[rock music] Morning. Welcome to the Victor Will Program. Or I guess it could be good evening or whatever. You can listen to this show on demand everywhere podcasts can be found,
Spotify, YouTube, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, it's easy to find. You should check it out. I actually need to get, uh, a couple, uh, previous episodes uploaded. Been slack in the last couple days 'cause I've been in a Christmas nightmare. Not really. Just trying to make the, uh, Christmas programming on Classy 97 as we get closer to the holiday as dialed in and perfect as it can be. Josh and I from Classy, the kings of Christmas music in East Idaho. Uh, yeah, it's g- it's gonna be
real, real good for the, you know, week and a half leading up to Christmas starting Monday. So, if you're looking for holiday cheer, that's where you wanna go. Anywhere else sucks. All right? Telling you, Josh and I work very hard on this. Okay? And it's, it's never good enough. Gotta keep dialing it in and dialing it in, and researching and blah, blah, blah. You know, same as I do with K-Bear's playlist, so... That's what I'm, uh, up to with some multitasking this morning as I get rolling on the show. Aside from that, of course, trying to find content. First thing I saw was a thread that I knew would annoy me, 'cause I knew the top answer was gonna be something I complain about every day a- at about this time. The question was, "What is lame when you're young but what's cool when you're older?" And you know it's gonna be sleep. Yeah. Sleeping's great. You know, you, you kids, I'm telling you, if you're able to sleep till noon, take advantage of it. 'Cause the day might come when you're like, "Well, I have this opportunity to be a morning show host," and you will therefore need to wake up at 5:00 AM. Ugh. It's brutal. It's brutal. Other things that people think are lame when you're young but cool when you're older, getting socks for Christmas. Yeah. Socks are, uh, you know, nice to have. [laughs] And sometimes they're expensive. Yeah, everything's expensive nowadays, but... Oh, there's more sleeping, naps. I just, I have the worst time bringing myself to take a nap 'cause I tend to wake up
many, many hours later. I, I, I don't do a nice little half hour power nap. No, I wake up when it's time for me to go, like, back to bed. Then go, "Okay, I wasted my whole afternoon." I usually feel pretty good afterward, but still... Birds. What? Do kids think birds are lame? Now, birds kinda give me the creeps, but I don't know if I'd, uh, say when I was a kid I thought they were lame. You know, they're... they're fine. Let's see here. Staying in on the weekend. Eh. That's 'cause you get so tired. You're like, "I've had it." Especially, like, you know, once you roll through November and December, there's so much activity going on that, like, you just don't wanna do anything.
Just wanna kick back and watch TV, sit on that couch. Hopefully get to do a little bit of that this weekend. I d- well, I got my daughter around, so probably not. Probably be keeping fairly busy. Plus, I got something fun going on tomorrow. It's a secret. Let's see here. [laughs] I've, I've had it with these people and their, "Oh, going to bed." Yeah, yeah, we get it. Somebody already said that. Don't remind me.
Uh, let's see. What's lame when you're young but cool when you're older? Not following trends. I don't know. I, I, I would think it's, uh, lame to follow trends when you're young and when you're older, right? Maybe that was just me. But I probably followed trends. I probably looked back and... I mean, if you look at my favorite bands, for example, I'm pretty basic. All right? They're pretty popular. What? Tool? The Beatles? Pink Floyd? [laughs] Yeah. Oh, wow, how unique. How unique of me. [laughs] Another person talking about not leaving the house. Yeah, you know, s- hanging out at home, it can be real nice, especially if you can take a nap. [laughs] Okay. The, the thread's done now 'cause we have yet another person going to bed early. Going to bed early, eh. Not having plans for the weekends. People need to learn how to see if somebody else has already made a particular response. All right. Time to keep digging. Time to get the old content shovel out, dig deep. [rock music] Just cooked my brain reading about how much money Howard Stern makes. I take it he must have re-signed with SiriusXM. About $120 million a year. $120 million a year.
Yeah, they break it down by how many hours he works in a year, and it comes out to being about $400,000 an hour. Pretty good wage, huh? And, you know, you'll hear people, like, e- even Peaches say, "God, nobody's listening to his show anymore." But they break down the math based on, you know, how many people subscribe to SiriusXM.
[rock music] And, you know, they're ... That's where they make most of their money. You pay
to get SiriusXM. So if you can keep basically, what'd they say here, 2% of people who subscribe to SiriusXM listening to him, that would cover his wages. So if he's got like 3 to 5% of people listening, SiriusXM's making pretty good money off of his show.
What do I need to do to get 5% of people listening to me, [laughs] on SiriusXM? I, I know my market share here in East Idaho, it's much better than that. Ugh. Sorry, again, just kinda cooked my brain. Just trying to imagine
... I'm trying to imagine making $400,000, not in a year, but in a year. [laughs] That would be amazing. That'd be just ... Uh, I mean, can you imagine? There might be a handful of you listening who do make that kinda dough. I know we've got a handful of people in the area who make that kinda dough, but my goodness. Well, good, good for him. I just don't know why he doesn't retire. I mean, maybe you just can't turn down 120 million a year, no matter how old you are. What is it? You're 77 or something? He's old. He's way up there. And he doesn't even, like, work a lot. And I think he does his show from home, just kicking back in his, uh, you know, Florida compound. Be great. I really need to start working on my, um, home studio game. Tell you what. Place is a mess right now. You can't even walk through it. Ugh. Well, New Year's is coming up. New Year's resolution, get my act together. Jeez. New Year's gonna be here in just a few weeks, so clean up the studio, start doing more stuff from home. More good content. Put more effort into the content I make here. Think I just need to go to bed earlier. You know? It's a motivation problem. [laughs] Okay. Enough, uh, beating myself up about not making Howard Stern money. I mean, I should be grateful I get to do this for a job. All right? It's a, it's a pretty fun job for the most part. It's that after the show, staring at my computer, making my eyes bleed from staring at spreadsheets and data that, uh, you know, cooks my mind. You don't understand that part of it. This part, I just get to look things up and yap. [rock music] I didn't drink any coffee this morning, so I quickly whipped together an energy drink. My daughter bought me this stuff called Raw Meat! Um, I don't know if you've ever watched the YouTuber, Papa Meat. He also has a YouTube channel called Meat Canyon where he makes these wild cartoons, and you know, he's sponsored by one of these powdered energy drink companies. There are a variety of 'em, but his personal brand is called Raw Meat, which if you're a long time listener, I'm sure you've heard me talk about Raw Meat, Brutal Beef, and Liquid Cheese. Uh,
it doesn't seem to be working. I thought I made it pretty potent, but maybe I'm just tired. Anyhoo, I was just reading that, uh, the government's working really hard, you know, getting some stuff done that's gonna help out all of us. Uh, they've decided that they are going to ban the font, Calibri,
[laughs] from, I guess, government documents and move back to Times New Roman for official documents. Now, this is what they're sitting around figuring out what to do on the taxpayer dime. Let's change the fonts on our documents. I mean, I think the reason they switched it years ago is just 'cause one's easier to read than the other. Like, could you guys get down to business and do something that is actually gonna help us? Like, you know how I'm tired today? How about ending the stupid time change? Why don't they, why don't they do something that everybody agrees on? It seems like they just want us to keep fighting with one another, doesn't it? I mean, 'cause I saw people discussing this and people are fighting about this online, uh, simply because people choose sides. Like, this is the dumbest thing for people to be arguing about. I mean, it's a complete waste of time.
I, I just don't understand. There's so many things that everyone could agree on that they could do, and they just, they just won't do it. Ah! Anyway. [laughs] I don't know what font I'm reading this, uh, this document in, or wait, or online here is in, but you know, it looks pretty nice. [laughs] Talking fonts on the morning show. I need to drink more Raw Meat! That's what I need to do. I'm gonna chug the rest of this Raw Meat
and then I'll be back with more and, uh, I won't talk about fonts anymore on the show because
th- that is just a stupid topic. But it's all over the news. [laughs] That's where we're at in 2025. The government discussing fonts. Ugh. Can we get back to just a, a normal boring government? [rock music] Well, I was just watching a video of an octopus playing the piano, and th- the headline to me was a little misleading. It was, you know, this guy taught a super intelligent octopus how to play piano. You, you wanna hear it? I mean, it was all right, but
... No, just listen.
[plays guitar]
[instrumental music plays] He's on time.
More. [instrumental music plays] Hm.
[laughs] Oh, sour note. You suck. [laughs] No good. Two thumbs down. [laughs] I don't know how you make an underwater piano, so props to the guy who made that for his pet octopus. Have you ever watched videos of, like, cuttlefish or octopus changing their shape? It's one of the craziest things you'll ever see. Like, shape-shifting to, you know, blend in with their environment. It's crazy. Changing their color and things like that in the blink of an eye. We got some weird creatures on this planet, and I think that octopus and cuttlefish have gotta be, like, the weirdest. They're just crazy! And they are really, really smart. But I don't know. I'm, I'm still, after that sour note, not too impressed with the piano playing that I heard there. Um, I, I wanna hear some real piano shredding, okay? [laughs] But the timing was pretty good. The timing was pretty good. The guy's sitting by the tank, playing his acoustic guitar, and boy he is happy too. I'm sure it's fun to jam with your pets. I need to teach my cat how to play piano. I, I'm gonna work on that.
What's up, everybody? I'm sitting here in a Christmas nightmare. It, it, it's not that bad. It's just tedious. And looking at some of these songs got me wondering, what are some of the lists floating around
relating to annoying Christmas songs? So I Googled it, and there are of course a number of articles floating around about the most annoying Christmas songs ever made, and not a lot of consensus here between these articles. All right? Like, one of the lists, for example, has the most popular Christmas song, which, whether you like it or not, it is the most popular Christmas song, All I Want For Christmas Is You, at the top of the list. Now, songs that are overplayed do tend to be annoying. However, I see the numbers. I know what you people are streaming locally during the Christmas season. I know what songs you're going out and searching that you just gotta hear, and you know what's number one nationwide and in East Idaho? That's right, All I Want For Christmas Is You. Hold on. Let me, let me double-check that since I've got my spreadsheet up. Since I've got my spreadsheet. Uh, yes, yes, as a matter of fact, uh, that, that is correct. No wait, wait. Last year during the week of Christmas, Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree would have been, right here in East Idaho, the most popular. But, I mean, uh, numbers-wise, number of streams, it was pretty close. This person better be on-topic about annoying Christmas songs. K-Bear, you're live on the show. Keep that in mind. Who's this?
Hey, it's Brian.
Brian, what you got for the most annoying Christmas song?
No, no, no. I'm going the other direction. I'm going the other direction.
But, B- B- Brian, that's, that-
Can we agree-
That's the topic at hand, but what are- what do you- what are you gonna say?
I know. Can we agree that Trans-Siberian Orchestra's Christmas Eve Sarajevo is perfection?
Oh, absolutely, especially after seeing it live. Did you go to that show at the, uh, arena?
So I didn't make it to this one, but about 10 years ago I got free tickets, and I just showed up with my wife, and I was like, "Yeah, we'll see what happens." And we were gonna buy some tickets at the window, and they were like, "Here, we got these two free ones. Would, would you like free things?" And we were, like, in the lower bowl right next to the stage. It was beautiful.
Oh-
It is, it is perfection.
I absolutely agree, and, I mean, that show was definitely one of the best concerts I've ever seen. And I, I knew it would be, like-
Exactly!
I knew it would be good, but I didn't know it would be anywhere near that good. It was crazy.
My flappers were gasted. I, I worked security at a few event centers, uh, in, like... One in Orlando and then here in Idaho. Uh, do you remember the Elray Event Center-
Oh, yeah
... down in Blackfoot?
Yeah.
Yeah, I worked security there for, like, five years, when they were still doing, like, concerts and stuff. Um, I've seen a lot of shows. I got paid to see a lot of shows. I was... My jaw was dropped by how incredible Trans-Siberian Orchestra was as, as a whole show.
Oh, yeah.
The music, the fire, the flames, everything. It was... Oh, my gosh. And then there's people that are like, "Oh, my goodness. All I Want For Christmas Is A New French Jeep." And I'm like, "You need to go get cultured-"
[laughs]
... is what you need to do.
Absolutely, man. I mean, uh, I'll, I'll never stop raving about that show. I hope they come back next year, 'cause anybody who didn't go, like-
Nope
... I mean, I'll put that show up there with Tool, with Nine Inch Nails, I mean, with the, the best shows I've ever seen. It was crazy.
I'm sure. I know. I think I've seen you at a Taylor Swift concert, so-
[laughs]
... it's likely what's happening.
Hey, that's my top show of all time. How-
[laughs]
... how d- how dare you spread, uh, spread my secrets around like that. [laughs]
Anyway, sorry. I just... I was baffled that Trans-Siberian Orchestra took the time to come to us plebeians here in, uh, Idaho Falls, and it's, it's an amazing show. And I feel like a lot of people-... that that is top tier Christmas music and-
Oh, I mean, even if you hate Christmas music, you would love that show. Like-
Yeah.
I mean, it was like straight metal at times. And I mean, uh-
Yeah
... the, the musicianship was crazy, and I, I don't, I don't really know if I've ever seen a stage show that crazy. It was crazier than, than Tool, so...
That's awesome. Anyway, that's all I got. I just wanted to rant and rave about how cool it is, but-
Well, right on, man.
I think more people need to get their, their kids to those kinds of shows, 'cause I think those kinds of shows are the things that create a little musical prodigy or, like, the true love for music, you know?
Oh, yeah. That, that show was my girlfriend's daughter's first concert, and she was-
Oh! [laughs]
She's gonna be really let down-
That's amazing!
She's gonna be really let down at the next concert she goes to. [laughs]
There isn't even fire at the next concert.
[laughs] Exactly. [laughs]
Anyway. Yeah, that's all I got, man. Have a good one.
Uh, hey, you too, man. Peace.
Hail Hydra.
All right. Well, that ended up just being a break about how awesome Trans-Siberian Orchestra is, which is, is very true. Uh, they do not show up on any of these lists of annoying Christmas songs. Yeah. You, you, you got a number like, you know, the Paul McCartney Wonderful Christmastime, that song is kind of annoying, for sure. The Chipmunk song, I don't know, I kinda like that just from when I was a kid. The worst Christmas song, without question, Christmas Shoes. It's garbage. Uh, got another caller? All right, all right, we'll keep you happening for a second. All right, uh, you're live on the show, keep that in mind. We gotta go to break pretty quick though, so make it snappy.
So, the worst Christmas song I think is Santa Baby.
Santa Baby is weird, that's for sure.
Um, they, they, they play it way too much and it's in different versions. I don't know what's worse than Mar- Mariah Carey anyways.
[laughs]
So...
You know, and s- crazy enough, Santa Baby is very, very popular. [laughs] I don't know wh- ... To me, it's w- a weird song, but, uh, I, I, I think there are worse than that, like, again, the Christmas Shoes. It just doesn't get worse than that. That, that song is terrible.
Yeah, and my mom ... That was my mom's favorite, like, song.
Which one? Santa Baby or the Christmas Shoes?
The Christmas Shoes.
Oh, man. Your mom's just getting, you know, dark for the holidays, huh? [laughs]
Apparently. [laughs]
I wanna hear the blea- bleakest Christmas song ever. [laughs]
I know.
And it sounds like-
It's sad and depressing.
Yeah, and it, it-
But-
... sounds like a weird, like, really bad Nickelback song or something too. It's a, i- i- it's-
Yeah. Like, yeah, like, the, the photo one.
Ugh. Uh, i- i- it ... Well, because give me Photograph over Christmas Shoes any day. [laughs]
Exactly right. So that, that's my worst Christmas song is Santa Baby because, like I said, they have a bunch of different versions of it,
and I don't know which one's worse yet. [laughs]
Yeah. The- There- That's the deal with Christmas songs is generally you, you have, uh, a handful of songs in a million different versions. So it's, you know, when we're going through the music trying to figure out which Christmas songs to play, which is what I'm, you know, kinda working on right now, the little spicing it up, uh, there are some really bad versions of some Christmas songs out there. [laughs]
Exactly right. So play the Grinch one. I love Grinch.
Uh, yeah. We ... I might have a rock version of that we could throw on. Give me a few.
Okay.
All right.
Sounds great. Thank you.
Yep. Have a good one.
You too.
Yeah. There's, there's a decent version- ver- version. I can't even talk. God, what an idiot! Um, there's a pretty decent version of the Grinch, uh, that I think we have in the system, so I might get that going in a minute. Plus, I gotta find some freak news, like stat. [instrumental music plays] All right. Let's dig into a little bit of freak news. [instrumental music plays] You know, if you don't like Christmas decorations, just mosey along, okay? I know we got a few Grinches out there, "I don't like Christmas."
You don't need to start blasting off rounds at the, uh, inflatables in your neighborhood. Seems kinda dangerous. Yeah, I guess, uh, in New Hampshire, somebody was just m- mowing through neighborhoods [laughs] j- just unloading
... just blasting gunshots at, uh, an inflatable, uh, snowman, gingerbread man, and maybe even more. Now, police believe that they were shot at from the road, which would make sense. Um, I [laughs] would assume somebody's not just wa- uh, walking around. But people are crazy, so you never know. They wanted to let people know, this act of vandalism is not only destructive to private property ... Uh, um, yep, no kidding. It ... You could kill somebody! All right? You don't need to be unloading a firearm [laughs] in the neighborhood. Uh. Some people really hate Christmas.
Uh, if you didn't hear, if you want to, uh, waste a couple bucks,
Powerball jackpot hit a billion after no winner last night, so ... And I'll, I'll probably go waste $2. You know, just throw it in the garbage, 'cause I never win on any lotto tickets. Just chuck it in... You know, you, you could light your money on fire or you could, you know, have the, the, the fun time dreaming of what it would be like to win a billion dollars. If I magically don't show up at work, uh, after whenever the next drawing is-... you can guess what happened, 'cause I'm sleeping in. All right? [laughs] Much as I enjoy this program, I, I think I'd be one of those guys that would find some new hobbies. Yeah. Let's see here. Don't use a potato to, uh, keep ice from forming on your windshield. You might have seen this floating around on TikTok, a viral winter car care hack. Uh, it doesn't work, okay? You just smear potato juice all over your windshield. It gets dirty, and then the ice forms on top of it anyway. And yeah, it's just a waste of time and a waste of a perfectly good potato that you could make into a delicious baked potato or slice up and fry. Uh, they're, uh, pretty much anything you can do with a potato is more useful than this. Okay? [laughs] Just throwing it out there. Some of the hacks you find online, dumb! But people will believe pretty much anything that they see online, so yeah.
Surprised the phone ain't blowing up, "Whatever, dude, I've used a potato to clear my windshield all the time. It's the Idaho way. You don't know what you're talking about, man." Oh, they found another foot on a beach in, uh, Washington. I think I watched an Unsolved Mysteries episode about feet washing up on the shores of, uh, Western Washington. It's a thing out there. People have just been- Yeah, th- do they have the, uh, you know... I guess, uh, he, he was, I was gonna say he's real into feet, but a serial killer that hates feet, you know? [laughs] I don't know. Just... And, and, and they're always in a shoe, too. And it's just a shoe with a foot in it that washes up on the beach. Um, no additional suspicious items were found in the area. Nothing else, just a foot. But yeah, was it a YouTube video or a Unsolved Mysteries I watched about the Washington feet mysteries? I don't know. Just be, be careful out there. Somebody out there hacking off feet and... Or, I, I mean, there are a lot of different, uh, sea creatures. Perhaps they don't like feet. I, I don't know. [laughs] But the lack of other remains makes it j- just kinda weird. So earlier on the show we were talking about the worst Christmas songs or most annoying Christmas songs of all time. Stuart called me and told me I need to check out Jingle Cats. You know, being the crazy cat guy, he said, "You know, it might, might be funny at first, but after a few minutes, you know, it's like just make it stop! Make it stop!" So I don't know if I've heard this before, but I did, I did find Jingle Cats Christmas Full 1993 CD. Figured we'd check this out here. All right. And I haven't listened to this. I would assume the cats don't use bad language in their Christmas songs.
Meow. Meow, meow.
[laughs] Oh.
Meow.
[laughs]
Meow, meow. Meow. Meow.
[laughs] I'll bet this is driving anybody who has a cat... Well, uh, not the people necessarily. Well, maybe you too. But I bet if you have a cat in the area, this is driving them crazy.
Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.
[laughs] It's actual meows. [laughs]
Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.
I could listen to this all day. I don't know what you're talking about, Stewart.
Meow.
Listen to the little kitties.
Meow.
You know? They're singing.
Meow. Meow. Meow.
[laughs]
Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.
You know, last night I was telling my kids, they were watching YouTube and they pulled up the, uh, cat brain rot video. And I'm like, "Don't, don't be showing that to my cats. Don't you be showing them cat brain rot. What about this?" You, you put the little, uh, spinning cat brain rot image on along with this music instead of the, the techno music.
Meow. Meow.
[laughs] If your cats are going crazy, let me know. Call me up, 208-535-1015. I'd love to hear about it.
Meow.
Okay, that's Silent Night. Let's jump, jump a ways in and see.
[instrumental music plays] It's hard to figure out the songs. They got timestamps on this? Oh, they do.
[cat meowing] [laughs] What is this song? 9 minutes, 40 seconds. Up on the housetop?
I guess it's Up on the Housetop. Huh. Ooh, Jingle Cats Medley. [laughs]
Only the best content for my audience. [cat meowing] Oh, geez. That's just piercing. [laughs]
All right, I won't torture y'all anymore.
Wanted to remind you that we've got an awesome prize up for grabs right now. I'm talking a guitar signed by tons of great bands. Who, might you ask? Well, it's signed by Bad Omens, Halestorm, Fall Out Boy, Nevertell, Sleep Theory-
Meow.
... and it could be your- You can't take it, Peaches.
[laughs]
Put it down, Peaches. It's for the listeners. Thanks to the Advocates Injury Attorneys.
Screw 'em.
No, Peaches. We have a prize.
I'm taking it for myself.
No.
One of us has to disagree-
Oh, okay. That's right
... according to Jade's rule.
Jade's rule does say one of us has to disagree. So Peaches, what do they need to do if they wanna win this guitar?
They need to download the app, first of all. Fill out the entry form on the K-BAR app. You can do so also on the Alt 101 app and the Cannonball 101 app as well. Sign up once per app, and then listen for the sounder. When you hear the sounder, be caller 20, and then you score an extra entry that way.
Looks like you need to up your sounder game, Peaches.
No, that's okay.
Yeah, you, you didn't play the sounder yesterday.
I'm trying to get people to use the app too 'cause there's been a lack of app signups, and it's super easy to just sign up through the app, you know?
Yeah, yeah, I mean, all you have to do is fill out the form. Bam! It's much harder to get through as caller number 20. So listen for that sounder. It's really easy to spot. It sounds like a ripping guitar solo thing that sounds Christmassy and it says, "Ho ho ho," and, "Call now."
You know, screw it. I'm just gonna take the guitar for myself.
No, Peaches, you can't have it. It's for the listeners and you need to leave it over there. Don't touch it.
I love how it's partially wrapped.
It... Yeah, I thought that they might rewrap it.
Turn off that alarm. What are you doing?
Oh, I've got these alarms for stuff I gotta do and I-
Take my med-
I'm a very, very busy man.
[laughs] Take my pills.
Uh, no- I should put a reminder for that.
Drink my prune juice.
I do have to keep my bowels-
[laughs]
... working properly. [laughs] Thankfully, I haven't had any stomach problems recent- Ah, I shouldn't have said it. I'm gonna choose myself.
No, knock on wood. Knock on wood, there's one branch there, come on.
I'm gonna choose myself.
There you go.
Is this wood? Particle board. It's pretty solid. Anyway, if you, uh, need more details on Merry Axemas with the Advocates Injury Attorneys, like Peaches said, "Fire up the app. The full scoop is in the app."
Thank you to the advocates for helping us out with this. This is cool.
Oh, yeah, it's an awesome prize. I mean, who wouldn't want that guitar? Peaches keeps trying to steal it.
Yeah. [laughs]
I'm surprised he didn't rewrap a different guitar and leave it [laughs] in the corner. So enter to win. We're gonna draw-
Ooh
... a winner one week from tomorrow.
I still could.
I shouldn't give you any ideas.
I should wrap that dumb guitar I have in my place and just-
[laughs]
... take that one.
Hand it off to the winner and then just run. [laughs]
And then just scram and go back to California where I belong, you know?
That's right. [laughs]
I've been told that this whole time living here.
Yes, go back where you came from, you git.
Oh, why are you coming in here bothering me?
Giving you more work to do.
I know. Dude, I'm... I keep giving myself more work. I'm an idiot. Yeah.
Even the Christmas gift I gave you was work.
Yeah, that's why I gave it to the kids to do.
[laughs]
It has like, "Put this together." [laughs] And they were like, "All right, cool."
[laughs]
Then I sent you a photo of it completed as if I had done it myself.
Of course, because you like to take credit for other people's accomplishments.
[laughs] That's right.
[laughs]
Uh, you know, the, the Christmas present you got me was very funny. It was a little Lego set-
Uh-
... and it was of a cat.
... uh, mini building blocks.
Oh, excuse me, they were, uh, not official Lego brand.
[laughs]
Uh, but it was of a, uh, cat cleaning itself. [laughs]
[laughs] Very, very funny.
Yeah, um, and so you gave these to everybody.
Well, you're the only one got the, the hygienic cat.
Oh, okay, everybody else got like-
Everyone just got like one that was just sitting or, you know?
Okay, normal-
Yeah
... normal, uh-
Uh, uh-
... building block things.
... mostly dogs because there's only like four people in this whole building that like cats that can't be trusted. The rest are dog people, so they're okay.
Dog people are a bunch of weirdos. Oh, wait, sorry, Becca.
[laughs]
Uh, you're, you're, you're cool. [laughs] She is a weirdo though, but that-
Yeah
... that's what I like about her. Yeah, or one of the things. [laughs]
[laughs] But these things, uh, came from across the sea, so they're a little
n- not well-built. [laughs]
Yeah, they're not up, up to the Lego standard.
[laughs] And very difficult to read the instructions to put them together.
Yeah, I saw Justin working on his yesterday, and, uh, I heard him complaining about it-
[laughs]
... a little bit. Like you said, everybody's been complaining about it.
Oh, yeah. You need to go ask Shantel about her experience. She just gave up and was irritated. [laughs]
[laughs]
So much so that Classy started talking crap on Classy the other day about it. [laughs]
Really?
[laughs]
Cla- you know, if Classy's talking crap, you must have got him really riled up.
Don't ever accept a present from Jade. [laughs]
[laughs] Yeah, I di- I didn't even attempt to put it together.
[laughs]
I just was like, "Here, I'm cooking food. Put this together." [laughs] Have fun, kids. [laughs]
That's... But they're, they're like, uh, maybe two inches tall, little-
Yeah, yeah
... figurine dog and cat-
Yeah, I think she-
... building blocks.
I heard Justin say something about, "It's got over 100 pieces!"
[laughs]
Ooh, so how many people have completed them that you're aware of?
Uh, Josh did his and Shantel's. Katie's still working on hers. Katie's really irritated about it too.
[laughs]
Justin got his. Uh, Jeff and Andrea.
Okay. See, I was working yesterday. While everyone else is playing with toys-
[laughs]
... I'm getting the job done around here.
They're working too.
I'm in a Christmas nightmare world that I created for myself 'cause, "Oh, it's not good enough."
Because-
And then I started it up again this morning.
Started the Christmas nightmare because you couldn't finish Outlaw?
Yeah, I'm gonna deal with that later. [laughs]
[laughs]
I was like, "Oh, this category. I bet it can be better." Now I got another list of songs I need to get, and then code, and blah bl- you know, I should just be a typical programmer and just copy what everybody else does in the big markets and call it good.
Yeah.
Why do actual research?
Put-
Why put the time in when there's an easy way?
Put four codes on there that don't mean anything.
Yeah, yeah. Just-
[laughs]
... y- you know,
take credit for other people's work. [laughs]
[laughs]
And just call it good.
That's right.
You know, why do I care so much? It's Christmas music. It, it airs for a month.[laughs]
[laughs]
But no, it's not good enough. Josh is... He's probably irritated with me, too. You gave him LEGOs, so he's irritated about that.
[laughs]
And then I'm like, "No, it's not good enough. You need to wait and, you know, you, you can deal with Jingle Bingo later. You know, I know it's a pain, but, uh, I've got to make this better. So you wait on me." [laughs]
You should try scheduling Jingle Bingo.
Um-
It's terrible.
I think I have scheduled it, and yeah, it sucks.
[laughs]
It's... You know? [laughs] There's gotta be a way we could somehow make it easier. I think, uh, I don't know what it would be, but-
I don't know what it is either.
Yeah. It's, uh... The list of songs is good, right? I didn't analyze the Jingle Bingle... Jingle Bingle?
Jingle Bingle.
Jingle Bingo songs list. Are you guys playing a bunch of duds in Jingle Bingo? 'Cause I'll be very frustrated if so.
Yep.
I-
It's all bottom of the barrel.
I don't stand for dud songs.
You don't stand for nothing, you pudgy-
I am sitting right now.
Oh, I can't finish that sentence. [laughs]
[laughs]
You pudgy mini building block nut maker.
Yeah, I guess Josh has already made the bingo cards, right?
Yeah.
Okay, so I've... I, I can't holler at him and be like, "These are a bunch of duds!" [laughs]
[laughs]
"What are you doing?" [laughs] I'll check it out for next year. I'll put that on my to-do list for 2026. Make sure Jingle Bingo isn't full of duds. [laughs] Hey, have you heard the, uh, the song, uh, Is That You, Santa Claus?
Nope.
It's, it's a hit and Josh don't wanna play it. I think it's real... It's Louis Armstrong, you know? << Da, da, da, da, da >> You know that guy?
Yep.
Yeah, it's a really fun song. [laughs] << Is that you, Santa Claus? >> It's awesome.
Do we need to play that back to back with, what is it, DMX?
Uh, it w- it would fit in really good with DMX.
[laughs] Was he, was he the one that did that?
Rudolph?
<< Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer >>
[laughs] Yeah.
[laughs]
I, I found some pretty wild Christmas songs. Like, Sabrina Carpenter has a whole bunch of really foul Christmas songs that... You know, they, they're popular, but I, I don't think they'd fly on a, a classy Christmas. So I'm doing my best to keep it nice and clean, but I did find one that'll work, so... Classy Christmas gonna be better than ever starting Monday. And Josh, you just wait. You wait and work on your LEGOs, dude.
[laughs]
You're not done with your-
Mini building blocks.
Oh, mini building blocks. [laughs]
'Cause if you look up the other word, you won't find 'em.
N- ah, okay. All right, but-
It's gotta be mini building blocks.
Well, and I would, I would presume that mini building blocks are probably more affo- affordable than the, uh, name brand.
Oh, by far.
[laughs]
I'm not spending a lot of money on you guys.
Why didn't it, they make their kids put 'em together?
[laughs]
Come on. Come on, guys. What are you, stupid? [laughs]
[laughs]
[instrumental music plays] Now, when it comes to the internet and facts, you just never know. So don't take anything I'm about to tell you at face value and it... You know, just accept it as real. But I stumbled across a post, "What is a true fact so baffling it should be false?" And I'm just gonna read through 'em and we'll just assume they're real. [laughs] Like that the largest natural predator of the moose, what do you think that would be? You know, grizzly bear? No, orca whale. Apparently, yeah, orcas just mow down and eat moose according to this internet user. Am I going to Google it up and see if it's true? No. No, I'm not. [laughs] Just because I, you know, need to run outside and get a breakfast sandwich here in a second from the lady. I know she's patiently waiting for me. Uh, this one says, "The oldest continuously running business in the world is the Kongo Gumi, a construction company founded in 578 in Japan, making it 1,445 years old." Is that true? I don't know. [laughs] If Wayne Gretzky had never scored a single goal in his entire NHL career, he would still be the all-time points leader based on assists alone. Is that true? Well, we'll just accept that it's true. Uh, let's see here. This says, "In the '90s, Montana did away with speed limits outside of city limits and traffic deaths dropped. When the federal government forced Montana to reinstate speed limits or lose federal highway funds, traffic deaths rose." I seem to vaguely remember the, uh, the no speed limits in Montana thing. That must not have lasted very long, 'cause I certainly didn't get to, uh, enjoy just flying through Montana. Um, well, I think if you're driving at high speed, well hopefully, you're paying a little bit more attention. Let's see. "We put a man on the moon before we put wheels on suitcases." I could believe that. [laughs] Some genius someday was, "I'm sick of lugging this heavy thing around full of all these shoes.
Put some wheels on this thing." Yeah.
All right, let's see here. "Concrete hardens just as fast underwater as in the open air." Is that true? That's weird. I- is it, uh, like it, it, it won't, uh, stay liquid-ish unless you're mixing it? That's strange. Anyway, um, I gotta, I gotta go get my food. [instrumental music plays] Well, thank you to my love for bringing me and Peaches some breakfast. So kind. I need the fuel, that's for sure, to get through the Christmas mayhem. But in the meantime, let's talk more about these facts so baffling they should be false. Again, I don't know if these are true or not.[instrumental music plays] I'm just readin' stuff online. You guys wanna share a bunch of stuff on Facebook before verifying if it's true? That's what I'm gonna do for this radio show. I'm going to assume that all of these supposed facts are true, and leave it at that. Uh, so I'm, I'm gonna throw out "allegedly true" for all of these, and don't, you know, come at me if you find out that these are false. Just trying to do a radio show here. All right, this user says, "We ground up and painted with, or ate, most of the ancient Egyptian mummies we dug up." Yeah, uh, people did used to, uh, I, I know I've r- read this somewhere, you know, think that, you know, mummies could, like, cure ailments and things like that. That, that's really weird
to be grinding up old dead bodies and
using 'em for anything, but jeez. Uh, let's see here, "Mosquitoes are responsible for more human deaths than humans are. The mosquito is the most dangerous creature in the world in the sense that it is responsible for more human deaths than any other animal." I knew there was a reason I hate those mosquitoes, aside from the fact that I have a very bad reaction when they bite me. Get rid of 'em! They don't do any good, do they? They're not, like, a major food source or anything?
Maybe their purpose is, well, just wiping us out, yeah? I mean, look at the damage humans have done to the Earth. Like when animal populations, you know, get too big, they kinda just naturally start taking care of themselves. Mosquitoes, Earth's way of just crushing us down. Let's see here. This sounds unbelievable. I don't know if this is true. It says, "If you lined up all the planets in the solar system side by side, they would fit between the Earth and the moon." I, that doesn't sound true. That sounds made up to me. Again, see, this is why you can't just believe facts online. All right, let's see here. Oh, I watched a video about this the other day, the double slit experiment. It's something to do with particles, and... I am not even gonna attempt to explain it, okay? JD actually, that, that was it. JD sent me a video about this, and it, it's one of those things that hurts your brain. But if you wanna look it up on YouTube, just Google up the double slit experiment. There's no way I'm gonna be able to try to explain this, 'kay? I just happened to watch a video about it recently,
and it was, again, ugh, made, made my brain hurt. We're living in a simulation, people. Let's see, "A banana is a berry, but strawberries aren't." I think I've heard that before. "21% of Americans are functionally illiterate." I, I would believe that, simply based on my Facebook feed [laughs]. Sorry! Uh, let's see here. Now, now we're starting to get into, uh,
stuff where I think, uh, people are just making jokes here and things like that. All right. Holy crap, 9:48? Awesome. I'll be back in a minute. Show's almost over, people.
Well, hello Peaches.
I found out you can do something cool with OBS. I was taking screenshots.
You can take screenshots with OBS?
Yeah, you can open it up, press Control + 1 now, and you can take a picture of yourself. I updated my Instagram profile pic [laughs].
[laughs] Very nice, Peaches.
And I'm just smiling, looking like an idiot in here [laughs].
Well, I'm glad you're being productive.
Hey, you know what? I'm not like a couple of other people here in the building who are messing with their Lego sets that they were gifted to from, uh, from Jade.
Yes, have you put your Legos together?
No.
I don't touch things like that.
Um, well, you, you're a big guy, so those little tiny Legos, I bet that would be a total pain. Justin was very frustrated with the Legos.
Oh yeah, and he, but he finished his, and I think Katie's still not done.
Yeah, I gave mine to, uh, Taryn last night and was like, "Put this together," and she did while I cooked dinner.
Aubrey does have some, uh, nieces and nephews that I could just be like, "Hey, mess around with this," you know?
[laughs] That's what you do. Get, give the toys to the kids, they'll put 'em together, and then you take a picture and send it to Jade, and act like you put it together.
Sure.
That's what I did [laughs]. And, uh, shout out and thanks to Peaches for bringing me a creepy elf, like, uh, you know, the one Josh and you have. I haven't figured out a name for it yet. Um, we'll, we'll let the kids do that.
Okay.
They did say it was creepy, and I put it up on top of a, you know, I have that TV picture frame thing hanging in the corner?
Well, Becca's daughter was very creeped out by it. Your kids were just like, "Oh, cool."
Well, they like creepy stuff.
But you can tell, like, they're related to you [laughs].
Yeah, they like weird stuff. So, yes, thank you for the creepy elf. I'm, uh, happy to have that as a addition to the Christmas decorations. You saw we had two Christmas trees up?
I, I did.
And, uh, we're gonna do, uh, Christmas, a, a good chunk of Christmas today.
Your house sounds like a, um... Well, when I pulled up, you had the sound bar at, like, almost full volume. Probably not even actually full volume, probably, like, halfway up?
Were they playing, uh-
Beat Sabers?
Beat Saber, yeah.
Yeah, so I pulled up and it sounded like one of those dudes that drives down your street in, like, a, a Yukon with subs in the back-
[laughs]
... you know? It, the whole house was vibrating.
Well, and what's funny is, you know, I was telling the kids, when they started playing Beat Saber, I'm like, "Turn it up." Like, "What are you doing?"
[laughs]
"I have this sound system for a reason." So, I kept turning it up, and then when I'd leave the room, they'd turn it back down. And then we were watching a movie, and I'm like, "Turn it up. I can't hear it." And they're like-
Oh
... "Dad, you're just old and deaf."
I missed my opportunity. I, I wish we, uh, turned on Bill Murray Hard to Tell, the new track.
Yeah.
'Cause there's a thick sub drop.
Yeah.
It, it would've vibrated the whole neighborhood.
I need to check that one out, uh, tonight when I get home.
And there's a new Spotify exclusive single from Bill Murray-
Ooh
... that came out for, uh, last night. It's for, like, this new Netflix show called, like, Cyberpunk something, I don't know what it is, but-
[laughs]
It, it doesn't sound like traditional Bill Murray. It's definitely his voice, but it doesn't sound like that... It doesn't have that country sound to it.
Okay. Well, then I should check it. Is it, like, more rocking or more metal?
More pop-
More pop
... I think. Yeah.
Oh, okay.
I, I had it barely on this morning. I was kind of, like, half awake when I turned it on, I'm-
Mm-hmm.
I just opened Spotify and saw that,and was like, "Okay, lemme listen to some of this while I get dressed and ready to go."
Ah. All right. Well, check out new Bill Murray, everybody, and then, uh, here in a couple hours, Peaches and I will be back for the noon hour of madness and mayhem. Speaking of madness, I'm gonna continue on my, uh, Christmas project I'm working on here, 'cause I like to make myself crazy, Peaches. So, yeah.
Well, you are the best programmer here in the area when it comes to Christmas music, so...
Dang right.
Anybody else except for Josh sucks. That's right.
Now, we're gonna... For Classy '97, I was hearing some talks about them bringing in the ghost of Casey Kasem, 'cause they wanted to bring in some old, uh, celebrity to kind of, you know, try to boost listenersship.
[laughs]
So-
No... Well, no, you'd need, uh, like a... The C-list part of the celebrities.
Oh.
You know? Like, just m- maybe a relative of Casey Kasem.
We brought in-
[laughs]
... Larry the Cable Guy's brother.
[laughs]
To host... To host a show.
Mike the Pipe Guy.
[laughs]
We br- we brought him in.
That's right. [laughs]
[laughs]
Mike the Plumber.
He recently moved to Shelley-
[laughs]
... and so he's gonna, he's gonna host Classy 97's, uh, nightly program.
That's right.
He has wonderful stories.
[laughs] All right, everybody. Enjoy the rest of your morning. I'm gonna go eat that food. Yeah. Yeah, I'm hungry.
I just ate mine.
Was it good?
Oh, it's delicious.
All right, I can't wait. [instrumental music plays] Thank you again for tuning in to the Victor Wilt Show. This program's a production of Riverbend Media Group. To contact the show or for more information, hit us up at riverbendmediagroup.com.