1 01:00:00,500 --> 01:00:03,166 Good morning and welcome 2 01:00:03,166 --> 01:00:04,708 to your morning cereal. 3 01:00:08,958 --> 01:00:11,083 Okay, good morning and welcome to Monday. 4 01:00:11,500 --> 01:00:13,208 I hope you had a great weekend 5 01:00:13,333 --> 01:00:14,916 and if you were one of 6 01:00:14,916 --> 01:00:16,791 just a few tens of millions 7 01:00:16,791 --> 01:00:17,583 and millions of people 8 01:00:17,583 --> 01:00:18,833 that watched the Super Bowl, 9 01:00:19,041 --> 01:00:21,416 well, I hope you at least enjoy the food 10 01:00:21,416 --> 01:00:22,500 and the commercials, right? 11 01:00:22,916 --> 01:00:24,750 But if your Monday still 12 01:00:24,750 --> 01:00:26,250 needs a little bit of sweetness 13 01:00:26,250 --> 01:00:28,583 to get you moving, you are in luck. 14 01:00:28,958 --> 01:00:31,291 Today is National Chocolate Day. 15 01:00:31,666 --> 01:00:33,250 So maybe start the day in the week 16 01:00:33,250 --> 01:00:34,500 with most likely a 17 01:00:34,500 --> 01:00:36,666 zero calorie mocha latte. 18 01:00:36,875 --> 01:00:37,416 It's pretty good. 19 01:00:38,125 --> 01:00:39,291 It is time for 20 01:00:39,291 --> 01:00:42,000 Friday's trivia answer, teas. 21 01:00:42,541 --> 01:00:44,083 Assam, dejeerling and 22 01:00:44,083 --> 01:00:46,708 roebas are all types of teas. 23 01:00:47,166 --> 01:00:48,166 And now the essential 24 01:00:48,166 --> 01:00:49,958 vitamins in your morning cereal. 25 01:00:49,958 --> 01:00:51,125 Today's quote is from 26 01:00:51,125 --> 01:00:53,583 birthday girl Rose Leslie, 27 01:00:53,583 --> 01:00:55,375 who is turning 38 years old today. 28 01:00:55,791 --> 01:00:58,708 Rose said, quote, "You have to be brave 29 01:00:58,875 --> 01:01:00,416 "and take risks," end quote. 30 01:01:00,833 --> 01:01:02,500 And this is a solid reminder 31 01:01:02,666 --> 01:01:05,125 that comfort zones are safe and cozy, 32 01:01:05,541 --> 01:01:06,791 but you need to face 33 01:01:06,791 --> 01:01:08,208 your fears to push yourself 34 01:01:08,666 --> 01:01:10,041 and pursue your goals, right? 35 01:01:10,333 --> 01:01:12,041 Embrace those uncertainties 36 01:01:12,500 --> 01:01:14,791 if you want to chase down personal and 37 01:01:14,791 --> 01:01:15,916 professional growth. 38 01:01:16,250 --> 01:01:18,833 And remember, some of your best learning 39 01:01:19,125 --> 01:01:19,958 comes out of failure. 40 01:01:20,291 --> 01:01:21,958 And you also might remember, 41 01:01:21,958 --> 01:01:24,000 this is something Rose said also in a 42 01:01:24,000 --> 01:01:25,166 role that she played, 43 01:01:25,708 --> 01:01:27,333 and you know nothing, Jon Snow. 44 01:01:28,000 --> 01:01:29,083 All right, well, let's 45 01:01:29,083 --> 01:01:30,291 hear from the experts now. 46 01:01:30,291 --> 01:01:32,000 It is time to pour in some Let Them 47 01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:33,208 Theory by Mel Robbins. 48 01:01:33,750 --> 01:01:35,500 And today's section is titled, 49 01:01:35,916 --> 01:01:37,541 The Purpose of Dating is Not 50 01:01:37,541 --> 01:01:39,666 Just to Find the One, okay? 51 01:01:40,166 --> 01:01:42,666 And right away, Mel flips one of the 52 01:01:42,666 --> 01:01:43,833 biggest cultural myths 53 01:01:44,083 --> 01:01:44,750 on its head. 54 01:01:45,166 --> 01:01:46,208 She explains that most 55 01:01:46,208 --> 01:01:47,333 people approach dating 56 01:01:47,333 --> 01:01:48,625 like a scavenger hunt. 57 01:01:49,291 --> 01:01:51,708 Find the one, then lock it down 58 01:01:51,708 --> 01:01:53,583 and declare the mission complete. 59 01:01:54,583 --> 01:01:56,458 But Mel argues that that 60 01:01:56,458 --> 01:01:58,250 mindset, it creates pressure, 61 01:01:58,791 --> 01:02:00,125 it's anxiety for you, 62 01:02:00,125 --> 01:02:01,416 and a whole lot of bad 63 01:02:01,416 --> 01:02:02,625 decisions along the way. 64 01:02:03,041 --> 01:02:04,458 So as Mel writes, quote, 65 01:02:04,666 --> 01:02:06,625 "Dating is not about proving your worth 66 01:02:06,625 --> 01:02:08,916 or rushing towards permanence, 67 01:02:09,166 --> 01:02:10,875 it's about learning," end quote. 68 01:02:11,375 --> 01:02:12,458 And according to Mel, 69 01:02:12,458 --> 01:02:13,625 the real purpose of dating 70 01:02:13,625 --> 01:02:15,416 is data collection, okay? 71 01:02:15,916 --> 01:02:17,958 Every interaction teaches you something 72 01:02:17,958 --> 01:02:19,083 about communication, 73 01:02:19,083 --> 01:02:21,458 about boundaries, emotional availability, 74 01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:24,666 and most importantly here, yourself. 75 01:02:25,375 --> 01:02:27,750 So when you stop treating every day 76 01:02:27,750 --> 01:02:30,041 like a potential forever decision, 77 01:02:30,291 --> 01:02:31,416 you actually start 78 01:02:31,416 --> 01:02:32,958 showing up more authentically. 79 01:02:33,416 --> 01:02:34,541 And she points out how 80 01:02:34,541 --> 01:02:36,791 many people ignore red flags 81 01:02:36,875 --> 01:02:37,375 because they're just 82 01:02:37,375 --> 01:02:39,041 so focused on potential 83 01:02:39,500 --> 01:02:41,208 instead of what's reality, 84 01:02:41,208 --> 01:02:42,083 what's right in front of them. 85 01:02:42,458 --> 01:02:43,375 One of the most powerful 86 01:02:43,375 --> 01:02:44,958 lines in this section is, quote, 87 01:02:45,375 --> 01:02:47,208 "You don't date to be chosen, 88 01:02:47,666 --> 01:02:49,458 you date to observe," end quote. 89 01:02:49,875 --> 01:02:51,625 And that shift alone takes dating 90 01:02:51,625 --> 01:02:54,666 from exhausting to empowering, okay? 91 01:02:55,333 --> 01:02:56,750 Now, Mel also emphasizes 92 01:02:56,750 --> 01:02:58,500 that dating helps you practice 93 01:02:58,708 --> 01:03:01,208 the let them mindset in real time. 94 01:03:01,666 --> 01:03:03,208 If someone doesn't text you back 95 01:03:03,208 --> 01:03:04,625 or they cancel last minute, 96 01:03:04,916 --> 01:03:05,791 or maybe they're showing 97 01:03:05,791 --> 01:03:07,666 just mixed signals, let them. 98 01:03:08,166 --> 01:03:10,291 Their behavior is information for you, 99 01:03:10,291 --> 01:03:12,375 it's not a challenge for you to solve. 100 01:03:12,958 --> 01:03:13,875 And Mel explains that 101 01:03:13,875 --> 01:03:15,375 every date is an opportunity 102 01:03:15,666 --> 01:03:17,166 to clarify what you want, 103 01:03:17,708 --> 01:03:19,583 what you won't tolerate, 104 01:03:19,583 --> 01:03:20,708 and how you want to 105 01:03:20,708 --> 01:03:21,625 feel in a relationship. 106 01:03:22,125 --> 01:03:22,958 The goal isn't to 107 01:03:22,958 --> 01:03:24,750 impress, it's to assess. 108 01:03:25,500 --> 01:03:26,500 And the moment you 109 01:03:26,500 --> 01:03:27,833 stop chasing validation, 110 01:03:28,083 --> 01:03:29,500 dating becomes lighter, healthier, 111 01:03:29,916 --> 01:03:31,375 and honestly, it 112 01:03:31,375 --> 01:03:32,625 becomes more fun for you. 113 01:03:33,208 --> 01:03:34,500 So Mel reminds readers 114 01:03:34,500 --> 01:03:36,291 that dating is part of growth, 115 01:03:36,375 --> 01:03:37,833 not a detour from it. 116 01:03:38,083 --> 01:03:40,166 Each experience sharpens your self-trust 117 01:03:40,166 --> 01:03:41,875 and strengthens your boundaries. 118 01:03:42,333 --> 01:03:43,625 And as she says, quote, 119 01:03:43,916 --> 01:03:45,625 "Every interaction that doesn't work 120 01:03:45,625 --> 01:03:47,208 is still working for you. 121 01:03:47,458 --> 01:03:51,333 All right, here is your Monday takeaway. 122 01:03:52,125 --> 01:03:54,500 Dating isn't about finding the one fast, 123 01:03:54,916 --> 01:03:56,333 it's about becoming someone 124 01:03:56,333 --> 01:03:58,583 who knows exactly what they want. 125 01:03:59,375 --> 01:04:00,500 All right, chocolate 126 01:04:00,500 --> 01:04:02,291 has been consumed, I hope. 127 01:04:02,916 --> 01:04:04,000 Wisdom has now been delivered 128 01:04:04,416 --> 01:04:05,500 and it is time to 129 01:04:05,500 --> 01:04:07,250 take this Monday head on. 130 01:04:07,500 --> 01:04:08,875 But first, the prize from 131 01:04:08,875 --> 01:04:10,125 the bottom of the cereal box, 132 01:04:10,125 --> 01:04:11,250 the morning cereal 133 01:04:11,250 --> 01:04:12,833 trivia question of the day. 134 01:04:12,833 --> 01:04:13,375 Here it is. 135 01:04:14,083 --> 01:04:16,916 What type of bean is typically used 136 01:04:17,166 --> 01:04:18,375 to make hummus? 137 01:04:19,000 --> 01:04:21,000 All right, well, thanks for listening 138 01:04:21,000 --> 01:04:22,041 to morning cereal today. 139 01:04:22,333 --> 01:04:23,833 We will see you back here tomorrow 140 01:04:23,833 --> 01:04:25,291 for the trivia answer and 141 01:04:25,291 --> 01:04:26,750 more sugar for the soul. 142 01:04:27,208 --> 01:04:30,125 And until then, have a fantastic day. 143 01:04:31,458 --> 01:04:33,041 Don't forget to follow and subscribe 144 01:04:33,041 --> 01:04:34,583 to the morning cereal podcast 145 01:04:34,791 --> 01:04:36,541 on the One Life Live It channel. 146 01:04:37,041 --> 01:04:38,750 You can find more episodes and videos 147 01:04:38,750 --> 01:04:40,208 by visiting our YouTube channel 148 01:04:40,375 --> 01:04:41,500 and the website at 149 01:04:41,500 --> 01:04:44,208 Shawningless and at shawningless.com, 150 01:04:44,458 --> 01:04:45,166 where you can also 151 01:04:45,166 --> 01:04:46,500 follow our other podcast, 152 01:04:46,875 --> 01:04:48,083 the Mr. and Mrs. English podcast 153 01:04:48,666 --> 01:04:49,833 and the Life Happens podcast. 154 01:04:50,666 --> 01:04:52,791 And these other podcasts will dive deeper 155 01:04:52,791 --> 01:04:54,625 into everyday issues, self-improvement 156 01:04:54,625 --> 01:04:56,333 and well-being, business and finance. 157 01:04:56,916 --> 01:04:58,500 And we welcome special guests too. 158 01:04:59,000 --> 01:05:00,041 So join us, it'll be a 159 01:05:00,041 --> 01:05:01,083 good time, I promise. 160 01:05:01,791 --> 01:05:02,875 Thanks again for listening. 161 01:05:02,875 --> 01:05:04,458 Have a fantastic day and 162 01:05:04,458 --> 01:05:04,958 we'll see you tomorrow.