Booth Parker: Today on MOM-enomics we are going to talk about college tours.
So my son is just starting his senior year of high school and so college tours and
the college list has kind of been on our radar for almost a couple of years now.
And I will say that when we started the college tour process, I don't
think we went about it in the best way.
Learned some lessons and kind of revamped the way we went about it.
So, today I'm going to kind of tell you what we did the first time,
what we learned from it, what we did right, what we did wrong, how
we kind of changed the process to really help us find the right fit.
So, obviously, if your child is choosing the college path or route,
you want them to go to the school that is the right fit for them.
They are going to thrive in the right environment more than anything.
So, schools can look great on a piece of paper.
They can look great in a video.
But they may not be the right fit for your child.
So letting your child kind of discover what is the right fit for them and
finding the school that will just let them thrive and become their
best self is what we want to do as
parents.
Some kids often have a dream school that they've wanted to attend since
they were young, this, that, and the other, and their heart is set on it.
And sometimes that school ends up being the one.
Sometimes they go visit it, and it's just not what they had in their minds
and their thought process changes.
So, nearing the end of sophomore year, we decided to go tour some schools just
to get a feel for what my son wanted.
So, he didn't think at the time he wanted a big school, but he
still wanted to go check them out.
So we took two days and it was a whirlwind.
We took two days, left early, four hour drive to the first one,
saw five schools in two days.
Some were small, some were huge.
And what we did learn was that he definitely did not want the huge school.
That just was not the feeling he was going for.
And that he did tend to like the small schools, especially
the ones that you could kind of walk to a small town type area.
So we had also seen a few small schools that were fairly remote.
They didn't really have anything around them.
It was just the campus.
So he found that he was really liking the smaller school in a small town.
So that was very helpful.
What we did wrong, especially on this trip, was the whirlwind.
I thought we were, you know, gonna go kill five birds with one stone, so to speak,
but instead all we did was kind of rush through everything and not be able to
kind of stop, process, and take it all in.
So, we had a quick tour at each one, but didn't get to really see a lot of
the school, how the students interacted with each other, go to a lot of places
where students might be hanging out, and get the whole vibe, so to speak.
And so, even though a couple of the campuses were very pretty and he really
liked them, he never walked away with a true vibe of any of the schools because
it was such a rushed tour and situation.
So after that happened, I kind of changed our approach.
So we went ahead and kind of took off the huge schools that were possibly
going to be on his list and started to focus more on the smaller schools
that he thought he would like.
And so that summer before his junior year started, we did another trip, and
we went to two different schools, both small, both attached to, you know, little
towns that you could walk around in.
He knew he liked an older school with a really, really beautiful, campus.
You know, fabulous architecture, all those kind of things he was really drawn to.
And so, when I planned the trip for these next two schools, we almost kind of made
a little mini vacation out of this trip.
So, the first one, we we drove there and we checked into a cute little inn,
not some chain motel off the interstate, but a cute little inn right there in
town, right next to campus, made a dinner reservation at one of the little,
you know, mom and pop kind of local eateries right there on the main street.
And we just enjoyed the town.
Got up the next morning, coffee, breakfast.
You can see students doing their thing, how they interact with
this whole environment of this school and the town it's in.
And then we went and had a nice long tour of the school.
And then kind of came back to the town.
Dinner again that night.
We checked out a pizza place, I think, that night.
And just really casual and just got a feel for how the school
was as an environment overall.
And it was such a better experience that he really loved this school
and he also was able to really list out the pros and cons of it
because he had such an understanding of what life would be like there.
So then we proceed on to the next school on this, tour.
It was a little bit bigger school, a little bit bigger town, but
very, very similar situation.
And we did the same thing all over again.
And so while he also really liked this school, he noted that he thought he liked
the first one more just because this one was a little bigger, the town was a
little bigger, and things of that nature.
But having a more extended time period with the tour and really getting to
know the area really helped know if the school would be the right fit.
And so we go through junior year and as junior year was kind of
coming to an end, we really have to get on more college tours.
And so, we went back to the drawing board and had some more schools we
wanted to go attend, and I did it with the same approach where I took time
going and doing some research on the town that the school was a part of,
and kind of learning about the town.
What were the popular places for students to have coffee and grab
breakfast, uh, maybe grab dinner?
And we did the same approach again where we got there, we stayed in a
local inn, walked to everything, had a really, you know, drawn out tour
of the school, got to see everything.
And got to see how students interacted with each other and
how the overall environment was.
And then we went to the school that ended up being the one, the favorite.
And it was kind of the same situation.
This one, actually, the town was the smallest of the ones we've been to,
but he loved the vibe of the campus.
The town had the type of places to go, very casual atmosphere that he
likes, and the campus is stunningly beautiful, architecture is fantastic.
And so by taking the time to learn a little bit about each town and school,
booking a trip where we were right in the heart of how that school operates,
the vibe it gives, the feeling it gives, how your day would look like
as a student interacting with your friends and things of that nature.
Not being rushed through a tour where all you see is maybe a dorm room, a classroom,
the dining hall, and then you're kind of scooted along and you never really
have a true feeling or understanding of how you would fit into that environment.
So when we chose to slow the whole process down and really, really take
it as an experience, not just see a few things and roll onto the next school,
it allowed us and him, most importantly, to understand how he would fit there
and if he would fit there and if he would be able to thrive there.
And it's just so important and it's so comforting to me when he can
say, "This isn't the right fit.
I don't want this to be my place."
Or saying, "I can totally see myself here,
I would love to be here," and getting super, super excited about it.
Even though he's a homebody, his favorite is super far from home, which
obviously makes Momma sad, but to see him know that it is the right fit is
so comforting and exciting to watch.
And then, just watch him go do his thing when that day comes.
And more than anything, you know, I was, I was kind of sad that he didn't
love my alma mater or my husband's alma mater since we went to the same school.
But that was okay in the end because I love the fact that he knows where
he'll fit and what he's looking for and being that comfortable in himself
to know those things and be able to tell us and communicate those things.
So, it is a really, really great conversation to have with your kid and
really, understand what it is they're looking for, where they think they will
thrive, and supporting them in what they want and what is right for them, and
really taking the time to thoughtfully go tour schools on the list and find
the one that has the right vibe.
It's all about that vibe and feeling comfortable and knowing
your kid is going to thrive there and not just survive there.
So I know this week's podcast is kind of short and sweet, but this is the
season of life I'm in with this whole college process and seeing my friends'
kids go off to college and you know my friends becoming empty nesters.
I feel like we all just graduated from college ourselves.
But it is hard and exciting all at the same time.
It's hard because your children are growing up, but it's exciting
to see what they're going to do with their lives and being able to
support them on their right path.
So if you are starting looking at colleges or if you're in the midst of it and you're
super overwhelmed and you just can't find the right fit, slow the process down
and really take your time to find the school, give yourself
time there, find the vibe.
You know, what's funny is one of the schools we thought he would really,
really like, and there were things about the town we really liked, but
when he saw the way students kind of interacting and the way, the vibe they
gave off, he knew it wasn't his place.
It was a little, , I'm going to say pretentious, but it wasn't pretentious,
but it was just not the laid back atmosphere he was looking for.
So it's just great to put them into the actual environment that they would
be going into and let them be able to tell you if it is the right one or not.
So good luck to all you mommas on this college tour path, finding
all of these things for your kiddo.
And I look forward to seeing you next time.