Show Notes
TRANSCRIPT FOR EP31
Welcome to SHE is Confident. Hi! This is Deon Teh and in this episode, I will be sharing with you about MY INNER FEAR.
We have hundreds of fears every day and our thoughts are filled with fear. Many also fear of losing money and the fear of losing out to others, for instance, is my child smarter than others, is my husband earning less than my friends’ husbands, am I working in a higher job position than my peers, etc.
Most people do not realise that these fears will block and affect our body health/ when we are so fearful, we even impose our inner strength on others, we will also use external resources to get rid of our fear within ourselves. For example, some may use the money to buy items excessively, or some may pin their hopes on others, in worse cases some will use alcohol to numb their fears or take drugs.
But if we are not able to clear out our blockages, how can we depend on external resources to help us.
We often forget about the root cause of our fears and keep on chasing after other ways to get rid of them.
Since young, I didn't have to be alone at night as I have many siblings. Even when I was working, I have my sisters with me. However, when I got married at 25, I found that I was unable to be alone at home during night time. When I’m alone, many fears start to form in my heart, making me uneasy and I could not get to sleep or sleep well.
As my husband is on shift work, there are many nights in a week that I have to be alone at home. I would even take an hour-long bus journey to my sisters’ place, just to have company and be able to fall asleep. No one understood why I was so scared of being alone at home, even I could not understand why.
When I was helping my boss to set up the company, I also had many fears which prevented me from doing my best. For instance, I was afraid that the people hired may not do a good job, I might not be able to train them well, I lack confidence in them and myself. However, all these are just my inner fears but not actual events that have happened.
The fears keep me awake at night and whenever I couldn't get to sleep. I will read books or learn English. By doing so, I unintentionally improved my English.
After picking up knowledge and skills from the books that I read, I was able to look into my fears. By practicing mindfulness, I was able to dive deep within myself and embrace my fears, this helps me to manage and get better.
At work, I learnt from my boss, who is great at making decisions and I learnt alot from him especially during the times when he was setting up the new company DDG glass Pte Ltd, my boss has shown me how he dealt with major issues bravely.
I realised that I have to let our employees face the problems first, give them help when they need it and not be fearful of bad situations may arising and not let them try to do it.
I became bolder and able to handle company issues on my own, and also drive to and fro into Malaysia for work.
I also became more daring to try out many things for my personal development like launching my own English podcast show when English is not my first language.
At work, I’m more willing to listen to others and I became a better communicator and I'm able to express my viewpoint better.
At home, I became more creative, more humorous, and had better communication with my family.
You have to trust yourself because if you don't, who will trust you? Having self-love, and self-care are the basic
If you are fearful, you will attract more fears as you are letting your subconscious mind think that you like fear. In interpersonal relationships, we fear that others might think badly of us, and when our imagination runs wild, and many relationships will be ruined.
It is easy for us to slip back to being fearful therefore we need to practice self-awareness constantly and live our lives within our means. Know that you will never feel 100% ready. When an opportunity arises, just do it and don't let fear block you from growing, and finding our life purpose or calling.
Everyone has fears and it is okay to have fears. However, it should not prevent us from doing the things we want to do just because you are fearful that the outcome might turn out bad.
You will be alright even when you have fears. Accept and embrace fear.
If you have failed after trying and things do not go your way, it could be a blessing in disguise and remember the sun will still rise the next day, and life still goes on and the earth will still continue to rotate.
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If you want to talk about transforming your inner child, healing your relationships with yourself and money, connect with me through my Facebook and the link is in the show notes.
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