Well, hello all you beautiful people.
You know what time it is.
Ladies and gents, guys and dolls and
everyone in between.
Gather around. Get you something real
nice to sip on and comfy to slip on.
Cuz it's time for Smite Club. Here's
your hosts, Chelsea and Hannah.
Hey everybody and welcome to Smut Club.
I'm Hannah.
And I'm Chelsea and this is the show
where we are two licensed professional
counselors and life coaches who like
daydrinking and reviewing romance novels
of varying caliber.
Nailed it.
Nailed it. We've almost 100 episodes in.
finally really solidifying our our
elevator pitch.
I really uh appreciate the dedication to
and I feel like each time we just like
change one word.
Yeah. Yeah.
Get a little tighter, a little better,
you know?
Yeah. Today felt good.
Good.
But also there are episodes where I'm
like we are almost 100 episodes in and
I'm still [ __ ] this [ __ ] up.
So today did feel I'm like oh we made
it. Y'all, that's how you know this
episode is about to be amazing.
Yeah, the energy is good. We've started
strong
vibing.
Yeah, there's no way it can get derailed
now. What book is it, by the way? I
know.
It sounds like you were setting me up
for a joke right there. There's no way
it can be derailed now. What book is it?
You know, it wasn't my intention, but I
did pause and go, I don't actually know
what we're reviewing today.
It is called The Alpha's Savior by Reese
Breeden.
Breeden. Braden.
Breeden.
Yeah.
Breeden out there. Okay. Is it reverse
heron?
No. No. But there was a um
a tweet the other day where the National
Park Service had posted a thing about
like um help needed for a breeding
specialist for black bears or something
like that and somebody
comment section I bet was incredible.
Yes. So, so one person responded and
they were like, "I'm begging you. Please
change the wording of this." And
somebody responded to that and was like,
"Shut up, hetero."
And I was like, "Oh, sweet Jesus." Like,
it was very good. It was very good. I
enjoyed it.
I was hoping that the comment was just
going to be like, "I'm begging you.
Please do not
just shut up.
Shut up, Hero.
Don't ruin this for the rest of us. And
then somebody else was like, "Get out of
my way straight."
I was like, "Wow,
it feels like the flag in at the college
and community."
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. E plurabus
anus.
Yes.
Yeah.
It's a butthole.
He kept not seeing it.
So, uh, my niece's
boyfriend just started taking classes at
the local college and him just like saw
him after his first day. Just happened
to be over at their house. I was like,
"How was your first day?" He's like,
"Everyone there was so weird." And I'm
like, "So, there's this show called
Community. It came out a long time ago,
but I really think it's going to
normalize experience."
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. I was like, "Oh, it will give you
all of the validation and normalization
that you need."
Mhm. Mhm. From top to bottom.
Yes. Okay. Sorry. I recognize that I I'm
like, why am I always leading up on a
community?
I'm always derailing us with community,
which I encourage and appreciate. So,
um, this is a shifter
romance. Okay. Um, so Haley is our
female main character. What kind of
shifter?
Wolf.
I see. Okay. Listen, Suzanne. Right.
There's so many different like I'm like
you get like a red panda shifter.
You do. Yeah.
Also easier to say.
Yeah. Yeah. There was the raccoon dog
shifter.
The tanuki. Is that what that's called?
My husband would know. It's a Japanese
I starts with a t.
Sure.
I I feel relatively confident because my
I don't feel confident either way.
So, um fun fact, our podcast is produced
by Fight Entertainment.
It is.
Um and the logo for Fight Entertainment
is a Tanuki.
It is.
I do kind of want to say Tuzuki, but
when I say Tuzuki, that feels very
wrong. And I would bet
It sounds like a Greek dip
with a little feta on it. Yeah, you get
it.
Your tuzuki your
that you always have with lamb.
Oh man.
Okay. So, it's a wolf.
It's a Yes, it's a wolf shifter. And it
is not um shifters are not known in this
world, right?
So, they live in secret.
They live in secret and separate sort of
communities.
Okay.
Um but they're still part of their town.
They're just, you know, separate in a
lot of ways. So Haley is our female main
character and she's out for a jog and
she is strictly human. We learn here
that um she just moved to this town. She
kind of picked it at random.
She's just settling in all that kind of
stuff. So she's getting to know the town
by going for a jog, whatever. And she
sees like basically disaster it is
happening in front of her where a little
boy runs out in front of a car.
Oh.
And she immediately starts doing
calculations and she's like, I'm too far
away. Like this is about to be really
bad when this guy comes like barreling
out of nowhere and pushes the kid out of
the way. But he gets hit. M
and when he gets hit, he like rolls down
this embankment and she's like, "Oh
god." Like right past her. And so she
runs after him and sees that he's fallen
into the river. It's like, oh, horrible.
Well, that escalated quickly.
Real swift, right?
So, she's immediately like, I got to get
him out. Like, that's that's what I got
to do. I'm the closest one. And so she
jumps in and is able to get him out and
starts doing CPR until help arrives
immediately. Like when the paramedics
show up, another guy who is this person
who we learn is his name is Cooper is
the guy who got hit.
Okay.
Cooper's best friend Ethan shows up and
he's like freaking out. The paramedics
are like, "You're gonna have to follow
us." Like it's clearly he's really
really hurt. Like this is really bad.
And so as soon as they get him into the
ambulance, Haley collapses
because this is like
cold. It's getting into the colder
months, she just jumped into a river
and, you know, hauled a dude who's
probably twice her size. You know, she
like her like
the exhaustion, the adrenaline, the
Okay.
So she just basically falls out. And
listen, I'm would prefer it be that one.
And then she I'm like, "Oh no." Like
then I was like, "Oh, she fell out for
the logical reasons."
Yes. Yes. For like, "Oh my god." Yeah.
She like, "Holy [ __ ] this just
happened." Like crazy.
So the best friend essentially catches
her and is like, "I'm taking you to the
hospital." And then she blacks out. So
he follows the ambulance. She wakes up
in the hospital. Um the best friend is
there and he's like I just wanted to say
like you don't understand what you've
done for me, for my family, for our
community. Like
thank you so much for saving him. Like
if you ever need anything, we are going
to be there. Like every single one of
us, you just say the word.
And um Haley turns out got hypothermia
um and a couple of other you know like
exhaustion related things. So she's
getting treated
smaller lacerations if you will.
Yeah. Yeah. Just from the
the activity.
A lot of jostling.
A lot of jostling. That's it. Um and so
the as Ethan I forgot to mention this is
dual point of view which does matter at
some points. But as Ethan is like
earnestly like holding her hand like
thank you so much. She's like is he
hitting on me? Like what is happening?
He's thanking me too emphatically. Like
it feels
deeper than just a thank you.
A lot of eye contact. She's like,
"Good sir, I have hypothermia."
She's like, "Your hands are so warm."
Um she's like, "It's weird, but maybe
get a little closer. I'm freezing."
Yeah. Um but you know, she just is like,
"Hey, no worries. I just did what
you know um I'm glad he's going to be
okay cuz the best friend says like looks
like he's going to fully recover like
you got to blah blah blah.
So then we switch to Cooper's point of
view. So he wakes up in the hospital as
well. His sister is a doctor there and
so um she's checking on him
and Ethan comes in and Cooper
immediately loses his [ __ ] He's like,
"Why do you smell like my mate? Like,
you're not my mate, obviously. So, where
the [ __ ] is she?" And Ethan is like,
"Uh,
maybe simmer down." Like,
Ethan's like, "Good to see you alive,
man.
Happy happy to be here."
I was just thanking your mate
emphatically for saving your life.
He's like, "Didn't know she was your
mate. And even if I did know that, I
figure you wouldn't want me to let her
fall and get a concussion because you
don't want me to touch her.
You're welcome for bringing your mate to
the hospital to get checked out and make
sure she's fine.
So Cooper's got like bruised ribs and a
broken leg and all this stuff, but he's
like, I got to go. She's here in the
hospital. She's hurt. Like I got to get
up. I got to go to her. Right. So while
they live in secret, their mates can
be human and not actually shifters as
well.
Yes. So we learn in later books cuz this
is a series and it follows um Haley and
her sisters um and then one of well the
sister Cooper's sister Ila uh she gets a
book too. Um and so does Ethan but um
I mean Ethan deserves a book after all
he's done already. He's very precious
actually. So,
um,
yes, but we find out later in the lore
that like you have to have some shifter
DNA in there somewhere, but it
trace amounts of shifter.
Yeah. It could be generations and
generations back.
Someone had a shifter inside them
generations ago and
and so do you just a smaller one?
I don't know. just a smaller shifter.
Oh, Cooper might take offense to that.
Oh no.
Um,
but Ethan basically is the voice of
reason throughout all of this. And he's
like, "Hey man, she thinks you're human.
Your mate is human." And Cooper's like,
"What? My what?" Like,
cuz it's very, very rare. It's possible,
but it's very rare. So, um,
okay. He's like, "Oh." And so Ethan's
like, "If you come hopping into her
hospital room after she just watched you
get hit by a truck and almost drown,
she's going to freak out." Like, just to
be clear, cuz he will heal all of this
likely within a week
um at most. And so he's already starting
to feel better. I think we could deem
Ethan's insight and judgment as intact.
Yes. Yeah.
As good.
Yes. Which is why Ethan is the beta and
Cooper is the alpha of this pack.
I was I mean I was assuming that well
the you don't know what you've done for
me and my community. I'm like okay. So
who is Cooper to their community? He's
clearly like
who is he going to be? He's going to be
important somewhere. So that makes
sense. He's the alpha of their pack.
Yeah, that is a important role.
Yes. And so, um,
Cooper is like, "Fine, I guess, but I
need you to watch her." He's like,
"That's basically your only job right
now is to make sure that she's safe."
Because there's a lot of um like
political tension right now within the
pack and like with other packs in the
area. And he's like, "If anybody were to
find out that like my mate is human and
unbonded and unprotected, like that
could be really bad." So like he's
freaking out, which I just like I love
how quickly these books shift cuz I'm
like, "Bro, 2 hours ago you didn't even
know she was alive. She was as safe as
could be and just like living her life."
And now you're like, "I know of her
existence. She's not safe anymore." And
I'm like, "Wait, what?
What?
Nothing. Nothing has changed.
No. No. Just the fact that you know, but
maybe if you shut up about it, nobody
else will know,
right? And like maybe if only like you
and Ethan and Ila keep this under wraps.
Like
Yeah. Everybody shut up. Like
Yeah. It's not a huge safety concern.
No. Um and actually, so I forgot to
mention, which is not like super
important for the story, but I thought
was interesting. the his family
basically owns like a huge construction
business that is extremely
well off.
Okay.
And so they have donated so much money
to the local hospital that they
basically have their own wing that's
shifter only, which is why Leila works
there.
It's very rare they actually need
services like that, but they can't have
regular human doctors working on them
when it does happen. Um, you know, I
appreciate that detail cuz I feel like
that is something that a lot of books
would just like overlook and you're
like, "Wait, what? How?" And they just
don't notice and you're like, "Oh, no.
This makes more sense." They have their
own wing.
Yeah. They're all shifters or mates of
shifters or whatever. So, um, all the
doctors and nurses in that part of the
hospital. Um, so Haley, we're back to
her. She gets released from the hospital
and she is overwhelmed by the response
from the town. She's literally like the
town hero. Like she goes to get
something to eat. People are picking up
the bill. She tries to go to work. Her
boss tells her, "No, absolutely not. You
get as much time off as you need. You
come back whenever you want." Like,
so did she know who Cooper was before
any of this? no idea cuz she literally
like just moved here. Um,
valid.
And so she's like, "All right." Like um
and um so she sees Ethan again, like
he's bringing her some of her belongings
and stuff that were left by the river
and things like that, checking on her.
Um, and he seems pretty nice, but
overall she's just like shaken and is
like, "Yeah, who did I save?" Because
people are losing their ever loving
minds. Like he's he's it's just a dude.
Yeah. You're like,
it was just the kind human thing to do.
I didn't know I was like saving someone
important. I just like saw
a tragedy and did what I could to help
in that moment. And now my tab is
getting picked up.
Yeah. She's like, "Is he the mayor?"
Like, "What is happening right now?" Um,
and so, um,
I mean, kind of if you think about it,
a little bit. Yeah. Um, and so Cooper is
having a really difficult time like
being away from her because like the
pull is so strong now that he knows that
she is out there. Like it's really
difficult
her at some level.
Yeah. So, I guess when she when he first
was revived by the river, I guess he
smelled her, but like he really smelled
her on Ethan,
which would also make sense because her
mouth was on him like she was performing
CPR. So,
yeah,
I guess that that could
Mhm.
awakened the pull of a mating bond.
There it is. Yes. Yes. Um,
so, um, he decides, his dad is very
supportive. They're a very tight-knit
family. And so after his dad kind of
talks him down, he decides he's going to
shift and go sleep outside her house. Um
because he's like, "I know I can't be
with her, but I can be like near her."
Um and so
um he is like formulating a plan to take
it slow. How do I approach her? What
does that look like? How do I tell her
that I'm a shifter? like he's like
really planning the next 3 to 5 years
for them and she is like unaware.
She's like, "Wow, I really saved someone
important." Huh.
Yeah, cool. I got an extra day off of
work. That's nice. like
um and so
um he again he's like it is way too
dangerous for her like for us to
announce that I found my mate until we
have like she's been marked and bonded
and all that stuff.
Okay.
Um and also his mom is going to go
insane like
that she's human
or just in general. just in general,
he's like she's immediately going to as
soon as she knows she exists, she's
going to start like fitting her for a
dress and like asking when we're going
to have babies and stuff. Um, and
actually my next note is no one seems
concerned that she's human. So in this
community like
faded mates is above all else. like it's
possible to have like a chosen mate,
okay?
But um for the most part, like 100%
completely, it doesn't matter where they
come from or what they look like. If
they are your faded mate, they will be
accepted by the community. Um
and so yeah, he that's convenient.
I always find books interest like
because I remember I was talking about a
book I don't think we ever reviewed it
but talking about one off pod
a while back where like they were made
like they like weren't attracted to
their mate and like didn't even like end
up with their like
I don't know cuz so many of the books
are like well we're made and like their
scent is so incredible and I'm like
yeah like what happens if you're like
[ __ ] really them
yeah so that does happen in some of the
later books and that's part of why I
really enjoyed the series overall. Even
though there were a couple of things I
wasn't a big fan of,
it was just really interesting. She did
like a rejected mate and like um a mate
who was like really this guy like kind
of energy. Um and so yeah, I just
enjoyed like the range that we got from
it, you know?
Well, cuz I also feel like a lot of them
will do like the
we they were like fighting their
attraction and then like something
Yeah. switches or flips and they like
suddenly realize it was their faded mate
all along, but like something was like
blocking them or whatever,
blocking the channel for them to like
have that. And I'm like, oh, I'm just
always curious how different authors
choose choose to write their own version
of it.
And so I do like this one where it's
like, hey,
they're faded.
Yeah,
that does
that's it. Yeah, we're going to work
through a lot for a faded mate. Yes.
Yeah. And so, um, that's like each one
of these books in the series is like a
different
like major trope, but I like her frame
on all of them. They're really
interesting. Um, but
and remind me of the author's name.
Reese Breeden.
Breeden. Yep.
Yep. That's the one. Don't know how I
forgot. So the next morning, Haley goes
to step outside and she sees this
massive black wolf and um she's like,
"It's really pretty.
I should be much more frightened than I
am, but like she's like, "It's not
posturing at me. It's like several
hundred feet away." Like,
yeah, it it doesn't seem to currently be
posing a threat to me, but I should also
probably
be leerier. Yeah.
Lerier is more leery.
Oh, okay. Going to look that one up
later.
Be more hesitant.
Cautious. Be more cautious than I
currently am.
Um, so
I know how to use those grammatically.
Trepidacious.
Um,
so she just writes the wolf off. She's
like, "Oh, I didn't know there were
wolves in the area. I will be more
mindful on my runs." And goes to the
hardware store. So the house that she
bought is a big Victorian and she her
dream is to turn it into a B&B.
So she works as an accountant.
Okay.
Um but that's the dream is to start her
own B&B. So the place needs a lot of
work and so she's, you know, doing her
thing in the hardware store and Ethan
shows up. Um and he gets very weird.
He's like a bed and breakfast like
strangers in your house. Oh. Oh, he's
like, "Okay." She's like, "This dude is
[ __ ] weird." Like, she's like, "Yeah,
it's a normal business model. I didn't
invent it."
The the bed part of a bed and breakfast
is pretty important. It's the first bee,
bud. Like, you know, she's like,
if they don't sleep there and they just
come for breakfast, it's just a
restaurant.
It's just Jay Christopher's at that
point, you know?
It's just a restaurant I sleep in. H
just a J Christopher.
That was a deep cut. That was deep. All
right. But for those it lands with,
it'll land so well.
Yeah. Yeah. Which I feel like is the
secondary tagline of our entire podcast.
Maybe our entire being.
Yes. That too. Not even not even podcast
related
that too. Yeah. Um Yeah. So Ethan, she's
still like, "What is this dude's deal?
This is so weird, bro."
And she's like leaving and driving away.
He like helps her load her car and stuff
and she's like almost home and she's
like, "Ethan didn't buy anything.
What is happening?" She's like, "I don't
like it. I don't like it." But then
I Okay, I appreciate that she has
situational awareness.
Yes. Yeah. She's like again, is he
hitting on me? Was the whole like we are
forever in your debt thing like a real
life thing? Do these people believe?
I just thought he was grateful. I didn't
think that meant he was going to follow
me around to different stores and help
me load my car.
I didn't know he was going to be my
personal assistant. Um, so then a few
days later when um, Haley is back at
work, Cooper's mom shows up at her
office um, and is absolutely
she's just at like a local accounting
firm in town.
Yeah. Um, so
mom is just absolutely like gushing with
gratitude like, "Let me take you out to
coffee. Like, let me do this." And Haley
is like, "No, thank you." She's like,
"Wow." But the mom is like, "Well, I
know you can't just leave work right
now. I understand that." But it's
actually Cooper's sister's birthday
coming up. You're coming to that. You're
gonna come to the party. You're
So, does mom already know it's his mate?
No. Mom is just
This is just her energy.
She's just so much. Yeah. Throughout all
of it, she's so much. Um, and so, but
Haley also, she hasn't really made any
friends yet. And so, she's like, "All
right, like I'll go to this this woman's
birthday." like that sounds nice, you
know, um
you know, going to the party. He's like,
"So, how do you know the birthday girl?"
Okay, so like a couple weeks ago, her
brother almost died. I'm the one who
saved him.
Yeah. Do you read the paper about how he
fell in the river? That was me that got
him out of the river.
When it said someone did CPR, I was the
someone.
Yes. Um, and she's like, people are
sending her flowers and like it's really
a lot and she's really like does not
understand what's happening. But
then the sheriff shows up. His name is
Marcus. They are friends. Haley and
Marcus are friends. Okay. And the mom
kind of gets a little like side eye
because um Marcus like brings her a
coffee. He's like, "I was checking on
you. How are you doing?" And the mom
immediately is like, "Oh, obviously."
Like I see.
a little something something.
Yeah. So, when she was inviting her, it
was just out of gratitude. It wasn't
even to like set her up with Cooper. It
was just like, "You don't know people.
You're new."
Yeah.
We love you so much for what you did.
Come to this birthday.
Yeah.
And now she's like, "Okay." So, her and
the sheriff,
she's like, "I do like Marcus. He's a
very handsome man." Like, as soon as he
leaves and Haley is like, "Okay."
Um,
so it's now 3 weeks after the accident
and Cooper is finally going to go meet
Haley. He's got like a a boot on or a
cast or whatever on one leg, but he's
like, "She'll never know." Oh, like she
won't understand. Like, I'll just tell
her it wasn't as bad as everybody
thought. Like, Mhm.
3 weeks later, your neardeath accident,
you're down to a boot.
Yeah. All your internal bleeding and
organs are just no problem.
I mean, here's the thing. It sounds
silly, but I also know you recently had
emergency gallbladder surgery. And when
you showed up at my house, like within a
couple weeks, I was like, she looks far
perkier than I anticipated. So, maybe
Cooper's on to something.
Maybe. So, maybe so. Um,
so glad you're well.
Thank you. Me, too. Um, I still do have
random twinges and it's like the the
final sutures are going away, but it's
really only when I'm laying down at
night if I like move certain ways. So, I
kind of forget. Yeah. Right. Exactly.
I'm like,
you literally text me that you were
having like emergency surgery and then
the next time I saw you, I'm like, "Oh,
did do I have a misunderstanding of what
emergency surgery entails?" because
Hannah's just
back up and moving.
Yeah. Yeah. The first week was rough,
but after that it was really fine.
Um, and oh my gosh. So, because I no
longer have a gallbladder, as we have
discussed, certain foods don't sit very
well anymore. And Matt, I got really
upset one day cuz I can't drink coffee
anymore. And the next day, Matt came
home and he was like, "I did some
research and I found you these
supplements at a shop in town. They are
gallbladder enzymes that are supposed to
help you so that you and so he keeps
asking me he's like, "Have you tried the
coffee yet?" And I'm like, "Still no
because I haven't had a day where I'm
just at home."
You're like, "I'm not going to chance it
on a work day."
Right. I'm not going to chance it before
I go to Chelsea's.
Also, have you tried mushroom coffee?
No, but I've been doing a lot of reading
about it. Yeah. Yeah, I may try that
out. I also guess like not consuming
lots of caffeine is probably better for
all of us instead of finding other
alternatives.
Yeah.
Through which we can mainline it.
Yeah. Yeah. Um I I am trying all
different sorts of things right now. But
that was just so cute that he was like
so excited to to bring that home.
Your husband is the most precious.
I know. He is the purest person.
I know.
Yeah. cuz he text me for the first like
he and I had never Why would we be
texting, right? We've literally never
actually been in the same room, right?
Uh but when you were having your
surgery, it was funny cuz you told me he
would be texting me at some point and I
was like, "Okay, sure." Like I know
you're having surgery.
Okay. Like I appreciate. Well, I was
like, if something's really bad and I
can't go back to work and I can't text,
but the way in which she text, she's
like, I'm so sorry it's taken me so long
to reach out. And in my head, I'm like,
what?
Matt, nothing. There was nothing to
reach out about sooner, my dear. Like,
oh my gosh, why are you apologizing?
Your wife is having emergencies.
I probably didn't communicate very well
about like that. It really wasn't that
deep. Like, it was really only if things
got bad. I Because I was pretty high.
You were on a lot of pain meds.
Oh god. Cooper did not get to have that
experience of being super high on lots
of drugs. He's really fine.
Well, I bet they metabolize pain meds
differently anyway.
They probably do.
Probably burn through them too fast.
Mhm. Like I feel like
I forget what Shifter series I was
reading, but they were like had to have
like special alcohol cuz they like
couldn't get drunk off normal stuff cuz
their body processed it too quickly.
Mhm. The Honey Badger Shifter series
that I read.
Forgot about that one. Um, the honey
badger shifters have to do special uh
like vodka that's laced with snake venom
because their metabolisms are so crazy
as honey badgers that they just process
alcohol like nothing and most poisons
generally like nothing. And so they have
to lace their alcohol.
Snake venom poison
literally.
Um, but anyway,
and isn't that a great metaphor for
Oh god.
I don't want any more metaphors.
I just want a silly shifter thing. I
just want to have a glass of wine and
not feel guilt about it.
Yes. Um but um so he decides he's going
to go to her house because she's
renovating the whole thing, right? So
she's going to need contractors. He is
part of a contracting company.
Oh, hey, it just happened to hear you
might need a contractor. Let's see. Well
played. And so, um, he is like, as soon
as he starts talking to her, it's a
little bit golden retrievery where
everything she does is like the most
incredible thing he's ever seen. He's
like, "Oh my god, that little hair
falling out of her ponytail is the most
incredible thing that I've ever
experienced." Um, I wish I could just
tuck it back behind her ear for her, but
it's too soon.
Yeah. He's like, "Don't be weird. Put
your hands in your pockets. Don't touch
her."
Yes. Probably. That probably was a line
in there. Um, but he is like getting to
know her a little bit better, learns
that, you know, she's single, um, that
she's new to town. And for some reason,
as he's like going to leave, cuz they
agree like he's going to be by each day
to work on the house and he's cutting
her and deal, whatever. He like goes to
leave and then he's like, "I can't do
it." And turns around and just like
kisses the [ __ ] out of her. And then
he's like, "Okay, I'll see you
tomorrow." And like gets in his truck
and goes home.
So then
she's like, "People show their
appreciation in such weird ways in this
town."
She's like, "Seems like there's some
cultural differences, you know?" So the
next day
also where did she like where is this?
So it's not clear. It seems like maybe
the Northwest like it's got sort of like
Pacific Northwest.
Yeah.
Did she move from somewhere in the
Northwest? Do we know why she up and
relocated?
Not yet.
Okay.
So, she moved like clear across the
country.
Um but
she didn't just move like 30 minutes
over from the next town. She literally
left everything behind. And um that's
part of I skated over when the sheriff
brings her coffee. She's like, "Oh, his
mom thinks we're together. She doesn't
realize like there's more going on
here." Like,
yeah,
it it could be bad that my name was in
the paper cuz they did like a story on
her while she was in the hospital. But
like we don't have we don't know
anything else except she moved. just
there's some like light hinting at like
the reason she moved across the country
was not just for a change of scenery.
Yes. And she doesn't like that her name
was in the paper, but what is she going
to do about it? You know, um
let Cooper die next time then.
Yeah. Right. Just stand by. There were
other people there. Um
someone else would have given him CPR
eventually.
It's the bystander effect. Everybody
look it up. It's not real. Actually, all
subsequent research indicated it's not
real.
I like that you mentioned it and then
immediately disputed it.
I mentioned it and then I was like, "Oh
no, I'm perpetuating the lies."
Anyway,
way to hold yourself accountable,
Hannah.
Thank you very much. We practice
rigorous honesty. So the next day he
shows up to her office to take her out
to lunch so they can continue to discuss
like the plans for the house and they
talk about siblings. Haley, so Cooper
has two brothers and a sister.
Okay.
Um he is the second oldest.
Oh,
yep. And his older brother has been kind
of gone. like he just sort of up and
left and we it's not explained here yet,
but he's been gone for like 2 years. Um,
so
did we review another shifter romance
where they were like twin brothers and
then the one was pretending to be the
other one that whole time?
Yeah, I think we did.
The name is escaping me.
Yeah. Well, cuz the one Oh, I did it,
too.
You did? Yeah.
Son of a bulldog.
It's gone. It'll come to me at like two
son of a bulldog.
Thank you.
I was recently thinking about now that
my son parrots what I say a little more
readily.
I was like what creative swear words can
I start
utilizing? There's always Matt's
favorite which is pickles been uh odd
doodles has. That's very good. That's
very good.
Well, a song came up on uh Spotify and I
forget the artist name. I should look it
up and remember it. But the whole thing
is like the doodles I'd undo.
Yes.
One for the dent in the rental car, one
for the joke that I took too far. Like
the doodles I'd undo is the whole
That's so cute. It really is.
I really like that. I really like that.
But it is inspired my like ah doodles.
It works so well with a
2-year-old.
Um, so I So all of Cooper's siblings and
all of Haley's siblings get a book. Um,
so Cooper is explaining his people. Um,
and then Haley shares that she actually
has an identical twin sister. She has
another sister and a brother, but she
kind of throws out there that, um, she
hasn't really seen them in a while. Um,
but she's really hoping she's going to
be able to see them soon. And like
Cooper can tell she's getting a little
bit like down and so he's like something
else.
There's more at play here.
Yeah. But he kind of brushes it aside
cuz he's just like so happy to be in her
presence. So Cooper um shows to her
house daily before the crew and the two
of them have coffee. It's very cute.
He's like sticking to his plan to take
it slow even though he randomly started
making out with her before this. Um,
got to let her know you're interested.
Right.
Right. Right. Right. And then you got to
Yeah. You can't No.
And then you got to back off after that.
Yeah. Just to send the most mixed
signals so she has no idea what's going
on.
Yeah. I mean, I do feel like
walking it back to morning coffee.
Yeah.
I feel like we like start with morning
coffee then grow
Yeah.
to the the kids.
Ideally. Ideally. So, it's been now a
couple of weeks of this.
Oh.
And so, then he tells her that um he'd
like to make her dinner
that night.
And so, it's a very cute little meal
together. And he tells her or no, he's
been he's thinking about like he has no
love life at all. Like he is like purely
virginal because he has been waiting for
his mate. He didn't ever want to bring
in a mate. and then have them have to
deal with like pack members that he'd
slept with and stuff like that.
Did he write I kiss dating goodbye?
No.
He could have though. Probably.
Yeah.
Unrelated, but did you RIP James Dobson?
He just passed recently.
He did. I know
the memes have been
superb,
joyful,
horrible, and hilarious.
Yeah. Yeah.
The contempt felt around the world for
that man could like power a town.
Like if you could harness it, Allah
screams or laughter in Monsters, Inc.
Yeah. Everyone started going, "Take the
shackles off.
Yes.
And if you're wondering what we're
referencing, we did also recently have a
Veggie Tales SM.
We did. We did.
Yeah.
We're really happy you're all here with
us.
Yeah. Thanks for going on this journey
with us.
It's been a good one, I think. Um so um
after dinner they do wind up having kind
of a a steamy make out session but
um he's like hey I need to leave before
I do something ungentlemanly like he
starts to pull back
and she's like who says I want you to be
a gentleman or whatever. So then
fingering to completion
like or spiritually she said something
of that nature and got fingered to
completion.
Yeah. Um lots of dirty talk kind of like
domish like more top energy I guess. Um
big focus on consent like tell me what
you want, tell me where you want it,
like say it out loud, that kind of
stuff. Um
and Haley goes to return the favor. Um,
but Cooper's like, "No, we need to
wait." And she's like,
"Dudes are so weird in this town.
What are you people doing?" I am
literally offering I was listening to a
podcast and they were talking about um
like the decrease in sexual activity in
Gen Z or something like that. And
somebody one of the hosts was like,
"Yeah." So they were like, "They're not
having sex." But they didn't specify
what kind of sex. Like, you know, a
Yankee and a mouth job. They like that's
those weren't options. And the co-host
was like, "I'm sorry. A what and a who?
Like what? What are you saying?"
And I thought of you. Thank you. I'm
honored to be thought of in that moment.
That is a hilarious
way to wear that. Also a fascinating
trend that I didn't know about.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And but I do think
that is also a valid question of like
what?
Yeah. Well, not even what changed, what
constitutes his sex in that study
because yes, a Yankee and a mouth job,
wasn't it?
Yeah, a mouth job.
That does unfortunately feel like how I
would refer to it.
And now I will moving forward.
I love that we have new vernacular. Um,
but no, that is a fascinating
it is really interesting.
Why Why is it decreasing? Is that what
they were? So, they were kind of talking
about that, but they were also talking
about the flaws in the studies. And so,
a lot of what's been reported has maybe
been a little bit skewed and maybe a
little bit like fear-mongery and like,
you know, what's the real information?
And also, does it matter? Like, if they
don't want to have sex and they aren't
having sex, why are we worried about it?
Probably because of the declining birth
rate,
which is a separate issue.
Yeah. I'm
also the same issue.
Oh my god.
Yeah. Well, and also like and I think we
like I grew up with a girl who straight
up was like, "Yeah,
my boyfriend and I have anal all the
time, but like I'm still a virgin."
Right? And I'm like, "Okay, well, so if
that's how we're we're quantifying that
score and they ask you in the survey,
there is going to be a decrease in sex
reported."
Mhm.
Even though you're telling me that went
down in the Ross dressing room,
but sex for Jesus in the Ross dressing
room.
It's for the Lord.
This is has nothing to do with the Lord.
Cooper. Cooper is trying to keep control
of himself.
But also, stop.
You just fingered her to completion.
I know,
bro. You want that [ __ ]
Let her blow you.
So,
why am I trying to convince him?
Well, she's also trying to convince him
throughout the book, which gets tedious
at some point, but
So, this isn't like a one-off. This is
just like his inner
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
So, the next morning, Cooper picks up
Haley for a hike. Um, and um, Haley,
we're in her point of view now, and
she's trying not to get too attached.
She's like,
she should get attached. I mean, she
doesn't she doesn't know that yet, but
like I get her hesitency. And I'm like,
girl,
she's like, I this can just be a s like
a a summer fling or whatever. I forgot
it's cold outside. Um,
well, they did move to the north.
They did. Um, and so she is, um, you
know, trying to be cool and everything.
Um, but he's very sweet and very
attentive. He's very gentle with her.
And, you know, they talk about work and
she actually realizes she's doing some
work for Cooper's dad, like for their
business.
Um, and they're going to go like on a
work conference, and turns out like
Cooper is also on that conference. It's
like a big deal. Um, and um, Haley is
like starting to feel a little bit like
an idiot because she is so into him and
he keeps like putting the brakes on
things and so she's like, I really need
to temper myself here.
Well, it's such mixed signals even
though like I don't
I don't believe Cooper understands that
he's giving
mixed energy.
No, he doesn't.
He like thinks he's being like honorable
and respectful and like and keeping her
safe so people won't know that like you
know make her a target or whatever. Um
and they have a nice just a really nice
time. Um and then um this is the first
introduction of the nickname princess
that we have throughout. Um
okay. It feels like it took a while.
It did take a while. It was a slow build
for that. And then Haley and Ila, the
sister, um later on they're bonding. Um,
they go for a night out and Haley
reveals to Ila that she's been hiding
from a violent stalker ex, which is why
she moved across the country and even
her family doesn't know where she is.
Um, and so she's like, you know, please
don't tell Cooper. Like, I don't want to
scare him off or freak him out. Like,
I'll tell him in my own time. This
doesn't feel like something that Ila
should keep a secret. It's not. But
that's why the sheriff checks on her all
the time because the first thing she did
when she got to town was introduce
herself to the sheriff and tell him the
situation. So, she's more thinking from
like a romantic standpoint. They've
known each other for like a couple of
months maybe. They're like
just starting to get to know each other
romantically. She's not even sure if
he's actually invested. He's only
digitally penetrated her at this point.
Not digital penetration.
Digital digital get.
Um so, um Cooper is anxious to get to
the bar because he's going to crash
girls night because of course he is. Um
but he has to pick up his big brother
from the airport. Um
Oh, who's coming back?
Yes, he's coming back. So, the brother
has been traveling because his mate
rejected him.
um and is essentially that's essentially
unheard of like in their
Yeah.
species like that does not happen. And
so he declined alpha and left and nobody
really knows where he's been or what
he's been doing all that time.
Just a rambling man.
Yeah, literally. Um so all the siblings
and Ethan are at the bar. Um, Cooper is
just enjoying spending time with her
with his family. It just feels really
nice. Um, and then Cooper gets hit on by
a female pack member um, who's very
obviously trying to put the moves on him
while he's like got his arm like behind
Haley's chair. He's not demonstrating
that they're together.
He's not like claiming her, but he's
also not
distancing himself. But I, you know, I
had that thought earlier when you
mentioned like he has been single and
hasn't really engaged in dating. I'm
like, "Oh." And then he his brother
takes off, he becomes the alpha.
I imagine a lot of uh women in that pack
would love to be the pack alpha. Like
they're they're really trying. A lot of
them are. So um the girl kind of
realizes that he seems to be focused on
Haley and dumps her drink on her. Um and
is like
that's shitty. Like while Haley's on her
way to the bar, she like runs into her
and like dumps her drink and is
basically like, you know, you mean
nothing to a man like Cooper. Like you
could never satisfy him. Blah blah blah.
Um and Haley was like, okay, so we're
just having fun then. I'm still winning
that. So thank you.
Yeah, that's always like such an
interesting
Yeah. dynamic that I feel like happens
in books more than I'm like does this
actually happen in the real world?
Not that I've ever experienced.
I'm also like you aren't like
Yeah. Okay. So, you'll never satisfy a
man like that. But like he's clearly
sitting with his arm around your chair.
Like
Yeah.
Does he know you'll never satisfy him
like that?
Yeah.
Yeah. But also like
it makes me think of um I just watched
some something maybe on Tik Tok recently
when this woman got like she was really
upset about some situation and then she
went I can't believe this [ __ ] out here
got me defending a man
and I was like
okay all right I very much enjoyed that
the psychiatrist I fell in love with my
psychiatrist. Yeah.
Well, and once again, we set up like as
soon as it started sh I fell in love
with my psychiatrist. I was like, "This
is not on your psychiatrist." I can
already tell from where we're starting,
this is a a a heavy sprinkling of
cluster B.
Yeah. It was bizarre to watch cuz she'd
be like, "His boundaries were
immaculate." And that's why
that's how he was showing me.
Yeah.
What?
Oh, yeah. the delusional gymnastics that
that were being done. But yes, the y'all
got me got me out here defending a man.
Really? Yeah. This poor psych
psychiatrist,
not a psychologist, psychiatrist. I'm
like, this man is just trying to see his
patients.
He's like, I literally am just trying to
give you aderall. Get out of my face.
What is happening?
Oh.
So,
um, that whole thing happens and Haley
immediately like is over it and just is
moving on, dancing, having a good time,
but the sheriff is there and Cooper gets
weird vibes because the sheriff seems to
be watching Haley. Um, and so he goes
over and he's like, "Um, are you into
her? Are you guys together?" Whatever.
So, everyone is posturing at this bar.
Yes. Yes. And Marcus is like, "No, she
needs friends, Cooper. Like, she's been
through a lot. Maybe pull back. Like,
you need to chill out."
Um, and he was also like, "By the way, I
can smell the mates on you. Like, you
need to be honest with her, like
straight up." Um cuz the sheriff is a
bear shifter and so his sense of smell
is a lot stronger and he's not part of
the pack which is why he feels free to
speak to the alpha that way. Um
so um he like Marcus keeps saying like
she needs someone right now like you
need to just show up for her like quit
doing this weird thing whatever you're
doing. And Cooper is like what is he
talking about? Like I don't
It's almost like she lived a whole life
before she showed up in your city a
couple months ago, my dude.
She didn't just materialize to give me
CPR specifically
like some kind of lame water nymph that
like sprung from the water when he
jumped in it.
Staying alive.
That one is the right.
Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah.
Um, so then they wind up making out a
little in the bar like hallway,
bathroom, like away from everybody, but
it's clear everybody knows what they
did. Like because most of the people in
the bar are shifters, like they can
smell the arousal on them and them all
over each other. Um,
and
yeah, like it is a little like, "Hey,
Cooper, what do you think you're doing
here?" He really thinks he's doing a lot
and he's doing the most irritating
option. Um, but he really believes he's
keeping her safe. Like that's really
what he thinks he's doing, which doesn't
really track, but in his mind, that's
what it is. So, a few days later, like
things are continuing to move. Um, and
Cooper realizes like he needs to tell
her about the shifter thing before his
sister's birthday because they usually
go on a big pack run, like after events
like that.
Um, but um, she comes over, they have
dinner, um, and they wind up banging and
cuz he initially was like, I can't have
sex with her until I tell her the truth
or whatever. Um, I mean, of all of the
moral boundaries he has like imposed on
himself, that one was actually probably
a solid one.
Yeah, that one was probably the one to
keep because then again, there's a big
emphasis on consent and all that good
stuff. But then he's like, um, oh damn,
I don't have a condom or whatever. And
she's like, you don't need one. No
condoms, just trust. Obviously, she
doesn't say that. I added that, but my
tone remained the same. So, I realize
that could have been confusing, but
um I was just like, "So, you're going to
raw dog her?"
But, okay. All right. She's like, "I
have an IUD or whatever." Um, and so
they have an amazing time and then
Cooper confesses that he was a virgin.
Um, and Haley is like, "Um,
you don't have to lie about it." Like,
You found my [ __ ] with surprising ease.
You know, for someone who's a virgin,
she thinks he's like Isa Fisher and
Wedding Crashers. When she's like, "No,
guys just think it's hot when you say
that. I'm definitely not a virgin." I'm
like, "Wait, she's just telling every
guy you're my first
nightmare. Nightmare fuel." Oh my god.
Um and so, um Haley, um asks to stay the
night. She realizes like they're kind of
moving too fast, but she's just kind of
in it now. And she doesn't understand.
She feels this like pulling connection
to him and she's like something is
there's something else happening here,
but like I really don't want to leave
him. Um so Cooper is worried that um
they've gone too fast, blah blah blah.
Um Haley wakes him up with a BJ and he's
less worried about it. Um,
so, um,
that'll solve a lot of worries in life.
It will, won't it? Yeah. The the old
surprise BJ.
So, Cooper is, um, like really actually
into her as a person. Um, but she he's
worried about like how everything is
going to shake out because I just need
them to like talk to each other at this
point.
So, I'm trying to skate over half of
this stuff. So, um,
please don't skate on on my account.
No, that's how I felt when I was reading
it.
Like, there came a point when I was
like, "This book is 100 pages too long."
Like,
oh my god.
You know,
so I was just reading another Kristen
Ashley book that I opened it and I was
like, "This [ __ ] is 678 pages." I made
it 400 pages in and was like, "I'm out."
I know I have 278
pages left.
I'll just last chapter it. I understand
where this book is go. Like, we didn't
have all the information. Oh my gosh,
take 200 pages out and I would still
understand it. Why is this happening?
Yeah. Yeah. Um, but so big plot point is
that Haley figures out the deal she was
working on for Cooper's dad for the
accounting thing is actually bogus. That
the sale was um basically they knew the
building was not up to code and
basically was going to burn down at any
moment, which is why they were trying to
sell it. And Haley caught it. Um,
wait. So Haley caught Cooper's dad
trying to
No, the dad was going to buy
Oh, they were the ones buying it, not
selling it. Okay, sorry.
Yeah. Um, and so as soon as she realizes
it, she drives straight to the pack
house, which she thinks is like the
overnight like bunks for the
construction crews who like sometimes
work long hours. They just let the guys
stay there if they need to. Um,
you know, if that's the narrative she
wanted to fill in, I get how
cuz why would you think it's a wolf
shifter?
Yeah, sure. It's bunkousing for all the
construction workers.
She's like, is this a weird cult? Like
when she goes through the gate and she's
like, I don't have time to deal with
that right now. Um, so she goes to meet
with the dad, he's super impressed. Um,
and he's like, I'm going to have this
out with him at that conference we're
going to go to. um and offers her a job
with the family business. He's like, "I
really think you'd be an incredible
addition to the team." So, the dad knows
that Haley is his mate, is Cooper's
mate.
Um but nobody else in the family knows
except Ethan and Ila.
So, um on the way out, she hears
Cooper's voice and so she like follows
his voice down the hall cuz she knows
his office is there. Um but she stops
because she hears her name. So she like
waits.
So Cooper's younger brother is trying to
fish for information about Haley and
Cooper is trying to like push him off
because his brother's kind of like the
[ __ ] boy of the pack and like not taking
things seriously
and Haley's going to peer it out of
context.
Yeah. So,
Cooper's dad is pushing through the the
pack link, but he's ignoring him. And
the brother makes some shitty comments
about like, you know, Haley, obviously,
she's just a bed warmer. That's why
you're, you know, keeping her around
like this, blah, blah, blah. And Cooper
is like, uh-huh.
Yep. Like trying to get him out of the
office. But that's all Haley hears.
It always goes so well.
Yeah. So, um,
brother also tells him that the mom did
set him up with a date, like an eligible
shifter date for the birthday party.
Um,
the Oh,
yeah. So,
and did Haley accept the job or did she
say she'd think about it?
She said she would think about it. She
wanted to talk to Cooper about it
because it's like, you know, the guy
she's seeing, it's his family business,
like, you know,
respectful.
Yeah. Yeah. Um, so
Haley obviously heard everything. She's
completely heartbroken and she's like,
"Yeah, I remember now why we don't deal
with men anymore."
And um, completely ignores the guys when
she gets home cuz there's a crew at her
house, including his other brother,
Cooper's other brother.
Um, and so they clearly know something
is wrong and that she's upset.
Um, but she just wants to be left alone.
So, she just goes straight to work and
is like, "I'm not dealing with any of
this." Refuses to speak to any of them.
So, the brother is like, "Hey, Coupe,
what the [ __ ] did you do to Haley?"
What did you do?
We like the older brother.
Yeah. Cuz he's like, "If you [ __ ] this
up with your faded mate, I will actually
kill you." Cuz like I know what it's
like to be rejected. It would be better
if you were dead. So, you need to figure
out what the [ __ ] you did and get your
[ __ ] together.
Yes,
it's very serious here. And so,
um, some random dude also shows up at
the house, like seems to be lost or
something. It's kind of weird. And the
brother just like shuts the guy down and
gets him off the property. Um,
I see.
So, Cooper decides um to go to Haley's
office and she's not answering any of
his messages or his calls or anything
and she's like, "Hey, so maybe get out."
M and he's like, "I I don't understand.
Like, why are you why are you being like
this?" And she's like, "What kind of
person stands by and lets someone talk
about a woman that they care about that
way and agrees and doesn't say anything?
I I don't have any interest in
continuing this."
I appreciate her backbone.
Yeah.
Um
I mean, I know he's not going to accept
her backbone.
No.
But I do appreciate it. He does try to
like convince her of stuff and she's
like, "Okay, so if you're not going to
leave, I'm going to leave. Thank you so
much." And he's like chasing her,
begging her. Um, and she starts to put
things different things together. And
she's like, "Oh, okay. So, we've never
been on a date in public, have we? We've
never been to dinner together. We've
never been out together. The only time
you and I have been in public together
is when we were in a group at the bar.
you are go right like you're clearly
either ashamed of me or using me or what
but I'm not interested in it. Um he
never took her to his place which is the
pack house. Um he does have a separate
cabin which comes up later but
but he also never took her there.
He never did. So he's like pleading with
her to like let him explain and she's
like I don't think you need to explain.
I think you should just go ahead and
kiss me right here on the sidewalk in
the middle of town. And he hesitates and
she's like, "There's my answer. That's
all I needed to know. Thank you so
much." And um Haley drives away just
realizing that she had a lot more
feelings with him than she'd really
accepted and is really upset about it.
Um
Cooper gets a smackdown talk from the
sheriff again. Um and
I like Marcus. Yeah, me too. I like him
a lot. Um, and he's like, "Hey, also uh
you need to leave her alone. She is not
a wolf. She does not understand what's
going on.
She does know. She probably has feelings
for you and you essentially just
rejected her and she doesn't understand
why she feels the way that she does. If
you try to go all alpha on her right
now, it is not going to work. You need
to give her some space."
Um, so
which is, you know, insight that I feel
like Cooper probably needed to hear.
100%.
Yeah.
Yeah. Because he was absolutely going to
get drunk and then try to go to her
house and wind up making it worse. Um,
so Marcus,
getting drunk and showing up at
someone's house rarely makes it better.
Um,
yeah. No,
I was like, can I think of a time?
Yeah. I was that I was literally doing
the same. I was like, "Can I think of a
time when it has made it better?"
No.
No. No. I cannot think of a time.
Yeah. Yeah. Go with option B.
Go to sleep.
Yeah. Like lay down.
Don't get in the Uber. Um, hand your
phone to someone you trust.
Like Brida in community.
I don't know why I did that. so
emphatically. Um,
we are really great at a at a full
circle community moment.
Yeah, we really are. So, Marcus then
shows up at Haley's house a few days
later. She's an absolute mess. She's
like not sleeping or eating and she does
not understand why she's like being so
upset about this guy that she slept with
like two times and like has known for
she's like, "You didn't even know him
that well. Why are you so upset about
this? Why are you giving him this much
power over your life?" Yes. She's like,
"Why are you unable to wash your hair
over a man? Come on." Like, for [ __ ]
sake,
you got me out here defending a man for
real.
For real. So, um, Marcus is like, "Hey,
so Cooper [ __ ] up, but I think that
you probably need to talk to him. Like,
I think there's a lot going on." So,
today is Ila's birthday party. So,
you're gonna go shower and get ready,
and I am gonna take you to the birthday
party. Okay.
This is a great friend.
He really is lovely. Um, and
he does.
Yay.
Mhm. He does. So, the party is pretty
nice at first. Um, like Haley's having a
good time. She doesn't see Cooper
anywhere, which is probably why she's
having a nice time. But then his mom
shows up with a woman and is like, "Oh,
have you seen my son? this is so and so.
I wanted to introduce them. I really
think they would get along really well.
And Haley is like, great. Um,
just go [ __ ] myself. Thank you so much.
Yeah, I'm just going to go get a drink.
And so she then runs into Cooper um
inside kind of away from everyone. And
he is begging her to talk. Um, but then
somebody else shows up and Cooper is
immediately like, "Oh, hello. This is
Haley, our family accountant." And she's
like, "Okay, thank you so much. You guys
enjoy your evening."
Yes. And you're really showing me how
into me you are when you are introducing
me as the family accountant.
Yeah. And she's like, "Marcus knows
nothing." So Cooper's continuing to
panic. the guy is actually a very
dangerous alpha. Um, and he was trying
to protect her. So, uh, he tries again
to talk to her, continues to shut him
down. And, um, she just keeps reminding
herself it was just a few dates. And she
decides she's just going to go home.
She's like, I don't. And she's like, you
know, I tried it. I got out of the
house. I did what Marcus asked me to do.
And clearly, like, none of it matters.
So, she gets home and she's just ready
to go to bed and just be done with all
of this when her doorbell rings and she
thinks that it's Cooper because she
looks through the peepphole and there's
a bunch of flowers. Um, but it's not.
It's not. Yeah. No, it's her ex. And so,
she opens the door and sees her ex's
face and somebody hits her from behind.
What?
Yeah. So, there was somebody in the
house as well and she didn't know. So,
we flashed to Cooper. He's drinking and
wallowing and generally being kind of a
[ __ ] His head hurts really bad and
he's not understanding why. Um, but he's
trying to drink fast enough to get
drunk. So, he's just like pounding
whiskey. Um, laced with the snake.
Different book, but also incredible.
So good. Um, and um, so he's not
interested in the pack run. He just
wants to wallow. Ethan comes in and he's
like, "Hey, man. Maybe just go to bed.
You're gonna fix it tomorrow, okay?
Like, we'll fix it tomorrow." So, we're
back to Haley. She wakes up tied to a
chair. Um, her ex is there with two
other guys. Um, and the ex is like, "You
embarrassed me and you have to pay."
Because she like refused to marry him
and reported him for like he physically
attacked her. And so, when she refused
to marry him,
Yes. She was the embarrassing one in
that situation.
Yeah. And so she reported him and
nothing happened because he's an
attorney and has a lot of cop friends.
So like nothing ever happened to him,
but he was highly embarrassed like at
his firm and stuff. And so
good good. You should be embarrassed,
you piece of [ __ ]
Be more embarrassed.
You're not embarrassed enough for my
liking. Like oh the ways I want to shame
you, buddy. Um,
you embarrassed me so much when I beat
the [ __ ] out of you and you to on me.
Yeah.
What?
I can't believe I gave you a concussion
and then you had to go and tell people
about it.
It was just a little concussion. No need
to get out of sorts.
It was mild. Like, you could still read.
I've had a lot of concussions.
You could still look at blue light.
What's the problem?
You're literally fine.
So, um, Haley is like, "Oh, he's here to
murder me." Like, this is fully
unhinged. Like, she's finally starting
to like fully come to her senses and
realizes like the men with her are, um,
people he has hired specifically to kill
her. And so, um, she's like, "Yeah, and
nobody's going to be looking for me
because I stomped off after having a
fight with Cooper. So even if somebody
texts me or tries to call, like they're
not going to think anything of it if I
ignore it. So she's like looks like
we're saving ourselves, kiddos. And so
she like finds her moment, breaks out of
the chair, kicks the [ __ ] out of her ex.
Um winds up stabbing a guy with a
screwdriver cuz this is an active
construction site. And so she
Oh, they just tied her up at her house.
Yeah. They kept her
They didn't take her to a secondary
location.
No. Okay. So she's like, "This is my
dining room. What is happening?" Like,
so she stabs a guy with a screwdriver
and then she winds up jumping out a
second story window still with her hands
bound. She did all of this with her
hands bound and then she takes off
barefoot through the woods. She knows
generally the direction of Cooper's
cabin and so she's just like oriented
that direction and runs that way.
Um, Cooper is continuing to drink and be
a [ __ ] when his sister comes in with
Marcus on the phone and Marcus is like,
"Hey, somebody heard a gunshot at
Haley's house. I need you to go get
there like right now." Um, he is at
stuck at an accident scene, like a
multiple car pileup, and he he literally
is unable to get to the house.
Okay.
And so
I was wondering, I was like, why did why
didn't you just go yourself? could do
it, Marcus.
So, at that point, Ila finally tells
Cooper about Haley's ex cuz he has had
no idea this whole time still. So,
Cooper flips out, mind links with his
big brother who had just dropped Haley
off. And um the brother turns around and
goes to check on her house. He was like,
"She was fine. Like, I watched her go
into the house. I heard the door lock.
She's fine, but I will turn around and
go check. So, he gets to the house, find
the guy that she stabbed. He is now dead
on her floor, and he's like, "So, things
aren't fine.
Uh, things things might have escalated
since I dropped her off."
Yeah. Um, and so Cooper
shifts and takes off running through the
woods. He's like, "I'm gonna find her."
She's still He doesn't even know he's a
shifter. She has no idea. So, Cooper
finally finds her and her ex is like
standing over her with a gun. He takes
the ex down fully um and breaks his arm
and his leg, but when he turns around to
check on Haley, she has picked up the
gun and is aiming it at him because
she's like, "What?" Um
there's a giant woof that I need to
protect myself from.
Right. And then Cooper shifts and she's
like, "Cool, good, great." Like, "What
the fuck?" She throws herself at him and
she's like, "Get me out of here." Like,
"I I whatever. I'm probably
hallucinating. I probably have a
concussion. Just get me the [ __ ] out of
here. I don't even care."
Um,
so Leila, the sister who's a doctor,
checks on her, says she's okay. But
Haley is not speaking,
but she's also not letting go of him and
he's starting to get really freaked out
like cuz she's just not moving. And so
um she has a pretty bad cut on her head
um and a broken hand and some other
things. So they get her taken care of.
Um and um Ila's like, "Hey, so I heard
you know about the whole shifter thing.
You okay? Have any questions?" Cuz Ila
like took her aside and was like, "Are
you hurt anywhere? I can't see. Is there
anything?" You know, whatever.
Mhm.
And so she's like, "So and Haley's like,
"Yeah, um to be fair, a lot has happened
tonight and uh I don't think I have
fully processed that. I'm not scared of
you guys, but like um
but also like my ex did just show up
with two hired hitmen and tried to kill
me. It's a lot to process.
I may have killed a man with a
screwdriver. So maybe uh
with her hands behind her back is
honestly impressive.
Yeah. Yeah. And they might have been I
don't remember where her hands were.
Regardless, her hands were tied together
and she killed a man with a screwdriver,
which is just it was
we give her credit regardless of where
her hands were.
It's very good work. Um, Cooper decides
to take her to his cabin
um because she can't stay in the house,
obviously. It's an active crime scene.
So, um, Cooper is very gentle, very
kind, taking care of her um all through
the night. The next day, Marcus shows up
with Ila. Marcus is getting her
statement
um and um Ila is checking on her
injuries and stuff, making sure she's
okay. And she's just like, "Oh, I miss
my family so bad." She's like,
"This community is so lovely, but like I
miss my people and like she's grateful,
but she's also really sad." But now
she's like, "I guess I can call my
sister." Like that's good news. Like, so
I guess they caught
Bad news. I killed a man.
Good news.
Would you like to come out for a visit?
Book a flight.
Got a guest room. We'll have several at
my bed and breakfast.
So, um, Cooper feels like everything is
his fault and, you know, he's freaking
out and they wind up having a big heart
to heart and they have like their
solidifying [ __ ] of like, you're mine
and, you know, this is it for me and
blah blah blah, but he still doesn't
bond her.
He's like, I can't do that yet. She's
just been through a trauma. And it's
like, okay, buddy. Yeah,
Haley is getting so agitated because
he's still not acknowledging her in
public and she's like, I hate it here.
Like, everybody has explained about
faded mates, so she understands more
now, but she still is like, this is
[ __ ]
When you understand it, it makes it even
less logical as to why he's taking his
time.
Yes. Yeah. And so she's like, "Okay, so
basically you think that because I'm
human, I'm too weak to handle this and
that's why you won't claim me. That's
what you're telling me." Right? I got
myself out. Like to be clear, you didn't
save me. Like I saved myself and still,
right? So she's getting more and more
angry.
Um
and she's like, "I'm just going to go
see my family because I can do that now.
So bye.
going home.
I have other options now.
Yeah, going home. So, um, Ethan follows
her. Cooper is like, "You have 3 days
and then I'm coming for you." And she's
like, "Okay." Like, whatever.
Shut the [ __ ] up, Coop. Like,
yeah. Yeah.
I I'm like rooting for them and he's so
annoying.
He's really annoying. So, like the she's
there for one night at her parents house
and she comes downstairs and Ethan is in
the kitchen like eating breakfast and
she's like, "What?" And her mom's like,
"I found this young man on the porch."
Oh my god.
Oh my god. And so, um, there's very cute
like bonding with the family with Ethan.
They're like, "Oh, is this your
boyfriend?" And he's like, "No, please
don't say that.
Don't even joke about that. Please
don't. Um, so
she's like, "I like having my dick still
attached to my body, and if you make
that joke again, it won't be anymore."
Yep. Yep. Um, so her sister, her younger
sister, gives her a pretty firm come to
Jesus, and she's like, "Okay, so I get
it. I do get it. And he really thinks
he's caring for you. If you want to show
him that you're strong enough to handle
it, then you need to show him you're
strong enough to handle it. So go to
this work conference, which we have now
found out is a wolf thing.
Go to the work conference, be as fully
sexy as possible. Kill in every meeting,
and
if he wants to show up, he can show up.
Yeah. Keep living your life and being a
badass. Don't let him take that from
you.
And he'll either get it or he won't. And
it's actually very funny the dynamic
between Ethan and the sister because
initially he's like, "Yeah, listen to
her. I like her a lot. Give give Koopa a
break. He's really trying." You know,
and then when it's like, "Wear sexy
clothes for the conference."
No, I I like her less now. He's like,
"No, no, no,
no. Maybe wear a turtleneck under a long
sleeve cardigan to the conference."
Yeah. So Haley shows up at the pack
house because after her 3 days are up or
whatever because um she can't be at
Cooper's house right at his cabin
because of the the rumors that that
would start. She can't be in the bed and
breakfast because she can't be in the
bed and breakfast really. Like she's
pretty sure she's going to have to move.
She's like I don't think I can live
here.
Um,
that would be hard to overcome
being attacked in your own home.
Mhm.
Yeah.
And Leila is staying elsewhere for a few
days. So, she's staying in Ila's
apartment at the pack house. What's the
problem? Um,
and um she just continues to hold her
boundaries. So, at the conference, there
is a big confrontation about the deal
that Haley figured out
um and realized was a scam. And um
Cooper really wants to like interfere
because one of the guys is getting
pretty aggressive, but he's like, "But I
really can't." And
Haley doesn't need him to interfere
anyway. And he's like, "Oh."
Everybody is now coming to him and
they're like, "So tell me about this
human accountant. Like she's beautiful.
She's smart. She kept her cool in a room
full of alphas posturing at her. Like
tell us more about her." like we really
like her and he's like, "Oh, no."
Because he's an idiot.
So, yeah. Well, I mean, like he's had a
very low view of her,
right?
While also being like, "No, she's like
I'm cherishing her." I'm like, "No, the
best thing that's ever happened to me."
You're really that way. Act that way.
So, that's basically what she tells him.
She's like, "I don't think you
understand. You continue to follow me
around, but you push me away in public.
Everybody is just gonna think that we're
[ __ ] buddies or something. And frankly,
that's all we are right now. And you're
not protecting me. You are damaging my
reputation. Yeah.
Why are we doing this? Either claim me
or leave me alone. Like, period.
So, Haley then runs into the head alpha
of the region who invites her for a
drink. And he seems to be kind of into
her. Um, but it he says he thought she
was his faded mate. Like when he saw her
and like first smelled her, he really
thought so. But the more he's talking to
her, he's realizing that she's not and
he's really sad about it. But he really
likes her.
And so um she just hangs out with him
basically for the duration of the party.
The regional alpha.
Yeah. So he is the regional manager
and
Cooper is the assistant to the regional
manager.
Not okay. To the
Yeah. There are multiple assistants to
the regional manager.
Yeah.
Not assistant manager.
No. So
never
assistant to the regional alpha.
He has not like earned to drop that too
at this point. So um
are there executive alphas in this
hierarchy?
Not that I'm aware of.
Seuite.
I'm pretty sure there is a council
though. It's a complex corporate
structure. Um so um
Cooper keeps telling Haley how much he
misses her and she's just getting more
mad. She's like this was your idea. and
he he's like getting more jealous that
she's like dancing with Blake or
whatever. Um but he sticks to his plan.
He's not going to mark her, whatever.
And my notes literally say this back and
forth [ __ ] continues. It just
there's more like description of scenes
like this over and over.
Oh my gosh.
So, I didn't outline them. I don't know.
But
but
quite frankly, and I mean this with no
disrespect to your outline, when the ex
showed up.
Yes. I thought we were done.
Yeah. I And so then when you're like And
then
Yeah.
She goes to the conference. I was like,
"Wait, what?"
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, okay. Yeah. The conference I
completely forgot about after the ex
showed up,
right? Because that's like the in any
other romance novel, like that is
the the big crescendo.
Yeah. Yeah. That that's the story. Um
but it continues. There's another party
several days later. Um
Yeah. Those conferences aren't just one
day big corporate wolf conference like
that.
So Haley is once again dancing with the
head alpha at a party. Um literally
everyone is telling Cooper that he is a
[ __ ] [ __ ] cuz she's like looking
beautiful out here on the dance floor
laughing with this amazing alpha
whatever like who is incredibly powerful
and he's over here with his thumb in his
ass like a [ __ ] idiot. And basically
he gets told that repeatedly and finally
he loses his [ __ ] and claims her in
front of everyone like yanks her away
from the alpha and is like she's mine
and Blake's like I know you dumb [ __ ]
like like I literally have been dancing
with her and like lightly flirting with
her for days trying to get you to do
this.
Yeah. Really thought like this would be
the catalyst like
Yeah. Yeah. Like I thought you were
going to say, "May I cut in 5 days ago,
you bitch?"
Right. Right. And I've also been
stopping all the other people from
hitting on her.
Yes. He's like, "I don't even like to
dance. Like I don't even like to dance."
That's not in the book, but I wish it
were. Do you see these twinkle toes? I
have blisters.
So, um, they have a solidifying [ __ ]
It's incredible.
On the dance floor.
No, they do make it back to their room.
Um, and so then everyone is incredibly
happy. Cooper's mom is already talking
about like where them grandb babies at.
Like everybody's just so excited.
She really pivoted quickly from I'm
introducing him to a suitable option,
right? But again, faded mate trumps all
in this universe.
So it's the epilogue.
So it is Haley's um bachelorette hen
party.
Okay. where weeks weeks later her twin
sister is like, "Hey honey, so you have
had a traumatic year. Are you sure that
you need to be getting married to this
man right now?" Cuz also her sisters are
like, "I think this is a cult. Like
these people are [ __ ] weird." Cuz
none of her family knows about the
shifter thing. So they're like, "These
people are [ __ ] bizarre." Like what
is this?
They're not wrong. No. And so, but Haley
is like, "Hey, I love you and I
appreciate you so much. Please don't
worry about it. I'm super happy. We're
getting married. It's going to be
incredible." And that's the end.
So, I think part of the thing with this
book, and I think why it was too long,
because that wasn't necessarily my
experience with the other books in the
series,
is because she was setting up all of the
other characters for their future books
as well,
right? Because the head alpha gets a
book, Marcus gets a book, like all of
these side characters, and even the the
business deal that falls through and all
that stuff. That's like an arching plot
through several of the books. And so
that's where it's like, yeah, so Haley's
plot is the ex showing up, but like the
series plot is the conference and all
this other stuff.
So, I really liked the perspective and
how it was a little bit different in
some ways and like, you know, I
appreciated the story in general, but I
think she had to like draw out the back
and forth to introduce all these side
characters cuz there were even other
ones I didn't even mention.
Oh gosh.
Um, and so I think that that's kind of
why that happened that way. I would say
it's definitely worth the read.
and the story or the the series is worth
the read. Um, but yeah, I I became less
and less into Cooper the longer it went.
I feel like when this started off I was
like, "This is strong. This is real
strong." And then like by the end I was
like, "Cooper,
what are you doing?"
Mhm.
He is, I will say, like redeemed in the
later books because he's still around
and so like you get to see
he still is the pack alpha.
Yes. And you get to see their dynamic
mature a little bit like
you know in a collateral way. Um but
yeah, overall a very enjoyable book and
a great series.
Yeah, it was very endearing.
He got annoying, but it was still very
fun.
Yeah,
I did. It did probably go longer than I
because I really thought it was gonna I
thought that was the the end.
I remember when I was reading it, I was
like, "Oh my god." Like, "Oh my, okay,
we're killing people. Like, we're
attacking people." Oh, oh my god, I have
like 200 pages left.
And then you look down, you're like, I'm
only 63% of the way through the book.
What the [ __ ]
I was like, uh,
where are we going from here?
Yes.
Cuz like the X never comes up again.
It's like Haley has nightmares and so
she's not going to move back into the
B&B.
She gives it to one of her sisters. So
Oh, yeah.
That makes sense.
Mhm.
Cuz they will also move across the
country now that they
they will
No, she's there.
Yep.
What's our rating system?
Um,
well, I was going to say screwdrivers,
but that's a little dark.
Oh,
I was like, what's a thing from this
book? a screw.
Whoops. A spreadsheet.
Um,
we could do uh regional managers laws.
We could Yeah. I I really don't feel
like there's just like an immediate
obvious
She was at the hardware store a lot,
right?
CPR compression like CPR dummies.
Yeah, this book is not lending itself
naturally to a rating system.
Mm-m.
This is the most we've struggled in a
long time.
What if we just go out of stars?
Full moons. Would that make you feel
better for the shifters?
Yes.
Okay. For the shifters, full moons,
which has no impact in this book. They
shift when they want.
But we're going full moons. Um we'll say
out of um
10.
Uh we will go
I'm going to say seven.
Yeah.
You know.
Mhm.
He was too annoying for an eight.
Mhm.
But it was until he got annoying, it
would have been an eight.
Yes. Yeah.
And I would say the setup for the
series, like the context of the rest of
the series helps a little bit as well.
And so, yeah, I would go seven.
Seven full moons.
Yeah.
Any waning.
No.
Any waxing crescent?
I almost was like, uh, it's going to be
a six with a waxing gibbus.
I don't know why I did that voice. I
don't know that I've ever done that
voice in my life.
I'm glad you felt safe enough to try a
new voice.
Okay, seven full moons. No waxing or
waiting. Gibbus goodbye
moons
cresence.
Not the Pillsberry.
Oh, I could go for that right now.
I could [ __ ] that up. Oh,
okay. Let us know how many full moons
and crescent rolls you would rate this
one. Uh, don't forget to like,
subscribe, DM us any recommendations
that you'd like us to review in the
future, and we'll see you next time.
Bye, smudsluts. Bye.
Well, that's it for this week, Smud
[ __ ] We hope it was good for you, cuz
it sure was great for us. If you're
digging what we're doing, it would mean
a lot if you'd take a minute to rate and
review the show wherever you're
listening right now. Maybe tell that
sexy someone to lend us an ear. We love
you. We appreciate you. And we'll see
you next week. Stay smiley.