Speaker 1: Hey, welcome back to Beard. Listen dickless me.
Speaker 2: Oh that makes someone want to listen.
Speaker 1: I'm Kevin Smith.
Speaker 2: And I'm Harley Quinn Smith.
Speaker 1: I was on The Talk this week or last week
Speaker 1: two days ago, I know, and I the kid I
Speaker 1: put up on my in my story like this little
Speaker 1: clip from the show, and the kid thought it was hysterical.
Speaker 1: So this morning, at like six in the morning, I
Speaker 1: texted to her, so here was the clip I saw.
Speaker 1: I don't know if you've ever seen the Talk. There
Speaker 1: was a very version of it years ago that had
Speaker 1: like Julie Chen and Sarah Gilbert were hosts and stuff.
Speaker 1: But for years now it's been like Jerry O'Connell and
Speaker 1: these other kids and whatnot. So I've been on the
Speaker 1: show before. I was there, I think for Clerks three,
Speaker 1: and then I came back to do some four thirty
Speaker 1: movie press and it's like they're ending. The show's going
Speaker 1: off the air for real, Yeah, which is like in
Speaker 1: terms of places to do a national spot, you know,
Speaker 1: in terms of publicity and whatnot. Like now it's well,
Speaker 1: let's see Fallent, No, Jimmy Kimmel's out here, Access Hollywood.
Speaker 2: And where's good Morning America.
Speaker 1: New York. Mostly everything's New York and so the Talk
Speaker 1: going away is like one more like the business getting smaller.
Speaker 1: And so when they were like, hey, do you want
Speaker 1: to go on the talk? I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: You're not gonna get to ask me that next year,
Speaker 1: So fuck yeah, I want to go on the talk.
Speaker 1: And it's close. It's also it's at CBS Radford, which
Speaker 1: is where we shot Jane Slibov shuk back, so like,
Speaker 1: you know, I'll always fucking roll up on there. And
Speaker 1: uh so I went on the show and it's like
Speaker 1: a daytime talk show kind of affair and whatnot, and
Speaker 1: the audience is very like whoa. It's one of those
Speaker 1: things like you know, I saw Clep of Jerry O'Connell.
Speaker 1: He's talking about somebody was the guest. Some lady was
Speaker 1: a guest and he's married to Rebecca Romaine and he
Speaker 1: was like looking at the camera, he's like did you
Speaker 1: hear that? That's what you got to do as my wife,
Speaker 1: and like whoa. And they played music very like Ellen
Speaker 1: DeGeneres and it kind of sounds so I'm I go
Speaker 1: out and I get a bigger welcome than I would
Speaker 1: have assumed in a place. You know, that's like cater's
Speaker 1: mostly to an audience that I don't really talk to,
Speaker 1: and I always default for shows like that to Momily,
Speaker 1: to my mom. Really, so I opened with some fucking
Speaker 1: Mammily material. I was like, Oh, my mom loves the.
Speaker 3: Show kids, and so wait, go back, what do you mean,
Speaker 3: like what she.
Speaker 1: Watched the shows? She's like, oh my kids, like she
Speaker 1: calls you know, like my stories. If she was watching
Speaker 1: the soap opera. That show's got five people on it,
Speaker 1: so they're all kids to call them, they're all mamily's
Speaker 1: children children, which you know, what about those of us
Speaker 1: who are fucking by blood Momily? And Momily is just
Speaker 1: like watersticking and blood bitch, I told you that story, right,
Speaker 1: I don't know, my god, it's like one of the
Speaker 1: If I hadn't made Clerks, this would be the biggest
Speaker 1: thing that ever happened in my life. So we're at
Speaker 1: Christmas and a Christmas nineteen seventy seven, seventy eight. I'm
Speaker 1: a youngster still, I'm either seventy or eight years old,
Speaker 1: and let's say seventy eight, seventy nine. So my uncle Wayne,
Speaker 1: my father's brother, they're still alive to this day. He
Speaker 1: is the single man young my father's youngest brother, and
Speaker 1: so you know, he's like he was a little like playboy,
Speaker 1: always had like different girlfriend and stuff like that. Okay,
Speaker 1: so we'd had Christmas, you know, we went over to
Speaker 1: Grandmamaly's and probably went up to like and Virginias and
Speaker 1: then came home. And so it was Christmas Day evening,
Speaker 1: not Christmas Eve, but the night of Christmas, and we're
Speaker 1: all in our pajamas and watching like TV and Mom's
Speaker 1: giving us like TV dinners whatever the fuck, and the
Speaker 1: phone ring and my uncle Wayne calls and my dad
Speaker 1: talks to my dad like never answers the phone. And
Speaker 1: then when my dad gets off the phone, he says
Speaker 1: to my mom, oh, Wayne's gonna come by. Who's a girlfriend?
Speaker 1: You know? For me as a kid, I was a
Speaker 1: great presence, true, one more fucking relative, and we're gonna
Speaker 1: get some fucking gifts.
Speaker 2: So true.
Speaker 1: My mom was like no. MoMA was like no, he's
Speaker 1: not coming over. We're done. And Dad's like, well, I mean,
Speaker 1: but he's on his way. I was like, I don't care,
Speaker 1: Christmas is over, like just like calling, he's fucking don
Speaker 1: I'm preparing for this day for like three months. We
Speaker 1: hit the fucking we rang the bell, that's it. And
Speaker 1: so she was like, no, you would call him back
Speaker 1: and tell him no, and he's like my dad again
Speaker 1: nineteen seventy eight, seventy nine, maybe eighty, andes like, how
Speaker 1: am I supposed to call him back? He's on his
Speaker 1: way here. We had no cell phones, so it escalated
Speaker 1: very very quickly, with mom thrown out examples of like
Speaker 1: why my father shouldn't be welcoming Uncle Wayne on Christmas night,
Speaker 1: like well he did that thing to you one time,
Speaker 1: like this old ass thing that happened like decades before.
Speaker 2: Did Grandma not like him or just wasn't wasn't trying to?
Speaker 1: She want having company and Christmas was over, Like I'm
Speaker 1: not disrupting my evening for you know, fucking anybody, let
Speaker 1: alone fucking Wayne. Like time to visit was like visiting
Speaker 1: hours and now the kids are SETTLM.
Speaker 2: Momily said in a boundary bro.
Speaker 1: Bro nothing healthier than that.
Speaker 2: So she no, she's not.
Speaker 1: Awkward from my dad because he was like that's my
Speaker 1: brother and like he wants to come over and like
Speaker 1: I would like to see him on.
Speaker 2: Christmas, Mommy's like, no, no, can't do.
Speaker 1: Mommy put up a boundary. But let's be honest, Mommiy
Speaker 1: and Popoley two of the most codependant motherfuckers you ever
Speaker 1: met your life, and then they passed it down to
Speaker 1: their kids as well. I wish she'd passed down the
Speaker 1: fucking boundaries to me and stuff. I have a fundamental
Speaker 1: inability to say no, Like in that situation, I'd be like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: of course, come and bring everybody like, you know, just
Speaker 1: open up the house and shit like that. But Momily
Speaker 1: wasn't that person stilling, So she was like no, And
Speaker 1: my dad foolishly uttered an expression that I don't know,
Speaker 1: maybe i'd heard it prior to that, but when he
Speaker 1: said it, oh fucking Momily popped the fuck off, bro.
Speaker 1: It was it was. It was crazy. So my father
Speaker 1: goes talking about you know, his brother, talking about Uncle Wayne.
Speaker 1: He says to my mother, blood is thicker than water. Brace.
Speaker 1: Now what does that mean to you? What was the
Speaker 1: implication with that statement that, well, I.
Speaker 2: Don't know about the water. I mean I've heard that,
Speaker 2: I've heard the saying before, I don't know about the
Speaker 2: water part.
Speaker 1: Now the dress, what does it mean you do what did?
Speaker 1: Is it bad?
Speaker 2: I'm trying to analyze. I don't know what the water
Speaker 2: farm means, but like, relatives come first.
Speaker 1: No, okay, well then break it down. Blood would be
Speaker 1: what the relatives? So what's the water he shares with
Speaker 1: my uncle Wayne? Blood? Does he share with my.
Speaker 2: Mother the child?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yes, oh yeah, I'm discounting that, but that was
Speaker 1: his He was saying blood meaning my fucker was thicker
Speaker 1: than water, meaning like I'm married you, this is.
Speaker 2: My Yeah, yeah, I hear that.
Speaker 1: And mamally was like who your Like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: she went Linda Blair so fucking fast. Now she didn't
Speaker 1: fucking scream or yell or fucking pitch a fit. Her
Speaker 1: face went nuclear. You could tell she was and she
Speaker 1: did the fucking shape thing. She's storing him out of
Speaker 1: the fucking room. And mind you, our house was tiny
Speaker 1: twenty one Jackson's Street, like literally most of the house
Speaker 1: fits in this room RT. So Mom only goes around
Speaker 1: the fucking corner and all of a sudden we hear
Speaker 1: and that I didn't even do an it justice, So
Speaker 1: you know, Dad was in the kitchen. He stormed to
Speaker 1: the other side of the house. Mom went to Oh
Speaker 1: my god.
Speaker 2: I was like, that wasn't too pop.
Speaker 1: For the children. She's like, you little bit your mindh
Speaker 1: my god. She she he wanted a kitchen. She went
Speaker 1: towards the bedroom, but there was a big bank. It's
Speaker 1: Virginia and Donald, my brother and sister. They are four
Speaker 1: and five years older than me. They're like, because the
Speaker 1: presumably I won't get in trouble some of the smallest
Speaker 1: of and I go, look and right outside of my
Speaker 1: bedroom me and Don share a bedroom. Right outside of
Speaker 1: the bedroom, fucking through the wall. Mamaly came in, threw
Speaker 1: a right fucking hook into the wall, right over the
Speaker 1: light switch in the hallway, and you know, you know
Speaker 1: what was it made of? Like was that ship dry
Speaker 1: wall or whatever? Fucking with a layer of paint some wallboard.
Speaker 1: Bang stayed there for ten to fifteen years. They never
Speaker 1: fixed it, really.
Speaker 2: As a reminder, don't you ever fucking say that.
Speaker 1: I do feel that they had some conversation. He was like, well,
Speaker 1: now that that's over, I guess I should fix the wall,
Speaker 1: and she's like, don't touch that wall. You could see
Speaker 1: that wall every day. We'll remind you. Water is thicker
Speaker 1: than blood. Motherfucker. By the grace of grace. Oh my
Speaker 1: god father, such a pussy whip. He was like, I
Speaker 1: just fucking I want to taste of grace. Let he
Speaker 1: let her fucking Let it sit there.
Speaker 2: That powerful right there.
Speaker 1: Blood is thicker than water. Now break it down.
Speaker 2: What is water?
Speaker 1: Stamp was the water is like blood is what I
Speaker 1: hear that water is nothing like in the case of
Speaker 1: me and you and me and mom.
Speaker 2: Yeah blood you share, Yes.
Speaker 1: Thicker than water. I share nothing with Mom, no DNA,
Speaker 1: no material, nothing like that. So that's water in this
Speaker 1: equation that is. I don't know if that's always what
Speaker 1: it means. I think so, but that's what it meant
Speaker 1: in that instance. However, I was a kid seeing it
Speaker 1: through one prison and that had to be explained to
Speaker 1: me by brother, my brother and sister. Like what they're
Speaker 1: saying is uncle Wight blood moment. And I was like
Speaker 1: And even then as a kid, I was like and like,
Speaker 1: why is this a problem? Why did she punch the wall?
Speaker 1: Like that makes no sense? Years later when I find
Speaker 1: out when when one day, like when I'm eighteen nineteen
Speaker 1: years old and my mom is like, well, you don't
Speaker 1: know this, but I'm adopted and my whole fucking world
Speaker 1: was like why forgot?
Speaker 3: Oh my god, what do you mean?
Speaker 1: So never mind, I'll.
Speaker 2: Tell you that till you were eighteen.
Speaker 1: Nobody knew that shit. Nobody knew that shit because back
Speaker 1: then that was like, you don't fucking talk about that,
Speaker 1: like there was a there was a there's a story
Speaker 1: in our family about how was it? Donna? I think
Speaker 1: my cousin Donna like asked my aunt Marie, like something
Speaker 1: about my mom, like, you know, wasn't Aunt Grace adopted?
Speaker 1: And she got fucking smacked, because you can smack a
Speaker 1: kid back in those days. My Aunt Marie was like,
Speaker 1: never say that again, like it was a holy like
Speaker 1: a family secret and not. I don't know why that's like,
Speaker 1: it's not. They weren't ashamed of her. They fucking loved her,
Speaker 1: baby Grace and all this shit. But you know, she
Speaker 1: was Grace McCormick as the child of Anne Schultz and
Speaker 1: Joseph Schultz until she was sixteen. Then she got to
Speaker 1: stand up in court and be like I would like
Speaker 1: to be Schultz instead. Then two years later she married
Speaker 1: my father and lost that name, became a Smith. So she,
Speaker 1: you know, mamily having that.
Speaker 2: That blood is thicker than water would hit even.
Speaker 1: Double fucking heart. And you know who knew, like unlike me,
Speaker 1: my brother and sister, you know who.
Speaker 2: Knew popleas exactly what he was saying.
Speaker 1: Mom. Man, I would never I wouldn't go so far
Speaker 1: as to call my father a henpecked husband, but you know,
Speaker 1: my mother was definitely like the dominant force in the house,
Speaker 1: and my father was, you know, hey, man, whatever makes
Speaker 1: her happen there, it is there, it is comes up.
Speaker 1: But it was a moment where I think my dad
Speaker 1: was just like, you know what, I'm gonna say it,
Speaker 1: but I'm thinking the water, and then regretted it like
Speaker 1: the rest of his life.
Speaker 2: If that was the case, then maybe he was. There
Speaker 2: was a lot building up to that moment, and then
Speaker 2: it was like the worst fucking possible thing came out.
Speaker 1: Think about everything that had to happen in both of
Speaker 1: their lives in order for that moment to happen with
Speaker 1: us as witnesses, and not even understanding the giant implication
Speaker 1: of what he said.
Speaker 2: That's pretty one of this.
Speaker 1: Not even understanding what was said, heard words, but didn't
Speaker 1: understand why that would result in wall bunching and these
Speaker 1: people were not physical. They never fucking roughed us up
Speaker 1: and Ship they never rough except we.
Speaker 2: Get no except for the children mamally threw down at school.
Speaker 1: True, yeah, she was. Actually she's horrible with you guys,
Speaker 1: Hurricane Smith and Ship. I mentioned that to my brother
Speaker 1: the other day. I was like, on the on the podcast,
Speaker 1: me and Harley talked about Hurricane Smith and and my
Speaker 1: mom was in the room and she's going one of
Speaker 1: those boys grew up to be the chief of police.
Speaker 1: I was like, well, because you set them on the
Speaker 1: fucking path of justice, bitch, holy fuck kids.
Speaker 2: Was like hey.
Speaker 1: She was not like hey at all. He was just like, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, hey, man, this ship sucks wall slammed against
Speaker 1: the wall. Words.
Speaker 2: We don't condone violence at all.
Speaker 1: Uh no, we get away with that ship in the seventies.
Speaker 1: But anyway, so my go two on morning or daytime
Speaker 1: talk shows, Oh my, oh my god, I know how
Speaker 1: to bring it. Would never So the talk, you know,
Speaker 1: was primarily about Mamy in the opening and stuff which
Speaker 1: seemed to make the audience comfortable and stuff like that.
Speaker 1: I sound like sociopath. I was like, and amongst the humans,
Speaker 1: I made the audience and then I went about my
Speaker 1: evil agenda, so uh. At one point, I don't know
Speaker 1: fucking how it came up, but I was talking about, like,
Speaker 1: you know, I hike Ondian Canyon. I don't even know
Speaker 1: if I was talking about the dogs, but I.
Speaker 2: Was talking about I publicized that, but any of this, but.
Speaker 1: The I talked about like how like every part of
Speaker 1: my body is always covered except like my calves, because
Speaker 1: my calves are like like I guess my best feature whatever.
Speaker 1: And some lady in the front row goes like show them,
Speaker 1: and then the guy next to me, one of the hosts,
Speaker 1: is like, get up, show him, And I was like,
Speaker 1: all right, and I got up and I fucking stood
Speaker 1: facing the opposite direction, asked to the audience, and then
Speaker 1: got on my tiptoes because he was like a tiptoes,
Speaker 1: presumably to show off my calf muscles. Felt I'd done
Speaker 1: it for enough time and then went and sat down,
Speaker 1: and then he was like, do it again, So I
Speaker 1: got up and did it in a second fucking time.
Speaker 2: I found the clip amusing and it made me laugh.
Speaker 2: But now hearing how it happened, I'm like.
Speaker 1: I said, objectify my dad on said when I said,
Speaker 1: like I've never been objectified before. That was awesome. Oh
Speaker 1: my gosh, it turned in to cheap a piece of
Speaker 1: meat human dignity.
Speaker 2: I kind of I felt, I don't know how to
Speaker 2: feel about it now.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm in thirty years of doing my job,
Speaker 1: like I'm used to being a curio, but I'm I
Speaker 1: was not ever used to somebody being like, show I'm
Speaker 1: fucking cancer. It gives a little cheesecake spin turn around.
Speaker 1: Let's say the.
Speaker 2: Good and somebody did that to me.
Speaker 1: I know, could you imagine with Momily and you're on
Speaker 1: it and then get up and show your fucking ass.
Speaker 1: I'stle your bustle on and you're like, okay, and then
Speaker 1: when you do it like we missed it, do it again.
Speaker 2: You're like, can you fucking imagine? I thought that's crazy.
Speaker 1: I probably would be watching that and she'd be like,
Speaker 1: I'm so proud of her. She hustled her bustle just
Speaker 1: like that.
Speaker 2: No, I'd pop off like mommiy honestly in that moment
Speaker 2: if that happened to me.
Speaker 1: All Right, so it's me. You're on the show, you're
Speaker 1: on the talk, and you're wearing like one of your
Speaker 1: your pair of booty shirts. Pair of booty shirts. It's
Speaker 1: all like cheesecake, look at my legs. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: It was the other day. You were like, don't go
Speaker 1: on my Instagram tonight, and I was like, that is
Speaker 1: the most heinous ship you could tell a pairent. It like,
Speaker 1: you might as well send me an engraved invitation to
Speaker 1: go look at my int because in my head, I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, she took that her OnlyFans conversation serious.
Speaker 1: We're also good. They're gonna put up the I'm gonna
Speaker 1: stop it. And I looked, thank god, oh.
Speaker 2: My god, it is so funny.
Speaker 1: It wasn't that, but it was just you is the
Speaker 1: bunny shirt? Yeah, was the whole thing, like you don't
Speaker 1: want to see me being like that kind of ship?
Speaker 1: Why was I not allowed to look? I don't want to.
Speaker 2: I don't wanna, I don't want to.
Speaker 1: That's between us. I was not When I looked, I
Speaker 1: was relieved. You imagination, when you're like, don't go like
Speaker 1: you're like those fuckers in American Werewolf, stay on the path,
Speaker 1: stay off the moors. It's like, wait, why don't ask?
Speaker 2: Because you can, you can hide your stories from people,
Speaker 2: and I thought that you could do that with your
Speaker 2: post the.
Speaker 1: Case, do me a favor, hide all the horrible animal
Speaker 1: stories that you'll put up there, like you a dump
Speaker 1: this fucking puppy, you piece is shit. He's down the
Speaker 1: road from me. We needs a foster wearing your fucking soul,
Speaker 1: you monster. Anytime I opened your stories, I like, I
Speaker 1: wish you would block this ship.
Speaker 2: I could, but I won't know. But I was trying
Speaker 2: to block my post, but then I found out you
Speaker 2: can't do that.
Speaker 1: You can't block the post.
Speaker 2: No, you can't hide the post from somebody. You can
Speaker 2: only hide the stories. Why we wanted to hide it
Speaker 2: because I didn't want you to see it.
Speaker 1: When do I ever give you ship anymore? One time
Speaker 1: I used to. I used to jump into her fucking
Speaker 1: you know comments and be like and say some dad
Speaker 1: joking ship. And one day she was like, you have
Speaker 1: to stop that, and I was like, yeah, I will.
Speaker 1: She's like, you have to stop that because yeah, she
Speaker 1: got busy. She was like, it's like you're allowing people
Speaker 1: to slept shame me. I was like, what the fuck.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to trying to get some fucking shots.
Speaker 2: And I'm trying to make a.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: No, no, I just more didn't want I didn't want
Speaker 2: you to have to see.
Speaker 1: It, like strolling through my feet, like yeah, yeah, that
Speaker 1: was even that scandalous. There's some fucking the bathing shoes
Speaker 1: shot you put up where I was like, why don't
Speaker 1: you fucking opening only fans, Oh my god, fucking centimeters
Speaker 1: from a nip slip and ship like that. But yes,
Speaker 1: I probably not objectified in horrible way where I'm like
Speaker 1: I'll never go back, don't matter something done?
Speaker 2: So yeah, true, but.
Speaker 1: Honestly, that's it. That's the only area. If they were like,
Speaker 1: you know, we will give you, They're like, you know
Speaker 1: what our audience here and at home, Like if I
Speaker 1: got to call this on Monday where Rob my publicist
Speaker 1: got a call and he was like, talk that camp segment.
Speaker 2: They want to take it and run what they went.
Speaker 1: Megaviral, Like they think this is the beginning of a thing.
Speaker 1: I'm like that the show's ending, Like don't care. They
Speaker 1: want to go out. This could I don't want to.
Speaker 1: I don't want to excite you, but this could save
Speaker 1: the show. I'm like, get the funk out of Like
Speaker 1: people loved the Calf's bit. Honestly, they want to hire
Speaker 1: you as a as a constant correspondent, you'll be on
Speaker 1: every episode of The Talk.
Speaker 2: You have to be turned around and it's your cap.
Speaker 1: Yes, but it's like, okay, so there are They're like,
Speaker 1: there's sixty episodes of The Talk left fantastic, Like every
Speaker 1: show you have to reveal a new body part. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, you haven't let me finish?
Speaker 2: Okay, Wait is this a hypothetical premiere for you?
Speaker 1: For both of us? So it's finite, but it could
Speaker 1: develop into like it could save the show and I
Speaker 1: could fucking keep down it. And they say, if that's
Speaker 1: the case, then I'm just going to join the panel.
Speaker 1: Oh for the next season. No more fucking showing off
Speaker 1: cheese kaking ship. Okay, but with sixty pieces to show up,
Speaker 1: that's everything. Now, don't have to be at once. I'm
Speaker 1: not like a human advent calendar where you open every
Speaker 1: door and.
Speaker 2: Ship your Christmas.
Speaker 1: Like I can't wait till he gets the twenty fifth.
Speaker 1: It is like one piece of a time, So like
Speaker 1: one higher was this ship thigh? One thigh counts Okay,
Speaker 1: so I can like hike up my sadly hike up
Speaker 1: my georts. That's how I think, how again, they start
Speaker 1: talking about my jeworts and ship hike up. My George
Speaker 1: georts were like hugely in style now, oh yeah, And
Speaker 1: I was like, well, you know, I just never gave
Speaker 1: them up, so and then I was talking about like
Speaker 1: I like them because they show off. My only good
Speaker 1: featurigin is my cats.
Speaker 2: And that's when it's not your only good let's see.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and my sparkling wit, like nobody. Ain't nobody jerking
Speaker 1: off to anybody's sparkling wit. They need a visualize. They
Speaker 1: start up the top, they're like gross, but when they
Speaker 1: get to my fucking calves, like that's bank material.
Speaker 2: You do have calves of steels.
Speaker 1: We all know it.
Speaker 2: But you're such a cutie, don't see You're so short.
Speaker 1: Now you're very sweet, and let's see how cutie I am.
Speaker 1: When I fucking pose and fucking bikini shots, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I put it up in my feet and you're like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god. Could you imagine I'm
Speaker 1: wearing a string bikini and ship it's a little marble
Speaker 1: bag just tucking my fucking ship.
Speaker 4: My fucking thunder thighs flowing outside of this string bikini
Speaker 4: and I'm wearing the top as well, And it looks
Speaker 4: like I'm supporting a top, like you know what, it
Speaker 4: works for him, but.
Speaker 1: He's got bubage to hold up.
Speaker 2: He's coming into his own and I'm happy for.
Speaker 1: I don't imagine that will get like two hundred and
Speaker 1: fifty thousand likes. It might be worth it. Why not,
Speaker 1: I'd be terrible for you, Like people be like, isn't
Speaker 1: your father the one who or string bikini on Instagram?
Speaker 1: Thirsty months? Was he always like that?
Speaker 2: It's been a long journey and he's number one.
Speaker 1: He's on his journey and it's been along and it's
Speaker 1: been a long one decades in he's trying.
Speaker 2: If he wants to do that, I support him. If
Speaker 2: he wants to do that himself, I support him. I
Speaker 2: don't know how I feel about the talk. I'm chuck
Speaker 2: defying him now, Yeah, that's.
Speaker 1: What you really got this ship. No, that's go to
Speaker 1: CBS Raptor with a sign that's like the talk on ying.
Speaker 1: Leave our men alone, Leave our men alone, like.
Speaker 2: Leave my dad's cows alone.
Speaker 1: Kevin Smith's daughter, bring a camera, bring a camera.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, what the fuck is happening?
Speaker 1: Madness News at eleven?
Speaker 2: Oh god, she must have a lot of free time, get.
Speaker 1: A job like keep rolling or are continuing Nepo maddness series.
Speaker 2: Fuck, it's too sad.
Speaker 1: If a joke, But he did get up to be
Speaker 1: like should I check on? Yeah, He's like all right,
Speaker 1: insanely empathetic, and she was like, I think you're going
Speaker 1: too far. You was like, Wucky got a bath. We
Speaker 1: took them to sam Screenpaw to get their belt, which
Speaker 1: is a lovely service. I mean, these dogs are fucking big. Well,
Speaker 1: Bucky is very big and Bertie has some sash. But
Speaker 1: when they give them back to you, they put these
Speaker 1: little kerchiefs on them which they cut from. Like Jennifer
Speaker 1: points out, she's like literally like two cents worth of
Speaker 1: but it makes all the difference where it's like I
Speaker 1: can't wait to see what they come out.
Speaker 2: Hello, it is so handsome.
Speaker 1: It's just that extra touch.
Speaker 2: Man that makes so beautiful.
Speaker 1: We had to get them washed because we took them
Speaker 1: to the beach, took them out to Malibu. I was like,
Speaker 1: let's take the dogs for a long ass ride.
Speaker 2: How many times have you been to the beach in
Speaker 2: the past decade? Once Huger.
Speaker 1: Flick because we were right across the street from a beach,
Speaker 1: so we took the dogs there. But we went to
Speaker 1: there's a beach that's outpassed Malibu that's dog friendly and
Speaker 1: it had this like fucking they called it the stairs.
Speaker 1: There were none you know it with stones and fucking
Speaker 1: like it was a rough It was a rough descent
Speaker 1: for anybody, let alone if your car you're leashed to
Speaker 1: two dogs, who like is because you start on the
Speaker 1: cliff and fucking Bertie was just like, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. I'm like, whoa bro holding their back and ship.
Speaker 1: So once we got down to the beach, though, heaven
Speaker 1: it is crazy, we shot video and Harley saw the
Speaker 1: video like they were both just running into the surf
Speaker 1: and like fucking having a blast, and like Birdie was
Speaker 1: opening it up full file. She was chasing seagulls, but
Speaker 1: not on the ground. In the air. They were a
Speaker 1: bover and she'd like trucking down the beach and.
Speaker 2: Shit, she can truly leap. She can gets a lot
Speaker 2: of air. Boatie's pretty impressive.
Speaker 1: So Heven Lucky was like, but a few times, like
Speaker 1: I saw her dive out into the surf and I
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, because the waves are coming
Speaker 1: in pretty hard, and I was, you know, there was
Speaker 1: a moment in my head where I was like, if
Speaker 1: she gets taken out by the undertoe, do not go
Speaker 1: into the water. Because every fucking story you hear about
Speaker 1: like the dog got taken out by a wave, the
Speaker 1: human went to save the dog, the human got taken
Speaker 1: out by the wave. The dog wound up safely on
Speaker 1: the beach because it's got four fucking legs. Most dogs
Speaker 1: can get out of trouble, like with sea trouble, wave trouble.
Speaker 1: Human beings, though, you lose your up and down ship.
Speaker 1: So there was a moment where I had to fucking
Speaker 1: come face to face with the fact that, like, I'm
Speaker 1: no hero, Like if the dog was going in a
Speaker 1: drink and like, I mean, fuck the waves, what if
Speaker 1: a kraken just showed up?
Speaker 2: It was like so so valid, I would.
Speaker 1: Go the other way. I would be like, sorry, Bertie,
Speaker 1: I mean, it's a fucking cracking. I got no. I'm like,
Speaker 1: here's the next meal crack. She's looking back, like why, I'm.
Speaker 2: So glad to hear that this this is uh your
Speaker 2: plan for throwing your children out.
Speaker 1: It's important to human I mean fucking don't go to
Speaker 1: the beach with me, don't go anywhere near the scene.
Speaker 2: Did your fear of sharks come up?
Speaker 1: No, because I wasn't deep in the water enough for
Speaker 1: there to be a shark incident. But if she got.
Speaker 2: Rolling up on the shore. I've seen a lot of
Speaker 2: videos lately of them.
Speaker 1: I've seen a video. I saw a video of a
Speaker 1: bunch of dudes in the shark back into the water,
Speaker 1: which I thought was like, that's really cool, that is
Speaker 1: really cool. And this one was like tied up with
Speaker 1: like a line and a net, so they got out,
Speaker 1: they got it off of them, and then they were
Speaker 1: getting water into them, and then they ushered them into
Speaker 1: the water. And I was like, there's like fucking six dudes,
Speaker 1: and this thing is a like it's it's as big
Speaker 1: as a cow. Yeah, a cow that thrashes wildly. Yeah, Like,
Speaker 1: but that's I'm not that guy. Like if I was
Speaker 1: on the beach i saw a shark, I'd like, fuck no,
Speaker 1: oh my god, I've been I've been fucking watching it.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't eat them, but just destroyed me at age
Speaker 1: fucking five. But I don't even sit down on the
Speaker 1: toilet without looking down first, just in cases a toilet
Speaker 1: shark popping out, I mean, i'd feel bad. And ship,
Speaker 1: I mean, but there's no way that I saw these dudes.
Speaker 1: They were big early dudes. Man. They had their shirts
Speaker 1: off and ship like that, and they were like, as
Speaker 1: this thing's thrashing, they didn't you know, they'd back up
Speaker 1: and then they go back in. I'm like.
Speaker 2: Them helping them out.
Speaker 1: I appreciate it. I thought, I was like, these guys
Speaker 1: are the Batman of the beach and ship. But it
Speaker 1: did make me face the thing about myself where I
Speaker 1: was like, and you are not.
Speaker 2: You're just you are very scared of the ocean. You
Speaker 2: really don't fucks with the ocean.
Speaker 1: In any batman's story. I am neither the hero nor
Speaker 1: the villain. I'm a gotha mite. I'm some bystander that's wanting.
Speaker 1: I'm this acting the guy swinging the penguin with missalone.
Speaker 1: I'm just very reactionary. Yeah, man, it's you like to
Speaker 1: think you're the hero of your own story, and I
Speaker 1: guess really it's more like I'm the main character of
Speaker 1: my own story. But when it comes to heroics.
Speaker 2: You're a hero in a lot of other ways.
Speaker 1: But I'll be terrified. Even the thought of it scares me. Here,
Speaker 1: I got a thought about the water that I want
Speaker 1: to share with. Okay, have you ever heard of Point Nemo?
Speaker 2: Sounds familiar.
Speaker 1: It's not to be confused with finding Nemo, which is
Speaker 1: also not to be confused with finding Dory. Point Nemo.
Speaker 1: Point Nemo, my friend, is the farthest place from land
Speaker 1: on Earth. It is located in the South Pacific Ocean.
Speaker 1: It's the most remote place on the planet, the place
Speaker 1: furthest from land. It is located in the South Pacific
Speaker 1: Ocean and lies twenty seven hundred kilometers or aka seventeen
Speaker 1: hundred miles from the nearest land it is. It's called
Speaker 1: Point Nemo because Nemo in Latin means.
Speaker 2: To tell what.
Speaker 1: The fucking terrifying? No one?
Speaker 2: Nemo? Really? Yeah, finding no one.
Speaker 1: This is the oceanic pole of inaccessibility. Point Nemo is
Speaker 1: also referred to as the oceanic pole of inaccessibility. That
Speaker 1: means that it is the place on the ocean that
Speaker 1: is furthest away from any land. A pole of inaccessibility
Speaker 1: refers to a place on Earth that is the most
Speaker 1: inaccessible to reach. According to set criteria on land. It
Speaker 1: often refers to the point that is farthest from the coastline,
Speaker 1: aka like a mountain. So the Northern Pole of inaccessibility
Speaker 1: is located in the Arctic Ocean in the pack ice.
Speaker 1: And then the Southern Pole of inaccessibility commonly refers to
Speaker 1: a location in a form of Soviet Union Research station
Speaker 1: in Antarctica about five hundred and forty eight miles from
Speaker 1: the terrestrial South Pole. Now, when you are at Point Nemo,
Speaker 1: you are closer to the astronauts in suborbital in SubOrbit
Speaker 1: around the Earth than you are to the nearest human
Speaker 1: being on your own planets.
Speaker 3: Rough.
Speaker 1: Now I'm gonna I want to take you in journey
Speaker 1: in your mind you have you know, you're just fucking
Speaker 1: what we what? What do you do out in the world,
Speaker 1: Like like what did you when did you go to
Speaker 1: event recently? Or something like that. Go to a concert,
Speaker 1: So you're going to a show, and you're like that
Speaker 1: you should show. And then you go outside to get
Speaker 1: into your car and you fucking get somebody puts the
Speaker 1: fucking thing over your mouth and chlorophoms you out like
Speaker 1: a chloroform jah, oh my god. So then you wake
Speaker 1: up in a little dinghy like a little blow up
Speaker 1: raft and you've been left at point nemo? Right do
Speaker 1: you furthest from any land and any hope? Now doesn't
Speaker 1: mean your furtherest. Many boats could be boats within one
Speaker 1: thousand miles, but you in a little raft in the
Speaker 1: middle of the ocean seventeen hundred miles from the nearest
Speaker 1: place on earth where you can step off your little
Speaker 1: boat and be like land, and less than seventeen hundred
Speaker 1: miles from a dude in a fucking spaceship who's looking down.
Speaker 1: You're going sucks to be you. Fuck? What do you do?
Speaker 1: Do you think you live? Do you strive to live?
Speaker 1: Or do you just like fucking roll off the raft?
Speaker 1: And I hate to.
Speaker 2: No provisions, hate to be a downer, but I would
Speaker 2: probably just throw myself to the animals of the ocean.
Speaker 1: Bro Like you wouldn't even know in which direction to pass.
Speaker 2: No, I give up. I think I would give up.
Speaker 2: I gotta say. I think I would have to ultimately
Speaker 2: just call.
Speaker 1: It quits, like who did this? I mean, honestly, that's
Speaker 1: like I probably spend the first day, you know, because
Speaker 1: human instinct to like stay alive or shit like that.
Speaker 1: I'd probably spend the first day like trying to put
Speaker 1: together what the fuck happened? Who did this? Yeah, I'm here.
Speaker 2: There'd probably be a few days prior to me calling
Speaker 2: it quits. But eventually, what you're going to do, I
Speaker 2: mean at the end of the day.
Speaker 1: Also, they didn't leave you or so if you're paddling,
Speaker 1: oh fucking great in the ocean.
Speaker 2: Is there a tree? Wait, there's no wait.
Speaker 1: No land.
Speaker 2: Oh there's no land. There's not even a small island.
Speaker 1: Let's see. Oh my god, there's so many facts I'm
Speaker 1: going to feed you about.
Speaker 2: Points picturing a small island, but that's not even part
Speaker 2: of it.
Speaker 1: Who discovered Point Nemo. The location of Port Nemo was
Speaker 1: first calculated in nineteen ninety two by Croatian Canadian survey
Speaker 1: engineer Hevie Luca Terry based on the Debt butchered that
Speaker 1: name Sorry. Based on the data from the Digital Chart
Speaker 1: of the World compiled by the US Defense Mapping Agency,
Speaker 1: this is now the National Geo Spatial Intelligence Agency, Point
Speaker 1: Nemo a lifeless spot. It is clear that there is
Speaker 1: no human life anywhere near Point Nemo. Well, there doesn't
Speaker 1: seem to be much sea life either. Point Nemo's location
Speaker 1: falls at the center of the Southern Pacific gyre or
Speaker 1: gyre as in the widening gyret, a rotating ocean current
Speaker 1: that keeps nutrient rich waters away from the area. The
Speaker 1: huge distance from Point Nemo to land also implies that
Speaker 1: nutrient runoff from coastal waters does not reach the area easily.
Speaker 1: Marine creatures would otherwise settle near Point Nemo simply have
Speaker 1: no food to thrive there. You are alone, bro, you
Speaker 1: know you can't even give yourself.
Speaker 2: I can't even feed myself to the.
Speaker 1: No, you can feed yourself from the sea. Well, go
Speaker 1: to sleep, rollover.
Speaker 2: There are there is no hopeful option in the scenario.
Speaker 1: You know there is hope. Ready, researchers have only found
Speaker 1: bacteria and small crabs living in the volcanic vents of
Speaker 1: the seafloor around Point Nemo. So if you roll off,
Speaker 1: if you're hungry, you roll off and swim the depths
Speaker 1: to the bottom of the seafloor where the volcanic fence are.
Speaker 1: You might be able to get one of those crabs.
Speaker 2: So I just to survive to the depths.
Speaker 1: And well you might not because there's pollution. In twenty
Speaker 1: eighteen up to twenty six hundred microplastic particles per cubic meter.
Speaker 1: We're found in seawater samples collected near Point Nemo by
Speaker 1: passing vessels. How fucking solid is that?
Speaker 2: Fucking depressing?
Speaker 1: Well, I'll take you away from depression right into fucking terror.
Speaker 2: Ready, Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Point Nemo's location is coincidentally close to that of Riley.
Speaker 1: You know that is HP Lovecrafts fictional sunken city the
Speaker 1: entity Cthulhu is interred.
Speaker 3: My man.
Speaker 1: Cthulhus from their Clovecraft placed the city at a longitude
Speaker 1: and latitude in the South Pacific Ocean, very close to
Speaker 1: what became Point Nemo.
Speaker 2: Dude, nobody's there's no sea life hanging out because it's
Speaker 2: fucking cthulhu's playground. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: In nineteen ninety seven, researchers from America's National Oceanic and
Speaker 1: Atmospheric Administration NOAH detected an ultra low frequency sound near
Speaker 1: Point Nemo that they could not explain. They called it
Speaker 1: the bloop.
Speaker 2: I feel like I remember the bloop.
Speaker 1: We talked about the bloop.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: H P Lovecraft fans quickly associated the sound with Cthulhu,
Speaker 1: even though there is not much biological activity near Point Nemo.
Speaker 1: Some scientists hypothesize there was actually the call of an
Speaker 1: unidentified marine animal aka the Leathon.
Speaker 2: That's so fucking cool.
Speaker 1: In two thousand and five, the sound was finally found
Speaker 1: to be produced by the six headed beast that is
Speaker 1: known as Lefiathon, one of the seven Princes of Hell,
Speaker 1: a non tectonic ice quake from glacial movements in Antartica.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, whatever you.
Speaker 1: Want, ruins all the no.
Speaker 2: I was culu fucking They're just covering their ass.
Speaker 1: Point Nemo as a spacecraft cemetery. By the way, all
Speaker 1: of this information comes from a website called interesting engineering
Speaker 1: dot com.
Speaker 2: Wait a spacecraft cemetery.
Speaker 1: Space agencies have found that an extremely isolated location like
Speaker 1: Point Nemo is a safe scuttling site for satellites and
Speaker 1: spacecraft that are diorbited to the Earth. Diorbited means like
Speaker 1: bring it down fancy fucking name for crash at the
Speaker 1: end of their useful lines. Using controlled landings, space agencies
Speaker 1: can deliberately splash down decommissioned spacecraft in this remote area
Speaker 1: without affecting people or maritime traffic in the process, so
Speaker 1: they could bring it down without fucking like, oh my God,
Speaker 1: I killed a boat because nobody except a couple of
Speaker 1: crabs that are.
Speaker 2: Like, for fucking real, are like, what the fuck?
Speaker 1: Nothing ever happens down here. Many smaller retired spacecraft disintegrate
Speaker 1: and burn up as they re enter the Earth's atmosphere.
Speaker 1: But if they were too large to burn by themselves,
Speaker 1: then they are intentionally crashed. At Point Nemo man an
Speaker 1: area that is beyond the legal jurisdiction of any country. Bro.
Speaker 1: That's when they talk about like, you're at fucking sea, man,
Speaker 1: you're at maritime fucking like law or whatever. There's where
Speaker 1: when they're you're a deep at sea, there are no
Speaker 1: laws because you don't belong to any country. If you're
Speaker 1: a Point Nemo, you are in a lawless world. Somebody
Speaker 1: could show up kill you get away with it because
Speaker 1: there ain't no laws there. But if they showed up,
Speaker 1: I'm sure you'd be happy to see somebody, like, come on,
Speaker 1: but please don't kill them them. That's the first right.
Speaker 1: If that didn't occur to you, you're doing it.
Speaker 2: I'm gone at this point. I'm living with ka Zulu.
Speaker 1: At this point, Puff is waiting for you somewhere for real. Yeah,
Speaker 1: fucking Austin is just like, where'd you go? Arley? You
Speaker 1: lastly sawry You went to the bathroom at the fucking
Speaker 1: club gig.
Speaker 2: You know, I'm a point nemo.
Speaker 1: Oh my stay alive for puff bro.
Speaker 2: How did you give you though?
Speaker 1: Like fucking like, you know, your phone's on and you
Speaker 1: don't have any signal, but there was a message that
Speaker 1: came through before you got fucking you know, taken or whatever,
Speaker 1: Like you felt it buzz in your pocket, but you
Speaker 1: never checked it until fucking you know, it was twenty
Speaker 1: four hours later when you woke up. It in the
Speaker 1: middle of nowhere, point Nema, and you checked the message
Speaker 1: and it's Quentin Tarantino. He's like, hey, man, I want
Speaker 1: you to see the lead in many movie. I'm fucking swimming. Yes,
Speaker 1: you'll find a way to live. I'm fucking coming. Don't
Speaker 1: worry about my way. The fucking cthulhu could rise and
Speaker 1: fucking you don't wait.
Speaker 2: My time has come.
Speaker 1: Wait give a fucking mamaly to that motherfucker right hook
Speaker 1: right into his mode.
Speaker 2: I talked with and I'd ask him for a ride.
Speaker 2: I'd be like, listen, I'll come right back.
Speaker 1: He's like, I am chaos. I am fucking death. I am,
Speaker 1: and you're like, well, I am believing the Quentin tarantin
Speaker 1: the moment, He's like, and I am your ride, Get
Speaker 1: on my back. I've always got it to me.
Speaker 5: Wow.
Speaker 1: We feel about Kevin Smith. Hate that fucking guy. Why
Speaker 1: no reason? Keep going?
Speaker 2: No, Cathulu loves you. We speak so highly about him.
Speaker 1: Cthulhu is like, I have been sleeping for thousands of
Speaker 1: years and all he did was make Clarks.
Speaker 2: We don't want to look up.
Speaker 1: A That is some interesting fucking shit, dude. That's fucking
Speaker 1: Point Nemo is now my new nightmare, dude. Exact location
Speaker 1: of Point Nemo is calculated at this longitude latitude is
Speaker 1: seventeen hundred miles from the nearest islands in the South
Speaker 1: Sific Ocean. Deucey Island, an uninhabited atoll that is part
Speaker 1: of the Pitcairn Islands to the north, Motu Nui, the
Speaker 1: largest of the three islets, near Easter Island to the northeast,
Speaker 1: and Mayor Island off the coast. Event are because unclaimed
Speaker 1: territory of Marie Birdland to the south. All these islands
Speaker 1: are uninhabited. To find civilization, you'd have to go to
Speaker 1: easter Island Rapanui, one of the most remote inhabited islands
Speaker 1: in the world, about twenty two hundred miles to the
Speaker 1: east of Chile or to New Zealand about twenty five
Speaker 1: hundred miles away Man. Because there are no airports at
Speaker 1: Point Nemo, this trip can only be made by boat.
Speaker 1: So if you woke up, you'd be like, who the
Speaker 1: fuck went through the trouble of getting my ass here?
Speaker 2: They really fucking hated me.
Speaker 1: Think about how black mirror that would because if you
Speaker 1: woke up and you can't get there by plane, somebody
Speaker 1: took you there by boat. You look all around you,
Speaker 1: there is no boat to be seen, and you are
Speaker 1: at a point where it's flat forever, so you would
Speaker 1: be able to see a boat. So seeing no boat
Speaker 1: would make you even more fucking terrified. In any direction
Speaker 1: you look, it's not like in the distance I see
Speaker 1: the boat.
Speaker 2: Nothing.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that would drive me mad madness.
Speaker 2: That's that's what I'm saying. I'm probably called quits unless
Speaker 2: and you know what.
Speaker 1: It ain't gonna be twenty four hours later because there
Speaker 1: are Because there are no airports at Point Emo, this
Speaker 1: trip can only be made by boat and it could
Speaker 1: take more than two weeks to complete. It takes two
Speaker 1: weeks to get to this fucking hellhole. This is hell
Speaker 1: mouth right here. Oh my, this is the entrance to fucking.
Speaker 2: That is the entrance to fucking hell. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Wait, but but just for one sad moment that that's
Speaker 2: so sad that there's plastic all the way out there.
Speaker 2: It takes two fucking weeks to get there.
Speaker 1: Oh that's our only hope of killing Cathule is all
Speaker 1: the microplastics. Why is this taste like sprite? Hol ready
Speaker 1: for plastics? Yeah? Fuck him? He can choke on He
Speaker 1: can choke on an old polk bottle as far as serious, Yeah,
Speaker 1: brock with that. Why look at him? He's evil? What
Speaker 1: are you nuts? There ain't nothing good about that. Let
Speaker 1: s follow your soul. You think he's gonna be a
Speaker 1: cuddle buddy, And shit, that ain't fucking birdy or lucky,
Speaker 1: my friend, That ain't no cinnamon.
Speaker 2: He's got fucking wings.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's darkness personifie. In the meantime, the nearest is
Speaker 1: like I got real, Like, hey man, no, yeah, fucking
Speaker 1: there's a time and place for voolling around, But we
Speaker 1: don't fuck with Cululu. He's not cuddling. In the meantime,
Speaker 1: the nearest humans to Point Nemo are often the astronauts
Speaker 1: aboard the International Space Station, who, when they passed directly
Speaker 1: over Point Nemo, are just about two hundred and fifty
Speaker 1: eight miles away, much closer than any other human on
Speaker 1: Earth at that point. That so, you're seventeen hundred miles
Speaker 1: from land, but two hundred and sixty miles from an astronaut.
Speaker 2: What nightmares are made of?
Speaker 1: Bro? You are not kidding. Yeah, Oh my god, Point
Speaker 1: Nemo I call the hell on Earth.
Speaker 2: I think that is very valid. That was fucking terrifying.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. From their kids. Move on to passion, irration.
Speaker 2: That I don't even know how, I don't.
Speaker 1: The madness of mamily, Oh my god, to the desolation
Speaker 1: of Point Nemo.
Speaker 2: In somewhere in there, the objectification of your calves.
Speaker 1: That's true. That's true. I turned into a piece of meat.
Speaker 1: We've been if I was ever like if that happened
Speaker 1: to me and I found myself on a fucking rubber
Speaker 1: dinghy and fucking Point Nemo and ship with the objectification
Speaker 1: on the talk even crossed my mind at that point,
Speaker 1: like I can't believe they made me show off my
Speaker 1: fucking what's next, my dick?
Speaker 2: I mean, you have a lot of time to think
Speaker 2: that point.
Speaker 1: If it really bothered me, I'd be like, well, they're
Speaker 1: getting canceled soon, and.
Speaker 2: Then kaZulu comes up and swallows you the top one
Speaker 2: at Lisa didn't kisseled.
Speaker 1: All right, kids, it's time. It's that magical time time
Speaker 1: everyone waits for when we fucking listen and beerless. Stick
Speaker 1: with me, so true passion irration. H this is where
Speaker 1: we uh talk about things we love, where we shout,
Speaker 1: which is what it's called elsewhere, But here we have
Speaker 1: passion for it or we would like to ration it.
Speaker 1: We want more of that loss of everything else, or
Speaker 1: less of that more of everything else?
Speaker 2: Are we starting with our with our passion and ration
Speaker 2: of the week, or with our quick fired passionate rash?
Speaker 1: You tell me, my friend, you take the wheel, you
Speaker 1: drive for a while, how you want to do? Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's see how you do.
Speaker 2: It'll get real depressing us.
Speaker 1: I would like to Russian all things good and kind.
Speaker 2: Ration, all good things gonna go.
Speaker 1: Let's well, we'll it feels like we should. Well, if
Speaker 1: we were smart, we would do the you know, fucking
Speaker 1: big ones. All right, well, let's look at it this way.
Speaker 1: If you do the two big ones first, then you
Speaker 1: do rapid fire at the end. It's fun to go out, yeah,
Speaker 1: But if you do the rapid fire up fun, it's
Speaker 1: fun to get into and then it gives you a
Speaker 1: chance to be like, no, my so bad. I don't
Speaker 1: like it. You do in me and ration him, but
Speaker 1: I'm cute.
Speaker 2: I had passion for him, because who's passion for me?
Speaker 1: So we'll do that. We'll just start with the rapid fire.
Speaker 1: All right, passion irration, I'll begin it. We'll go one
Speaker 1: for one passion ration.
Speaker 5: Starbucks ration really ashion the fudge. I thought your entire
Speaker 5: generation was like, that's our blood. They were like, Starbucks
Speaker 5: is thicker than water bro.
Speaker 2: They're a boycotted company right now.
Speaker 1: Are they really? Yeah? That's why it's political. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: shy of the politics. Would you be like coffee? Are
Speaker 1: you a coffee? No? I hate you don't like coffee either.
Speaker 2: I don't like coffee makes me sick and also it
Speaker 2: tastes bad.
Speaker 1: It's fine, I mean, anybody is free to do whatever
Speaker 1: they want. But I have never found a fucking taste for.
Speaker 2: I don't like how it taste. I really don't.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna. I don't have adult I don't have an
Speaker 1: adult paltt.
Speaker 2: That is true. That is actually the truest thing I've
Speaker 2: ever heard. He took a hot dog bun and made
Speaker 2: a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the other day.
Speaker 1: Don't fuck it. It was a peanut butter and vegan
Speaker 1: fluff sandwich. No jelly, My bad.
Speaker 2: It was a fluffer or.
Speaker 1: On the white trash I used to love as a
Speaker 1: kid buffing under. Now they got a vegan version, so
Speaker 1: I'm like, we all right, So ration.
Speaker 2: No Starbucks for me. I'm a Duncan type of gow,
Speaker 2: which is because for no Duncans out here there's one
Speaker 2: or two, there's like fucking one.
Speaker 1: You really, America runs on Duncan.
Speaker 2: To be honest, Yeah, it's crazy. I'm new. It was
Speaker 2: never here like, so I'm pretty nude to it.
Speaker 1: But Bro Duncan Donuts was a feature of my life
Speaker 1: growing up. Their Massachusetts company a bunch of massholes and stuff,
Speaker 1: so it grew out from there. So in Jersey we
Speaker 1: always had Dunkin Dunkin Donuts when we were kids. Man,
Speaker 1: Oh what a treat that was like they had they
Speaker 1: invented the munchkin or aka the donut hole aka And
Speaker 1: what do they call them to tim.
Speaker 2: Hortons, Oh what do they call them?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 1: My god, tim bits. So they had them first, and
Speaker 1: they're called munchkins, dunkin donut munchkins. And they came in
Speaker 1: a sp a little box that had like a munchkin
Speaker 1: face on it stuff like a little face, but not
Speaker 1: a munchkin, Like that's a munchkin from the Wizard of Oz.
Speaker 1: But technically that's where the word came from from the
Speaker 1: Wizard of Oz didn't exist prior to that, like L.
Speaker 1: Frank Baum invented the word munchkin. So I'm not I
Speaker 1: wonder what wonder Duncan got away with that. And do
Speaker 1: they still call them munchkins?
Speaker 2: I don't know what they do, but maybe they do.
Speaker 2: I'm not sure. I really only get to have it
Speaker 2: when I go to the East Coast. Seriously, Yeah, when
Speaker 2: I'm in Virginia visiting Puff's family. Oh that's when you
Speaker 2: go hard drive through Duncans. I'm like, let's go. They
Speaker 2: do what they do. I believe they need more vegan options. Yes,
Speaker 2: I would love if they had a vegan donut.
Speaker 1: Without without being This ain't like activist talk. It's just
Speaker 1: like you're making a donut and fried dough. Just fucking
Speaker 1: leave the.
Speaker 2: The hash browns are vegan, those little hash browns, the
Speaker 2: little hash browns. Avocado toast is vegan. You can get
Speaker 2: a macho with some fucking coconut milk.
Speaker 1: Bro, you were born in New Jersey, Little Jersey girl,
Speaker 1: and if you fuck if, if you were in my way,
Speaker 1: you would have been grown up on Duncan. But that
Speaker 1: would have been bad too, because you might have been like,
Speaker 1: we're not a munchkin. Oh god, there's a place I
Speaker 1: used to eat way too much Duncan and I weighed
Speaker 1: about veggest three hundred and thirty pounds.
Speaker 2: Really don't it's helped, Wow.
Speaker 1: Oh lot, all those all of those fucking munchkins as
Speaker 1: a youth. But we didn't get them all the time.
Speaker 1: It wasn't like that was a steady staple of our diet.
Speaker 1: It was a fucking treat. That's how huge Duncan was.
Speaker 1: We got one Atlantic Islands. I know, I'm into it,
Speaker 1: not far from small gassel cinemas where the movie has
Speaker 1: come to play. All right, you give me one man,
Speaker 1: I'm smised by your Starbucks. I'm not.
Speaker 2: I'm not finny, what about you?
Speaker 1: I never fucked with Starbucks. Fuck coffee, all right? And
Speaker 1: also like I'm not against him or anything like that,
Speaker 1: but like they don't have anything I want. They ain't
Speaker 1: got nothing from me. I feel that, not in a
Speaker 1: shitty way where I'm like fuck them, like not every
Speaker 1: stores for me? Then you know, Look, I'm a vegan.
Speaker 1: I don't even go to vegetable stores. So finicky the
Speaker 1: vegetable store, whatever that may be, there's one right, people
Speaker 1: will get their vegetables. Are they not going to the
Speaker 1: vegetable store? The fuck? Are you having a stroke? Why
Speaker 1: the fs a vegetable sture? There isn't a such thing.
Speaker 2: What do you mean?
Speaker 1: Sociopathic secret? Is that I must blend with the humans? Okay,
Speaker 1: my bad, We're going to the fruit stand.
Speaker 2: If you can't find a fruit stand, I know that's
Speaker 2: how I covered up. Yeah, there you go, all right?
Speaker 2: All right? Passion or ration vanity plates?
Speaker 1: Oh wow? What is my stance? Yeah, I'm gonna I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say passion. You do, yeah, it makes you happy.
Speaker 1: But I've always whenever I thought about it like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, Chris Davis had plates that set askew. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: and he just gave me one because he got it
Speaker 1: was hit that car or whatever. Really yeah, And so
Speaker 1: I always thought like, oh, I could do like Silent
Speaker 1: Bob or whatever.
Speaker 2: You don't need to identify your hard But.
Speaker 1: Also the way I drive, it's like you want to
Speaker 1: make it any easier. On a job, he was like, oh, hello,
Speaker 1: Silent Bob one doing ninety five and forty five? Were
Speaker 1: we looks like Silent Bob's in number two? License registration please?
Speaker 1: I was just on my way to dunkin Donuts. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, have you got a license?
Speaker 2: I feel there's too many letters.
Speaker 1: Anyways, it would be like s l N T B
Speaker 1: zero B true. I thought about it, but that's how
Speaker 1: you get caught. Man. You want to have like an
Speaker 1: license plate that's tough for people to be like for
Speaker 1: and why god fuck I couldn't get it. But if
Speaker 1: it's Silent Bob one, they're like, I know exactly who
Speaker 1: did it.
Speaker 2: You could just like drive.
Speaker 1: I guess I could talk and obey the rules of
Speaker 1: the road, but I don't know.
Speaker 2: You could just like be safe.
Speaker 1: You have to get anywhere man. Okay, so yeah, passion
Speaker 1: for for but not.
Speaker 2: For me, your passion for others.
Speaker 1: But I love the idea, and I've often thought about it,
Speaker 1: but it's like it would be foolhardy for me to get,
Speaker 1: you know, a vanity plate. But why why do you
Speaker 1: bring it up? Did you see one in a while?
Speaker 2: You're like I see them all the time?
Speaker 1: Man? What are you? Passionate? Irration?
Speaker 2: Annoying me a little bit?
Speaker 1: Really?
Speaker 2: It's like a this is baby.
Speaker 1: You have heard from fraeulein First World? You know what's I.
Speaker 2: Hate very much? When it's like I am heart la
Speaker 2: what one two three?
Speaker 1: There's somebody upstairs who would probably love to give that
Speaker 1: license plate and ship.
Speaker 2: I mean, I agree, express yourself.
Speaker 1: Acting for me.
Speaker 2: It just seems.
Speaker 1: That could be your license plate.
Speaker 2: Oh god, I'm more of like a decorator ship with stickers.
Speaker 5: G V E.
Speaker 1: Emmy M one and am give me back my name?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 3: That pa?
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Harley Quinn Smith, she played John Proctor
Speaker 1: in that production of The Cristal in high school, famously
Speaker 1: give me back my Name Woman. She couldn't put woman
Speaker 1: on the plate. She probably is a second car and
Speaker 1: that plate says woman, and she parks them next to
Speaker 1: each other.
Speaker 2: That would be pretty fire.
Speaker 1: Oh, to be the overly wealthy rich kid of Simon
Speaker 1: Bob with money to blaze and burn.
Speaker 2: As we said last time. No, I mean I love stickers,
Speaker 2: like stickers on the car.
Speaker 1: We're not passionate rationing stickers. I like stickers. Is that
Speaker 1: like a license plate sticker?
Speaker 2: Cars with stickers? But the Bavanny place just I don't
Speaker 2: know something something.
Speaker 1: It's probably something you see way more of here in
Speaker 1: this town than you would.
Speaker 2: I see them every day all day, and it's always
Speaker 2: like really fucking annoying ass Los Angeles type beat type
Speaker 2: of things.
Speaker 3: Between back I'm always.
Speaker 6: Like, oh again, I thinkunless you're driving the fucking speed limit,
Speaker 6: and I don't know why you'd ever do that.
Speaker 1: Like a fucking kindergarten or something like your role model.
Speaker 1: Come on when it comes to driving elsewhere. Oh God, passion, irration, working.
Speaker 2: Out, passion fox, Seriously, I love working out.
Speaker 1: Now when you say that, do you mean you love
Speaker 1: working out because you like the results, or like I.
Speaker 2: Like the bro The results don't even really come through
Speaker 2: with my hormone disorder. What do you like about it?
Speaker 2: It really just well one, I would be fucking even
Speaker 2: crazier than I am if I wasn't working out. It
Speaker 2: regulates my my mental disorder, so I would say that help.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. Yeah, it uses my anxiety, eases my depression,
Speaker 2: every everything. It makes me listen, it makes me feel
Speaker 2: less crazy.
Speaker 1: It doesn't do that for me. It just makes me like,
Speaker 1: I hate you know. The only thing I like about
Speaker 1: the walk with the dogs is how it makes the
Speaker 1: dogs happy. I'm like, look at me.
Speaker 2: You don't do running for yourself.
Speaker 1: I do running for my health, but I don't enjoy it. Like, yeah,
Speaker 1: do you enjoy it? No way, Given my drothers, if
Speaker 1: it's like you can do runyon or never do running
Speaker 1: in your body will be the exact same and you
Speaker 1: won't gain weight and blah blah blah, I would not.
Speaker 1: I would choose not to do running except for the dogs.
Speaker 2: Which I can hate.
Speaker 1: Hiking I hate It's easy, the easiest of all the world.
Speaker 2: Walking, hiking, and running are all out of the question
Speaker 2: for me.
Speaker 1: I don't like you would rather go to a place
Speaker 1: and be like, yes, yes, I was doing it wrong. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I would rather walk. I do no muscle work whatsoever.
Speaker 1: So if anybody comes up to me in a bar
Speaker 1: and like hey pussy and they punch me, I'll be
Speaker 1: like that really hurt.
Speaker 2: I'll punch him for you.
Speaker 1: Well, you got some muscles and ship.
Speaker 2: I feel like I got some strength. I always I say, I.
Speaker 1: Ain't challenging arm wrestle. I'm just saying, do you feel strong?
Speaker 2: I feel that if I was ever in danger and
Speaker 2: I could get somebody on the ground, I could knock
Speaker 2: them out with my legs. I think I could like suffocate.
Speaker 1: What the fuck I'm trying to get my head around
Speaker 1: the snow. My arms aren't that strong, but my legs
Speaker 1: are super fucking strong. Put them in figure forces are
Speaker 1: locking ship like that, I.
Speaker 2: Like, I'll kick them to the ground.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then put his head between your legs and
Speaker 1: figure for him and ship piece of s.
Speaker 2: Yeah, check them out. Yeah, that's how That's how I feel.
Speaker 2: That's my plan for if anybody tries to drug me,
Speaker 2: to take me to fucking point memo.
Speaker 1: That's that's that's you're ready.
Speaker 2: That's my plan.
Speaker 1: If I I get attacked, my plan is like, don't
Speaker 1: hit me, I'll suck your dick. Pl that don't work.
Speaker 1: If that don't work. Nothing's gonna work. Brute strength, thing
Speaker 1: is gonna work.
Speaker 2: You should wear rings like this.
Speaker 1: I look at that ship man constantly. I could be
Speaker 1: wearing these fucking brass knuckles, and people like you seem
Speaker 1: ready to fucking start ship. Why in thirty years have
Speaker 1: you ever had a fight in your career? Yeah? A
Speaker 1: lot with people online.
Speaker 2: That's true.
Speaker 1: All right, So working out?
Speaker 2: I love working out, not not walking, running or hiking though.
Speaker 1: Ration, bro, I mean working out. Yeah, that's true. I
Speaker 1: don't even work out, I just like but even that,
Speaker 1: I consider working out ration for me.
Speaker 2: I don't even like standing, but I like.
Speaker 1: The worst exercises and standing up.
Speaker 2: I'm always trying to take a seat.
Speaker 1: I was down and they want me to get up home.
Speaker 1: The fuck? What's up there? I'm down here now I'm here.
Speaker 1: I don't like what do you got?
Speaker 2: Okay? Passion or rash in playing video.
Speaker 1: Games when I was a kid, passion, but like as
Speaker 1: an adult ration, because if I do that, I ain't
Speaker 1: got anything done. You get lost in that world. I know. Fun,
Speaker 1: Remember we played when you were kids, play like Lego
Speaker 1: Lego games, so fun, good times.
Speaker 2: But yeah, in that little room, that's right, next door.
Speaker 1: If you ever want to bring over a fucking video
Speaker 1: game system and play game, we got the TV upstairs.
Speaker 1: I'm happy to do it.
Speaker 2: I recently which game fell down, really really Deepole. There's
Speaker 2: this game called Five Nights. I've ready's.
Speaker 1: Yeah, gee, what's that about. It's not a member of
Speaker 1: the main stream.
Speaker 2: I just played it for the first times.
Speaker 1: In every fucking what was that place called? They still exist? Yeah?
Speaker 1: They still no fucking you know, we're by like my
Speaker 1: Chemical Romance.
Speaker 3: Shirts and Topic.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, they're still around Spencer's. Maybe is no.
Speaker 2: We fucking just saw Spencers, remember, and you were like,
Speaker 2: this is like the other version of Hot Topic. Oh
Speaker 2: my god, we want to build a bear.
Speaker 1: I guess I'm just thinking of the mall where I
Speaker 1: used to see both of them in Eaton Town, New Jerseys.
Speaker 2: Now Hot Topic is still at Hollywood Highland?
Speaker 1: Did they still have that store there? They gave me
Speaker 1: I'll never forget, man, the fucking they gave me an
Speaker 1: icon Award the one year for Jane and Sopwa. They
Speaker 1: gave me a fucking card. I could go into any
Speaker 1: Hot Topic and it was like for fifty percent off
Speaker 1: and ship. I never used it.
Speaker 2: You know where that is.
Speaker 1: It's not good anymore. So one year. Oh you're only
Speaker 1: an icon for a year. And then they moved the fun.
Speaker 2: Like all right, anyways, next.
Speaker 1: Time at all? Right, so did you go orre me go?
Speaker 2: Now it's now it's you what did you go? Video games?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Oh but mine right right now? I never, I never really.
Speaker 1: I didn't even say that.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, well you said it used to be passion
Speaker 2: now ration.
Speaker 1: For me, it would have to be ration because if
Speaker 1: I fall down that hole, I won't get anything done,
Speaker 1: because that's they're fun and fucking then like trying to
Speaker 1: get to the next level. You know who'd be terrible.
Speaker 2: Because she remember when we played Mario, Yes, she just
Speaker 2: wanted to be that one character. No, Ludwig, Ludwig what's
Speaker 2: his name? I'm like, weird fucking relative of Bowser chose
Speaker 2: the bad guy?
Speaker 1: Mm? Yeah, she she would fall down that hole and
Speaker 1: get lost. I get lost with her, but I'm not
Speaker 1: against him. It's just for me, that would be a time.
Speaker 1: So I was creating. I'd rather create.
Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, for sure, but that means.
Speaker 1: I'm not creating at the moment. Then perhaps I like
Speaker 1: to play Little Mario Kart Little five. I got, So,
Speaker 1: did you see the movie?
Speaker 2: Yeah, no comments, but I got.
Speaker 1: To show the movie before you start playing the game. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So was it the movie that introduced you to the concept?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: And then somebody was like, you got to play it?
Speaker 2: And then so I was at somebody's place recently and
Speaker 2: they were playing it, and I was like, this looks
Speaker 2: really fun.
Speaker 1: And then I.
Speaker 2: Only play Mario Card and Mario Party. But I got
Speaker 2: I got real deep in it, and I started having
Speaker 2: I had a dream where like, because you have to
Speaker 2: spoil alert alert, you have to get past the five nights.
Speaker 2: It's one night at a time.
Speaker 1: That's the is a boss and it's.
Speaker 2: Twelve it's midnight to six am, and you have to
Speaker 2: survive till six a m. And I got. I got
Speaker 2: past the first three nights, and then for like a month,
Speaker 2: I could not get past night before. And then I
Speaker 2: started having dreams that I was beating it, and then
Speaker 2: I'd wake up and then I'd be like the other day,
Speaker 2: I beat it the whole game. I beat the whole
Speaker 2: ass game.
Speaker 1: You can do for the rest of your life.
Speaker 2: Well, also, spoiler alert, there's a night six.
Speaker 1: Nights continue on you, man, it's so funny because yesterday
Speaker 1: I was just saying to Jennifer's like, you know what, man,
Speaker 1: I'm really fucking thankful every day that the kid like
Speaker 1: didn't fall into like a drug bowl, because I saw
Speaker 1: the peace about MacArthur Park and like there was like
Speaker 1: they weren't showing like, you know, uh, look at all
Speaker 1: these almost people. They were showing fuckers that look like you,
Speaker 1: like your age dressed, not like living on the street,
Speaker 1: like carrying their fucking purse, but like sitting on a
Speaker 1: bench folded over in half that's fucked up on fentanyl
Speaker 1: and shit like that. And when I watched it, I
Speaker 1: was like, my first off, I realized, like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I can't watch much of this because this is what
Speaker 1: happens to like old people. They watch like scary news
Speaker 1: stories and like the world needs to be saved and
Speaker 1: that's the news. Is the news for a reason, Like
Speaker 1: they show you the worst parts. It's true, like life
Speaker 1: is not the worst parts. Life is good things and
Speaker 1: bad things and stuff. But good things, don't you know,
Speaker 1: aren't interesting to people, but fucking like they're like, look
Speaker 1: at the fucking problem in MacArthur Park with drug and
Speaker 1: even hooked me so I tried to stay away from
Speaker 1: news like that and stuff, but when I saw it,
Speaker 1: like I was talking to Jennifer later on, I was like, man, man, like,
Speaker 1: I just I saw this news report, and like the
Speaker 1: people in the park are like Harley's age, and like
Speaker 1: look like Harley in terms of like they're not dressed
Speaker 1: like in rags, like they're dressed in shit to go
Speaker 1: to a club, but they fucking stop by MacArthur Park
Speaker 1: to get fucked up on fentanal and they're just like
Speaker 1: human zombies and shit. And I'm always like so appreciative
Speaker 1: that you never fell into like a drug hole or
Speaker 1: something where it's just like this is hard least three
Speaker 1: or something like that. Thank you for that, man, that
Speaker 1: fucking pure. Yeah, I mean good for you, yes, of course,
Speaker 1: But it's not even like so sad. It's so what
Speaker 1: can you do in a situation like that?
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, it's it's so fucking sad. I have definitely
Speaker 2: friends of friends who have passed from from Fenton on
Speaker 2: like the past year.
Speaker 1: Are you serious? Yeah, you know people have.
Speaker 2: Got friends of friends.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do you know I've never even smoked a cigarette?
Speaker 1: Good for you?
Speaker 2: Not once I've smoked a lot of weed, Let's be
Speaker 2: clear about that.
Speaker 1: But I've never smoked cigarettes. Is fucking dumb.
Speaker 2: While yeah, you, I feel like people who have parents
Speaker 2: that smoke, the kids are like no thanks to so
Speaker 2: you and mom walked, So I run.
Speaker 1: I put the cigarettes. I mean I didn't start smoking
Speaker 1: cigarettes until I was twenty three. It was right before
Speaker 1: I made clerks twenty two to twenty three, and then
Speaker 1: I stopped smoking at thirty eight. So I smoked for
Speaker 1: fifteen sixteen years. But it was so dumb, Like I
Speaker 1: wasn't really, but it was such a big part of
Speaker 1: like my like persona in the nineties, all of us
Speaker 1: like you know, ay man, we're going outside to smoke
Speaker 1: because fucking we can't not fucking smoke. Man.
Speaker 2: It's really a thing right now. It's like people my
Speaker 2: age go out to smoke. Well, just like I don't
Speaker 2: know if like everybody I know smokes, I'm like the
Speaker 2: only one that.
Speaker 1: Doesn't smoke cigarettes. Yeah, stay away from it. Number One,
Speaker 1: fucking stupid for your health. Number two so expensive. Now,
Speaker 1: Like when I was a cigarette smoker, smokes, we're like
Speaker 1: fucking four dollars a pack max. Now it's like ten
Speaker 1: twelve bucks a pack.
Speaker 2: Of smokes, Like, you know what zims are?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Those trouble fucking yeah, you don't fuck with them either.
Speaker 1: That's the I'm scared about anything you put in your
Speaker 1: mouth that's got like fucking nicotine.
Speaker 2: And like, and I've got friends who are fucking hooked
Speaker 2: on the bins and they're like, want one. I'm like,
Speaker 2: I don't know, I don't want to.
Speaker 1: I mean, look, I always used to be like, weeds
Speaker 1: enough for me or whatever, the fuck, But Celsius.
Speaker 2: You're really trying to secure Celsius.
Speaker 1: He had a whole container fridge full of Celsius. I'm like,
Speaker 1: what am I doing wrong?
Speaker 2: When you told me about that, I thought it was
Speaker 2: like some sort of vending machine sort of thing. But
Speaker 2: it's literally just a fridge for the Celsius logo filled
Speaker 2: with Celsius.
Speaker 1: Okay, I want all right, Passion Irration, this is the
Speaker 1: one I've been This is my favorite one of the week. Ready,
Speaker 1: Passion I Ration. Nipple work?
Speaker 2: What the fuck does not even mean.
Speaker 1: Nipple work? Does that mean nipple work? So the one
Speaker 1: works on one's nipple? What explain myself?
Speaker 2: Surgery? What are you talking about?
Speaker 1: I mean, not explaining to myself well in sex all right?
Speaker 2: Moving on and Raussian on our relationship. Rasian on hanging
Speaker 2: out with you.
Speaker 1: Wrote that I was dying.
Speaker 2: You were laughing, and I was like, what you'll see.
Speaker 1: Most people would say passion.
Speaker 2: But rational on the entire subject being brought up by
Speaker 2: my father.
Speaker 1: I've never heard those two words put together.
Speaker 2: I really was like, people get plastic surgery on their nipples.
Speaker 2: I'm just gone too far to.
Speaker 1: Have talk with that boyfriend. Here you go, passion what
Speaker 1: was called that? Passion rats? Anyways, submarines Wucky Wucky came
Speaker 1: over because he's like, I have thoughts about nipple work,
Speaker 1: because Wucky's got dangling nipples because she had a litter
Speaker 1: of puffs, so she got she got thoughts about nipple.
Speaker 2: Talking about Wucki's dangling nipples.
Speaker 1: Why she came to the table. She's like, I have thoughts.
Speaker 2: Look at me.
Speaker 1: She loves it when I nipples, when I like patter belly,
Speaker 1: I call that word nipples, I thought her.
Speaker 2: Moving on, bro passionate irration, submarines.
Speaker 1: Submarines, Yeah, is this a sex term? Like, I'm like
Speaker 1: nipple submarines. I mean, I guess I'm for the idea
Speaker 1: of not drowning in the.
Speaker 2: Ocean of being in one. Would you go in one.
Speaker 1: Like oh, passion, irration to go into a movie?
Speaker 2: Yeah, ration, Yeah, Yeah, I'll go.
Speaker 1: Into one at like Disney where I get into the note.
Speaker 2: That goes down, that goes down is going to kill us,
Speaker 2: the Nemo submarine that goes down.
Speaker 1: Literally, Yeah, I ain't into that fucking I mean, I've
Speaker 1: been in one or two. You you didn't Nana Pop
Speaker 1: bring you to one? And I feel like I went
Speaker 1: in one with you as a kid too.
Speaker 2: I don't think so.
Speaker 1: One hundred percent, bro, because I remember being like, sucks
Speaker 1: having a kid. You gotta do some stupid ass s.
Speaker 3: Cool.
Speaker 1: Well, you're like the porthole and I'm like, what it's
Speaker 1: gonna be about me again?
Speaker 2: And did you ask why I've been in therapy since
Speaker 2: I was twelve and there? Yeah, sure you have it.
Speaker 2: My father is a glory child.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm hardly wanted to do so, but I won't
Speaker 1: go to buffet. Why can't we do both? Why can't
Speaker 1: we go my first? If we got them, a man
Speaker 1: would care about being on sub much. I'm hurry the water, like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god, her older brother. That's
Speaker 1: her older father.
Speaker 2: That's my dad.
Speaker 1: Thoughts about being on a sub sucks, thoughts about.
Speaker 2: Summaries, and.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm passionate about if. Look if I'm a point
Speaker 1: nemo passion, so submarine passion.
Speaker 2: No way you want in a real submarine.
Speaker 1: I don't. You don't think I've ever been on a summary?
Speaker 2: No, I don't think you have.
Speaker 1: Bro, I'm fifty four. I assure you I've been on
Speaker 1: a submarine, maybe not like you US nuclear tactical submarine.
Speaker 2: Are you sure you're not mistaking for the Disneyland one.
Speaker 1: I've been on that, but I've also been on one
Speaker 1: when you were a kid. I was in one where
Speaker 1: fucking I guess why or whatever. We were in Hawaii
Speaker 1: together exactly twice, I believe, no one time one time,
Speaker 1: and I believe we were in a fucking sub because
Speaker 1: I have pictures, and I also have the memory of
Speaker 1: being like, what if what if the breaks? I mean
Speaker 1: this was years before the Titans Perciful incident and ship
Speaker 1: a curve. And as much as I was like what
Speaker 1: if this breaks.
Speaker 2: Oh, it's so fu Yeah it's it's US. Submarines are
Speaker 2: It's scary, no shit.
Speaker 1: But I mean that one wasn't because it was literally
Speaker 1: like you know, fucking I to out the top ever
Speaker 1: left the surface quite like the Disney one, and there
Speaker 1: was like a boat like on the water bottom and ship.
Speaker 2: Oh you're just talking about like being on the surface.
Speaker 1: But you go down. It's a sub that goes on here,
Speaker 1: but it doesn't completely.
Speaker 2: Doesn't descend all the way down. James Cameron, there was
Speaker 2: one that I would go on with Nan and Pa
Speaker 2: that went like over one hundred feet down really, And
Speaker 2: that's what I just thought you were saying you've been
Speaker 2: on and I was like, there is no fucking away
Speaker 2: that you would do that.
Speaker 1: But you'd be surprised. I was dragged into some shit
Speaker 1: I would never do or choose to.
Speaker 2: Do, because you're a stupid kid.
Speaker 1: I would have dumb ass kids who wants to see
Speaker 1: and learn about.
Speaker 2: Life, my dumb ass kids.
Speaker 1: Honestly, thank god you came along. You were a welcome
Speaker 1: distraction from myself. It's like, oh, I have to care
Speaker 1: about something else.
Speaker 2: Now imagine you without a kid, Oh.
Speaker 1: Help us all I mean, I might have been king
Speaker 1: of the world, nothing to hold me back, nothing to
Speaker 1: show me my own humanity. I'd be a soulis fucking vessel.
Speaker 2: Of you think you think is scary, childless, Count Smith
Speaker 2: is scarier.
Speaker 1: What is the exact It's something like in the depths
Speaker 1: of Riley.
Speaker 2: I didn't even know he was asleep.
Speaker 1: Lies sleeping quote. Yeah, he's he's asleep, and when he
Speaker 1: wakes up, we're all fucked.
Speaker 2: I know it was like that.
Speaker 1: Here are some quotes referred to the most merciful thing
Speaker 1: in the world, the oldest and strongest emotion in the
Speaker 1: house there it is, dude, in the house of Really,
Speaker 1: yet I don't know how to pronounce it. Really a
Speaker 1: mm hmm, really a dead cthulhu waits dreaming.
Speaker 2: That's pretty fire m hmm, dead waits dreaming fire quote Right.
Speaker 1: Most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the
Speaker 1: inability of the human mind to correlate all of its contents.
Speaker 1: I have looked upon all the universe has to hold
Speaker 1: of horror, and even the skies of spring and flowers
Speaker 1: of summer must ever, afterward be poisoned to.
Speaker 2: Me, God damn.
Speaker 1: A brief primer on HP Lovecraft's most enduring creation in
Speaker 1: the House of How do you pronounced that? We'll look
Speaker 1: it up. Riley Dead Cthulhu Waite dreaming. It is more
Speaker 1: or less impossible to avoid the adjective love Craftian when
Speaker 1: reading Horror, which to come across some vague mention of Cthulhu.
Speaker 1: I mean, Cthulhu is his version of Leviathon. Leviathon is
Speaker 1: the sea beast from the Bible and whatnot, like a
Speaker 1: fucking I think in the Old Desmond Genesis that you know,
Speaker 1: when God creates the fucking heavens, the earth's and all
Speaker 1: the beasts and shit, he creates the Leviathon, their two
Speaker 1: male and female, that he slaughters the female and salts
Speaker 1: it for the righteous to eat, you know, in a meal.
Speaker 1: Because I know, because that's not fair. Come because I
Speaker 1: had the two Leviathan made it, it would unmake the world?
Speaker 2: Was the lady one gotta go?
Speaker 1: I I didn't ask any rabbis because this comes from
Speaker 1: the Old Testament. This comes from a Testament sold it's
Speaker 1: it's Genesis, the first book of the Bible. But I'm
Speaker 1: not quite sure. Well, I'll hazard a guess. Maybe the
Speaker 1: world's been a little patriarchal up.
Speaker 2: Now there's this thing called misogyny.
Speaker 1: I gotta remember that quote in the house. How do
Speaker 1: you pronounce Riley pronunciation pronunciation lulu. Oh right, what here
Speaker 1: we go? Yeah, I know many people say that we
Speaker 1: wanted apparently I have done this once before.
Speaker 7: Yeah, we are looking at how to pronounce this name.
Speaker 7: We're gonna be looking at how to say more confusing
Speaker 7: names that too many people do seem to struggle with
Speaker 7: and miss pronouns as well.
Speaker 1: So make sure the stadium.
Speaker 7: Yeah yeah, I know many people say it as as well.
Speaker 1: Or yeah really yeah yeah really yeah, how do you
Speaker 1: pronounce it yourself? Let us know in the comments.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was really like leading up to that moment.
Speaker 1: I mean, you could have gotten that don five seconds,
Speaker 1: but it was like today we will talk about a
Speaker 1: word that has never been talked about before. Many people
Speaker 1: kind of pronounce, but I will pronunce it here, and
Speaker 1: you will leave the word the word is, but first
Speaker 1: a word from our sponsors. It cleans your eyes. The
Speaker 1: word is. Now I've even forgot how to say it,
Speaker 1: really yeah, really yeah.
Speaker 3: We're gonna come through this again really.
Speaker 1: Really yeah yeah really yeah really yeah really.
Speaker 2: Yeah really yeah that sounds.
Speaker 1: So let's go back to that and really yeah really yeah,
Speaker 1: I remember how to say it really yeah, really yeah
Speaker 1: yeah really really yeah, really, yeah, really in the house
Speaker 1: at really yeh dead Cuthulhu Waite streaming kind of sucking dope.
Speaker 1: There's lyrics for the next song in the House of really. Honestly,
Speaker 1: it's to get up now, man.
Speaker 2: I can't think of single thing that could hard.
Speaker 1: Time to start, man, just to go to school.
Speaker 2: It's to start, Oh my god, and.
Speaker 1: Turn it into a fucking kid that's gotta figure it
Speaker 1: out at high school. I love I'm a high schooler,
Speaker 1: but I'm also Clulu And yeah right, let's make that
Speaker 1: cartoon and maybe makes money.
Speaker 2: That sounds that sounds like a winner to me. I
Speaker 2: would watch it.
Speaker 1: Cuteulu. All right, Wait, we didn't finish our lessons? Okay,
Speaker 1: passion or ration? Was it me? I said, nipple work
Speaker 1: and then you said, then you.
Speaker 2: Said, then I pivoted with submarines.
Speaker 1: Weird poll. All right, here's mine, young Hollywood passionate ration. Well,
Speaker 1: Hollywood is really we're dark, we're dead dead dreaming about
Speaker 1: this business. Use me a lot of money, a lot
Speaker 1: of work, well not so much. Really, it's really it
Speaker 1: sucks up in this business for young Hollywood passion.
Speaker 2: God, it's it's it's tough to say, you know, young
Speaker 2: Hollywood is a mixed bag. There's some there's some cool
Speaker 2: people in there, and then there's some people waiting on
Speaker 2: the outskirts like myself, and then there's uh, and then
Speaker 2: there's some like people that fucking suck. So I don't know,
Speaker 2: just like any other group of people. So it's a
Speaker 2: mixed bag. I would have to say.
Speaker 1: That it's a binary question. So passion, Yeah, streaming, what's
Speaker 1: the first part? Something? And where? And really that's the
Speaker 1: yes in the house a really the house even more metal?
Speaker 1: What the house?
Speaker 2: What does that mean?
Speaker 1: What is that way? Streaming? The house of Really? You
Speaker 1: gotta read some love craft.
Speaker 2: I'd probably.
Speaker 1: I will rush us. Yeah, yeah, I say I have
Speaker 1: a passion for old Hollywood. Me what's what do you got?
Speaker 1: What's next?
Speaker 2: Mmmmm, let me see you, let me see, let me see.
Speaker 2: My list seems to end there. It seems to have
Speaker 2: gotten distracted while writing my list. M care bears Ration
Speaker 2: look at.
Speaker 1: Her on my phone rah rah in the eighties when
Speaker 1: I first experienced them. Ration years later, why that's not
Speaker 1: my king, not my king, I.
Speaker 2: Wouldn't say it's my kink either.
Speaker 1: It's on your phone, bro, They're so cute.
Speaker 2: You got little symbol, but.
Speaker 1: It's a binary equation and I can't passion them. I
Speaker 1: feel no passion for them.
Speaker 2: Okay, fine, in.
Speaker 1: The house of reallyah, in the house of really yeah,
Speaker 1: dead care bears, lie dreaming, what the okay? And uh?
Speaker 1: What do I got for a final passion or ration?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: No, I don't know why I wrote Katy Perry. Yeah
Speaker 1: she was in the news here. No. We like Katy
Speaker 1: Perry for talking on the telephone. Passionate ration, of.
Speaker 2: Course, interchangeable. I love talking on the phone.
Speaker 1: You do, yeah, passionate passion ration? Why just staying into it?
Speaker 2: I like it better than texting.
Speaker 1: We differ whoa in the house of really we differ
Speaker 1: dead lies, dreaming? Yeah, fucking I'm uh. I'm my generation.
Speaker 1: When we were kids, all we did is talking text
Speaker 1: like this. Do you feel I do that?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: You do?
Speaker 2: Yes, you text with one.
Speaker 1: Thinger Sometimes you don't alone.
Speaker 2: You're like, what are you trying to chase the ball?
Speaker 1: That's how you text hello?
Speaker 2: Because I said your name. Your text can be scary
Speaker 2: sometimes because you like text actually properly was correct, like punctuation,
Speaker 2: And I'm like, oh fuck, is he mad? And then
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, No, he's just he's just proper. He's
Speaker 2: just proper.
Speaker 1: I have started leaving the period off for that reason
Speaker 1: so people feel.
Speaker 2: More, oh my god, when you texted the period, I'm like,
Speaker 2: what the fuck did I do?
Speaker 1: Like, oh my god, how how weird?
Speaker 2: You're like, it's so scary.
Speaker 1: Using proper grammar and structure, he must be angry about
Speaker 1: something scary. I'm a writer. It's a medium that I
Speaker 1: was prepared for when I entered.
Speaker 2: I like talking on the phone because you can hear.
Speaker 2: You can hear how somebody's tone. There's no misreading the
Speaker 2: tone in the text.
Speaker 1: I grew up talking on the phone. We would spend
Speaker 1: hours bro and there'd be one phone line in the house,
Speaker 1: so you would tie up the phone line and your
Speaker 1: parents would be like, get off the phone. You'd be
Speaker 1: like all right, all right, and you'd be on for
Speaker 1: another like twenty minutes. Then Mamally'd come in really angry,
Speaker 1: like I'm hanging up.
Speaker 2: And you're like, all right, I go go by interaction
Speaker 2: that is featured in the four thirty movie in theaters
Speaker 2: now right, you can see it.
Speaker 1: It's a very good point. Excellent point. Yes, lots of
Speaker 1: nice notices for your Boyfriend and the movie and joy
Speaker 1: for you. Yes, but Austin did a great job people
Speaker 1: really seeing it and being like, hey.
Speaker 2: You both did a great job.
Speaker 1: But you're right that movie opens with a long ass
Speaker 1: conversation and that that was us back in the day
Speaker 1: and nowadays fifty four like, I couldn't imagine being on
Speaker 1: the phone that long.
Speaker 2: I love it. Yeah, I'm always trying to talk on
Speaker 2: the phone where I'm driving, and Austin's always like, Okay,
Speaker 2: i'll see you soon.
Speaker 1: I can do that. But even then, I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I like it. I mean, it's good to hear. Fucking
Speaker 1: I thought your generation was all about, like I'm putting
Speaker 1: you on read.
Speaker 2: When I try to call you go straight to voicemail.
Speaker 1: So what I just do that DN D, But I
Speaker 1: can take I think I've taken you off my D
Speaker 1: and D list, So you.
Speaker 2: My fucking every single time I try to call you,
Speaker 2: it's like ring and it goes to your voicemail, and
Speaker 2: I'm like, I.
Speaker 1: Don't live by the phone, man, like I learned. Once
Speaker 1: I learned how to do D and D, I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, what a game changer is Now I
Speaker 1: could work without like ping pink, pink, pink, pink, pink,
Speaker 1: pink pink, ping, rickchet rabbit. You don't even know that cartoon?
Speaker 1: Do you anna? Barbara cartoon back in the day, Ping ping, ping,
Speaker 1: ricochet rabbit.
Speaker 2: Ah, that sounds cute.
Speaker 1: It all sounds cute. Did you finish yours? Do you
Speaker 1: have your last passion ration?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: We did it. Yeah, we completed kids. We finished the thing.
Speaker 1: It only took us oh an hour and a half,
Speaker 1: but we got there. There's a lot of content for
Speaker 1: a free show man. You like what you hear? Tell
Speaker 1: people subscribe? Kid? The other day was like, do we
Speaker 1: have to tell the two subscribe? Do you think this works? Check?
Speaker 1: I didn't know. I was like, yeah, you get out
Speaker 1: in your socials. You beg people to subscribe, leave nice reviews. Yes,
Speaker 1: that's all she cares about. You think we are at
Speaker 1: four point nine and we just I just don't want
Speaker 1: to be at work.
Speaker 2: Someone reew bro.
Speaker 1: I'm shocked down. All mean man fucking people. Some people
Speaker 1: like here two people having a good ass time. That sucks.
Speaker 1: Find out they're related. They hate that even more.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so true.
Speaker 1: What are you gonna do? Not do it? Because sometimes
Speaker 1: people are like here, your control, get out of your system.
Speaker 1: You're done. True, we'll be here having a good time. Passion,
Speaker 1: Passion for having a good time, ration for your comments.
Speaker 2: True.
Speaker 1: There it is kids for beardless dickless me.
Speaker 2: I'm Kevin Smith and I'm Harley Quinn Smith.
Speaker 1: I have a beardless dickless day. This has been a
Speaker 1: podcast production some podcast podcast using our mouths on you
Speaker 1: since two thousand and seven.