1 00:00:00,300 --> 00:00:03,303 Feels good to be here again. It does? Yeah. 2 00:00:03,570 --> 00:00:05,805 So what did you do? Just breeze in here? 3 00:00:05,805 --> 00:00:07,374 Just breeze in here? Yeah. Yeah. That's right. 4 00:00:07,374 --> 00:00:10,343 So I have my jacket on, you know, but, Yeah. 5 00:00:10,343 --> 00:00:12,112 Yeah. It's been a busy morning here. 6 00:00:12,112 --> 00:00:13,346 You out there running errands? 7 00:00:13,346 --> 00:00:15,482 And how was your day today? 8 00:00:15,482 --> 00:00:16,683 It was. It wasn't. 9 00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:19,686 And it was an interesting day, you know, 10 00:00:21,821 --> 00:00:23,690 Our show is about today. 11 00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:25,425 We're going to talk about. 12 00:00:25,425 --> 00:00:28,428 What are we talking about? 13 00:00:28,628 --> 00:00:29,963 We're talking about. 14 00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:32,732 You're asking me to remember that I wake up. 15 00:00:32,732 --> 00:00:33,433 Wake up. 16 00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:34,934 Oh, yeah. Okay. Wake up. 17 00:00:34,934 --> 00:00:37,303 I have my coffee yet, so. 18 00:00:37,303 --> 00:00:39,139 Yeah, I cannot wait. 19 00:00:39,139 --> 00:00:42,142 You know, just deal with water here, Joyce. 20 00:00:44,611 --> 00:00:47,213 So when you woke up today. 21 00:00:47,213 --> 00:00:49,849 You have a great routine in the morning. 22 00:00:49,849 --> 00:00:53,987 You know I tell everyone what you do because I, I'm just so impressed. 23 00:00:54,354 --> 00:00:55,455 When I wake up in the morning. 24 00:00:55,455 --> 00:00:57,724 And I made a concerted effort over the past year 25 00:00:57,724 --> 00:01:01,561 to especially I pretty much done this most of my life choice. 26 00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:05,632 But over the past year it just everything seemed to coincide, 27 00:01:06,199 --> 00:01:08,768 with my faith just getting deeper and deeper each 28 00:01:08,768 --> 00:01:11,805 and every, you know, year for that matter, up to this point. 29 00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:14,340 But I get up in the morning, I do my prayers, 30 00:01:14,340 --> 00:01:16,009 and then I do my gratitude exercises. 31 00:01:16,009 --> 00:01:17,644 What am I grateful for 32 00:01:17,644 --> 00:01:20,647 and who I'm going to get together with during the course of the day? 33 00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,516 So I'm, I'm, I pray for you and your family. 34 00:01:23,516 --> 00:01:26,252 I pray for the folks here that are doing the recording, 35 00:01:26,252 --> 00:01:28,588 you know, Steph and Dave in the back here 36 00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:31,591 and, and just people that are going to be coming in contact with 37 00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:36,062 and and developing that metal armor before I go out into the world. 38 00:01:36,062 --> 00:01:38,064 Because let's face it, the world is crazy right now. 39 00:01:38,064 --> 00:01:39,165 It's crazy in a lot of ways, 40 00:01:39,165 --> 00:01:40,934 but there's a lot of beauty out there too, as well, 41 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:44,671 where you look and then I'll do my yoga and my Pilates exercises. 42 00:01:44,671 --> 00:01:47,640 So it's spirit, mind, body each and every day. 43 00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:50,910 So by the time I walk out of my room in the morning, 44 00:01:50,910 --> 00:01:55,982 7:00, 750 and I have all that done and I'll scurry down the hall, 45 00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:59,486 hang out with the kitty cats, not hang out with my bride. 46 00:01:59,652 --> 00:02:02,522 You know, feed the nerds and just, you know, 47 00:02:03,723 --> 00:02:04,757 kind of plan out the day. 48 00:02:04,757 --> 00:02:07,193 But I don't want anything random to come into my life. 49 00:02:07,193 --> 00:02:08,995 I don't want to check emails. 50 00:02:08,995 --> 00:02:10,663 Yeah. News right away. Yes. 51 00:02:10,663 --> 00:02:13,733 I want to dictate and be intentional about my day right? 52 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,602 Because too many times people run out, they check. 53 00:02:15,602 --> 00:02:20,974 They check the phone, they listen to the news, and then that impacts their day. 54 00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:23,910 And they're really playing from defense at that point, right? 55 00:02:23,910 --> 00:02:26,146 I rather be offensive. Right? 56 00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:27,247 Yeah. So perfect. 57 00:02:27,247 --> 00:02:30,984 And when you say you pray for people, you really do pray for people. 58 00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:32,285 I see it all the time. 59 00:02:32,285 --> 00:02:33,920 So many people are hurting right now. 60 00:02:33,920 --> 00:02:37,724 And it, everybody you run to run into is battling something. 61 00:02:38,224 --> 00:02:40,560 So I try to spend more time doing that. 62 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:44,297 And, and I love when, you know, God puts people in front of me that I can pray 63 00:02:44,297 --> 00:02:45,632 for, be good to him. 64 00:02:45,632 --> 00:02:48,601 I really enjoy doing that. Right. Right. 65 00:02:48,601 --> 00:02:49,869 How about you. 66 00:02:49,869 --> 00:02:54,574 Well you know, it's, it's funny that our show is called, you know, wake up 67 00:02:54,574 --> 00:02:59,546 and we're going to talk about don't keep telling the same story over and over. 68 00:02:59,979 --> 00:03:01,080 And Groundhog Day. 69 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:04,050 Yeah. And I think not 70 00:03:04,050 --> 00:03:07,787 to keep referencing my books, but I think it was in my first book. 71 00:03:07,787 --> 00:03:09,722 Where is your book as some. 72 00:03:09,722 --> 00:03:11,791 That's okay. Is it is it available now? 73 00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:13,927 The abundantly they 74 00:03:13,927 --> 00:03:17,297 both are starving your fears by think and starving your fears right. 75 00:03:17,797 --> 00:03:18,898 I wrote about. 76 00:03:18,898 --> 00:03:21,301 Oh, thank you for holding up my book. 77 00:03:21,301 --> 00:03:22,902 Yeah, well, it's worth it. I read the whole thing. 78 00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:25,371 Okay. Can you tell why I like the color blue? 79 00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:27,840 And I'm wearing a blue and a blue. 80 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:30,243 You got blue, too. 81 00:03:30,243 --> 00:03:33,213 But I talk about, 82 00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:36,182 it, you know, whatever happens in your life 83 00:03:36,783 --> 00:03:41,221 the most, you should tell it's like three people and then be done with it. 84 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,122 So the important people would be, 85 00:03:43,122 --> 00:03:46,125 you know, your spouse, your doctor, your minister. 86 00:03:46,159 --> 00:03:48,861 But after that, if you keep telling the story, your brain 87 00:03:48,861 --> 00:03:53,099 doesn't know the difference between it happening now or happening in the past. 88 00:03:53,399 --> 00:03:56,803 And it keeps you in that state of of agitation. 89 00:03:57,737 --> 00:04:01,274 So what most people don't know, 90 00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:05,445 except for good friends like you or my doctor, 91 00:04:06,546 --> 00:04:07,914 doctors. 92 00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:12,552 Is that three months ago, I was in a pretty bad car accident. 93 00:04:13,286 --> 00:04:17,190 And so people think, oh, you know, Joyce's life is so great. 94 00:04:17,190 --> 00:04:18,725 She's so positive. 95 00:04:18,725 --> 00:04:21,227 So three months ago, it was a challenge. 96 00:04:21,227 --> 00:04:24,430 You know, I got hit head on by someone really shocking. 97 00:04:24,864 --> 00:04:27,133 My grandson's in the car with me. 98 00:04:27,133 --> 00:04:30,136 Ambulance ride, the whole thing. 99 00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:34,774 And the first thing I noticed is that afterwards, 100 00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:39,846 people who knew who were there around there said, who was that person? 101 00:04:39,846 --> 00:04:40,913 Don't you hate them? 102 00:04:40,913 --> 00:04:43,650 Don't you hate him? What's his name? 103 00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:47,587 And I thought, no, I didn't have any feeling like that. 104 00:04:47,587 --> 00:04:51,357 I thought he didn't begin his day thinking, I'm 105 00:04:51,357 --> 00:04:54,360 going to go out and smash my own car up to. 106 00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:58,564 So I prayed for him 107 00:04:59,165 --> 00:05:02,502 and the woman that was in the car with them. 108 00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:03,936 And I never saw them. 109 00:05:03,936 --> 00:05:04,637 You know? 110 00:05:04,637 --> 00:05:06,806 In fact, I don't remember too much 111 00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:10,009 about that except the for some reason, the ambulance ride. 112 00:05:11,110 --> 00:05:12,111 But I 113 00:05:12,111 --> 00:05:15,148 don't like to talk about it because I don't want to keep 114 00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:18,685 reminding my body and my mind 115 00:05:19,218 --> 00:05:22,088 that this terrible thing happened. 116 00:05:22,088 --> 00:05:23,956 It happened. 117 00:05:23,956 --> 00:05:26,025 I'm dealing with it. 118 00:05:26,025 --> 00:05:29,028 And last night 119 00:05:29,796 --> 00:05:33,599 was probably a really tough night in my life because for some reason, 120 00:05:34,267 --> 00:05:36,669 every two hours I was jolted awake 121 00:05:36,669 --> 00:05:39,939 by a new pain shooting up into my head. 122 00:05:40,673 --> 00:05:44,677 And at one point I thought, are you going to die? 123 00:05:45,244 --> 00:05:46,713 And then I thought, you know what? 124 00:05:46,713 --> 00:05:49,449 I'm too tired to go to the emergency room. 125 00:05:49,449 --> 00:05:51,050 So seriously, 126 00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:54,253 if I wake up in the morning, it must mean that I'm supposed to be here. 127 00:05:54,253 --> 00:05:57,390 So when I woke up this morning, I said I'm alive. 128 00:05:57,390 --> 00:05:58,624 I guess I'm supposed to be. 129 00:05:58,624 --> 00:06:03,696 Here, but I love how the fact is, it, you basically forgave this person. 130 00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:06,632 Absolutely. And and that frees you up. 131 00:06:06,632 --> 00:06:09,836 And if you keep going over it and we start developing animus 132 00:06:09,836 --> 00:06:10,903 toward that person, or. 133 00:06:10,903 --> 00:06:14,474 Yes, anger, we keep reliving that accident over and over again. 134 00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:17,076 Right. Same situation over and over again. 135 00:06:17,076 --> 00:06:18,711 And I understand where people are. 136 00:06:18,711 --> 00:06:19,312 They're well-meaning 137 00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:23,282 people who want you upset about, but it doesn't really do any good, right? 138 00:06:23,316 --> 00:06:24,217 It doesn't really do any good. 139 00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:27,353 So we're just better off just to forgive, move on. 140 00:06:27,420 --> 00:06:29,155 We're not forgiving the offense. 141 00:06:29,155 --> 00:06:32,191 We're forgiving for our sake, just to move on. 142 00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:37,397 I thought it was a, a great test, in life also because 143 00:06:38,264 --> 00:06:42,435 just because, we have a strong faith, things happen. 144 00:06:43,269 --> 00:06:46,339 And it's always about how we react to things, 145 00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:49,842 you know, not even the circumstance that happened. 146 00:06:50,343 --> 00:06:54,480 And that's a good point, because when you I learned this from a mentor years ago, 147 00:06:54,814 --> 00:06:57,450 when you respond, practice to respond. 148 00:06:57,450 --> 00:06:59,018 You're in control. 149 00:06:59,018 --> 00:07:02,688 But if you react then the situation of the person is in control. 150 00:07:03,389 --> 00:07:04,857 So respond. 151 00:07:04,857 --> 00:07:07,260 And then you have that control react. 152 00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:10,263 You put that situation. Yeah. Person. Yeah. 153 00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:11,531 It's not easy. 154 00:07:11,531 --> 00:07:15,301 It's not easy to do because you know we our initial reaction 155 00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:17,670 being feelings is anger. 156 00:07:17,670 --> 00:07:18,070 Yeah. 157 00:07:18,070 --> 00:07:20,740 And some people watch you right now were saying how can you forgive. 158 00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:22,942 What are you saying. Easy. What are you. What are you crazy? 159 00:07:22,942 --> 00:07:27,680 And I get that I understand that, but at the same time, I've learned with wisdom 160 00:07:27,847 --> 00:07:31,751 over the years, you know, as we matured or gotten older, you know, just to, 161 00:07:32,885 --> 00:07:36,456 just just to roll with it, the things, like you said, things are going to happen. 162 00:07:36,589 --> 00:07:38,324 Rain falls on the just. 163 00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:40,126 Rain falls on the unjust, like it says. 164 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:43,663 No, absolutely. There was a time in my life 165 00:07:43,663 --> 00:07:47,133 for like years, I am embarrassed to say how many years. 166 00:07:48,167 --> 00:07:50,937 I was really angry with a person. 167 00:07:50,937 --> 00:07:52,839 I mean, I 168 00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:55,374 it was pretty much hatred at times. 169 00:07:55,374 --> 00:07:58,811 And if I wrote it on paper and handed it to someone, why, 170 00:07:59,011 --> 00:08:01,981 you would all agree with me like, whoa. 171 00:08:02,448 --> 00:08:05,451 And not too long ago, 172 00:08:07,353 --> 00:08:09,055 I sat on my bed 173 00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:12,058 and I'll never forget that moment. 174 00:08:12,191 --> 00:08:14,126 And I just shut my I shut my door. 175 00:08:14,126 --> 00:08:17,129 I sat on my bed and I said, God, 176 00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:21,534 I am so tired of being angry at this person. 177 00:08:22,301 --> 00:08:25,505 I don't know what their whole life is like. 178 00:08:25,838 --> 00:08:28,841 I don't know why they are the way they are, 179 00:08:29,075 --> 00:08:31,844 but I'm releasing this to you. 180 00:08:32,979 --> 00:08:36,449 You handle this person, I can't, 181 00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:41,287 and from this moment on and this fight, I said this from this moment on, 182 00:08:42,388 --> 00:08:46,792 I will never speak ill of this person again. 183 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:50,096 I will send love. 184 00:08:50,096 --> 00:08:52,498 I let it go. 185 00:08:52,498 --> 00:08:55,501 And within 48 hours 186 00:08:56,435 --> 00:08:59,438 I got a email from this person. 187 00:08:59,972 --> 00:09:02,942 Years I haven't received an email 188 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:07,179 and the opening line was, Dear Joyce, 189 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:10,917 I have no idea what happened between us, 190 00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:14,287 but I am sure it was my fault. 191 00:09:14,520 --> 00:09:19,025 Is there any way you know we could get together? 192 00:09:19,025 --> 00:09:21,661 I wrote back, absolutely. 193 00:09:21,661 --> 00:09:25,965 And when that person walked in my house, we embraced 194 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:28,434 and it's just done. 195 00:09:28,434 --> 00:09:29,769 What a healing. 196 00:09:29,769 --> 00:09:31,170 I could do a healing. 197 00:09:31,170 --> 00:09:33,706 Let me tell you, John, this went on for 20 years. 198 00:09:33,706 --> 00:09:35,207 That's a. Long time. 199 00:09:35,207 --> 00:09:36,475 It was 20 years. 200 00:09:36,475 --> 00:09:42,014 I was telling that story to anyone who would listen to anyone in my circle. 201 00:09:42,181 --> 00:09:42,615 Right. 202 00:09:42,615 --> 00:09:45,451 You know, to the point where they would say, oh, how is that going? 203 00:09:45,451 --> 00:09:49,322 And I and I and they, they heard all these stories 204 00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:52,425 and everything, but I just got sick of it. 205 00:09:52,692 --> 00:09:54,226 But look at the miracle. 206 00:09:54,226 --> 00:09:57,029 Within 48. Hours, it was in 48. 207 00:09:57,029 --> 00:09:58,798 Wow. Yeah. 208 00:09:58,798 --> 00:10:01,334 I don't know what happened between us, 209 00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:04,804 but I'm sure it was my fault and really was. 210 00:10:04,804 --> 00:10:06,906 Can you forgive me? 211 00:10:06,906 --> 00:10:10,509 And now, if you were to tell me 212 00:10:10,743 --> 00:10:14,947 any part of that story, I am like Teflon. 213 00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:18,084 It doesn't even make sense to me. 214 00:10:18,084 --> 00:10:23,055 I just have complete love for that person. 215 00:10:23,756 --> 00:10:26,792 And other people will speak ill of this person at times. 216 00:10:26,792 --> 00:10:29,028 And, I'm quiet. 217 00:10:29,028 --> 00:10:31,130 I don't say anything. 218 00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:34,233 And I just said, you know, the most I'll say is I don't feel that way. 219 00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:35,534 Yeah. You know, anymore. 220 00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:35,901 Yeah. 221 00:10:35,901 --> 00:10:38,704 And that's one thing I try not to get myself lured into. 222 00:10:38,704 --> 00:10:42,742 You know, to your point, there is, when I hear people speaking ill of people, 223 00:10:42,742 --> 00:10:45,211 I don't want to be drawn into the drama 224 00:10:45,211 --> 00:10:46,278 and the gossip, 225 00:10:46,278 --> 00:10:48,848 because if they're gossiping about that person is speaking 226 00:10:48,848 --> 00:10:52,284 ill of them, chances are they're speaking ill or gossiping about me. 227 00:10:53,252 --> 00:10:53,386 Yeah. 228 00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:56,822 How many times have you had people go up to you and say, just between you and me? 229 00:10:57,390 --> 00:11:00,059 And we know they said that to several other people, right? 230 00:11:00,059 --> 00:11:01,427 Right. Just between you and me. 231 00:11:01,427 --> 00:11:04,096 Although when I say it to you, I do mean it. 232 00:11:04,096 --> 00:11:06,165 I know what I love. What you say to me. 233 00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:08,634 You say you, me and Patty, right? 234 00:11:08,634 --> 00:11:10,369 And it's like, of course. 235 00:11:10,369 --> 00:11:12,505 Yeah. Because. Because my wife and I are one. Yes. 236 00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:13,706 And that's a good point. 237 00:11:13,706 --> 00:11:15,908 Because when people do say that to me, I say, listen, 238 00:11:15,908 --> 00:11:18,377 you know, my the only person I'll tell is my wife, right. 239 00:11:18,377 --> 00:11:20,780 You know, and oh well that's okay. They expect. That. 240 00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:22,715 Yes, yes. Yeah. 241 00:11:22,715 --> 00:11:27,486 But typically a lot of people, you know, the people that are prone to gossiping, 242 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:32,525 maybe I should phrase my I know answer that way, I know, I know and it just. 243 00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:33,192 But you're right. 244 00:11:33,192 --> 00:11:36,662 And you and you know because you've heard through the grapevine 245 00:11:36,829 --> 00:11:39,432 some things they've said just between you and me. 246 00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:41,901 And somebody else has repeated the same thing to you. 247 00:11:41,901 --> 00:11:42,735 I always tell people, 248 00:11:42,735 --> 00:11:46,439 if you say that to me, I guarantee you it will never get back to you. 249 00:11:46,572 --> 00:11:49,575 Yes, ever. You are so trust. Never. 250 00:11:49,608 --> 00:11:49,875 Know. 251 00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:52,478 You're you're like my priest in the confessional. 252 00:11:52,478 --> 00:11:54,013 You're really. Oh, father John. 253 00:11:55,081 --> 00:11:57,316 Bless me, father, for I have sinned. 254 00:11:57,316 --> 00:11:59,218 And they call me the Jim Hallmark. 255 00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:01,554 Johnny. 256 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:02,188 Hallmark. 257 00:12:02,188 --> 00:12:03,823 Johnny, I love that. 258 00:12:03,823 --> 00:12:04,790 Oh, thanks. 259 00:12:04,790 --> 00:12:07,193 No, you are a hallmark movie. 260 00:12:07,193 --> 00:12:08,961 Yes. In the back and the control room. 261 00:12:08,961 --> 00:12:10,596 You can edit that part out there. 262 00:12:10,596 --> 00:12:12,131 All right. Okay. Yeah. 263 00:12:12,131 --> 00:12:15,968 Right now, because a lot of people think, you know, what we talked about before. 264 00:12:15,968 --> 00:12:18,971 Is John really that way all the time? 265 00:12:18,971 --> 00:12:21,340 You know, you're very upbeat. 266 00:12:21,340 --> 00:12:22,775 I am I'm almost like anybody else. 267 00:12:22,775 --> 00:12:26,212 But you listen to people too, you know, that's a gift. 268 00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,881 That's a gift. And and you hear them. 269 00:12:28,881 --> 00:12:33,185 And I see the empathy in your eyes. 270 00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:36,589 And when you say you're going to pray for someone, like I said, 271 00:12:36,622 --> 00:12:39,325 you really pray for them and you hold them in your heart. 272 00:12:39,325 --> 00:12:41,327 And that really is a gift. 273 00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:44,230 And we can all do that when we were. 274 00:12:44,230 --> 00:12:45,931 We may not be born that way. 275 00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:48,901 I wasn't I think it was something 276 00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:52,905 that I had to learn and work on. 277 00:12:53,506 --> 00:12:56,509 And until it becomes a habit. 278 00:12:56,609 --> 00:13:00,146 So practice it daily, like wake up, 279 00:13:00,479 --> 00:13:05,050 you have the power, you have way more power than you realize. 280 00:13:05,317 --> 00:13:07,653 You have the power to turn off the news. 281 00:13:07,653 --> 00:13:09,789 You have the power to think better thoughts. 282 00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:13,893 Don't be drawn into the negative. 283 00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:19,131 There's there's little in life probably, that we have control over. 284 00:13:19,598 --> 00:13:23,369 But, you know, the old saying is you control your thoughts and control. 285 00:13:23,369 --> 00:13:25,104 You can choose your words. 286 00:13:25,104 --> 00:13:28,107 Oh, you can you can manifest your reality in so many ways 287 00:13:28,440 --> 00:13:31,243 just by the words you speak over yourself. 288 00:13:31,243 --> 00:13:32,378 Yeah, you speak 289 00:13:32,378 --> 00:13:35,414 and the way you wake up in the morning like we had talked about just moments ago. 290 00:13:35,881 --> 00:13:38,684 Just be intentional about your day. Right? 291 00:13:38,684 --> 00:13:40,286 You know, because there's just so much chaos. 292 00:13:40,286 --> 00:13:43,289 There's so many people that want to sabotage your day or, 293 00:13:43,289 --> 00:13:45,691 you know, vie for your time. And that's all good. 294 00:13:45,691 --> 00:13:49,862 But you've got to really protect yourself too and protect your time, protect you. 295 00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:50,629 You would you could pray 296 00:13:50,629 --> 00:13:53,999 for everybody and love everybody, but you also have to protect your time. 297 00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:55,734 Yeah. You do. 298 00:13:55,734 --> 00:14:01,073 And, you know, I would suggest to everyone to, you know, I wanted to say 299 00:14:01,073 --> 00:14:06,512 try for a day not to be judgmental, but how about you try for five minutes? 300 00:14:07,713 --> 00:14:10,015 Sometimes that could even seem. 301 00:14:10,015 --> 00:14:10,850 Like increments. 302 00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:12,451 Little increments. 303 00:14:12,451 --> 00:14:14,820 Be mindful of that every day. 304 00:14:14,820 --> 00:14:18,557 Because every time you judge or you hate, you send anger. 305 00:14:18,958 --> 00:14:21,227 You lose energy. 306 00:14:21,227 --> 00:14:22,695 And I will. 307 00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:24,230 I am very protective. 308 00:14:24,230 --> 00:14:27,032 I will not let that happen to myself. 309 00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:27,666 Smart too. 310 00:14:27,666 --> 00:14:30,669 Because the thing is, a lot of diseases, I believe, 311 00:14:30,836 --> 00:14:33,572 based on what I read, comes from the term. 312 00:14:33,572 --> 00:14:36,108 Well, disease really means lack of these. 313 00:14:36,108 --> 00:14:37,376 So when you have that lack of use, 314 00:14:37,376 --> 00:14:40,112 I really believe it manifests to in the body. 315 00:14:40,112 --> 00:14:40,379 Right. 316 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:44,783 And if we hate and we use all that, there's only so much energy 317 00:14:44,783 --> 00:14:47,786 we have in our body, only so much energy in our cup. 318 00:14:48,287 --> 00:14:50,856 So let's fill it up with positivity the most we can. 319 00:14:50,856 --> 00:14:51,624 Yes, let's face it. 320 00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:54,260 You know, we're not, none of us are perfect. 321 00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:56,395 We all judge by nature. 322 00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:57,997 Yeah, unfortunately, we do that. 323 00:14:57,997 --> 00:15:01,200 We see someone and we judge that within five 1015 20s. 324 00:15:01,934 --> 00:15:04,904 But we just need to kind of correct our thought a little bit 325 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:08,474 before we judge, you know, and look at ourselves. 326 00:15:09,475 --> 00:15:11,377 We're far from perfect right. 327 00:15:11,377 --> 00:15:14,380 We have a lot of flaws. Yeah. 328 00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:16,882 And I don't, I have a lot. 329 00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:20,719 As long as we're alive we're gonna have a lot of a lot of flaws. 330 00:15:21,420 --> 00:15:24,857 But if you find yourself getting, getting tense and, you know, 331 00:15:24,857 --> 00:15:28,894 because I work with people with phobias and anxiety and everything, just 332 00:15:30,262 --> 00:15:33,232 as simple as reminding yourself to breathe. 333 00:15:33,232 --> 00:15:36,869 So even right now, whether you're driving and listening, 334 00:15:36,869 --> 00:15:38,570 don't close your eyes for it. 335 00:15:38,570 --> 00:15:42,308 But, relax your shoulders because so many times 336 00:15:42,308 --> 00:15:45,311 we have our shoulders up to our ears and we don't realize it. 337 00:15:45,644 --> 00:15:48,647 But relax your shoulders and take in a belly breath 338 00:15:49,081 --> 00:15:53,252 because here's what happens when you breathe what they call thoracic 339 00:15:53,252 --> 00:15:59,091 lee up here, you're sending a message to your brain that you're in trouble, 340 00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:03,262 so your brain doesn't know the difference between, 341 00:16:03,662 --> 00:16:06,632 you know, that old fight or flight caveman days. 342 00:16:07,099 --> 00:16:10,135 There was a time where we human race 343 00:16:10,569 --> 00:16:13,172 was running from danger. 344 00:16:13,172 --> 00:16:16,308 I'm a real danger, and we needed that extra 345 00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:20,012 adrenaline flowing through so we could running get away. 346 00:16:20,045 --> 00:16:21,313 Have is in my house every now and then. 347 00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:23,148 When I took off, my wife. 348 00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:24,917 She's got the curling. Iron. 349 00:16:24,917 --> 00:16:26,719 I run like you know what? 350 00:16:28,354 --> 00:16:29,822 And that's when you need the adrenaline. 351 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:32,558 Exactly. Yeah, exactly. Yes. 352 00:16:32,558 --> 00:16:36,895 But the moment you get your breath down into your belly 353 00:16:37,663 --> 00:16:41,333 and think about, a dog 354 00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:44,336 or a cat when they're sleeping or a toddler, 355 00:16:44,803 --> 00:16:48,807 their bellies are going up and down and the only time 356 00:16:48,807 --> 00:16:52,978 they're breathing from up here is when a baby's crying. 357 00:16:52,978 --> 00:16:56,682 A dog is barking, a cat's meowing because they're upset. 358 00:16:57,282 --> 00:17:01,420 So we're suppose to be breathing normally through, 359 00:17:01,553 --> 00:17:04,556 you know, our, our abdominal area, 360 00:17:05,424 --> 00:17:07,326 there are diaphragm. 361 00:17:07,326 --> 00:17:09,661 And when you do that, you send a message 362 00:17:09,661 --> 00:17:12,631 to your brain that you're okay 363 00:17:12,898 --> 00:17:16,035 and you couldn't have stressful thoughts 364 00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:19,171 or an anxiety panic attack 365 00:17:19,471 --> 00:17:22,741 because your brain shuts off the valves 366 00:17:23,275 --> 00:17:28,680 to the adrenaline and to the cortisol, you know, all of that. 367 00:17:29,348 --> 00:17:31,650 And then you just begin to feel relaxed. 368 00:17:31,650 --> 00:17:33,452 Now you hone in on the dopamine. 369 00:17:33,452 --> 00:17:34,053 There you go. 370 00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,120 Good feeling chemicals. 371 00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:36,321 Yes, yes. 372 00:17:36,321 --> 00:17:39,391 Because because actually we're not getting up and running. 373 00:17:39,391 --> 00:17:41,293 So let's say you're sitting at your desk 374 00:17:41,293 --> 00:17:44,396 and you're very stressed about work, and your brain starts 375 00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:47,599 sending out like this adrenaline and you start to feel okay. 376 00:17:47,599 --> 00:17:49,068 You stop the clock, but. 377 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:50,402 No, your heart starts racing. 378 00:17:50,402 --> 00:17:55,340 Your palms get sweaty because your brain is saying, do something. 379 00:17:55,707 --> 00:17:56,809 You're not doing anything. 380 00:17:56,809 --> 00:17:59,611 You're not running because we're not running for danger. 381 00:17:59,611 --> 00:18:02,281 Hopefully we're not running from danger all the time. 382 00:18:02,281 --> 00:18:05,651 So the only way to counteract that is to say, 383 00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:09,555 I'm going to take a deep breath and I'll show you a really trick, quick 384 00:18:10,255 --> 00:18:12,591 trick with. And trigger quick trick. 385 00:18:12,591 --> 00:18:14,993 That's right. Quick quick quick quick. 386 00:18:14,993 --> 00:18:15,527 Whatever. 387 00:18:18,197 --> 00:18:19,565 This is organic, folks. 388 00:18:19,565 --> 00:18:21,066 This is organic. Nothing. 389 00:18:21,066 --> 00:18:24,136 You know slick about this, right? Nothing. 390 00:18:24,236 --> 00:18:25,604 And while you're talking about that, 391 00:18:25,604 --> 00:18:28,240 I heard a ding on my phone, so I'm not sure if I, 392 00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:30,976 But while you're doing that, I'm just going to show you. 393 00:18:30,976 --> 00:18:31,410 There we go. 394 00:18:31,410 --> 00:18:34,413 If you close off one nostril. 395 00:18:34,413 --> 00:18:37,983 I do this in the car and I'll just, like, lean like this. 396 00:18:37,983 --> 00:18:41,954 So, you know, it doesn't look like you're picking your nose or anything but, 397 00:18:42,287 --> 00:18:45,290 but if you just close off one nostril 398 00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:48,026 and you take a breath in through 399 00:18:48,026 --> 00:18:51,063 that nostril, out that nostril, 400 00:18:51,830 --> 00:18:55,033 it automatically makes you diaphragmatic breathe. 401 00:18:55,300 --> 00:18:57,936 It just automatically does that. 402 00:18:57,936 --> 00:19:00,839 So and you can alternate three times 403 00:19:00,839 --> 00:19:04,143 on each side and you're just going to feel better. 404 00:19:04,343 --> 00:19:07,513 I guarantee you you're going to feel better. 405 00:19:08,013 --> 00:19:09,214 So just a little trick that. 406 00:19:09,214 --> 00:19:10,983 I do that in the morning to the breathing exercises 407 00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:14,119 after reading your book with that too, I don't necessarily always, you know. 408 00:19:14,219 --> 00:19:16,622 You don't have to do that, but I. Just love taking it to. 409 00:19:18,690 --> 00:19:21,727 Yes. And just breathe it. 410 00:19:21,727 --> 00:19:22,227 Right. 411 00:19:22,227 --> 00:19:25,430 And anytime I feel stressed or a little bit I do that and I'll do it 412 00:19:25,430 --> 00:19:26,498 5 to 10 times. 413 00:19:26,498 --> 00:19:29,668 And all of a sudden like you said I feel so much better. 414 00:19:29,868 --> 00:19:32,571 You know I read a book years ago, that's where I got this from, 415 00:19:32,571 --> 00:19:34,673 like the Art of breathing. 416 00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:38,777 And I was fascinated by this, that we are meant 417 00:19:38,777 --> 00:19:42,447 to be breathing in through our nostrils and out through nostrils. 418 00:19:42,447 --> 00:19:44,283 And that's why we have nose hairs, 419 00:19:44,283 --> 00:19:47,486 because it captures the pollen and the dust and all of that. 420 00:19:47,686 --> 00:19:49,421 There's a purpose for that. 421 00:19:49,421 --> 00:19:52,591 In fact, the only time we should be breathing like 422 00:19:52,591 --> 00:19:54,960 this is when we're speaking. 423 00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:59,164 And even when we're eating, we should be silent. 424 00:19:59,464 --> 00:20:03,869 And I know in many other countries it's very sacred when they're eating. 425 00:20:04,303 --> 00:20:07,406 And a lot of times what happens in restaurants, people choke. 426 00:20:07,606 --> 00:20:08,807 Why are they choking? 427 00:20:08,807 --> 00:20:11,810 They have a mouthful of food and they're laughing and talking 428 00:20:11,810 --> 00:20:13,445 and it gets sucked in. 429 00:20:13,445 --> 00:20:15,647 So I'm also very mindful of that. 430 00:20:15,647 --> 00:20:19,551 I like to be really quiet when I'm eating and, 431 00:20:20,419 --> 00:20:24,223 and be mindful even before you put that first fork 432 00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:27,226 in your mouth to say thank you. 433 00:20:27,292 --> 00:20:29,094 Thank you for the food on my table. 434 00:20:29,094 --> 00:20:32,931 Thank you to all the people it took to bring you this food. 435 00:20:33,632 --> 00:20:36,001 And it just slows things 436 00:20:36,001 --> 00:20:39,004 down and makes you feel good. 437 00:20:39,004 --> 00:20:43,208 So wake up to that fact within yourself and you're going to feel a lot 438 00:20:43,208 --> 00:20:44,309 better in life. 439 00:20:44,309 --> 00:20:47,079 It's hard to be negative when you're grateful when you see. 440 00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:49,214 And that's a real good point about the food when you're sitting down. 441 00:20:49,214 --> 00:20:51,450 Patti and I will do our prayers, you know, before we eat at night, 442 00:20:51,450 --> 00:20:53,719 thanking, you know, thanking God for the food. 443 00:20:53,719 --> 00:20:56,622 But we also thank, you know, the Amazon driver comes up. 444 00:20:56,622 --> 00:20:58,590 The driver. Yes, we thank him. 445 00:20:58,590 --> 00:21:03,528 We yes, we pray for the gentleman, as you know, emptying our garbage cans. 446 00:21:03,528 --> 00:21:05,430 Yes. Thank you for all the mailman. 447 00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:06,632 Rice. Everywhere you go. 448 00:21:06,632 --> 00:21:09,167 Thank you so much for the cashier. Thank you so much for that. 449 00:21:09,167 --> 00:21:11,970 Waiter waitress, thank you so much for the chef in the back. 450 00:21:11,970 --> 00:21:14,940 You know, cooking our food restaurant when you when you're in a 451 00:21:15,641 --> 00:21:20,012 a state of gratitude, it really kind of brings you back into the center. 452 00:21:20,712 --> 00:21:21,280 It does. 453 00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:23,181 It automatically puts you in a good mood again. 454 00:21:23,181 --> 00:21:24,883 Again, it's not easy. 455 00:21:24,883 --> 00:21:26,485 But we have to be intentional. 456 00:21:26,485 --> 00:21:28,954 You have to be intentional. Intentional. 457 00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:31,123 Right? Right. 458 00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:35,127 And it's like, I always think of gratitude 459 00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:39,631 like a bucket of ice water, you know, throwing on a fire. 460 00:21:40,065 --> 00:21:41,800 It just puts it out. 461 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:46,004 Whatever you're upset about when you stop, right, to be grateful, 462 00:21:46,505 --> 00:21:49,274 it just comes everything. 463 00:21:49,274 --> 00:21:51,176 In the bucket of ice on the fire. 464 00:21:51,176 --> 00:21:53,011 Then throwing it on you. Yes. 465 00:21:53,011 --> 00:21:55,747 I wouldn't be so grateful if that was thrown off. No, I wouldn't want that up. 466 00:21:55,747 --> 00:21:58,383 But I wouldn't want to sit in the fire right there. 467 00:21:58,383 --> 00:21:59,351 Even though people do say. 468 00:21:59,351 --> 00:22:03,088 Cold plunges are really good for you mean for the immune system? Yes. 469 00:22:03,722 --> 00:22:05,857 Yes, but that's a whole other episode. 470 00:22:05,857 --> 00:22:09,861 Yes. We have to have my friend Kazeem on our show 471 00:22:09,861 --> 00:22:15,734 because he does that every week and chops the ice and goes, yes, yes. 472 00:22:15,734 --> 00:22:20,605 And he's he's quite the healthy mental and body wise. Yes. 473 00:22:20,605 --> 00:22:22,708 And he wrote a book. We should get him on here. 474 00:22:22,708 --> 00:22:25,010 Am I should we should. He wrote a children's book. 475 00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:28,447 But this children's book really is for adults as well, right? 476 00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:29,981 Yeah. 477 00:22:29,981 --> 00:22:31,083 So when. 478 00:22:31,083 --> 00:22:33,385 So are we going to wake up to, 479 00:22:34,753 --> 00:22:37,789 to gratitude every day and don't tell the same story? 480 00:22:37,789 --> 00:22:41,860 I think that's the basis of the show, is what story 481 00:22:41,860 --> 00:22:46,198 are you telling that maybe you're identified with? 482 00:22:46,465 --> 00:22:50,102 Oh, it did just remind me of Caroline Mace, Carolyn 483 00:22:50,102 --> 00:22:54,272 Mace, and a lot of people pronounce it mis, but she pronounces her. 484 00:22:54,539 --> 00:22:56,274 Her last name is mace. 485 00:22:56,274 --> 00:22:58,744 Oh, yeah, but it's m y s s. 486 00:22:58,744 --> 00:23:01,246 And 30 years ago I read. 487 00:23:01,246 --> 00:23:04,716 30 years ago I read a book of hers 488 00:23:05,217 --> 00:23:09,121 and she said, and she's a great she's a great intuitive. 489 00:23:09,821 --> 00:23:13,925 I don't know exactly what her title is, but she's certainly an author as speaker. 490 00:23:14,659 --> 00:23:17,662 And she's, she's pretty tough with people. 491 00:23:18,330 --> 00:23:21,066 And she said she was in a restaurant, and, 492 00:23:21,066 --> 00:23:24,536 she saw some people she knew at the table, and they introduced her around. 493 00:23:24,970 --> 00:23:29,408 And the woman said to her, hi, my name is, you know, whatever my my name is, 494 00:23:29,408 --> 00:23:34,479 you know, Sarah, and, I'm recovering from cancer and blah, blah, blah. 495 00:23:35,046 --> 00:23:39,751 And Carolyn said to her, why did you feel it was necessary 496 00:23:39,751 --> 00:23:44,723 to introduce yourself as a cancer patient or in recovery? 497 00:23:45,190 --> 00:23:49,394 And she said, because I am, she says, no, you are more than that. 498 00:23:50,162 --> 00:23:53,432 You know, like, why don't you drop that story? 499 00:23:53,598 --> 00:23:54,933 That's not your identity. 500 00:23:54,933 --> 00:23:57,803 You're you're battling cancer right now, but that's not who you are. 501 00:23:57,803 --> 00:23:58,570 Right? 502 00:23:58,570 --> 00:24:01,573 So I think that would be our suggestion to people. 503 00:24:01,740 --> 00:24:06,211 I think what follows the words I am is really important. 504 00:24:06,211 --> 00:24:07,879 Stream, Lee. Important. 505 00:24:07,879 --> 00:24:08,213 You know. 506 00:24:08,213 --> 00:24:08,613 Yeah. 507 00:24:08,613 --> 00:24:11,783 That, I am a big talker, not a victim. 508 00:24:12,017 --> 00:24:12,451 Right. 509 00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:14,953 Say that to yourself each time when you wake up in the morning. 510 00:24:14,953 --> 00:24:16,655 I'm a victor, not a victim. 511 00:24:16,655 --> 00:24:19,591 And so many times we focus on negative when we say things. 512 00:24:19,591 --> 00:24:20,592 Oh, I can't do that. 513 00:24:20,592 --> 00:24:22,494 I can't do this. I can't do that. 514 00:24:22,494 --> 00:24:25,330 Well, how can you, take the, 515 00:24:25,330 --> 00:24:28,500 the t out of can't and the apology and make it a can. 516 00:24:28,900 --> 00:24:33,472 What we say over ourselves really means so much, right? 517 00:24:33,538 --> 00:24:36,174 We have enough of the world out there being against us. 518 00:24:36,174 --> 00:24:38,477 We need to be for ourselves. 519 00:24:38,477 --> 00:24:41,246 Yes, and have fun with that. Yeah. 520 00:24:41,246 --> 00:24:44,749 You know, if someone comes over to you and says, hi, you know, size to me 521 00:24:44,783 --> 00:24:46,418 who, like, who are you? 522 00:24:46,418 --> 00:24:49,621 Just say, I am grateful to meet you, right? 523 00:24:49,788 --> 00:24:52,324 Yeah, that's who I am. Sure. 524 00:24:52,324 --> 00:24:54,593 And I always say all the time, you know, when people reach out to me 525 00:24:54,593 --> 00:24:57,596 on Facebook or Instagram and and friend me up, 526 00:24:57,796 --> 00:25:00,699 I'll say, you know, thank you so much for the reach out. 527 00:25:00,699 --> 00:25:01,433 I'm very grateful. 528 00:25:01,433 --> 00:25:04,503 And like my wife and I always say you can always gain a new friend. 529 00:25:05,470 --> 00:25:06,771 And people love that. 530 00:25:06,771 --> 00:25:08,039 It's just a warmness about it. 531 00:25:08,039 --> 00:25:08,640 But that's true. 532 00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:11,643 And we could all gain a new friend. Right. 533 00:25:11,843 --> 00:25:13,945 And we want to gain you as our friends. 534 00:25:13,945 --> 00:25:15,647 So will you. Please be our friend. 535 00:25:15,647 --> 00:25:16,081 Yeah. 536 00:25:16,081 --> 00:25:19,417 Like, you know if you like listening to us, like us, subscribe 537 00:25:19,417 --> 00:25:22,420 and tell people about us because we want to spread, 538 00:25:24,055 --> 00:25:27,259 the joy, of course, but we want to spread peace 539 00:25:28,226 --> 00:25:31,429 within you, because then that spreads to other people. 540 00:25:31,863 --> 00:25:34,366 And we need this now more than ever. 541 00:25:34,366 --> 00:25:37,002 The world is always going to need it, right? 542 00:25:37,002 --> 00:25:40,772 I look up biographies way back that took place in the 30s or 40s. 543 00:25:41,306 --> 00:25:43,074 There's always strife going on. 544 00:25:43,074 --> 00:25:45,343 Every every time's be tumultuous. No way it has. 545 00:25:45,343 --> 00:25:50,549 But during the most tumultuous times, I think the good rises up also. 546 00:25:50,549 --> 00:25:52,150 So be part of that campaign. 547 00:25:52,150 --> 00:25:54,386 I say. The cream always rises to the top that. 548 00:25:54,386 --> 00:25:56,588 Well, you know, yes it does. It really does. 549 00:25:56,588 --> 00:26:01,059 But you could find us on YouTube and iHeart and I believe. 550 00:26:01,259 --> 00:26:01,826 Whatever. 551 00:26:01,826 --> 00:26:05,630 Spotify, Apple, just Google just what they tell a friend about us. 552 00:26:05,630 --> 00:26:06,598 Please. 553 00:26:06,598 --> 00:26:09,034 Yes, I really appreciate that. Thank you for listening. 554 00:26:09,034 --> 00:26:11,636 Thank you so much for checking out what's good with John and Joyce. 555 00:26:11,636 --> 00:26:14,639 And, a lot of love for you and your family. 556 00:26:14,673 --> 00:26:15,774 Bye for now. Bye.