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In this week's episode, Braden and Matt interview Sheldon, who shares how a life of addiction almost destroyed his marriage and family.
Show Notes
Welcome to episode #13! In this week's podcast, Braden and Matt interview the regional director for Saskatchewan for FamilyLife Canada, Sheldon Dean. Sheldon shares about how porn and addiction almost destroyed his life and marriage. He also shares how he came back from the brink to rebuilding his life and marriage, and how he got porn and addiction out of his life.
Here is a brief summary of the episode.
Here is a brief summary of the episode.
How did Sheldon Get free? What was his process?
- Got honest
- He got honest with himself and finally admitted he needed help
- Got Help
- Counseling
- Sheldon had 3 guys help him in his journey
- Got into the Bible
- Eliminated things that weren’t glorifying God
- If you want Jesus to shine in your life, you need to be putting Jesus into your life
- Got hungry for the word and read and read and read
- Memorized scripture
- Prayed anytime temptation came
- Music / Tv shows / Movies - cleaned up temptations in his life
- Eliminated things that weren’t glorifying God
There is a cost to getting porn out of your life...But it is worth it!!
There is a cost to everything we do. Ever notice that? Now that is not always a bad thing. But every yes we give means we are giving a no somewhere else in our life. So with that in mind, Sheldon came up with an acronym using the word COST.
C - CAUSE
There is a cost to everything we do. Ever notice that? Now that is not always a bad thing. But every yes we give means we are giving a no somewhere else in our life. So with that in mind, Sheldon came up with an acronym using the word COST.
C - CAUSE
- What causes us to turn to porn?
- Stress - pride - bitterness - disappointment - shame - fleshly desires - lack of self-control
- Could be a “void” or “emptiness” in us that we are trying to fill
- So often we focus on the symptom which is porn but we truly believe there is a root sin issue in our lives and it is manifesting itself in the usage of porn.
- If we can identify the root issue we can then actually start dealing with the problem and when we deal with that sin we can begin the process of freeing ourselves from porn.
O - OTHERS
- Get others involved in the journey. Sheldon had 3 men that he would text and call during those times of temptation. 3 guys helped as most of the time one of them was free
- Best to get someone who is not currently struggling in this issue
S - SCRIPTURE
- Use the bible to overcome this
- Reach for the bible instead of porn. Everytime the urge comes, or temptation comes begin reading the bible. This is also why it is so important to memorize scripture.
- There is a story in the bible where Satan tempts Jesus 3 times. One of the things that is fascinating in the story is how Jesus responds to Satan in the exchange. He doesn’t enter into conversation, he doesn’t tell himself to be strong or to just bear the burden. Jesus immediately responds with scripture. What a great example for us to follow. Which means we are going to need to spend some time in the scriptures.
T - THOUGHTS
- If we can begin to control our thoughts then when the urge comes or temptation happens we don’t let our thoughts go down the negative path.
- Colossians 3:2 “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things”
Philippians 4:8 “whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things”
Freedom is amazing!
God wants us all to have purpose and vision in marriage. Porn hi-jacks your intimacy and takes your eyes off of your purpose. When porn is out of your marriage, you'll have deeper intimacy and you'll see God at work in your marriage and in the lives of those you're impacting as well.
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Next week, Braden and Matt talk about another important topic... God's design for sex! This is so important to understand so that we have the right framework and standard, and it helps us in moving away from destructive behavior.
Resources
Fight 4 Love Ministries: A biblical plan to get porn out of your marriage
Article on FamilyLife Canada: Getting porn out of your life and marriage
Pure Freedom Community for men 18+
Pure Freedom Journey for men and women
Book a FREE call (men)
FamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriage
Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code RM30 for 30 days free
Podcast Hosts
BRADEN HAFNER
Braden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He has been married for 12 years to his wife Kristen, and they live in Edmonton, Alberta. He is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com
MATT CLINE
Matt and his wife Louise raise their little guy, David, in Edmonton, Alberta. He is honored to do what he can to tackle the epidemic of pornography and sexual perversion in every way possible. Seeing lives and marriages get free and experience the love of God in profound ways is what drives him every day. He leads Restored Ministries, is a certified speaker and coach for the John Maxwell Team, and formerly played hockey in the WHL and for Hockey Canada. You can visit www.restoredministries.ca.
WHAT IS PURE VICTORY PODCAST?
Faith-based inspiration to win at sex, conquer porn and find purpose in staying free forever.
Creators & Guests
Host
Host
Matt Cline
Matt Cline is the founder and director of Restored Ministries, focused on leading men and women out of sexual bondage and into a life of impact and freedom in Christ. He is a leading speaker and coach in Canada on the topic of sexual brokenness and has seen countless lives radically changed all around the world. You can learn more about Restored Ministries at www.restoredministries.ca.
What is Pure Victory Podcast?
Faith-based inspiration to win at sex, conquer porn, and find purpose in staying free forever.