“I’m just carrying it. I don’t know where forward is anymore.”
In this episode, I sit down with author, poet, and grieving mother Katie Rizzo for one of the most honest conversations I’ve had about addiction, shame, identity, and what it means to survive the loss of a child.
Katie’s son Nicholas died in September 2024 after struggling with opioid addiction. But this conversation is not just about addiction or loss. It’s about Nicholas himself. Who he was. What grief does to a body, a marriage, a family, and the impossible task of learning how to keep loving someone after they’re gone.
We talk about:
- grief as something physical, not just emotional
- the shame and isolation surrounding addiction loss
- what it means to “carry” grief
- how identity changes after losing a child
- the fear of moving forward without forgetting
- why grief groups can both heal and trap us
- the pressure grieving parents place on themselves
- the role creativity and writing can play in surviving loss
Katie also shares the story behind her upcoming memoir, The Trimesters of Grief, and her poetry collection, None of Them Are You.
At its core, this conversation is about love that refuses to disappear.
Connect with Katie:
Website: katierizzo.com
Instagram: @katierizzo007
Upcoming Books:
- The Trimesters of Grief
- None of Them Are You
Resources: robertdelfave.com
Free audio series: Not Alone — robertdelfave.com
Book a free discovery call: robertdelfave.com
The Carried Forward Podcast is hosted by Robert DelFave, grief coach, David Kessler Certified Grief Educator, and author of The Other Side of This.
New episodes released regularly.
What is Carried Forward?
Grief doesn't end, it transforms.
The Carried Forward Podcast is a conversation-driven show about what happens after loss. Not the moment of loss itself, but the long, slow, often invisible work of rebuilding identity, meaning, and purpose on the other side of it.
Host Robert DelFave is a grief coach, author, and someone who lost both parents young. He sits down with grief professionals, researchers, therapists, authors, and thought leaders to ask the questions his clients are living with every day. What does carrying grief forward actually look like? How do you rebuild who you are on the other side of this?