MARK: Welcome listeners to 'Happening in Pocatello'. It's Tuesday, March 3, 2026, and if you haven't been swept away by a gust of wind or buried in a late-season snowbank yet, congratulations. You're still here in the Gate City, where the scenery is beautiful and the social media comments are a fucking dumpster fire.

JOLEEN: And what a delightful dumpster fire it is, Mark. I'm Joleen, and I've spent my morning wondering if the city planners are playing a high-stakes game of 'SimCity' where the goal is to see how many orange cones we can fit into a three-mile radius. It's a miracle anyone can even get to work without having a complete mental breakdown, but hey, that's just the Pocatello charm.

MARK: It really is. You know, people complain about the potholes, but I like to think of them as the city's natural speed bumps. They're just keeping us safe from our own desire to actually get somewhere on time. It's thoughtful, really. Anyway, we've got a lot of shit to cover today, so let's try to get through this before the next blizzard rolls in.

JOLEEN: God, don't even joke about the weather. I'm already looking at my winter coat with pure, unadulterated hatred. But before we get to the slush report, let's talk about the actual news. We've got a lot to get through, from federal arrests to the sheer irony of our state's bank account. It's going to be a fun one.

MARK: Starting with our top headlines, it looks like Idaho's gas prices have finally decided to take a breather. They've hit the brakes recently, though experts say we could still see the three-dollar mark in just a few days. I'm sure everyone is rushing to the pump to save three cents a gallon like it's the gold rush all over again.

JOLEEN: It's hilarious watching people wait in a twenty-minute line at Costco to save a dollar on a full tank. Their time is literally worth less than the lint in my pocket. But while we're pinching pennies at the pump, the state is sitting on a mountain of cash. Idaho apparently has one point three billion dollars in rainy-day funds, and the big debate is whether that money should actually go to, you know, public schools.

MARK: Why would we do that? We need to save that billion dollars for a really big umbrella. God forbid we invest in the future. Instead, we've got local band students out here begging for money so they can perform at Disneyland. It's 2026, and we're still funding the arts via bake sales while the state sits on enough cash to buy Mickey Mouse himself.

JOLEEN: It's pathetic, Mark. Those poor kids are probably going to be selling stale cookies in front of Fred Meyer for the next three months just to play 'The Imperial March' for a bunch of tourists in ears. But speaking of music, the Idaho International Choral Festival just announced its 2026 dates. It's coming back in July, and they're already looking for host families and sponsors. They even have a ten-thousand-dollar matching grant if you donate before May.

MARK: Host families, huh? Nothing says 'welcome to Pocatello' like sticking a world-class soprano in a spare bedroom with a view of a neighbor's broken-down Chevy. But seriously, it's a cool event. It brings people from four different continents to our little corner of the world. It's probably the only time this city sounds better than a chorus of leaf blowers.

JOLEEN: Moving into the darker side of things, we've got some heavy crime news. A thirty-one-year-old man from Guatemala, Brayan Adiel Gramajo-Reyes, was arrested right here in Pocatello this past Saturday. He's facing federal charges for allegedly exploiting children for labor. The feds say he convinced two kids to come over from Guatemala with promises of opportunity and then forced them into long hours of physical labor.

MARK: That's fucking horrific. He's also looking at charges for using false statements for employment verification for workers at his business over in Caldwell. He's got a court appearance scheduled for March 5th. If he's convicted, he's looking at five years per count and millions in fines. It's a reminder that even in a place where the biggest news is usually a stolen lawn gnome, there's some real heavy shit going down.

JOLEEN: It definitely puts things in perspective. Meanwhile, the police are still cleaning up the aftermath of that double stabbing from a couple of weeks ago. The victims were identified as Rajah and Starla Keller. Luckily, they're stable, and the suspect, Marita Gonzales, is in custody. It's been a busy month for the department, which I'm sure they love. Nothing beats overtime like paperwork for a stabbing.

MARK: On a lighter note--if you can call it that--let's look at the schools. Pocatello-Chubbuck School District 25 is actually killing it right now. They just announced they have the highest graduation rate among the state's ten largest districts. Over ninety-two percent of their students graduated on time last spring. That's a hell of a lot better than the state average.

JOLEEN: That is impressive, considering how many distractions there are these days. I'm surprised any kid can put down their phone long enough to walk across a stage. They also reported solid literacy results, even though they've switched over to this new Amira Learning system that's apparently more rigorous. I don't know what that means, but I'm assuming it involves fewer pictures and more actual reading.

MARK: Let's hope so. And as we mentioned, the band students from all over the district are raising money for their Disneyland trip. If you see a kid in a marching band uniform looking desperate, maybe throw them a five-dollar bill. Or just tell them to practice their scales. Either way, they're trying.

JOLEEN: Now, let's get to the important stuff: food. We're looking at Jumbos XPress Cafe this week. It's the food trailer version of Jeri's Jumbo's Cafe, which has been a staple in this town since the sixties. The trailer is parked out on South 5th Avenue, and let me tell you, if you want breakfast that feels like a hug from a grandma who doesn't judge your life choices, this is it.

MARK: I've been there. They've got the homemade scones that are basically the size of a human head. It's heart-cloggingly delicious. The trailer is run by Heidi Hunsaker, who's the third generation of the family. She's keeping it open through the winter, which is brave. Eating a breakfast burrito while your fingers turn blue is a uniquely Idaho experience.

JOLEEN: She said she saw that area on South 5th as underserved, which is polite way of saying there was nowhere to eat but dirt out there. It's a smart move. They've got daily soups like stuffed bell pepper and pasta salads. It's homestyle cooking on wheels. Just don't expect to lose any weight within a ten-mile radius of that thing.

MARK: Switching to sports, the ISU women's basketball team had a big matchup against Sacramento State yesterday. It's been a tough season, but the Bengals always show up. And we've got to give a shout-out to Jackson Laird. He's the high schooler who ran the sixty-meter dash barefoot at the Simplot Games recently because he forgot his spikes.

JOLEEN: That kid is a legend. He scored a seven point one nine while running on a track that probably felt like sandpaper. Then he put shoes on for the finals the next day and ran the exact same time. It turns out shoes are optional if you're fast enough. I can barely walk to my car in shoes without tripping, so I have a lot of respect for that level of focus.

MARK: It's the ultimate 'I forgot my gym shoes' excuse turned into a success story. If only I could've convinced my PE teacher that running barefoot was a stylistic choice instead of just sheer incompetence. Anyway, track season is in full swing, so expect more stories of teens doing superhuman things while we complain about our back pain.

JOLEEN: Speaking of being active, we've got some community events coming up. This Thursday is the 25th Annual Tech Expo. If you want to see a bunch of gadgets and people who are much smarter than us talking about the future, that's the place to be. It's a great event for the kids, especially if they're bored of the usual 'staring at a wall' routine.

MARK: And Friday is the First Friday Artwalk in Historic Downtown. It's from five to eight p.m., and it's always a good time. You can walk around, look at local art, and pretend you're cultured while you're really just there for the free snacks and the chance to see who else is out and about. It's free to attend, and the parking is actually free too, which is the real miracle.

JOLEEN: The weekend is looking packed too. On Saturday, the Red Lion Hotel is hosting the 2026 Idaho Bridal Fair. If you're planning a wedding, or if you just want to look at dresses and feel cynical about the concept of forever, head over there from nine to two. They've even got a fashion show at one p.m. so you can see exactly how much money you're about to set on fire.

MARK: Setting money on fire is a wedding tradition, Joleen. If you're not interested in veils, the Crafters Market is back at Station Square on Saturday as well. You can pick up some local crafts and support people who are actually making things with their hands instead of just typing 'fuck' into a keyboard all day like some people we know.

JOLEEN: Hey, I take pride in my typing speed. And if you're looking for music, Mark Wills is performing at the Stepens Performing Arts Center on Saturday night. It's a big weekend for the downtown area. Just make sure you check the weather before you head out, because the forecast is... well, it's Pocatello in March.

MARK: Let's look at that forecast. Today, Tuesday, we're seeing some breaks of sun late with a high of fifty-four. That's practically tropical. Enjoy it while it lasts, because Wednesday brings showers late and a high of fifty-nine. It's that wonderful time of year where the ground is just a giant sponge of mud and regret.

JOLEEN: Thursday is when the real fun starts. We've got a mixture of precipitation coming in, and the temperature is dropping to forty-two. By Friday, it's more rain with a high of forty-five and a low of twenty-five. So everything that melts during the day is going to turn into a sheet of ice by morning. It's a great time to be an auto body shop owner.

MARK: Saturday and Sunday look a bit drier but colder, with highs in the mid-forties and lows in the low twenties. It's typical 'fool's spring' behavior. Don't go planting those tomatoes yet unless you want them to be popsicles by Monday. And speaking of things that are frozen, the road construction on Grizzly Avenue is moving forward regardless of the cold.

JOLEEN: God, Grizzly Avenue. It's going to be closed all week for a culvert replacement project near Skyline High. They started on Monday and they're basically digging a giant hole to put in a new pipe. They're telling everyone to detour using Skyline Drive and 17th Street. It's only a week, but in construction time, that usually means three months and a formal apology.

MARK: At least it's not the Center Street Underpass. That thing is still lurking in our nightmares. But it's funny how a single pipe can shut down an entire section of the city. I'm sure the traffic near the high school is just a joy right now. If you're a parent trying to drop off your kid, I suggest leaving three hours early or just giving them a bike and a helmet and wishing them luck.

JOLEEN: They'll need it. And let's wrap up with a quick look at the real estate market. If you're thinking about buying a home here, I hope you've been selling a lot of those band cookies. The latest data shows that you need to earn eighty-five thousand dollars a year to afford a typical home in Pocatello now. That's a ninety-eight percent income premium over what you need to rent.

MARK: Eighty-five grand to live in a place where the air smells like phosphorus and the main attraction is a giant neon 'P' on a hill? That's bold. The median sale price is sitting around three hundred and thirty-eight thousand dollars. It's officially more expensive to be a homeowner here than it is to just admit defeat and live in an apartment forever.

JOLEEN: It's insane. The median household income is only about seventy thousand, so there's a huge gap there. But hey, they say affordability might improve by 2027. So just hold your breath for another year or two while your rent goes up. It's the American dream, Pocatello style.

MARK: Well, on that uplifting note, that's all we've got for today. If you've got a story about a pothole that swallowed your car or a restaurant review that isn't complete shit, email us at pocatello@thehappeningnetwork.com. We might even read it if it's funny enough.

JOLEEN: Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a comment telling us how wrong we are about everything. It's what keeps us going. We love this city, even if it feels like it's trying to kill us one icy sidewalk at a time. Stay safe out there, you bunch of dickheads.

MARK: Keep it classy, Pocatello. We'll see you next time.