1 01:00:01,250 --> 01:00:04,125 Good morning and 2 01:00:04,125 --> 01:00:06,583 welcome to Morning Cereal. 3 01:00:08,833 --> 01:00:13,458 All right, good morning everyone and 4 01:00:13,458 --> 01:00:14,625 welcome to Thursday. 5 01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:17,333 You are now close enough to the weekend 6 01:00:17,333 --> 01:00:18,666 to start thinking about 7 01:00:18,666 --> 01:00:19,916 what pizza you're going 8 01:00:19,916 --> 01:00:20,791 to buy for Friday 9 01:00:20,791 --> 01:00:21,833 night pizza night, right? 10 01:00:22,291 --> 01:00:24,875 But it also is still far enough away that 11 01:00:24,875 --> 01:00:26,041 you still have to act 12 01:00:26,041 --> 01:00:27,125 like a functioning adult 13 01:00:27,291 --> 01:00:28,375 or a functioning student 14 01:00:28,375 --> 01:00:30,041 for just a little bit longer. 15 01:00:30,458 --> 01:00:32,125 All right, well, let's hit our morning 16 01:00:32,125 --> 01:00:33,250 stride here with a quote 17 01:00:33,250 --> 01:00:36,166 from Jay Z who said, "You 18 01:00:36,166 --> 01:00:39,000 can want success all you want, but to get 19 01:00:39,000 --> 01:00:40,875 it, you can't falter. 20 01:00:40,875 --> 01:00:41,625 You can't slip. 21 01:00:42,041 --> 01:00:43,125 You can't sleep." 22 01:00:44,125 --> 01:00:44,875 Now, don't worry. 23 01:00:44,875 --> 01:00:46,458 He's not saying don't sleep literally. 24 01:00:47,125 --> 01:00:48,583 He's saying action and 25 01:00:48,583 --> 01:00:50,333 consistency is the plan. 26 01:00:50,833 --> 01:00:52,375 Wishing and hoping are not strategy. 27 01:00:53,000 --> 01:00:53,666 Action is. 28 01:00:54,416 --> 01:00:55,791 A helpful nudge when your 29 01:00:55,791 --> 01:00:57,750 motivation is, well, still in bed. 30 01:00:58,458 --> 01:00:59,958 Okay, well, here are your four moments 31 01:00:59,958 --> 01:01:01,958 that matter for December 4th. 32 01:01:02,208 --> 01:01:03,541 Starting back in 1997, 33 01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:04,833 do you remember this? 34 01:01:05,250 --> 01:01:08,166 The NBA, they suspended Latrell Spreewell 35 01:01:08,166 --> 01:01:09,166 for one year for 36 01:01:09,166 --> 01:01:11,750 attacking his coach, PJ Carlesamo. 37 01:01:12,333 --> 01:01:12,875 All right, number two, 38 01:01:13,250 --> 01:01:15,083 today is National Sock Day. 39 01:01:15,083 --> 01:01:17,125 So throw on your most obnoxious pair of 40 01:01:17,125 --> 01:01:19,083 socks and wear them proudly. 41 01:01:19,500 --> 01:01:20,500 Then put them away 42 01:01:20,500 --> 01:01:21,791 nicely until next year. 43 01:01:22,125 --> 01:01:22,916 All right, number three. 44 01:01:22,916 --> 01:01:24,583 The number one song on this date back in 45 01:01:24,583 --> 01:01:27,458 2009 was "An Empire State 46 01:01:27,458 --> 01:01:28,916 of Mind" by Jay Z featuring 47 01:01:28,916 --> 01:01:29,791 Alicia Keys. 48 01:01:29,791 --> 01:01:32,000 Now, this was a great song that just adds 49 01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:32,875 to that special 50 01:01:32,875 --> 01:01:34,875 really sexy New York vibe. 51 01:01:35,333 --> 01:01:37,416 And then fourthly, happy birthday to you. 52 01:01:37,416 --> 01:01:38,333 Today is your birthday. 53 01:01:38,708 --> 01:01:39,708 You share it with 54 01:01:39,708 --> 01:01:41,500 supermodel and host Tyra Banks. 55 01:01:41,500 --> 01:01:42,500 She's 52 today. 56 01:01:43,083 --> 01:01:45,041 Rapper and conglomerate Jay Z. 57 01:01:45,041 --> 01:01:46,208 He's 56 today. 58 01:01:46,875 --> 01:01:47,791 Actress Marisa Tomei. 59 01:01:47,791 --> 01:01:48,583 She's 61. 60 01:01:49,166 --> 01:01:50,583 Actor and legendary 61 01:01:50,583 --> 01:01:52,625 storyteller Jeff Bridges. 62 01:01:52,833 --> 01:01:54,333 And turned 76 today. 63 01:01:54,916 --> 01:01:56,541 All right, well, let's jump into our book 64 01:01:56,541 --> 01:01:58,291 review of Mel Robbins, 65 01:01:58,708 --> 01:01:59,708 "The Let Them Theory." 66 01:02:00,458 --> 01:02:02,541 Today we are diving into the first of 67 01:02:02,541 --> 01:02:04,916 three pillars of friendship, proximity. 68 01:02:05,750 --> 01:02:08,458 Robbins brings an aha moment 69 01:02:08,458 --> 01:02:09,625 right out of the gate here. 70 01:02:10,291 --> 01:02:11,916 "You become closest to 71 01:02:11,916 --> 01:02:14,208 whoever you see the most often." 72 01:02:15,666 --> 01:02:17,541 Well, that sounds a little obvious, but 73 01:02:17,541 --> 01:02:18,666 in adulthood, we tend 74 01:02:18,666 --> 01:02:19,916 to forget how powerful 75 01:02:19,916 --> 01:02:21,208 simple nearness is. 76 01:02:22,166 --> 01:02:23,750 Robbins points out that everything from 77 01:02:23,750 --> 01:02:25,041 childhood friendships to 78 01:02:25,041 --> 01:02:27,000 college bonds, they're formed 79 01:02:27,041 --> 01:02:28,625 because of repeated casual 80 01:02:28,625 --> 01:02:29,875 interaction with each other. 81 01:02:30,333 --> 01:02:31,666 They're not deep talks. 82 01:02:31,666 --> 01:02:33,125 They're not matching interests. 83 01:02:33,833 --> 01:02:35,916 Closeness happened because you physically 84 01:02:35,916 --> 01:02:38,958 occupied the same spaces repeatedly. 85 01:02:39,750 --> 01:02:42,500 Now, Robbins writes, "Proximity creates 86 01:02:42,500 --> 01:02:45,083 comfort, and comfort creates connection." 87 01:02:46,250 --> 01:02:47,208 In adulthood, 88 01:02:47,791 --> 01:02:49,500 proximity becomes fractured. 89 01:02:50,416 --> 01:02:51,166 Relationships will move you. 90 01:02:52,083 --> 01:02:53,500 Relationships shift your routines. 91 01:02:54,125 --> 01:02:55,625 Kids rearrange your world. 92 01:02:56,250 --> 01:02:57,958 And suddenly, friends who once lived 93 01:02:57,958 --> 01:02:59,125 right next to your heart 94 01:02:59,125 --> 01:03:00,875 now live three time zones 95 01:03:01,041 --> 01:03:03,625 away, literally or emotionally maybe. 96 01:03:04,208 --> 01:03:06,000 Now Robbins emphasizes that 97 01:03:06,000 --> 01:03:07,750 this isn't personal failure. 98 01:03:08,125 --> 01:03:09,291 It's just logistics. 99 01:03:09,916 --> 01:03:12,125 And understanding this frees you from 100 01:03:12,125 --> 01:03:14,041 taking distance personally. 101 01:03:14,583 --> 01:03:16,916 If someone isn't as close anymore, it may 102 01:03:16,916 --> 01:03:19,041 simply be proximity doing its thing. 103 01:03:19,750 --> 01:03:21,916 Your biggest insight here is practical. 104 01:03:22,791 --> 01:03:25,000 If you want to deepen a friendship, 105 01:03:25,500 --> 01:03:26,791 increase your proximity. 106 01:03:27,166 --> 01:03:27,916 It's that simple. 107 01:03:28,833 --> 01:03:30,458 Not in an overwhelming way, 108 01:03:30,458 --> 01:03:32,166 but in tiny, consistent touches. 109 01:03:32,708 --> 01:03:35,166 Quick check-ins, shared errands, short 110 01:03:35,166 --> 01:03:36,541 hangouts, popping by, 111 01:03:36,833 --> 01:03:38,500 saying yes to small invites. 112 01:03:39,041 --> 01:03:39,791 Proximity doesn't 113 01:03:39,791 --> 01:03:41,833 require these grand gestures. 114 01:03:42,208 --> 01:03:43,541 It requires frequency. 115 01:03:44,875 --> 01:03:46,000 Here is your Thursday takeaway. 116 01:03:47,250 --> 01:03:48,625 This grows where time 117 01:03:48,625 --> 01:03:49,833 and presence overlap. 118 01:03:50,375 --> 01:03:51,500 Proximity is the quiet 119 01:03:51,500 --> 01:03:53,458 engine of every strong friendship. 120 01:03:54,333 --> 01:03:56,291 Alright, well it is Friday Eve, people. 121 01:03:56,666 --> 01:03:58,166 Be close to the good stuff today. 122 01:03:58,166 --> 01:03:59,166 The good people, the good 123 01:03:59,166 --> 01:04:00,833 energy, and those good moments. 124 01:04:01,208 --> 01:04:02,791 Hey, thanks for being here with us on 125 01:04:02,791 --> 01:04:03,791 Morning Serial today. 126 01:04:03,791 --> 01:04:04,666 We will see you back 127 01:04:04,666 --> 01:04:06,083 here tomorrow on a Friday. 128 01:04:06,750 --> 01:04:09,000 And until then, have a fantastic day. 129 01:04:09,541 --> 01:04:11,791 Don't forget to follow and subscribe to 130 01:04:11,791 --> 01:04:12,458 the Morning Serial 131 01:04:12,458 --> 01:04:14,541 podcast on the One Life Live 132 01:04:14,541 --> 01:04:15,000 It channel. 133 01:04:15,625 --> 01:04:17,500 You can find more episodes and videos by 134 01:04:17,500 --> 01:04:18,250 visiting our YouTube 135 01:04:18,250 --> 01:04:19,541 channel and the website 136 01:04:19,625 --> 01:04:21,541 at seanenglishless and at 137 01:04:21,541 --> 01:04:23,666 seanenglish.com, where you can also 138 01:04:23,666 --> 01:04:25,458 follow our other podcast, the 139 01:04:25,458 --> 01:04:26,625 Mr. and Mrs. English podcast 140 01:04:26,625 --> 01:04:28,333 and the Life Happens podcast. 141 01:04:29,166 --> 01:04:31,291 And these other podcasts will dive deeper 142 01:04:31,291 --> 01:04:32,208 into everyday issues, 143 01:04:32,500 --> 01:04:33,250 self-improvement and 144 01:04:33,333 --> 01:04:35,750 well-being, business and finance, and we 145 01:04:35,750 --> 01:04:37,000 welcome special guests too. 146 01:04:37,500 --> 01:04:38,250 So join us. 147 01:04:38,250 --> 01:04:39,541 It will be a good time, I promise. 148 01:04:40,250 --> 01:04:41,333 Thanks again for listening. 149 01:04:41,333 --> 01:04:42,500 Have a fantastic day, 150 01:04:42,500 --> 01:04:43,458 and we'll see you tomorrow.