1 00:00:00,183 --> 00:00:01,983 I've had this poster board up in my room 2 00:00:01,983 --> 00:00:04,233 my whole five years at 3 00:00:04,233 --> 00:00:06,200 at at um Miami yeah 4 00:00:06,433 --> 00:00:08,833 the guys would come in my room and say man what's 5 00:00:08,833 --> 00:00:12,183 is that your dad nobody thought that was a coach right 6 00:00:12,183 --> 00:00:12,700 yeah they didn't 7 00:00:12,700 --> 00:00:13,500 they knew yeah 8 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,183 they had never known him yeah 9 00:00:15,183 --> 00:00:15,950 yeah they had never known him 10 00:00:15,950 --> 00:00:16,666 yeah like 11 00:00:16,666 --> 00:00:17,666 and they asked you who's your dad 12 00:00:17,666 --> 00:00:18,466 no I said no 13 00:00:18,500 --> 00:00:20,783 I said that's my coach yeah 14 00:00:20,783 --> 00:00:21,833 because they knew it was at Miami 15 00:00:21,833 --> 00:00:23,183 they could see that this is the locker room 16 00:00:23,183 --> 00:00:24,633 like other guys are gonna like that 17 00:00:24,633 --> 00:00:25,500 I said no 18 00:00:25,500 --> 00:00:26,583 that's my coach yeah 19 00:00:26,583 --> 00:00:28,833 so I heard that forever you know 20 00:00:28,833 --> 00:00:29,383 but you know 21 00:00:29,383 --> 00:00:30,700 and then so those 22 00:00:30,700 --> 00:00:32,666 those my initial flashback like wow 23 00:00:32,666 --> 00:00:33,800 make sense yeah 24 00:00:40,550 --> 00:00:42,933 welcome back to raising men 25 00:00:42,950 --> 00:00:43,850 Dylan Mccall 26 00:00:44,233 --> 00:00:48,150 is the running back coach for the Las Vegas Raiders 27 00:00:48,150 --> 00:00:50,666 and he's the co author of a book called 28 00:00:50,666 --> 00:00:53,883 runs in the family with Sarah Spain 29 00:00:54,383 --> 00:00:58,600 his story touches on a lot of the themes 30 00:00:58,666 --> 00:01:00,750 that we talk about on Raising Men 31 00:01:00,750 --> 00:01:03,783 and I'm honored to have him on the show 32 00:01:03,783 --> 00:01:06,483 Dylan welcome to raising men 33 00:01:06,866 --> 00:01:08,033 I'm honored to be on here 34 00:01:08,033 --> 00:01:09,550 this is this is right up my alley 35 00:01:09,550 --> 00:01:12,333 let's do it it is absolutely a pleasure 36 00:01:12,383 --> 00:01:14,983 let's just begin at the beginning 37 00:01:14,983 --> 00:01:16,183 you uh 38 00:01:16,183 --> 00:01:18,100 were a young baby uh 39 00:01:18,100 --> 00:01:22,500 you were given up for adoption and into an absolute 40 00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:25,700 just delightful loving family in Youngstown Ohio 41 00:01:25,700 --> 00:01:28,600 tell us about how that went and uh 42 00:01:28,833 --> 00:01:29,466 and and what 43 00:01:29,466 --> 00:01:31,850 and how that shaped your early years 44 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:33,100 yeah I mean 45 00:01:33,100 --> 00:01:34,633 you know you know 46 00:01:34,633 --> 00:01:37,433 I was adopted I didn't know I was adopted till I was 47 00:01:37,433 --> 00:01:38,866 you know I don't know six 48 00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:40,550 7 years old yeah 49 00:01:40,550 --> 00:01:42,266 people didn't talk about it back then right 50 00:01:42,266 --> 00:01:44,850 it was just a badge of shame or something 51 00:01:45,033 --> 00:01:45,866 you know and and 52 00:01:45,866 --> 00:01:46,900 and you know 53 00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:48,583 you didn't know a lot of people who were adopted 54 00:01:48,583 --> 00:01:49,983 but I mean I grew up 55 00:01:49,983 --> 00:01:50,833 you know in the 56 00:01:50,833 --> 00:01:52,200 in the um 57 00:01:52,550 --> 00:01:54,983 definitely had a great structure overall 58 00:01:54,983 --> 00:01:56,550 you know my mom and 59 00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:57,800 you know my brother 60 00:01:58,100 --> 00:01:59,350 um my adopted dad 61 00:01:59,350 --> 00:02:00,266 you know I mean yeah 62 00:02:00,266 --> 00:02:02,766 it started off as a loving 63 00:02:02,983 --> 00:02:04,633 strong circumstance my dad 64 00:02:04,633 --> 00:02:06,900 when I was 2 or 3 he left yeah 65 00:02:06,900 --> 00:02:07,550 um so 66 00:02:07,550 --> 00:02:09,183 you know it was a single family 67 00:02:09,183 --> 00:02:11,250 single parent family my mom 68 00:02:11,500 --> 00:02:15,583 um she did a phenomenal job under the circumstances 69 00:02:15,583 --> 00:02:16,733 you know um 70 00:02:16,750 --> 00:02:18,483 of raising me and my brother 71 00:02:18,633 --> 00:02:20,166 you know along the way 72 00:02:20,266 --> 00:02:21,733 you know she wanted to 73 00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:23,633 you know for us to have a 74 00:02:23,633 --> 00:02:24,233 a a 75 00:02:24,233 --> 00:02:26,200 a father on hand so 76 00:02:26,350 --> 00:02:27,383 you know along the way 77 00:02:27,383 --> 00:02:28,400 you know she 78 00:02:28,833 --> 00:02:30,250 you know she remarried 79 00:02:30,466 --> 00:02:33,650 um that wasn't a good example right there father 80 00:02:33,700 --> 00:02:35,666 fatherhood to me um 81 00:02:35,666 --> 00:02:37,750 she went on to have another relationship that would 82 00:02:37,750 --> 00:02:40,400 that really gave me a blueprint for what I didn't want 83 00:02:40,466 --> 00:02:41,583 and you don't hold that you know 84 00:02:41,583 --> 00:02:42,583 and just to give a disclaimer 85 00:02:42,583 --> 00:02:44,033 I definitely don't hold that against her 86 00:02:44,033 --> 00:02:46,400 because her thoughts in her 87 00:02:46,583 --> 00:02:48,633 you know what she wanted to do was all genuine 88 00:02:48,633 --> 00:02:51,250 she wanted a father figure there for us and 89 00:02:51,266 --> 00:02:53,583 and sometimes she was trying to be a miracle worker 90 00:02:53,583 --> 00:02:55,166 with some of the guys that she chose 91 00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:57,033 but that was noble because she's like look 92 00:02:57,033 --> 00:02:58,433 I really want this structure 93 00:02:58,433 --> 00:03:00,166 she seen potential in some guys 94 00:03:00,300 --> 00:03:02,433 who just didn't bear out correctly 95 00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:04,866 so that was what it was you know 96 00:03:04,866 --> 00:03:06,166 and at the end of the day 97 00:03:06,300 --> 00:03:08,633 you know as rough as it may have been 98 00:03:08,633 --> 00:03:11,183 it still it still gave me and my brother 99 00:03:11,183 --> 00:03:14,433 a blueprint for what we didn't want 100 00:03:14,433 --> 00:03:15,833 you know what we didn't want 101 00:03:15,833 --> 00:03:17,050 but along the way 102 00:03:17,066 --> 00:03:19,033 had a great family all across the board 103 00:03:19,033 --> 00:03:20,433 my brother was phenomenal 104 00:03:20,433 --> 00:03:21,933 he was four years older than me 105 00:03:21,950 --> 00:03:25,300 um he was a phenomenal figure to me 106 00:03:25,300 --> 00:03:27,966 of what a brother and what a man should be 107 00:03:28,433 --> 00:03:29,550 obviously had great 108 00:03:29,550 --> 00:03:33,233 my uncles and my grandpa and 109 00:03:33,233 --> 00:03:33,783 you know and 110 00:03:33,783 --> 00:03:35,183 and different things you know 111 00:03:35,183 --> 00:03:37,050 and my aunts and uncles man 112 00:03:37,066 --> 00:03:38,683 outside of in the home 113 00:03:38,700 --> 00:03:39,750 you know um 114 00:03:39,750 --> 00:03:41,666 I had some great structures around me 115 00:03:41,666 --> 00:03:46,183 but all those things that I experienced and I seen 116 00:03:46,183 --> 00:03:47,766 unfortunately in my home 117 00:03:47,950 --> 00:03:48,350 you know 118 00:03:48,350 --> 00:03:50,766 in different things like that and some of the adversity 119 00:03:50,783 --> 00:03:53,166 it did make me very reserved 120 00:03:53,550 --> 00:03:56,233 um it made me extremely introverted 121 00:03:56,233 --> 00:03:58,666 it made me very quiet because I didn't 122 00:03:58,666 --> 00:04:01,633 felt like I had the verbal tools or the physical tools 123 00:04:01,633 --> 00:04:03,566 at times to defend my mom 124 00:04:03,833 --> 00:04:04,183 um and 125 00:04:04,183 --> 00:04:06,083 and and really stand up 126 00:04:06,183 --> 00:04:07,066 you know in my house 127 00:04:07,066 --> 00:04:08,550 I just was scared you know 128 00:04:08,550 --> 00:04:10,133 so um 129 00:04:10,783 --> 00:04:13,433 some of those themes I know we'll get to that later on 130 00:04:13,433 --> 00:04:15,200 kind of permeated through 131 00:04:15,383 --> 00:04:17,900 you know I ultimately had to overcome those things 132 00:04:17,900 --> 00:04:20,100 but it took a while it took a while 133 00:04:20,100 --> 00:04:22,450 and especially being someone who was not 134 00:04:22,583 --> 00:04:25,433 I didn't experience therapy for this when like oh 135 00:04:25,433 --> 00:04:27,500 I went through my I talked it out 136 00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:30,883 no I just had to process it out kind of on my own 137 00:04:31,033 --> 00:04:33,000 you know my mom had attempted to 138 00:04:33,100 --> 00:04:34,833 take me to therapy when I was younger 139 00:04:34,833 --> 00:04:37,633 but the structure of it wasn't um 140 00:04:37,633 --> 00:04:40,366 in the way that I really felt comfortable um 141 00:04:40,433 --> 00:04:41,866 expressing myself you know 142 00:04:41,866 --> 00:04:43,533 for various reasons so 143 00:04:43,583 --> 00:04:44,950 you know that was what it was 144 00:04:44,950 --> 00:04:45,750 so um 145 00:04:45,750 --> 00:04:47,866 um as rough as it was 146 00:04:47,866 --> 00:04:49,583 you know I still give that back 147 00:04:49,583 --> 00:04:51,100 I still say that on the forefront 148 00:04:51,100 --> 00:04:53,150 the backdrop was still was very positive 149 00:04:53,150 --> 00:04:55,433 my mom made sure that me and my brother 150 00:04:55,433 --> 00:04:57,233 understood the value of education 151 00:04:57,233 --> 00:04:59,983 and hard work I'm thankful to my mom 152 00:04:59,983 --> 00:05:01,650 you know for that infrastructure 153 00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:03,266 yeah you know 154 00:05:03,266 --> 00:05:07,400 if you look at the statistics about um 155 00:05:08,033 --> 00:05:09,500 the outcomes of boys 156 00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:11,833 who end up growing up without a father in the home 157 00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:14,083 or without a without a man in the home yeah 158 00:05:14,150 --> 00:05:16,066 yeah it's yeah 159 00:05:16,066 --> 00:05:17,366 it's scary yeah 160 00:05:17,550 --> 00:05:19,900 you just would not have placed good 161 00:05:19,900 --> 00:05:21,666 odds on you 162 00:05:21,666 --> 00:05:24,850 having the kind of result that you ended up having 163 00:05:25,150 --> 00:05:28,033 and I get the sense that part of the reason that 164 00:05:28,033 --> 00:05:31,733 that worked out well for you is because of football 165 00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:34,583 and because of sports yeah 166 00:05:34,583 --> 00:05:35,350 so that that was 167 00:05:35,350 --> 00:05:37,550 that was strong for me it gave me a structure 168 00:05:37,550 --> 00:05:38,866 you know um 169 00:05:38,866 --> 00:05:39,866 you know I say a lot that 170 00:05:39,866 --> 00:05:41,466 you know football wasn't just sport 171 00:05:41,466 --> 00:05:42,500 it was a structure for me 172 00:05:42,500 --> 00:05:43,900 it was an outlet yeah 173 00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:47,100 so the fact that I may have been reserved the that 174 00:05:47,100 --> 00:05:49,166 you know quiet and different things like that 175 00:05:49,183 --> 00:05:50,883 football don't care about that 176 00:05:50,883 --> 00:05:52,150 football is about movement 177 00:05:52,150 --> 00:05:53,583 football is about activity 178 00:05:53,583 --> 00:05:56,800 and for me it was an outlet and a way to burn energy 179 00:05:56,900 --> 00:06:00,683 and to kind of just it was a release um 180 00:06:00,900 --> 00:06:01,666 you know so though 181 00:06:01,666 --> 00:06:03,183 you know my mom structured it so 182 00:06:03,183 --> 00:06:04,066 you know I was in football 183 00:06:04,066 --> 00:06:05,866 I was in basketball she did everything she could 184 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,283 she she made sure 185 00:06:07,383 --> 00:06:09,783 you know that those fees and stuff were sometimes paid 186 00:06:09,783 --> 00:06:11,350 even before our light Bill was paid 187 00:06:11,350 --> 00:06:15,466 she's like I want my sons to have these outlets because 188 00:06:15,466 --> 00:06:19,250 you know when you talk about not having a father around 189 00:06:19,300 --> 00:06:21,466 in addition to the environment we was in 190 00:06:21,466 --> 00:06:24,600 in addition to some of the um um 191 00:06:24,950 --> 00:06:26,700 tough environmental things 192 00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:29,466 that could have pulled me in a different direction 193 00:06:29,466 --> 00:06:31,233 and it did sometimes sometime I 194 00:06:31,233 --> 00:06:33,033 I did I'm not gonna sit up and 195 00:06:33,033 --> 00:06:35,800 and and claim perfection cause I'm far from that 196 00:06:35,900 --> 00:06:37,383 you know but you know 197 00:06:37,383 --> 00:06:38,250 I think the 198 00:06:39,183 --> 00:06:41,283 the interesting thing about the environment is 199 00:06:41,300 --> 00:06:44,483 people around me seen more in me than I seen in myself 200 00:06:45,500 --> 00:06:48,350 that was something that I'm eternally grateful for 201 00:06:48,350 --> 00:06:51,333 with some of my friends I grew up with who 202 00:06:52,100 --> 00:06:52,433 you know 203 00:06:52,433 --> 00:06:54,833 their life went in a different direction at that time 204 00:06:54,833 --> 00:06:56,550 some guys end up in jail some guys 205 00:06:56,550 --> 00:06:58,166 I mean I got some friends that deceased 206 00:06:58,183 --> 00:06:59,583 and a lot of different things like that 207 00:06:59,583 --> 00:07:00,933 from decisions they made 208 00:07:01,133 --> 00:07:03,266 but I got the ultimate respect for those guys 209 00:07:03,266 --> 00:07:06,000 cause even when I try to veer over into their lane 210 00:07:06,066 --> 00:07:07,466 and these guys I go to school with 211 00:07:07,466 --> 00:07:09,900 it is what it is they would say nah 212 00:07:09,900 --> 00:07:11,466 we taking you home no 213 00:07:11,466 --> 00:07:13,066 we doing this and doing that and I'm like 214 00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:13,750 whoa hold up 215 00:07:13,750 --> 00:07:16,633 I wanna hang out too I wanna go do nah 216 00:07:16,633 --> 00:07:17,866 we gonna take you home it's like 217 00:07:17,866 --> 00:07:20,833 they seen something in me that I didn't see in myself 218 00:07:20,833 --> 00:07:23,000 at that time cause I could have just as easily 219 00:07:23,550 --> 00:07:24,900 you know I was a willing participant 220 00:07:24,900 --> 00:07:26,633 hey I wanna go hang out and do this 221 00:07:26,633 --> 00:07:27,900 and these were guys who were my age 222 00:07:27,900 --> 00:07:28,900 this one like yeah 223 00:07:28,900 --> 00:07:29,950 you know I was 10 years young 224 00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:32,566 these are my team my classmates teammates yeah 225 00:07:32,566 --> 00:07:33,700 so they said no 226 00:07:33,700 --> 00:07:34,666 you've got something else 227 00:07:34,666 --> 00:07:36,183 you've got something special you need 228 00:07:36,183 --> 00:07:37,500 and I didn't know how I'm 229 00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:39,233 I'm sitting there what you tell me what 230 00:07:39,233 --> 00:07:40,550 what is it I don't know what it is 231 00:07:40,550 --> 00:07:41,900 cause I can't see it at that point 232 00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:43,433 wow they essentially saved you 233 00:07:43,433 --> 00:07:45,233 before they even saved themselves 234 00:07:45,233 --> 00:07:46,500 they weren't willing to save themselves 235 00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:47,583 but they were willing to save you 236 00:07:47,583 --> 00:07:48,700 yes yes 237 00:07:48,700 --> 00:07:50,700 wow that is incredible haha 238 00:07:50,700 --> 00:07:51,300 well all 239 00:07:51,300 --> 00:07:55,250 a lot of that really came into focus um 240 00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:58,733 with the appearance of a uh 241 00:07:58,950 --> 00:08:02,100 a bright red Mercedes Benz at your door 242 00:08:02,100 --> 00:08:04,600 didn't it and so tell us about that a little bit 243 00:08:04,733 --> 00:08:06,383 so just kind of going back laying 244 00:08:06,383 --> 00:08:07,300 laying the the 245 00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:09,583 the story around the whole thing 246 00:08:09,583 --> 00:08:11,033 I mean so here it is 247 00:08:11,033 --> 00:08:11,433 I'm you know 248 00:08:11,433 --> 00:08:12,300 I'm a you know 249 00:08:12,300 --> 00:08:14,400 I'm playing ball I'm okay 250 00:08:14,466 --> 00:08:14,900 I mean you know 251 00:08:14,900 --> 00:08:16,266 I'm probably just a marginal student 252 00:08:16,266 --> 00:08:18,400 I was not a highly motivated student 253 00:08:18,550 --> 00:08:20,700 just because I seen what's going on in my environment 254 00:08:20,700 --> 00:08:22,366 I didn't have a really high 255 00:08:23,350 --> 00:08:24,766 um sense of self 256 00:08:24,833 --> 00:08:26,700 I didn't say I'mma be the this or that 257 00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:28,950 the things that I am I never even forecasted that 258 00:08:28,950 --> 00:08:30,350 I didn't even think that yeah 259 00:08:30,350 --> 00:08:32,150 I'm just kind of based on what was going on 260 00:08:32,150 --> 00:08:33,583 where what I had going on 261 00:08:33,583 --> 00:08:36,000 I wasn't a phenomenal student inately 262 00:08:36,150 --> 00:08:37,533 different things like that 263 00:08:37,700 --> 00:08:38,750 um but I said 264 00:08:38,750 --> 00:08:40,700 what can I control what can I really 265 00:08:40,700 --> 00:08:41,666 really feel to control 266 00:08:41,666 --> 00:08:43,966 I felt like I control how hard I worked 267 00:08:44,266 --> 00:08:46,100 and what I did is I took that 268 00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:47,383 you would it'd be easy to say you should 269 00:08:47,383 --> 00:08:49,666 apply that same thing to the classroom 270 00:08:49,666 --> 00:08:51,233 I applied it to football you know what I'm saying 271 00:08:51,233 --> 00:08:52,700 I'm sitting here being transparent 272 00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:54,183 I applied it to football sure 273 00:08:54,183 --> 00:08:55,983 that came very natural to me and I said 274 00:08:55,983 --> 00:08:57,600 you know what I can tap this out 275 00:08:57,750 --> 00:09:00,150 so in football I was like a very 276 00:09:00,150 --> 00:09:01,950 very hard worker because to my 277 00:09:01,950 --> 00:09:03,150 what I was saying is you know what 278 00:09:03,150 --> 00:09:04,933 amongst my friends and my peers 279 00:09:05,300 --> 00:09:08,183 you know I wanted to be respected for that 280 00:09:08,183 --> 00:09:10,566 that was really big in our community 281 00:09:10,833 --> 00:09:13,066 football was huge in my high school and 282 00:09:13,066 --> 00:09:15,650 and just where I was from in Northeast Ohio was huge 283 00:09:15,866 --> 00:09:18,533 you know and I was the ultimate badge of honor 284 00:09:18,633 --> 00:09:20,100 so when I got in high school 285 00:09:20,100 --> 00:09:20,900 I mean 286 00:09:21,466 --> 00:09:23,433 you know I was small um 287 00:09:23,433 --> 00:09:24,466 I wouldn't that fast 288 00:09:24,466 --> 00:09:27,033 I wouldn't that this I wouldn't that that but I said 289 00:09:27,033 --> 00:09:29,283 you know what how can I make an impression here 290 00:09:29,500 --> 00:09:31,666 and it was like the light bulb went off 291 00:09:31,666 --> 00:09:33,100 probably going into my temporary year 292 00:09:33,100 --> 00:09:34,966 I said I'm just gonna work hard 293 00:09:35,750 --> 00:09:38,383 these guys I may not be whatever these other things 294 00:09:38,383 --> 00:09:40,300 I wasn't thinking about the NFL or anything like that 295 00:09:40,300 --> 00:09:40,900 I said 296 00:09:40,900 --> 00:09:44,300 I want to be respected for what I bring to the table 297 00:09:44,300 --> 00:09:46,500 and if anything it may not be supreme talent 298 00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:48,350 but it'll be you know 299 00:09:48,350 --> 00:09:50,766 enormous work ethic and that's what I did 300 00:09:51,266 --> 00:09:53,766 so over the next couple years 301 00:09:54,066 --> 00:09:56,200 I mean I just was talking about this the other day 302 00:09:56,433 --> 00:09:59,200 that work ethic became contagious 303 00:09:59,233 --> 00:10:01,583 and somewhat legendary on our team 304 00:10:01,583 --> 00:10:03,183 because it was like look at this guy 305 00:10:03,183 --> 00:10:04,033 is that right he get the ball 306 00:10:04,033 --> 00:10:06,150 he running he's doing everything hard 307 00:10:06,150 --> 00:10:08,150 he's on the work on the you know 308 00:10:08,150 --> 00:10:10,650 strength workouts he's doing all these different things 309 00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:13,600 so when my senior year um 310 00:10:14,183 --> 00:10:14,633 you know 311 00:10:14,633 --> 00:10:16,433 there was another guy that was trying to play out 312 00:10:16,433 --> 00:10:17,750 running back which is fine 313 00:10:17,750 --> 00:10:19,350 and I think he had a fumble in the game 314 00:10:19,350 --> 00:10:21,166 it might have been our second or third game 315 00:10:21,233 --> 00:10:23,250 and they put me back in hmm 316 00:10:23,550 --> 00:10:25,266 um and I had a great game 317 00:10:25,266 --> 00:10:28,483 like I'm like 200 yards and then from that point 318 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:29,950 everything was moving forward 319 00:10:29,950 --> 00:10:30,466 so I guess 320 00:10:30,466 --> 00:10:31,633 what I tell a lot of guys is 321 00:10:31,633 --> 00:10:34,683 that hard work unlocked the talent 322 00:10:34,783 --> 00:10:35,633 yeah so 323 00:10:35,633 --> 00:10:36,150 it was like wow 324 00:10:36,150 --> 00:10:37,500 we knew this guy worked hard 325 00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:39,100 but whoa he in the game 326 00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:41,183 look at this guy and so 327 00:10:41,183 --> 00:10:43,266 you were ready that fumble yes 328 00:10:43,266 --> 00:10:44,750 that fumble was your moment 329 00:10:44,750 --> 00:10:46,466 but because you had put in the effort 330 00:10:46,466 --> 00:10:48,183 because you had put in that hard work 331 00:10:48,183 --> 00:10:49,150 because you had focused 332 00:10:49,150 --> 00:10:51,400 and because you had gotten that reputation 333 00:10:51,500 --> 00:10:53,233 you got the chance and you 334 00:10:53,233 --> 00:10:55,150 and you were able to capitalize on it 335 00:10:55,150 --> 00:10:57,000 as opposed to letting it go to waste 336 00:10:57,233 --> 00:10:58,350 yes so 337 00:10:58,350 --> 00:10:59,666 you know all of that that 338 00:10:59,666 --> 00:11:01,700 that that hard work and everything like that 339 00:11:01,700 --> 00:11:04,000 and just kind of how I handle myself on the field 340 00:11:04,183 --> 00:11:07,633 it manifested itself my senior year and here I am 341 00:11:07,633 --> 00:11:09,400 I mean going into my senior year 342 00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:11,950 I was my plan was go to the Navy 343 00:11:11,950 --> 00:11:14,783 I sent off the brochures you know 344 00:11:14,783 --> 00:11:17,550 I had a 2.1 GPA wasn't like hey 345 00:11:17,550 --> 00:11:19,500 I'm going on a athletic scholarship 346 00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:19,983 there's no way 347 00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:21,783 my mom was paying for me to go to school 348 00:11:21,783 --> 00:11:22,500 you know I'm like hey 349 00:11:22,500 --> 00:11:23,900 I'm i'mma go to the Navy 350 00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:25,950 I'mma graduate and just go to the Navy 351 00:11:25,950 --> 00:11:28,483 so that's what my plan was going into my senior year 352 00:11:28,866 --> 00:11:31,800 ultimately had a really really good senior year 353 00:11:31,833 --> 00:11:34,200 which LED to some college opportunities 354 00:11:34,300 --> 00:11:37,550 and that's when the candy apple red Mercedes pulled up 355 00:11:37,550 --> 00:11:39,766 I love it and and so who was in that 356 00:11:40,150 --> 00:11:42,550 so I'm sitting there as I'm in 357 00:11:42,550 --> 00:11:43,966 I'm in English class 358 00:11:44,383 --> 00:11:47,100 and I look down and I see this candy apple 359 00:11:47,100 --> 00:11:48,700 red and gold Mercedes it's stuck 360 00:11:48,700 --> 00:11:50,066 so you can't help look down wow 361 00:11:50,066 --> 00:11:52,350 we looking out the classroom me we on the third floor 362 00:11:52,350 --> 00:11:54,066 we looking down like man we wonder whose car is that 363 00:11:54,066 --> 00:11:55,550 that's a car yeah 364 00:11:55,550 --> 00:11:57,083 like who's that stands out 365 00:11:57,233 --> 00:11:59,166 what the who's that you know 366 00:11:59,233 --> 00:12:00,166 and um um 367 00:12:00,783 --> 00:12:02,683 I got a slip to go to the office 368 00:12:03,066 --> 00:12:04,300 not knowing what I'm like okay 369 00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:06,100 we got in there and it's almost like am I in trouble 370 00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:07,433 what what's going on here 371 00:12:07,433 --> 00:12:09,066 you know you have no clue you mean like hey 372 00:12:09,066 --> 00:12:09,300 you know 373 00:12:09,300 --> 00:12:11,866 you go to the office whatever it's recruiting time so 374 00:12:11,866 --> 00:12:13,450 could be recruiting you don't know what it is 375 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,266 and I go down there it's like a movie I 376 00:12:15,266 --> 00:12:17,600 I come in there and um 377 00:12:18,083 --> 00:12:19,383 he turns around as coach 378 00:12:19,383 --> 00:12:21,583 Sherman Smith from Miami University 379 00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:22,400 he said hey 380 00:12:22,433 --> 00:12:24,283 what's going on I'm Sherman Smith 381 00:12:24,550 --> 00:12:26,766 I'm running back coach from Miami University 382 00:12:27,700 --> 00:12:28,983 I love it yeah 383 00:12:28,983 --> 00:12:31,366 I love it and so 384 00:12:31,466 --> 00:12:36,466 what did he tell you that made you want to go there 385 00:12:36,466 --> 00:12:36,950 what what 386 00:12:36,950 --> 00:12:39,766 what made you wanna follow him 387 00:12:40,033 --> 00:12:41,383 so I mean 388 00:12:41,383 --> 00:12:43,633 he's from Youngstown so he 389 00:12:43,633 --> 00:12:44,666 he's a known you know 390 00:12:44,666 --> 00:12:47,750 I mean he's a known person in Youngstown 391 00:12:47,750 --> 00:12:49,766 because he's from there he went to the NF 392 00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:52,183 I didn't know at that moment he went to Miami 393 00:12:52,183 --> 00:12:53,833 so that was a strong piece right there 394 00:12:53,833 --> 00:12:56,883 he actually attended he went to Miami and graduated 395 00:12:57,083 --> 00:12:57,950 I was drawn to him 396 00:12:57,950 --> 00:13:00,100 because I never been around a person like that 397 00:13:00,100 --> 00:13:01,883 yeah really good looking guy 398 00:13:03,066 --> 00:13:04,783 well spoken I hear I'm a quiet guy 399 00:13:04,783 --> 00:13:07,850 I'm an introverted guy he was very confident 400 00:13:08,133 --> 00:13:09,800 you know um 401 00:13:09,950 --> 00:13:12,666 well spoken graduated from college 402 00:13:12,666 --> 00:13:15,633 play in the NFL all these check marks 403 00:13:15,633 --> 00:13:16,983 and I'm like man check 404 00:13:16,983 --> 00:13:18,433 I wanna do that I wanna do that 405 00:13:18,433 --> 00:13:20,983 I wanna do that all these different things of a person 406 00:13:20,983 --> 00:13:22,033 right there in front of me 407 00:13:22,033 --> 00:13:23,500 so the opportunity to 408 00:13:23,500 --> 00:13:27,533 to go to Miami and be around somebody like him 409 00:13:27,583 --> 00:13:28,900 was something that you know 410 00:13:28,900 --> 00:13:30,433 was very intriguing to me 411 00:13:30,433 --> 00:13:31,666 yeah I love that 412 00:13:31,666 --> 00:13:32,950 and he he 413 00:13:32,950 --> 00:13:35,450 ended up being a really strong mentor for you 414 00:13:35,466 --> 00:13:35,866 I mean the 415 00:13:35,866 --> 00:13:38,233 the 30 year mentorship right yeah 416 00:13:38,233 --> 00:13:39,100 so I mean 417 00:13:39,100 --> 00:13:40,333 you know it ended up 418 00:13:40,666 --> 00:13:42,700 you know maybe a couple weeks later 419 00:13:42,700 --> 00:13:43,500 you know after we 420 00:13:43,500 --> 00:13:45,466 he came to the school we didn't have a 421 00:13:45,466 --> 00:13:46,433 you know we didn't have a phone 422 00:13:46,433 --> 00:13:49,650 we didn't have a car he came over and did a home visit 423 00:13:49,783 --> 00:13:50,550 you know that's something 424 00:13:50,550 --> 00:13:52,000 you know you know 425 00:13:52,150 --> 00:13:53,500 he understood you know 426 00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:56,650 he it didn't take him long to figure out 427 00:13:57,950 --> 00:14:00,400 the struggles that I had you know 428 00:14:00,833 --> 00:14:02,550 when I say the struggle yeah 429 00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:04,550 he knew that walking in the door like okay 430 00:14:04,550 --> 00:14:06,066 but he's from Youngstown sure yes 431 00:14:06,066 --> 00:14:07,750 he grew up he had both parents 432 00:14:07,750 --> 00:14:10,033 it was different he had a different um 433 00:14:10,033 --> 00:14:11,150 circumstance than I had 434 00:14:11,150 --> 00:14:12,883 as far as directly in the household 435 00:14:13,033 --> 00:14:14,100 so when he came in I mean 436 00:14:14,100 --> 00:14:16,433 we had a extension cord I mean 437 00:14:16,433 --> 00:14:19,283 it's kind of well documented coming from our next door 438 00:14:19,550 --> 00:14:20,500 I lived in a project 439 00:14:20,500 --> 00:14:22,533 so we had an extension cord that came through 440 00:14:22,633 --> 00:14:24,233 and that's that's 441 00:14:24,233 --> 00:14:25,300 that was the power in our house 442 00:14:25,300 --> 00:14:26,900 so going to the lamp that was in the room 443 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:29,883 so yeah we sat there but had a phenomenal his 444 00:14:29,900 --> 00:14:31,350 his disposition me 445 00:14:31,350 --> 00:14:32,600 he wasn't judging anything 446 00:14:32,983 --> 00:14:35,900 but I think he was gathering information like man 447 00:14:35,900 --> 00:14:39,583 this guy got a ton of reasons to be successful 448 00:14:39,583 --> 00:14:43,483 you know he got a ton of reasons this driving him to be 449 00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:44,466 you know more than 450 00:14:44,466 --> 00:14:46,583 probably what his environment would say he should be 451 00:14:46,583 --> 00:14:47,700 so um 452 00:14:47,700 --> 00:14:50,533 had a great home visit um 453 00:14:50,633 --> 00:14:52,150 Coach Smith drove me and my 454 00:14:52,150 --> 00:14:53,250 we didn't have a car 455 00:14:53,266 --> 00:14:56,433 he drove me and my mom to Miami University 456 00:14:56,433 --> 00:14:58,233 so he drove us up there for the visit 457 00:14:58,233 --> 00:15:00,400 wow I had a phenomenal visit 458 00:15:00,550 --> 00:15:02,766 and there was no way in the world that I wasn't 459 00:15:02,900 --> 00:15:04,550 going to Miami to be up under him 460 00:15:04,550 --> 00:15:05,183 and it was 461 00:15:05,183 --> 00:15:07,800 Miami was a different world for me because it was 462 00:15:08,066 --> 00:15:09,233 you know I mean 463 00:15:09,233 --> 00:15:11,666 Miami is called the Harvard of the Midwest 464 00:15:11,666 --> 00:15:13,833 I mean it's unbelievably beautiful school 465 00:15:13,833 --> 00:15:17,050 it is a a historically 466 00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:20,783 legendarily strong academic school 467 00:15:20,783 --> 00:15:21,300 yeah you know 468 00:15:21,300 --> 00:15:22,266 and I was saying wow 469 00:15:22,266 --> 00:15:25,900 I could really go out of the box by doing this 470 00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:27,666 because there's so many people 471 00:15:27,666 --> 00:15:30,333 like I actually had one of my teachers in the school 472 00:15:30,350 --> 00:15:33,450 she actually told me once I said I was going to Miami 473 00:15:33,466 --> 00:15:34,383 she looked at me and said 474 00:15:34,383 --> 00:15:36,133 there's no way you'll make it at Miami 475 00:15:36,233 --> 00:15:41,383 so I had so many things that were motivational to me 476 00:15:41,383 --> 00:15:42,983 as I ultimately went to Miami 477 00:15:42,983 --> 00:15:43,866 but those are the reasons 478 00:15:43,866 --> 00:15:45,133 I mean Coach Smith 479 00:15:45,183 --> 00:15:47,850 the campus the challenge 480 00:15:48,100 --> 00:15:50,350 and then the prestige that would come on the end 481 00:15:50,350 --> 00:15:53,083 of being somebody who made it through Miami 482 00:15:53,666 --> 00:15:55,350 yeah I get the sense that uh 483 00:15:55,350 --> 00:15:58,033 the best way to get you to do something is to tell you 484 00:15:58,033 --> 00:16:00,583 you can't you'll never be able to do it yeah 485 00:16:00,583 --> 00:16:02,750 yeah that's that because I heard that so much 486 00:16:02,750 --> 00:16:03,433 you know what I'm saying 487 00:16:03,433 --> 00:16:06,550 so growing up and I believed it for a while now yeah 488 00:16:06,550 --> 00:16:07,700 I believed it like hey 489 00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:08,750 you know I get it 490 00:16:08,750 --> 00:16:11,650 and it wasn't until opportunity presented itself 491 00:16:11,833 --> 00:16:14,733 and then I walked through that door 492 00:16:14,783 --> 00:16:15,783 and then you know 493 00:16:15,783 --> 00:16:16,950 and I know we'll get to this later on 494 00:16:16,950 --> 00:16:18,966 but then every step for me 495 00:16:19,266 --> 00:16:21,600 every mountain that I overcame 496 00:16:21,750 --> 00:16:23,666 there was another valley I had to go down 497 00:16:23,666 --> 00:16:24,633 because it was like okay 498 00:16:24,633 --> 00:16:26,350 you did you did this here 499 00:16:26,350 --> 00:16:28,633 but I can't you I bet you won't be able to do it here 500 00:16:28,633 --> 00:16:30,100 well in high school you did this 501 00:16:30,100 --> 00:16:31,983 but you won't be able to do this in college well 502 00:16:31,983 --> 00:16:33,833 and so on and so forth so I'm always 503 00:16:33,833 --> 00:16:35,866 I'm forever driven and for 504 00:16:35,866 --> 00:16:38,450 for me my path has forever been a rough path 505 00:16:39,550 --> 00:16:40,066 yeah but and 506 00:16:40,066 --> 00:16:42,150 and so let's get into that and 507 00:16:42,150 --> 00:16:45,083 and one one of the things that happened there um 508 00:16:45,150 --> 00:16:47,733 is that Coach Smith left Miami 509 00:16:47,783 --> 00:16:48,750 shortly after you got there 510 00:16:48,750 --> 00:16:50,150 didn't he so I 511 00:16:50,150 --> 00:16:50,633 you know I 512 00:16:50,633 --> 00:16:53,483 I'm fired up to go to Miami um 513 00:16:53,966 --> 00:16:56,866 and like right before I went there um 514 00:16:56,866 --> 00:16:58,783 maybe like the I went there in August 515 00:16:58,783 --> 00:17:00,833 so like maybe late July he called me 516 00:17:00,833 --> 00:17:02,866 and he talked about playing a different position 517 00:17:02,866 --> 00:17:03,833 he said you wanna 518 00:17:03,833 --> 00:17:05,450 we want you to play flanker 519 00:17:05,583 --> 00:17:07,633 which in the in my high school offense 520 00:17:07,633 --> 00:17:09,583 that was a running back so I'm like yeah 521 00:17:09,583 --> 00:17:11,783 no problem and I get there and it's a receiver 522 00:17:11,783 --> 00:17:14,150 I'm like alright so my 523 00:17:14,150 --> 00:17:17,650 my first my so in training camp I'm playing receiver 524 00:17:18,183 --> 00:17:22,150 and here I am I'm 5 10 150 pounds or whatever 525 00:17:22,150 --> 00:17:24,650 but I'm running around I'm catching the ball whatever 526 00:17:24,900 --> 00:17:26,433 and it wasn't until like 527 00:17:26,433 --> 00:17:28,200 the week before our first game 528 00:17:28,383 --> 00:17:31,000 we did a scrimmage and um 529 00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:32,933 I'm watching the running backs 530 00:17:33,100 --> 00:17:34,233 like I'm on the sideline 531 00:17:34,233 --> 00:17:36,066 I'm just watching some of the guys 532 00:17:36,066 --> 00:17:37,666 and I remember it was raining outside 533 00:17:37,666 --> 00:17:40,633 I remember me I started crying and I said I 534 00:17:40,633 --> 00:17:42,266 I don't wanna play receiver 535 00:17:42,266 --> 00:17:43,866 I wanna play running back yeah 536 00:17:43,866 --> 00:17:47,300 so I went to Coach Smith and I said hey 537 00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:49,150 I don't wanna play receiver 538 00:17:49,150 --> 00:17:50,883 he said we play this week 539 00:17:50,900 --> 00:17:53,100 you're gonna play you actually gonna play receiver 540 00:17:53,100 --> 00:17:54,200 you're in the game man 541 00:17:54,383 --> 00:17:56,250 you I mean you you a guy who earned this 542 00:17:56,383 --> 00:17:57,066 you gonna play 543 00:17:57,066 --> 00:17:58,700 you gonna get a little playtime at receiver 544 00:17:58,700 --> 00:18:01,300 I said I wanna play running back 545 00:18:01,300 --> 00:18:02,350 I wanna play running back 546 00:18:02,350 --> 00:18:06,283 so they move me back to running back and um 547 00:18:06,633 --> 00:18:08,066 I went like on the scout team 548 00:18:08,066 --> 00:18:10,350 I I redshirted and I said that's fine 549 00:18:10,350 --> 00:18:11,433 I'll I'll you know 550 00:18:11,433 --> 00:18:13,383 I'll you know I I wouldn't expect them 551 00:18:13,383 --> 00:18:13,633 I'm 552 00:18:13,633 --> 00:18:17,150 I know where my physical capacity was at that moment 553 00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:20,233 I'm like I ain't ready to in one week be ready to play 554 00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:21,950 we got good players here it was what it was 555 00:18:21,950 --> 00:18:24,200 so I redshirted that year 556 00:18:24,433 --> 00:18:26,783 um and after that season 557 00:18:26,783 --> 00:18:27,950 this one Coach Smith left 558 00:18:27,950 --> 00:18:30,766 so after my first season there my redshirt 559 00:18:33,150 --> 00:18:35,833 I appreciate about Coach Smith unlike 560 00:18:35,833 --> 00:18:38,550 you know unlike some of the other men in 561 00:18:38,550 --> 00:18:42,950 in my life is that he was respectful throughout 562 00:18:42,950 --> 00:18:45,600 he was even respectful on his way out 563 00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:47,466 you know he sat down 564 00:18:47,466 --> 00:18:49,466 he talked to us you know 565 00:18:49,466 --> 00:18:51,866 and that was new for me you know 566 00:18:51,866 --> 00:18:53,183 because all of the other 567 00:18:53,183 --> 00:18:55,100 and it wasn't like he was in relationship with my mom 568 00:18:55,100 --> 00:18:56,550 or anything but some of these other guys 569 00:18:56,550 --> 00:18:58,033 when they left out they kicking doors out 570 00:18:58,033 --> 00:18:59,633 busting windows on their way out 571 00:18:59,633 --> 00:19:00,600 you know police 572 00:19:00,633 --> 00:19:01,633 so it's crazy you know 573 00:19:01,633 --> 00:19:03,783 crazy stuff when they left with him 574 00:19:03,783 --> 00:19:05,433 and I noticed to me this 575 00:19:05,433 --> 00:19:07,550 the parallel in my mind yeah 576 00:19:07,550 --> 00:19:10,150 of somebody who was put in a power 577 00:19:10,150 --> 00:19:13,366 a position of power and influence over me 578 00:19:13,583 --> 00:19:17,133 who did it the right way he was respectful 579 00:19:17,150 --> 00:19:18,100 yeah all these things 580 00:19:18,100 --> 00:19:19,333 you know what I'm saying so 581 00:19:19,350 --> 00:19:21,950 I kind of connected dots in a little bit different way 582 00:19:21,950 --> 00:19:24,100 as it related to the you know 583 00:19:24,100 --> 00:19:26,366 the influential males in my life 584 00:19:26,900 --> 00:19:27,550 yeah and I 585 00:19:27,550 --> 00:19:27,866 so I mean 586 00:19:27,866 --> 00:19:29,266 I just get the sense that your life 587 00:19:29,266 --> 00:19:32,800 up to that point was you got abandoned by a lot of men 588 00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:36,283 and that had to have been 589 00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:38,233 that had to have been really challenging to you 590 00:19:38,233 --> 00:19:40,166 it had to have been really questioned 591 00:19:40,233 --> 00:19:40,383 you 592 00:19:40,383 --> 00:19:42,933 know your worth and that respect and all of that stuff 593 00:19:42,950 --> 00:19:45,733 and then here's a man again 594 00:19:45,750 --> 00:19:47,633 that you really look up to 595 00:19:47,633 --> 00:19:50,483 he's a mentor for you he's 596 00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:51,783 I mean you really respect him 597 00:19:51,783 --> 00:19:53,383 he's one of the very first people in your life 598 00:19:53,383 --> 00:19:54,466 that you really really 599 00:19:54,466 --> 00:19:56,600 really looked up to in that way 600 00:19:56,866 --> 00:19:58,750 and then he now he's abandoning you too 601 00:19:58,750 --> 00:20:00,650 but he did it in a way 602 00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,383 it sounds like he did it in a way that it 603 00:20:02,383 --> 00:20:03,466 you didn't feel abandoned 604 00:20:03,466 --> 00:20:04,533 you felt no 605 00:20:04,783 --> 00:20:06,266 a different way no 606 00:20:06,266 --> 00:20:08,100 I I did not feel abandoned at all 607 00:20:08,100 --> 00:20:09,533 you know and for somebody 608 00:20:09,666 --> 00:20:09,983 you know 609 00:20:09,983 --> 00:20:11,750 outside of my grandpa and different things like that 610 00:20:11,750 --> 00:20:13,950 somebody who I'm on a daily basis with 611 00:20:13,950 --> 00:20:15,183 who I kind of went to the school 612 00:20:15,183 --> 00:20:16,583 that's why I went to Miami 613 00:20:16,583 --> 00:20:17,833 it was called Miami is a great school 614 00:20:17,833 --> 00:20:19,283 I went there cause it's Coach Smith 615 00:20:19,533 --> 00:20:20,550 yeah um yeah 616 00:20:20,550 --> 00:20:22,433 so and so I had no 617 00:20:22,433 --> 00:20:23,500 I mean my respect for him 618 00:20:23,500 --> 00:20:24,666 I wasn't like oh man 619 00:20:24,666 --> 00:20:26,300 you abandoned me I didn't feel like that 620 00:20:26,300 --> 00:20:28,333 I felt like this is business 621 00:20:29,150 --> 00:20:31,150 um he handled it the right way 622 00:20:31,150 --> 00:20:32,866 and what I really appreciate is he said look 623 00:20:32,866 --> 00:20:33,783 I told these guys 624 00:20:33,783 --> 00:20:35,700 give you a chance to play running back 625 00:20:35,700 --> 00:20:37,300 uh huh so that was something 626 00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:37,700 because we had 627 00:20:37,700 --> 00:20:40,833 just had two guys who were all conference the year 628 00:20:40,833 --> 00:20:42,383 I didn't play but he was like 629 00:20:42,383 --> 00:20:43,783 I told these guys give you a chance 630 00:20:43,783 --> 00:20:45,400 to play running back so 631 00:20:45,433 --> 00:20:47,633 that was kind of his last little thing 632 00:20:47,633 --> 00:20:49,666 that he asked the coach give this guy a chance 633 00:20:49,666 --> 00:20:51,633 you know so I'm glad he did 634 00:20:51,633 --> 00:20:53,466 I'm glad he did and that worked out 635 00:20:53,466 --> 00:20:55,233 that worked out okay that worked out 636 00:20:55,233 --> 00:20:57,733 so that that spring um 637 00:20:58,100 --> 00:21:00,183 you know I remember the head coach 638 00:21:00,183 --> 00:21:01,550 phenomenal guy I'm 639 00:21:01,550 --> 00:21:02,783 he's passed he's deceased now 640 00:21:02,783 --> 00:21:04,550 but phenomenal guy coach Randy Walker 641 00:21:04,550 --> 00:21:05,450 he said look 642 00:21:06,033 --> 00:21:07,950 um we're gonna give you a chance at running back 643 00:21:07,950 --> 00:21:09,383 if you don't make it out 644 00:21:09,383 --> 00:21:11,833 if you're not in the top three guys at running back 645 00:21:11,833 --> 00:21:13,733 we're gonna move you to free safety 646 00:21:14,066 --> 00:21:15,633 I said that's fine too you know 647 00:21:15,633 --> 00:21:16,583 I was a receiver before 648 00:21:16,583 --> 00:21:18,433 but I'm really good defensive back too 649 00:21:18,433 --> 00:21:19,683 I said that's fine 650 00:21:19,750 --> 00:21:22,450 no problem we just had two guys who were all conference 651 00:21:22,666 --> 00:21:24,033 and I'm at running back 652 00:21:24,033 --> 00:21:26,633 so we go on the spring and never look back 653 00:21:26,633 --> 00:21:29,683 I became the starter and I started the next four years 654 00:21:29,783 --> 00:21:31,833 broke every record wow 655 00:21:31,833 --> 00:21:33,550 yep yep yeah 656 00:21:33,550 --> 00:21:36,600 that's amazing and so um 657 00:21:36,783 --> 00:21:39,383 once kind of college started to end 658 00:21:39,383 --> 00:21:40,200 then what happened 659 00:21:40,833 --> 00:21:43,183 so I mean I go through the next four years 660 00:21:43,183 --> 00:21:45,033 you know phenomenal career 661 00:21:45,033 --> 00:21:49,133 broke every record at Miami and for the conference um 662 00:21:49,550 --> 00:21:51,283 you know you know 663 00:21:51,433 --> 00:21:54,633 I'm excited cause man I'm graduating all these things 664 00:21:54,633 --> 00:21:56,633 it's like so many things that I overcame 665 00:21:56,633 --> 00:21:58,266 cause I don't think anybody really forecasted 666 00:21:58,266 --> 00:22:01,166 me being that level of college football player yeah 667 00:22:01,183 --> 00:22:02,750 and you know 668 00:22:02,750 --> 00:22:04,233 for me to you know 669 00:22:04,233 --> 00:22:07,250 go through school have a phenomenal um 670 00:22:08,700 --> 00:22:11,900 excuse me a phenomenal athletic career there 671 00:22:11,900 --> 00:22:14,700 but then academically my GPA was higher at Miami 672 00:22:14,700 --> 00:22:15,900 Miami is a hard school 673 00:22:15,900 --> 00:22:17,750 I had a higher grade point average at Miami 674 00:22:17,750 --> 00:22:18,900 than I had in high school 675 00:22:18,900 --> 00:22:20,850 I wasn't asking about that yeah 676 00:22:20,850 --> 00:22:21,750 yeah so here I am 677 00:22:21,750 --> 00:22:22,100 I you know 678 00:22:22,100 --> 00:22:23,183 I'm a much you know 679 00:22:23,183 --> 00:22:25,350 my ability scholastically 680 00:22:25,350 --> 00:22:28,950 was on par with what my expectations were for myself 681 00:22:28,950 --> 00:22:32,483 because I didn't look at high school the right way 682 00:22:32,900 --> 00:22:34,150 my sons don't look at it I 683 00:22:34,150 --> 00:22:35,550 I changed that too 684 00:22:35,550 --> 00:22:37,666 that's something that I passed on to my sons 685 00:22:37,666 --> 00:22:39,550 that high school matters for me 686 00:22:39,550 --> 00:22:40,183 it didn't matter 687 00:22:40,183 --> 00:22:42,433 cause I didn't see myself going beyond high school 688 00:22:42,433 --> 00:22:44,100 yeah so 689 00:22:44,100 --> 00:22:44,383 you know 690 00:22:44,383 --> 00:22:46,583 it wasn't till my senior year that it kicked in like 691 00:22:46,583 --> 00:22:48,183 wait a minute I actually could go to college 692 00:22:48,183 --> 00:22:49,650 so when I got to college 693 00:22:50,066 --> 00:22:51,750 it was serious to me I'm like wow 694 00:22:51,750 --> 00:22:54,933 now I feel like I was on like a whole another plane 695 00:22:55,100 --> 00:22:56,233 and I felt like man 696 00:22:56,233 --> 00:22:57,466 God got a plan for me 697 00:22:57,466 --> 00:23:01,200 because every matrix would say I should not be here 698 00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:02,866 I should not be in college 699 00:23:02,866 --> 00:23:04,833 I definitely shouldn't be at this school 700 00:23:04,833 --> 00:23:07,733 yeah based on everything that I had been through 701 00:23:07,833 --> 00:23:09,833 so I felt every year of college was like 702 00:23:09,833 --> 00:23:14,450 the ultimate blessing and giving me a platform to show 703 00:23:15,100 --> 00:23:17,966 where somebody from this environment can go 704 00:23:18,150 --> 00:23:22,100 so that was really really big for me that like wow 705 00:23:22,100 --> 00:23:23,866 I'm I'm in like you know 706 00:23:23,866 --> 00:23:25,333 to continue to ascend 707 00:23:25,350 --> 00:23:27,033 with some things on and off the field 708 00:23:27,033 --> 00:23:28,950 so I wanted to make sure that I handled that 709 00:23:28,950 --> 00:23:29,766 the right way 710 00:23:30,350 --> 00:23:31,733 so what happened after college 711 00:23:31,950 --> 00:23:33,633 so get through you know 712 00:23:33,633 --> 00:23:35,950 you know it was had a great career 713 00:23:35,950 --> 00:23:36,433 I'm like hey 714 00:23:36,433 --> 00:23:37,600 here we go you know 715 00:23:37,783 --> 00:23:40,183 had great workouts for NFL teams 716 00:23:40,183 --> 00:23:42,433 I'm a I wouldn't a 150 pound guy no more 717 00:23:42,433 --> 00:23:44,500 I'm a 210 pound guy wow 718 00:23:44,500 --> 00:23:45,300 I thought you know 719 00:23:45,300 --> 00:23:46,550 here I am I'm running you know 720 00:23:46,550 --> 00:23:48,833 I'm doing all these things on my pro workouts 721 00:23:48,833 --> 00:23:50,883 I'm killing it um 722 00:23:51,183 --> 00:23:53,550 you know but it goes to what I said again 723 00:23:53,550 --> 00:23:57,866 just my life track is the rough track 724 00:23:57,866 --> 00:24:00,450 yeah even when I've done great things 725 00:24:00,866 --> 00:24:02,683 it's the rough track I had a great 726 00:24:02,900 --> 00:24:05,366 you know at least a great senior year in high school 727 00:24:05,833 --> 00:24:07,300 I don't even I'm not even 728 00:24:07,300 --> 00:24:08,866 I don't even come in as a running back 729 00:24:08,866 --> 00:24:10,583 like a running back so no 730 00:24:10,583 --> 00:24:12,033 you gonna play something else 731 00:24:12,033 --> 00:24:13,633 I have a four year career 732 00:24:13,633 --> 00:24:17,166 that's unbelievable I don't get drafted 733 00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:19,033 like everything say 734 00:24:19,033 --> 00:24:20,750 how in the world don't you not get drafted 735 00:24:20,750 --> 00:24:22,300 yeah that's just my life track 736 00:24:22,300 --> 00:24:25,000 I go to the Cincinnati Bengals alright 737 00:24:25,033 --> 00:24:27,133 I'm the last guy on the depth chart 738 00:24:27,350 --> 00:24:28,700 that's fine hey 739 00:24:28,700 --> 00:24:30,300 you went to a small school and you 740 00:24:30,300 --> 00:24:31,550 you weren't drafted 741 00:24:31,550 --> 00:24:33,066 and you're the last guy on the depth chart 742 00:24:33,066 --> 00:24:34,900 you're used to being the last guy on the depth chart 743 00:24:34,900 --> 00:24:35,900 I'm like unfortunately 744 00:24:35,900 --> 00:24:36,633 but you you 745 00:24:36,633 --> 00:24:39,033 it's like you get mad about it cause you're like 746 00:24:39,033 --> 00:24:40,300 did I earn to to be 747 00:24:40,300 --> 00:24:40,700 at what 748 00:24:40,700 --> 00:24:43,266 point do I stop being the last guy in the death chart 749 00:24:43,266 --> 00:24:43,700 you know when 750 00:24:43,700 --> 00:24:45,833 when am I when do I stop being the last guy 751 00:24:45,833 --> 00:24:47,650 when do I stop being the second choice 752 00:24:47,700 --> 00:24:48,700 fourth choice whatever 753 00:24:48,700 --> 00:24:50,483 so um 754 00:24:50,783 --> 00:24:53,666 I go to the Bengals I'm the last guy on the depth chart 755 00:24:53,666 --> 00:24:55,350 but by the end of training camp 756 00:24:55,350 --> 00:24:55,833 you know 757 00:24:55,833 --> 00:25:01,150 I lead the NFL in rushing and all indications are hey 758 00:25:01,150 --> 00:25:04,383 you've done enough to contend to be the starter 759 00:25:04,383 --> 00:25:06,450 yeah and I get hurt 760 00:25:07,150 --> 00:25:08,666 so at the conclusion 761 00:25:08,666 --> 00:25:12,383 the last pre season game with the Bengals 762 00:25:12,383 --> 00:25:14,250 I blow out my knee an extreme 763 00:25:14,783 --> 00:25:18,133 um extremely bad knee injury 764 00:25:18,433 --> 00:25:21,033 so here I am I'm back on the bottom okay 765 00:25:21,033 --> 00:25:22,283 I'm on I'm on 766 00:25:22,733 --> 00:25:23,766 I'm on um 767 00:25:23,783 --> 00:25:26,383 injured reserve so I'm like okay 768 00:25:26,383 --> 00:25:27,500 now I'm battling back uphill 769 00:25:27,500 --> 00:25:28,900 I come back the following year 770 00:25:28,900 --> 00:25:30,150 I shouldn't have came back so quick 771 00:25:30,150 --> 00:25:32,033 cause it was so many I come back 772 00:25:32,033 --> 00:25:34,466 I run faster than I did the year before 773 00:25:34,466 --> 00:25:36,100 no kidding all these things 774 00:25:36,100 --> 00:25:39,033 but my knee is really really messed up 775 00:25:39,033 --> 00:25:40,650 so um 776 00:25:41,033 --> 00:25:44,300 the Bengals released me early and I appreciated that 777 00:25:44,300 --> 00:25:44,750 it said look 778 00:25:44,750 --> 00:25:46,100 we're releasing you early enough 779 00:25:46,100 --> 00:25:47,733 so you can get on another team 780 00:25:47,950 --> 00:25:49,933 I go to the Philadelphia Eagles 781 00:25:50,533 --> 00:25:52,883 I have a phenomenal workout there 782 00:25:53,066 --> 00:25:53,700 I you know 783 00:25:53,700 --> 00:25:58,266 I'm on the team and my I blow my right knee out again 784 00:25:58,266 --> 00:25:59,950 so it's my second ACL surgery 785 00:25:59,950 --> 00:26:01,050 so I'm saying hey 786 00:26:01,066 --> 00:26:03,233 I'm kind of done you know 787 00:26:03,233 --> 00:26:03,900 and to me I 788 00:26:03,900 --> 00:26:05,666 I felt like I had accomplished a lot 789 00:26:05,666 --> 00:26:07,233 I overcame a lot of things 790 00:26:07,233 --> 00:26:11,183 I got a degree I'd always wanted to continue to work 791 00:26:11,183 --> 00:26:13,500 and this is probably like my driving force to a degree 792 00:26:13,500 --> 00:26:14,366 still is 793 00:26:14,900 --> 00:26:17,700 is seeing people reach their full potential 794 00:26:17,700 --> 00:26:22,033 so I I've always knew like NFL was not my goal 795 00:26:22,033 --> 00:26:23,833 that wasn't my goal that kind of 796 00:26:23,833 --> 00:26:25,433 I kind of fell into yeah 797 00:26:25,433 --> 00:26:26,750 the opportunity to go to the NFL 798 00:26:26,750 --> 00:26:27,866 but once I was going through college 799 00:26:27,866 --> 00:26:28,766 I said man 800 00:26:28,900 --> 00:26:31,766 I wanna be able to do something to give back to guys 801 00:26:32,033 --> 00:26:33,383 you know at risk guys 802 00:26:33,383 --> 00:26:35,383 guys from rough backgrounds 803 00:26:35,383 --> 00:26:36,350 different things like that 804 00:26:36,350 --> 00:26:38,083 so when the 805 00:26:38,966 --> 00:26:41,733 after the second surgery from going to Philly 806 00:26:42,150 --> 00:26:44,433 I was living in Columbus um 807 00:26:44,433 --> 00:26:45,866 and I started working at a group 808 00:26:45,866 --> 00:26:48,483 I worked at a group home with at risk kids 809 00:26:48,500 --> 00:26:50,433 wow and I felt like that's my calling man 810 00:26:50,433 --> 00:26:52,633 I felt like I was really um 811 00:26:52,633 --> 00:26:55,483 strong there and giving guidance and mentorship 812 00:26:55,750 --> 00:26:57,383 and while I was doing that 813 00:26:57,383 --> 00:27:00,066 I got a call from Canada the CFL 814 00:27:00,066 --> 00:27:01,450 Canadian Football League yeah 815 00:27:01,783 --> 00:27:03,383 so hey 816 00:27:03,383 --> 00:27:05,200 let's go play some ball absolutely 817 00:27:05,583 --> 00:27:09,666 so I went I worked at the group home in the off season 818 00:27:09,666 --> 00:27:12,083 I went to Canada that was 1998 819 00:27:12,866 --> 00:27:15,666 I came back worked in the group home 820 00:27:15,666 --> 00:27:17,500 which is where I went met my wife 821 00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:19,466 met my wife my second year there 822 00:27:19,466 --> 00:27:22,233 going into my second year into the CFL 823 00:27:22,233 --> 00:27:25,850 I go to the CFL have a great year that year 824 00:27:26,300 --> 00:27:28,083 um come back 825 00:27:28,100 --> 00:27:30,466 all opportunities or is 826 00:27:30,466 --> 00:27:31,700 everything is leaning towards me 827 00:27:31,700 --> 00:27:32,700 going right back to the NFL 828 00:27:32,700 --> 00:27:33,383 cause I had a really 829 00:27:33,383 --> 00:27:35,600 really good year my second year in Canada 830 00:27:36,066 --> 00:27:38,983 and then I go to my I'm not my interview 831 00:27:38,983 --> 00:27:40,250 I go to my um 832 00:27:40,300 --> 00:27:41,250 my um 833 00:27:41,433 --> 00:27:43,000 physical for the Bengals 834 00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:44,783 and um 835 00:27:44,783 --> 00:27:46,266 I'm supposed to go back to the Bengals 836 00:27:46,266 --> 00:27:46,783 I'm like hey 837 00:27:46,783 --> 00:27:47,850 it's all good 838 00:27:47,866 --> 00:27:50,950 and come to find out my left knee was blown out 839 00:27:50,950 --> 00:27:53,900 I blew it out in Canada oh my gosh 840 00:27:53,900 --> 00:27:55,066 so that was that you know 841 00:27:55,066 --> 00:27:56,300 at the end of the day I said 842 00:27:56,300 --> 00:27:58,033 you know and I felt good about my career 843 00:27:58,033 --> 00:28:00,933 I said nobody whatever took question my toughness 844 00:28:01,266 --> 00:28:03,933 and everybody knew that when I played 845 00:28:04,100 --> 00:28:06,066 I was really really good 846 00:28:06,066 --> 00:28:07,233 you know when I was really good 847 00:28:07,233 --> 00:28:08,150 so for me 848 00:28:08,150 --> 00:28:10,050 from where I came from and everything 849 00:28:10,350 --> 00:28:13,583 and all of the struggles and adversity I had 850 00:28:13,583 --> 00:28:17,166 I said I proved my point as a football player 851 00:28:17,266 --> 00:28:18,783 and now I want to prove my point 852 00:28:18,783 --> 00:28:20,866 as what I could do outside of football 853 00:28:20,866 --> 00:28:23,633 yeah I'd say you blew it out of the water frankly 854 00:28:23,633 --> 00:28:24,900 I mean in terms of 855 00:28:24,900 --> 00:28:28,483 in terms of what you had any right to expect 856 00:28:29,066 --> 00:28:30,266 exactly you blew it out of the water 857 00:28:30,266 --> 00:28:31,250 yeah 858 00:28:31,983 --> 00:28:34,883 so then what so you're out of football 859 00:28:35,266 --> 00:28:35,983 yeah okay 860 00:28:35,983 --> 00:28:39,250 so keep on going so I'm done with football um 861 00:28:39,350 --> 00:28:41,700 I got the two years of working in a group home 862 00:28:41,700 --> 00:28:44,133 because I was I'd already said to myself look 863 00:28:44,150 --> 00:28:46,466 especially after my my second injury 864 00:28:46,466 --> 00:28:49,150 I said let me get ready for life after football 865 00:28:49,150 --> 00:28:49,950 yeah you know 866 00:28:49,950 --> 00:28:51,400 I said because I don't want 867 00:28:51,466 --> 00:28:52,466 you know yes 868 00:28:52,466 --> 00:28:54,833 I walk in with a resume saying hey 869 00:28:54,833 --> 00:28:56,833 um I played in the NFL 870 00:28:56,833 --> 00:28:57,800 I said yeah 871 00:28:58,266 --> 00:28:59,350 that's gonna help a little bit 872 00:28:59,350 --> 00:29:00,266 it'll open doors yeah 873 00:29:00,266 --> 00:29:01,466 no question it'll open some doors 874 00:29:01,466 --> 00:29:02,983 but it'd be nice to have some experience 875 00:29:02,983 --> 00:29:05,033 to go along with it and I knew what I wanted to do 876 00:29:05,033 --> 00:29:06,483 I knew what I wanted to do 877 00:29:06,633 --> 00:29:08,133 so um 878 00:29:08,383 --> 00:29:09,183 my um 879 00:29:09,233 --> 00:29:10,800 we were living in Cincinnati 880 00:29:11,100 --> 00:29:13,850 my old I just had my oldest son um 881 00:29:14,183 --> 00:29:15,200 and um 882 00:29:15,633 --> 00:29:18,100 a guy who played for the Bengals 883 00:29:18,100 --> 00:29:19,300 not when I was there he was 884 00:29:19,300 --> 00:29:21,266 he had played before I got in the NFL 885 00:29:21,266 --> 00:29:22,850 or before I was with the Bengals 886 00:29:23,383 --> 00:29:24,350 um he was there 887 00:29:24,350 --> 00:29:26,783 a guy named Joe Kelly he 888 00:29:26,783 --> 00:29:29,833 he had contracted with the um 889 00:29:29,833 --> 00:29:31,666 Hamilton County in Cincinnati 890 00:29:31,666 --> 00:29:35,633 and he had around six or seven group homes that he ran 891 00:29:35,633 --> 00:29:38,283 like actual houses but they had at risk kids 892 00:29:38,500 --> 00:29:40,466 and I went in and interview with him 893 00:29:40,466 --> 00:29:41,033 he said man 894 00:29:41,033 --> 00:29:43,833 you've been doing this already so I was like check yeah 895 00:29:43,833 --> 00:29:46,950 I've been doing this so he made me a house manager 896 00:29:46,950 --> 00:29:49,400 so I managed the whole I had a whole house 897 00:29:49,433 --> 00:29:51,950 wow that I that I managed and um 898 00:29:51,950 --> 00:29:53,033 so we had guys there 899 00:29:53,033 --> 00:29:55,466 they were high school they were high school age um 900 00:29:55,466 --> 00:29:58,583 guys and so I would take them to school in the morning 901 00:29:58,583 --> 00:29:59,433 we get up hey 902 00:29:59,433 --> 00:30:00,800 we you know I 903 00:30:01,033 --> 00:30:02,650 they make breakfast and you 904 00:30:02,833 --> 00:30:04,350 I go up make sure their room is done 905 00:30:04,350 --> 00:30:05,383 make sure they boom boom boom boom 906 00:30:05,383 --> 00:30:06,666 all these things are done 907 00:30:06,666 --> 00:30:07,983 and then I take them to school in the 908 00:30:07,983 --> 00:30:10,350 in a 15 passenger van I take them to school wow 909 00:30:10,350 --> 00:30:14,250 so the school that I took them to um um 910 00:30:14,750 --> 00:30:15,833 there was a guy there 911 00:30:15,833 --> 00:30:18,700 who was a teacher who I played with at Miami 912 00:30:18,700 --> 00:30:20,666 no kidding so I'm dropping him off 913 00:30:20,666 --> 00:30:22,750 I hadn't seen him in four or five years he like 914 00:30:22,750 --> 00:30:24,500 oh my goodness what you been doing 915 00:30:24,500 --> 00:30:24,950 I said hey 916 00:30:24,950 --> 00:30:26,833 I you know kind of told him and he said 917 00:30:26,833 --> 00:30:28,366 you need to be here 918 00:30:28,633 --> 00:30:31,333 because the school I went to was a charter school 919 00:30:31,466 --> 00:30:34,300 and charter schools on the surface are for 920 00:30:34,300 --> 00:30:35,950 it's an alternative schooling 921 00:30:35,950 --> 00:30:37,266 yeah for you know 922 00:30:37,266 --> 00:30:38,866 it's an alternative it's a public school 923 00:30:38,866 --> 00:30:40,250 but it's an alternative school 924 00:30:40,500 --> 00:30:41,983 and at least at that time 925 00:30:41,983 --> 00:30:44,683 the beginning stages of charters were just happening 926 00:30:44,783 --> 00:30:47,700 in Ohio and they were really like a 927 00:30:47,700 --> 00:30:48,433 a spot where 928 00:30:48,433 --> 00:30:50,950 the kids who couldn't make it at their public school 929 00:30:50,950 --> 00:30:52,466 the traditional public school went to 930 00:30:52,466 --> 00:30:56,783 so you got on paper allegedly the bad kids 931 00:30:56,783 --> 00:30:59,150 yeah the kids who failed out truant 932 00:30:59,150 --> 00:31:00,400 different things like that 933 00:31:00,666 --> 00:31:01,433 so he's like 934 00:31:01,433 --> 00:31:03,266 you need to be here so 935 00:31:03,266 --> 00:31:07,483 I always talk to guys about the power of relationships 936 00:31:07,550 --> 00:31:08,866 because come to find out 937 00:31:08,866 --> 00:31:12,983 the guy who ran the school was a professor at Miami 938 00:31:12,983 --> 00:31:15,350 no kidding he had never was 939 00:31:15,350 --> 00:31:17,033 he never was one of my professors 940 00:31:17,033 --> 00:31:19,633 yeah but um 941 00:31:19,633 --> 00:31:22,033 like two days later I'm interviewing right there on the 942 00:31:22,033 --> 00:31:23,366 on the sidewalk 943 00:31:23,383 --> 00:31:26,066 cause he came out and I'm interviewing with him 944 00:31:26,066 --> 00:31:26,783 and he was like yeah 945 00:31:26,783 --> 00:31:28,566 I was at Miami while you were there 946 00:31:28,600 --> 00:31:31,383 and he said one thing that we respected about you and 947 00:31:31,383 --> 00:31:33,400 and no I was not the valedictorian 948 00:31:35,100 --> 00:31:36,200 he said but what I 949 00:31:36,350 --> 00:31:39,266 what teachers and faculty respected about you 950 00:31:39,266 --> 00:31:41,033 here you are big man on campus 951 00:31:41,033 --> 00:31:43,400 but you didn't conduct yourself that way 952 00:31:43,633 --> 00:31:45,366 you came to class every day 953 00:31:46,066 --> 00:31:49,066 you did your work you were respectful of the process 954 00:31:49,066 --> 00:31:52,066 you were respectful of what people were in school to do 955 00:31:52,066 --> 00:31:53,383 which is to get education 956 00:31:53,383 --> 00:31:54,300 yeah you came 957 00:31:54,300 --> 00:31:55,566 sat down took notes 958 00:31:56,183 --> 00:31:57,850 you wouldn't ask him for favors 959 00:31:57,950 --> 00:31:59,383 you did what you were supposed to do 960 00:31:59,383 --> 00:32:01,900 he said and people across the university knew that 961 00:32:01,900 --> 00:32:03,866 they respected that cause people like hey 962 00:32:03,866 --> 00:32:06,233 they went to the games and this Dylan Mccullough guy 963 00:32:06,233 --> 00:32:07,266 and we be sitting there 964 00:32:07,266 --> 00:32:08,983 at a faculty meeting whatever and say yeah 965 00:32:08,983 --> 00:32:11,683 he's in my class he sit down and do his work 966 00:32:11,866 --> 00:32:13,300 he work hard I said 967 00:32:13,300 --> 00:32:15,666 so here you are now and I tell guys who I coach now 968 00:32:15,666 --> 00:32:18,750 you never know your teachers that you have 969 00:32:18,750 --> 00:32:20,183 it could be years from now 970 00:32:20,183 --> 00:32:21,800 they could be hiring you 971 00:32:22,033 --> 00:32:24,433 based on the impression that you made on them 972 00:32:24,433 --> 00:32:26,833 yeah and it wasn't about being a phenomenal student 973 00:32:26,833 --> 00:32:28,800 it was about being a decent person 974 00:32:28,866 --> 00:32:33,483 you know so here I am interviewing with this with um 975 00:32:33,550 --> 00:32:36,683 Dave Nordic that's that was his name and he hired me 976 00:32:36,783 --> 00:32:40,500 so now I'm like perfect I'm in a school 977 00:32:40,500 --> 00:32:41,633 I love the school 978 00:32:41,633 --> 00:32:43,550 aspect'cause the hours were better'cause 979 00:32:43,550 --> 00:32:45,900 I work 12 hour shifts at the group home right 980 00:32:45,900 --> 00:32:46,300 so you know 981 00:32:46,300 --> 00:32:48,683 I I wouldn't see I wouldn't see my son 982 00:32:48,783 --> 00:32:51,350 I would see him laying down before we be sleep 983 00:32:51,350 --> 00:32:53,750 before I went to to work and be sleep when I get home 984 00:32:53,750 --> 00:32:55,866 yeah so going into a school atmosphere 985 00:32:55,866 --> 00:32:56,433 I'm like wow 986 00:32:56,433 --> 00:32:59,183 I got the hours this I'm like this gonna be perfect 987 00:32:59,183 --> 00:33:00,583 I never was a teacher before 988 00:33:00,583 --> 00:33:01,550 that wasn't with my 989 00:33:01,550 --> 00:33:04,833 my major in school was sociology and coaching 990 00:33:04,833 --> 00:33:07,833 ironically it just not because I wanted to coach 991 00:33:07,833 --> 00:33:10,833 it was because some of my PE classes fell into coaching 992 00:33:10,833 --> 00:33:11,550 yeah yeah 993 00:33:11,550 --> 00:33:13,250 so maybe that was a precursor 994 00:33:13,433 --> 00:33:16,166 because I never was interested in coaching 995 00:33:16,466 --> 00:33:17,833 I get to this school 996 00:33:17,833 --> 00:33:20,233 they were just starting a football team wow wow 997 00:33:20,233 --> 00:33:21,750 like they were just starting it was a new school 998 00:33:21,750 --> 00:33:23,000 they were starting a football team 999 00:33:23,100 --> 00:33:26,950 and I'm in Cincinnati Miami of Ohio is 40 minutes 1000 00:33:26,950 --> 00:33:28,866 45 minutes away from Cincinnati yeah 1001 00:33:28,866 --> 00:33:30,150 and I played for the Bengals 1002 00:33:30,150 --> 00:33:31,850 so everybody in the world like 1003 00:33:31,850 --> 00:33:33,350 you definitely coaching right 1004 00:33:33,350 --> 00:33:35,966 I'm like no no I'm not wow no 1005 00:33:36,266 --> 00:33:37,900 I'm not I'm not interested in coaching 1006 00:33:37,900 --> 00:33:39,950 I'm what I was gonna be doing 1007 00:33:39,950 --> 00:33:42,433 that working with the kids was my 1008 00:33:42,433 --> 00:33:43,950 was my thing you know 1009 00:33:43,950 --> 00:33:46,366 and it's and just kind of jumping back for a second 1010 00:33:46,383 --> 00:33:48,150 I just got done telling you 15 1011 00:33:48,150 --> 00:33:51,633 20 minutes ago my upbringing story right 1012 00:33:51,633 --> 00:33:54,433 no one in the world would say 1013 00:33:54,433 --> 00:33:57,266 Dylan Mccalla is gonna stand up and teach the guy 1014 00:33:57,266 --> 00:33:58,200 don't talk 1015 00:33:58,833 --> 00:34:00,466 he doesn't speak hahaha 1016 00:34:00,466 --> 00:34:02,350 how is he gonna how is he gonna teach somebody 1017 00:34:02,350 --> 00:34:04,266 he don't he don't talk yeah 1018 00:34:04,266 --> 00:34:06,550 you know but what I did over the years 1019 00:34:06,550 --> 00:34:07,233 I mean and that 1020 00:34:07,233 --> 00:34:09,266 that was a stigma that was with me for a while 1021 00:34:09,266 --> 00:34:10,433 even when I went to college 1022 00:34:10,433 --> 00:34:14,050 I was a really like my first year guys on the team 1023 00:34:14,383 --> 00:34:14,666 you know 1024 00:34:14,666 --> 00:34:16,750 I would talk to my team but I was really short 1025 00:34:16,750 --> 00:34:19,200 you know I was a great teammate I worked hard 1026 00:34:19,383 --> 00:34:20,700 but I always felt like 1027 00:34:20,700 --> 00:34:21,950 somebody gonna take this from me 1028 00:34:21,950 --> 00:34:23,033 this gonna get taken from me 1029 00:34:23,033 --> 00:34:24,033 this gonna get taken from me 1030 00:34:24,033 --> 00:34:25,133 so I was really 1031 00:34:25,983 --> 00:34:26,300 like 1032 00:34:26,300 --> 00:34:30,166 in my own zone and protective of kind of what anxious 1033 00:34:30,433 --> 00:34:33,066 what I wanted to do what I needed to try to get done 1034 00:34:33,066 --> 00:34:33,583 and I even 1035 00:34:33,583 --> 00:34:37,150 I felt for years like something gonna go wrong and I'm 1036 00:34:37,150 --> 00:34:38,550 it's not gonna work out yeah 1037 00:34:38,550 --> 00:34:40,900 I just that was just kind of how I was built up 1038 00:34:40,900 --> 00:34:43,683 you know to a degree just maybe how my thinking was 1039 00:34:44,200 --> 00:34:46,150 but fast forward several years 1040 00:34:46,150 --> 00:34:47,766 here I am in the school setting 1041 00:34:48,066 --> 00:34:52,750 you know and even just my tone and and vocabulary now 1042 00:34:52,750 --> 00:34:54,433 it blows people away when I go home 1043 00:34:54,433 --> 00:34:56,533 they said this wasn't you when you were here 1044 00:34:56,700 --> 00:34:58,500 we never got to hear your vocabulary 1045 00:34:58,500 --> 00:35:01,250 cause you didn't talk you barely spoke to anybody 1046 00:35:01,466 --> 00:35:03,150 so so anyway fast forward here I am 1047 00:35:03,150 --> 00:35:05,500 I'm now I'm an English teacher wow 1048 00:35:05,500 --> 00:35:07,666 you know and and I'm sitting here you know 1049 00:35:07,666 --> 00:35:07,900 he was like 1050 00:35:07,900 --> 00:35:10,433 I want you to teach communications I'm like okay 1051 00:35:10,433 --> 00:35:13,683 I was the fourth communications teacher that year 1052 00:35:13,833 --> 00:35:15,033 they're rolling guys up out of there 1053 00:35:15,033 --> 00:35:16,083 the guys couldn't have 1054 00:35:16,100 --> 00:35:17,833 and I came in there and it wouldn't happen 1055 00:35:17,833 --> 00:35:21,600 I came in and said boom here we go you know 1056 00:35:21,633 --> 00:35:24,300 and and one of the first people 1057 00:35:24,300 --> 00:35:25,850 this was really interesting 1058 00:35:26,100 --> 00:35:29,933 really interesting we had the it was like the classic 1059 00:35:31,233 --> 00:35:32,633 not I wouldn't call him a bully 1060 00:35:32,633 --> 00:35:36,800 but here he is a guy who sold drugs 1061 00:35:37,233 --> 00:35:39,100 he did some he was kind of in 1062 00:35:39,100 --> 00:35:42,833 he come to school just to flash and then he be gone 1063 00:35:42,833 --> 00:35:45,750 he come to school maybe once a week to flash his car 1064 00:35:45,750 --> 00:35:47,450 his jewelry his 1065 00:35:47,500 --> 00:35:48,933 and then he's gone a week 1066 00:35:49,100 --> 00:35:49,866 yeah two weeks 1067 00:35:49,866 --> 00:35:51,100 then he come back do it again 1068 00:35:51,100 --> 00:35:54,466 he just come in cause problems and leave yeah 1069 00:35:54,466 --> 00:35:54,983 but um 1070 00:35:54,983 --> 00:35:57,433 this particular day he came in and here he is 1071 00:35:57,433 --> 00:36:00,233 here I am the 4th 5th teacher that year 1072 00:36:00,233 --> 00:36:03,600 and he come into class and he started up with his mess 1073 00:36:03,866 --> 00:36:05,500 and I'm like no 1074 00:36:05,500 --> 00:36:06,933 no no no 1075 00:36:07,183 --> 00:36:07,983 no no 1076 00:36:08,266 --> 00:36:11,033 so I told him he had to stay after school with me 1077 00:36:11,033 --> 00:36:12,300 he's like you gotta be kidding 1078 00:36:12,300 --> 00:36:13,666 cause I'm putting structure on this guy 1079 00:36:13,666 --> 00:36:14,933 he's like what 1080 00:36:15,500 --> 00:36:17,283 and after school 1081 00:36:17,866 --> 00:36:20,133 um he knew my background 1082 00:36:20,150 --> 00:36:20,466 he you know 1083 00:36:20,466 --> 00:36:21,100 cause people like I'm 1084 00:36:21,100 --> 00:36:23,450 we got a former bingo working here and all of this 1085 00:36:23,750 --> 00:36:24,733 and um 1086 00:36:24,833 --> 00:36:27,683 he was the first person that I told my story 1087 00:36:28,100 --> 00:36:29,400 hey I'm adopted 1088 00:36:29,500 --> 00:36:30,633 hey I'm from 1089 00:36:30,633 --> 00:36:32,750 I'm you I'm from where you are 1090 00:36:32,750 --> 00:36:34,433 cause he start cause he was in class 1091 00:36:34,433 --> 00:36:36,150 you don't understand what I'm going through 1092 00:36:36,150 --> 00:36:36,583 oh yeah 1093 00:36:36,583 --> 00:36:37,383 I do 1094 00:36:37,866 --> 00:36:38,500 yes I do 1095 00:36:38,500 --> 00:36:39,666 very well yeah 1096 00:36:39,666 --> 00:36:42,450 so after school his name was Wyndham Parham 1097 00:36:43,300 --> 00:36:45,283 we had a long conversation 1098 00:36:45,466 --> 00:36:46,900 and it was one of those deals where 1099 00:36:46,900 --> 00:36:48,450 that laid everything out 1100 00:36:48,700 --> 00:36:53,100 the next day he was back at school and he told 1101 00:36:53,100 --> 00:36:54,466 and some people who act up 1102 00:36:54,466 --> 00:36:58,366 he turned around and said he was my guy who nah 1103 00:36:58,383 --> 00:37:00,250 I didn't have to enforce anymore 1104 00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:02,583 I got him because he he looking 1105 00:37:02,583 --> 00:37:05,150 at somebody who could give him something 1106 00:37:05,150 --> 00:37:07,100 because I came from the same circumstance 1107 00:37:07,100 --> 00:37:08,550 if not worse yeah 1108 00:37:08,550 --> 00:37:10,583 so he was the enforcer of the classroom 1109 00:37:10,583 --> 00:37:12,083 hey be quiet back there 1110 00:37:12,500 --> 00:37:13,783 wow what a 1111 00:37:13,783 --> 00:37:15,266 what a change yeah 1112 00:37:15,266 --> 00:37:17,033 he kind of and then I 1113 00:37:17,033 --> 00:37:18,866 he was one of the guys cause I was a football coach 1114 00:37:18,866 --> 00:37:20,900 then I wanted him to play football 1115 00:37:20,900 --> 00:37:25,433 so he came and play football and it changed his life 1116 00:37:25,433 --> 00:37:29,800 it changed his life it legitimately changed his life 1117 00:37:29,950 --> 00:37:31,200 from a guy who 1118 00:37:31,666 --> 00:37:33,700 probably wouldn't have lived too much longer 1119 00:37:33,700 --> 00:37:37,966 yeah to help get him a scholarship to college 1120 00:37:38,566 --> 00:37:41,583 and now he's like one of the top firefighter 1121 00:37:41,583 --> 00:37:43,933 I wrote his letter for him to get um 1122 00:37:44,100 --> 00:37:45,866 into the uh fire 1123 00:37:45,866 --> 00:37:46,100 the 1124 00:37:46,100 --> 00:37:49,750 what is the fire academy or whatever to be a fireman 1125 00:37:49,750 --> 00:37:52,150 and now he's been 20 years a fireman 1126 00:37:52,150 --> 00:37:53,033 family all 1127 00:37:53,033 --> 00:37:54,266 so all these different things 1128 00:37:54,266 --> 00:37:55,183 so my impact 1129 00:37:55,183 --> 00:37:58,000 I'm just using him as one that's really on a high level 1130 00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:00,066 but my whole goal there was 1131 00:38:00,066 --> 00:38:03,233 be impactful to the guys that I'm being around 1132 00:38:03,233 --> 00:38:04,066 I want to make a difference 1133 00:38:04,066 --> 00:38:06,766 so yes I end up coaching um 1134 00:38:07,150 --> 00:38:08,633 two weeks into the season 1135 00:38:08,633 --> 00:38:12,233 the head coach got fired and I become the head coach 1136 00:38:12,233 --> 00:38:14,933 I'm like I didn't even come here to coach man 1137 00:38:15,150 --> 00:38:16,700 and now I'm the head coach 1138 00:38:16,700 --> 00:38:17,500 right 1139 00:38:17,866 --> 00:38:19,750 but it was the ultimate blessing 1140 00:38:19,750 --> 00:38:20,783 man cause you may yes 1141 00:38:20,783 --> 00:38:22,300 I know football and different things 1142 00:38:22,300 --> 00:38:23,466 but where I wanted to 1143 00:38:23,466 --> 00:38:24,900 reach guys was just kind of the way 1144 00:38:24,900 --> 00:38:25,950 I was already doing it 1145 00:38:25,950 --> 00:38:28,050 but it gave me an additional technical 1146 00:38:28,366 --> 00:38:30,650 to help guys in a sport that I love 1147 00:38:30,783 --> 00:38:32,366 that basically gave me 1148 00:38:32,383 --> 00:38:34,700 a lot of the opportunities that I had in my life 1149 00:38:34,700 --> 00:38:38,450 so I'm the head coach I'm the 1150 00:38:38,783 --> 00:38:40,466 I was initially the English teacher 1151 00:38:40,466 --> 00:38:42,200 I became the head of a department 1152 00:38:42,266 --> 00:38:44,150 and I was the athletic director 1153 00:38:44,150 --> 00:38:46,200 so I did that for three years 1154 00:38:46,350 --> 00:38:48,166 and then I became the principal 1155 00:38:48,866 --> 00:38:50,000 so I became 1156 00:38:50,033 --> 00:38:52,550 I became the principal of the school because what it is 1157 00:38:52,550 --> 00:38:53,700 is it was a school within 1158 00:38:53,700 --> 00:38:56,500 it had like programs within the school yeah 1159 00:38:56,500 --> 00:38:58,333 so I created a a 1160 00:38:58,466 --> 00:39:02,133 I proposed a program called Sports Academy 1161 00:39:02,183 --> 00:39:03,583 which I'm still super proud of 1162 00:39:03,583 --> 00:39:06,050 it was called Sports Academy and I said look 1163 00:39:06,066 --> 00:39:10,650 I wanted to create curriculum based on sports 1164 00:39:11,033 --> 00:39:13,850 so I ran the program 1165 00:39:14,666 --> 00:39:16,983 um I got the guy who ran the school said look 1166 00:39:16,983 --> 00:39:19,183 you can get three other teachers 1167 00:39:19,183 --> 00:39:22,483 to round out your staff and 1168 00:39:23,066 --> 00:39:25,433 um and then get students to come in there 1169 00:39:25,433 --> 00:39:26,700 so I got a lot of the athletes 1170 00:39:26,700 --> 00:39:28,266 but I got you know 1171 00:39:28,266 --> 00:39:29,550 some other people too 1172 00:39:29,550 --> 00:39:31,700 but all the curriculum was based around sports 1173 00:39:31,700 --> 00:39:33,983 so when we read it wasn't a regular novel 1174 00:39:33,983 --> 00:39:38,233 we reading the autobiography of Jackie Robinson 1175 00:39:38,233 --> 00:39:39,333 and different things yeah 1176 00:39:39,350 --> 00:39:39,550 the the 1177 00:39:39,550 --> 00:39:45,033 the math was around sports themes sociology 1178 00:39:45,033 --> 00:39:48,083 I mean social studies was around sports themes 1179 00:39:48,783 --> 00:39:51,200 science was around sports stuff 1180 00:39:51,233 --> 00:39:54,783 so it was a way of tricking the guys like wow 1181 00:39:54,783 --> 00:39:56,383 we just coming in learning about sports 1182 00:39:56,383 --> 00:39:58,033 but no you learning about fractions 1183 00:39:58,033 --> 00:40:00,150 you learning about reading comprehension 1184 00:40:00,150 --> 00:40:01,300 you learning about chemistry 1185 00:40:01,300 --> 00:40:02,533 you learn about biology 1186 00:40:02,750 --> 00:40:05,466 so this program was phenomenal in our school 1187 00:40:05,466 --> 00:40:06,866 and that's when the guy who ran the school 1188 00:40:06,866 --> 00:40:08,083 he came in and said 1189 00:40:08,633 --> 00:40:11,966 if you can do what you did in this program 1190 00:40:12,150 --> 00:40:13,300 in the entire school 1191 00:40:13,300 --> 00:40:14,983 we'd have one of the best schools around 1192 00:40:14,983 --> 00:40:16,100 so I didn't know what he was getting at 1193 00:40:16,100 --> 00:40:18,650 he said I want you to run the whole school wow 1194 00:40:18,666 --> 00:40:20,800 so I became the principal 1195 00:40:21,866 --> 00:40:25,000 in July of whatever year that was 1196 00:40:25,433 --> 00:40:26,350 and I told him I said 1197 00:40:26,350 --> 00:40:27,783 you gotta let me coach this team now 1198 00:40:27,783 --> 00:40:29,283 I was the football coach I said 1199 00:40:29,350 --> 00:40:31,600 we this far let me finish this season 1200 00:40:31,666 --> 00:40:32,633 let me coach this season 1201 00:40:32,633 --> 00:40:35,933 so I coached that season as the principal 1202 00:40:36,666 --> 00:40:38,600 um I was the principal coaching the team 1203 00:40:38,700 --> 00:40:40,633 and then after the season um 1204 00:40:40,633 --> 00:40:43,183 you know I got another coach and then ironically 1205 00:40:43,183 --> 00:40:44,883 the guy who ran the school 1206 00:40:45,300 --> 00:40:47,450 who was a professor at Miami 1207 00:40:48,233 --> 00:40:50,583 we had a boxing team too okay 1208 00:40:50,583 --> 00:40:55,533 he was a boxer and he in December he died working out 1209 00:40:56,666 --> 00:40:57,500 he he passed away 1210 00:40:57,500 --> 00:41:01,166 so then I became the guy over everything 1211 00:41:01,550 --> 00:41:03,033 I'm like okay 1212 00:41:03,033 --> 00:41:04,650 I've only been the principal 1213 00:41:04,866 --> 00:41:06,933 I was the principal more for tone 1214 00:41:07,183 --> 00:41:10,483 and setting programs and kind of creating a culture 1215 00:41:10,883 --> 00:41:11,633 but now 1216 00:41:11,633 --> 00:41:15,383 I became the executive director of the entire school 1217 00:41:15,383 --> 00:41:18,133 so I was over everything so um 1218 00:41:18,266 --> 00:41:21,700 I did some switch UPS I made the school uniform 1219 00:41:21,700 --> 00:41:22,550 I said we hey 1220 00:41:22,550 --> 00:41:25,200 we gonna everybody wear uniforms I kind of boom 1221 00:41:25,333 --> 00:41:27,066 put my touches on it yeah 1222 00:41:27,066 --> 00:41:30,366 you know split the school into a split gender school 1223 00:41:30,433 --> 00:41:31,866 so I'm doing all these things 1224 00:41:31,866 --> 00:41:34,383 I wanted to be a better experience for the 1225 00:41:34,383 --> 00:41:35,500 for the students there 1226 00:41:35,500 --> 00:41:39,133 so I was really excited about that really excited um 1227 00:41:40,100 --> 00:41:41,300 we ready for the next phase 1228 00:41:41,300 --> 00:41:42,233 I am I want 1229 00:41:42,233 --> 00:41:44,350 I want to double click on something really fast 1230 00:41:44,350 --> 00:41:45,733 and you said that you 1231 00:41:45,783 --> 00:41:47,466 split the school into a split gender school 1232 00:41:47,466 --> 00:41:49,533 what does that mean and why did you decide to do that 1233 00:41:49,700 --> 00:41:50,633 well you know 1234 00:41:50,633 --> 00:41:51,783 I was just you know you 1235 00:41:51,783 --> 00:41:54,333 continue to look for ways to make the school better 1236 00:41:54,433 --> 00:41:54,783 you know 1237 00:41:54,783 --> 00:41:58,183 so I was looking at okay here's our population okay 1238 00:41:58,183 --> 00:41:59,750 we switched to uniforms 1239 00:41:59,750 --> 00:42:01,500 that was a huge step in the right direction 1240 00:42:01,500 --> 00:42:02,666 cause I was looking at 1241 00:42:02,666 --> 00:42:04,750 what are all the things that are prohibiting 1242 00:42:04,750 --> 00:42:06,166 guys from being successful 1243 00:42:06,350 --> 00:42:08,883 in our in our environment yeah okay 1244 00:42:09,033 --> 00:42:10,350 the whole thing of how you look 1245 00:42:10,350 --> 00:42:12,683 how you dress this my style 1246 00:42:12,950 --> 00:42:13,700 we're gonna eliminate that 1247 00:42:13,700 --> 00:42:15,433 everybody got the same thing on yep 1248 00:42:15,433 --> 00:42:16,900 you know because that was some of the things 1249 00:42:16,900 --> 00:42:18,550 when you went through and seeing why 1250 00:42:18,550 --> 00:42:19,750 when you were at school why this 1251 00:42:19,750 --> 00:42:22,000 why that'cause I don't want nobody to make fun of me 1252 00:42:22,050 --> 00:42:23,466 I can relate to that yeah 1253 00:42:23,466 --> 00:42:24,983 because I grew up I went to school yeah 1254 00:42:24,983 --> 00:42:27,850 I went to I had holes in the side of my pants 1255 00:42:27,950 --> 00:42:29,633 I had issues too you know 1256 00:42:29,633 --> 00:42:31,233 and I was in a uniform school 1257 00:42:31,233 --> 00:42:32,066 you know yeah 1258 00:42:32,066 --> 00:42:32,583 and and 1259 00:42:32,583 --> 00:42:33,233 but you know 1260 00:42:33,233 --> 00:42:36,900 whatever so that was one thing with the uniforms 1261 00:42:36,900 --> 00:42:39,433 and then the next thing with the split gender um 1262 00:42:39,433 --> 00:42:41,650 it was a guy named Dr Leonard Sacks 1263 00:42:42,233 --> 00:42:44,950 who I just put out a book called why Gender Matters 1264 00:42:44,950 --> 00:42:47,866 uh huh and it was an extensive um 1265 00:42:47,866 --> 00:42:52,950 publication on the advantages of split gender school 1266 00:42:52,950 --> 00:42:55,333 yeah and I was like 1267 00:42:55,433 --> 00:42:56,783 I love it yeah 1268 00:42:56,783 --> 00:42:57,900 I love it yeah 1269 00:42:57,900 --> 00:42:59,966 I love it because it talked about 1270 00:43:00,266 --> 00:43:02,583 especially for boys it's kind of interesting 1271 00:43:02,583 --> 00:43:04,300 we talk about raising raising men yeah 1272 00:43:04,300 --> 00:43:06,450 you know especially for the guys 1273 00:43:06,633 --> 00:43:09,000 the results were tremendous 1274 00:43:09,233 --> 00:43:12,050 because then I look back at our um 1275 00:43:12,150 --> 00:43:14,600 behavior referrals and different things like that 1276 00:43:14,633 --> 00:43:18,083 a lot of it centered around being masculine 1277 00:43:18,183 --> 00:43:20,550 in the wrong way in front of girls 1278 00:43:20,550 --> 00:43:22,066 yep so 1279 00:43:22,066 --> 00:43:24,050 we had a fight that happened in the room 1280 00:43:24,100 --> 00:43:26,983 because a guy says something to another guy 1281 00:43:26,983 --> 00:43:28,450 about a team that won 1282 00:43:29,150 --> 00:43:30,066 and he didn't oh 1283 00:43:30,066 --> 00:43:31,300 my team you know 1284 00:43:31,300 --> 00:43:32,966 beat your team yesterday 1285 00:43:33,183 --> 00:43:35,383 we talking about like pro sports 1286 00:43:35,383 --> 00:43:38,433 yeah and a guy felt slighted in front of a girl 1287 00:43:38,433 --> 00:43:39,850 in the back of him that he liked 1288 00:43:39,983 --> 00:43:41,700 so he had to say something back 1289 00:43:41,700 --> 00:43:42,966 and then you had this 1290 00:43:43,100 --> 00:43:45,183 so that's just one of a million examples in there 1291 00:43:45,183 --> 00:43:46,833 I said we can eliminate that 1292 00:43:46,833 --> 00:43:48,500 because we've all been in locker rooms 1293 00:43:48,500 --> 00:43:49,750 you don't have those issues 1294 00:43:49,750 --> 00:43:51,550 when it's just them guys in locker room no 1295 00:43:51,550 --> 00:43:53,633 you don't have it it's a locker room mentality 1296 00:43:53,633 --> 00:43:55,550 hey I'm not fighting this guy 1297 00:43:55,550 --> 00:43:56,350 we're good 1298 00:43:56,733 --> 00:44:00,183 so you create I created that circumstance in the school 1299 00:44:00,183 --> 00:44:01,966 put all the girls on the top floor 1300 00:44:02,433 --> 00:44:04,450 put all the boys on the bottom floor 1301 00:44:04,783 --> 00:44:07,350 and they went to lunch separate 1302 00:44:07,350 --> 00:44:09,033 everything was separate that's brilliant 1303 00:44:09,033 --> 00:44:13,350 and the the improvement for the guys was unreal 1304 00:44:13,350 --> 00:44:14,833 I mean it just took off 1305 00:44:14,833 --> 00:44:16,850 you had no more issues in the classroom 1306 00:44:16,866 --> 00:44:17,700 yeah you didn't 1307 00:44:17,700 --> 00:44:19,700 nobody was fighting because who you showing off for 1308 00:44:19,700 --> 00:44:21,033 nobody show off for it's just guys 1309 00:44:21,033 --> 00:44:22,166 we just say let's learn 1310 00:44:22,183 --> 00:44:23,433 and the same thing with the girls 1311 00:44:23,433 --> 00:44:24,266 so it was really good 1312 00:44:24,266 --> 00:44:26,050 so those were some of the things I wanted 1313 00:44:26,066 --> 00:44:28,483 that I really felt strong about 1314 00:44:28,483 --> 00:44:30,350 you know as well as some of the things we changed 1315 00:44:30,350 --> 00:44:32,333 as far as the graduation requirements 1316 00:44:32,466 --> 00:44:34,750 cause I had a lot of flexibility there and wow 1317 00:44:34,750 --> 00:44:37,050 put some really cool things in place 1318 00:44:37,266 --> 00:44:38,700 that really advanced the school 1319 00:44:38,700 --> 00:44:42,766 so I was there that school end up closing 1320 00:44:42,983 --> 00:44:44,983 um and then I went 1321 00:44:44,983 --> 00:44:49,200 and I was a principal at a elementary school okay 1322 00:44:49,266 --> 00:44:50,900 so that was a that was a cakewalk 1323 00:44:50,900 --> 00:44:51,700 you know I'm like okay 1324 00:44:51,700 --> 00:44:53,533 I came from the high school 1325 00:44:53,583 --> 00:44:56,900 high school with 1,000 kids to now it's an elementary 1326 00:44:56,900 --> 00:44:58,750 these are young elementary so 1327 00:44:58,750 --> 00:45:00,833 you know I went to this elementary school 1328 00:45:00,833 --> 00:45:02,233 and you had to wear a suit every day 1329 00:45:02,233 --> 00:45:05,066 which was fine I had to wear a navy blue suit sure 1330 00:45:05,066 --> 00:45:08,300 and either a a um a white shirt with a tie 1331 00:45:08,300 --> 00:45:09,866 or a powder blue shirt with a tie 1332 00:45:09,866 --> 00:45:10,233 I was like 1333 00:45:10,233 --> 00:45:12,833 I love that because when you talk about for me 1334 00:45:12,833 --> 00:45:16,366 kind of some themes and different things like that 1335 00:45:16,433 --> 00:45:17,933 when I was growing up 1336 00:45:17,950 --> 00:45:20,433 I didn't have stuff I didn't have those suits yeah 1337 00:45:20,433 --> 00:45:22,333 when I played football and you had to 1338 00:45:22,350 --> 00:45:23,466 we had to dress up for this 1339 00:45:23,466 --> 00:45:24,583 I dreaded that 1340 00:45:24,583 --> 00:45:27,500 when it was our graduation and and homecoming stuff 1341 00:45:27,500 --> 00:45:30,866 I dreaded I didn't have it was an embarrassment yeah 1342 00:45:30,866 --> 00:45:32,650 so as I kind of got older 1343 00:45:32,833 --> 00:45:34,500 you know and I kind of say this it's funny 1344 00:45:34,500 --> 00:45:36,233 I said this to somebody a couple days ago 1345 00:45:36,233 --> 00:45:40,366 I said every opportunity there is to be dressed up 1346 00:45:40,866 --> 00:45:42,100 I'm first in that line 1347 00:45:42,100 --> 00:45:44,650 take it and I'm gonna and I'm gonna be looking good 1348 00:45:45,500 --> 00:45:46,666 so that's one of the things that you 1349 00:45:46,666 --> 00:45:48,700 you talk about paying the purpose yeah 1350 00:45:48,700 --> 00:45:50,833 those things back in the day was painful oh 1351 00:45:50,833 --> 00:45:54,266 I'll be hey shoot I come in like I'm all over this 1352 00:45:54,266 --> 00:45:56,233 I got 60 suits sitting in there I'm like 1353 00:45:56,233 --> 00:45:57,833 I'm good I'm never gonna 1354 00:45:57,833 --> 00:46:00,066 I'm never gonna feel the way I felt 1355 00:46:00,066 --> 00:46:00,750 as far as the way 1356 00:46:00,750 --> 00:46:02,950 I presented myself and the way I looked ever again 1357 00:46:02,950 --> 00:46:03,700 so 1358 00:46:03,700 --> 00:46:05,666 those are some of the things I was really proud about 1359 00:46:05,666 --> 00:46:07,933 so went to this elementary school 1360 00:46:07,983 --> 00:46:09,583 did a really good job there 1361 00:46:09,583 --> 00:46:14,283 and what was a jump off to coaching is a nice segue 1362 00:46:15,233 --> 00:46:19,350 is at the high school although I was a principal 1363 00:46:19,350 --> 00:46:22,183 I still was the ad okay 1364 00:46:22,183 --> 00:46:24,900 so I still was involved we had a bunch of sports teams 1365 00:46:24,900 --> 00:46:25,666 yeah had yeah 1366 00:46:25,666 --> 00:46:27,100 three or four basketball teams 1367 00:46:27,100 --> 00:46:32,166 and so I was always that was something that 1368 00:46:32,666 --> 00:46:35,583 you know scratched that itch that I had yeah 1369 00:46:35,583 --> 00:46:36,500 yeah um 1370 00:46:36,500 --> 00:46:37,500 I was helping you know 1371 00:46:37,500 --> 00:46:40,050 I end up when we went to the elementary school 1372 00:46:41,033 --> 00:46:41,350 I'm 1373 00:46:41,350 --> 00:46:43,966 coming into that first year of the elementary school 1374 00:46:43,983 --> 00:46:48,300 I my oldest son was playing Pop Warner football 1375 00:46:48,300 --> 00:46:49,700 I went in with volunteering 1376 00:46:49,700 --> 00:46:51,550 helping with helping coach that 1377 00:46:51,550 --> 00:46:54,283 you know so but at the school 1378 00:46:54,383 --> 00:46:54,666 you know 1379 00:46:54,666 --> 00:46:56,383 I remember going to the lady who ran the school 1380 00:46:56,383 --> 00:46:57,366 and I said hey 1381 00:46:57,583 --> 00:47:00,266 I got all these contacts you know 1382 00:47:00,266 --> 00:47:02,466 in Cincinnati because I had all these teams 1383 00:47:02,466 --> 00:47:04,300 when I was at that other school yeah 1384 00:47:04,300 --> 00:47:07,233 I said let me let me just do a basketball team here 1385 00:47:07,233 --> 00:47:08,066 you know let me 1386 00:47:08,066 --> 00:47:11,100 I'm just trying to like man I'm and she said um 1387 00:47:11,100 --> 00:47:12,566 no she said no 1388 00:47:12,750 --> 00:47:15,350 we just an academic school here she was she was cool 1389 00:47:15,350 --> 00:47:15,833 she's like no 1390 00:47:15,833 --> 00:47:17,300 we we just an academic school 1391 00:47:17,300 --> 00:47:18,450 and at that point 1392 00:47:18,633 --> 00:47:21,733 my mind had jumped into some other things 1393 00:47:21,866 --> 00:47:23,966 because just to go back real quick 1394 00:47:24,233 --> 00:47:25,550 at the other school 1395 00:47:25,550 --> 00:47:27,483 we had a bunch of guys who got recruited 1396 00:47:27,866 --> 00:47:29,533 coaches would come through the school 1397 00:47:29,666 --> 00:47:32,800 and I remember a coach coming in and um 1398 00:47:33,550 --> 00:47:35,700 when I I would show him around the school first 1399 00:47:35,700 --> 00:47:38,350 cause I was really proud of what our school was before 1400 00:47:38,350 --> 00:47:39,800 I took him to the football coach 1401 00:47:40,150 --> 00:47:43,066 so I was walking him out afterwards and he turned 1402 00:47:43,066 --> 00:47:46,850 looked at me said you need to be coaching college 1403 00:47:47,433 --> 00:47:49,783 he said you'd be unbelievable 1404 00:47:49,783 --> 00:47:49,900 he said 1405 00:47:49,900 --> 00:47:52,550 I'm just looking at the way these guys respond to you 1406 00:47:52,550 --> 00:47:57,083 yeah you would be phenomenal in college football coach 1407 00:47:57,500 --> 00:47:58,566 and I'm like yeah 1408 00:47:58,783 --> 00:47:59,750 I wouldn't think I'm like 1409 00:47:59,750 --> 00:48:01,466 I never even really thought about it yeah 1410 00:48:01,466 --> 00:48:04,133 so fast forward to when she said we wasn't gonna do 1411 00:48:04,383 --> 00:48:04,833 she said no 1412 00:48:04,833 --> 00:48:09,100 I wanna do sports my mind was like okay 1413 00:48:09,100 --> 00:48:09,433 I'm ready 1414 00:48:09,433 --> 00:48:12,000 I wanna break off and do something in athletics 1415 00:48:13,350 --> 00:48:15,200 I think so many of us 1416 00:48:15,700 --> 00:48:19,200 who haven't had the kind of background that you have um 1417 00:48:19,466 --> 00:48:20,383 we end up achieving 1418 00:48:20,383 --> 00:48:21,900 some degree of success in some field 1419 00:48:21,900 --> 00:48:22,783 or something like that 1420 00:48:22,783 --> 00:48:25,883 and then we start to get scared of losing it 1421 00:48:26,783 --> 00:48:29,566 and you 1422 00:48:30,266 --> 00:48:31,633 I don't think you have that 1423 00:48:31,633 --> 00:48:33,500 I think that you've had to start over 1424 00:48:33,500 --> 00:48:34,933 so many times in your life 1425 00:48:35,433 --> 00:48:37,750 that if you need to start over 1426 00:48:37,750 --> 00:48:40,050 like every time you start over you go crush it 1427 00:48:40,183 --> 00:48:42,133 so alright I mean 1428 00:48:43,383 --> 00:48:47,850 like that gives you the courage to be like 1429 00:48:47,866 --> 00:48:49,633 no I want this other thing 1430 00:48:49,633 --> 00:48:50,966 I want to be a running back 1431 00:48:51,383 --> 00:48:55,050 so I'm not gonna I'm not gonna be a flanker 1432 00:48:55,150 --> 00:48:56,266 I'm gonna be a running back 1433 00:48:56,266 --> 00:48:58,966 and that's okay if I don't think I'm gonna fail 1434 00:48:59,633 --> 00:49:02,550 and then and then and here you go again 1435 00:49:02,550 --> 00:49:03,583 you've achieved like 1436 00:49:03,583 --> 00:49:05,833 all of this success and all this notoriety 1437 00:49:05,833 --> 00:49:07,666 and you've really made such an impact 1438 00:49:07,666 --> 00:49:09,600 exactly the way that you wanted to do 1439 00:49:09,900 --> 00:49:12,150 and then but you can't coach no 1440 00:49:12,150 --> 00:49:13,500 that's really not the recipe 1441 00:49:13,500 --> 00:49:16,683 so I'm just gonna blow up my life essentially 1442 00:49:16,900 --> 00:49:18,350 and go do something else 1443 00:49:18,350 --> 00:49:21,083 and to have the courage to do that 1444 00:49:21,500 --> 00:49:24,783 um after you've actually amassed some success 1445 00:49:24,783 --> 00:49:27,366 is tremendously rare 1446 00:49:28,033 --> 00:49:29,583 and that's really admirable 1447 00:49:29,583 --> 00:49:31,000 and it's really interesting 1448 00:49:31,633 --> 00:49:33,350 yeah it was it was as you know 1449 00:49:33,350 --> 00:49:35,433 cause I go into this field into education 1450 00:49:35,433 --> 00:49:37,900 I would that wasn't what my background was yeah 1451 00:49:37,900 --> 00:49:39,583 I subsequently get my you know 1452 00:49:39,583 --> 00:49:41,300 I get a master's in exercise science 1453 00:49:41,300 --> 00:49:43,366 when I'm running the sports academy thing 1454 00:49:43,433 --> 00:49:47,350 and then once the admin the lead administrator died 1455 00:49:47,350 --> 00:49:49,150 I had to get my principal certification 1456 00:49:49,150 --> 00:49:51,633 so I went got my masters in education 1457 00:49:51,633 --> 00:49:53,283 and got my principal certification 1458 00:49:53,300 --> 00:49:54,883 I gotta say along the way 1459 00:49:55,183 --> 00:49:56,866 obviously I got married yeah 1460 00:49:56,866 --> 00:49:58,900 I got four sons yeah 1461 00:49:58,900 --> 00:50:00,150 so that was my guys 1462 00:50:00,150 --> 00:50:02,350 those that's that's my that's my driving force 1463 00:50:02,350 --> 00:50:04,100 we'll get into the sons I can't wait to talk 1464 00:50:04,100 --> 00:50:05,266 so we get there yeah 1465 00:50:05,266 --> 00:50:06,866 we go get there so yeah 1466 00:50:06,866 --> 00:50:10,050 so I'm just excited about um 1467 00:50:10,233 --> 00:50:13,350 the opportunity and so it's now like okay 1468 00:50:13,350 --> 00:50:15,233 you you get to the end and now okay 1469 00:50:15,233 --> 00:50:16,850 how do I get into college football 1470 00:50:17,100 --> 00:50:19,800 so I happen to be talking to a guy who was a 1471 00:50:20,066 --> 00:50:21,983 that I use as a substitute teacher 1472 00:50:21,983 --> 00:50:23,483 when I was at the high school 1473 00:50:23,633 --> 00:50:26,233 I just happened to be randomly talking to him one day 1474 00:50:26,233 --> 00:50:26,866 and he told me 1475 00:50:26,866 --> 00:50:30,000 he was trying to get in the coaching at my Alma mater 1476 00:50:30,033 --> 00:50:31,850 Miami of Ohio right up the street 1477 00:50:32,266 --> 00:50:33,200 and um 1478 00:50:33,383 --> 00:50:34,100 he said yeah 1479 00:50:34,100 --> 00:50:36,500 he said I was up there and he said I didn't get the job 1480 00:50:36,500 --> 00:50:38,133 he said but I overheard 1481 00:50:38,866 --> 00:50:41,650 one of the administrators talking to the head coach 1482 00:50:42,033 --> 00:50:46,700 saying you need to get like an alumni on staff 1483 00:50:46,700 --> 00:50:47,783 like a you know 1484 00:50:47,783 --> 00:50:50,166 like one of the guys from the past really good players 1485 00:50:50,466 --> 00:50:53,600 and I said I know somebody that sounds familiar 1486 00:50:53,833 --> 00:50:56,650 that sounds familiar so I called him 1487 00:50:56,700 --> 00:50:58,033 you know I think I text him 1488 00:50:58,033 --> 00:51:00,233 I think I text the head coach yeah 1489 00:51:00,233 --> 00:51:02,433 I never met him before I just text him 1490 00:51:02,433 --> 00:51:03,466 hey Steven Mckella 1491 00:51:03,466 --> 00:51:05,883 I had to hit I said I'm in the hall of Fame there 1492 00:51:06,083 --> 00:51:07,333 you know um 1493 00:51:07,466 --> 00:51:10,266 you know I'd love to be considered to be on your staff 1494 00:51:10,266 --> 00:51:13,666 whatever so he called me the next day and he said 1495 00:51:13,666 --> 00:51:16,133 here's here's the job that I have 1496 00:51:16,233 --> 00:51:18,350 and back then these jobs are just start 1497 00:51:18,350 --> 00:51:20,100 they're rampant now but back then 1498 00:51:20,100 --> 00:51:22,033 this was 2,011 2,010 1499 00:51:22,033 --> 00:51:25,700 2,011 these what they call quality control jobs huh 1500 00:51:25,700 --> 00:51:27,466 so he called he said 1501 00:51:27,466 --> 00:51:29,400 I got a quality control job 1502 00:51:29,833 --> 00:51:31,550 and I'm like great 1503 00:51:31,550 --> 00:51:32,583 you know so here I go 1504 00:51:32,583 --> 00:51:39,766 I go from making $124,000 a year to making $521 a month 1505 00:51:40,633 --> 00:51:41,650 I'm going there 1506 00:51:43,033 --> 00:51:43,583 so so 1507 00:51:43,583 --> 00:51:45,050 oh man you know 1508 00:51:45,183 --> 00:51:46,750 definitely appreciative to my wife 1509 00:51:46,750 --> 00:51:48,666 my wife was a special ed teacher 1510 00:51:48,666 --> 00:51:50,300 we owned our home you know 1511 00:51:50,300 --> 00:51:51,350 we have you know 1512 00:51:51,350 --> 00:51:52,233 different things like that 1513 00:51:52,233 --> 00:51:54,383 so I told her I said look 1514 00:51:54,383 --> 00:51:54,550 and and 1515 00:51:54,550 --> 00:51:55,583 and you know 1516 00:51:55,583 --> 00:51:57,100 I appreciate her cause you know 1517 00:51:57,100 --> 00:51:57,750 I said look 1518 00:51:57,750 --> 00:51:59,050 this is something I wanna 1519 00:51:59,150 --> 00:52:01,250 are you okay with it she said well 1520 00:52:01,266 --> 00:52:02,633 you need to do this she said 1521 00:52:02,633 --> 00:52:05,433 because the last thing I want is 10 years from now 1522 00:52:05,433 --> 00:52:07,033 five years from now saying 1523 00:52:07,033 --> 00:52:07,583 I wish you 1524 00:52:07,583 --> 00:52:07,750 just 1525 00:52:07,750 --> 00:52:09,833 let me have an opportunity to go and try to do this 1526 00:52:09,833 --> 00:52:12,550 right so I went and did it 1527 00:52:12,550 --> 00:52:14,966 and here I am I'm getting coffee and running 1528 00:52:15,500 --> 00:52:16,566 you know running 1529 00:52:16,833 --> 00:52:19,066 you know making copies and stuff like that 1530 00:52:19,066 --> 00:52:20,266 and there's my picture on the 1531 00:52:20,266 --> 00:52:21,750 I'm on the stadium you know 1532 00:52:21,750 --> 00:52:22,833 this guy in the hall of Fame 1533 00:52:22,833 --> 00:52:24,300 and I'm I'm old now 1534 00:52:24,300 --> 00:52:26,183 I'm 38 39 years old 1535 00:52:26,183 --> 00:52:28,150 just getting into just getting into it 1536 00:52:28,150 --> 00:52:29,850 but I'm at my I'm a model yeah 1537 00:52:29,866 --> 00:52:31,133 so um 1538 00:52:31,983 --> 00:52:35,383 was really embracing not excited about that um 1539 00:52:35,383 --> 00:52:36,366 did that 1540 00:52:37,150 --> 00:52:38,500 um for one season 1541 00:52:38,500 --> 00:52:40,766 after that season the head coach 1542 00:52:41,583 --> 00:52:43,133 um took a job at Pitt 1543 00:52:43,583 --> 00:52:44,400 OK and um 1544 00:52:44,433 --> 00:52:45,666 you're at Pittsburgh yeah 1545 00:52:45,666 --> 00:52:46,066 and um 1546 00:52:46,066 --> 00:52:46,700 he said hey 1547 00:52:46,700 --> 00:52:47,900 you can come with me I said 1548 00:52:47,900 --> 00:52:49,850 to do what he said to be a uh 1549 00:52:49,866 --> 00:52:51,300 quality control I said nah 1550 00:52:51,300 --> 00:52:52,666 I'm not I'm not 1551 00:52:52,666 --> 00:52:54,933 I'm not doing that I'm not moving to do that 1552 00:52:55,066 --> 00:52:56,233 he said so what are you gonna do then 1553 00:52:56,233 --> 00:52:57,833 I said I'mma stay right here 1554 00:52:57,833 --> 00:53:01,600 and try to get on with the next coach here 1555 00:53:01,933 --> 00:53:03,783 or I'm just go back down the street 1556 00:53:03,783 --> 00:53:05,366 I got principal certification 1557 00:53:05,383 --> 00:53:07,783 and the school the elementary school I was at 1558 00:53:07,783 --> 00:53:09,250 they did not hire somebody 1559 00:53:09,300 --> 00:53:11,033 they have been especially near the end of the season 1560 00:53:11,033 --> 00:53:12,266 they was like you coming back 1561 00:53:12,266 --> 00:53:13,183 you coming back I said 1562 00:53:13,183 --> 00:53:16,350 I might just hold up let me hold up for a second 1563 00:53:16,350 --> 00:53:17,766 we know here in a couple weeks 1564 00:53:18,350 --> 00:53:22,250 and then the new coach happened to be who 1565 00:53:22,383 --> 00:53:25,983 the new coach that they hired at Miami was 1566 00:53:25,983 --> 00:53:27,300 my running back coach 1567 00:53:27,300 --> 00:53:29,433 after Sterman Smith left to go to Illinois 1568 00:53:29,433 --> 00:53:30,450 wow 1569 00:53:31,033 --> 00:53:33,233 and he hired me as a running back 1570 00:53:33,233 --> 00:53:35,250 small world he hired me as a running back coach 1571 00:53:35,550 --> 00:53:38,683 so again you get another opportunity to 1572 00:53:38,750 --> 00:53:40,683 show how you treat people 1573 00:53:40,866 --> 00:53:43,483 because if I was just a bad guy in his room 1574 00:53:43,700 --> 00:53:45,150 he wouldn't wanna hire me what 1575 00:53:45,150 --> 00:53:46,133 what am I hiring him for 1576 00:53:46,233 --> 00:53:47,350 I don't care if he's a good place 1577 00:53:47,350 --> 00:53:48,833 a bad guy that's right 1578 00:53:48,833 --> 00:53:50,350 I don't wanna hire him as a coach 1579 00:53:50,350 --> 00:53:52,600 he said there's no way I don't hire you as a coach 1580 00:53:53,066 --> 00:53:56,666 so I'm a coach for what I'm a I'm a mother and I said 1581 00:53:56,666 --> 00:53:57,550 you can't tell me anything 1582 00:53:57,550 --> 00:53:59,850 I'm on the Mountain Top of everything yep 1583 00:54:00,150 --> 00:54:02,600 coaching running backs at my Alma mater 1584 00:54:02,700 --> 00:54:05,766 and that lasted for one month hahaha 1585 00:54:06,300 --> 00:54:08,350 so for this movie that we're 1586 00:54:08,350 --> 00:54:10,250 we're talking about a movie right now yeah 1587 00:54:10,500 --> 00:54:12,233 and I know I know something's coming 1588 00:54:12,233 --> 00:54:15,733 it's either gonna be amazing or it's gonna suck 1589 00:54:15,833 --> 00:54:17,633 like something is something is what 1590 00:54:17,633 --> 00:54:18,633 which is it which is it 1591 00:54:18,633 --> 00:54:22,633 I gotta know so let's go back in time alright 1592 00:54:22,633 --> 00:54:24,766 let's go back around five years 1593 00:54:24,833 --> 00:54:26,850 to flashback to that coach 1594 00:54:27,183 --> 00:54:27,466 who 1595 00:54:27,466 --> 00:54:30,066 we walking out of the school where I was the principal 1596 00:54:30,066 --> 00:54:31,783 and he turned back around and said 1597 00:54:31,783 --> 00:54:33,583 you'd kill it in coaching man 1598 00:54:33,583 --> 00:54:35,166 you should consider being a coach 1599 00:54:35,700 --> 00:54:36,733 that coach 1600 00:54:37,350 --> 00:54:40,766 had now become the head coach at Indiana University 1601 00:54:42,100 --> 00:54:44,183 and that coach I never told you this 1602 00:54:44,183 --> 00:54:47,550 that coach was also on the staff at Miami 1603 00:54:47,550 --> 00:54:48,766 when I was a player 1604 00:54:49,383 --> 00:54:50,266 wow awesome 1605 00:54:50,266 --> 00:54:54,400 so here he is now he's the head coach at Indiana 1606 00:54:54,983 --> 00:55:00,150 and here I am just getting in the coaching and he said 1607 00:55:00,150 --> 00:55:00,950 he called he said 1608 00:55:00,950 --> 00:55:02,650 I don't wanna hire you 1609 00:55:03,100 --> 00:55:06,233 because the guy who was the head coach at Miami 1610 00:55:06,233 --> 00:55:07,950 they were on the same staff at Miami 1611 00:55:07,950 --> 00:55:08,900 he's like I don't you know 1612 00:55:08,900 --> 00:55:09,700 I went to Miami he's like 1613 00:55:09,700 --> 00:55:11,733 I don't wanna do this to Miami yeah 1614 00:55:11,750 --> 00:55:13,983 he said give me another few days 1615 00:55:13,983 --> 00:55:16,383 I'm doing everything I can to avoid hiring you 1616 00:55:16,383 --> 00:55:17,900 I'm trying not to hire you 1617 00:55:17,900 --> 00:55:19,533 I don't wanna have to hire you 1618 00:55:19,833 --> 00:55:21,583 and then he called he said 1619 00:55:21,583 --> 00:55:22,866 I need the I need you 1620 00:55:22,866 --> 00:55:24,100 I gotta I gotta do it 1621 00:55:24,100 --> 00:55:28,000 so I went to Indiana and um 1622 00:55:28,983 --> 00:55:30,983 I was there the next six years 1623 00:55:30,983 --> 00:55:32,500 we were you know 1624 00:55:32,500 --> 00:55:35,166 it was phenomenal what happened there 1625 00:55:35,183 --> 00:55:37,366 and all of the background that I had 1626 00:55:37,833 --> 00:55:39,666 as a school administrator 1627 00:55:39,666 --> 00:55:42,383 as a teacher obviously as a mentor 1628 00:55:42,383 --> 00:55:46,350 all these things like I had perfected in my 1629 00:55:46,350 --> 00:55:48,583 and that's not perfected I felt really 1630 00:55:48,583 --> 00:55:49,266 really really 1631 00:55:49,266 --> 00:55:53,166 really good over any of my contemporaries in recruiting 1632 00:55:53,500 --> 00:55:56,033 selling a product different things like that 1633 00:55:56,033 --> 00:55:58,650 because of what I did at that school for seven years 1634 00:55:58,950 --> 00:56:00,666 so here I am going out recruiting 1635 00:56:00,666 --> 00:56:02,266 I'm like I had to recruit 1636 00:56:02,266 --> 00:56:03,666 to get people to come to a school 1637 00:56:03,666 --> 00:56:06,850 that people thought was a school of bad kids yeah 1638 00:56:07,066 --> 00:56:09,766 so you better believe I can get them to come to Indiana 1639 00:56:09,833 --> 00:56:10,583 haha yeah 1640 00:56:10,583 --> 00:56:13,183 I can go out and recruit do different things like that 1641 00:56:13,183 --> 00:56:15,150 and form genuine relationships 1642 00:56:15,150 --> 00:56:16,033 cause don't forget 1643 00:56:16,033 --> 00:56:19,400 my driving force before I got in coaching 1644 00:56:19,433 --> 00:56:22,666 was to help kids help guys see their full potential 1645 00:56:22,666 --> 00:56:24,300 to form relationships yeah 1646 00:56:24,300 --> 00:56:27,200 to be something to guys that I didn't have growing up 1647 00:56:27,266 --> 00:56:28,900 so that was to to this moment 1648 00:56:28,900 --> 00:56:30,433 that's my driving thing so 1649 00:56:30,433 --> 00:56:32,366 a lot of success recruiting 1650 00:56:32,500 --> 00:56:34,483 a lot of success coaching 1651 00:56:34,700 --> 00:56:36,450 you know coaching running backs 1652 00:56:36,833 --> 00:56:38,183 doing very well there so 1653 00:56:38,183 --> 00:56:40,466 I was there six years I was there yeah 1654 00:56:40,466 --> 00:56:42,200 I was at Indiana six years 1655 00:56:42,383 --> 00:56:45,033 and then I went to university of Southern California 1656 00:56:45,033 --> 00:56:47,133 same thing great success 1657 00:56:47,583 --> 00:56:48,666 you know with 1658 00:56:48,666 --> 00:56:50,733 on the field and off the field 1659 00:56:51,550 --> 00:56:54,083 and then I went to the Kansas City Chiefs 1660 00:56:54,350 --> 00:56:56,700 I was with the Kansas City Chiefs for three years 1661 00:56:56,700 --> 00:56:58,266 we went to the Super Bowl twice 1662 00:56:58,266 --> 00:57:02,383 we won the Super Bowl and then after Kansas City um 1663 00:57:02,383 --> 00:57:04,833 I came back to college football 1664 00:57:04,833 --> 00:57:06,333 cause I wanted to be a head coach 1665 00:57:07,100 --> 00:57:07,350 um 1666 00:57:07,350 --> 00:57:10,000 I felt like my trajectory was headed in that direction 1667 00:57:10,100 --> 00:57:11,433 I came back and 1668 00:57:11,433 --> 00:57:13,866 I was the associate head coach at Indiana 1669 00:57:13,866 --> 00:57:16,683 for one season then I went to Notre Dame 1670 00:57:16,866 --> 00:57:18,750 you know I would never thought I'd be at Notre Dame 1671 00:57:18,750 --> 00:57:20,683 I went to Notre Dame coached at Notre Dame 1672 00:57:20,833 --> 00:57:22,800 I was the associate head coach there 1673 00:57:22,833 --> 00:57:26,583 had phenomenal success there as a team 1674 00:57:26,583 --> 00:57:29,350 and as a position group and then this month 1675 00:57:29,350 --> 00:57:31,300 this past season um 1676 00:57:31,300 --> 00:57:33,466 with Los Vegas Raiders so 1677 00:57:33,466 --> 00:57:35,783 my whole thing with the NFL stuff was I said look 1678 00:57:35,783 --> 00:57:38,566 I coach for a hall of Fame offensive coach 1679 00:57:38,750 --> 00:57:42,666 and Andy Reed in the draw to come back to the NFL 1680 00:57:42,666 --> 00:57:44,500 cause it was a bunch of I probably had 10 1681 00:57:44,500 --> 00:57:46,466 12 opportunities to come back to the NFL 1682 00:57:46,466 --> 00:57:48,250 after I initially left yeah 1683 00:57:48,900 --> 00:57:51,800 you know to come back and be under Pete Carroll 1684 00:57:52,550 --> 00:57:55,783 who was a who will be a hall of Fame head coach 1685 00:57:55,783 --> 00:57:57,683 but he's a defensive he's on the 1686 00:57:57,750 --> 00:58:00,633 he's a defensive mind your coach yeah 1687 00:58:00,633 --> 00:58:02,350 so to me it was all hey 1688 00:58:02,350 --> 00:58:02,900 what is some of 1689 00:58:02,900 --> 00:58:04,900 a lot of these things I can do that's gonna 1690 00:58:04,900 --> 00:58:07,166 ultimately make me a better head coach 1691 00:58:07,350 --> 00:58:09,783 so these different experiences all contributed to that 1692 00:58:09,783 --> 00:58:12,150 so bring me where I am now 1693 00:58:12,150 --> 00:58:13,483 you know here I am 1694 00:58:13,700 --> 00:58:15,450 been married 25 years 1695 00:58:16,383 --> 00:58:18,950 got four sons you know 26 1696 00:58:18,950 --> 00:58:23,983 23 21 and 9 1697 00:58:23,983 --> 00:58:26,283 wow what a range 1698 00:58:26,433 --> 00:58:29,233 yes and so I 1699 00:58:29,233 --> 00:58:33,000 I get this question a lot is 1700 00:58:34,350 --> 00:58:35,683 is that too many sons 1701 00:58:36,700 --> 00:58:37,700 would you have more if you 1702 00:58:37,700 --> 00:58:38,583 if you could if you 1703 00:58:38,583 --> 00:58:40,583 if you could be I 1704 00:58:40,583 --> 00:58:43,700 I feel like I do because one of my things that 1705 00:58:43,700 --> 00:58:45,666 that Coach Smith had always said 1706 00:58:45,666 --> 00:58:47,933 and then I carried in my coaching is 1707 00:58:48,050 --> 00:58:48,700 and I every 1708 00:58:48,700 --> 00:58:51,100 every room I go into I say the same thing 1709 00:58:51,100 --> 00:58:52,583 you may not be looking for a father 1710 00:58:52,583 --> 00:58:54,083 but I'mma treat you like you my son 1711 00:58:54,900 --> 00:58:57,183 and he said that to you he said 1712 00:58:57,183 --> 00:58:58,866 he said that to me a long 1713 00:58:58,866 --> 00:59:00,566 long time ago yeah 1714 00:59:00,633 --> 00:59:02,666 and then you know I 1715 00:59:02,666 --> 00:59:05,133 after some things we'll get into here shortly 1716 00:59:05,300 --> 00:59:06,950 that came back up yeah 1717 00:59:06,950 --> 00:59:10,166 and I said I haven't been using that phrase 1718 00:59:10,233 --> 00:59:11,950 but my actions yeah 1719 00:59:11,950 --> 00:59:13,433 that's how it was with all the 1720 00:59:13,433 --> 00:59:16,066 with all of the males with females too 1721 00:59:16,066 --> 00:59:18,233 yeah but the males you know 1722 00:59:18,233 --> 00:59:19,400 obviously I coach 1723 00:59:19,433 --> 00:59:21,900 that was that was my thing with those guys 1724 00:59:21,900 --> 00:59:22,966 I really 1725 00:59:23,033 --> 00:59:25,900 those relationships and how I treated those guys and 1726 00:59:25,900 --> 00:59:28,000 and different things that was very important to me 1727 00:59:28,000 --> 00:59:29,383 so what what's your relationship with 1728 00:59:29,383 --> 00:59:32,133 with Coach Smith Coach Smith Ben 1729 00:59:32,300 --> 00:59:33,833 all this time since you know 1730 00:59:33,833 --> 00:59:36,583 you left Ohio are you staying in touch with him 1731 00:59:36,583 --> 00:59:37,833 are you staying in touch with him for years right 1732 00:59:37,833 --> 00:59:38,666 what how's that going 1733 00:59:38,666 --> 00:59:39,266 so I 1734 00:59:39,266 --> 00:59:41,666 so I talk to him a lot you know 1735 00:59:41,666 --> 00:59:43,183 talk to him all the time when I 1736 00:59:43,183 --> 00:59:46,250 when I went to the NFL so I'm with the Bengals 1737 00:59:46,466 --> 00:59:48,983 he was at that point at that time 1738 00:59:48,983 --> 00:59:50,600 the coach of the Houston Oilers 1739 00:59:51,033 --> 00:59:52,683 so we kind of reconnected 1740 00:59:53,500 --> 00:59:54,433 um on the field 1741 00:59:54,433 --> 00:59:56,283 cause I was hurt then but me and him spent 1742 00:59:56,300 --> 00:59:58,066 we had a great conversation then 1743 00:59:58,066 --> 00:59:59,033 we talked over the years 1744 00:59:59,033 --> 01:00:01,266 he was on my resume as a reference 1745 01:00:01,266 --> 01:00:02,433 yeah always talking 1746 01:00:02,433 --> 01:00:04,000 always talking always talking 1747 01:00:04,150 --> 01:00:05,150 and I did skip a part 1748 01:00:05,150 --> 01:00:06,433 but it's interesting you bring it up 1749 01:00:06,433 --> 01:00:08,333 so in 2,014 1750 01:00:08,383 --> 01:00:09,500 I was of course 1751 01:00:09,500 --> 01:00:12,083 I'm the running back coach at Indiana University 1752 01:00:12,350 --> 01:00:14,150 and Coach Smith I called and said 1753 01:00:14,150 --> 01:00:15,766 he's the he's now he 1754 01:00:15,833 --> 01:00:16,033 you know 1755 01:00:16,033 --> 01:00:18,450 he was a running back coach in the NFL for 21 years 1756 01:00:18,583 --> 01:00:21,050 so he calls me and says hey 1757 01:00:21,583 --> 01:00:24,866 um you wanna do an internship in Seattle 1758 01:00:24,866 --> 01:00:27,000 he was a running back coach of Seattle Seahawks 1759 01:00:27,033 --> 01:00:27,550 I'm like yeah 1760 01:00:27,550 --> 01:00:30,183 that'd be great so I 1761 01:00:30,183 --> 01:00:33,066 go down and just for some other reference 1762 01:00:33,066 --> 01:00:34,900 let me go backwards to go forward real quick 1763 01:00:34,900 --> 01:00:36,683 like even when we at Miami like 1764 01:00:36,800 --> 01:00:37,783 you know people 1765 01:00:37,783 --> 01:00:38,833 we're both from Youngstown 1766 01:00:38,833 --> 01:00:39,783 and people used to always say 1767 01:00:39,783 --> 01:00:41,666 you guys look alike that was like the running joke 1768 01:00:41,666 --> 01:00:42,500 yeah you guys look alike 1769 01:00:42,500 --> 01:00:43,633 you guys look alike get up 1770 01:00:43,633 --> 01:00:44,866 you know alright 1771 01:00:44,866 --> 01:00:47,066 so fast forward a bunch of years 1772 01:00:47,066 --> 01:00:50,483 that was in 1990 here it is 2,014 yeah 1773 01:00:50,633 --> 01:00:52,900 we're over here with with the Seahawks 1774 01:00:52,900 --> 01:00:54,933 and I never forget Pete was in um 1775 01:00:55,033 --> 01:00:57,983 we were in a staff meeting and Pete was doing his thing 1776 01:00:57,983 --> 01:00:58,700 and he kind of looked over 1777 01:00:58,700 --> 01:00:59,700 he said you know what 1778 01:00:59,700 --> 01:01:01,433 something's going on with you two guys man 1779 01:01:01,433 --> 01:01:02,433 it was like he said 1780 01:01:02,433 --> 01:01:04,400 we're sitting there watching you guys at practice 1781 01:01:04,633 --> 01:01:06,100 and you guys walking alike 1782 01:01:06,100 --> 01:01:09,150 pointing alike and we both kind of laugh it off 1783 01:01:09,150 --> 01:01:11,300 like whatever I said yeah 1784 01:01:11,300 --> 01:01:13,183 I don't know we're from the same hometown or whatever 1785 01:01:13,183 --> 01:01:14,066 he's like they're like nah 1786 01:01:14,066 --> 01:01:15,133 you guys yeah 1787 01:01:15,550 --> 01:01:16,950 it's too much stuff to similar man 1788 01:01:16,950 --> 01:01:18,583 but it's kind of fishy 1789 01:01:18,583 --> 01:01:20,233 like it ain't nobody thinking that 1790 01:01:20,233 --> 01:01:21,700 kind of laughed it off and kept moving 1791 01:01:21,700 --> 01:01:24,183 but yeah so through all those years always 1792 01:01:24,183 --> 01:01:26,833 you know was always in touch with Coach Smith 1793 01:01:26,833 --> 01:01:27,700 yes yeah 1794 01:01:27,700 --> 01:01:28,550 I love that well 1795 01:01:28,550 --> 01:01:31,833 so in 2,017 you embarked 1796 01:01:31,833 --> 01:01:32,900 some laws changed 1797 01:01:32,900 --> 01:01:35,066 and you decided to embark on a mission 1798 01:01:35,066 --> 01:01:36,966 to find your biological parents right 1799 01:01:37,183 --> 01:01:38,850 yes tell me about how that went 1800 01:01:39,350 --> 01:01:40,700 so I'd always you know 1801 01:01:40,700 --> 01:01:42,733 I'd always wonder you know 1802 01:01:42,783 --> 01:01:45,300 you know my deep voice is just whatever 1803 01:01:45,300 --> 01:01:46,950 you know you as you kind of get older 1804 01:01:46,950 --> 01:01:48,183 you wonder where those things came from 1805 01:01:48,183 --> 01:01:50,400 and I know I've said it's been pretty well chronicled 1806 01:01:50,783 --> 01:01:52,000 you know coming up 1807 01:01:52,583 --> 01:01:54,850 did I wonder yes 1808 01:01:54,866 --> 01:01:56,700 did I want to actively pursue it 1809 01:01:56,700 --> 01:01:58,450 was too many things going on 1810 01:01:58,466 --> 01:02:00,350 of much more importance in my life 1811 01:02:00,350 --> 01:02:01,783 yeah then telling my mom 1812 01:02:01,783 --> 01:02:02,666 I know hey 1813 01:02:02,666 --> 01:02:04,066 there's a lot of stuff going on here 1814 01:02:04,066 --> 01:02:06,233 we got this that we you know 1815 01:02:06,233 --> 01:02:08,033 we got these other financial struggles 1816 01:02:08,033 --> 01:02:08,666 but you know what 1817 01:02:08,666 --> 01:02:10,666 we need to go and find my biological family 1818 01:02:10,666 --> 01:02:12,233 it's not happening that's not 1819 01:02:12,233 --> 01:02:14,866 that's not the priority I wouldn't even bring it up 1820 01:02:14,866 --> 01:02:16,833 you know and it wasn't really a priority yes 1821 01:02:16,833 --> 01:02:19,283 I wondered but it wasn't so much that I'm gonna 1822 01:02:19,533 --> 01:02:21,800 you know make a huge thing about it 1823 01:02:21,950 --> 01:02:23,433 but as I got older I started have 1824 01:02:23,433 --> 01:02:25,183 you know start having my sons yeah 1825 01:02:25,183 --> 01:02:26,466 you know um 1826 01:02:26,466 --> 01:02:27,183 start having you know 1827 01:02:27,183 --> 01:02:29,466 and you go in there and shoot the doctor say 1828 01:02:29,466 --> 01:02:30,883 give us your family history 1829 01:02:31,150 --> 01:02:33,583 you know that started ringing hard yeah 1830 01:02:33,583 --> 01:02:35,300 I get to my fourth guy man 1831 01:02:35,300 --> 01:02:36,266 what I don't know 1832 01:02:36,266 --> 01:02:38,283 you know so 1833 01:02:38,466 --> 01:02:39,666 you know I seem to 1834 01:02:39,666 --> 01:02:42,383 I was in more of a headspace to wanna find out 1835 01:02:42,383 --> 01:02:45,033 uh huh and then my adopted mom 1836 01:02:45,033 --> 01:02:47,500 she had told me that in Ohio 1837 01:02:47,500 --> 01:02:51,000 the laws had opened up adoption records 1838 01:02:51,150 --> 01:02:53,233 that right there was the jump off yeah 1839 01:02:53,233 --> 01:02:57,566 because then I called um the agency on Ohio and um 1840 01:02:57,583 --> 01:02:58,100 they said well 1841 01:02:58,100 --> 01:02:59,450 you weren't born in Ohio 1842 01:03:00,266 --> 01:03:01,183 I'm like oh yeah 1843 01:03:01,183 --> 01:03:02,066 cause I I 1844 01:03:02,066 --> 01:03:02,266 you know 1845 01:03:02,266 --> 01:03:04,833 I knew that I was born once I found out I was adopted 1846 01:03:04,833 --> 01:03:07,233 this was way back when I was like 6 or 7 yeah 1847 01:03:07,233 --> 01:03:08,233 I that I was born in 1848 01:03:08,233 --> 01:03:10,183 I knew I always knew I was born in Pittsburgh 1849 01:03:10,183 --> 01:03:11,583 got it even before I knew I was adopted 1850 01:03:11,583 --> 01:03:12,266 I just assumed 1851 01:03:12,266 --> 01:03:14,383 cause Pittsburgh is only like an hour from Youngstown 1852 01:03:14,383 --> 01:03:16,450 right I just assumed my parents were in Pittsburgh 1853 01:03:16,600 --> 01:03:17,950 my mom had me in Pittsburgh yeah 1854 01:03:17,950 --> 01:03:19,466 that's where the hospital happened to be yeah 1855 01:03:19,466 --> 01:03:20,100 that's where the hospital 1856 01:03:20,100 --> 01:03:20,983 that's where I happen to be 1857 01:03:20,983 --> 01:03:23,833 you know but come to find out no 1858 01:03:23,833 --> 01:03:24,633 you know I was adopted 1859 01:03:24,633 --> 01:03:27,366 that's where so um 1860 01:03:28,266 --> 01:03:32,166 there was a law so in in Ohio you can get the records 1861 01:03:32,383 --> 01:03:33,700 but my records weren't in Ohio 1862 01:03:33,700 --> 01:03:36,166 that's what that wasn't where I was born yeah 1863 01:03:36,300 --> 01:03:40,700 so I started digging and found out in Pennsylvania 1864 01:03:40,700 --> 01:03:43,333 I knew I was born in Pennsylvania um 1865 01:03:43,383 --> 01:03:44,550 that in Pennsylvania 1866 01:03:44,550 --> 01:03:46,266 there was a law that was going through 1867 01:03:46,266 --> 01:03:51,750 that was in process so that brings us to 2,017 2,017 1868 01:03:51,750 --> 01:03:54,150 I'm at USC I just got there 1869 01:03:54,150 --> 01:03:55,750 I'm waiting for like we 1870 01:03:55,750 --> 01:03:56,466 in the house 1871 01:03:56,466 --> 01:03:58,566 and our furniture and stuff was getting delivered 1872 01:03:58,783 --> 01:04:00,233 and I just jumped on my phone 1873 01:04:00,233 --> 01:04:01,350 cause I would just Google 1874 01:04:01,350 --> 01:04:02,100 it was I think it was 1875 01:04:02,100 --> 01:04:02,750 there was a house Bill 1876 01:04:02,750 --> 01:04:04,500 I can't remember what house Bill it was now 1877 01:04:04,500 --> 01:04:07,533 House Bill 78 or whatever it was 1878 01:04:07,750 --> 01:04:08,983 so there was a house Bill 1879 01:04:08,983 --> 01:04:10,983 and I would just Google it and see what's going on 1880 01:04:10,983 --> 01:04:12,766 and I googled it that day 1881 01:04:12,866 --> 01:04:14,350 and that day it had showed 1882 01:04:14,350 --> 01:04:15,900 it had just went through wow 1883 01:04:15,900 --> 01:04:17,333 I'm like oh shoot 1884 01:04:17,833 --> 01:04:22,666 so I called whatever the department was in Pennsylvania 1885 01:04:22,666 --> 01:04:23,583 and they said yes 1886 01:04:23,583 --> 01:04:24,700 it went through and I said 1887 01:04:24,700 --> 01:04:26,533 what do I need to do to get my stuff 1888 01:04:26,983 --> 01:04:28,150 and they told me 1889 01:04:28,150 --> 01:04:31,100 so I did the little application and I sent it off 1890 01:04:31,100 --> 01:04:32,183 and I didn't think about 1891 01:04:32,183 --> 01:04:33,833 I completely forgot that was March 1892 01:04:33,833 --> 01:04:37,666 yeah it wasn't till November of 2,017 1893 01:04:37,666 --> 01:04:39,083 that I was in my office 1894 01:04:39,750 --> 01:04:43,433 and it just hit me that day like 1895 01:04:43,433 --> 01:04:45,583 I wonder what's going on with this adoption paperwork 1896 01:04:45,583 --> 01:04:47,066 mmm hmm like that day 1897 01:04:47,066 --> 01:04:47,466 it hit me 1898 01:04:47,466 --> 01:04:49,150 I wonder what's going on with adoption paperwork 1899 01:04:49,150 --> 01:04:51,983 so I remember calling that department 1900 01:04:51,983 --> 01:04:52,783 yeah the lady didn't 1901 01:04:52,783 --> 01:04:54,866 nobody answered I'm like okay 1902 01:04:54,866 --> 01:04:56,966 I go home and when I get home 1903 01:04:57,150 --> 01:04:59,100 this is the paperwork is there 1904 01:04:59,100 --> 01:05:00,433 wow it literally 1905 01:05:00,433 --> 01:05:02,733 that day it was there 1906 01:05:02,983 --> 01:05:03,833 so I opened it up 1907 01:05:03,833 --> 01:05:05,950 and it was called your original birth record 1908 01:05:05,950 --> 01:05:07,300 which is basically like your birth certificate 1909 01:05:07,300 --> 01:05:08,350 it was one piece of paper 1910 01:05:08,350 --> 01:05:12,266 yeah I opened it up and it said um 1911 01:05:12,266 --> 01:05:14,050 it had on there um 1912 01:05:14,150 --> 01:05:18,550 what my name was which I wasn't expecting that yeah 1913 01:05:18,550 --> 01:05:20,800 it had on there John Kenneth Briggs 1914 01:05:20,950 --> 01:05:23,150 wow and it had my mom's name on there 1915 01:05:23,150 --> 01:05:25,350 and I and my adopted mom had always told me 1916 01:05:25,350 --> 01:05:26,233 she said she said 1917 01:05:26,233 --> 01:05:27,633 I don't know a whole lot about you 1918 01:05:27,633 --> 01:05:28,666 but your your 1919 01:05:28,666 --> 01:05:29,783 I knew your parents were young 1920 01:05:29,783 --> 01:05:31,350 and it had my mom's name on there 1921 01:05:31,350 --> 01:05:32,666 yeah and it had her age 1922 01:05:32,666 --> 01:05:33,983 she was 16 when she had me 1923 01:05:33,983 --> 01:05:34,783 I'm like wow 1924 01:05:34,783 --> 01:05:36,533 I'm just blown away yeah 1925 01:05:36,550 --> 01:05:38,550 so I jump on Facebook 1926 01:05:38,550 --> 01:05:40,183 I don't know what made me go Facebook 1927 01:05:40,183 --> 01:05:41,466 you know and I like 1928 01:05:41,466 --> 01:05:43,383 I'm trying to find her yeah 1929 01:05:43,383 --> 01:05:45,700 you know and with none of these other things I 1930 01:05:45,700 --> 01:05:48,100 I bring this up probably every fourth or fifth time 1931 01:05:48,100 --> 01:05:49,250 I tell this story 1932 01:05:50,150 --> 01:05:52,650 there because I was born in Pennsylvania 1933 01:05:53,066 --> 01:05:54,983 I did my search in Pennsylvania 1934 01:05:54,983 --> 01:05:55,783 of course and I don't know 1935 01:05:55,783 --> 01:05:58,233 I don't even know what search criteria I used 1936 01:05:58,233 --> 01:06:00,350 i'mma be honest with you I'm on Facebook 1937 01:06:00,350 --> 01:06:01,350 and that night 1938 01:06:01,350 --> 01:06:06,800 I found another person that wasn't my mom 1939 01:06:07,183 --> 01:06:08,933 who was in Pennsylvania 1940 01:06:09,900 --> 01:06:13,166 had the same name and was the age 1941 01:06:13,383 --> 01:06:14,433 everything fit now 1942 01:06:14,433 --> 01:06:15,866 I'm looking on her Facebook page 1943 01:06:15,866 --> 01:06:17,700 I'm like she don't necessarily look like me 1944 01:06:17,700 --> 01:06:21,200 yeah but there was so many people of that set 1945 01:06:21,266 --> 01:06:23,900 like her Facebook friends had to be like nieces 1946 01:06:23,900 --> 01:06:24,700 nephews whatever 1947 01:06:24,700 --> 01:06:25,466 and I'm like okay 1948 01:06:25,466 --> 01:06:26,833 I'm somewhere in that spectrum 1949 01:06:26,833 --> 01:06:27,500 yeah okay 1950 01:06:27,500 --> 01:06:28,833 I could see it I could see it 1951 01:06:28,833 --> 01:06:29,900 I could see it you know what I mean 1952 01:06:29,900 --> 01:06:32,066 I could see it I could be in that spectrum 1953 01:06:32,066 --> 01:06:35,033 so I sent that was um 1954 01:06:35,033 --> 01:06:36,783 that was the night that I got the paperwork 1955 01:06:36,783 --> 01:06:41,333 so that next morning I sent a Facebook message to her 1956 01:06:41,383 --> 01:06:44,000 to that person and I said hey um 1957 01:06:44,233 --> 01:06:46,150 were you in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania 1958 01:06:46,150 --> 01:06:50,733 December 1972 and put a baby up for adoption 1959 01:06:52,066 --> 01:06:55,266 so I sent that maybe a couple hours go by 1960 01:06:55,266 --> 01:06:56,283 get no response 1961 01:06:56,983 --> 01:06:58,233 so I remember um 1962 01:06:58,233 --> 01:06:59,500 calling my wife I said man 1963 01:06:59,500 --> 01:07:01,583 I haven't heard anything from that person 1964 01:07:01,583 --> 01:07:02,683 my wife said well 1965 01:07:03,466 --> 01:07:04,633 just relax she said 1966 01:07:04,633 --> 01:07:05,550 because if it's her 1967 01:07:05,550 --> 01:07:07,666 she might be processing what's going on absolutely 1968 01:07:07,666 --> 01:07:09,933 that's gotta be that's 45 years ago yeah 1969 01:07:09,983 --> 01:07:11,733 so while I'm waiting 1970 01:07:12,750 --> 01:07:15,233 um I just on my computer I just do a search 1971 01:07:15,233 --> 01:07:17,033 I just put the name I never put the name in Google 1972 01:07:17,033 --> 01:07:18,583 I just put Carol Denise Briggs 1973 01:07:18,583 --> 01:07:20,600 I just put it in Google yeah yeah 1974 01:07:20,833 --> 01:07:22,666 just like why why didn't I do this 1975 01:07:22,666 --> 01:07:25,533 I just put it in there while I'm waiting and another 1976 01:07:25,833 --> 01:07:29,533 she showed another Carol Denise Briggs shows up 1977 01:07:29,633 --> 01:07:31,433 I do some poke it take me like 5 minutes 1978 01:07:31,433 --> 01:07:32,550 I do some poking around like 1979 01:07:32,550 --> 01:07:34,466 I wonder what the d stood for yeah 1980 01:07:34,466 --> 01:07:35,900 because it's at Carol D Briggs 1981 01:07:35,900 --> 01:07:36,550 yeah okay 1982 01:07:36,550 --> 01:07:38,183 I said what does this d stand for 1983 01:07:38,183 --> 01:07:41,683 and I did like another site and it said her full name 1984 01:07:41,866 --> 01:07:43,266 and I'm looking there was a picture on it 1985 01:07:43,266 --> 01:07:45,150 and I looked at her picture and like 1986 01:07:45,150 --> 01:07:46,666 the picture of my family wasn't 1987 01:07:46,666 --> 01:07:48,833 I look back I'm like cause look 1988 01:07:48,833 --> 01:07:50,500 I like look look 1989 01:07:50,500 --> 01:07:51,983 look but we might have a shot here 1990 01:07:51,983 --> 01:07:53,100 she look a little bit like me 1991 01:07:53,100 --> 01:07:53,750 this is you know what I'm saying 1992 01:07:53,750 --> 01:07:54,350 like yeah 1993 01:07:54,350 --> 01:07:55,866 this might be something yeah 1994 01:07:55,866 --> 01:07:58,383 so all I did is copied and pasted that same message 1995 01:07:58,383 --> 01:07:59,366 same message yeah 1996 01:07:59,700 --> 01:08:01,000 went on Facebook 1997 01:08:01,350 --> 01:08:05,633 sent it to her and around an hour later 1998 01:08:05,633 --> 01:08:08,650 my phone pinged and it said message read 1999 01:08:09,150 --> 01:08:10,650 so I'm like oh shoot 2000 01:08:10,783 --> 01:08:13,983 my heart beating fast and I sent her a question Mark 2001 01:08:13,983 --> 01:08:16,933 like I did ask a question yeah 2002 01:08:17,066 --> 01:08:20,733 she typed back yes and I'm like whoa 2003 01:08:21,400 --> 01:08:24,250 so I get up and I walk out of the room that I was in 2004 01:08:24,633 --> 01:08:26,266 and then I sent the message 2005 01:08:26,266 --> 01:08:28,166 I said what did you name the baby 2006 01:08:28,833 --> 01:08:31,400 and she messaged back she said not Dylan 2007 01:08:32,150 --> 01:08:34,633 and I kind of chuckled and I said 2008 01:08:34,633 --> 01:08:36,433 what did you name him she said John 2009 01:08:36,433 --> 01:08:38,183 and she had it spelled the same way 2010 01:08:38,183 --> 01:08:40,266 it was on my paperwork wow 2011 01:08:40,266 --> 01:08:41,700 J o n wow 2012 01:08:41,700 --> 01:08:42,983 and I just started crying 2013 01:08:42,983 --> 01:08:43,633 I'm like ah 2014 01:08:43,633 --> 01:08:46,100 my bus stop crying and the secretary was like 2015 01:08:46,100 --> 01:08:46,866 what's wrong she said 2016 01:08:46,866 --> 01:08:48,066 you OK I said yeah 2017 01:08:48,066 --> 01:08:51,033 I'm I'm great now I'm really good yeah 2018 01:08:51,033 --> 01:08:53,866 so my mom was like what's going on 2019 01:08:53,866 --> 01:08:55,400 what's happening what's going on 2020 01:08:55,633 --> 01:08:56,150 and I said 2021 01:08:56,150 --> 01:08:58,150 I gotta call you later cause we have practice 2022 01:08:58,150 --> 01:09:02,333 uh huh so I called her later on and um 2023 01:09:02,500 --> 01:09:04,100 just a phenomenal conversation 2024 01:09:04,100 --> 01:09:04,966 I said 2025 01:09:05,500 --> 01:09:07,550 I'm John obviously 2026 01:09:07,550 --> 01:09:08,150 and she's oh 2027 01:09:08,150 --> 01:09:09,550 my god so 2028 01:09:09,550 --> 01:09:11,350 you know we had a great talk 2029 01:09:11,350 --> 01:09:12,233 I said where are you 2030 01:09:12,233 --> 01:09:15,366 she's in Youngstown I told her where I live 2031 01:09:15,500 --> 01:09:16,433 so 2032 01:09:16,433 --> 01:09:20,133 we were 10 minutes apart from each other my whole life 2033 01:09:20,383 --> 01:09:22,033 all that all that time in Youngstown 2034 01:09:22,033 --> 01:09:24,050 we were 10 10 minutes away from each other 2035 01:09:24,466 --> 01:09:25,150 um she told me 2036 01:09:25,150 --> 01:09:27,550 I said how did you end up in Pennsylvania 2037 01:09:27,550 --> 01:09:28,266 she said Dylan 2038 01:09:28,266 --> 01:09:30,600 I was young she said um 2039 01:09:30,633 --> 01:09:33,000 when my parents found out I was pregnant 2040 01:09:33,700 --> 01:09:35,500 you know my mom had me sent to a girl 2041 01:09:35,500 --> 01:09:38,350 I was sent to a girl's home for girls 2042 01:09:38,350 --> 01:09:39,750 in my same situation you know 2043 01:09:39,750 --> 01:09:40,983 yeah and she said 2044 01:09:40,983 --> 01:09:42,550 this was way back then she said 2045 01:09:42,550 --> 01:09:44,433 you know I was sent there to have you 2046 01:09:44,433 --> 01:09:45,033 she said you know 2047 01:09:45,033 --> 01:09:46,100 she was really apologetic 2048 01:09:46,100 --> 01:09:46,866 she said I was not 2049 01:09:46,866 --> 01:09:48,066 I couldn't raise you I wouldn't 2050 01:09:48,066 --> 01:09:49,400 I said I ain't mad at you 2051 01:09:49,466 --> 01:09:51,300 my life was great yeah 2052 01:09:51,300 --> 01:09:51,833 I'm like 2053 01:09:51,833 --> 01:09:52,383 I said I mean 2054 01:09:52,383 --> 01:09:54,300 everything worked out I guess we say it like that 2055 01:09:54,300 --> 01:09:55,166 you know but 2056 01:09:55,383 --> 01:09:56,366 but um 2057 01:09:56,900 --> 01:09:58,583 so we had that she talked about that 2058 01:09:58,583 --> 01:09:59,700 and I said well shoot 2059 01:09:59,700 --> 01:10:00,800 you was in Youngstown 2060 01:10:01,700 --> 01:10:03,350 I got any brothers or sisters 2061 01:10:03,350 --> 01:10:04,466 cause Youngstown is small 2062 01:10:04,466 --> 01:10:05,350 yeah you know 2063 01:10:05,350 --> 01:10:05,900 she said no 2064 01:10:05,900 --> 01:10:07,550 I never I never 2065 01:10:07,550 --> 01:10:09,100 I never had any more kids 2066 01:10:09,100 --> 01:10:10,700 and I never got married or anything wow 2067 01:10:10,700 --> 01:10:12,633 and then the natural and I just kind of naturally 2068 01:10:12,633 --> 01:10:13,766 just going through the questions 2069 01:10:14,100 --> 01:10:15,866 like taking my time I said well 2070 01:10:15,866 --> 01:10:17,983 shoot like kind of matter of factly will shoot 2071 01:10:17,983 --> 01:10:19,666 who is my dad yeah 2072 01:10:19,666 --> 01:10:23,200 and she said your dad is a man named Sherman Smith 2073 01:10:23,783 --> 01:10:27,483 and when she said that I almost passed out 2074 01:10:27,750 --> 01:10:28,866 and she said what's wrong 2075 01:10:28,866 --> 01:10:29,500 I said oh 2076 01:10:29,500 --> 01:10:32,366 I know him and she said how 2077 01:10:32,500 --> 01:10:35,566 and I said he recruited me to college 2078 01:10:35,666 --> 01:10:36,633 he was my coach 2079 01:10:36,633 --> 01:10:40,083 and he been my mentor for 20 something years 2080 01:10:40,666 --> 01:10:42,033 so and I said 2081 01:10:42,033 --> 01:10:44,700 did he know and she said he knew nothing 2082 01:10:44,700 --> 01:10:47,483 she said he was a senior on his way to Miami 2083 01:10:48,033 --> 01:10:49,233 she said I was a sophomore 2084 01:10:49,233 --> 01:10:51,866 she said it was just kids being kids 2085 01:10:51,866 --> 01:10:53,300 yeah and she said 2086 01:10:53,300 --> 01:10:54,783 it wasn't like we were boyfriend girlfriend 2087 01:10:54,783 --> 01:10:55,500 she said it was 2088 01:10:55,500 --> 01:10:56,950 she said it was just one of those things 2089 01:10:56,950 --> 01:10:58,166 and she said you know 2090 01:10:58,500 --> 01:10:59,600 he was 2091 01:11:00,500 --> 01:11:03,183 you know for somebody from our area to be leaving 2092 01:11:03,183 --> 01:11:05,466 and do what he was going to do yeah 2093 01:11:05,466 --> 01:11:08,283 I didn't want to impact that negatively 2094 01:11:08,633 --> 01:11:10,383 and she said and I knew where I was at 2095 01:11:10,383 --> 01:11:11,966 she said I wasn't in I 2096 01:11:12,283 --> 01:11:14,633 I wasn't prepared to even be a co parent with 2097 01:11:14,633 --> 01:11:16,900 with somebody right on on the on the child 2098 01:11:16,900 --> 01:11:17,750 she said my you know 2099 01:11:17,750 --> 01:11:20,033 my mom was still cleaning my room and making my bed 2100 01:11:20,033 --> 01:11:22,700 I wasn't ready I wasn't prepared to be a parent 2101 01:11:22,700 --> 01:11:24,283 I wasn't prepared to be a parent 2102 01:11:24,433 --> 01:11:27,966 and I wasn't going impede on what he had going on 2103 01:11:28,100 --> 01:11:29,433 so that was noble I said 2104 01:11:29,433 --> 01:11:30,433 I get it you know 2105 01:11:30,433 --> 01:11:31,433 I was I said 2106 01:11:31,433 --> 01:11:32,350 but he don't know she said 2107 01:11:32,350 --> 01:11:33,733 he has no idea 2108 01:11:34,266 --> 01:11:37,166 so so you have to be thinking like 2109 01:11:38,633 --> 01:11:39,866 like what do you do what 2110 01:11:39,866 --> 01:11:41,233 what's going through your mind at this point 2111 01:11:41,233 --> 01:11:41,666 what what 2112 01:11:41,666 --> 01:11:42,783 like you have to be thinking I 2113 01:11:42,783 --> 01:11:43,350 I do 2114 01:11:43,350 --> 01:11:44,700 I tell him do I not tell what 2115 01:11:44,700 --> 01:11:45,183 how do I yeah 2116 01:11:45,183 --> 01:11:45,983 I mean 2117 01:11:46,466 --> 01:11:48,550 like all of the the 2118 01:11:48,550 --> 01:11:52,833 the flashbacks of you guys look alike 2119 01:11:52,833 --> 01:11:54,283 yeah you guys look alike 2120 01:11:54,466 --> 01:11:55,983 we've been hearing that forever 2121 01:11:55,983 --> 01:11:56,783 yeah 2122 01:11:57,383 --> 01:11:58,883 when I went to Miami 2123 01:11:59,700 --> 01:12:00,633 um there was like a 2124 01:12:00,633 --> 01:12:03,100 a collage like a poster board 2125 01:12:03,100 --> 01:12:06,800 I had a of like accomplishments from high school 2126 01:12:06,983 --> 01:12:11,100 and then I had a picture of Polaroid of me and my dad 2127 01:12:11,100 --> 01:12:12,583 at this point me and my dad 2128 01:12:12,583 --> 01:12:13,633 it was just me on my visit 2129 01:12:13,633 --> 01:12:15,650 me and my dad on my visit to Miami 2130 01:12:16,583 --> 01:12:19,883 and I remember when guys would come in 2131 01:12:20,833 --> 01:12:22,200 um into my room 2132 01:12:22,383 --> 01:12:24,900 cause my dad was only there for that one season right 2133 01:12:24,900 --> 01:12:27,633 so when I had this poster board up in my room 2134 01:12:27,633 --> 01:12:29,866 my whole five years at at 2135 01:12:29,866 --> 01:12:31,850 at um Miami yeah 2136 01:12:32,066 --> 01:12:34,150 the guys would come my room and say man 2137 01:12:34,150 --> 01:12:35,566 what's is that your dad 2138 01:12:35,633 --> 01:12:38,033 nobody thought that was a coach right yeah 2139 01:12:38,033 --> 01:12:38,900 they they knew coach 2140 01:12:38,900 --> 01:12:39,350 yeah they 2141 01:12:39,350 --> 01:12:40,783 they never known him yeah 2142 01:12:40,783 --> 01:12:42,033 yeah they never known him yeah 2143 01:12:42,033 --> 01:12:42,750 like and they ask you 2144 01:12:42,750 --> 01:12:43,383 who's your dad no 2145 01:12:43,383 --> 01:12:44,100 I said no 2146 01:12:44,100 --> 01:12:46,433 I said that's my coach yeah 2147 01:12:46,433 --> 01:12:47,466 because they knew it was at Miami 2148 01:12:47,466 --> 01:12:48,833 they could see that this is the locker room 2149 01:12:48,833 --> 01:12:50,300 like other guys gonna like 2150 01:12:50,300 --> 01:12:51,150 that's it no 2151 01:12:51,150 --> 01:12:52,233 that's my coach yeah 2152 01:12:52,233 --> 01:12:54,466 so I heard that forever you know 2153 01:12:54,466 --> 01:12:54,983 but you know 2154 01:12:54,983 --> 01:12:56,633 and then so those those 2155 01:12:56,633 --> 01:12:58,266 my initial flashback like wow 2156 01:12:58,266 --> 01:12:59,150 make sense yeah 2157 01:12:59,150 --> 01:13:00,266 but then it was like a 2158 01:13:00,266 --> 01:13:02,500 a level of pride because don't forget you 2159 01:13:02,500 --> 01:13:04,100 when you go way back an hour ago 2160 01:13:04,100 --> 01:13:05,450 when we first started this thing 2161 01:13:05,466 --> 01:13:07,966 my sense of self yeah 2162 01:13:08,266 --> 01:13:09,466 it was a lot it still is 2163 01:13:09,466 --> 01:13:10,900 I mean it still is on some level 2164 01:13:10,900 --> 01:13:14,250 those those shades are still there that still 2165 01:13:16,183 --> 01:13:18,233 but my sense of self was low 2166 01:13:18,233 --> 01:13:19,833 and I just felt like you mean 2167 01:13:19,833 --> 01:13:21,433 you felt the abandonment 2168 01:13:21,433 --> 01:13:22,933 must not have been good enough 2169 01:13:22,950 --> 01:13:25,683 nobody wanted me all these different things right 2170 01:13:25,750 --> 01:13:28,083 and so even went to find you know 2171 01:13:28,150 --> 01:13:29,783 then the sense of pride yeah 2172 01:13:29,783 --> 01:13:31,800 went through the roof of me cause I'm like 2173 01:13:32,150 --> 01:13:35,600 my dad is Sherman Smith man yeah 2174 01:13:35,833 --> 01:13:36,500 this guy I mean 2175 01:13:36,500 --> 01:13:37,950 come on the whole world know him 2176 01:13:37,950 --> 01:13:40,900 this guy's he's unbelievable yeah 2177 01:13:40,900 --> 01:13:42,200 unbelievable 2178 01:13:42,350 --> 01:13:44,866 and it like so many things started making sense to me 2179 01:13:44,866 --> 01:13:47,266 and I'm like that's where this come from 2180 01:13:47,266 --> 01:13:50,450 that's where I come from and then it was like 2181 01:13:50,500 --> 01:13:51,633 so ironic 2182 01:13:51,633 --> 01:13:54,666 and just completely ridiculous that you start thinking 2183 01:13:54,666 --> 01:13:55,966 about um 2184 01:13:56,350 --> 01:13:58,083 nature over nurture sure 2185 01:13:58,150 --> 01:14:00,750 because I'm like we both from Youngstown now 2186 01:14:00,750 --> 01:14:03,200 my dad he grew up with both his parents and all that 2187 01:14:03,266 --> 01:14:04,300 I said here I am 2188 01:14:04,300 --> 01:14:06,733 I'm I grew up across town 2189 01:14:06,750 --> 01:14:08,566 completely different you know 2190 01:14:09,150 --> 01:14:10,866 a rougher circumstance yeah 2191 01:14:10,866 --> 01:14:12,000 by far yeah 2192 01:14:12,133 --> 01:14:14,733 but in the end or as we went through 2193 01:14:14,783 --> 01:14:18,100 we both end up at Miami how ironic yeah 2194 01:14:18,100 --> 01:14:19,550 yeah about a bunch of people go to Miami 2195 01:14:19,550 --> 01:14:20,233 what up right 2196 01:14:20,233 --> 01:14:22,500 we're both in a hall of Fame at Miami yeah 2197 01:14:22,500 --> 01:14:23,850 both of us in a hall of Fame 2198 01:14:24,183 --> 01:14:27,650 both of us leave Miami to go play professional ball 2199 01:14:27,950 --> 01:14:30,350 both of our careers end cause of knee surgeries 2200 01:14:30,350 --> 01:14:31,150 wow 2201 01:14:31,550 --> 01:14:35,500 both of us after playing professional football 2202 01:14:35,500 --> 01:14:37,700 going to education now 2203 01:14:37,700 --> 01:14:38,983 I'mma tell you right now 2204 01:14:38,983 --> 01:14:41,700 I wasn't tracking my life to Sherman Smith right 2205 01:14:41,700 --> 01:14:43,700 I wouldn't like what did Sherman do now 2206 01:14:43,700 --> 01:14:45,233 I'm gonna do that next I'm just living 2207 01:14:45,233 --> 01:14:47,066 I ain't thinking about what I'm 2208 01:14:47,066 --> 01:14:49,300 I ain't modeling nothing I'm living life yeah 2209 01:14:49,300 --> 01:14:50,900 but we both end up in education 2210 01:14:50,900 --> 01:14:53,050 yeah our both 2211 01:14:53,300 --> 01:14:57,250 our first college football coaching job 2212 01:14:58,150 --> 01:15:00,050 after we both were high school coaches too 2213 01:15:00,700 --> 01:15:01,666 are both college 2214 01:15:01,666 --> 01:15:05,683 are both our first college football job Miami 2215 01:15:06,183 --> 01:15:09,783 our next college football job in the Big Ten 2216 01:15:09,783 --> 01:15:12,466 he went to Illinois I went to Indiana 2217 01:15:12,466 --> 01:15:14,933 wow and then we kind of laugh about this 2218 01:15:15,233 --> 01:15:17,766 then we both become um 2219 01:15:18,300 --> 01:15:19,966 professional football coaches 2220 01:15:20,983 --> 01:15:22,583 both of us go to the Super Bowl 2221 01:15:22,583 --> 01:15:23,383 yeah we 2222 01:15:23,383 --> 01:15:25,000 both got Super Bowl rings 2223 01:15:25,350 --> 01:15:28,133 both of us also lost to Tom Brady sorry 2224 01:15:29,583 --> 01:15:31,550 Tom Brady Tom Brady 2225 01:15:31,550 --> 01:15:33,700 your nemesis your nemesis and and 2226 01:15:33,700 --> 01:15:35,750 and now one of my bosses how about that 2227 01:15:35,750 --> 01:15:38,100 I love it yeah wow 2228 01:15:38,100 --> 01:15:39,633 so all all of these things man 2229 01:15:39,633 --> 01:15:41,550 so now I gotta tell him right 2230 01:15:41,550 --> 01:15:42,950 yeah yeah 2231 01:15:42,950 --> 01:15:44,700 that's him so what's going through your head there 2232 01:15:44,700 --> 01:15:46,883 how do you how do you decide to do that 2233 01:15:47,183 --> 01:15:51,250 um so the night that I found out 2234 01:15:51,350 --> 01:15:53,050 you know I'm telling my family and everything 2235 01:15:53,350 --> 01:15:55,350 and you won't believe my dad is Sherman Smith 2236 01:15:55,350 --> 01:15:56,800 what I mean there's all these 2237 01:15:56,950 --> 01:15:59,666 so the next morning I'm like man 2238 01:15:59,666 --> 01:16:01,750 I'm gonna tell him so I text my mom 2239 01:16:01,750 --> 01:16:03,100 I said hey 2240 01:16:03,100 --> 01:16:05,066 can I tell my dad and she said yeah 2241 01:16:05,066 --> 01:16:08,983 you tell him so I kind of laughed about that yeah 2242 01:16:08,983 --> 01:16:10,800 you you can be the one to tell him that 2243 01:16:10,866 --> 01:16:12,950 so I text him and I said hey 2244 01:16:12,950 --> 01:16:13,383 I said hey 2245 01:16:13,383 --> 01:16:14,483 what's going on coach 2246 01:16:14,900 --> 01:16:16,766 I want to talk to you about something 2247 01:16:17,300 --> 01:16:20,400 so he called back I thought he would text me back yeah 2248 01:16:20,466 --> 01:16:22,666 that give me some time to get my mind together right 2249 01:16:22,666 --> 01:16:24,983 he called back and I'm like 2250 01:16:24,983 --> 01:16:26,100 oh man I ain't ready for this 2251 01:16:26,100 --> 01:16:28,433 I didn't we weren't prepared for that conversation 2252 01:16:28,433 --> 01:16:30,633 but I get on the phone and I say hey 2253 01:16:30,633 --> 01:16:31,066 you know hey 2254 01:16:31,066 --> 01:16:31,983 what's going on coach hey 2255 01:16:31,983 --> 01:16:32,666 what's going on Dylan 2256 01:16:32,666 --> 01:16:34,650 I said you know 2257 01:16:34,666 --> 01:16:35,383 I said you know 2258 01:16:35,383 --> 01:16:36,783 I'm adopted he's like yeah 2259 01:16:36,783 --> 01:16:38,100 I I know you're adopted 2260 01:16:38,100 --> 01:16:40,866 I said I've been looking for my biological family 2261 01:16:40,866 --> 01:16:42,433 and my dad is really strong in his faith 2262 01:16:42,433 --> 01:16:42,983 he's like man 2263 01:16:42,983 --> 01:16:44,383 that's you know yeah 2264 01:16:44,383 --> 01:16:46,433 and I said I found my biological mom 2265 01:16:46,433 --> 01:16:47,900 he's like oh my goodness man 2266 01:16:47,900 --> 01:16:49,383 praise God and all this and I was like 2267 01:16:49,383 --> 01:16:50,366 hold up you know 2268 01:16:50,550 --> 01:16:52,166 it's another picture hang on 2269 01:16:52,550 --> 01:16:54,533 hold up and I said um 2270 01:16:54,950 --> 01:16:56,066 and I said it just like this 2271 01:16:56,066 --> 01:16:58,466 I said I asked her who was 2272 01:16:58,466 --> 01:16:59,750 I said my uh 2273 01:16:59,750 --> 01:17:01,950 my mom's name is Carol Briggs 2274 01:17:01,950 --> 01:17:05,066 and when I asked her who was my biological dad 2275 01:17:05,066 --> 01:17:06,200 she said you 2276 01:17:06,950 --> 01:17:08,500 and it was like boom 2277 01:17:08,500 --> 01:17:10,666 he was sitting there and you can hear him 2278 01:17:10,666 --> 01:17:13,100 he's kind of talking to himself 2279 01:17:13,100 --> 01:17:15,633 he's mumbling to himself and then he said I 2280 01:17:15,633 --> 01:17:18,250 I do know Carol I know Carol 2281 01:17:19,233 --> 01:17:21,300 and so I'm excited yeah 2282 01:17:21,300 --> 01:17:23,266 like I'm fired up I'm like yeah 2283 01:17:23,266 --> 01:17:25,633 cause this is a really exciting thing for you 2284 01:17:25,633 --> 01:17:27,350 but for him it's a capstone for me is a 2285 01:17:27,350 --> 01:17:28,850 like a super milestone for me 2286 01:17:28,983 --> 01:17:31,633 and he was quiet and he I'm excited 2287 01:17:31,633 --> 01:17:33,350 he said he kind of cut me off a little bit 2288 01:17:33,350 --> 01:17:34,200 he said Dylan 2289 01:17:34,750 --> 01:17:36,233 I need to get off the phone with you 2290 01:17:36,233 --> 01:17:37,850 I need to process this yeah 2291 01:17:37,983 --> 01:17:41,483 so I'm I'm initially like miffed like man 2292 01:17:41,583 --> 01:17:45,350 why is he so but it hit me in the 2293 01:17:45,350 --> 01:17:48,300 and it was like maybe 40 minutes before we got back on 2294 01:17:48,300 --> 01:17:49,333 the phone yeah 2295 01:17:49,433 --> 01:17:50,833 and he's and and you know 2296 01:17:50,833 --> 01:17:52,050 I'm like wait a minute 2297 01:17:52,183 --> 01:17:53,566 he knew nothing 2298 01:17:54,033 --> 01:17:56,533 so when I got on the phone with him he said Dylan 2299 01:17:57,550 --> 01:18:00,683 he said you knew you had parents out there 2300 01:18:01,150 --> 01:18:04,283 he said Carol knew she had a baby out there 2301 01:18:04,383 --> 01:18:05,950 I knew nothing that's right 2302 01:18:05,950 --> 01:18:07,900 it'd be different if I knew something I'd be like oh 2303 01:18:07,900 --> 01:18:09,750 okay this I knew about this 2304 01:18:09,750 --> 01:18:11,566 I just didn't know the specifics 2305 01:18:11,583 --> 01:18:14,800 so I knew nothing so he wanted to speak to her 2306 01:18:15,183 --> 01:18:17,800 he called her had a great conversation with her 2307 01:18:17,983 --> 01:18:19,750 he called me back he said Dylan 2308 01:18:19,750 --> 01:18:21,433 I heard everything I got the whole story 2309 01:18:21,433 --> 01:18:24,000 so I just want to be sure I want to be 100% sure 2310 01:18:24,350 --> 01:18:25,733 and um um 2311 01:18:26,383 --> 01:18:27,950 I said yeah let's do a DNA thing 2312 01:18:27,950 --> 01:18:31,283 so we did the DNA thing in between that time 2313 01:18:31,583 --> 01:18:34,500 I'm getting calls from my stepmom who I'm 2314 01:18:34,500 --> 01:18:35,666 I knew her from recruiting 2315 01:18:35,666 --> 01:18:37,400 you know my mom my mom Sharon 2316 01:18:37,783 --> 01:18:39,066 she called me she's like look 2317 01:18:39,066 --> 01:18:40,933 y'all can do whatever y'all wanna do 2318 01:18:41,000 --> 01:18:43,966 I'm looking at pictures it ain't even no conversation 2319 01:18:45,550 --> 01:18:47,950 we wasting time yeah you wasting time 2320 01:18:47,950 --> 01:18:49,183 but and she was very 2321 01:18:49,183 --> 01:18:52,433 she was extremely excited and happy and supportive yeah 2322 01:18:52,433 --> 01:18:55,200 and then what a week two weeks later 2323 01:18:55,433 --> 01:19:01,033 the paternity test came back in 99.9% so we 2324 01:19:01,033 --> 01:19:02,750 it it we went from there he called me 2325 01:19:02,750 --> 01:19:04,900 I sent it to we've been we have been talking sure yeah 2326 01:19:04,900 --> 01:19:06,750 like yeah every day from that point 2327 01:19:06,750 --> 01:19:07,383 yeah and I 2328 01:19:07,383 --> 01:19:07,783 it's funny 2329 01:19:07,783 --> 01:19:10,450 I sent him an article from when I played in Canada 2330 01:19:10,983 --> 01:19:13,600 and it was a picture of me and I'm sitting there 2331 01:19:13,783 --> 01:19:14,833 and he said Dylan 2332 01:19:14,833 --> 01:19:16,433 he said this hit me so much 2333 01:19:16,433 --> 01:19:18,433 he said I was looking at that article 2334 01:19:18,433 --> 01:19:20,483 he said I seen the picture when you sent it 2335 01:19:20,500 --> 01:19:22,233 and he said I was sitting up wondering 2336 01:19:22,233 --> 01:19:23,750 where was I at when I took that picture 2337 01:19:23,750 --> 01:19:25,000 yeah yeah 2338 01:19:25,633 --> 01:19:26,850 he said just look 2339 01:19:26,950 --> 01:19:28,266 he said I thought it was me yeah 2340 01:19:28,266 --> 01:19:29,433 he said I'm looking at this like man 2341 01:19:29,433 --> 01:19:30,583 I wonder why I did this he said 2342 01:19:30,583 --> 01:19:31,583 I'm thinking he said 2343 01:19:31,583 --> 01:19:33,800 I thought you were sending me one of my articles 2344 01:19:34,783 --> 01:19:35,433 he's like I'm reading 2345 01:19:35,433 --> 01:19:36,633 looking at this like wait a minute 2346 01:19:36,633 --> 01:19:38,066 where was I when I took that picture 2347 01:19:38,066 --> 01:19:39,183 cause it was he said 2348 01:19:39,183 --> 01:19:41,966 that's me sitting there so 2349 01:19:42,633 --> 01:19:43,900 um everything went 2350 01:19:43,900 --> 01:19:45,500 you know paternity test and he called 2351 01:19:45,500 --> 01:19:46,550 I sent it to first I 2352 01:19:46,550 --> 01:19:49,433 I emailed it to him and then he called me 2353 01:19:49,433 --> 01:19:50,100 he said alright 2354 01:19:50,100 --> 01:19:51,833 let's go let's do it 2355 01:19:51,833 --> 01:19:52,800 you know so everything 2356 01:19:53,433 --> 01:19:53,750 you know 2357 01:19:53,750 --> 01:19:56,350 just kind of built from there because we'd always talk 2358 01:19:56,350 --> 01:19:57,466 we had a great relationship 2359 01:19:57,466 --> 01:19:58,100 yeah that's right 2360 01:19:58,100 --> 01:19:59,666 you know and it just 2361 01:19:59,666 --> 01:20:01,083 it just went to the next level 2362 01:20:01,233 --> 01:20:02,233 so what was it like I mean 2363 01:20:02,233 --> 01:20:05,283 the first time you see each other after yeah 2364 01:20:05,750 --> 01:20:06,666 what was that like what 2365 01:20:06,666 --> 01:20:08,633 what are you feeling what is 2366 01:20:08,633 --> 01:20:10,466 how does that go yeah 2367 01:20:10,466 --> 01:20:11,550 and it was phenomenal I mean 2368 01:20:11,550 --> 01:20:14,566 so I'm at USC and um 2369 01:20:14,633 --> 01:20:16,450 I said first I want to you know 2370 01:20:16,866 --> 01:20:18,350 I'm out recruiting and I I 2371 01:20:18,350 --> 01:20:21,300 kind of structured my recruiting to get to these spots 2372 01:20:21,300 --> 01:20:24,033 you know so I wanted to go to Ohio 2373 01:20:24,033 --> 01:20:24,633 I said man 2374 01:20:24,633 --> 01:20:26,800 I wanted to go and see my mom 2375 01:20:27,100 --> 01:20:29,933 you know so um 2376 01:20:30,300 --> 01:20:33,233 I go to see her and that was really 2377 01:20:33,233 --> 01:20:34,383 I mean it was really special cause 2378 01:20:34,383 --> 01:20:34,900 you know 2379 01:20:34,900 --> 01:20:36,466 we get caught up in this thing and everything with 2380 01:20:36,466 --> 01:20:37,666 with my dad that's 2381 01:20:37,666 --> 01:20:39,333 that's a phenomenal coincidence 2382 01:20:39,950 --> 01:20:42,183 God story unbelievable right 2383 01:20:42,183 --> 01:20:43,183 but man I was fired up 2384 01:20:43,183 --> 01:20:44,350 you never met your mom either 2385 01:20:44,350 --> 01:20:46,100 yeah fired up to meet my mom 2386 01:20:46,100 --> 01:20:46,666 I mean come on 2387 01:20:46,666 --> 01:20:47,466 you know and 2388 01:20:47,466 --> 01:20:49,583 and so I was I was extra fired up 2389 01:20:49,583 --> 01:20:51,933 and I remember going there and um 2390 01:20:52,033 --> 01:20:53,150 she knew I was coming and everything 2391 01:20:53,150 --> 01:20:55,550 and I and I got there and we just look at each other 2392 01:20:55,550 --> 01:20:58,633 and I'm like it just was like wow 2393 01:20:58,633 --> 01:20:59,983 it's like he was looking in the mirror 2394 01:20:59,983 --> 01:21:03,666 yeah and my uncle was there because my mom was like hey 2395 01:21:03,666 --> 01:21:04,100 here's you know 2396 01:21:04,100 --> 01:21:06,833 here's my brother and then because my mom was like 2397 01:21:06,833 --> 01:21:08,833 I don't know who you're my son 2398 01:21:08,833 --> 01:21:11,300 but I have never met I've never been around you 2399 01:21:11,300 --> 01:21:13,433 yeah and maybe like 10 minutes later 2400 01:21:13,433 --> 01:21:15,450 she told my uncle you can leave 2401 01:21:15,466 --> 01:21:17,033 it was almost like we get 2402 01:21:17,033 --> 01:21:18,350 this guy ain't crazy or nothing 2403 01:21:18,350 --> 01:21:20,583 is he and she was like around 10 minutes later 2404 01:21:20,583 --> 01:21:21,383 she's like 2405 01:21:22,783 --> 01:21:24,183 I'm good this is my son 2406 01:21:24,183 --> 01:21:27,033 I'm good and we just like embrace 2407 01:21:27,033 --> 01:21:28,466 and I kind of just holding her hand 2408 01:21:28,466 --> 01:21:30,066 it was just like I mean 2409 01:21:30,066 --> 01:21:32,166 it was like really really 2410 01:21:32,333 --> 01:21:35,183 I'm emotional and bonding and just like man 2411 01:21:35,183 --> 01:21:36,500 it was it was magical that 2412 01:21:36,500 --> 01:21:38,366 that was really strong you know 2413 01:21:38,466 --> 01:21:40,100 so got a chance to spend time with her 2414 01:21:40,100 --> 01:21:43,750 and then two days later I'm going to 2415 01:21:43,750 --> 01:21:45,033 I'm recruiting in Tennessee 2416 01:21:45,033 --> 01:21:47,500 my dad lives in live right outside of Nashville 2417 01:21:47,500 --> 01:21:49,483 so I pull up 2418 01:21:49,833 --> 01:21:51,633 you know on the street and I'm 2419 01:21:51,633 --> 01:21:52,783 I'm and my dad 2420 01:21:52,783 --> 01:21:54,633 he's looking out I can see him looking out down there 2421 01:21:54,633 --> 01:21:55,583 I mean I'm sitting in the car 2422 01:21:55,583 --> 01:21:56,383 I'm like 2423 01:21:56,983 --> 01:21:57,500 yeah I'm like 2424 01:21:57,500 --> 01:21:58,100 ah man 2425 01:21:58,100 --> 01:21:59,383 let me get myself together here 2426 01:21:59,383 --> 01:22:01,066 yeah I don't met my 2427 01:22:01,066 --> 01:22:02,350 it's not like I ain't never met my dad 2428 01:22:02,350 --> 01:22:04,266 I mean I know him as Coach Smith right 2429 01:22:04,266 --> 01:22:05,900 so but I go walk in 2430 01:22:05,900 --> 01:22:07,883 I go up and I knock on the door 2431 01:22:08,233 --> 01:22:10,233 and I didn't expect him to do this 2432 01:22:10,233 --> 01:22:12,500 and it was pretty emotional and strong again 2433 01:22:12,500 --> 01:22:14,150 another strong movie clip right here 2434 01:22:14,150 --> 01:22:15,483 yeah and um 2435 01:22:15,833 --> 01:22:18,183 he opened the door and he just opened his arms and said 2436 01:22:18,183 --> 01:22:19,750 my son you know 2437 01:22:19,750 --> 01:22:21,166 and me for me 2438 01:22:21,300 --> 01:22:23,666 I'd never had that reference 2439 01:22:23,666 --> 01:22:24,866 that's right yeah 2440 01:22:24,866 --> 01:22:26,750 you know you know 2441 01:22:26,750 --> 01:22:29,233 especially from somebody who I really 2442 01:22:29,233 --> 01:22:31,866 really admired and loved and 2443 01:22:31,866 --> 01:22:32,700 and you know and 2444 01:22:32,700 --> 01:22:34,166 and um 2445 01:22:35,033 --> 01:22:36,733 appreciated and respected 2446 01:22:37,100 --> 01:22:37,700 so man 2447 01:22:37,700 --> 01:22:38,266 it was it was 2448 01:22:38,266 --> 01:22:39,700 that was strong that was strong 2449 01:22:39,700 --> 01:22:40,266 it was it was 2450 01:22:40,266 --> 01:22:42,150 it was really good I love that reaction 2451 01:22:42,150 --> 01:22:44,650 I think that is just that is beautiful 2452 01:22:45,066 --> 01:22:45,633 yes sir 2453 01:22:45,633 --> 01:22:47,166 yeah I 2454 01:22:47,866 --> 01:22:48,433 you know in the 2455 01:22:48,433 --> 01:22:52,550 in the movie the curtain goes down right 2456 01:22:52,550 --> 01:22:55,166 and it's that's a beautiful movie 2457 01:22:55,900 --> 01:22:58,200 but in real life you have four boys of your own 2458 01:22:58,550 --> 01:23:01,583 yep and I don't 2459 01:23:01,583 --> 01:23:04,950 I'm so interested to know what 2460 01:23:04,950 --> 01:23:06,183 you know in a lot of ways 2461 01:23:06,183 --> 01:23:12,066 your hardships and your the way that you had to grow up 2462 01:23:12,066 --> 01:23:15,866 and the abandonment that you felt in some ways and 2463 01:23:15,866 --> 01:23:19,566 and all of that forged who you are 2464 01:23:19,583 --> 01:23:21,466 they were a chrysalis that 2465 01:23:21,466 --> 01:23:22,366 that 2466 01:23:22,900 --> 01:23:24,533 that made you great 2467 01:23:25,750 --> 01:23:30,266 but you also didn't get the benefit of a lot of 2468 01:23:30,266 --> 01:23:31,466 you know relationship with your father 2469 01:23:31,466 --> 01:23:33,166 your mother all of these things 2470 01:23:33,666 --> 01:23:35,183 there's this tension here 2471 01:23:35,183 --> 01:23:38,266 that you must feel about raising your own boys 2472 01:23:38,266 --> 01:23:41,500 you want them to I mean 2473 01:23:41,500 --> 01:23:42,866 you want them to have achievements 2474 01:23:42,866 --> 01:23:46,166 you want them to feel the triumph that you felt 2475 01:23:46,183 --> 01:23:48,100 at the same time you know 2476 01:23:48,100 --> 01:23:49,983 the way to you're not gonna deprive them of 2477 01:23:49,983 --> 01:23:50,833 of you know 2478 01:23:50,833 --> 01:23:51,983 that's not the way to get that 2479 01:23:51,983 --> 01:23:52,900 so what yes 2480 01:23:52,900 --> 01:23:54,166 tell me about 2481 01:23:54,383 --> 01:23:59,783 how do you bring this into raising your own boys 2482 01:23:59,783 --> 01:24:00,466 into men and 2483 01:24:00,466 --> 01:24:01,833 and how do you think about that 2484 01:24:01,833 --> 01:24:02,550 and how does that 2485 01:24:02,550 --> 01:24:04,533 how is that informed how you've done that 2486 01:24:05,100 --> 01:24:07,666 well just to take like a half a step back 2487 01:24:07,666 --> 01:24:10,533 even with my dad in the toughest part for my dad 2488 01:24:11,266 --> 01:24:12,950 you know in this kind of bridge 2489 01:24:12,950 --> 01:24:14,266 a bridge to this right here 2490 01:24:14,266 --> 01:24:16,533 the toughest part for my dad is he said 2491 01:24:17,233 --> 01:24:18,800 I know how you grew up 2492 01:24:20,500 --> 01:24:23,266 I knew I know also your dad 2493 01:24:23,266 --> 01:24:24,750 but I knew from recruiting you 2494 01:24:24,750 --> 01:24:27,100 I knew from the I went to your 2495 01:24:27,100 --> 01:24:28,233 your place I knew 2496 01:24:28,233 --> 01:24:30,383 so that was the part that was crushing to him 2497 01:24:30,383 --> 01:24:32,800 yeah later on to say man 2498 01:24:33,233 --> 01:24:34,183 and for him to say man 2499 01:24:34,183 --> 01:24:35,700 God had to have his hand in your life 2500 01:24:35,700 --> 01:24:37,383 he said because he looked back 2501 01:24:37,383 --> 01:24:38,150 that's the part that was 2502 01:24:38,150 --> 01:24:41,033 cause he knew this guy had it rough 2503 01:24:41,033 --> 01:24:42,550 yeah and I'm his dad 2504 01:24:42,550 --> 01:24:43,983 I come to find out I'm his dad 2505 01:24:43,983 --> 01:24:45,300 yeah and if he was under 2506 01:24:45,300 --> 01:24:47,650 if if I was his dad 2507 01:24:48,066 --> 01:24:51,800 those things likely is it those things he experienced 2508 01:24:51,866 --> 01:24:53,233 he could have done different things 2509 01:24:53,233 --> 01:24:53,900 it wouldn't have happened 2510 01:24:53,900 --> 01:24:54,866 I was his dad it wouldn't have 2511 01:24:54,866 --> 01:24:56,383 we wouldn't have been in those situations right 2512 01:24:56,383 --> 01:24:57,183 you know I'm saying 2513 01:24:57,666 --> 01:24:58,066 you know I 2514 01:24:58,066 --> 01:24:59,500 I can strongly say I like 2515 01:24:59,500 --> 01:25:01,266 I wouldn't have been in those situations yeah 2516 01:25:01,266 --> 01:25:04,066 so that was a that was a tough part for him 2517 01:25:04,066 --> 01:25:06,383 I can imagine looking back like man yes 2518 01:25:06,383 --> 01:25:09,300 I'm so glad that my son turned out the way he did 2519 01:25:09,300 --> 01:25:10,750 but man I know 2520 01:25:10,750 --> 01:25:11,566 cause I was 2521 01:25:12,150 --> 01:25:14,450 I seen some of the things 2522 01:25:14,833 --> 01:25:15,233 you know 2523 01:25:15,233 --> 01:25:17,833 and from recruiting them and everything it was rough 2524 01:25:17,833 --> 01:25:19,383 yeah but to go to my sons 2525 01:25:19,383 --> 01:25:20,100 you know to me 2526 01:25:20,100 --> 01:25:24,083 that's a perfect segue into kind of pain into purpose 2527 01:25:24,183 --> 01:25:25,483 you know for me 2528 01:25:25,666 --> 01:25:29,383 because forever from my onset 2529 01:25:29,383 --> 01:25:30,233 and sitting there 2530 01:25:30,233 --> 01:25:33,633 and hearing some of the things that I heard again 2531 01:25:33,633 --> 01:25:35,633 I don't blame my mom it just life was life 2532 01:25:35,633 --> 01:25:36,433 you know yeah 2533 01:25:36,433 --> 01:25:38,833 and some of the circumstances that was going on 2534 01:25:38,833 --> 01:25:39,866 I used to just sit there 2535 01:25:39,866 --> 01:25:41,383 and be up at 3 o'clock in the morning 2536 01:25:41,383 --> 01:25:43,266 or whatever it is and just seeing 2537 01:25:43,266 --> 01:25:45,133 and hearing some of the stuff that I heard 2538 01:25:45,633 --> 01:25:51,133 and like my driving force was I when when I have kids 2539 01:25:51,750 --> 01:25:54,083 they're my kids will never feel the way I felt 2540 01:25:54,833 --> 01:25:57,033 they'll never feel the helplessness or it 2541 01:25:57,033 --> 01:26:00,466 whatever it was the the list of emotions are are vast 2542 01:26:00,466 --> 01:26:02,550 yeah they'll never feel this way 2543 01:26:02,550 --> 01:26:06,183 I will make sure that my kids don't feel this way yeah 2544 01:26:06,183 --> 01:26:09,466 you know they will not have No. 1 No. 2 2545 01:26:09,466 --> 01:26:12,166 they will not have a disconnect from their dad 2546 01:26:12,783 --> 01:26:14,300 yeah I'm not my sons 2547 01:26:14,300 --> 01:26:16,200 you know and now here I'm with four sons 2548 01:26:16,700 --> 01:26:18,833 like it's the ultimate blessing for me 2549 01:26:18,833 --> 01:26:20,950 I would I'm don't care what's going on 2550 01:26:20,950 --> 01:26:25,250 my sons would never feel the way I felt 2551 01:26:25,433 --> 01:26:27,183 they will never feel any helplessness 2552 01:26:27,183 --> 01:26:29,100 they'll never feel lack of belief 2553 01:26:29,100 --> 01:26:30,350 or confidence from their dad 2554 01:26:30,350 --> 01:26:32,766 they'll never you know 2555 01:26:33,750 --> 01:26:36,166 um feel any emotional disconnect 2556 01:26:36,500 --> 01:26:40,466 you know I'm gonna go I was for years 2557 01:26:40,466 --> 01:26:41,900 all the way up until I had sons 2558 01:26:41,900 --> 01:26:44,450 that was that's my driving thing yeah 2559 01:26:44,466 --> 01:26:46,566 when I have the when I have kids 2560 01:26:47,583 --> 01:26:49,733 this is the type of dad that I wanna be 2561 01:26:50,033 --> 01:26:52,400 this is the type of dad I wanna be and I was like 2562 01:26:53,666 --> 01:26:54,783 like driving 2563 01:26:54,783 --> 01:26:55,783 probably more than anything 2564 01:26:55,783 --> 01:26:57,666 of what I was gonna accomplish as an adult 2565 01:26:57,666 --> 01:26:58,783 yeah yeah 2566 01:26:58,783 --> 01:26:59,350 you know that was 2567 01:26:59,350 --> 01:26:59,983 to me that was 2568 01:26:59,983 --> 01:27:02,500 that's my crown jewel accomplishment 2569 01:27:02,500 --> 01:27:03,983 and it's still an ongoing thing 2570 01:27:03,983 --> 01:27:06,850 of the relationship I have with my sons 2571 01:27:07,350 --> 01:27:08,433 you know it didn't have to be that way 2572 01:27:08,433 --> 01:27:09,850 you could have used it as an excuse 2573 01:27:10,500 --> 01:27:11,400 exactly 2574 01:27:12,183 --> 01:27:13,150 exactly I 2575 01:27:13,150 --> 01:27:13,666 hey I 2576 01:27:13,666 --> 01:27:17,033 I have terrible examples so hey guys 2577 01:27:17,033 --> 01:27:19,650 don't hold it against me and they know 2578 01:27:19,700 --> 01:27:21,700 you know I had a rough and these guys knew that 2579 01:27:21,700 --> 01:27:23,383 they knew but you 2580 01:27:23,383 --> 01:27:24,966 but they knew 2581 01:27:25,950 --> 01:27:31,266 and I would let them know where this level of over love 2582 01:27:31,266 --> 01:27:34,366 over intentionality where it's coming from 2583 01:27:35,666 --> 01:27:37,383 I didn't have that yeah 2584 01:27:37,383 --> 01:27:40,066 and I'mma make sure that when it's all said and done 2585 01:27:40,066 --> 01:27:42,466 and my son who's 25 26 years old 2586 01:27:42,466 --> 01:27:43,866 he ain't gonna look back and say man 2587 01:27:43,866 --> 01:27:46,500 my dad was like half stepping man 2588 01:27:46,500 --> 01:27:50,150 he ain't he really said that was overly on like man 2589 01:27:50,150 --> 01:27:52,266 this guy was like you know 2590 01:27:52,266 --> 01:27:54,833 really want me to be my best 2591 01:27:54,833 --> 01:27:55,300 yeah like 2592 01:27:55,300 --> 01:27:57,550 really wanted me to be the best I could be 2593 01:27:57,550 --> 01:28:00,583 and was really like there for me and 2594 01:28:00,583 --> 01:28:04,300 and help me and guide me and all these different things 2595 01:28:04,300 --> 01:28:05,583 he always was there for me 2596 01:28:05,583 --> 01:28:08,083 he made he was overly there for me yeah 2597 01:28:08,466 --> 01:28:09,800 yeah yeah 2598 01:28:10,383 --> 01:28:13,933 or wife there so yeah five men in the house 2599 01:28:14,666 --> 01:28:16,250 we had that when I was a kid 2600 01:28:16,433 --> 01:28:20,033 we there were four of us boys and and of course my dad 2601 01:28:20,033 --> 01:28:23,366 we only we didn't even have male or female pets 2602 01:28:23,383 --> 01:28:25,983 our our cats and our dogs yeah 2603 01:28:25,983 --> 01:28:27,466 both my dogs are even boys 2604 01:28:27,466 --> 01:28:29,933 both dogs are both dogs here are boys yeah 2605 01:28:31,233 --> 01:28:33,283 your poor wife yeah 2606 01:28:33,500 --> 01:28:34,500 but yeah so I mean 2607 01:28:34,500 --> 01:28:35,983 that's I know you have more questions 2608 01:28:35,983 --> 01:28:37,300 but that that was my thing 2609 01:28:37,300 --> 01:28:37,666 you know 2610 01:28:37,666 --> 01:28:42,200 is I just wanted to make sure that my guys you know 2611 01:28:42,583 --> 01:28:47,100 had a level of comfort as it related to with their dad 2612 01:28:47,100 --> 01:28:49,700 yeah how their dad would would show up in their life 2613 01:28:49,700 --> 01:28:51,466 how do they how do they experience that 2614 01:28:51,466 --> 01:28:52,633 how do they feel about that 2615 01:28:52,633 --> 01:28:56,083 do you think what is their you know I mean 2616 01:28:57,550 --> 01:28:59,350 like it was somebody there was like 2617 01:28:59,350 --> 01:29:01,833 we had this movie show me the father 2618 01:29:01,833 --> 01:29:03,783 uh huh and they actually interview for the 2619 01:29:03,783 --> 01:29:04,583 by the king's brother 2620 01:29:04,583 --> 01:29:06,683 but they didn't use my son's pieces 2621 01:29:06,950 --> 01:29:08,850 but they had asked the guys like 2622 01:29:09,033 --> 01:29:11,533 what is it like growing up with your dad and all this 2623 01:29:11,550 --> 01:29:13,583 and I wouldn't sit in there in the back with Q cards 2624 01:29:13,583 --> 01:29:13,900 like hey 2625 01:29:13,900 --> 01:29:14,966 we didn't even guys 2626 01:29:15,500 --> 01:29:17,166 I wasn't even in there you guys 2627 01:29:17,233 --> 01:29:18,633 and it was really strong what they say 2628 01:29:18,633 --> 01:29:20,883 you know all the things we learn from our dad 2629 01:29:20,950 --> 01:29:22,550 you know teaches us respect 2630 01:29:22,550 --> 01:29:24,783 and this hard work and all these different things 2631 01:29:24,783 --> 01:29:26,783 the things that the dad that 2632 01:29:26,783 --> 01:29:29,583 any dad worth his salt will want to hear from his sons 2633 01:29:29,583 --> 01:29:31,800 because you you putting so much into them 2634 01:29:32,150 --> 01:29:33,150 you know and 2635 01:29:33,150 --> 01:29:35,966 and trying to you know 2636 01:29:35,983 --> 01:29:37,550 be the fine line of look 2637 01:29:37,550 --> 01:29:39,033 I'm trying to instill some things 2638 01:29:39,033 --> 01:29:39,550 because 2639 01:29:39,550 --> 01:29:41,650 there were some things I Learned from that hardship 2640 01:29:42,183 --> 01:29:43,133 you know 2641 01:29:43,466 --> 01:29:46,066 there's things I Learned from not having electric 2642 01:29:46,066 --> 01:29:47,266 there's some things I not 2643 01:29:47,266 --> 01:29:47,433 that 2644 01:29:47,433 --> 01:29:50,783 I Learned from the adversity that I had to deal with 2645 01:29:50,783 --> 01:29:52,700 so you you know you 2646 01:29:52,700 --> 01:29:55,250 you gotta balance that cause I want 2647 01:29:55,300 --> 01:29:57,466 I wanna raise well rounded men 2648 01:29:57,466 --> 01:29:58,666 yeah you know what I'm saying 2649 01:29:58,666 --> 01:30:00,083 and the thing for me 2650 01:30:00,350 --> 01:30:02,100 I've been able to build a life that 2651 01:30:02,100 --> 01:30:04,883 these guys didn't have to experience 2652 01:30:05,466 --> 01:30:07,200 some of the things or live 2653 01:30:07,233 --> 01:30:09,333 and it mean shoot we 2654 01:30:09,900 --> 01:30:11,266 these guys live real good 2655 01:30:11,266 --> 01:30:12,150 you know what I'm saying yeah 2656 01:30:12,150 --> 01:30:13,383 these guys live good you know what I'm saying 2657 01:30:13,383 --> 01:30:14,550 so you still you know 2658 01:30:14,550 --> 01:30:16,233 I'm still you know 2659 01:30:16,233 --> 01:30:17,583 I keep them grounded 2660 01:30:17,583 --> 01:30:22,200 and everything that your dad has and that they have 2661 01:30:22,266 --> 01:30:23,683 you got through hard work 2662 01:30:23,683 --> 01:30:24,983 uh huh you got work 2663 01:30:24,983 --> 01:30:26,100 you got work you got work 2664 01:30:26,100 --> 01:30:27,733 you got work and all my sons 2665 01:30:27,866 --> 01:30:29,583 they get that they get that 2666 01:30:29,583 --> 01:30:31,100 you know and you got work to get 2667 01:30:31,100 --> 01:30:31,750 you got work to get 2668 01:30:31,750 --> 01:30:33,266 you got do these things you know 2669 01:30:33,266 --> 01:30:34,950 so they understand it and they 2670 01:30:34,950 --> 01:30:35,983 and they see it from living it 2671 01:30:35,983 --> 01:30:36,866 cause they seen it with me 2672 01:30:36,866 --> 01:30:37,466 they like 2673 01:30:37,466 --> 01:30:40,100 my dad ain't sitting up some type of charm life 2674 01:30:40,100 --> 01:30:42,200 just living up they see how hard you work 2675 01:30:42,550 --> 01:30:43,666 it's I gotta go get it 2676 01:30:43,666 --> 01:30:44,383 you know he gotta 2677 01:30:44,383 --> 01:30:45,833 he got things he gotta overcome 2678 01:30:45,833 --> 01:30:48,066 there's adversities that I'm seeing to my dad 2679 01:30:48,066 --> 01:30:50,150 he gotta deal with he gotta overcome stuff 2680 01:30:50,150 --> 01:30:51,766 you know so 2681 01:30:51,783 --> 01:30:52,066 you know 2682 01:30:52,066 --> 01:30:54,466 they see these things and I want them to grow from it 2683 01:30:54,466 --> 01:30:55,300 too and they see look 2684 01:30:55,300 --> 01:30:57,300 I ain't perfect you know 2685 01:30:57,300 --> 01:30:59,383 but we talking about you know 2686 01:30:59,383 --> 01:31:01,050 perfection versus intention 2687 01:31:01,233 --> 01:31:03,783 you know or intention over perfection 2688 01:31:03,783 --> 01:31:05,400 as relates to my sons 2689 01:31:06,666 --> 01:31:10,233 my intention is to be as perfect as I can be for them 2690 01:31:10,233 --> 01:31:11,033 guys 2691 01:31:11,350 --> 01:31:15,100 and like I said I want still a long time 2692 01:31:15,100 --> 01:31:17,566 I mean I sit up at night with some of the stuff 2693 01:31:17,666 --> 01:31:18,783 you know where 2694 01:31:18,783 --> 01:31:21,350 I was seeing examples of guys that I didn't want to be 2695 01:31:21,350 --> 01:31:23,466 yeah and I was building my 2696 01:31:23,466 --> 01:31:27,650 my mental resume and building my mental reservoir of 2697 01:31:28,150 --> 01:31:29,500 won't do that won't do that 2698 01:31:29,500 --> 01:31:32,066 I'll be the I'll be on the other side of the universe 2699 01:31:32,066 --> 01:31:33,466 of that action yeah 2700 01:31:33,466 --> 01:31:36,950 I'll be on the other side of the universe of belief on 2701 01:31:36,950 --> 01:31:38,166 in what in my sons 2702 01:31:38,183 --> 01:31:40,483 I'll be on over of patience 2703 01:31:40,633 --> 01:31:41,350 uh huh and 2704 01:31:41,350 --> 01:31:43,583 and want my sons to be the best 2705 01:31:43,583 --> 01:31:46,550 that they can be and and they'll never walk away saying 2706 01:31:46,550 --> 01:31:51,750 my dad he kind of short changed me on that no no yeah 2707 01:31:51,750 --> 01:31:54,300 you have this library of counter examples in your mind 2708 01:31:54,300 --> 01:31:55,983 you learn so well from counter example 2709 01:31:55,983 --> 01:31:58,250 it seems exactly yes 2710 01:31:58,433 --> 01:31:59,466 I love that I like I 2711 01:31:59,466 --> 01:32:01,483 I like to uh 2712 01:32:01,500 --> 01:32:04,283 finish up these interviews by asking 2713 01:32:04,750 --> 01:32:06,900 I'll put you on the spot here for 2714 01:32:06,900 --> 01:32:09,333 for a moment and ask you like if you 2715 01:32:09,633 --> 01:32:12,483 if you could share just one principle 2716 01:32:12,833 --> 01:32:14,583 just distill I don't know 2717 01:32:14,583 --> 01:32:16,100 all your your 2718 01:32:16,100 --> 01:32:18,033 your your knowledge or 2719 01:32:18,033 --> 01:32:18,666 or you know 2720 01:32:18,666 --> 01:32:19,466 it doesn't even have to be 2721 01:32:19,466 --> 01:32:21,150 it doesn't have to be an all encompassing principle 2722 01:32:21,150 --> 01:32:22,433 but if you could share one principle 2723 01:32:22,433 --> 01:32:24,150 about what it takes uh 2724 01:32:24,150 --> 01:32:26,466 uh or what helps to guide you in 2725 01:32:26,466 --> 01:32:30,083 in in raising excellent men 2726 01:32:30,666 --> 01:32:32,366 um what would that be 2727 01:32:32,466 --> 01:32:34,000 or being an excellent man yourself 2728 01:32:34,833 --> 01:32:36,083 yeah I mean 2729 01:32:36,233 --> 01:32:38,700 like I said and I use this in football a lot too 2730 01:32:38,700 --> 01:32:39,650 you know 2731 01:32:41,583 --> 01:32:44,133 it is not cheesy it kind of is what it's kind of a road 2732 01:32:44,150 --> 01:32:47,783 it's a roadmap I use for football and for life 2733 01:32:47,783 --> 01:32:50,366 being detailed dependable and disciplined 2734 01:32:50,983 --> 01:32:52,466 so being detailed and 2735 01:32:52,466 --> 01:32:54,283 you know what you're supposed to do 2736 01:32:54,633 --> 01:32:56,150 so we talk about football okay 2737 01:32:56,150 --> 01:32:57,866 I know I'm supposed to do this run here 2738 01:32:57,866 --> 01:32:59,350 whatever you can say it 2739 01:32:59,350 --> 01:33:01,633 I know it I know as a 2740 01:33:01,633 --> 01:33:05,633 as a young man or as a father or as a husband or what 2741 01:33:05,633 --> 01:33:08,450 what I'm supposed to do you can say that dependable 2742 01:33:08,550 --> 01:33:11,333 you apply those details consistently 2743 01:33:11,900 --> 01:33:15,383 so if I'm supposed to do these things 2744 01:33:15,383 --> 01:33:17,466 work this way pay this Bill 2745 01:33:17,466 --> 01:33:19,150 whatever it is it's so many the 2746 01:33:19,150 --> 01:33:19,350 the the 2747 01:33:19,350 --> 01:33:20,033 the balloon I mean 2748 01:33:20,033 --> 01:33:21,983 that umbrella is is unbelievable 2749 01:33:21,983 --> 01:33:24,383 and to me the last one is the most important one 2750 01:33:24,383 --> 01:33:27,766 discipline I'm dependable when it matters the most 2751 01:33:28,666 --> 01:33:29,733 so 2752 01:33:30,383 --> 01:33:32,266 you've created a criteria 2753 01:33:32,266 --> 01:33:33,933 for how you wanna live your life 2754 01:33:34,066 --> 01:33:35,666 and even in the rough times 2755 01:33:35,666 --> 01:33:37,166 that's when it mattered the most 2756 01:33:37,783 --> 01:33:38,633 yeah are you 2757 01:33:38,633 --> 01:33:40,900 that's how you know when the rough times come on 2758 01:33:40,900 --> 01:33:42,350 do you do the thing or do you not 2759 01:33:42,350 --> 01:33:43,866 because that's how you know 2760 01:33:43,866 --> 01:33:44,833 are you own you know 2761 01:33:44,833 --> 01:33:45,633 I'm saying and and 2762 01:33:45,633 --> 01:33:49,066 and it's a it's a nice road map and 2763 01:33:49,066 --> 01:33:51,466 or the guardrails and sometimes you 2764 01:33:51,466 --> 01:33:53,050 I go crashing over the guardrail 2765 01:33:54,833 --> 01:33:56,666 that's life but if you 2766 01:33:56,666 --> 01:33:58,666 if you kind of frame it to me when it 2767 01:33:58,666 --> 01:34:00,483 when it's framed that way 2768 01:34:00,600 --> 01:34:03,300 you know because the details are hard work 2769 01:34:03,300 --> 01:34:04,383 all these things there's so many 2770 01:34:04,383 --> 01:34:05,983 there's a million things under each of them 2771 01:34:05,983 --> 01:34:07,150 but it all start with the details 2772 01:34:07,150 --> 01:34:08,333 you gotta know first 2773 01:34:08,550 --> 01:34:11,883 and that's my job as a parent or as a coach or whatever 2774 01:34:12,383 --> 01:34:15,866 give these guys the tools to give them what they need 2775 01:34:15,866 --> 01:34:16,150 hey man 2776 01:34:16,150 --> 01:34:18,483 this is this is the detail yeah 2777 01:34:18,483 --> 01:34:19,500 so you can't say man 2778 01:34:19,500 --> 01:34:21,233 you undisciplined undisciplined about what 2779 01:34:21,233 --> 01:34:23,300 undisciplined about this I never knew the detail 2780 01:34:23,300 --> 01:34:23,783 right yeah 2781 01:34:23,783 --> 01:34:26,350 I had I didn't I didn't know what the thing was 2782 01:34:26,350 --> 01:34:27,783 I didn't even know where to start yeah 2783 01:34:27,783 --> 01:34:29,183 I had I didn't have it to start you 2784 01:34:29,183 --> 01:34:31,550 you hold me to the to the discipline aspect 2785 01:34:31,550 --> 01:34:32,866 I never knew the detail that's right 2786 01:34:32,866 --> 01:34:34,383 I never had a chance to be dependable 2787 01:34:34,383 --> 01:34:35,766 cause I never knew the detail right 2788 01:34:35,933 --> 01:34:38,633 so it all comes back to those things 2789 01:34:38,633 --> 01:34:41,366 you know so I'm consistently 2790 01:34:41,900 --> 01:34:44,100 perpetually trying to give the detail 2791 01:34:44,100 --> 01:34:44,900 mm hmm 2792 01:34:45,300 --> 01:34:47,466 whether it be from my own experience yeah 2793 01:34:47,466 --> 01:34:49,350 or their experience the detail 2794 01:34:49,350 --> 01:34:50,600 the detail the detail 2795 01:34:50,750 --> 01:34:52,783 and then holding them 2796 01:34:52,783 --> 01:34:55,233 those guys and myself to be independent 2797 01:34:55,233 --> 01:34:58,283 I'm not applying the details on a consistent basis yeah 2798 01:34:58,300 --> 01:34:59,150 and then again 2799 01:34:59,150 --> 01:35:01,283 when the rubber really hit the road hardcore 2800 01:35:01,350 --> 01:35:01,783 you know 2801 01:35:01,783 --> 01:35:04,866 forking the road or crazy stuff or whatever hey man 2802 01:35:04,866 --> 01:35:06,983 is your discipline you know 2803 01:35:06,983 --> 01:35:10,566 are you on top of it when it matters the most 2804 01:35:10,666 --> 01:35:11,700 when it matters the most 2805 01:35:11,700 --> 01:35:14,550 so those are the things right there and and to me 2806 01:35:14,550 --> 01:35:16,833 all the stuff hard work every 2807 01:35:16,833 --> 01:35:20,883 every sub category falls under the initial detail yeah 2808 01:35:21,383 --> 01:35:24,150 the detail of being a whatever you know 2809 01:35:24,150 --> 01:35:27,750 I'm saying these guys want to be so yeah yeah 2810 01:35:27,750 --> 01:35:30,066 one of my one of my principles is 2811 01:35:30,066 --> 01:35:31,733 is that excellence is failure 2812 01:35:32,183 --> 01:35:34,066 the only way to achieve excellence is to 2813 01:35:34,066 --> 01:35:35,483 is to constantly fail 2814 01:35:35,583 --> 01:35:37,800 and then just fail less and less each time 2815 01:35:38,350 --> 01:35:41,683 and and the only way you can know 2816 01:35:42,583 --> 01:35:45,233 whether you're failing is to know what success is 2817 01:35:45,233 --> 01:35:47,300 and that's the detail yep 2818 01:35:47,300 --> 01:35:48,966 exactly and then 2819 01:35:48,983 --> 01:35:52,383 you know the rest of it is being consistent and and 2820 01:35:52,383 --> 01:35:54,300 and yeah having the no 2821 01:35:54,300 --> 01:35:55,233 know what the values are 2822 01:35:55,233 --> 01:35:59,950 and then go execute them is really what it's about and 2823 01:35:59,950 --> 01:36:02,450 and like I said what I gave you is like a compressed 2824 01:36:02,550 --> 01:36:04,750 right all encompassing to me 2825 01:36:04,750 --> 01:36:07,550 cause it kind of could cover everything yeah 2826 01:36:07,550 --> 01:36:10,133 it covers everything and I tell them that's 2827 01:36:10,550 --> 01:36:11,983 and you're just your regular 2828 01:36:11,983 --> 01:36:12,783 you know 2829 01:36:13,300 --> 01:36:16,083 just everyday life football 2830 01:36:16,100 --> 01:36:17,700 everything being a brother 2831 01:36:17,700 --> 01:36:20,266 being a boyfriend all these things 2832 01:36:20,266 --> 01:36:20,700 I said man 2833 01:36:20,700 --> 01:36:21,983 when you come back then like God 2834 01:36:21,983 --> 01:36:22,783 you know you 2835 01:36:22,783 --> 01:36:25,266 you quickly I knew what I was supposed to do 2836 01:36:25,266 --> 01:36:26,783 I knew it I knew what I was supposed to do 2837 01:36:26,783 --> 01:36:28,550 and I knew I was you know 2838 01:36:28,550 --> 01:36:30,100 I did this so many times 2839 01:36:30,100 --> 01:36:31,950 but I didn't do it when it mattered 2840 01:36:31,950 --> 01:36:32,750 it mattered yeah 2841 01:36:32,750 --> 01:36:35,183 I didn't on this on that day 2842 01:36:35,183 --> 01:36:36,983 on this instance I didn't do it 2843 01:36:36,983 --> 01:36:41,033 but to but having that chronology of how it goes 2844 01:36:41,033 --> 01:36:41,633 I mean it's 2845 01:36:41,633 --> 01:36:42,500 it's something that 2846 01:36:42,500 --> 01:36:44,533 it's really been beneficial in football 2847 01:36:44,783 --> 01:36:47,550 been a been a official off the field too 2848 01:36:47,550 --> 01:36:49,350 it's the same principle it's the same yeah 2849 01:36:49,350 --> 01:36:51,000 it's the same so 2850 01:36:51,100 --> 01:36:51,750 you know I 2851 01:36:51,750 --> 01:36:52,866 I'll I'll tell guys 2852 01:36:52,866 --> 01:36:54,683 you know even on the spiritual side 2853 01:36:55,183 --> 01:36:56,633 even just in they dealings with guys 2854 01:36:56,633 --> 01:36:57,150 I say man 2855 01:36:57,150 --> 01:37:00,683 you either are you a blessing or a lesson 2856 01:37:00,950 --> 01:37:01,383 so you're 2857 01:37:01,383 --> 01:37:03,066 you're a blessing or a lesson 2858 01:37:03,066 --> 01:37:03,583 you know if I'm 2859 01:37:03,583 --> 01:37:04,683 you're a lesson I'm 2860 01:37:05,066 --> 01:37:07,500 I and I think of all them guys the 2861 01:37:07,500 --> 01:37:09,033 the some of the stuff that I 2862 01:37:09,033 --> 01:37:11,300 that I'm not proud that I was around and experience 2863 01:37:11,300 --> 01:37:11,833 yeah and 2864 01:37:11,833 --> 01:37:13,566 and them you know 2865 01:37:13,866 --> 01:37:14,300 them you 2866 01:37:14,300 --> 01:37:15,433 you may look at it like no 2867 01:37:15,433 --> 01:37:17,666 them guys were a burden them guys were a disaster 2868 01:37:17,666 --> 01:37:18,466 no they were a lesson 2869 01:37:18,466 --> 01:37:19,283 yeah that's right 2870 01:37:19,900 --> 01:37:21,250 it was a lesson yeah 2871 01:37:21,350 --> 01:37:22,833 so I always tell my mom that 2872 01:37:22,833 --> 01:37:23,850 I said look 2873 01:37:23,866 --> 01:37:25,233 you know she'll reflect back 2874 01:37:25,233 --> 01:37:28,633 and she's really apologetic about some of those things 2875 01:37:28,633 --> 01:37:30,283 whatever I said nah 2876 01:37:30,283 --> 01:37:31,233 I said first of all 2877 01:37:31,233 --> 01:37:32,350 it worked out yeah 2878 01:37:32,350 --> 01:37:34,950 now if I was sitting in jail writing a jailhouse memoir 2879 01:37:34,950 --> 01:37:35,783 yeah you'd be like 2880 01:37:35,783 --> 01:37:36,983 what the heck talking something different 2881 01:37:36,983 --> 01:37:38,750 maybe we have a different conversation 2882 01:37:38,750 --> 01:37:39,700 yeah I said 2883 01:37:39,700 --> 01:37:40,550 but no 2884 01:37:40,550 --> 01:37:44,033 all that stuff just gave me the other perspective 2885 01:37:44,033 --> 01:37:46,783 and it hammered it like thousands of times 2886 01:37:46,783 --> 01:37:49,800 hammered in my head what I wanted to be as a father 2887 01:37:50,150 --> 01:37:51,666 yeah what I wanted to be as a father 2888 01:37:51,666 --> 01:37:54,300 so and that same father aspect again 2889 01:37:54,300 --> 01:37:57,533 when you talk about my players and people I run into 2890 01:37:57,733 --> 01:37:59,066 you may not be looking for a father 2891 01:37:59,066 --> 01:38:00,566 but i'mma treat you like my son 2892 01:38:00,583 --> 01:38:03,500 that same overflow goes there 2893 01:38:03,500 --> 01:38:05,066 so I love that 2894 01:38:05,066 --> 01:38:07,550 and that is a beautiful place to end it 2895 01:38:07,550 --> 01:38:09,500 Dylan Mccalla uh 2896 01:38:09,500 --> 01:38:11,866 is the running back coach for the 2897 01:38:11,866 --> 01:38:13,450 the Las Vegas Raiders 2898 01:38:13,866 --> 01:38:17,550 and the co author of the book runs in the family 2899 01:38:17,550 --> 01:38:18,966 uh absolutely 2900 01:38:19,433 --> 01:38:23,550 absolutely strong recommendation to go look at that 2901 01:38:23,550 --> 01:38:26,100 and man I want this movie to come out 2902 01:38:26,100 --> 01:38:27,350 my friend please 2903 01:38:27,350 --> 01:38:29,983 please make that happen I can't wait for it 2904 01:38:29,983 --> 01:38:34,766 thank you so much for being part of raising men 2905 01:38:35,700 --> 01:38:37,066 the the name itself 2906 01:38:37,066 --> 01:38:39,033 I had to jump in when I seen that 2907 01:38:39,033 --> 01:38:40,150 I'm like I'm in 2908 01:38:40,150 --> 01:38:41,066 well I love it 2909 01:38:41,066 --> 01:38:42,450 thank you this can't go anywhere 2910 01:38:42,783 --> 01:38:44,783 I appreciate it I hope we can stick in touch 2911 01:38:44,783 --> 01:38:46,450 I hope we can keep in touch 2912 01:38:46,750 --> 01:38:47,866 no doubt I appreciate you 2913 01:38:47,866 --> 01:38:49,750 and to all our listeners and all our viewers 2914 01:38:49,750 --> 01:38:52,783 thank you for joining us for this amazing discussion 2915 01:38:52,783 --> 01:38:55,600 remember that you are a great parent 2916 01:39:03,300 --> 01:39:06,733 raising men is produced by Phil Hernandez 2917 01:39:06,983 --> 01:39:10,133 this episode was edited by Ralph Tolentino