WEBVTT 00:00:01.920 --> 00:00:11.175 Thanks for tuning in to the Sandals Church podcast. Our vision as a church is to be real with ourselves, god, and others. We're glad you're here, and we we hope you enjoy this message. 00:00:14.035 --> 00:00:21.700 Welcome to Sandal's Church. Man, I have been so just pumped up about this this series. How many of you guys have enjoyed the series called Him? Raise your hands. Amen. 00:00:21.920 --> 00:00:38.020 Yes. I wanna challenge you to think about a young man, maybe a neighbor, somebody that's struggling. Look, we're losing men in our society, and I want you to know, guys, I'm not here to pick on you. I'm here to pick you up. I'm not here to put you down. 00:00:38.020 --> 00:00:57.290 I'm here to lift you up. And so I just wanna encourage you guys and and and let me just say, ladies of Samuels Church, I am just so blessed by so many of the ladies that have come up to me and said thank you for that message. And I just thank God that we have women in our church who are saying, you know what? We'll take a couple weeks and we'll just speak to the men because they need it. And so let's give the ladies a hand. 00:00:57.290 --> 00:01:08.635 Thank you so much. I appreciate you. Last week, I went to Montana on a man trip. Anybody ever been on a man trip? Yes, yes, couple of you guys. 00:01:08.635 --> 00:01:25.395 It was my first man trip. And, so that's You go to Montana, because there are no men in California. And, I went to Montana, ran into some ex sandalites in the airport, like, we moved. And I was like, quitters. Just kidding. 00:01:25.395 --> 00:01:37.605 Keep tithing from other states. Appreciate it. But, you know, when I first started Sandals Church, and I would tell people I'm from California, they'd go, wow. And now as I travel, people go, how? How? 00:01:39.105 --> 00:01:48.570 But, went up there to Montana, actually wasn't in Montana. Day 3, I found out we were in Wyoming. Yes. I heard somebody say, Wyoming. I was like, what state are we in? 00:01:48.570 --> 00:02:08.130 And, I was in the wrong state mentally for 3 days. But, it was it was out in Wyoming. We were on a ranch in the middle of nowhere, just us, mountain lions, all kinds of things that wanna eat you and kill you. And, there was a lot of manly men there from Texas, Missouri. You know you're a man when your state sounds, like, miserable. 00:02:08.130 --> 00:02:19.720 Amen? Like, Missouri. And they put me my roommate was a black guy from Chicago. So the 2 guys that don't belong in the wilderness were together. And I thought I would comfort him. 00:02:19.720 --> 00:02:38.380 Right before we went to bed the 1st night, I said, why do you think, most serial killers are middle aged white men? I really said that. My wife is always, when I preach, she's like, why did you say that? I'm like, you have no idea what I didn't say. You don't you don't realize the restraint. 00:02:39.400 --> 00:03:01.600 And, so I love you Derek if you're watching from Chicago, and I didn't eat you or put you in a jar. So, but but we were up there together and, just talking, all all of these pastors from all these states. And, you know, to various degrees, every pastor is saying, we're struggling reaching men. We're struggling connecting with men. It's it's a huge, huge problem. 00:03:02.135 --> 00:03:11.320 I got back into California. One of the things I love about California, and it's one of the most beautiful things that we export, In N Out Burger. Amen? Anybody? Like, there's just there's just nothing like it. 00:03:11.480 --> 00:03:25.565 5 Guys, be quiet. It's the best. But listen to me. I went to In N Out Burger right by Ontario airport when I flew in and for the first time, I saw something I'd never seen. At In N Out Burger, every single worker was a woman. 00:03:26.665 --> 00:03:36.805 Now, ladies, I'm not putting you down. I'm just saying where are the guys? Where are the guys? Like, when I was growing up, that would have been unheard of. You might have seen 1 woman at In N Out Burger. 00:03:37.045 --> 00:03:57.325 Now they all were 8 of them. I counted 8 women flipping burgers, doing fries, taking orders, running the burger stand. There's a shortage of men. For the first time in our country's history, we have more young men under 40 who are not looking for work than are. It's a huge, huge problem. 00:03:58.105 --> 00:04:12.085 But I don't wanna talk today about how to be a man. I wanna talk about how to be a godly man. I wanna talk about what we need to do as a church. How do we wake up men and become godly men? Because this is what we need. 00:04:12.085 --> 00:04:23.470 Hey, Sandals Church. Thank you so much for joining us for today's message. I wanted to take a brief moment and invite you into the work that Sandals Church is doing. One way you can do that is by giving financially. You can head to give.sc and give there. 00:04:23.470 --> 00:04:25.410 For now, let's get back into our message. 00:04:26.575 --> 00:04:44.135 And the first thing I wanna challenge you to do is godly men, listen to me, need a challenge. Ladies, mamas, stop blocking and tackling and snow plowing for your little boys. Let him figure it out. He needs a challenge. That's the only way that we man up. 00:04:44.135 --> 00:04:49.095 And let me tell you something. Some of you guys, you think, oh, God keeps throwing all these lightning bolts at me. No. No. No. 00:04:49.095 --> 00:05:03.825 He's trying to challenge you to step up. He's not trying to make life easy for you. He made life difficult because you can handle it. You need a challenge. Ladies, let your little boy experience some pain. 00:05:03.825 --> 00:05:22.195 Let him experience some suffering. You don't have to do what my grandpa did and let him touch the electric fence, but you can let him cry a bit. You can let him figure it out. We don't make our kids stronger by solving every problem for them. We let them solve it. 00:05:22.195 --> 00:05:38.145 We let them figure it out. The Bible is full of champions. The Bible's full of heroes, but one of my favorite heroes is David. And David's a young boy with way too much free time, and he's out in the wilderness watching over the flocks of his father's herd. He encounters lions. 00:05:38.285 --> 00:05:58.795 He encounters bears. He encounters all kinds of challenges. But he needed a specific challenge for him to become the man that God had called him to be. In 1st Samuel chapter 17, we read one of the greatest stories ever told. It's a story that will be talked about until Jesus returns. 00:05:59.400 --> 00:06:15.675 It's the story of David and Goliath. In 1st Samuel 17:4,1011, listen to these words. A giant nearly 10 feet tall stepped out from the Philistine line. You know what that means? Shaquille O'Neal says, hello. 00:06:16.890 --> 00:06:41.110 This guy's a big guy. From the Philistine line into the open, he walked into the open field, and his name was Goliath from Gath. And listen to this, men, who think life should be easy, who've decided to pursue a life of pleasure, comfort, and ease. You're ruining yourself. Listen to what Goliath says, and this is what you need to hear today. 00:06:41.170 --> 00:06:57.840 Goliath says, I challenge the troops of Israel this day. Give me a man. Give me a man. Let us fight it out together. When Saul and his troops King Saul was the king of Israel at that time, David was not. 00:06:57.840 --> 00:07:13.800 When they heard the Philistines' challenge, they were terrified. And listen to this. They lost all hope. You got an army full of wusses. What are we gonna do if we ever have to go to to to a real fight, ladies? 00:07:14.100 --> 00:07:21.575 We're gonna send lieutenant Latte? You know? I can't fight today. There's ragweed in the field. You know what I'm saying? 00:07:21.575 --> 00:07:37.155 What are We need passing out Zyrtec to all of our soldiers. What are we gonna do? We've got to learn to tell men, you gotta step up. You gotta step up. Goliath is challenging you. 00:07:37.155 --> 00:07:52.195 He's saying, show me you're a man. Is there a man among us? Who will step up? Who will step up? In 1 Samuel 17/26, there's a young boy who hears these taunts, who hears these chants. 00:07:53.055 --> 00:08:08.150 And David asked the soldiers standing nearby, what will the man get for killing this Philistine and ending his defiance of Israel? He says, who is this pagan Philistine anyway? Now let me translate this for you. A lot of people say, sandals doesn't go deep. We're gonna go deep. 00:08:08.625 --> 00:08:17.730 I'm gonna give it to you in the Hebrew. He says, who is this uncircumcised Philistine? His potty talk. Yeah. He's talking about his penis. 00:08:19.710 --> 00:08:35.900 Who is this uncircumcised Philistine? Who is he that he is allowed to defy the armies of the living God? I know, guys, life is hard. I know life is difficult. I know the economy's tough. 00:08:35.900 --> 00:08:54.890 I know inflation's crazy, but men, some of you need to lose a job so that you're ready for your real job. Some of you guys, you didn't get the job because you're not ready for the job. Anybody ever applied and not gotten it? As your pastor, I've interviewed for 2 jobs, didn't get either of them. Be yourself, they said. 00:08:54.890 --> 00:09:07.835 Works for everybody but me. My wife's like, be a little bit less of yourself. Be a little bit less. Guys, I get it. Women are scary. 00:09:09.335 --> 00:09:32.130 Women are scary. But men, you may need to be rejected by a woman so that you're ready for the woman that God has for you. Look, I get kids are difficult. I was in the grocery store, and I don't know what went wrong in this man's life, but his wife sent him with the kids to the grocery store. I just completely forgot what I was shopping for. 00:09:32.130 --> 00:09:54.510 I just wanted to watch. I was, like, this is, like, live action. It was like a police chase, I couldn't take my eyes off of it. But listen to me, difficult children will make you a better father. David needed a giant to become the man that God made him to be, so stop running from your giant. 00:09:55.530 --> 00:10:06.575 Stand and face him. You know what? He's not going away. He will never stop mocking you until he is defeated. You see, here's the thing about giants. 00:10:07.550 --> 00:10:19.875 They only get louder and bigger until you kill them. And we lie, right? Time heals all wounds. No. Time makes Goliath grow. 00:10:19.875 --> 00:10:42.610 Deal with your issues. First Samuel 1716, for 40 days, listen to these words, every morning and every evening, the Philistine champion strutted in front of the armies of Israel. Your giant will strut. If you're in addiction, do you think it's just gonna go away? No. 00:10:42.610 --> 00:10:48.930 No. No. That giant is gonna challenge you every morning and every evening. You can't quit. Who do you think you are? 00:10:48.930 --> 00:11:11.355 You're an addict. If it's an emotion, every morning, every evening. If it's a relationship, every morning, every evening. If it's fear, if it's anxiety, every morning, every evening. And our society's solution for everything's a pill. 00:11:12.615 --> 00:11:24.440 God's solution is kill the giant. Kill the giant. For some of us, it's insecurity. Oh, man. Social media feeds that. 00:11:25.365 --> 00:11:32.585 I mean, you scroll long enough, you're gonna find somebody you're skinnier, prettier, and happier. You know? Hate her. Hate her. Hate her. 00:11:36.420 --> 00:11:59.510 Stop scrolling and kill your giant. He will mock you every morning and every evening. You see, god created you to handle difficult things. We've bought into this idea that life is supposed to be easy, that everybody's supposed to be fat, happy, and wonderful. You see, God loves you too much. 00:11:59.510 --> 00:12:17.840 Here's one of the things I think we even misunderstand about the Bible. In Genesis 1, we think that Adam and Eve experienced no stress, that there was nothing dangerous in the garden. Read Genesis 1. And, oh, by the way, where did the snake come from? I don't know. 00:12:17.840 --> 00:12:37.615 And why did it talk? There was creepy stuff. There was dangerous stuff. Even before the fall, God didn't put you in a safe room even when he made you. You see, oftentimes for things to be beautiful, they have to be dangerous. 00:12:39.275 --> 00:13:04.730 If you're gonna enjoy the view, you gotta watch out for the cliff. Some of you just process that on the way home. Do you know what every man in this room can do? Every man watching online, every man in our campuses across all 14 camps, do you know what every single man can do regardless of his age, regardless of his height, his intelligence, or his level of faith? Every single man in this church, you know what you can do? 00:13:04.790 --> 00:13:14.215 More than you're doing. Genesis 3 23. Adam and Eve sinned. They're kicked out of the garden. Adam's fallen. 00:13:14.215 --> 00:13:20.880 Adam's failed. Adam messed up, and that's where some of you guys are. I can never do anything. I'm a total failure. I'm no good. 00:13:20.880 --> 00:13:44.635 Read Genesis 3 23. He kicks Adam out of the garden, and he places a mighty angel with a flaming sword swinging back and forth. Why would he do that, guys? Because Adam has more strength than he knows. God had to put a mighty angel with a flaming sword to keep Adam out even though he was fallen and sinful and broken. 00:13:45.655 --> 00:13:58.720 Even a broken Adam is still a man of God. Guys, stop listening to your enemy. Stop listening to your giant. Stop listening to Goliath and listen to God. That's what David says. 00:13:58.720 --> 00:14:11.040 Who is this man that defies the armies of the living God? You know what every giant is compared to God? Not a giant. Not a giant. What do you do when you see a really big ant? 00:14:11.040 --> 00:14:31.830 Oh, you're really big, and now you're really dead. James 112. Listen to this. This is the half brother of Jesus. Anyone who meets testing, a testing challenge head on, and manages to stick it out is mighty fortunate. 00:14:32.610 --> 00:14:54.455 For such person's loyalty in love with God for such person's loyalty in love with God, and the reward is life, listen to me, and more life. Wow. You wanna know why Sandals Church is successful? You wanna know why Sandals Church is a megachurch? You wanna know why Sandals Church has baptized 15,000 people over 27 years? 00:14:54.515 --> 00:15:07.770 Because on the days when I wanted to quit and give up, I didn't. That's all. That's all. Stop listening to your critics outgrow them. Outgrow them. 00:15:08.870 --> 00:15:31.385 Some of you gotta figure out not all family members want you to succeed. Because if you'd stop failing, what will they talk about at Christmas? If you got sober, they might actually have to deal with their problems. Men, David faced his giant and won the day. Oh, man. 00:15:31.385 --> 00:15:49.335 One of my favorite Bible verses is David walks out on the battlefield. And for those of you who don't know the story, the king tried to put his armor on him and listen to me, guys, it didn't fit. What is the moral? You don't have to wear somebody else's armor. God's already giving you everything you need. 00:15:49.795 --> 00:16:03.150 Stop trying to be somebody else. Stop trying to be somebody else's hero hero. Try to stop trying to be somebody else's, a man. Stop trying to wear somebody else's armor. Just trust in the Lord your God and that he's given you the gifts. 00:16:04.555 --> 00:16:15.460 Men, you don't need another man. God put you in your home. You are your children's father. You don't need somebody else's armor. You need to stand up and realize who you are. 00:16:15.460 --> 00:16:30.545 So what did David do? He grabbed a sling and 5 smooth stones. He already had all the gifts he needed to defeat his giant and so do you. And what does Goliath say? Am I a dog? 00:16:31.670 --> 00:16:44.485 Am I a dog that you send this boy? That's what your giant says. You're a little boy. You'll never be a real man. And some of you men today, that's what the enemy whispers in your ear every day. 00:16:44.485 --> 00:16:56.405 You're an imposter. Even to this day, when a young man will call me sir, it just kinda rattles me. It's like, woah. You know? Oh, me? 00:16:56.405 --> 00:17:00.745 Me? Yeah. Me. Yeah. Because we don't feel like it, do we? 00:17:02.760 --> 00:17:14.265 Am I a dog that you send this little boy at me? I love the line. Read it in your Bibles. And David ran at him. I I would have loved to have seen Goliath's face. 00:17:14.265 --> 00:17:36.075 Am I atop woah. Woah. And David ran at him and sunk that stone into the center of his skull, and the Goliath fell that day. And listen to me, guys. One man stood up and defeated one man stood up and defeated Goliath, and guess what happened to all the other men in the army that day? 00:17:36.940 --> 00:17:57.540 They celebrated, they cheered, and they chased the armies of the Philistines. What would happen if we just had one guy that would step up? Just one guy, one dad, one husband, one man. You see, David defeated his Goliath. We're Christians. 00:17:58.080 --> 00:18:20.605 Do you know that Jesus faced his Goliath and he won you eternal life? 2nd Timothy 42, so proclaim this message with intensity. Over COVID, we've had some people come from other churches, and I hear this all the time. People that have come from other churches, they're always kinda wowed that I bring my intensity every week. You know, they're always just a little tripped out, like, wow, you never mail one in. 00:18:20.605 --> 00:18:35.175 No, I don't mail it in. And here's why. Because sometimes people come to church once in their life, and I got one stone, one shot to sling and kill that giant. So what does Timothy say? So proclaim the message. 00:18:35.175 --> 00:18:45.590 What's the message? The gospel. With intensity, keep on your watch. Listen to this word. Challenge, warn, urge your people, don't ever quit. 00:18:46.450 --> 00:18:53.335 Don't ever quit. Some of you guys, you're on your last legs of your marriage. You know when you can get divorced? Tomorrow. Today, stay married. 00:18:54.355 --> 00:19:06.810 Stay married. The most beautiful thing about the 12 step program are these words, one day at a time. You don't have to worry about next week. You don't have to worry about next month. You don't get divorced today. 00:19:06.810 --> 00:19:26.360 Men, you don't leave today. You stay in there, you hang in there, and you be the man that God's called you to be. Number 2, godly men need other godly men in their lives. Proverbs 18:1, whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire. Guys, ladies are dangerous when they get together. 00:19:28.580 --> 00:19:43.890 Men, we're dangerous when we're by ourselves. What happens when you're isolated, guys? You break out against all sound judgment. And some of you guys have friends, but they're idiots. How do you know if your friends are idiots? 00:19:43.950 --> 00:19:58.340 Ask your wife. Ask your wife. Are my friends dumb? 1st Corinthians 1533, do not be misled. Bad company corrupts good character. 00:19:59.760 --> 00:20:17.050 It just does. Come back to your senses as you ought and stop sinning. Guys, if all your friends aren't Christian, guess what you'll be one day? Not Christian. Well, Christians are lame. 00:20:17.110 --> 00:20:27.785 No. You know what Christians do? They don't let you get away with your crap. The reason you don't like Christian men in your life, the reason you don't want me in your life is because I'll challenge you. I'll challenge you. 00:20:29.310 --> 00:20:41.435 I don't put up with that stuff. One time my wife and I were on vacations with some friends. It was 8:30 in the morning, we were driving down the highway, the dude's weaving. The dude's weaving. Everybody in the car is uncomfortable. 00:20:41.435 --> 00:20:46.980 We're in a minivan. Everybody's worried. Nobody says anything. You know what I told myself, guys? You know what I told myself? 00:20:47.060 --> 00:21:01.205 What would I expect my kids to do? So I said, pull over. Pull over. My friend had been drinking vodka and his orange juice at 8:30 in the morning. And I said, one of 2 things is gonna happen. 00:21:01.585 --> 00:21:22.815 You're gonna let me drive for the rest of the week even though you rented the car, or number 2, I'm gonna drive this thing and my wife and I are gonna rent our own car, and we're driving. And I had a bunch of non Christians with us, and they were all like, thank you. Thank you. But none of them confronted them and we all could have died. You see, a Christian man will call you out. 00:21:23.400 --> 00:21:35.935 What are you doing? What are you doing? Next, you need to know this, a godly man will make you better. I sat down with that same guy whom I love. I said, I think you're an alcoholic. 00:21:37.675 --> 00:21:43.090 Does anybody like hearing that? No. You think he liked hearing it? No. You know what it was? 00:21:43.090 --> 00:21:57.410 The truth. Iron sharpens iron, men, and one man sharpens another. You know, after I took him to breakfast, you know what his wife said to me? Thank you. Thank you. 00:21:58.210 --> 00:22:23.205 Because she felt like she couldn't say it. Guys, you need to hear some hard things from men you love, from men you respect, and men who love and respect Jesus. Next, a godly man makes you safer. 2 are better than 1, Ecclesiastes 49 says. Because they have a good return for their labor. 00:22:23.985 --> 00:22:51.435 For if either of them fails, listen to this, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. That's where some of you guys are. You don't have a man in your life that you can talk to, that you can speak to. And let me tell you something, I love my wife, and I don't wanna keep any secrets from her, and I don't ever wanna lie to her, but there are some things she doesn't need to hear. 00:22:53.995 --> 00:23:07.925 There are some things I need to say to another godly man. And let me just say, ladies, there's some things she needs to say I don't wanna hear. Shocker. Shocker. Go share that with your lady friends. 00:23:07.925 --> 00:23:24.450 Sister, go talk. Go talk amongst yourselves. It's okay. It's okay because there are some things, ladies, that only a woman understands about you and, guys, there's some things that only a man understands about you. God made us different and I know the university is like, what? 00:23:25.855 --> 00:23:32.480 But it's true. It's true. Alright. We're ready to go varsity? Okay. 00:23:32.560 --> 00:23:48.635 That was just a warm up. We were just warming up. This is Sandals Church, not your grandma's church. And one of the things that makes us special, the secret sauce of sandals is being real. So we're gonna get real, and guys, I'm gonna challenge you. 00:23:50.330 --> 00:24:12.770 And couples that are living together, I'm gonna challenge you. Number 3, godly men need real commitment when it comes to sex. Not a little commitment, real commitment. And let me say this for every single couple in this church that is living together, you are not committed, you are auditioning. You are auditioning. 00:24:13.150 --> 00:24:26.160 Because you know what Tammy and I are if we have a bad day? Still married. Still married. Still married. And there's a lot of questions about sex nowadays. 00:24:26.160 --> 00:24:55.865 On the debrief, one of the number one issues we get asked about is sex, because everybody's on TikTok and nobody's listening to the scriptures. But I want you to know 2000 years ago, people had questions about sex too, and they actually asked questions. And some of you don't know this, but 1st Corinthians is actually a letter of response to many of their questions. And one of the questions was asked was, what about sex? In 1st Corinthians chapter 7 verses 1 through 2, listen to what the Bible says. 00:24:55.865 --> 00:25:10.745 Now regarding the questions you asked in your letter You asked in your letter. What did they ask about? Sex. Listen to what Paul says. Yes, it is good to abstain from sexual relations. 00:25:11.765 --> 00:25:21.930 What? It's good. Like in our world, there's something wrong with you if you aren't all about sex. Paul says, there's nothing wrong with that. That's actually a good thing. 00:25:21.930 --> 00:25:28.865 You know who didn't have sex ever? Jesus. I don't care what you watch on Netflix. It's not true. It's not true. 00:25:29.085 --> 00:25:45.575 Jesus was single his whole life, because he didn't come here to have sex and get married. He came here for you. He came here for me. But listen to what he says, but because there is so much sexual immorality, Corinth was like, Vegas meets San Francisco meets meets Hollywood. It was a mess. 00:25:46.515 --> 00:26:03.535 But because there is so much sexual immorality, listen to me, each man should have his own wife. Ladies, notice he didn't say, Ladies, you gotta get married. He said, Dudes, you gotta get married. Why? Because there's so much sexual immorality, and if you can't control yourself, you need to get married. 00:26:03.995 --> 00:26:18.935 Stop making excuses, And each woman should have her own husband. That's what he says. Marriage is a good thing. Let me say this, men, a godly man does not have to be married. We have to make room for single people in our church. 00:26:20.950 --> 00:26:34.795 I mean, there are Baptist churches that have a problem with Jesus. Why isn't he married? Why won't he step up? It's not his purpose. Single people aren't weird, they just have a different mission. 00:26:35.095 --> 00:26:51.715 They have different calling and we need to celebrate that as as married couples and invite them into our lives. You know what's never a third wheel? A family member. Ever. Include them in your life because they're a part of the family of God. 00:26:53.615 --> 00:27:12.575 So a godly man doesn't have to be married, but a godly man must be married to have sex. You don't need to pray about that. You don't need to Google that, that's what the Bible says, over and over and over again. Marriage is where a godly man exclusively directs his sexual energy. That's where we focus it. 00:27:13.370 --> 00:27:28.415 That's where we encourage it. That's where we live it out. Nowhere else, not on porn, not with someone else, with our wives. First Corinthians 73 through 4. The husband should fulfill his wife's sexual needs. 00:27:28.795 --> 00:27:49.430 Now some are like, well, what about the wives? Hold on, we'll get there. 2000 years ago, a lot of men, especially pagan men, only had sex with their wives for procreation. When it came to pleasure and entertainment, they had sex with their slaves, and they had sex with prostitutes, and they had sex with parties. The apostle Paul says, no no no no. 00:27:49.510 --> 00:28:21.465 That is not God's design. That is not God's design. God's design is that sexual intimacy would occur between a man and a wife. Guys, your job is to focus your sexual attention on your wife. And ladies, this might be a verse to memorize, the wife should fulfill her husband's needs. 00:28:22.560 --> 00:28:37.995 Now I get it, we're different. We're different. And guys always complain, I don't understand God why he made my wife's sex drive so much lower than mine. Guys, if he made her sex drives like yours, you'd never get anything done. The house had burned down. 00:28:37.995 --> 00:28:50.705 The kids would be dead. You'd both be unemployed. I mean, can you imagine? I mean, children running in the streets. Who are those? 00:28:50.705 --> 00:29:00.530 We don't know. No one knows. I mean, some of you guys, like, you don't do a good job at your life. You're criticizing God. I don't know what you were thinking. 00:29:00.750 --> 00:29:15.080 God's like, I don't know what you're thinking. Listen to this. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and you're like, dad's sexist. Hold on. And the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. 00:29:16.900 --> 00:29:30.610 This is important. Now listen to me, guys. There's been a lot of abuse in the church. There's been a lot of misogyny. There's been men have not treated historically women well because they misunderstand God's word. 00:29:30.670 --> 00:29:43.510 A godly man never, never demands sex ever. Look, if you're not having sex, what that's saying is something else is wrong. Something else is wrong in the marriage. You don't have a sex problem, you have a marriage problem. So let's talk about what's wrong in the marriage. 00:29:43.830 --> 00:30:07.740 Let's figure that out and talk about it. And by the way, that's why you're married, because you get to talk about hard things and nobody bails. Nobody bails. Here's how I'm feeling, here's what's going on. And sometimes as we age, we have to talk about physical differences that happen, we have to talk about erectile dysfunction, we have to talk about aging, we have to talk about low libido, we have to talk about those things. 00:30:08.440 --> 00:30:29.035 That's what marriage is for, where we talk about the most vulnerable, uncomfortable, bizarre things, and we still love each other. Single people, when you get married you poop in the same room. It's rough. It's rough. Unless you're rich, and then you have your own places that you go to. 00:30:33.050 --> 00:30:40.515 I had this rich friend. He's got, like, 9 bathrooms. I'm like, I hate you. I hate you. K. 00:30:40.515 --> 00:30:56.760 So in marriage in marriage you have to talk about uncomfortable things. You have to talk about hard things. That's actually called intimacy. Intimacy. First Corinthians 13:4, love does not demand its own way. 00:30:57.995 --> 00:31:33.045 Ladies, any guy that says if you love me then you'd have sex with me, he doesn't know what love is and he doesn't know who God is. So what is sex? Sex is a thing to be expressed between a husband and a wife and, listen to me, if you wanna be a godly man, look, you get to decide what man you wanna be, but if you wanna be a godly man, a godly man has sex within a marriage, listen to me, where it is mutually agreed upon and here it is and enjoyed. That's what it's about. It's for you as a couple. 00:31:33.560 --> 00:31:50.840 And if you're single, it's something that you need to look forward to. It's not something that you need to be doing right now if you're not married. And if you are not married and you love this person, why aren't you getting married? And I hear it all the time. I hear it all the time. 00:31:51.300 --> 00:32:00.315 Well, it costs too much money. Well, we did something 5 years ago, 5 years ago where I just said, you know what? I'm tired of hearing this. How much marriage cost? How much marriage cost? 00:32:00.315 --> 00:32:15.925 What the church did is we said, if you love each other and you'll go through our pre counseling discipleship, we will marry you for free at the church. We had 50 couples come together on one day in a mass wedding. It was awesome. We hired a DJ. It was incredible. 00:32:16.065 --> 00:32:25.690 Everybody had a cake. It was awesome. I was dancing with grandmas. It was great. So listen to me. 00:32:25.690 --> 00:32:45.630 We're gonna do it again in September, amen? We're gonna do it again. If you are sleeping with somebody and you love them and this is the person that you wanna marry, stop sinning and let's do it the right way. Let's do it God's way. Sign up today at your local church and say, hey. 00:32:45.630 --> 00:33:12.725 We wanna go through premarital counseling. We have amazing marriage coaches that will come alongside you and help you figure this out, and we will celebrate together at a date that's to be announced once we figure this out because my whole staff just heard about this. And we'll do it at church again. And let me tell you something, it's the 5 year anniversary of that and I've had so many couples that have come up to me. They're still married and they said, thank you so much. 00:33:13.025 --> 00:33:20.350 Thank you so much for challenging us. It changed our life. It changed our relationship. Because you know what changes a relationship? When you're all in. 00:33:20.890 --> 00:33:34.730 When before God, your family, and your friends, you say I'm all in. So let me encourage you, sign up today after service. Just go on the back and just say, look, I we we we're living together. Our vision is being real. K. 00:33:34.730 --> 00:33:51.340 We know I'm not preaching to saints. Nobody's confused here, and just say, look, we need to get this right, but I can't help you if you're not getting real if you're not able to get real. And if you won't get real, you're not gonna heal. So let's do this together. And, for those of you who got married 5 years ago, volunteer, help out. 00:33:51.480 --> 00:33:55.900 Help us do this. Help us prepare it. Change your life. Let's change some other lives. Amen? 00:33:55.960 --> 00:34:06.875 It's gonna be awesome. Alright. No No more special announcements. 1st Corinthians chapter 7 verse 5, do not deprive each other of sexual relations. And I know a lot of you think God's anti sex. 00:34:06.875 --> 00:34:08.940 No. No. I don't know if you know this. This. It was his idea. 00:34:08.940 --> 00:34:13.280 He invented it. Adam and Eve weren't, like, in the garden. Adam didn't trip and fall. And what? What was that? 00:34:13.580 --> 00:34:26.640 What was that? What was that? Seriously, Genesis chapter 4. You know what Eve says, ladies? Eve says, with the Lord's help, I have created a child. 00:34:26.640 --> 00:34:35.245 Because Adam didn't know what to do. God's like, come here. Come here. Come here. Trust me, you're gonna like this. 00:34:35.245 --> 00:34:44.350 Here we go. K. Is it okay to not have sex in marriage? Yes. Listen to me. 00:34:44.350 --> 00:34:57.195 Unless you both agree. To refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time. Now, look, life changes, age happens. If you're a 105 years old and you're both good, okay. You know what? 00:34:57.195 --> 00:35:14.805 I support that. You guys did it enough. Good for you guys. But you can only do that if you both agree. If one of you that's a 105 is still feeling spunky, right, put on a little raw bass, easy rock, it takes 2 to make a thing go right. 00:35:14.805 --> 00:35:25.430 You know what I'm saying? That's all I'm saying. I love that song. Sorry. Raw Base is the great love creator, man. 00:35:25.430 --> 00:35:48.235 That that song is that that song is awesome. Listen to this. Take a break for a time so that you can give yourselves more completely completely to prayer. So guys, when you go home from church today just say, to your wife, do you feel like praying all afternoon? If not, I think we should put on raw basin, easy rock. 00:35:50.860 --> 00:36:07.410 And afterward, you should come together, listen to this, so that Satan won't be able to tempt you. You know who knows your weakness? Satan. He knows you're Goliath because of your lack of self control. Alright. 00:36:08.190 --> 00:36:21.455 Number 4. Godly men live as champions for Jesus. Man, I'm not here to beat you down, guys. I'm here to lift you up. You have no idea who you are. 00:36:21.455 --> 00:36:31.760 You know who David didn't know who he was? He didn't know he was gonna be king. He thought he was a poor shepherd boy. He was the last in the line of his father's children. He was the least important son in his family. 00:36:31.760 --> 00:36:38.405 When he came to the battlefield, his brothers didn't welcome him. They mocked him. They mocked him. They mocked him. They mocked him. 00:36:38.405 --> 00:36:53.805 They wanted to send him away. They thought he was a joke, but God thought he was the king who would love God with all of his heart. And by the way, do you know whose throne Jesus sits on? The throne of David. Think about that. 00:36:53.805 --> 00:37:15.495 The Lord Jesus sits on the throne of David that was promised to him. You have no idea who you are, guys. You have no idea what you can do. As soon as David returned from killing Goliath, Abner brought him to Saul. David was brought before the king and he's a little shepherd boy and I love this verse. 00:37:16.380 --> 00:37:39.370 He comes to the king and he's got something in his hand, the Philistine's head. He goes to his first meeting with the king and he's got Goliath's acne puffed up, disgusting, 3 eyeballed head. Now, it doesn't say he has 3 eyeballs. That's just me. But I'm guessing if you're 10 feet tall, your face doesn't look good. 00:37:40.515 --> 00:37:55.930 And David's got his head in his hand. Some of you never read your bible. It's like, oh my gosh. What did David do with the head? Well, the Bible tells us in 1st Samuel 1754, David took the Philistine's head to Jerusalem. 00:37:56.950 --> 00:38:15.000 Why would he do that? Because there's something special about where that head is buried. Remember the name Goliath? Mark 1522. When Jesus was crucified, where was He crucified? 00:38:15.245 --> 00:38:54.345 He was crucified in a place called, listen to the words, Golgotha, which means, listen to me, the place of the skull. There are a lot of scholars, and I agree with him, that Golgotha means the place of Goliath's head. You see David had to kill the enemy of Israel and Jesus killed your enemy for you. And he did it on the place where David placed the head, where he would be victorious. You see, Jesus was a champion for you, listen to me, guys, so you could become a champion for him. 00:38:54.345 --> 00:38:59.920 Yes. Praise God. That's who he is. That's what it is. That's what it means to god to be a godly man. 00:38:59.920 --> 00:39:10.855 You are not a slave to sin, but you are victorious of sin. You don't have a Goliath. You got a dead Goliath. Hebrews 12:1 and 2, that's one of my favorite verses, guys. Listen to this. 00:39:10.855 --> 00:39:40.695 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses, When you read Hebrews 11, you know what they are? Champions. Every single one of them who fought the fight and slayed their Goliath. Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. I love this verse. 00:39:41.655 --> 00:40:07.715 And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. How do we do this, men? We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus. Listen to this, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Man, I quit watching sports because I can't take it. 00:40:09.300 --> 00:40:26.400 I think being a fan is the most miserable thing on earth to be. I mean, you don't get paid. You pay to be miserable. Right? But do you know how differently I would be as a fan if I knew my team always won? 00:40:28.300 --> 00:40:48.340 If I knew no matter the score, no matter the quarter, no matter how many points we are down, if I knew the outcome was we were world champions every time, I would be a little different. Here's the thing. When it comes to eternity, we worship Jesus. We win every time. We win. 00:40:48.340 --> 00:40:57.145 Satan loses every time. Guys, live like champions. Why? You already won. You already won. 00:40:58.245 --> 00:41:13.355 So guys, get in a group. Guys, if you're sleeping with a gal and she's your your future wife, marry her. Make it right. Step up and be a godly man and start off by saying, I'm sorry. I've not treated you like you should be treated. 00:41:13.415 --> 00:41:39.030 I've not honored you the way you should be honored. And step up and marry her. Guys, let's have a church full of godly men who see Goliath on the battlefield and meet him and meet him. Let's pray together. Heavenly father, we pray in the name of Jesus that we would have a church full of godly men. 00:41:40.290 --> 00:41:52.620 God, our Goliath is waiting for us in the parking lot. He's waiting for us at home. He's waiting for us at work. He's waiting for us in the morning and the evening. He will never go away until we kill him. 00:41:52.620 --> 00:42:04.065 Lord Jesus, with your power, with your strength, help us this week to slay our Goliath. Lord, we pray this in Jesus' name. Amen.