:23.085 --> 00:02:25.185 yard, in leagues, in high school. 00:02:25.185 --> 00:02:30.755 It was just, that was such a big part my earlier life and I wanted to stay involved 00:02:30.755 --> 00:02:32.825 in that in some way, shape, or form. 00:02:32.825 --> 00:02:36.820 And I didn't know what that looked like as a career, but when I got outta 00:02:36.820 --> 00:02:42.600 school, this was pre-internet, pre-social media, pre any of that and just sent 00:02:42.600 --> 00:02:47.950 my resume to the major sports leagues that all had offices in New York City. 00:02:47.950 --> 00:02:51.770 And was lucky enough to get a job interview, an internship interview at the 00:02:51.770 --> 00:02:57.255 NFL in a couple of different departments, and I got the internship in officiating 00:02:57.255 --> 00:02:58.425 and I didn't know anything about it. 00:02:58.475 --> 00:03:02.030 I wasn't interested in officiating necessarily, but I loved the NFL, wanted 00:03:02.030 --> 00:03:06.470 to get my foot in the door and then learn officiating through that internship, was 00:03:06.470 --> 00:03:08.850 hired full-time and that became my career. 00:03:09.365 --> 00:03:10.765 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, it's really pretty remarkable. 00:03:10.765 --> 00:03:14.835 I love one of the stories that you tell about the happenstance of it all 00:03:14.835 --> 00:03:16.595 that, you're submitting your resume. 00:03:16.595 --> 00:03:20.225 We can talk to a lot of the parents out there that are dealing with their kids 00:03:20.225 --> 00:03:22.055 and internships and submitting a resume. 00:03:22.055 --> 00:03:26.835 And Hofstra is a great school, but it's probably not known necessarily for sports 00:03:26.835 --> 00:03:28.485 communication, or it wasn't back then. 00:03:29.025 --> 00:03:32.355 And I think the story was somebody saw your resume, who happened to be oh. 00:03:33.690 --> 00:03:37.135 Dean Blandino: That's, and I tell my kids too, and I know your kids and as 00:03:37.135 --> 00:03:40.195 we think about college and stuff and it's such a great experience, right? 00:03:40.195 --> 00:03:43.885 But it doesn't mean, look, you can be successful a lot of different paths. 00:03:43.915 --> 00:03:48.655 But I think one of the benefits of going to college is those connections and that 00:03:48.655 --> 00:03:54.030 network of people that you need and they become part of your network going forward. 00:03:54.175 --> 00:03:57.505 And this was just happened, someone that was working in human resources 00:03:57.815 --> 00:04:01.955 went to Hofstra, didn't know me, but saw my resume, saw the Hofstra on the 00:04:01.955 --> 00:04:04.805 resume and was like, oh, I'm gonna take this person and move 'em up to the top. 00:04:04.855 --> 00:04:05.125 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, 00:04:05.180 --> 00:04:06.250 Dean Blandino: And that was kind of cool. 00:04:06.250 --> 00:04:08.930 And a fun story and got to know her a little bit. 00:04:08.930 --> 00:04:10.880 And she told me that, and I was like, wow that's awesome. 00:04:10.880 --> 00:04:11.150 And, 00:04:11.185 --> 00:04:11.545 Candace Dellacona: yeah. 00:04:11.960 --> 00:04:12.290 Dean Blandino: yeah. 00:04:12.595 --> 00:04:15.555 Candace Dellacona: Yeah it's always great to be able to give somebody 00:04:15.555 --> 00:04:18.515 maybe the inside scoop and they have to take it the rest of the way, and I 00:04:18.515 --> 00:04:22.814 think we were talking before, all of our kids are getting older and circling 00:04:22.814 --> 00:04:27.494 the wagons and figuring out who knows who and being perhaps a way to expose 00:04:27.494 --> 00:04:32.424 somebody to an area of something that they wanna work in or try out. 00:04:32.424 --> 00:04:37.224 And so you started out as an intern, and tell us a little bit about your 00:04:37.224 --> 00:04:41.514 time, maybe at the NFL and your trajectory from intern to all the 00:04:41.514 --> 00:04:45.684 way up to VP and, being one of the spokespeople for the NFL and officiating. 00:04:46.289 --> 00:04:50.859 Dean Blandino: Incredible journey and so blessed with that opportunity and I 00:04:50.859 --> 00:04:54.579 was surrounded by so many good people that took an interest in my development 00:04:55.539 --> 00:05:01.119 and back then this was prior to now we have YouTube and we have access to video 00:05:01.119 --> 00:05:02.979 online, and this was prior to that. 00:05:03.029 --> 00:05:08.939 And so we were editing officiating tapes, like pass interference calls or holding 00:05:08.939 --> 00:05:13.919 calls and we had to do it from tape to tape and pull this play from this game 00:05:13.919 --> 00:05:19.184 and record it onto a separate we were using beta cam and we were using VHS. 00:05:19.934 --> 00:05:23.774 And so I would sit there and put these tapes together and I would watch the video 00:05:23.774 --> 00:05:27.974 because it wasn't that you just had to let it run and record it on the other deck. 00:05:28.974 --> 00:05:31.284 I would watch the video and I would ask questions. 00:05:31.284 --> 00:05:34.424 And that's how I learned what pass interference is and what 00:05:34.424 --> 00:05:35.684 illegal hands to the face is. 00:05:35.684 --> 00:05:37.124 And I learned all those things. 00:05:37.524 --> 00:05:43.714 And then in 1999, the NFL brought back instant replay and I, having the technical 00:05:43.714 --> 00:05:48.074 background that I had from my education and working in television production and 00:05:48.074 --> 00:05:53.764 everything else, this, that kind of, that experience helped me be a part of that on 00:05:53.764 --> 00:05:58.714 the technical side, bringing back replay and some of the systems and processes to 00:05:58.714 --> 00:06:00.904 that and the software and the hardware. 00:06:01.214 --> 00:06:04.454 And then I became a replay official and learned those rules. 00:06:04.454 --> 00:06:05.294 And yeah. 00:06:05.294 --> 00:06:08.264 And then I got to what I felt was a fork in the road. 00:06:08.274 --> 00:06:14.644 And this is like 2008 where I knew that I wanted to continue in officiating. 00:06:14.644 --> 00:06:19.884 I knew that I had gained so much experience and was this well-rounded 00:06:20.364 --> 00:06:24.474 background now, and I thought I could be in charge of the officiating department, 00:06:24.474 --> 00:06:27.804 but there was this glass ceiling at the time where, 'cause I never officiated, 00:06:27.804 --> 00:06:31.774 I didn't officiate on the field and that was seen as a roadblock for me. 00:06:31.824 --> 00:06:35.844 I took the opportunity at that point to leave the NFL started my own company 00:06:35.844 --> 00:06:40.234 consulting company with different college conferences and continue to 00:06:40.384 --> 00:06:44.924 consult with the NFL and teaching and training replay officials and 00:06:44.924 --> 00:06:46.544 working with the system vendors. 00:06:46.544 --> 00:06:48.784 And a couple of years later, the NFL. 00:06:49.039 --> 00:06:53.609 Brought me back full time and I ultimately broke through that glass ceiling and I 00:06:53.609 --> 00:06:56.489 was named the head of officiating in 2013. 00:06:56.489 --> 00:06:58.729 So it was just a really cool experience. 00:06:59.104 --> 00:07:02.524 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, and so there's a lot of information and all that you 00:07:02.524 --> 00:07:06.154 said and I think you're so humble in the way that you're talking about it, 00:07:06.154 --> 00:07:11.044 because I think what you just described is there was not that technology yet 00:07:11.044 --> 00:07:16.344 at the outset, so you were tasked with putting the tapes together in a way 00:07:16.344 --> 00:07:18.264 without any sort of technological help. 00:07:18.264 --> 00:07:21.414 And then when you had the technology and it caught up to you, you set the 00:07:21.414 --> 00:07:24.384 protocol or you were certainly one of the people that did it, which is 00:07:24.744 --> 00:07:27.764 really amazing and probably when you look back and realize how young you 00:07:27.764 --> 00:07:30.204 were to have that kind of impact. 00:07:31.199 --> 00:07:34.349 Dean Blandino: It was yes and oh, I was in my twenties and there 00:07:34.349 --> 00:07:36.029 were points where I was like, why? 00:07:36.309 --> 00:07:40.874 There are very experienced, seasoned people in this officiating world that 00:07:40.874 --> 00:07:42.914 are giving, that must think highly of me. 00:07:42.914 --> 00:07:45.914 'cause they were giving me these opportunities just said, I'm 00:07:45.914 --> 00:07:49.174 gonna, I'm really gonna throw myself into this and I wanna be. 00:07:50.234 --> 00:07:52.094 I'm gonna learn the rules inside and out. 00:07:52.094 --> 00:07:54.974 I know that I never officiated, so I know that will always be 00:07:54.974 --> 00:07:59.064 something that will be held against me, for lack of a better term. 00:07:59.064 --> 00:08:01.274 But I said, I'm gonna learn the rules inside and out. 00:08:01.274 --> 00:08:04.399 I'm gonna become an expert in all of these different areas and just try to 00:08:04.399 --> 00:08:08.749 make myself indispensable from that perspective and yeah, and being in my 00:08:08.749 --> 00:08:10.969 twenties and being a part of that process. 00:08:10.969 --> 00:08:13.939 And like you said, setting the protocol and now you look at instant 00:08:13.939 --> 00:08:17.689 replay and what it has become and it's part of every sport. 00:08:17.739 --> 00:08:21.159 And it's really become an integral part of every game that we know. 00:08:21.159 --> 00:08:24.209 So it was, yeah, when you think back , it's pretty cool. 00:08:24.209 --> 00:08:28.589 But , I try to like I don't really like to talk about myself from that perspective. 00:08:28.709 --> 00:08:31.189 Candace Dellacona: Timing and the grind and the hustle and that 00:08:31.189 --> 00:08:34.639 combination, something we all try to impart to our kids, right? 00:08:34.639 --> 00:08:37.529 That, you can meet the right people, but you have to be ready 00:08:37.529 --> 00:08:39.089 to take on that responsibility. 00:08:39.089 --> 00:08:42.089 And to your point, you had never officiated on the actual field. 00:08:42.419 --> 00:08:46.169 So you had this proverbial hurdle that you could never overcome 00:08:46.169 --> 00:08:47.459 because that wasn't in your future. 00:08:47.459 --> 00:08:50.769 So you had to figure out a way to get around that and earn the 00:08:50.769 --> 00:08:52.839 credibility, which clearly you did. 00:08:52.839 --> 00:08:56.859 And when you realized that it was time to leave the NFL and you pivoted, did 00:08:56.859 --> 00:08:58.504 people in your life tell you were crazy? 00:08:58.504 --> 00:08:59.229 How did that go down? 00:08:59.964 --> 00:09:03.364 Dean Blandino: Yeah, I remember it was, it took a lot of people by surprise 00:09:03.364 --> 00:09:07.414 at the NFL because, and it was like you said, timing is so important. 00:09:07.464 --> 00:09:10.504 You can be in the right place at the right time, but what do you do with it? 00:09:10.504 --> 00:09:12.114 What do you do with that opportunity? 00:09:12.114 --> 00:09:13.224 That's up to you. 00:09:13.554 --> 00:09:17.764 And so there was an opportunity where the NFL was giving an enhanced 00:09:17.764 --> 00:09:21.244 severance package to people that had been there a certain amount of years. 00:09:21.674 --> 00:09:22.994 And so 10 or more years. 00:09:22.994 --> 00:09:26.414 And you could leave voluntarily and we'll give you this enhanced package. 00:09:27.159 --> 00:09:29.229 And I looked at that as an opportunity. 00:09:29.229 --> 00:09:33.579 I said, okay, I can take this package continue to get, the 00:09:33.579 --> 00:09:37.509 benefits and compensation for, an extended period of time. 00:09:37.509 --> 00:09:41.149 And then build out, this company, this idea that I was thinking about. 00:09:41.149 --> 00:09:42.649 'cause there was nothing in the space. 00:09:43.729 --> 00:09:46.699 and it was just, again, being in the right place at the right time, jumping 00:09:46.699 --> 00:09:50.839 at the opportunity, continued to work with the NFL on a consulting basis, so 00:09:50.839 --> 00:09:54.079 no longer full-time, but then I was able to branch out and do these other things. 00:09:54.499 --> 00:09:56.239 And work with these other organizations. 00:09:56.239 --> 00:09:57.559 And again, it just helped me. 00:09:57.929 --> 00:10:00.409 And yeah, when they heard I was taking that package, they 00:10:00.409 --> 00:10:01.489 were like what are you doing? 00:10:01.549 --> 00:10:06.169 And I knew it was a risk, but the way I looked at it, it was a calculated risk. 00:10:06.219 --> 00:10:07.389 I had planned it out. 00:10:07.389 --> 00:10:12.859 I had spoken to enough people I knew that I was gonna have these college conferences 00:10:13.109 --> 00:10:17.209 contract with me and and I was gonna continue to be able to work with the NFL. 00:10:17.209 --> 00:10:18.919 Sometimes you have to take those risks. 00:10:18.949 --> 00:10:21.339 I felt really good about it and it worked out in the end. 00:10:21.709 --> 00:10:23.714 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, I think a lot of people in the middle of our 00:10:23.714 --> 00:10:26.954 career, we have young kids and you think about do you take the certain 00:10:26.954 --> 00:10:28.754 path or do you forge out on your own? 00:10:28.964 --> 00:10:32.634 And a lot of it is real bravery as calculated as the risk may have been, 00:10:32.634 --> 00:10:35.874 and you have maybe a bit of a cushion knowing that you have these contacts and 00:10:35.874 --> 00:10:39.624 you've done a really good job at keeping those contacts, it's still a huge risk. 00:10:39.624 --> 00:10:44.364 So I think bravo to you for taking it in the middle of your career and what 00:10:44.364 --> 00:10:48.684 other people might've thought was the ideal position, and you walked away 00:10:48.734 --> 00:10:50.474 and it really worked out for you. 00:10:50.474 --> 00:10:54.874 And that'll probably be a good segment into our discussion about being in 00:10:54.874 --> 00:10:56.944 the middle, being in the sandwich. 00:10:56.994 --> 00:11:00.774 Your mom has made an appearance in media from time to time. 00:11:00.774 --> 00:11:04.914 We all love hearing, her thoughts about how smart and handsome you are. 00:11:05.004 --> 00:11:06.294 And she is a character. 00:11:06.294 --> 00:11:10.404 And so why don't you talk a little bit about maybe your family and 00:11:10.404 --> 00:11:13.974 like the sandwich generation with your mom and your family structure. 00:11:14.754 --> 00:11:17.234 Dean Blandino: Well, yeah, family structure, I mean, grew 00:11:17.254 --> 00:11:20.034 up in a big Italian family. 00:11:20.034 --> 00:11:22.194 And my mom was born in Italy. 00:11:22.194 --> 00:11:26.144 They, my grandparents and on that side, my dad's family had been in 00:11:26.144 --> 00:11:28.454 America for a couple of generations. 00:11:28.454 --> 00:11:32.484 But it was that big Italian American family was so, so important. 00:11:33.384 --> 00:11:36.474 and Sunday meals and those gatherings and everything. 00:11:36.474 --> 00:11:40.064 And my mom is such a big, like you said, she's such a character, 00:11:40.064 --> 00:11:42.104 she's such a big personality. 00:11:42.414 --> 00:11:44.604 She was like the neighborhood mom. 00:11:44.604 --> 00:11:48.234 Everybody would come to our house and you could just come in and there'd be 00:11:48.234 --> 00:11:49.884 food and there'd be all these things. 00:11:50.574 --> 00:11:53.304 She still to this day is that person. 00:11:53.304 --> 00:11:54.624 And it's incredible. 00:11:54.904 --> 00:11:58.654 I joke with her that she's gonna outlive all of us and she's 00:11:58.654 --> 00:12:00.064 just, and she's gonna keep going. 00:12:00.064 --> 00:12:01.084 She's incredible. 00:12:01.534 --> 00:12:06.274 And that was a big part of growing up, but then I left. 00:12:06.329 --> 00:12:10.189 I went and when I left the NFL, I also moved. 00:12:11.309 --> 00:12:15.009 Was married at the time was about to have our first child. 00:12:15.339 --> 00:12:18.249 And I moved from New York to Southern California. 00:12:18.249 --> 00:12:22.549 And that was a big, big jump and away from family, away from friends. 00:12:23.669 --> 00:12:26.759 And that long distance stuff that, that was hard. 00:12:26.759 --> 00:12:30.069 And my dad who passed away in 2012, he was still alive at 00:12:30.069 --> 00:12:31.889 that time and so missing them. 00:12:32.124 --> 00:12:36.294 Trying to maintain those relationships and also starting to build my 00:12:36.294 --> 00:12:40.914 own family, having this new business and all of this change. 00:12:40.924 --> 00:12:42.634 It was kind of like a whirlwind. 00:12:42.684 --> 00:12:46.204 And you kind of look back and think, wow. 00:12:46.214 --> 00:12:48.254 How did we work through all of that? 00:12:48.284 --> 00:12:51.154 And then, like I said, it came back in 2012. 00:12:51.194 --> 00:12:55.454 To go back to the NFL, that's when my dad passed and I was thankful to be there, 00:12:56.474 --> 00:13:01.224 and be home for a little bit, when he, he got sick and but yeah, that's just 00:13:01.224 --> 00:13:02.814 a little bit of the background and, but 00:13:02.899 --> 00:13:02.959 Candace Dellacona: Yeah 00:13:03.114 --> 00:13:03.774 Dean Blandino: the, you know, and. 00:13:04.169 --> 00:13:06.149 Candace Dellacona: You make a, an important distinction, right? 00:13:06.149 --> 00:13:09.449 Where there, there are expectations set for everybody. 00:13:09.449 --> 00:13:12.959 Everybody's family has like a different playbook, if you will. 00:13:13.299 --> 00:13:20.289 And an Italian American, Italian off the boat, Italy, Long Island, we know it well. 00:13:20.379 --> 00:13:26.244 And the expectations that proximity in terms of distance, right? 00:13:26.304 --> 00:13:31.014 And you know how hard it is to break out of that and not have 00:13:31.014 --> 00:13:33.444 it be a rejection of the family. 00:13:33.444 --> 00:13:37.194 Or like a statement about not wanting to be close, really trying to forge 00:13:37.194 --> 00:13:39.024 your own path and build your own life. 00:13:39.024 --> 00:13:44.644 And I think so many of our listeners think about that and now we're 10, 00:13:44.644 --> 00:13:46.654 15 years further down the line. 00:13:46.654 --> 00:13:50.404 And our parents are older, some of them like your dad, my dad are no longer here. 00:13:50.614 --> 00:13:55.414 And so it brings up questions about what's next and how to 00:13:55.414 --> 00:13:57.444 advocate from a, long distance. 00:13:57.444 --> 00:14:01.404 I know you have siblings and your mom is doing amazing and she is 00:14:01.404 --> 00:14:04.224 definitely not the typical aging parent. 00:14:04.224 --> 00:14:09.964 We'll give her that, but, thinking about how you deal with being far away and 00:14:09.964 --> 00:14:11.494 the support that you need to provide. 00:14:11.494 --> 00:14:15.464 What is your best advice for those of our listeners who don't live 00:14:15.464 --> 00:14:17.174 close by, who can't pop over? 00:14:17.344 --> 00:14:17.944 Dean Blandino: Sure. 00:14:17.974 --> 00:14:20.774 And then that, like you said, you hit the nail on the head with that, that 00:14:20.774 --> 00:14:23.294 expectation of proximity is so real 00:14:23.544 --> 00:14:23.874 Candace Dellacona: Yeah. 00:14:24.014 --> 00:14:24.674 Dean Blandino: felt it. 00:14:24.794 --> 00:14:29.144 And I know, and my parents were always very supportive, but they were 00:14:29.354 --> 00:14:36.434 absolutely crushed when we moved to California and so totally get it. 00:14:36.704 --> 00:14:38.804 But then like you said, you have to forge your own path. 00:14:38.804 --> 00:14:43.384 And for me, yes, my mom does stay at my sister's and there's a lot going 00:14:43.384 --> 00:14:48.324 on and it keeps you busy and three grandkids and two dogs and everything 00:14:48.324 --> 00:14:50.484 else that goes on with everyday life. 00:14:51.294 --> 00:14:56.434 But, the biggest challenge again is just making time to A communicate. 00:14:56.434 --> 00:14:59.889 It's picking up the phone and calling and having those conversations. 00:15:00.259 --> 00:15:04.019 Whether it's text message, making sure it's even things like you know, 00:15:04.019 --> 00:15:08.879 I don't post a lot of my personal stuff on Instagram or whatever it may 00:15:08.879 --> 00:15:11.729 be, but I know my mom's always like, oh, I wanna see pictures of the kids. 00:15:11.729 --> 00:15:13.199 I wanna see, what they're doing. 00:15:13.199 --> 00:15:13.679 I wanna see. 00:15:13.679 --> 00:15:17.669 So just even just that and sending them, trying to FaceTime those 00:15:17.669 --> 00:15:20.069 types of things to stay engaged. 00:15:20.409 --> 00:15:23.499 And then, whenever I can get to New York and whenever I can travel, 00:15:23.499 --> 00:15:24.939 try to do that with my boys. 00:15:24.979 --> 00:15:30.809 My two sons now are 15 and 10, try to make that a at least twice a year 00:15:30.809 --> 00:15:33.984 and getting out and seeing family and spending time, especially with my mom. 00:15:33.984 --> 00:15:35.574 She still comes out here once a year. 00:15:36.494 --> 00:15:40.114 And just making that time and effort and just communicating , and then just 00:15:40.114 --> 00:15:44.694 talk, helping my sister with, because it is, my mom isn't, knock on wood. 00:15:44.704 --> 00:15:49.204 She's aging, but she's doing great and she can move around and she 00:15:49.204 --> 00:15:52.074 still drives and she does all these things, but, just making sure, 00:15:52.634 --> 00:15:54.924 checking in whatever they need. 00:15:54.974 --> 00:15:56.144 Can I help in any way? 00:15:56.144 --> 00:15:58.694 That's just that calm kind of communication and 00:15:58.694 --> 00:15:59.804 keeping those lines open. 00:16:00.564 --> 00:16:03.564 Candace Dellacona: It's so important that you communicate and making sure 00:16:03.564 --> 00:16:06.744 that your siblings know too, that you're there, even though you're not there. 00:16:07.044 --> 00:16:10.844 And trying to figure out ways, as I guide clients or other people who 00:16:10.844 --> 00:16:14.744 have asked me, how do you advocate from long distance and there are so 00:16:14.744 --> 00:16:16.424 many different ways of doing that. 00:16:16.424 --> 00:16:19.214 Thankfully we're in a place with technology where you can send 00:16:19.244 --> 00:16:23.054 pictures of the boys at their school concert that your mom may 00:16:23.054 --> 00:16:24.644 not have been able to be a part of. 00:16:24.644 --> 00:16:29.324 And so really making time to do those kinds of things and having 00:16:29.324 --> 00:16:30.584 those meaningful connections. 00:16:30.614 --> 00:16:35.324 'cause there are different ways of being in the middle and being able to advocate. 00:16:35.804 --> 00:16:40.094 And so have you ever found yourself in a conversation with any of your 00:16:40.094 --> 00:16:42.514 siblings to say what is the plan? 00:16:42.514 --> 00:16:46.054 Have you ever had a conversation with your mom to ask about those 00:16:46.054 --> 00:16:48.544 plans, and if so, what did you say? 00:16:49.289 --> 00:16:50.609 Dean Blandino: Yeah, that's a great question. 00:16:50.609 --> 00:16:54.129 And we do, try to check in because, especially with my sister, because 00:16:54.129 --> 00:16:58.549 my mom, she has her own separate kind of living area, but they're together 00:16:58.549 --> 00:17:00.769 a lot and just checking in with her. 00:17:00.769 --> 00:17:03.409 And I know that just like anything else when you live with people, 00:17:03.459 --> 00:17:05.019 there's gonna be ups and downs. 00:17:06.499 --> 00:17:08.919 And I think one of the things that we probably haven't talked 00:17:10.314 --> 00:17:13.924 because my mom really is just, you don't even think about it. 00:17:13.924 --> 00:17:15.724 She's just doing so well. 00:17:16.054 --> 00:17:19.744 We probably haven't had that conversation in depth yet. 00:17:19.844 --> 00:17:23.934 But it is just making sure, I just had a conversation with my mom the other day 00:17:23.934 --> 00:17:28.064 because her car lease is up and what do you wanna do, going forward and wanna 00:17:28.064 --> 00:17:30.004 help her and navigate that process. 00:17:30.004 --> 00:17:32.824 She still drives, she still feels good about driving. 00:17:33.074 --> 00:17:35.474 So I certainly don't want, I'm not gonna push to take that 00:17:35.474 --> 00:17:37.184 away, if that's if she's good. 00:17:37.184 --> 00:17:40.294 And I'll talk to my sister and she said, yeah, she's she has no issues. 00:17:40.914 --> 00:17:44.174 But long term, I don't know, my dad passed suddenly. 00:17:44.174 --> 00:17:48.024 He was fine and then was diagnosed with cancer and a 00:17:48.024 --> 00:17:49.494 couple of months later was gone. 00:17:49.534 --> 00:17:54.184 So I think that's probably scary for my mom to think about as well 00:17:54.184 --> 00:17:58.604 and just, oh, what, even to bring up that conversation I'm sure it'd 00:17:58.604 --> 00:18:00.074 be scary for her to have that. 00:18:00.074 --> 00:18:00.524 So 00:18:00.524 --> 00:18:00.814 Candace Dellacona: Yeah. 00:18:01.044 --> 00:18:02.094 Dean Blandino: we probably tiptoe around it a little 00:18:02.504 --> 00:18:02.794 Candace Dellacona: Yeah. 00:18:02.804 --> 00:18:06.044 Dean Blandino: you, I think as time goes on, those conversations are important. 00:18:06.044 --> 00:18:10.139 They, what is that long term if when mom's not doing as great and she can't move 00:18:10.139 --> 00:18:11.999 around as well, what does that look like? 00:18:11.999 --> 00:18:12.734 I think that's important. 00:18:13.344 --> 00:18:14.424 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, no, for sure. 00:18:14.424 --> 00:18:17.534 And all of these news stories have been coming out recently. 00:18:17.534 --> 00:18:20.654 Bradley Cooper made a documentary about caregiving for his dad. 00:18:20.654 --> 00:18:24.284 I think John Turturro was talking about caring for his disabled brother. 00:18:24.284 --> 00:18:29.174 I think there's a preconceived notion that people who have access to resources, 00:18:29.524 --> 00:18:33.964 that have the ability to have a strong family unit and everybody working 00:18:33.964 --> 00:18:35.764 together that it's so much easier. 00:18:35.764 --> 00:18:40.534 And I think one of the things that I like to point out is that it's the common 00:18:40.534 --> 00:18:41.854 thread that goes through all of us. 00:18:41.854 --> 00:18:43.924 Nobody knows how to have these conversations. 00:18:44.324 --> 00:18:49.184 Not even Dean who negotiates, all of the coaches yelling at you 00:18:49.184 --> 00:18:50.504 about a call that you've made. 00:18:50.504 --> 00:18:54.074 It's really hard to have those conversations and most people don't 00:18:54.074 --> 00:18:55.334 have the tools or the language. 00:18:55.664 --> 00:19:00.114 So thinking about it in advance and thinking just like what you said is 00:19:00.114 --> 00:19:03.834 really insightful about your dad and what she went through losing him. 00:19:03.834 --> 00:19:08.094 And so you're gonna have to think about the ways to have that conversation that's 00:19:08.094 --> 00:19:12.474 sensitive to that loss and to your sister who's there and absorbing a lot of it. 00:19:13.264 --> 00:19:16.784 So it's great that you bring that up and I'm sure after this conversation 00:19:16.784 --> 00:19:20.144 you'll think about how you'll talk to your mom or maybe she'll call in and. 00:19:20.834 --> 00:19:21.124 Dean Blandino: Oh yeah. 00:19:21.194 --> 00:19:22.064 Absolutely. 00:19:22.159 --> 00:19:24.289 And those are those conversations. 00:19:24.389 --> 00:19:28.519 I think once you can broach the subject, then I think it becomes easier. 00:19:28.519 --> 00:19:31.759 It's just figuring out, okay, how do we start this conversation? 00:19:31.809 --> 00:19:36.049 Mom, I don't think that this is, or this doesn't have to be done 00:19:36.049 --> 00:19:39.169 tomorrow, but at some point we do have to start to think about this. 00:19:39.169 --> 00:19:45.229 And and when I think back to my dad, they, like a lot of older parents, I'm 00:19:45.229 --> 00:19:50.879 sure, they went and got funeral plots and you start to prepare for that, which 00:19:51.659 --> 00:19:55.459 it hate thinking about it, but though these are things that have to be done. 00:19:55.489 --> 00:19:57.499 Because then if you don't plan for it. 00:19:58.414 --> 00:20:01.174 On top of the grief and all the things that come with it. 00:20:01.174 --> 00:20:04.394 Now it's okay, now I have all this other stuff I have to take care of. 00:20:04.394 --> 00:20:07.334 And am I really in a good place to be able to even handle that? 00:20:07.739 --> 00:20:08.249 Candace Dellacona: Totally. 00:20:08.249 --> 00:20:11.459 And it can be a conversation of empowerment to say what do you want? 00:20:11.489 --> 00:20:12.269 How do you see it? 00:20:12.269 --> 00:20:15.299 All right, let's make that happen so that you're not in this position. 00:20:15.579 --> 00:20:19.129 Thankfully she, is in a place where she loves and she's with your sister, 00:20:19.129 --> 00:20:20.629 and they make it work together. 00:20:20.629 --> 00:20:22.009 So that is, that's incredible. 00:20:22.009 --> 00:20:23.269 And I think that that's unusual. 00:20:23.269 --> 00:20:24.619 So you're lucky in that regard. 00:20:25.199 --> 00:20:27.989 The other sort of sandwich piece is the kids. 00:20:27.989 --> 00:20:33.089 So tell us how you stay present with the traveling and the TV 00:20:33.089 --> 00:20:36.434 appearances and all of the pressures of co-parenting and all of that. 00:20:37.719 --> 00:20:41.509 Dean Blandino: Yeah, I think one of the things, and that was we talked about when 00:20:41.509 --> 00:20:45.949 I left the NFL, that was the first time and then I was in charge of officiating 00:20:45.949 --> 00:20:49.384 and that was such a, while I loved it. 00:20:49.484 --> 00:20:54.094 And I really feel like that, I feel like that job chose me. 00:20:54.094 --> 00:20:57.064 I didn't choose it, everything, my experience, everything 00:20:57.064 --> 00:20:58.534 that it prepared me for it. 00:20:59.214 --> 00:21:02.004 And I really did love it and I threw myself into it. 00:21:02.134 --> 00:21:04.124 But it's a and not just. 00:21:04.329 --> 00:21:06.999 During football season it's 24 7. 00:21:07.089 --> 00:21:11.469 It is, you have, like we talked about coaches, that, that, it's week to week 00:21:11.469 --> 00:21:15.189 and you're putting out fires every week and you're talking to coaches who are 00:21:15.189 --> 00:21:19.509 all over the country and they don't care that you're in New York and they're in 00:21:19.779 --> 00:21:23.469 San Francisco and they're three hours behind us and it's 1:00 AM they want 00:21:23.469 --> 00:21:24.909 to talk to you or they want to email. 00:21:24.959 --> 00:21:29.519 And I did take the approach and I learned the hard way that I would get 00:21:29.519 --> 00:21:32.349 a, a text or an email work related. 00:21:32.499 --> 00:21:37.359 And I would approach it as if that person is waiting at their laptop 00:21:37.359 --> 00:21:39.099 or at their phone for me to respond. 00:21:39.444 --> 00:21:39.744 Candace Dellacona: Oof. 00:21:39.909 --> 00:21:41.409 Dean Blandino: that was how I looked at it, 00:21:41.604 --> 00:21:41.964 Candace Dellacona: Yep. 00:21:42.559 --> 00:21:44.859 Dean Blandino: Which is not great, and it's not healthy and it's not. 00:21:45.629 --> 00:21:50.624 I neglected a lot of other things and home life and those types of things. 00:21:51.104 --> 00:21:56.834 I realized that that wasn't sustainable for me and the life that I wanted to live 00:21:56.834 --> 00:22:00.394 and for my children and for, my partner. 00:22:00.494 --> 00:22:06.164 And an opportunity came up with Fox Sports and they had reached out and we 00:22:06.164 --> 00:22:09.759 just had some preliminary conversations about this rules analyst position. 00:22:10.604 --> 00:22:13.964 It sounded really interesting, and I love the NFL, but this just sounded like 00:22:13.964 --> 00:22:16.869 a better, a just a better way of life. 00:22:16.899 --> 00:22:18.659 And that was in 2017. 00:22:18.659 --> 00:22:24.369 Unfortunately, we, got divorced, but she's amazing and she's an incredible 00:22:24.369 --> 00:22:28.569 mother and she's an incredible co-parent, and we make that work. 00:22:28.619 --> 00:22:32.074 And then it, yeah, it's just the boys and I feel like I am in such 00:22:32.074 --> 00:22:34.444 a better place while I'm busy. 00:22:35.079 --> 00:22:39.889 I have things to do, i'm not beck and call. 00:22:39.889 --> 00:22:43.399 I'm not looking at emails like, oh my God, I have to respond to this 00:22:43.789 --> 00:22:43.999 Candace Dellacona: Yeah. 00:22:44.539 --> 00:22:44.869 Yeah. 00:22:45.059 --> 00:22:49.204 Dean Blandino: I've taken that step back and being able to enjoy more time with 00:22:49.204 --> 00:22:53.344 the boys and doing different things and going to practices and just spending time. 00:22:53.404 --> 00:22:56.314 We've got the schedule down and I'm traveling during the weekends, but they're 00:22:56.314 --> 00:22:57.934 here with me Monday through Thursday. 00:22:57.934 --> 00:23:00.034 And my little one, I call him my little one, but he's 10. 00:23:00.724 --> 00:23:03.754 He's gonna walk in the door at 2:30 and I haven't seen him for a couple days, 00:23:03.754 --> 00:23:06.904 so he's gonna wanna kind of check in and I'm gonna want to hang out with him. 00:23:06.904 --> 00:23:08.094 And we just do our thing. 00:23:08.094 --> 00:23:12.614 So just try to find that, that, we always talk about work life balance, right? 00:23:12.614 --> 00:23:14.294 It's such a, it's. 00:23:15.494 --> 00:23:20.799 really hard because, there's on the work side I gotta be successful. 00:23:20.799 --> 00:23:24.369 I wanna strive and I wanna do the best I can, but at what cost? 00:23:24.529 --> 00:23:25.369 Candace Dellacona: Absolutely true. 00:23:25.909 --> 00:23:26.269 Yeah. 00:23:27.209 --> 00:23:27.719 I think you're right. 00:23:27.719 --> 00:23:31.229 I think one of my favorite people, Kass Lazaro, who's been on the podcast, she's 00:23:31.229 --> 00:23:34.599 a really interesting businesswoman, talked about the work-life balance being a myth. 00:23:34.599 --> 00:23:35.559 And I think that's partly true. 00:23:35.559 --> 00:23:36.624 You have to figure out a way to integrate. 00:23:37.884 --> 00:23:41.424 And boundaries is one of the things you just brought up, and that's 00:23:41.424 --> 00:23:44.784 one of the lessons that a lot of sandwich generation members have to 00:23:44.784 --> 00:23:46.754 think about and perfect and practice. 00:23:46.754 --> 00:23:50.924 Some of us are terrible at it, some are better, but you know, envisioning 00:23:51.134 --> 00:23:55.019 someone waiting for an email and response is not a great boundary at all. 00:23:55.019 --> 00:24:00.104 And it sounds like you figured it out way in advance of the kids realizing 00:24:00.104 --> 00:24:02.414 it and you do such a good job. 00:24:03.014 --> 00:24:08.694 At being present and, the co-parenting thing is so tricky for so many people. 00:24:08.964 --> 00:24:13.514 And so you have this great partner that, together, you guys are figuring out 00:24:13.964 --> 00:24:15.614 the best way to meet the kids' needs. 00:24:15.664 --> 00:24:17.614 So tell us a little bit about your schedule. 00:24:17.624 --> 00:24:20.984 You travel mostly on the weekends, so you're able to do the 00:24:20.984 --> 00:24:22.304 day-to-day stuff with the kids. 00:24:22.649 --> 00:24:23.029 Dean Blandino: Yeah. 00:24:23.129 --> 00:24:23.379 Yeah. 00:24:23.739 --> 00:24:26.914 That was one of the good things football season is football season. 00:24:26.914 --> 00:24:28.984 I've been doing it since 1994. 00:24:28.984 --> 00:24:32.504 Weekends you're working and that's part of the deal. 00:24:32.864 --> 00:24:36.234 The way the schedule is now, we have a game on Sunday. 00:24:36.234 --> 00:24:40.014 I'm either leaving Friday or Saturday, depending on where that game is in 00:24:40.014 --> 00:24:41.904 relation to, I'm in Southern California. 00:24:43.124 --> 00:24:43.844 we do the game. 00:24:43.844 --> 00:24:47.804 I'm home Sunday night and then I have the week I work from home, I 00:24:47.804 --> 00:24:51.764 can get the boys ready for school and I can take them where they need to 00:24:51.764 --> 00:24:53.894 be and be here when they get home. 00:24:54.734 --> 00:24:58.104 And just continue to build that schedule out and make sure they have 00:24:58.104 --> 00:25:01.974 that consistency and communicating as a co-parent and making sure 00:25:01.974 --> 00:25:03.054 that we're being consistent. 00:25:03.054 --> 00:25:07.464 And like I said, I'm just trying to, she carried the water for a 00:25:07.464 --> 00:25:11.374 very long time for, while I was working and doing other things. 00:25:11.374 --> 00:25:14.404 And I'm just trying to like, make up for that and continue to just be the 00:25:14.404 --> 00:25:18.284 best co-parent and best father I can be, which is, I know that's what we 00:25:18.284 --> 00:25:21.254 all, whatever, when we have kids, we want to, we wanna do that for them. 00:25:21.254 --> 00:25:25.514 And, the schedule is so much easier now in terms of being able to have that time. 00:25:25.944 --> 00:25:29.724 You miss things like things on the weekends, whether it's flag football 00:25:29.724 --> 00:25:33.534 or wrestling or whatever else they're doing, you do miss those things, 00:25:33.534 --> 00:25:37.449 but you do have more time during the week to, to make those moments up. 00:25:38.109 --> 00:25:39.069 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, for sure. 00:25:39.069 --> 00:25:39.909 I think you're right. 00:25:39.909 --> 00:25:43.209 I think we're all just doing the best we can and you have to be kind 00:25:43.209 --> 00:25:46.899 to yourself and think about things like boundaries and pitching in with 00:25:46.929 --> 00:25:48.819 whomever's, helping you with the kids. 00:25:49.189 --> 00:25:50.179 Be there for yourself. 00:25:50.179 --> 00:25:54.994 So my last sort of question is, how do you manage for yourself? 00:25:54.994 --> 00:25:56.584 How do you practice self-care? 00:25:56.584 --> 00:25:59.524 What do you do to make sure that you're in a good space? 00:25:59.554 --> 00:26:03.674 You appeared on the the podcast talking about Unbreakable. 00:26:03.674 --> 00:26:07.604 Jake Glazer does a great job about the mental health aspect, so you 00:26:07.604 --> 00:26:08.334 share a little bit about that. 00:26:09.154 --> 00:26:09.994 Dean Blandino: Yeah, absolutely. 00:26:09.994 --> 00:26:16.244 And I think a lot of people from, what am I'm Gen X, right? 00:26:16.274 --> 00:26:16.754 Gen X 00:26:16.814 --> 00:26:18.014 Candace Dellacona: Yeah, I think you're Gen X, yeah. 00:26:18.014 --> 00:26:18.364 Dean Blandino: Gen X. 00:26:18.384 --> 00:26:22.564 I think and especially like our parents, I think my father, 00:26:23.584 --> 00:26:25.324 they're incredible dad, right? 00:26:25.324 --> 00:26:25.744 Incredible. 00:26:25.744 --> 00:26:28.324 But there wasn't, a lot of, I love yous. 00:26:28.324 --> 00:26:30.904 It wasn't a lot of, it was like, okay, come on, you fell. 00:26:31.384 --> 00:26:32.374 Come on, dust it off. 00:26:32.374 --> 00:26:33.094 Let's go. 00:26:33.144 --> 00:26:34.614 And so you have that. 00:26:35.534 --> 00:26:38.204 And then there was my mom who was like, too far the other way. 00:26:38.204 --> 00:26:40.874 It was like, oh my God, you stubbed your toe, let me take you to the hospital. 00:26:40.874 --> 00:26:46.184 So you try to, I gravitated more towards my dad's style and so you keep things 00:26:46.184 --> 00:26:50.244 in and again, I learned the hard way that you can't do that and you have 00:26:50.244 --> 00:26:54.224 to take time for yourself to just make sure that you're in a good state. 00:26:54.254 --> 00:26:56.254 'cause if you're not in a good state of mind, you're 00:26:56.254 --> 00:26:57.359 not gonna be good for anybody. 00:26:58.074 --> 00:26:58.364 Candace Dellacona: Yeah. 00:26:58.494 --> 00:26:59.844 Dean Blandino: You're certainly not gonna be good for the 00:26:59.844 --> 00:27:01.164 people that are closest to you. 00:27:01.714 --> 00:27:04.444 In my role as head of officiating, there's a lot of stress. 00:27:04.444 --> 00:27:05.734 It was a lot of negativity. 00:27:06.184 --> 00:27:10.574 I think we were talking about it earlier before we started recording, but, I did 00:27:10.574 --> 00:27:12.614 standup comedy back in the nineties. 00:27:12.644 --> 00:27:17.389 Humor was always a big thing for me to diffuse situations and 00:27:17.399 --> 00:27:19.109 bring things to a better place. 00:27:19.469 --> 00:27:21.209 And then just, now it's really important. 00:27:21.219 --> 00:27:24.009 I'll wake up, get the kids to school, and then I'm gonna go work out. 00:27:24.009 --> 00:27:28.149 That's a big thing for me is just I, getting that, getting some exercise, 00:27:28.149 --> 00:27:33.264 doing something every morning, get my day started that way, feel good about that. 00:27:33.289 --> 00:27:36.379 And then doing the rest of the day and always taking the approach of, I 00:27:36.379 --> 00:27:38.599 want every interaction that I have. 00:27:38.659 --> 00:27:42.239 I know some, it is probably not reasonable, but I want every 00:27:42.389 --> 00:27:45.629 interaction I have to be a positive one with other people. 00:27:45.629 --> 00:27:50.829 And the only time I fail at that is when I'm driving because too many 00:27:50.829 --> 00:27:52.209 people don't know how to drive. 00:27:52.209 --> 00:27:54.339 But other than that, I try to stick to that 00:27:54.714 --> 00:27:56.454 Candace Dellacona: Is that a California thing, Dean, or is that 00:27:57.234 --> 00:27:59.784 Dean Blandino: I think it's everywhere, but definitely in California. 00:28:00.224 --> 00:28:02.414 But try to maintain that positivity. 00:28:02.414 --> 00:28:05.924 'cause I'm surrounded by a lot of negativity for a long time in that role. 00:28:06.334 --> 00:28:07.744 Just by nature, not 00:28:07.954 --> 00:28:08.404 Candace Dellacona: Yeah. 00:28:08.454 --> 00:28:09.784 Dean Blandino: because people are bad or whatever. 00:28:09.784 --> 00:28:10.844 Candace Dellacona: Right, Yeah. 00:28:11.489 --> 00:28:13.979 Dean Blandino: So just trying to stay positive, trying to 00:28:14.069 --> 00:28:15.389 have those positive connections. 00:28:15.389 --> 00:28:19.159 Surround yourself with people that negativity is just not 00:28:19.159 --> 00:28:20.239 something I want in my life. 00:28:20.869 --> 00:28:25.009 Don't want drama in my life, and sometimes it's impossible to avoid at all, but just 00:28:25.059 --> 00:28:30.759 surround myself with good people, keep my circle small to those people and yeah, 00:28:30.759 --> 00:28:32.259 and just do the best we can every day. 00:28:32.259 --> 00:28:33.849 I mean, it sounds cliche, but that's kind of 00:28:33.939 --> 00:28:34.389 Candace Dellacona: No, no. 00:28:34.489 --> 00:28:36.109 You said a couple of really important things. 00:28:36.109 --> 00:28:40.749 You said finding humor and I can attest that you're one of the funniest people 00:28:40.749 --> 00:28:44.379 in a group of people that I know, and I'm sure some of the guys will disagree, but 00:28:44.919 --> 00:28:50.569 strenuously objecting, but you are and really just allowing yourself to laugh. 00:28:50.569 --> 00:28:54.849 And you were in a position certainly in officiating where half the 00:28:54.849 --> 00:28:56.199 people were gonna be mad at you. 00:28:56.854 --> 00:29:01.834 And knowing that and being able to move on from it, going for that workout, 00:29:01.864 --> 00:29:05.464 turning inward when you have to, and making sure that you have people 00:29:05.464 --> 00:29:08.464 that will be honest with you and also help you and be there for you. 00:29:08.464 --> 00:29:12.609 So those are all good lessons to take away and boundaries, which was, you. 00:29:13.104 --> 00:29:15.909 Dean Blandino: Yeah, and also don't read the comments on social 00:29:15.909 --> 00:29:20.259 media that do not even today, I don't even make the calls anymore. 00:29:20.259 --> 00:29:22.729 I'm just explaining them and I get blamed. 00:29:22.729 --> 00:29:24.319 So stay off the comments. 00:29:24.859 --> 00:29:27.349 Candace Dellacona: I've seen notes, I've seen them seen, and most of 00:29:27.349 --> 00:29:30.849 them are, I would say that the people who adore you are right in there 00:29:30.849 --> 00:29:32.464 with you and really wanna reply. 00:29:32.464 --> 00:29:33.364 But we know better. 00:29:33.424 --> 00:29:36.844 And you're a good egg, Dean Blandino, and we're really happy that you were 00:29:36.844 --> 00:29:41.854 able to join us today and impart some wisdom for our listeners, for the fans. 00:29:41.854 --> 00:29:43.504 So thanks so much for your time. 00:29:43.744 --> 00:29:44.854 Dean Blandino: Thanks for having me. 00:29:44.854 --> 00:29:45.974 And yeah, anytime. 00:29:45.974 --> 00:29:49.674 I'd love to come back and just check in every once in a while. 00:29:50.289 --> 00:29:50.919 Candace Dellacona: That sounds good. 00:29:51.399 --> 00:29:52.119 Thanks so much. 00:29:56.759 --> 00:30:00.299 Don't forget to subscribe to the Sandwich Generation Survival Guide. 00:30:00.419 --> 00:30:04.649 A new episode drops each month, and if you're enjoying it, please don't forget to 00:30:04.649 --> 00:30:09.059 leave me a five star review and share with your fellow Sandwich Generation members. 00:30:09.569 --> 00:30:14.724 For a complete listing of podcast episodes, you can check out any podcast 00:30:14.724 --> 00:30:21.384 platform, or you can head to my website at www.sandwichgenerationlaw.com. 00:30:21.744 --> 00:30:22.644 Thanks for listening.