Speaker 1: K. We are into the second half of our sex and money in the story of Ruth series. And we have spent the first two weeks looking at the first two chapters of the book of Ruth where the focus has really been on the economics of kingdom. Today, we begin to shift toward some of the romance in the story that we saw budding between Boaz and Ruth, and that will give us a chance to start to talk about sex. Which I know is really what everyone has been waiting for since we started this series.
There is nothing better than listening to your pastor talk about sex. Am I right? It's like those awful sex ed classes you had in high school, where for some reason they would always assign your gym coach to do it. The guy who wears sweatpants to work is probably not the person who should be assigned to this class, but that's alright. It's just a joke.
I know there are incredible gym teachers in the world. Don't send any angry emails. But I have taught this series now for a number of years. And so in some sense, all of my insecurities and perhaps unfortunately inhibitions around talking about sex have long since faded and so I apologize going into this. But we do have a lot to cover today, and I have made a commitment to end on time every Sunday.
And so I'm gonna dispense with the recap we normally do and jump right in. I trust that you can either go online to podcast or our YouTube channel, links are there at commons.church and you can catch up that way. So let's pray and then we're gonna jump right into chapter three tonight. God, as we continue to walk through this story of Ruth tonight, and as we shift our attention now to the topic of sexuality, an area that so frequently captivates, and yet also often sometimes takes our imagination off course with sideways lusts. Would you help us to feel, help us to want, and indeed even help us to desire what is good.
But at the same time, we would ask for your spirit and your grace to speak compassion and openness to our hearts as well. Both for those we encounter in our day and in our conversations, but also grace for ourselves. Because where we have missed the mark, or where we have made unhealthy decisions in the past around our relationships, would we learn to see and hear only your offer of healing grace in these conversations. And so where there is pain or regret, we ask you to bring healing and comfort. And where there is confusion or anxiety, bring clarity.
And where there has been hardness or bitterness that has crept in and defined our hearts, would you flood our conversation tonight with grace. May we speak openly and may we hear well in this conversation. In the strong name of the risen Christ we pray. Amen. Okay.
Before we jump into this chapter, a little background here to get us started. Because we haven't really addressed this yet in this series, but the truth is we don't know who wrote this book, Ruth. The Babylonian Talmud suggests that Samuel wrote it, but despite the connection that to David that comes at the end of the book, that doesn't seem likely given the time frames. This story of Ruth takes place several generations before Samuel, and so even if it was possible that he was the one who wrote it down eventually, there doesn't seem to be a lot to back that connection up. Another scholar has suggested that it was a daughter of David, namely Tamar who wrote the story Ruth.
That's quite a specific hypothesis, but it's an interesting one nonetheless. Especially given Tamar's horrible experience with men. She was unfortunately raped by her half brother. And so this idea is that perhaps she took the opportunity to write the genealogy of her father as an expression of what male and female relationships could or should have been in her life. Again, and it's a really interesting idea, but there's not much beyond conjecture to really back that up.
It does bring up a good question though. If this story is a parable about men and women, and it is in a sense. And if the names of the characters as we've seen in the first two weeks often foreshadow where the story is going to go, then should we imagine Ruth as an actual historical event? And the bottom line as far as I can see is yes with a caveat. From the way the story is written, it's very possible likely we are talking about real people who actually existed at some point in history.
That said, the story has also very clearly been stylized to make a point. Now think of it this way, why would anyone ever bother to just write down the random history of a widow and a foreigner? This story has been written and preserved and passed down to make a point about God. And so we need to understand the historical context in order to get it, but we also need to read it as literature. We need to see what the author is doing, and we need to search for what the author is trying to bring out of this story and communicate to us.
Those things are not at odds with each other. In fact, everything you read in the bible is there because the community of faith wanted to pass something theological onto you. It's not just history, it's history with a point. And that's what's happening here in Ruth. So with that in mind, let's open chapter three.
One day Ruth's mother-in-law Naomi said to her, my daughter, I must find a home for you where you will be well provided for. Now Boaz, with whose women you have worked, is a relative of ours. Tonight, he will be winnowing barley on the threshing floor. Wash, put on perfume and get dressed in your best clothes. Then go down to the threshing floor, but don't let him know you are there until he has finished eating and drinking.
When he lies down, note the place that he's lying, then go and uncover his feet and lie down. He will tell you what to do. Naomi, you dirty minks. Now it may not seem like it in English, but this is some pretty sexually charged stuff right here. So let's take a look at what's going on, and we'll watch how it all unfolds, and see what Boa's response here.
But first though, there is an interesting little bit even in this opening scene. Naomi says this, my daughter, I must find a home for you where you will be well provided for. Do you remember back in chapter one, after her husband and her sons have died, Naomi decides to head home to Israel and she tells her daughters in law to go to their hometowns in search of help. And what does she say to her daughters? She says, may the Lord show you kindness.
May the Lord grant that each of you find rest in the home of another husband. So here's the question. If Naomi's plan works here, and she finds a home for her daughter-in-law, Has Yahweh answered her prayers or has she? And this is an important theme in Ruth. It's the same point that we ended on last week because the answer is yes.
Just like in chapter two, where Boaz is indistinguishable from the loving kindness of God. Here, Naomi is inseparable from the very thing that she has asked God to do. One scholar puts it this way, a significant theological point emerges here. Here, human means carry out something previously understood to be in Yahweh's province. Naomi begins to answer her own prayer.
Thus, she models one way in which the divine and human actions work together. Believers are not to wait passively for events to happen. Rather, they must seize the initiative when a divine opportunity presents itself. This is Robert l Hubbard, insert Scientology joke here. Trust me, not Ron l Hubbard, that's a different guy.
But, perhaps we could say it this way. Naomi is Yahweh's instrument to answer Naomi's prayer. Is there something that you are waiting desperately for in your life? But perhaps you are waiting too passively. I mean, we are talking about sexuality here.
Are you waiting for a partner, for a relationship, for God to bring someone into your life, but you're not doing anything about it? Listen, I'm not saying Tinder is the answer. But engaging in community, asking someone straightforwardly on a date without any expectations, that's okay. And sometimes we actually have to pursue the things that we're asking God for. Now granted, there's a very big difference between pursuing something with God and completely leaving God out of the equation.
But if you tell me that you have some deep burning desire inside of you, and you tell me about all of the time that you have spent praying and pleading and asking God to help you, but you can't show me anything that you've done to head in that direction, then I'm going to ask how much you really want it. If you want that promotion at work, if you want your marriage to be stronger, if you want a better relationship with your kids, God wants that for you too, but you need to work at it as well. In my experience, oftentimes the people who consider themselves the most blessed by God are also the people who have worked the hardest to get to where they are. And that is not a contradiction. Maybe you are God's instrument to answer your prayers.
Alright. Let's get to the sexy stuff. Naomi says, tonight Boaz will be winnowing barley on the threshing floor. Wash, put on perfume, and get dressed in your best clothes. Now, this idea of winnowing barley, this is a big end of year harvest celebration for the community.
What happens is that barley and very likely wheat would have been brought into a small barn or flat piece of land. And basically, they would either beat it with tools or just stomp it with their feet to break the husks and release the good parts that we eat. And so what happens is you do this in a barn with doors on either side until a breeze comes in and it blows the husks away as they break up and the grain is left on the threshing floor. It's a fairly simple, but it's also a very time consuming process. But it's also a big celebration in the community because this is the celebration where all the hard work of the field is about to pay off in food for the coming year.
And so very likely, the reason that Naomi has waited for this is because there will be a big party afterward. In fact, she says as much in verse three. Go down to the threshing floor, but don't let him know you are there until he has finished eating and drinking. Basically, wait until he's good and full and hopefully maybe just a little bit drunk. Even this phrase, wash, put on perfume and get dressed in your best clothes.
Obviously, Naomi wants Ruth to look good here, be attractive and seductive. But, it looks like this phrase is actually even a reference to an ancient Semitic bridal ritual. The bride was said to rise on the day of her wedding, to wash perfume and dress for her groom. Now if that's the case, then Naomi may even be suggesting that this is a sort of wedding day for Ruth. She sees the night ending well, if you know what I mean.
And if we haven't got it yet, then she says, note the place where he's lying and go and uncover his feet and lie down. He will tell you what to do. Now, this is where the real innuendo comes in. Lie down is the word Shekov. It's repeated twice here.
It's a very common phrase in Hebrew referring to sex. And to uncover his feet, this also seems to be a euphemism. Because feet was slang in Hebrew for penis. Now, for reference here, here's a common example in the Hebrew scriptures. First Samuel twenty four three.
Saul came down to the sheep pens, a cave was there, he went in to relieve himself. The thing is in Hebrew what it actually says is he went in and he uncovered his feet. Now from the story it's quite obvious he didn't go into a cave to uncover his feet. He went in to use the bathroom. But this is just part of how they talked.
And it is no different than all of the strange and bizarre slang that we use for sexual organs today. Oddly, we are and we just have always been uncomfortable with this kind of stuff. I was actually listening to a podcast a few weeks ago on the etymology of slang in our language. And I happened across a few terms that were used in seventeenth century England, might find fascinating. Seventeenth century England, a woman's sexuality was known as the front parlor.
A man's known as the other thing. Clearly not very creative back then. But they definitely did not want to have to say vagina or penis in a polite conversation. Point is, for ancient Hebrew audiences reading this story, this is a hot and steamy affair. Everyone is giggling and uncomfortable just like you are right now because they know exactly what is being hinted at in the story.
But more than that, they know how scandalous this is. I mean it's one thing for Ruth, a foreign woman to act this way, but what about Boaz? I mean we know Boaz from the story. We know he's an upright honest Israelite. We know that his character and his generosity flow directly from his connection to Yahweh.
We've already seen him and his character in this story. How will he react to this plan? Well, verse five says, Ruth says, I will do whatever you say. So she went down to the threshing floor and did everything her mother-in-law told her to do. When Boaz had finished eating and drinking and he was in good spirits, literally what it says here is when his heart was full.
I like that. He went over to lie down at the far end of a grain pile. Ruth approached quietly, uncovering his feet and lay down. In the middle of the night something startled the man. He turned and there was a woman lying at his feet.
Now, these are men and women here, ish and isha in Hebrew. That definitely makes us think of sexuality. But this is important. Because remember when we talked about uncovering his feet. And how this is a euphemism that makes us think of sexuality in Hebrew.
Well now, as the story unfolds, what we see here is that Ruth has come and done exactly what Naomi told her to do. And she has very literally come, uncovered his seat and slept there. It's almost like the writer winks at you and says, get your mind out of the gutter. But just when Boaz wakes up, the text says that he is filled with fear. Literally, it says he trembled.
Now, scholars debate this a bit. Some think that this means that he shivered in the cold night and woke up. Others suggest, no, it just means he was startled by the fact that there was someone in his bed. Which to be fair, that would freak me out. Sometimes, my son leaves toys in our bed when he's playing.
And I get in bed and I don't notice them and then my foot will brush past them in the middle of the night. I mean obviously, I assume that some kind of giant spider has crawled into our bed. Right? And so I jump awake, completely awake for five minutes, my heart pounding hashtag the struggle is wheel. Children are really frustrating sometimes.
But perhaps, the best explanation is simply this. That Boaz wakes up trembling because he knows this is something that's just not permitted. He can't just have random women sleeping in his makeshift bed, especially not on the threshing floor that's out in the open where anyone could see. This is why I talked about innuendo before. Because the text leads us in one direction, it's meant to get our minds wandering, but now Boaz pulls us back to something better here.
Rather than take advantage of the situation as we might have been led to expect from the story, and rather than take advantage of Ruth as we might anticipate given the time period, this is what happens. Who are you? He asked. I am your servant Ruth, she said. Spread the corner of your garment over me since you are the guardian redeemer of our family.
Now, we'll look at Boaz's response here in a second. But first, there's something really important going on in what Ruth says. Spread the corner of your garment over me. This is more than a request to get into bed with Boaz. Now it is that.
This idea of a man spreading his cloak over a woman, this is essentially though a marriage proposal. One of the things that we have to understand about the bible is that this question that always comes up whenever I talk about sexuality, sex before marriage, is just not an issue. In much of the old testament, there are no debates about sex before marriage because sex is marriage. It just automatically comes with that commitment. And so, here, this is a very forward proposal, and it is sexual.
But it is more than that as well. This is an offer to get married. And to all the women in the room here waiting for a proposal from a man, you do you. Go ahead, get down on one knee, you pop the question yourself, don't wait for him. Now, maybe don't crawl into his bed while he's sleeping, but you know, take the initiative.
That's what I see in Ruth. Even more than that though, the corner of your garment is actually in Hebrew the word kanaf, which means literally wing. Now, it's a very well understood reference. It means the fringes or the tassels on the edge of a traditional Semitic cloak. So no one is confused about what Ruth is saying here.
And everything that we have just said stands. But here, it has a double meaning as well. Because when Boaz and Ruth spoke together earlier in chapter two, what Boaz said to her in verse 12 was this, may you be richly rewarded by the Lord, the God of Israel, under whose wing you have come to take refuge. Refuge. Same word.
And so when Ruth says, place me under your wing. This is yet another extension of that same theme that keeps popping up in the book of Ruth. That when we care for each other, when we do right by each other, when we invite each other into our lives, we are indistinguishable from the loving kindness of God in that moment. Is Ruth under God's wing? Is Ruth under Boaz wing?
Yes. But now, even more than that, what the text tells us is that this idea doesn't stop at economics. In fact, the way we choose to engage our sexuality, this too is part of our participation with the divine. Because sexuality rightly expressed as part of our giving of ourselves to another. As part of our commitment to each other, this too is part of how we embody the loving kindness of God in time and space.
Outlook. Sex can be far more than what you do with your genitals. It can be the refuge and the embrace and the loving kindness of God expressed through you toward another human being. And that might sound grandiose, but the reality is we are physical beings. And love is as much physical as it is emotional.
Love is as much practical as it is spiritual. And this is why sex was always supposed to come with safety and acceptance and fidelity built into it. See that's the assumed context from which Ruth is propositioning Boaz. It's why our sexuality is so deeply important to us as human beings. It's why we get nervous and we joke and we say things like the front parlor or the other thing or uncovering his feet.
Instead of speaking plainly because we want to be close to it. And we wanna talk about it. We long for that kind of connection and intimacy in our lives, but the truth is we're also a little bit scared of it. Sometimes it's because we've been hurt before. Sometimes it's because we just find it hard to trust each other.
Sometimes it's because we struggle to believe that our physical bodies are actually so deeply intertwined with our spiritual and our emotional selves. But what happens is we trade the largeness of our sexuality for the smallness of something easier. And you can see that here in the story. Because there is a sense that whether not it is actually her intent, we are led to presume that Naomi intends to use Ruth's sexuality as a tool to ensnare a man. There's a sense in this story that because of the time period and the social custom, we are led to wonder if Boaz will use his sexuality as a weapon to assert his position over Ruth.
To establish his dominance in the story. And we should not pretend that those ideas are all that distant to us. I mean, we use sexuality as a tool all the time. Have you seen an ad? And I mean an ad for anything.
Burgers, cars, canned mushrooms, they all somehow have sexuality attached to them these days. And so we connect sexuality to this imagined version of ourselves, and then we distort it, and we monetize it, and we sell it back to ourselves. And we do it over and over again until something that was supposed to be an expression of relationship, intimacy, and commitment ends up becoming just another tool for us to get what we want from someone. I mean, what is pornography other than sex turned into a tool? Sexuality reduced to orgasm.
I want a particular physical experience on demand without the work, without the investment, without relationship. So perform for me and look attractive for me. Do it on film for me. Become a fictional object to me instead of a living, breathing, feeling human that requires something of me in return. That is sexuality stripped of its meaning and turned into a functional tool.
It's why the struggle with pornography doesn't end the day you get married. Even if you have someone to have sex with, it's still easier to treat sexuality as a personal closed off experience, a tool for personal gratification. Then it is as the deeply human intersection of physical intimacy and emotional commitment. That that part is always going to be hard. But sometimes even worse, we use sexuality as a weapon.
And sure it's not like ancient Israel. It's not like the war zones where rape is weaponized today. But perhaps, we still subtly use sexuality in our relationships in ways that make each other feel small, or controlled, or valued, or devalued. And that's not just intercourse either. It's our ideas about beauty that we impose on each other all the time.
It's the way we demand instead of offer tenderness and affection. It's the way we withhold touch or eye contact or even a conversation until we get what we want from someone. Because we've taken intimacy and we've weaponized it for our own end. And this is not what God has in mind for us. And so after we have been led to expect all of this, both by our experience of the world around us and by our reading of the story as it unfolds so far.
This is how Boaz actually responds. He says, the Lord bless you my daughter. This kindness is greater than that which you showed earlier. You have not run after the younger men whether rich or poor. And to now my daughter do not be afraid.
I will do for you all that you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character. Although it is true that I am a guardian redeemer of our family, there is another who is more closely related than I. Stay here for the night. And in the morning, if he wants to do his deed duty as your guardian redeemer, good, let him redeem you.
But if he is not willing, as surely as the Lord lives, I will do it. Now, we will look at this idea of guardian redeemer next week. And all of the complicated familial structures that are at play in this story. But for now, let's notice the way that Boaz takes all of sexual tension in the story designed to compromise his decision making. And all of the power at his disposal to impose his desires on Ruth.
And he transforms it into the loving kindness that was always supposed to envelop our sexuality. At first, he addresses her and he says, my daughter. No longer is she the young woman who belongs to someone. She is now a person, a human. She is family.
Second, he says, I will do for you all that you ask. In other words, Ruth, you don't need to trade me your sexuality in exchange for my help. My kindness, my care, my assistance comes first. Because sex flows out of love, not into it. And then finally, he says this, there is another more closely related than I.
And this one is tougher for us to relate to. The idea that someone would have dibs to Mary Ruth, that's a little strange. And again, we will cover all of the rules and the regulations at play here next week. But what this says to me in this moment, is that this man, Boaz, this this rich and powerful man who has a young woman in his bed willing to do whatever he wants her to, he still wants her to know that sexuality flows from commitment. And sometimes, there are hoops to jump through.
Sometimes, they are cultural. Sometimes, they get in the way, and to be honest, sometimes, they even need to be changed. But he wants her to know that what he's after isn't this moment. What he's interested in is every moment that comes after this one. See, that's what makes sexuality so powerful.
Because there is this physical moment of excitement and pleasure, and it's powerful, and it's good. But what makes it great is when we get to experience that feeling safe knowing that this moment isn't all there is. You see, sex can be a tool for us to get what we want. Sex can be a weapon for us to manipulate or dominate those around us. Sex, at its best, can be a momentary expression of something that transcends itself.
A physical experience that points to an ongoing commitment, And it connects us physically to the depth of what human fidelity can be. And sometimes we try and we fail, and that's okay. Grace does not end where our sexuality begins. But what grace does is it heals and repairs, and it helps us to always imagine that there is something more. So whatever your experience of sexuality has been, positive, negative, in between, may you hear the spirit of God in this moment remind you of just how deeply loved you are.
And may you know that you are worth more than any single sexual encounter could ever fathom. You are worth the best attempt to bring the loving kindness of God down into physical, emotional, and spiritual intimacy. This is what our sexuality was made for. Let's pray. God, help us.
Because we recognize this enormous gulf that sits between us and this tale. Cultural, language, expectations, all of them are different. And yet, in the midst of that is this incredibly human story. This reaching out for care, for commitment to know that we are safe and cared for. And yet God, even as we all search for that in different ways in all of our relationships, we still have tendency to miss the mark.
To shift our imagination of sexuality even by a couple degrees, and point it in ways that become functional and just a tool for us to get what we want, or perhaps for us a way to manipulate or dominate someone around us. But instead, would you speak to us by your spirit tonight? Remind us of how deeply loved and safe we are in you. That our experience of sexuality can be something that reaches towards the best imagination of human relationships. Something that can express not just a moment, but can point to a concept, monogamy, fidelity, commitment, love, truth in ways that we can barely even begin to register.
For those of us in this room who have been hurt or perhaps we have hurt someone, we pray that your grace would remind us that we are still and always accepted and embraced. And that as we go out into all of our relationships, not just the ones that involve sexual intimacy, but any relationship that involves connection. We are expressing something deeply representative of who you are. Help us to know that we are loved and we are welcomed in your kingdom. In the strong name of the risen Christ, we pray.
Amen. Okay. Next week, we have one more chapter in Ruth, and so we will talk about the cost and the risk of that commitment that we talked about tonight, but that's next week. Tonight we'll end with this as we always do. Love God, love people, tell the story.