Parenting in the Trenches with Karen Peters

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What a massive pivot point in a couple's relationship when there's a baby on the way! What we tend to invest most in, is getting our physical spaces ready in time for baby's arrival, adjusting our financial planning to include a new family member, and read all the parenting books we can get our hands on. All of that is an important part of the journey, but what new parents don't yet know, is the impact it will have on the couples relationship you're familiar with. There is no better time to use the wisdom of couples who have been there to know what reinforcements your relationship might need to weather one of the most challenging phases of life and love.

Show Notes

Letter from the trenches
Dear Couples,
The quest for strong, healthy and meaningful couples relationships continues today with our 3rd episode of this mini series, where we look at how best to prepare and solidify your couples relationship when your new baby is about to, or has recently arrived on the scene! When you announce to family and friends the exciting news that you’re expecting, you’re likely to hear things like, “I have so many hand me downs you can have!” or, “that’s so fun! Make sure you invest in the best stroller - you won’t regret it”, or “that’s incredible! I can’t wait to host your baby shower”, or “what colors will you use in the nursery?!”. I have yet to hear anyone say, “it’s such an exciting time when 2 becomes 3 - and it’s also super challenging because everything changes and it’s all new territory. Have you talked with one another about how your relationship with one another will be shaped and stay strong when the sleep has vanished, the house-based roles shift and the finances need a review?” I get it. It’s not the most hyped up and sparkly reaction one can have when you share this glorious news. But while it’s not the popular thing to say, it’s certainly packed with wisdom and it doesn’t have to kill the joy of the moment. It’s about owning the process and being intentional so you don’t have to struggle as hard when the Real of parenting a newborn who changes EVERYTHING, hits. It’s building scaffolding for your love relationship when it’s under renovation. The results can mean having a stronger structure, and even improved decor! Couples who prepare well for this journey do better and today I want to share with you some evidence-based tips that will help you weather the reality of bringing your baby home.

As a therapist who supports new parents, I wanted to make sure that I had the best knowledge and skills out there to boost and strengthen couples relationships when they are at one of their most significant reconstruction points, so I was trained through the Gottman Institute and became a certified Bringing Baby Home educator. If you listened to the last 2 episodes in this series, you heard about some of the ideas and strategies for strengthening your relationship from the renowned Gottman method. Today I plan to share some of that with you. As the evidence shows, couples who have these conversations before their little one is born or shortly after, do better down the road. Sounds worth investing in, right? Just like the ideal stroller, you won’t regret it!

If you want to learn more about my own uniquely designed online courses for expecting or newly parenting couples, you can find the details here:
When You & Me Become Three and
Adoption: What to do while you wait

To receive your free printable "Turning Towards" guide, subscribe to my podcast here, and it'll show up in your inbox.
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Been there and with you,

What is Parenting in the Trenches with Karen Peters?

Hey weary parent. Parenting is a tough gig, but we've got your back. Join child and family therapist, and mom-in-the-trenches, Karen Peters and learn about skills to support you in supporting your kids, while laughing and getting real about the crazy sticky messiness of life with kiddo's.