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Every person has a style, and every style deserves support. Enter your style strategy cheerleader and founder of BU Style, Natalie Tincher. Since 2010 Natalie has worked with hundreds of personal clients as well as large corporations and a major global news network—and she is here to guide you.
In this podcast, you will gain clarity and insights on how to connect your style with your authentic self through Natalie's style expertise as well as interviews with other style-supporting guests like designers, clients, and other professionals in and out of the fashion industry.
Whether you love fashion, fear fashion, or fall somewhere in between, it doesn't matter. This isn't about fashion; it's about exploring who you are and how to own your unique style identity. This podcast will help you cut through the noise and examine your personal style holistically so you can "wear who you are" every day.
0:00:00 - Natalie Tincher
Remember, your shoes are literally supporting your entire body and I dare say that they are the most functionally important item in your wardrobe. Welcome to Wear who you Are, a podcast that takes the fear out of fashion and holds space for everyone to explore how to connect your authenticity with your personal style. I'm your host, natalie Tinsher, founder of VU Style, expert style strategist, and your enthusiastic friend and safe space of support. I believe that every person has a style and every style deserves a seat. With over a decade of experience working with hundreds of personal clients, I've learned a thing or two about how to help others have a healthy and holistic approach to navigating how to build a wardrobe that reflects who you are. So pull up your seat and let's get started. Thanks for coming back to another Wear who you Are Wednesday we are talking about shoes. This month we're doing a solo episode today, nat Chat Style School. And then we've got one of my favorite brands, marine, who is one of the co-founders of Nomase, the brand I love, coming next week. Then we're going to come back and talk about some shoe care. So it's all about shoe love, true love. But before I get to that today, I'm going to start by sharing a personal announcement, because we're all on a journey together.
I mentioned that I am in the process of writing a book and it really has been a huge learning process. It's like a school in and of itself. So some people have asked what the process is and I said I would share. So I've decided to go in the traditional publishing route, which means that I had to put together a book proposal, which I did last year. I got a great writing coach and I submitted proposals to various agents. Now the proposal was much more extensive than I realized in the beginning. Just so you know, it included an author bio, included an overview, all of my table of contents, including chapter summaries. For each chapter. I had to write a full sample chapter, then a competitive analysis, my marketing and network. I think that was it. In total, the proposal was about 60 pages long, and so once it was in that form and ready to go, it went to various book agents and I was very fortunate to have a few that were interested, so I was able to meet with them. They interviewed me, I interviewed them. We got to get a vibe for each other, because how it works is that your agent is your advocate and they don't make money if you don't make money if your book doesn't go to a publisher. So you want somebody who's really advocating for you, who believes in you, who you feel comfortable working with. So I was very lucky that when I spoke to various agents, I found one that I was really excited about and we have a really great rapport and she was very excited about my project. Her name is Jane, so we have a contract signed and I officially have a book agent and we are in the process of revising the proposal and, as she has said, to make every sentence sing and it will soon go out to publishers and hopefully I will um, next steps I'll be able to report back is that I have a deal and then I got to write the damn thing, as I say. So thanks for following along and, um, I will keep you apprised on what happens next.
So now onto the topic at hand in today's style school, and that is shoes. Now, since the pandemic in particular, many of my clients and that includes myself in this have decided to ditch the antiquated adage of pain is beauty. When it comes to shoes, I've basically refused to wear annoying, uncomfortable high heels and we're swapping it for stepping out in style to actually support our active lifestyles, and we're swapping it for stepping out in style to actually support our active lifestyles and just the desire to be comfortable. This sounds really great, right, like yay, go feminism, go comfortable shoes. But outside of sneakers, some people are finding it very hard to find your soulmate, and pun is obviously intended there. So first, you know I'm going to walk you through this. I'm going to talk to you about your strategic shopping list when it comes to shoes. Cause a lot of people, that really has been a space the last few seasons of working with my clients where they're like I just I feel like my shoes are wrong, I need shoes, and they don't know what those shoes are, and so this does take some thought and strategy on your part to really identify what the shoes are, and these days it seems like we don't really feel like we have the right shoes besides sneakers. Maybe you go to events and you're like oh, I don't, I don't have the right thing. So here's how to start identifying what those shoe needs may be.
When you're putting together an outfit, when are you missing a shoe? When? What are those moments where you say to yourself this would be a great outfit if I only had the right shoe. So start logging those. What types of shoe are you missing? Is it a specific dress level or is it a matter that you don't have the style of shoe to fit your outfit silhouette? For example, if you ditched your skinny jeans, like many people did, did you update your shoes to work with this new denim silhouette? So in my case, I found a lot of my clients were missing in the fall and even into the spring winter, a mid-shaft boot that their non-skinny pants could go over. So a lot of people still had that little ankle booty or something that was a thicker shaft that they would put over their skinny jeans. So that was one really key shoe that they were missing.
Or let's say you lean too much into one style or season of shoe that you're missing shoes for a particular occasion or season or dress code. I was in this category when I decided I wasn't going to suffer in my sky high heels, as I said, to go to events like weddings. So I realized when I was putting together outfits for a bunch of weddings we had last year that I didn't have a black stiletto pump replacement. I had a pair of old black stiletto pumps that I would suffer in that were probably almost four inches really thin heel. They are death traps. I used to call them my dress shoes. I refused to wear them any longer. So I realized that when I was putting together my shoe strategy that I didn't have a comfortable go-to works with most things dress shoe for events that I was going to. So those are some ways that you can start to identify what your shoe needs may be In terms of seasons.
I'm finding right now a lot of my clients don't have what we call a shoulder season closed toe spring shoe. They have their boots, what we call a shoulder season closed toe spring shoe. They have their boots. They have sandals for summer, they have sneakers for comfort, but they don't have maybe a loafer or a flat or some sort of kitten heel that works for the spring season when they want something lighter, brighter, but it's not quite sandal season.
Do you fall into this category? Maybe this is you. Maybe you're shaking your head and saying, oh yep, totally me. So now that you've identified the general shoe type you need, now we're going to start getting more specific so we can narrow down your choices and give you a really good strategy. Your shoes should not only complement your styling needs, as we've just identified, but they should also support your feet throughout the duration of the time you're wearing them. So we're going to talk about in these shoe categories, let's talk about your comfort and what you actually need them for. So let's talk about the shoulder season closed-toe shoe, for example, just for sake of having something to follow. Is this a shoe that you're going to wear for a long period of time on your feet? So, if so, what are the comfort considerations that you really need? What are those non-negotiable things For me?
I had this gap last year and I needed something that I could wear in lieu of a sneaker. For my feet in particular, traditional ballet flat just wasn't going to cut it. I'm literally on my feet shopping for hours and by the end of the day, the lack of support in a ballet flat causes my feet to like swell extra. They feel like I'm stuffing sausages in my shoes at that point and the vamp starts cutting into my foot. So I feel like I'm like basically walking on the sidewalk with something jammed in my foot. It's really awful. I actually had an experience that I think I shared on social media where I thought that I had a quote unquote comfortable pair of ballet flats and I didn't really think about how uncomfortable they were going to be by the end of the day and I was so miserable, so it's really not good for me. I'm actually more comfortable in a small block heel, like maybe one or two inches, like a court heel, because it accommodates my higher arches and accommodates my foot expanding. My toe box seems to expand the most during the day.
So a softer leather or cloth was also important for me when I was looking for the shoulder season shoe. But for me I could eliminate cloth because New York City has dirty streets If you've been here, you know so a leather stays nicer. So that's considerations you can go through when you're thinking about the comfort that you need. Is it a shoe that you're going to be on your feet a lot for long hours? Or maybe you're not, but you still can't stand in a heel for more than a little bit, so you want to block heel. So those are just things to start thinking about as they relate to you and your comfort needs.
So now that you've determined these pragmatic needs, let's talk about style. Do you want to wear this jean, this shoe with jeans or dresses? What shoe, shape or form will fill in the gaps that you identified that you have when you were putting together those outfits or when you were thinking about your wardrobe for this season? If you don't really know what that is, where you're just like I'm missing a shoe, in whatever category it is. Let's say, it's the shoulder season, and this is where I want you to go and get some inspiration, and doing a little bit of research is a useful thing so you can start to hone in on your options that might work for you. So it's at this point when you can look at some of your style Pinterest boards or maybe your favorite style content creators who have a similar style, personality or wardrobe as you, or maybe you can go to some of the brands your go-to brands that you love, or retailers, to see what they have and to start getting some inspiration.
This exercise can help you visualize how certain styles will integrate with your personal style in your closet. So that's where, if you are following someone that has a similar style or similar key pieces as you, you could see oh, they style, you know that look with a loafer or whatever it is. So you can start to visualize yourself in that. So I want you to visualize you with your wardrobe in those pieces to say, yeah, maybe that works. I can't really picture myself wearing that. So the goal is for the shoe to feel really current but also align with your personal style. So this isn't going to the list first and saying, oh, everybody's telling me a ballet flat isn't. Everybody's telling me a Mary Jane isn't. So then you feel like you have to retroactively put that trend into yourself. This is starting with yourself first. So you'll actually want to wear this shoe and it actually will work for you this season and hopefully seasons to come. So from here you should be narrowing it down. So hopefully in your head you're starting to X out the things that don't work and starting to have a picture of what it could look like.
So for me and my example of a shoulder season shoe I needed last year for this spring, I narrowed it down to a loafer. I just generally love loafers and I have other loafers, so that was one of the curiosities. It was like I love loafers, I have loafers, why don't I have what I need? Well, off the bat I could determine they were too heavy, so I had the really like thick lug sole heavy loafers and when I think about wearing them, they didn't really go throughout the day and they were all black or dark colors. We were talking about spring, so I wanted something lighter that went when I pulled out my like Chris white shirts. Like what loafer did I have or what shoe did I have that would brighten everything up for spring? I really didn't have anything for spring and summer.
So, given that I knew I wanted something in a lighter color, a more streamlined silhouette, not the chunky soles, because this was spring Again I wanted to start feeling lighter. I wanted it to go with the wardrobe that I have. I wanted it to work with jeans, nice trousers and casual dresses or skirts. So I really wanted these to be a workhorse. I wanted them to be a go-to piece. So that was where I had come to.
So the next step, before you even start shopping, is to determine your investment then. So I knew what I wanted. I knew where I was going to wear it. Now what's the investment? Going back to my example, I just said I needed these shoes to be a shoe hero and I wanted them for many years. So I was willing to invest. So, before I even shopped, I set a pretty healthy budget range, kind of understanding what the brands I would be looking at would cost. So I gave myself a healthy budget, so my cost per wear was going to be low. So, knowing all these factors before you even start shopping the style, the comfort considerations, your budget helps you make a smarter decision and it helps you keep from making an impulsive decision so you can narrow down the thousands and thousands of options out there.
So now let's talk about where to shop. We've talked about this before in clothing. We've talked about this on a macro level, but in stores or online, per usual, both options have their pros and have their cons, as you know if you have listened to those solo episodes on shopping, in-store shopping for shoes specifically, it allows you to try on the shoes, it allows you to assess their comfort right off the bat. It allows you to compare what else is in the store easily, walk through, get inspiration, touch the shoe, feel the shoe right in that moment. And it's also easier to try sizes up or down. So if you try on a shoe and you're normally a seven and you try one on, you're like I think I want to try it a half size up, just to see our half size down. You can do that more easily in stores, usually provided they have the inventory. Of course.
The downside is that I generally find in-store shoe selections to be pretty limited these days when I'm shopping with my clients. A lot of times we do have to do shoes online, especially in price points that are quality, some of the more independent designers, nice leathers. It's hard to find that gap sometimes in department stores. So it really depends on the type of shoe you're looking for for in-store. I find that if it's something like sneakers, there's a lot of specialty sneaker stores. So maybe that's the way to go is that you go to a specialty sneaker store. Then you can try on a bunch of different styles, colors, brands. But on the other hand, online shopping does offer a wider selection of not only brands but also fit considerations. So if you do have a specialty fit like wide or narrow, usually a lot of times stores won't carry those in the store, even if it's a brand that does carry wide or narrow, a lot of times you have to get that online. So sometimes you only have the option of shopping online. The other advantage of online shopping is that you have your entire closet at your fingertips when you're trying on the shoes that come in, so you can instantly pair the potential winners with your key outfits that you're looking to create, because you've already identified those considerations, so you can make sure that they actually do work. Of course, online shopping the returns, especially for shoes, are a little bit more annoying. It's just can be cumbersome. So if you're not into that, then you know maybe that's not something you want to consider and you want to just find something in the stores. As always, if you do shop online or in stores, be sure to check your return policies. It's always helpful to read customer reviews before you shop online to ensure that the positive experience. Or if most people are saying size up a half size, then maybe you know that you should do that too.
Now let's talk about first shoes, then finding the right fit. So do you remember the days when you were a kid? This is like one of my favorite core memories as a kid was going in back to school shopping and they had that little foot contraption that they measured your foot. I have really vivid memories of that, of going to JC Penney's and getting my feet measured every year to find your shoe size and it was pretty formulaic, right? It's pretty crazy that we don't do that still, because my feet have changed I don't know if anyone else's have, I know a few of my clients have where a few years ago I went up a half size, don't know why, probably standing a lot.
Just you know your feet are supporting a lot, so proper sizing and fit are really crucial for the comfort of foot health. For a while I was suffering and I was like, nope, just get rid of your half size smaller shoes, natalie. This isn't worth it Because, remember, sizing also can vary between brands and styles. So don't be afraid to try on multiple sizes, even with shoes. They call it the last, or the form of the shoe, depending on brands, could be a little tighter, a little wider. There's just a lot of things that could affect the fit of the shoe. Another tip when you're shopping for shoes or trying shoes on, is to do it later in the day, when your feet are slightly swollen. So our feet do swell throughout the day, so you want to try on your shoes when they're already swollen. It's also a good idea to wear the type of socks that you'll typically wear with the shoe to get an accurate feel for the fit and the size.
Now, another note on fit that I just want to throw in there is that many shoe salespeople will tell you oh, this shoe will stretch. Don't forget, the shoe will stretch. Especially, I find this, when they only have the size that you're trying on and they want to make the sale. Maybe not all of them, but that could be a consideration. So while I know that, objectively, leather does stretch, I don't want you to rely on this. Especially if the shoe is just generally too tight all around or too small, then just don't buy it.
Don't rely on the fact that it's going to stretch. Try the next size up, if you can, or just take a pass on the shoe, just like, truly, I can't say enough. Don't count on the entire shoe to stretch and then you go through the pains of blisters. Then maybe it's not even going to work out for you. That's really frustrating. I think a lot of us have been there. However, if there is just one spot that's tight on the foot especially if this is a common problem you have, so say that you try shoes on a lot and you're like, oh, this one spot is always tight, but the rest of it feels good, or the other foot feels great, and there's this one little spot on this foot. That always happens.
A pro tip is that you can actually get shoes professionally stretched in specific spots. So if you have a good cobbler, this is a resource that you'll want to have, and we will talk about some of these things in an upcoming episode. You can take the shoe in and they can pre-stretch the shoe for you to keep you from having to suffer through this pain of it growing too, and it also makes the shoe look better because they'll stretch in a way that's that fits with the mold of the shoe. We did this with my husband, troy, and a pair of boots he had, so they generally fit well, but on one foot there was this tight spot on the sides. This is generally an ongoing issue for him with certain boots and leather shoes in particular. So we took it to a professional cobbler and he a really good cobbler and this is one way that you can tell will make you try on this shoe and then he marked the exact spot that needed to be stretched, stretched it professionally, and then Troy put the shoes on. He's like, wow, that made such a huge difference. So those are general, just guidelines for finding shoes.
So let's say you did it. Let's say you found your soulmate. I don't want you to just like, celebrate and go into the world. So before you take them out into the wild, remember that when you scuff up the bottom of the shoe, you cannot return them. I want you to do one more exercise. That exercise is something that I had to learn the hard way and I started doing and that's to literally picture yourself in the settings and the situations in which you're going to wear these shoes.
Think about going through the actual motions of the day or the event that you're going to be wearing these shoes to. I'll use my example of the loafer. I chose a pair from Nomase, who's coming next week, and I loved them. I could picture myself wearing them in one of my uniforms. So I did this visualization. Let me think about wearing them in a pair of loose jeans, a T oversized blazer.
And then I pictured myself in a day that I would wear these, like a busy day, walking from home to the subway, and I thought about hmm, what if the escalators are broken? Will I be cursing my shoes Because I've done this before having to walk down the escalators and walk up them. And then I thought of moving through the sidewalks of New York from store to store, pre-shopping for a client in a hurry, and then meeting the client, interacting with them for two to three hours, while also maybe having to rush and swap sizes or find additional garments for them in a fitting room, all while being present, interacting with them happily. And then I, you know, like I said, I thought about this in a typical full day. And then what if I had to immediately go to meet Troy for dinner or go to the theater with my friends, started to think about walking through the day in these shoes. It helped me.
Number one, consider is the size right that I have on? Are they too tight, too loose? How am I going to wear them? And two, it helped me think about are these going to serve my day? I could picture like, do my feet hurt? Yeah, they probably hurt because I've been on my feet all day. But do they hurt because this is a shoe that I feel like, oh, this one spot's probably going to cut in, or I think this heel's comfortable. By the end of the day, the balls of my feet are going to hurt. It really is a visualization exercise that has helped me.
Like I said, I'm going to be tired either way. If you're on your feet all day, your feet are going to hurt. They're literally supporting your whole body. But are these shoes going to be minimal tiresomeness? Are they going to truly support my body? Because, remember, your shoes are literally supporting your entire body and I dare say that they're the most functionally important item in your wardrobe because they are. They help your back, they help so many different things. So that's what I really want you to think about with shoes. They are not an afterthought. They should be something that has a lot of thought and strategy to them, and oftentimes they are a place that I recommend that you invest in and we are, like I said, going to talk about in an upcoming episode.
If you do invest in your shoes, and even if you don't, what can you do to care for them from start to finish? You found your glass slipper. It's the perfect fit. Maybe you invested them. You know I I gotten a lot of questions about this shoe care spot, so we'll, we will talk about this, but until then, you're where, who you are challenge is to do a spring summer shoe inventory.
Do you have what you need? If you feel like there are gaps, work through the exercises in this episode to find the right shoe that supports you to wear who you are from the bottom up. So go through these exercises we talked about. Of what styles are you missing? What occasions are you missing things? For what comfort needs do you have? What are you going to budget? All the things we talked about? Because I want you to feel like you have the right shoes in your closet and that your whole wardrobe is cohesive.
If you're looking for some inspiration in this current season, you can follow along my business account at BU style and you can check out. We're going to do some shoe posts in the coming months Um some different brands and styles that you could look at and see what resonates with you. Or you can check out the show notes for a link to some shoppable shoe styles as well for inspiration. Thanks so much for joining me today and we will see you next time. Thanks for joining another Wear who you Are Wednesday. If you enjoyed this episode and you'd like to help support the podcast, please share it with others, post about it on social media or leave a rating and review. Be sure to follow along for episode news updates and other bonus style insights on Instagram through my business account at Bustyle that's the letters B-U-S-T-Y-E-L or my personal account at Natalie underscore Tincture. And don't forget to subscribe to Wear who you Are wherever you listen to your podcasts. Thanks again and see you next time.