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listening to Warrior Saint.

2
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Welcome.

3
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left a week ago Monday, we got here Monday night and then starting last Tuesday, I've
taught every single day for seven days and I still have another six days in a row to go.

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So I've never like taught like 13, 14 days in a row.

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It's not the whole day, it's still normally if I travel, you know, I'll teach, I'll take
some breaks, but I've never like taught.

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this intensively.

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So it's quite the experience.

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And because of that, I have spent very little time preparing.

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I'll just kind of show up and wing it.

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Yeah, who are you teaching?

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uh Well, you know, I almost made the mistake of the people who hosting me.

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You know, I'm teaching in different yoga studios in uh Bogota, in retreats.

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And so uh I have a nice list of uh different types of courses I could offer.

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And uh maybe it would have been better just to say, you know, on this tour, I'll just do
this.

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But I said, OK, you know, to ask the people.

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what they want and land up like every night they wanted a different one.

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So it's almost like every night I'm doing something different.

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One night I'm talking about the relationships, the next night about the, know, you know,
Carmen reincarnation and, you know, like yoga philosophy.

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Another night about, you know, advanced meditation and about, know, the of the show,
Warrior Saint.

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So a pretty broad range of topics.

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one night I'll just go in there and we'll do the soul, all your saints stuff.

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It's a really tough class.

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And the next night we're talking about and relationships.

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It's a very light class.

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So that's how it's been.

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It looks like Bogota is a huge city.

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Yeah, it's a really big city.

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uh But I think actually New York may be bigger.

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I didn't look, but I think it's about 8, 10 million.

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It's one of these uh like La Paz and Quito.

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It's one of these South American capitals that's actually at very high altitude.

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So it's really interesting.

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It's very close to the equator.

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it's never really hot here.

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So if you actually went down in elevation, it would be like tropical.

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And actually they refer to this as being tropical, but the weather here is a lot like
Seattle.

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It looks kind of overcast.

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It is, it's overcast and it's kind of rainy and parts of the day could be hot but parts of
the day could be cool.

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It's not what you would think a tropical climate is.

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It's really not.

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There's no palm trees.

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It's kind of overcast a lot.

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I don't actually...

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I'm actually crazy about Bogota.

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You say it's lovely.

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I love...

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Colombia in general.

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I really like the people here.

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And the food is fabulous.

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And I'm a foodie.

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I'll tell you, well, I'll tell you one thing.

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It's got one thing, a couple of things Colombia's got going for it in general.

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The food is unbelievable.

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And they have fruits and vegetables here.

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I actually, not only do I not know their names, I've actually never seen fruits like this.

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That's cool.

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I know it's amazing.

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It's absolutely amazing.

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You go into like the grocery here and there's fruits.

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You have no idea what it is and you don't even know what it's going to taste.

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Is it going to be sour?

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Is it going to be sweet?

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They really don't vegetables and fruits.

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mean, everything grows here.

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They say I think there's something called the Kwaka Valley around where Kali is.

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And they say that it's like the most fertile place in the planet.

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You could take a handful of seeds and just throw it out there and something's going to
grow.

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It's totally amazing.

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And of course, the coffee here, I'm a coffee guy, so coffee here is to die for.

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Although, of course, the best coffee they export.

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Yeah, it's almost hard to find good coffee to drink here because it's odd.

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I mean, I've had some of the worst coffee of my life here.

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you know what they do?

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It's really crazy.

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take the best beans, right?

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And they send them to Europe and the United States.

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And with the crap that's left over, that's what the people here drink.

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But you can get some good coffee here, like Juan Valdez.

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Actually, I have a funny Juan Valdez story.

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Do you remember, you know who Juan Valdez is?

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You know, from the commercials?

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like Colombian Coffee, they've been doing this for decades.

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He was like the representative of Colombian Coffee and it was actually a person and then
it was a movie act, you know, it just a caricature.

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So I sent out, it's funny, a couple years ago, some of my friends know that, you know,
especially from my past know that I travel around the world and do crazy things and

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they're always kind of amazed what I do.

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So I sent out an email that,

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You know, I was in Columbia and I had uh coffee, a really great coffee at Juan Valdez.

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And Juan Valdez here is actually a chain like Starbucks.

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ah So my friend writes back in amazement.

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He goes, Oh, I can't believe your life.

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You actually had coffee with Juan Valdez.

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No, man, there is no Juan Valdez.

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It's like Starbucks.

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Hahaha

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So the coffee's here, the produce is amazing.

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The people are some of the warmest people in the world.

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mean, when I come here, it's like anybody I meet here, it's like family for life.

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They really come from the heart.

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And also, I have to say, the most beautiful women in the world here in Venezuela.

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I don't know what it is.

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I don't know if it's the air or the water or what.

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or they have uh cosmetic surgeons, I don't know what it is.

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It's really, and you can see it's interesting.

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you've ever watched Miss Universe, whatever, it's always from like Colombia and Venezuela.

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But it's I don't know what it is, the mix of the Spanish and the indigenous, but people
are very, very attractive here.

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Men too, people are very attractive.

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So it's interesting.

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a country, I came here to teach spiritual themes, but I'm very interested in politics and
social things and social justice and politics and all those kind of things in economy.

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the country, ah it's got its own karma.

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That's all I could say.

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uh

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itself has its

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The country has a karma like Haiti.

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Haiti seems to have some kind of karma.

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know, Haiti's on the same island as the Dominican Republic, but it's like Haiti's got its
own karma.

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You know, could be like earthquakes and hurricanes and Dominican Republic, it doesn't get
touched, but Haiti gets wiped out every time.

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it's kind of, Colombia just has uh a certain karma here that's very odd.

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It's like...

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You know, as I said, the people are beautiful and the land is like, there's probably more
resources here per square mile than any place on the planet.

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I mean, they've got oil, although I think Venezuela's got more, but the land is so
fertile.

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I mean, it's unbelievable.

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They can grow anything here.

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They've got water, they've got forests, but the country is a mess.

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You know, they really been involved in a war here for probably 100 years.

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it's almost like, it's interesting.

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It's almost sometimes you get blessed with something and then it lands up to be a curse.

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So, like here in Columbia, it's arguably one of the most fertile places in the whole
world, but it's so fertile that it also grows stuff like coca.

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And this really has really been a major defining thing in the whole country here for
decades.

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uh It's uh destroyed many, many lives and it's made Colombia kind of like the pariah of
the world.

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And it's an extremely violent country.

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I mean, I rarely meet a person who has not been the victim

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of violence.

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it was very rare.

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In fact, the other day, I went to teach a yoga class at yoga studio and I got there and
one of the proprietors of the yoga studio just, she was, know, she was, you know, kind of

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taking, you know, taking the names of the people coming into class and I was looking at
her, but she was doing okay, but she just looked a little shook up and I go, you know, are

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you okay?

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He goes, yeah, you know, I was coming here, I was on the bus, somebody put a knife to me
and uh said if they didn't give me their money, uh they'd kill me.

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You know, I got a little cut here, they cut my arm with the knife.

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And the police came and they had like an undercover guy in the bus.

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And I had to go to the police station and the...

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Mother was there, because this was like a teenager, and she offered me her cell phone if I
didn't make a report.

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know, it's like crazy.

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You you can't make this stuff up.

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And I actually have met uh quite a few people here who've had members of their family
actually kidnapped and killed.

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And it's so common that nothing would actually surprise you.

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And there's so many people who are involved with this at so many levels of the society,
know, the violence and the drug activity, ah that it has completely dominated the entire

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society.

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So Bogota in particular is, and I hope you don't mind knowing we talk about kind of these
spiritual things.

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Yeah, you know, it's a really interesting city because if you come to Bogota,

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You think you are like in, uh if you're like in the central center town, you think you
were like in, I don't know, like Philadelphia or Nashville, Tennessee, or, it's a booming

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place.

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And actually the cost of real estate is like skyrocketing.

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And if you're in kind of like the center districts of town, mean, people live very
affluently.

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and their beautiful condominiums, big windows and great shopping and terrific restaurants
and I go on and on and you think this is like an amazing place but there's every play

155
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there but there's armed guards everywhere.

156
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You know what I'm saying?

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Like you can't live in a, I mean obviously there's doorman in every place but it's not
just for show.

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It's a very high security place.

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And I think it's better now than it was like five years ago.

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But you always have the sense that there's like danger lurking.

161
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But yet people are very affluent here, but not everybody.

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So it's like one of these countries where maybe 40 % of the people are doing like super
well and money goes a long way.

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But then a lot of people here are living hand to mouth.

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And it's not necessarily in the center of town.

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There are places where you wouldn't necessarily go at night.

166
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But that's a good part of the city, especially in other places in South America.

167
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there still continues to be a tremendous divide among the uh educated, uneducated, the
poor and the rich.

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uh it's like, for instance, in the United States, there are people who are wealthy who
have quote unquote, health.

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in the house, know, people take care of the house and cook, you know, take care of the
kids.

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But usually it's only the very affluent that have actually people taking care of the house
for them.

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But here, like in Bogota, in other places in South America, everybody has helped.

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I mean, everybody, if you have a job here, like, I'm not talking about like a CEO of a
company.

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If you're like a school teacher, you have somebody taking care of the house for you.

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In the United States, that would be unheard of.

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I mean, if you have any kind of like middle-class job here, you have somebody who does the
cooking and cleaning and all that, and it costs hardly anything.

176
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Right, and there's minimum wage, mean, I'm sure.

177
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There may be, but that kind of stuff probably is not checked in too.

178
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And the people who are working, they're desperate, so they're not going to say no to
anything.

179
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So just kind of like this, it's like India is like that too.

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It's kind of like the

181
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Culture say yeah, I've friends in India and my friend recently living in Kenya and they
were both I Mean it was a surprise to both of them I think when they moved into an

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apartment and the help was a package deal with the apartment There were women who just who
lived there and they were like, you live here.

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I'm your I'm your maid.

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I'm and that's what I do and um My friend in India the maid

185
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slept on the kitchen counter.

186
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Yeah.

187
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it's just, mean, it was, it's just how things are.

188
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That's how things are and you don't see them changing anytime soon.

189
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ah But that's it's kind of the society and it even, you know, it's kind of interesting and
even kind of seeps into this whole world of spirituality even.

190
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Because, you know, you come to South America and who are the people who really practice
yoga and meditation for instance?

191
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It's kind of like, uh you know, it's the affluent people.

192
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It's like they have the luxury.

193
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It is like here.

194
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It's like the, but it's even more pronounced here.

195
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It's like, you know, you'll have yoga studios in the upscale neighborhoods, you know, and
the people will get into the yoga meditation as, uh you know, it's kind of like an in

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thing to do.

197
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You know, that's what everybody's doing.

198
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And I don't know how long that'll last.

199
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but it's kind of things that people can do if they have some extra cash.

200
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But I would bet anything that if you go into the neighborhoods where the average person
lives, that ah maybe they don't even have the extra time to get into some of kind of

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self-development.

202
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But these are the people who probably need this kind of stuff the most.

203
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uh

204
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And it is, it's almost this kind new age religion is actually in, you know, third world is
very class oriented, which is interesting.

205
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Sure, I I think that you see a lot of people just buying into things.

206
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I mean, it's really easy to spend money and kind of say to yourself, I'm doing that.

207
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Like if you buy diet food, you tell yourself that you're on a diet, even if you eat
cheeseburgers, you know.

208
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Right?

209
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Yeah, this kind of like a social norm of, you know, it's a different value, know, certain
value systems, you know.

210
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Yeah, but I think that, I mean, I have a hard time thinking that everybody who takes a
yoga class, you know, is there because of their spiritual development.

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And some people are there because they're just curious and people are there because they
like the way that they look on a yoga mat.

212
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Some people are there because they really are looking for something deeper.

213
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mean, I don't think it's always a conscious thing.

214
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So I'm

215
00:17:35,778 --> 00:17:49,127
You know, I wonder if like, if you think yoga is powerful enough so that even people who
come in with a uh non-spiritual intent, you know, even just the intention to get a good

216
00:17:49,127 --> 00:17:59,514
workout on, if these other things that yoga can provide someone, if that can rub off on
you.

217
00:17:59,608 --> 00:18:05,703
Well, you know, this has really been a constant theme on this particular tour.

218
00:18:05,703 --> 00:18:20,976
um Because I'm visiting well and to answer your question, ah I think practicing yoga and
doing meditation, things like this are going to be a tremendous help to anybody.

219
00:18:20,976 --> 00:18:23,258
There's nobody who are not going to gain from it.

220
00:18:23,258 --> 00:18:28,502
ah And it's

221
00:18:29,006 --> 00:18:33,466
You it's like this, it's like a healthy thing to do.

222
00:18:33,466 --> 00:18:39,494
I it's like, you know, I don't know, you know, it's

223
00:18:42,506 --> 00:18:43,386
Oh, right.

224
00:18:43,386 --> 00:18:46,978
think that's kind of where I'm at on this particular tour.

225
00:18:46,978 --> 00:18:56,806
actually, this tour also is kind of changing my own personal trajectory because we're
clarifying or crystallizing it.

226
00:18:57,815 --> 00:19:10,881
on the one hand, uh unlike other things in life, I don't see any downside to somebody
practicing something like this because it's actually a very healthy thing to do.

227
00:19:11,906 --> 00:19:16,848
you're going, it's designed to improve your health.

228
00:19:16,948 --> 00:19:26,172
It's designed to lower your uh reaction to stress and ability to handle stress.

229
00:19:26,172 --> 00:19:33,275
It's designed to uh help you take more control of your mind.

230
00:19:33,735 --> 00:19:39,826
These are all like, mean, I can't even name one negative thing about it.

231
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:47,454
It's just a healthy thing to do unless like anything else in life it becomes obsessive,
you know, but that's another issue.

232
00:19:48,835 --> 00:20:00,482
the technology itself is just very healthy and it doesn't matter uh whether you're a very
religious person or you're an atheist.

233
00:20:00,482 --> 00:20:04,745
used to teach yoga in the prisons for many years.

234
00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:05,205
Cool.

235
00:20:05,205 --> 00:20:06,880
uh

236
00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:20,952
And so, know, and the people who were in know, people who would be in the room doing the
yoga with me were people who were like rapists and murderers and, you know, deathbed and

237
00:20:20,952 --> 00:20:22,203
child molesters.

238
00:20:22,203 --> 00:20:24,920
And, you know, they got something out of it.

239
00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:26,650
mean, everybody can get something out of it.

240
00:20:26,650 --> 00:20:27,807
It's just healthy for you.

241
00:20:27,807 --> 00:20:36,032
um I think what I'm seeing on this particular trip is that the way that

242
00:20:36,032 --> 00:20:42,596
most people relate to it is on kind of a mediocre level.

243
00:20:42,596 --> 00:20:50,652
It's kind of a technique to better your life and uplift yourself, which it does.

244
00:20:51,092 --> 00:20:56,616
But in my own opinion, yoga is not a spiritual path.

245
00:20:57,517 --> 00:21:04,921
And then the people who are really into it, who consider it a spiritual path, get really
mad at me.

246
00:21:05,454 --> 00:21:11,566
uh You know, see it as being a spiritual path and I actually don't.

247
00:21:11,566 --> 00:21:25,972
I see yoga as being a helpful tool that's one of your tools in your toolkit to on the road
to uh self-development and ultimately uh liberation.

248
00:21:25,984 --> 00:21:33,622
Yeah, so would you agree that a spiritual path is isn't something that you can see it's
not a practice.

249
00:21:33,622 --> 00:21:38,247
I mean, I think that it's it's something very internal.

250
00:21:38,247 --> 00:21:46,074
It's it's a way of feeling about the world and you know, the way that you account for your
own life and your actions.

251
00:21:47,002 --> 00:21:49,073
Well, no, that's interesting.

252
00:21:49,073 --> 00:22:02,116
That's interesting that you would throw that out there because this week in particular, I
have been thinking and talking a lot about this and kind of trying to nail all of this

253
00:22:02,116 --> 00:22:03,106
down.

254
00:22:04,342 --> 00:22:16,150
I think that maybe what you're suggesting may not be a spiritual path itself because a
path kind of infers a direction.

255
00:22:16,622 --> 00:22:29,407
But I think that spiritual consciousness is a way of being, not a technique, which is,
think, close to what you're saying.

256
00:22:29,628 --> 00:22:36,470
you know, if you're, uh you know, the things that you do are the things that get you to
where you want to go.

257
00:22:37,071 --> 00:22:41,452
But ultimately, we're talking about a way of being.

258
00:22:42,342 --> 00:22:44,822
I...

259
00:22:44,822 --> 00:22:58,750
I think what I'm seeing is, uh and it's really interesting because it really reflects how
the world is, is that there right now in the world of uh especially what I'd call like new

260
00:22:58,750 --> 00:23:13,004
age thing, like yoga and things that people are kind of importing into the West that were
developed elsewhere, uh people think if they just do yoga that

261
00:23:13,004 --> 00:23:15,955
they're going to somehow be liberated.

262
00:23:16,054 --> 00:23:30,023
But to me, there's a disconnect between the spiritual practice and the way that a person
is living in the world.

263
00:23:30,163 --> 00:23:42,561
And so I'm finding that a lot of people who practice yoga, even for 10 to 20 years, are no
more developed as a person than anyone else I know.

264
00:23:42,561 --> 00:23:43,348
Yeah.

265
00:23:43,348 --> 00:23:49,404
And then I say that and people get really angry at me because sometimes I go someplace and
they want to be validated.

266
00:23:49,665 --> 00:23:59,706
And I'm just trying to be honest, you know, you know, it's like, yeah, you you could touch
your head to the floor, you know, bending over, you stand on your head for 10 minutes, but

267
00:23:59,706 --> 00:24:01,918
that doesn't mean you're an honest person.

268
00:24:02,156 --> 00:24:02,626
Right.

269
00:24:02,626 --> 00:24:04,887
Well, yeah, yoga on and off the mat.

270
00:24:04,887 --> 00:24:09,929
mean, and learning how to take what you've learned in yoga.

271
00:24:09,929 --> 00:24:20,874
mean, yoga, think in some ways is meant to be seen as a uh yoga session, for instance, can
be seen as a metaphor for your life or its own journey.

272
00:24:20,874 --> 00:24:29,578
So whatever you struggle with that day and you hopefully find some peace with or able to
let go of in the session.

273
00:24:29,582 --> 00:24:43,182
you know, later in the week when you're on the subway and you start flipping out in your
own mind and getting all tense, I think, I mean, that's the point of thinking of it as off

274
00:24:43,182 --> 00:24:46,362
the mat yoga, you know, here you are.

275
00:24:46,592 --> 00:24:48,106
That's what they saying.

276
00:24:48,787 --> 00:24:58,425
I mean, is that, you not even find anything in that concept that that's not even something
that people can take away from yoga?

277
00:24:58,646 --> 00:25:01,034
can, but I just think it's overrated.

278
00:25:01,431 --> 00:25:02,301
Why?

279
00:25:02,958 --> 00:25:08,952
Uh, because I don't think it's untrue, but I think there are metaphors in everything you
do in life.

280
00:25:08,952 --> 00:25:11,584
Everything is connected.

281
00:25:11,584 --> 00:25:17,969
So, you know, you could take lessons that you learn from work into your married life.

282
00:25:17,969 --> 00:25:21,221
you know, you can connect everything.

283
00:25:21,221 --> 00:25:25,198
you know, of course, I mean, there's, there's metaphors in the yoga class.

284
00:25:25,198 --> 00:25:40,201
And of course, I mean, it's very helpful, you know, you're releasing things there and so
you can kind of release, you can, I mean, of course there is, but to me, um I think in my

285
00:25:40,201 --> 00:25:47,637
own personal path that the highest level of spiritual development has to do with issues of
character.

286
00:25:48,518 --> 00:25:53,110
And so I do not necessarily see the connection.

287
00:25:53,110 --> 00:26:03,918
between just let's say practicing hatha yoga and you other than I think the one thing the
one thing I think there's one piece of character you definitely get out of having a daily

288
00:26:03,918 --> 00:26:20,009
discipline of actual physical yoga is that uh self-discipline is a very important uh
character trait and it's very self-discipline ah is it's very hard to be successful in

289
00:26:20,009 --> 00:26:21,170
life without it.

290
00:26:21,774 --> 00:26:30,514
And it's a character builder that you do what you train people by nature are not this
self-discipline.

291
00:26:30,694 --> 00:26:33,814
Self-discipline is the kind of thing where you have to make yourself.

292
00:26:33,814 --> 00:26:39,594
You have to have like a will to do something and then you just do it and you do it
regularly.

293
00:26:39,594 --> 00:26:49,074
that's one, it's not everything, but that's one factor in developing your character.

294
00:26:49,874 --> 00:27:02,653
in the end of the day, every spiritual path is different, but I'm getting more more
clarity that the path that I represent at the end of the day is almost exclusively about

295
00:27:02,653 --> 00:27:04,224
character development.

296
00:27:04,364 --> 00:27:14,631
that yoga, as you said, is actually just one piece in a larger uh panorama of character
development.

297
00:27:14,631 --> 00:27:19,214
And that the path that I represent is that the

298
00:27:19,278 --> 00:27:27,038
The highest level of liberation on this path is actually when your character is absolutely
pure.

299
00:27:27,258 --> 00:27:29,378
And that's what you're aiming to do.

300
00:27:29,518 --> 00:27:41,598
So the practice of yoga within spiritual development is actually to the extent that it
will help you develop your character as a human being.

301
00:27:41,838 --> 00:27:49,062
And this has been a really interesting week because it somehow, every class I teach, lands
up

302
00:27:49,078 --> 00:27:54,842
making like a hard right turn somewhere in the class that that's what it's about.

303
00:27:55,002 --> 00:28:06,240
And so at the end of the day, it's, and I'm not saying this is true with every path,
although every path gets you to the same place in some way, I'm finding more and more

304
00:28:06,240 --> 00:28:10,853
clarity that this particular path is about character development.

305
00:28:10,853 --> 00:28:12,078
And then that's the aim.

306
00:28:12,078 --> 00:28:17,598
The aim is to be the most noble person you could be on the planet.

307
00:28:17,614 --> 00:28:21,454
that is actually how you will experience liberation.

308
00:28:22,514 --> 00:28:40,614
It's interesting because now that I'm teaching here, not all, but most of the people who I
land up teaching, you know, here probably 70 % are people who are aligned in the same yoga

309
00:28:40,614 --> 00:28:47,470
practice that I am and have been taught the same, you know, tool

310
00:28:47,470 --> 00:28:48,550
toolkit.

311
00:28:49,531 --> 00:29:02,236
But when I go to teach it anywhere in the world these days, it seems that the people are
they're growing, but there's kind of a disconnect with what I've been talking about.

312
00:29:02,396 --> 00:29:10,339
And nobody's actually even uh suggested to them that that is the goal of all of this.

313
00:29:10,339 --> 00:29:16,102
So I actually find that a lot of the people who are practicing this are uh a little lost.

314
00:29:17,090 --> 00:29:20,669
They're really enjoying what they're doing, but they don't know why they're doing it.

315
00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:22,990
they're doing the yoga.

316
00:29:22,990 --> 00:29:33,410
Yeah, mean, they have like to me an ambiguous, ambiguous reasons for doing because often I
ask people and it's ambiguous.

317
00:29:33,450 --> 00:29:36,990
So they're enjoying it, which is great.

318
00:29:36,990 --> 00:29:45,190
But it doesn't kind of have the supercharged power behind it of actually having a
direction to it.

319
00:29:45,190 --> 00:29:47,342
And so I think that's the difficulty.

320
00:29:47,342 --> 00:30:00,046
uh I think it's really curious though that you're that the because you keep talking about
having a direction and that you know a path implies that you're going someplace and to me

321
00:30:00,046 --> 00:30:14,380
that sounds counterintuitive actually because I think it's really rare that we ever have a
crystallized idea of where we're going I mean you know I think people have inclinations

322
00:30:14,380 --> 00:30:15,970
towards certain things

323
00:30:15,998 --> 00:30:30,108
And it's more of, think maybe part of human development or spiritual development is having
the balls to go after something that's just a feeling that you have and not really knowing

324
00:30:30,108 --> 00:30:39,735
where it's going, but knowing, but having the wherewithal to kind of feel which way the
wind is blowing and saying, okay, I'm gonna go this way.

325
00:30:39,735 --> 00:30:42,637
I don't know why, but I'm going over here.

326
00:30:42,637 --> 00:30:44,518
em

327
00:30:44,586 --> 00:30:47,008
I was just talking about that last night.

328
00:30:47,008 --> 00:30:49,449
I mean, I do, it's how I see it.

329
00:30:49,449 --> 00:31:06,491
think that, I think it's very hard to be fulfilled if there's not, and again, people would
disagree and I, you know, I respect all everybody's point of view, but from my own

330
00:31:06,491 --> 00:31:14,566
observation, I just think it's very hard to be absolutely fulfilled if there's a lack of
purpose.

331
00:31:15,182 --> 00:31:27,782
Okay, so the person could be relatively happy, but the people who I feel are person who
are like really on another level just feel very fulfilled with their whole life are people

332
00:31:27,782 --> 00:31:32,742
who have a sense of mission and purpose, not people just kind of just hanging out.

333
00:31:32,742 --> 00:31:43,854
And I think a piece of that is what you've said is that part of that development is that
there comes a point where you, and I don't even know if it's like an emotional feeling.

334
00:31:43,854 --> 00:31:46,781
because I don't actually trust emotions.

335
00:31:47,043 --> 00:31:49,920
I think they have purposes, but they don't.

336
00:31:50,171 --> 00:31:52,377
I don't mean emotion, but I mean...

337
00:31:52,630 --> 00:31:53,086
You mean...

338
00:31:53,086 --> 00:31:54,526
You just have a...

339
00:31:54,609 --> 00:31:55,854
I just have something.

340
00:31:55,854 --> 00:32:06,080
You know, you actually described and people, people I think misuse the word, but you
really are talking about the difference between emotion and intuition.

341
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:08,941
Intuition is when you just know.

342
00:32:08,981 --> 00:32:12,043
You don't actually have any emotional feeling tagged with it.

343
00:32:12,043 --> 00:32:25,774
It's kind of like you just know and, and you're, you, you have enough clarity where you
just trust yourself that you're not being impulsive or you're not reacting to some, um,

344
00:32:25,774 --> 00:32:38,914
some emotion being dragged from somewhere else is kind of like, you know, you just know
you accepted, you trust, you trust that your knowing is, you know, is this truth to it and

345
00:32:38,914 --> 00:32:44,194
you act on it, even though it may be inconvenient in the short term.

346
00:32:45,054 --> 00:32:53,634
you know, I was, I was sharing with the class actually last night, a couple of instances
in my own life that were very, very big, you know, I was 27 and I didn't know what the

347
00:32:53,634 --> 00:32:54,796
hell I was doing.

348
00:32:54,796 --> 00:33:04,646
and i actually you know i think we share this another episode i i decided that i was going
to come to seek in in very short order change my name let my beard grow put a turban on

349
00:33:04,646 --> 00:33:06,985
and i i don't know what the hell i was doing

350
00:33:07,272 --> 00:33:09,381
And you were conflicted.

351
00:33:09,381 --> 00:33:13,485
were driving there going, fuck, fuck, fuck, I don't want to do this.

352
00:33:13,698 --> 00:33:23,453
But the thing that was conflicting me was my emotional reaction and my fantasies.

353
00:33:23,453 --> 00:33:35,129
mean, was like, the things that were getting me nuts is just me reacting to fantasizing
what the consequences would be and my fears of what I would be losing.

354
00:33:35,458 --> 00:33:35,884
But...

355
00:33:35,884 --> 00:33:44,019
the intuitive part was is that deep down I just knew that it was the right thing to do
even though I couldn't give you a reason.

356
00:33:44,019 --> 00:34:00,010
And as it turned out, I trusted that and that fortunately for me, my passion and my belief
in that my intuition was more trustworthy than my feelings landed up overpowering my

357
00:34:00,010 --> 00:34:00,846
fears.

358
00:34:00,846 --> 00:34:06,566
And here I am like 40 years later and I saw up to this point I've won every battle.

359
00:34:06,566 --> 00:34:13,686
And because I've always gone with the intuition and as I told you a few years ago, I was
in Portland, Oregon.

360
00:34:13,686 --> 00:34:18,446
I love living in Oregon and I had a very comfortable life there.

361
00:34:18,446 --> 00:34:20,106
Why would I want to mess my life up?

362
00:34:20,106 --> 00:34:22,686
And one day I just said to my wife, let's get back.

363
00:34:22,686 --> 00:34:24,106
We're going to Manhattan.

364
00:34:24,846 --> 00:34:25,786
What?

365
00:34:26,046 --> 00:34:26,886
And she was why?

366
00:34:26,886 --> 00:34:29,166
And I'm going, I don't know.

367
00:34:30,222 --> 00:34:32,243
But I don't know.

368
00:34:32,243 --> 00:34:34,505
It's tell that.

369
00:34:34,505 --> 00:34:40,890
But I started laughing and I said, I'm about to throw my whole life into uh like a
whirlwind.

370
00:34:40,890 --> 00:34:42,417
I'm going to put everything in storage.

371
00:34:42,417 --> 00:34:44,513
I'm going to move away from my beautiful home.

372
00:34:44,513 --> 00:34:47,045
I'm going to lose everything I don't have a job to go to.

373
00:34:47,045 --> 00:34:49,778
I don't know what I'm going to be facing tomorrow.

374
00:34:49,778 --> 00:34:55,872
But I'm willing to risk my entire life, actually, and my comfort and everything.

375
00:34:55,946 --> 00:35:08,257
and walking away from friends and everything to go into like one black hole because I just
trusted that it was the right thing to do.

376
00:35:08,257 --> 00:35:11,920
And I actually gave no thought to it whatsoever, nothing.

377
00:35:11,920 --> 00:35:18,044
I had not one good logical reason to do it other than it's time and that's where I need to
be.

378
00:35:18,145 --> 00:35:24,290
And as it's turned out, uh it did give me what I needed.

379
00:35:24,454 --> 00:35:26,235
and I have to trust that.

380
00:35:26,374 --> 00:35:38,186
I consistently trust my intuition, but I think one reason I'm willing to do that is that
at this point in my life, I'm able to separate my intuition from my feelings.

381
00:35:38,186 --> 00:35:41,149
I never want to make a decision based on my feelings.

382
00:35:41,149 --> 00:35:51,910
And then also sometimes you try to think things through, but the mind is kind of funny
because the mind tends to talk you out of things.

383
00:35:51,910 --> 00:35:58,251
I mean, that's what it's, you you have a cool idea and then it starts, it starts
de-powering that idea.

384
00:35:58,251 --> 00:35:59,113
It's a weird thing.

385
00:35:59,113 --> 00:36:00,646
It's just like, you know, yeah.

386
00:36:00,646 --> 00:36:04,953
So I, I, my thing is, you know, just uh like you said.

387
00:36:04,953 --> 00:36:05,362
oh

388
00:36:05,362 --> 00:36:18,174
had a formative experience, like because you took the biggest risk you could have possibly
taken at that moment when you moved and devoted yourself to this.

389
00:36:18,354 --> 00:36:19,562
And it worked out.

390
00:36:19,562 --> 00:36:28,254
I mean, you are living proof that whatever that was wasn't an accident or wasn't a fluke
or that, whatever, that you were finally...

391
00:36:28,254 --> 00:36:31,086
I mean, life...

392
00:36:31,086 --> 00:36:42,906
sucks, like life is crazy, things don't work out, but when you did this one thing and you
relied on this nerve that you'd never relied on before and it worked out for you, now you

393
00:36:42,906 --> 00:36:43,906
know.

394
00:36:45,266 --> 00:36:45,846
So...

395
00:36:45,846 --> 00:36:46,866
yeah.

396
00:36:47,002 --> 00:36:57,202
Well, and you know, and you just said a couple of things that I think I'm trying not to
forget what you just said, because you said a couple of things that really kind of hit me.

397
00:36:57,202 --> 00:37:00,622
One is you said it worked out.

398
00:37:00,762 --> 00:37:01,501
OK.

399
00:37:02,182 --> 00:37:07,962
And to me, that's not an insignificant thing, because actually.

400
00:37:08,702 --> 00:37:13,102
A person has to define for themselves what it working out means.

401
00:37:13,198 --> 00:37:19,238
Okay, so things working out for me may not be what it means to somebody else.

402
00:37:19,298 --> 00:37:23,618
So for me, you have to be very clear.

403
00:37:23,618 --> 00:37:24,758
Again, it gets back to you.

404
00:37:24,758 --> 00:37:28,438
You've got to be clear what your values are.

405
00:37:29,178 --> 00:37:35,998
things work out if they strengthen or feed your values.

406
00:37:35,998 --> 00:37:38,618
They don't work out if it's not important to you.

407
00:37:38,618 --> 00:37:40,844
So for me, my...

408
00:37:40,844 --> 00:37:45,116
My purpose in my life, my mission is self-development.

409
00:37:45,256 --> 00:37:47,387
I mean, that's what I value.

410
00:37:47,387 --> 00:37:50,659
I value personal growth and spiritual growth.

411
00:37:50,659 --> 00:37:53,260
If you would have a list, that would be at the top of my list.

412
00:37:53,260 --> 00:38:00,604
So for instance, coming when I came to New York, I actually am probably poorer now than
when I started.

413
00:38:00,604 --> 00:38:05,486
My life is like totally in free fall.

414
00:38:06,018 --> 00:38:11,560
I mean, if anything, I have less stability in my life now than I had three years ago.

415
00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:13,900
Most people would go, my God, my life is...

416
00:38:13,900 --> 00:38:23,043
If most people were in my shoes, they would say this was a crazy thing, it was the wrong
decision, my life is falling apart, I fucked up, I blew it.

417
00:38:23,063 --> 00:38:24,503
It was a stupid thing.

418
00:38:24,503 --> 00:38:35,136
But my value uh is growth and self-development, and I feel that doing this has actually
accelerated my growth.

419
00:38:35,234 --> 00:38:44,557
because it's been so challenging, yet I've met so many incredible people like yourself,
who I never would have met had I not come to New York, I don't think.

420
00:38:44,577 --> 00:38:50,799
So, uh you know, I have a different value system of defining things working out even.

421
00:38:50,799 --> 00:39:02,222
You know, so I think it's, unless person's clear about what their purpose and mission is,
it's even hard to really say whether things have worked out or not, compared to what,

422
00:39:02,222 --> 00:39:02,902
right?

423
00:39:02,902 --> 00:39:03,372
Right.

424
00:39:03,372 --> 00:39:05,674
Well, I mean, there are no straight lines.

425
00:39:05,674 --> 00:39:20,235
And I really think that, I mean, when you talk to people who um have amazing lives and are
successful, like yesterday, Sophie and I went to visit these people who have grown bonsai

426
00:39:20,235 --> 00:39:21,896
for like 40 years.

427
00:39:21,896 --> 00:39:25,249
They've had a bonsai business and they're spiritual people.

428
00:39:25,249 --> 00:39:29,366
They talked about being on a path, having um

429
00:39:29,366 --> 00:39:32,058
a spiritual guru that they consulted with.

430
00:39:32,058 --> 00:39:37,392
I mean, they that was how they organized their life and their minds.

431
00:39:37,392 --> 00:39:39,193
But they just had this incredible life.

432
00:39:39,193 --> 00:39:47,538
And I mean, how you know, how wonderful the life is that to really do something you love
to have this very meditative long practice.

433
00:39:47,538 --> 00:39:48,709
They'd been all over the world.

434
00:39:48,709 --> 00:39:51,521
They seemed like they did well financially.

435
00:39:51,521 --> 00:39:56,495
They had really cool children who like still loved them and were part of the business.

436
00:39:56,495 --> 00:39:57,365
And it was awesome.

437
00:39:57,365 --> 00:39:58,936
um

438
00:39:58,936 --> 00:40:10,600
But they would say things like, know, when we started this, we were just in a parking lot
and, um you know, we lost one year, we'd had this woman working with us who was a master

439
00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:15,868
at Bonsai, you know, had studied under some masters and she left.

440
00:40:15,868 --> 00:40:17,779
And when she left, we thought, well, that's it.

441
00:40:17,779 --> 00:40:19,420
We're just going to close the door.

442
00:40:19,420 --> 00:40:28,056
And they said that day, a Japanese woman just happened to come to the shop who has had
also studied under a Bonsai master and

443
00:40:28,056 --> 00:40:31,147
then she worked for them for another 20 years.

444
00:40:31,147 --> 00:40:46,174
So um the thing of somebody, what you need actually walking through the door, when you
talk to people who um they just sort of believe with all their gut that what they're doing

445
00:40:46,174 --> 00:40:55,957
is what they want to be doing and that they are happy and that what they're doing is good,
that things like that just happen to them.

446
00:40:55,957 --> 00:40:57,512
um

447
00:40:57,512 --> 00:40:59,684
And it's really amazing.

448
00:40:59,684 --> 00:41:05,899
mean, it's just a, it's a cool phenomenon and I don't know, you know, what you want to
chalk that up to.

449
00:41:05,899 --> 00:41:15,807
And I think some of it is just for the individual to just change the way that they think
about things and think about people.

450
00:41:15,807 --> 00:41:23,723
And I think, especially in American culture, we're trained to be um very decisive and
especially in like business relations.

451
00:41:23,723 --> 00:41:27,214
You were kind of taught to go into things really slowly and

452
00:41:27,214 --> 00:41:29,647
deal with people at arm's length.

453
00:41:29,647 --> 00:41:38,254
So, I mean, just having the ability to kind of step back and think, like, why is this
person in my space?

454
00:41:38,254 --> 00:41:39,961
Why is this person talking to me?

455
00:41:39,961 --> 00:41:42,915
And what opportunities are here?

456
00:41:42,915 --> 00:41:45,478
How is this a good thing for both of us?

457
00:41:45,816 --> 00:42:00,782
Well, again, I think that that stuff happens when you have clarity about what your mission
and purpose in life is, then everything feeds it because then every person you meet in

458
00:42:00,782 --> 00:42:01,812
your life.

459
00:42:02,293 --> 00:42:07,475
But you're immediately, you have, you know, it's like you have a compass.

460
00:42:08,095 --> 00:42:15,956
And so everything that happens to you and every person you meet, every situation that you
confront,

461
00:42:15,956 --> 00:42:24,129
since you have this clarity about what your purpose in your life is, it's like, okay, is
this congruent with it?

462
00:42:24,129 --> 00:42:26,130
Can this help this?

463
00:42:26,130 --> 00:42:33,733
Is this just, you know, I enjoy it as entertainment, but it's not really connected with
where I'm going.

464
00:42:33,733 --> 00:42:36,955
Everything is in relation to something, you know?

465
00:42:36,955 --> 00:42:45,948
So I think, no, the path I'm on, really, the whole thing is about commitment.

466
00:42:46,196 --> 00:42:56,190
I think it's funny because I thought 20 years ago that I was really into commitment.

467
00:42:56,190 --> 00:43:00,832
then like it's 10 years later, I realized I'm actually much more committed.

468
00:43:00,832 --> 00:43:09,155
And then like a month ago, I thought, wow, you know, I live a really committed life, but I
think I'm actually more committed today than I was yesterday.

469
00:43:09,576 --> 00:43:14,118
And this thing just seems to just getting more more crystallized that.

470
00:43:14,118 --> 00:43:15,596
uh

471
00:43:15,596 --> 00:43:25,720
you know that you know people talk about you know dot putting you here for purpose you
know you usually that you know you say that and that but actually it's true i mean it's

472
00:43:25,720 --> 00:43:36,243
funny it's a corny statement that the the longer i'm on this planet the the clear that the
the the you know the people who've been saying that are onto something because you know

473
00:43:36,243 --> 00:43:38,508
it's not just in myself whenever

474
00:43:38,508 --> 00:43:39,919
I spend time with anybody.

475
00:43:39,919 --> 00:43:43,371
It's always like, you know, this person is just very special.

476
00:43:43,371 --> 00:43:47,324
They've got a special package here.

477
00:43:47,384 --> 00:43:58,412
And it's kind of like, if they would just accept the package they have and use it to serve
the world, they'd be absolutely in harmony and peace.

478
00:43:58,412 --> 00:44:07,468
And it's almost like all the difficulties they're experiencing in life is that the way
they're kind of living their life is somehow divorced from...

479
00:44:07,766 --> 00:44:10,567
who they really are and what they were meant to do.

480
00:44:10,567 --> 00:44:15,598
And they don't want to accept m the gift that they have.

481
00:44:15,598 --> 00:44:18,549
And they're trying to be somebody other than themselves.

482
00:44:19,089 --> 00:44:29,612
And it takes, I think it's a great gift to kind of just get it and just acknowledge that
this is my gift and I'm going to use it to serve.

483
00:44:29,612 --> 00:44:35,974
Like the Banzai people, they're serving through the Banzai and that's it.

484
00:44:36,024 --> 00:44:39,884
They get all the happiness through that, you know, and they're perfectly content.

485
00:44:39,884 --> 00:44:48,340
Yeah, I mean, yeah, it gives them a I think it's in some ways if you if we use them as an
example, blowing up the bonsai people.

486
00:44:48,340 --> 00:44:51,302
um

487
00:44:51,458 --> 00:44:52,798
up the Banzai people.

488
00:44:52,798 --> 00:44:57,344
That sounds like a great mini-series.

489
00:44:57,344 --> 00:45:00,876
Yeah, know, a reality show.

490
00:45:01,297 --> 00:45:03,718
No fighting, most boring reality show ever.

491
00:45:03,718 --> 00:45:16,147
um But yeah, I mean, I really like the metaphor of like a shopkeeper or, know, I guess
that's the capitalist in me.

492
00:45:16,147 --> 00:45:25,964
But they, you know, I think that it's nice because it grounds you in the reality of, you
know, if the market is life.

493
00:45:25,964 --> 00:45:31,619
it gives you a place to be and it gives you something to do and something very concrete.

494
00:45:31,619 --> 00:45:44,981
I mean, like in my experience working retail, working retail actually, like I hate to say
it because I bitched and moaned a lot when I worked in retail also, but um the one thing I

495
00:45:44,981 --> 00:45:47,733
loved was interacting with customers.

496
00:45:47,733 --> 00:45:49,765
um I fucking loved it.

497
00:45:49,765 --> 00:45:51,196
I loved working register.

498
00:45:51,196 --> 00:45:53,558
I loved being able to

499
00:45:53,748 --> 00:45:57,339
see like 200 people in a day make eye contact with them.

500
00:45:57,339 --> 00:46:06,352
Even if, I mean, a lot of people, you know, didn't say anything to you, but occasionally,
actually not even occasionally, about half of the people were totally pleasant and

501
00:46:06,352 --> 00:46:06,822
awesome.

502
00:46:06,822 --> 00:46:12,283
And I had some really nice exchanges with people and it was nice, it was just nice to do
that.

503
00:46:12,283 --> 00:46:21,406
So it was like, even though I was, you know, bagging groceries, um what I was really doing
was what I love to do, which is.

504
00:46:21,590 --> 00:46:28,435
just talking to people and helping people out and answering questions and just doing the
best that I could.

505
00:46:28,536 --> 00:46:34,161
And I guess what I'm trying to say is it was nice because it put me in front of people and
I could have been doing anything.

506
00:46:34,161 --> 00:46:38,745
I could have been shoe shining or waitressing or whatever.

507
00:46:38,745 --> 00:46:49,646
um But I think, yeah, maybe that's what you're saying is that your purpose, it gives you
something to do with your hands oh and then you kind of figure the rest out from there.

508
00:46:49,646 --> 00:46:57,613
Yeah, it gives you, well, engage, I think you're engaged to the level of your commitment
to whatever you're doing.

509
00:46:57,652 --> 00:47:06,841
And then the other piece of it, which I think is related at some point in time, is like
you were talking about, you know, work in retail, you know?

510
00:47:07,182 --> 00:47:11,646
And to me, you know, it's like as I'm getting older, it's kind of like dawning on me.

511
00:47:11,646 --> 00:47:16,320
I think I'm seeing things now I didn't quite see even five years ago.

512
00:47:16,346 --> 00:47:26,835
And it's almost like it's over simplification maybe, but I almost see that there's two
large groups of people, okay?

513
00:47:26,835 --> 00:47:35,121
And this is some overlap, of course, but the orientation is there's people who their
orientation is, what can I do for you?

514
00:47:35,922 --> 00:47:38,444
How can I be a service to you?

515
00:47:38,444 --> 00:47:39,985
How can I help you?

516
00:47:40,626 --> 00:47:44,489
And then there's, this other thing is what can you do for me?

517
00:47:45,550 --> 00:47:47,150
What's in it for me?

518
00:47:47,230 --> 00:47:56,990
And it really seems to me is that the people who have a basic orientation is how can I be
of help to you?

519
00:47:56,990 --> 00:47:59,430
How can I make your life better?

520
00:47:59,430 --> 00:48:02,129
People have that orientation just a lighter.

521
00:48:02,810 --> 00:48:06,010
And the people who, it's like, what's in it for me?

522
00:48:06,010 --> 00:48:10,890
They're like, they're all tangled up with themselves, tripping over themselves.

523
00:48:10,890 --> 00:48:15,000
And it's a more liberating life to...

524
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:20,532
you know, be content with yourself and just see ways in which you can help others.

525
00:48:20,532 --> 00:48:22,752
It's just another orientation.

526
00:48:23,553 --> 00:48:25,033
it's a lighter orientation.

527
00:48:25,033 --> 00:48:32,295
think that's really, you people are spending thousands of dollars, you know, I can see it.

528
00:48:32,295 --> 00:48:42,978
They go to all these psychologists, they're to, they're all confused, they're all tangled
up with themselves, they're frustrated, you know, but actually,

529
00:48:43,106 --> 00:48:45,787
In a lot of cases, they just got to get over themselves.

530
00:48:46,228 --> 00:48:53,243
lot of their problems is that they're just too wrapped up in themselves and they can't get
out.

531
00:48:53,243 --> 00:48:55,154
It's like they're an elaborate.

532
00:48:55,494 --> 00:49:01,338
They're so wrapped up in themselves that they're prisoners of themselves.

533
00:49:01,486 --> 00:49:13,434
I think that's interesting though because I also really believe in that sentiment of
taking care of yourself or meeting your needs first in a way.

534
00:49:13,434 --> 00:49:26,686
I I really feel like the reason people start tripping over themselves with selfishness is
because they're so depleted and they feel so wronged.

535
00:49:26,686 --> 00:49:31,160
I mean, maybe I'm sure there are religious parables about

536
00:49:31,160 --> 00:49:38,970
people who were overly generous or overly naive who got screwed and then become hateful.

537
00:49:38,970 --> 00:49:40,894
I mean, they become like golem.

538
00:49:40,894 --> 00:49:49,541
Well, I totally, I totally agree with you, but I see this more as being developmental.

539
00:49:49,541 --> 00:49:50,182
Okay.

540
00:49:50,182 --> 00:49:53,214
Like for instance, yesterday, I totally agree with you.

541
00:49:53,214 --> 00:49:54,825
I'll give you an example.

542
00:49:55,506 --> 00:50:01,591
And I was like, when I was saying a person being like wrapped up in themselves versus
being of service.

543
00:50:01,591 --> 00:50:02,061
Okay.

544
00:50:02,061 --> 00:50:10,380
I'm talking that more as being a, it's not an end game, kind of just the normal state of
being for person.

545
00:50:10,380 --> 00:50:17,915
But as you said, and it is true, this is a developmental thing that would get you to where
you could be this way.

546
00:50:18,196 --> 00:50:19,326
it was really interesting.

547
00:50:19,326 --> 00:50:21,798
I had a consultation yesterday, right?

548
00:50:21,798 --> 00:50:24,760
And it is very common.

549
00:50:24,800 --> 00:50:32,646
this woman was, uh she was in a relationship and she was very...

550
00:50:32,646 --> 00:50:33,606
uh

551
00:50:36,837 --> 00:50:44,658
She was kind of like blowing it up, but a lot of it was because she was so scared.

552
00:50:44,658 --> 00:50:49,898
The people are so scared it's not going to work out, they try to find a way to explode it,
right?

553
00:50:49,898 --> 00:50:54,558
It's kind of crazy, but they kind of undermine themselves.

554
00:50:54,558 --> 00:51:00,238
But at the end of the day, it's clear that this is a very common situation.

555
00:51:00,238 --> 00:51:03,618
This woman felt...

556
00:51:03,916 --> 00:51:05,356
did not think much of herself.

557
00:51:05,356 --> 00:51:10,248
Okay, and she did not have a high opinion of herself.

558
00:51:10,248 --> 00:51:14,189
And she was with a guy who she thought was much better than her.

559
00:51:14,369 --> 00:51:27,032
Okay, and she was afraid that one day because he was so much more developed than her, that
he would eventually drop her and this was causing her much anxiety.

560
00:51:28,133 --> 00:51:32,454
but really the problem obviously was is that people who

561
00:51:32,492 --> 00:51:37,854
I mean, people develop differently, but when any couple starts out together, they're
always at the same level of development.

562
00:51:37,854 --> 00:51:41,005
It has to be that way, because otherwise they wouldn't be together.

563
00:51:41,005 --> 00:51:43,975
A very developed person is not with an undeveloped person.

564
00:51:43,975 --> 00:51:46,866
That's not that the mathematics aren't there.

565
00:51:46,866 --> 00:51:47,577
You know what saying?

566
00:51:47,577 --> 00:51:50,677
If they were so developed, they wouldn't be with somebody who's undeveloped.

567
00:51:50,677 --> 00:51:52,828
They're not as developed as they thought they were.

568
00:51:52,828 --> 00:51:59,570
So, you know, but she's thinking she's less developed when, to begin with, she's obviously
not less developed.

569
00:51:59,814 --> 00:52:12,530
And, but more importantly, it became clear that she was kind of socialized, okay, her
whole life, thinking that she needed somebody else to fill her, that she was empty and

570
00:52:12,530 --> 00:52:13,641
inadequate.

571
00:52:13,641 --> 00:52:19,724
And so like many people, she's desperately looking for another person to fill her, right?

572
00:52:19,724 --> 00:52:21,925
Bad strategy, okay?

573
00:52:21,925 --> 00:52:24,084
Because actually,

574
00:52:24,084 --> 00:52:35,654
She is under the, because she's not that developed yet, very good person, but not that
developed yet, she, her whole life is being run under the like very, very bad strategy

575
00:52:35,654 --> 00:52:44,511
that somehow I'm going to be able to fill myself by yanking in another person in my life
who actually wants to be with me.

576
00:52:44,511 --> 00:52:48,994
That strategy obviously is not a very good strategy, never works.

577
00:52:49,055 --> 00:52:53,408
And the thing that she has never done though, and she's almost 30 years old,

578
00:52:53,408 --> 00:53:07,746
is she has never actually spent the time to develop a relationship with herself, to
actually like her own person, actually take, like you said, she's never really taken care

579
00:53:07,746 --> 00:53:11,728
of and given props to her own being.

580
00:53:11,728 --> 00:53:14,990
So she's like really a stranger to herself.

581
00:53:14,990 --> 00:53:19,913
She really doesn't appreciate how wonderful she is or the great qualities she has.

582
00:53:19,913 --> 00:53:22,914
She doesn't like spending time with her own self.

583
00:53:22,990 --> 00:53:32,890
and she feels empty, so she's desperately looking for another person to validate she
exists, but she still hasn't had a relationship with herself.

584
00:53:32,890 --> 00:53:43,070
I told her, you know, we were talking and I told her, in my opinion, the best thing for
her to do is to actually cool the, it was like counterintuitive.

585
00:53:43,070 --> 00:53:48,952
told her, I thought for a while to cool the relationship down without necessarily walking
away from it.

586
00:53:48,952 --> 00:53:54,944
but actually spending the next three or four years developing herself and enjoying her own
time.

587
00:53:54,944 --> 00:54:04,608
And I said, you know, but she said, well, like you said, she goes, well, I've always heard
that from the spiritual teachers that you should be selfless.

588
00:54:04,768 --> 00:54:10,831
And like what you said, I said, you're not gonna have the ability to be selfless until you
have something to give.

589
00:54:11,231 --> 00:54:18,926
Okay, so you, what I would like you to do for the next three, four years is to be as
selfish as you can be.

590
00:54:18,926 --> 00:54:21,946
You have permission be be a selfish.

591
00:54:21,946 --> 00:54:23,926
This is what I was saying It's a developmental thing.

592
00:54:23,926 --> 00:54:36,386
It says look first be selfish not to where you like hurting people but just for the next
three four years just Pay attention to yourself and feed yourself and do what's right for

593
00:54:36,386 --> 00:54:48,086
you without hurting other people and and and just think about you should just think about
yourself for a while until You're very happy with the person who you are

594
00:54:48,086 --> 00:54:59,481
And then at that point, you know, you can share that and then you can be, you can be more
serviceful and self selfless, but now you don't actually have enough to actually give

595
00:54:59,481 --> 00:55:00,511
right now.

596
00:55:01,051 --> 00:55:04,112
So I don't know if that's a validation to what you said.

597
00:55:04,453 --> 00:55:05,773
It's it's developed.

598
00:55:05,773 --> 00:55:06,303
Yeah, it is.

599
00:55:06,303 --> 00:55:09,995
But I think that to me it's, it's kind of developmental.

600
00:55:09,995 --> 00:55:15,037
I don't think that that's healthy for people to do all the time their whole life.

601
00:55:15,037 --> 00:55:18,028
I think that it's, but I think it's a step.

602
00:55:18,028 --> 00:55:23,973
that you have to, you know, it's like a child kind of separating from their parents.

603
00:55:23,973 --> 00:55:28,166
You you have to kind of go through a rebellious stage.

604
00:55:28,166 --> 00:55:30,338
It's like human development.

605
00:55:30,338 --> 00:55:38,734
There's a point where you actually have to develop your ego in a healthy way, that you
have to have a very clear sense of who you are.

606
00:55:39,015 --> 00:55:43,238
You have to enjoy being you, and you have to be willing.

607
00:55:43,402 --> 00:55:55,529
yourself and to enjoy yourself and to care about yourself and once you're able to do that
then you don't need anything from anybody and you're stopping looking around for that and

608
00:55:55,529 --> 00:56:03,334
then you can actually start uh dedicating your life to what your life's purpose is and
serving humanity.

609
00:56:03,334 --> 00:56:11,348
So I agree with you but I see it in terms of being a particular stage of development not
something that you need to do forever.

610
00:56:11,414 --> 00:56:12,414
Right.

611
00:56:12,495 --> 00:56:24,972
Yeah, I think, well, I mean, that's part of the goal too, is that you can get to a point
of equilibrium so that, you know, being out in the world and serving others doesn't

612
00:56:24,972 --> 00:56:25,883
deplete you.

613
00:56:25,883 --> 00:56:30,966
You know, I mean, you start to feel that altruism goes both ways.

614
00:56:31,886 --> 00:56:43,726
Yeah, well, the thing that a lot of people miss is that, you know, I see a lot of people
who are just kind of like almost desperate trying to help everybody they can.

615
00:56:44,746 --> 00:56:52,146
But they like you saying they they almost forget that they're a person also.

616
00:56:52,326 --> 00:56:53,266
And they do.

617
00:56:53,266 --> 00:56:54,366
You can see how they are.

618
00:56:54,366 --> 00:56:59,506
It's like they they they're like they're like and I don't want to be like that either.

619
00:56:59,506 --> 00:57:01,388
But, know, these service junkies.

620
00:57:01,388 --> 00:57:09,131
you know, but some of them actually don't take care of themselves and in a way that's
disrespectful too.

621
00:57:09,206 --> 00:57:11,946
Right, and it's just, it's destructive.

622
00:57:11,946 --> 00:57:19,582
I mean, I think that that over time will have its consequences of not taking care of
yourself.

623
00:57:19,582 --> 00:57:34,190
I mean, when I forget his name, I'm gonna try Googling it while I talk, but my mom used to
tell a story about a doctor in South Africa who had like always a line, like I think he

624
00:57:34,190 --> 00:57:36,521
had a free clinic, just totally open to anybody.

625
00:57:36,521 --> 00:57:39,022
He always had a line out the door.

626
00:57:39,230 --> 00:57:43,852
and he'd work from nine to five and then at five.

627
00:57:43,852 --> 00:57:45,292
Albert Schweitzer?

628
00:57:46,070 --> 00:57:47,804
I think, yeah.

629
00:57:47,804 --> 00:57:50,675
Anyway, and he would, yes, that's who it is.

630
00:57:52,190 --> 00:57:53,396
I think so.

631
00:57:53,396 --> 00:58:05,491
Anyway, he would, every day at five, he would shut the door and there would always be lots
of people who got shut out for the day and they'd have to wait until tomorrow.

632
00:58:05,491 --> 00:58:07,278
And I think some of them, you know.

633
00:58:07,278 --> 00:58:10,238
probably died, probably got a lot worse overnight.

634
00:58:10,258 --> 00:58:13,858
And somebody asked him once, how can you do that?

635
00:58:13,858 --> 00:58:16,418
How do you have the stomach to do that?

636
00:58:16,418 --> 00:58:19,478
Because you're obviously a caring person.

637
00:58:19,858 --> 00:58:24,718
And he said, I need to do that so that I can come back tomorrow.

638
00:58:24,718 --> 00:58:25,998
I need to shut the door.

639
00:58:25,998 --> 00:58:27,798
I need to have my dinner.

640
00:58:27,798 --> 00:58:29,162
I need to read the paper.

641
00:58:29,162 --> 00:58:30,422
Hey, thank you.

642
00:58:30,422 --> 00:58:31,360
You know what?

643
00:58:31,360 --> 00:58:32,464
By the way, thank you.

644
00:58:32,464 --> 00:58:33,867
I need to hear that.

645
00:58:34,088 --> 00:58:35,390
Yeah, I'm sure you do.

646
00:58:35,390 --> 00:58:36,738
I'm sure that you do.

647
00:58:36,738 --> 00:58:37,018
you.

648
00:58:37,018 --> 00:58:38,638
think that's why we're talking today.

649
00:58:38,638 --> 00:58:42,658
actually think, because you said that, I almost started crying.

650
00:58:43,458 --> 00:58:49,938
Because sometimes I lose track of that and I'm not going to be able to help anybody.

651
00:58:49,938 --> 00:58:51,358
I need to learn that myself.

652
00:58:51,358 --> 00:58:52,518
So thank you.

653
00:58:52,760 --> 00:58:53,575
Sure.

654
00:58:54,126 --> 00:58:55,106
You know.

655
00:58:56,108 --> 00:58:57,450
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

656
00:58:57,450 --> 00:58:59,072
I guess I got what I needed today.

657
00:58:59,072 --> 00:58:59,332
Yeah.

658
00:58:59,332 --> 00:59:00,199
Thanks for the say.

659
00:59:00,199 --> 00:59:01,514
How much do I owe you?

660
00:59:03,546 --> 00:59:12,848
Sometimes that's been my own personal challenge at times is knowing how to say no.

661
00:59:13,169 --> 00:59:26,952
It's hard because uh I just see people suffering and if I'm in a position where they're
asking for my help, I just really don't know how to say no.

662
00:59:28,353 --> 00:59:30,273
And it has affected my health.

663
00:59:32,526 --> 00:59:40,146
That's good, I'm going to meditate on that and nobody can say that Albert Schweitzer
didn't serve the humanity.

664
00:59:41,546 --> 00:59:43,046
yeah, that's interesting.

665
00:59:43,046 --> 00:59:48,086
It's funny that you say it because I know we're later in the week we're going to go to
Cali.

666
00:59:48,466 --> 00:59:53,766
I think I got to give somebody a course for some corporation or something Saturday
morning.

667
00:59:53,766 --> 01:00:01,306
Then we're going to fly to Cali and I'm not going to have a class that night so we're
going to go out salsa dancing.

668
01:00:01,526 --> 01:00:02,793
wonderful.

669
01:00:03,094 --> 01:00:06,176
in the capital of salsa, in Marengue.

670
01:00:06,776 --> 01:00:09,468
Really, I'm really looking forward to that.

671
01:00:09,468 --> 01:00:15,761
everybody says like, this is like incendiary, the salsa here.

672
01:00:15,761 --> 01:00:19,083
So I'm really looking forward to that too.

673
01:00:19,543 --> 01:00:22,245
It'll be hot there too, it's at a lower elevation.

674
01:00:22,245 --> 01:00:24,846
And it's a very different culture, it's really interesting.

675
01:00:24,846 --> 01:00:32,460
Like Bogota and Cali are like, and there's like three really main cities in Colombia,
there's uh Bogota.

676
01:00:32,610 --> 01:00:34,211
which is kind of like New York.

677
01:00:34,211 --> 01:00:36,482
mean, it's like everybody's chasing the big buck.

678
01:00:36,482 --> 01:00:42,436
know, it's, Bokeh does very, everybody's, everybody's running, know, running, running,
running, everybody, it's hell.

679
01:00:42,436 --> 01:00:46,439
And everybody is really measured by how much money they have.

680
01:00:46,439 --> 01:00:56,785
It's very, very materialistic, capitalistic, uh you know, so that's the kind of the way
the city, that's how that is.

681
01:00:56,785 --> 01:00:58,346
And then Kali.

682
01:00:58,862 --> 01:01:12,042
is a lot of people live there too, and they've got a lot of the good and bad things going
on in Colombia, but it's a lot slower, and the people, you know, they measure their

683
01:01:12,042 --> 01:01:13,962
success differently there.

684
01:01:14,242 --> 01:01:15,562
I can really see it.

685
01:01:15,562 --> 01:01:23,502
You see people measure their success by more about their social connections and the
quality of their life.

686
01:01:23,662 --> 01:01:26,062
And it's a lot slower.

687
01:01:26,242 --> 01:01:28,142
It's a lot, I mean, just the whole pace.

688
01:01:28,142 --> 01:01:33,522
is slow and the people are just more, you know, that's, know, and the music is different
there.

689
01:01:33,522 --> 01:01:34,122
It's really interesting.

690
01:01:34,122 --> 01:01:35,142
The music is different there.

691
01:01:35,142 --> 01:01:36,722
The attitude is different there.

692
01:01:36,722 --> 01:01:43,042
And then, you know, you go to Medellin, which is really, ah, you got to go there sometime.

693
01:01:43,042 --> 01:01:49,762
That actually, I'd say that's probably one of the five most beautiful cities I've ever
seen in my life.

694
01:01:50,522 --> 01:01:53,322
Not so much the buildings, but the setting is unbelievable.

695
01:01:53,322 --> 01:01:56,438
They call it the city of eternal spring.

696
01:01:56,438 --> 01:01:57,562
What is it?

697
01:01:57,742 --> 01:02:00,382
The city of eternal spring.

698
01:02:00,662 --> 01:02:03,902
Because it's like spring there 12 months a year.

699
01:02:04,082 --> 01:02:05,602
No, it's like it is.

700
01:02:05,942 --> 01:02:08,562
Things are blooming all year.

701
01:02:08,662 --> 01:02:11,482
It's never hot and it's never cold.

702
01:02:11,622 --> 01:02:18,342
It's always like, you know, is like 75, 80 all the time.

703
01:02:19,382 --> 01:02:20,182
It is.

704
01:02:20,182 --> 01:02:21,322
It's like it is.

705
01:02:21,322 --> 01:02:26,734
It's the weather there is amazing and so.

706
01:02:26,734 --> 01:02:29,294
The people have their own culture there again.

707
01:02:29,294 --> 01:02:30,874
It's a whole other thing.

708
01:02:30,954 --> 01:02:37,794
So it's many countries in one here, but I love it here.

709
01:02:37,794 --> 01:02:40,114
I hope you come here sometime.

710
01:02:41,414 --> 01:02:47,514
And it's good to see that, you know, it's really, it's very, very interesting.

711
01:02:47,514 --> 01:02:53,074
You know, they've got all this stuff, it's a small country and they got all this stuff
going on.

712
01:02:53,134 --> 01:02:53,774
And

713
01:02:53,774 --> 01:02:57,334
The people actually, it's really interesting.

714
01:02:57,514 --> 01:03:08,494
The people, I don't know that I've been in another country like this where the people
actually, they love and hate their country so much at the same time.

715
01:03:09,142 --> 01:03:11,014
I feel like that's kind of page-

716
01:03:11,014 --> 01:03:11,994
States.

717
01:03:12,074 --> 01:03:19,134
Yeah, yeah, it's a little like that in the United States sometimes, but there's like this
love-hate thing.

718
01:03:19,134 --> 01:03:24,674
But it's kind of like the people I think here love their...

719
01:03:24,674 --> 01:03:32,934
You know, they love a lot of stuff about the culture and, you know, like the food and the
people and this.

720
01:03:32,934 --> 01:03:36,514
And I think there's more sense of country here.

721
01:03:36,522 --> 01:03:42,624
of any place I've been to in South America except perhaps Argentina.

722
01:03:42,984 --> 01:03:54,267
And the people have a real sense of being Colombian, you know, to the, not just Latin
Americans, not just South Americans, this real sense of being a Colombian.

723
01:03:54,267 --> 01:04:05,770
But then along with it is this whole, you know, this whole, all this baggage where, you
know, people really talk about this sense of shame that

724
01:04:06,306 --> 01:04:08,727
There is, it's so corrupt here.

725
01:04:09,467 --> 01:04:13,509
The politics are corrupt, the police are corrupt, the drug lords are corrupt.

726
01:04:13,509 --> 01:04:28,995
Every, know, there's so much corruption here and there's so much violence here that, and
then the people who do have money seemingly are numb to it and all they care about is, you

727
01:04:28,995 --> 01:04:30,996
know, if they have their new car.

728
01:04:30,996 --> 01:04:36,130
So there's this prevalent sense of cynicism that

729
01:04:36,130 --> 01:04:39,432
that life sucks, you know what saying?

730
01:04:39,493 --> 01:04:47,239
Like, it sucks and this is how the world is and I have to sell out my integrity to just
survive.

731
01:04:47,239 --> 01:04:51,362
And that's how the world is and there's no sense in fighting it.

732
01:04:51,362 --> 01:04:55,605
And I know everything is corrupt, but that's life.

733
01:04:55,926 --> 01:05:06,122
And so there's this cynicism that's kinda, and then people on some level know that that's
really not what life is about.

734
01:05:06,122 --> 01:05:09,983
And so there's this guilt about it.

735
01:05:10,584 --> 01:05:23,899
you know, the people have prided their Colombians, but on the other hand, they know that
the country has really kind of birthed tremendous amount of violence and the whole drug

736
01:05:23,899 --> 01:05:24,570
trade.

737
01:05:24,570 --> 01:05:26,921
People know that people's lives are destroyed.

738
01:05:26,921 --> 01:05:28,851
mean, people aren't stupid.

739
01:05:28,972 --> 01:05:35,194
And they realize that, you know, this has been a source of destroying people's lives.

740
01:05:35,276 --> 01:05:43,462
that ah it's so much of the power in the society is being driven by drugs and corruption
and things like this.

741
01:05:43,462 --> 01:05:48,075
And some people have a lot of shame about this as well.

742
01:05:48,075 --> 01:05:48,986
it's very odd.

743
01:05:48,986 --> 01:05:52,038
There's no country quite like this.

744
01:05:52,038 --> 01:05:55,760
It's an incredibly beautiful country, scenically as well.

745
01:05:56,982 --> 01:05:58,883
being here is interesting.

746
01:05:58,983 --> 01:06:00,014
That's why I like to travel.

747
01:06:00,014 --> 01:06:03,346
It's just very different here, very different.

748
01:06:04,793 --> 01:06:05,876
you

749
01:06:08,652 --> 01:06:12,304
The music you're listening to is by Auntie Depressant.

750
01:06:12,304 --> 01:06:14,625
Hari Nam wants to hear from you.

751
01:06:14,625 --> 01:06:21,888
Email him at harinam56 at gmail.com and find him at yogaheaven.com.

752
01:06:22,629 --> 01:06:28,432
Subscribe to Warrior Saint on iTunes and be sure to rate and review us while you're there.

753
01:06:28,432 --> 01:06:32,233
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