WEBVTT NOTE This file was generated by Descript 00:00:10.800 --> 00:00:12.339 There we are. 00:00:13.460 --> 00:00:13.909 Boom. 00:00:15.800 --> 00:00:17.359 There's the cup. 00:00:18.790 --> 00:00:19.539 Looking good. 00:00:19.539 --> 00:00:23.669 Daniel, thanks so much for being a part of the Transformative Leadership Summit. 00:00:23.669 --> 00:00:36.269 Working with you on creating this has been awesome, and I'm really excited that I get to interview you as a guest for it as well, because I know you've got a lot of value to bring. 00:00:36.640 --> 00:00:52.990 So when we talked about what you could do, um, you talked about some of the changes that are going on in your school, and how the power that you've been able to have in your school is having people, um, feel safe, and building relationships with them. 00:00:53.479 --> 00:01:06.470 So right now you're assistant principal at Brooks High School in Chicago, and, um, you are also the host of the Better Leaders, Better Schools podcast, and the, um... 00:01:07.240 --> 00:01:08.869 You're also doing the... There you go. 00:01:08.869 --> 00:01:09.249 There's the mug. 00:01:09.249 --> 00:01:09.999 Bring it back in. 00:01:10.139 --> 00:01:10.630 That's right. 00:01:11.310 --> 00:01:22.669 And, uh, it's, it's just awesome to be able to work with you, and I always learn something from you, so thank you so much for now letting me interview you as the guest for the Transformative Leadership Summit. 00:01:23.550 --> 00:01:26.849 Yeah, you know, I've been, uh, really looking forward to this, Jethro. 00:01:26.849 --> 00:01:29.610 I just wanna thank you so much, uh, for inviting me. 00:01:30.099 --> 00:01:34.300 Uh, one, for the interview, and two, you know, to partner with you on this idea. 00:01:34.300 --> 00:01:42.770 Uh, I just, I love what you're doing with, uh, Transformative Principal and, you know, we're developing a relationship, so, uh, uh, I feel connected to you. 00:01:42.770 --> 00:01:47.199 We talk about being brothers from different mothers, and I think this is just gonna be a lot of fun. 00:01:47.199 --> 00:01:50.849 You know, the, the idea of this summit is to, uh, empower and equip people. 00:01:51.190 --> 00:01:53.230 Um, and we're doing that for free, right? 00:01:53.230 --> 00:01:55.580 During the, uh, while the summit is going on. 00:01:55.580 --> 00:02:05.720 And then of course if, if people get just such incredible value, they can always, uh, keep those videos and invest in them, and, you know, you'll share the details with that. 00:02:05.720 --> 00:02:09.840 But this is just a wild ride and we got a lot to talk about, so thanks for having me. 00:02:10.209 --> 00:02:10.800 I'm honored. 00:02:11.129 --> 00:02:14.270 Well, I'm, I'm honored to have you as part of my team. 00:02:14.270 --> 00:02:15.260 It sure is awesome. 00:02:15.760 --> 00:02:24.709 So let's talk about, um, why it is that we need to value relationships and build those relationships first and foremost. 00:02:25.040 --> 00:02:33.490 We've all heard that a million times, relationships matter, but talk about how it actually works in real life and why that's so important. 00:02:34.570 --> 00:02:41.240 Yeah, you know, by the time these videos are released, uh, there'll be changes that have occurred at my school. 00:02:41.720 --> 00:02:55.440 And, you know, currently actually the, the principal shared yesterday, uh, so we're, we're talking in June right now, mid-June, and- Uh, he, he talked about a really awesome opportunity for him, and I'm glad he's taking it. 00:02:55.810 --> 00:03:01.499 Uh, he's gonna have the ability to serve a community at a much larger scale as a community superintendent. 00:03:01.999 --> 00:03:16.059 Um, but, you know, we've put four or five years, uh, deeply into the school we're at now, and we've worked so hard on personalized learning, standards-based grading, uh, operating as a professional learning community. 00:03:16.669 --> 00:03:25.399 And when people heard the news when he shared it with them, uh, you saw a little bit of fear, uh, on people's faces. 00:03:25.820 --> 00:03:29.519 They were scared because the natural question to ask is, what is next? 00:03:30.140 --> 00:03:44.960 And from that, not necessarily, like, bad fallout, but, like, the repercussions of, of saying the leader is, is now transitioning, uh, it was interesting to see how people responded, and they would run to me and the other assistant principal wanting to know what's next. 00:03:45.480 --> 00:04:03.140 Uh, and that's what shared, you know, just kinda like you had the curtain there and you pulled it back and showed me, you know, "There's everybody, there's bookcases back there in the kitchen and stuff." But listen, when we pulled back the curtain there, um, it, it's just, it's really about people wanna know that are, am I gonna be taken care of? 00:04:03.140 --> 00:04:05.540 Is this gonna be a safe environment for me? 00:04:05.909 --> 00:04:07.809 Uh, what kinda change is next? 00:04:08.210 --> 00:04:18.419 And the principal recommended that, uh, our vice principal, Shanee Jackson, uh, continue to lead the school, and I th- I know that's the right choice, and that's because she's a, a wonderful leader. 00:04:18.419 --> 00:04:24.439 She's, uh, equipped, um, you know, very intelligent, and she knows everyone, and she knows what we're trying to do. 00:04:24.470 --> 00:04:32.650 The worst thing to do would be to bring out some rock star or whatever, somebody with an incredible resume that doesn't know the community. 00:04:33.089 --> 00:04:40.250 Um, you know, it... I would understand that if there wasn't a viable option there, but, uh, there is. 00:04:40.250 --> 00:04:45.739 And so it just showed me, you know, 'cause people were saying, "Here's wh- here's what I hope happens. 00:04:45.739 --> 00:04:48.430 Here's what I appreciate about your leadership," and all of that. 00:04:48.769 --> 00:05:00.129 And it just, it really hit home in my gut because this, this change is happening and everybody is amped up with their emotions, that, uh, connections really are what matters the most. 00:05:00.760 --> 00:05:01.019 Yeah. 00:05:01.049 --> 00:05:06.820 And when somebody leaves, it's, it's a natural part of the educational system. 00:05:06.820 --> 00:05:12.430 We're always gonna have people who are- Right ... coming and going, and every year there's going to be turnover. 00:05:12.829 --> 00:05:15.859 And some years there may be very little, and some years there may be a lot. 00:05:16.299 --> 00:05:28.889 But what we need to do is prepare in a relationship way for that change to happen, and make sure we have those relationships in place so that we can weather through that change and have a good experience still. 00:05:29.635 --> 00:05:31.915 Right, and, and you're absolutely right. 00:05:31.915 --> 00:05:47.654 And, you know, as of this recording, we had told our, our, our board and also our local school council, which is, you know, made up of parents, community members, uh, teachers, administration, uh, that we want Shenay to, to take the helm. 00:05:48.144 --> 00:05:52.484 Uh, and within that, you know, again, it's all about that fluidity. 00:05:52.484 --> 00:06:00.865 They, she knows the community and all of that, and we really hope that they make that decision because it's gonna be what's, uh, best for kids. 00:06:01.325 --> 00:06:06.884 But again, it just goes back to why those relationships are so important, 'cause she knows everybody. 00:06:06.884 --> 00:06:08.055 She knows them all by name. 00:06:08.055 --> 00:06:09.285 She knows their kids. 00:06:09.485 --> 00:06:10.595 She knows their strengths. 00:06:10.595 --> 00:06:12.114 She knows their weaknesses. 00:06:12.494 --> 00:06:25.154 Uh, and then the other key too is when we transition, and this is a challenge to all the leaders participating in this summit right now, watching us, uh, a- and are you building some type of succession plan? 00:06:25.404 --> 00:06:29.285 Because, you know, maybe you're gonna be there forever, and that's great if you are. 00:06:29.285 --> 00:06:31.954 I think it's wonderful to plant roots and stay in a community. 00:06:32.325 --> 00:06:44.934 Uh, but if you have other desires too to either move up into the central office, uh, or try to, you know, lead a different district at some point, it is imperative that you are building into your people for that next step. 00:06:44.934 --> 00:06:51.165 If you're not, shame on you, 'cause when you leave, you're gonna leave, uh, not necessarily a disaster, right? 00:06:51.165 --> 00:06:54.684 But it's gonna be much harder for the whole community to rebound. 00:06:55.104 --> 00:07:07.415 And one of the things that really struck me when D'Andre, uh, was talking about, uh, his new opportunity is that he feels so confident again with Shenay 'cause she's there, but the, also the leadership team. 00:07:07.415 --> 00:07:13.165 There's 10, 12 people representing all the departments, uh, and, and they know the work. 00:07:13.165 --> 00:07:13.805 They get it. 00:07:13.805 --> 00:07:19.474 They've been doing this for four or five years, and it just needs to continue and continue to improve. 00:07:19.765 --> 00:07:21.705 It doesn't have to be a massive change. 00:07:21.955 --> 00:07:36.184 And so there is such a strong foundation at that wonderful school, Brooks College Prep, and I just, I just hope everyone, uh, makes the right decision, uh, and, you know, bets on relationships, bets on continuity, and that we can keep this work going. 00:07:36.904 --> 00:07:40.375 Yeah, and I messed up and called it Brooks High School, and it's Brooks College Prep. 00:07:40.375 --> 00:07:42.235 I knew that and just said it wrong, so. 00:07:42.235 --> 00:07:43.154 Hey, we're a high school too. 00:07:43.154 --> 00:07:44.214 It's okay, you know? 00:07:44.335 --> 00:07:44.625 Yeah. 00:07:44.994 --> 00:07:52.115 So, uh, you know, one of the things that we want people to get out of this summit is that, um, you need to take action. 00:07:52.164 --> 00:07:53.785 So give me a, a 00:07:54.015 --> 00:08:04.634 What can a principal do to create a succession plan that is a simple, "Here's what you need to do next week to make sure that you've got a succession plan in place"? 00:08:05.464 --> 00:08:13.544 I think the first thing, uh, would be to just be extremely, uh, to be rigorously honest with yourself. 00:08:13.994 --> 00:08:24.285 If you trust the people that you hired on your administrative team to, to, uh, pass the ball to, so to speak, uh, if you, if you do, you're great. 00:08:24.925 --> 00:08:31.945 And you need to start finding opportunities for them to lead in new and challenging ways so that they can be ready to take that step. 00:08:32.235 --> 00:08:34.445 If you don't, ask yourself why. 00:08:34.474 --> 00:08:38.584 Is it because they just lack those experiences and now you need to find them? 00:08:39.275 --> 00:08:52.234 Or if they're the right, or excuse me, the wrong fit, which is possible, are you taking the steps to either, uh, coach them, are they, are they coachable, or do they need to go somewhere else? 00:08:52.365 --> 00:08:59.455 And don't be a big wimp about it and not give people the feedback and move them on if, if they're not the right fit. 00:08:59.824 --> 00:09:09.835 So often we have the wrong people in our schools because the leader doesn't do what he or she needs to do if, you know, for what's best for the community. 00:09:10.194 --> 00:09:16.115 So it's either a thing where you're giving them more experiences and you're coaching them, giving them that feedback. 00:09:16.554 --> 00:09:19.725 Uh, don't be afraid to allow them to fail and learn from mistakes. 00:09:19.725 --> 00:09:22.804 Don't be a micromanager, but give them those experiences. 00:09:23.275 --> 00:09:28.655 Or, uh, if it's not the right fit, you need to do something about it yesterday. 00:09:29.464 --> 00:09:30.674 Yeah, absolutely. 00:09:30.704 --> 00:09:31.735 That is so vital. 00:09:32.185 --> 00:09:40.634 Um, let's talk a little bit about how, um, you, you mentioned to me about, uh, Brene Brown's How We Carry People. 00:09:40.665 --> 00:09:40.725 Yeah. 00:09:40.725 --> 00:09:46.884 And talk about how that helps you build those relationships so that you've got a powerhouse school. 00:09:47.765 --> 00:09:52.384 Yeah, if you guys don't know Brene Brown, I mean, s- I look up to her so much. 00:09:52.384 --> 00:09:56.805 She talks a lot about transparency and vulnerability. 00:09:56.805 --> 00:10:04.165 She is a researcher out of, uh, Houston, and, and she talks a lot about guilt and shame and how that impacts people. 00:10:04.545 --> 00:10:11.845 And I was telling Jethro earlier before we recorded, I'm currently listening to the audio version of her text, Rising Strong. 00:10:12.384 --> 00:10:15.574 There's so many, so many wonderful parts about that book. 00:10:15.935 --> 00:10:24.494 But I wanna share one phrase and, and short story to challenge leaders, and guys, listen, or I should say y'all. 00:10:24.494 --> 00:10:26.595 She said y'all is more gender friendly. 00:10:26.595 --> 00:10:30.134 So I say guys, I'm from the Midwest, I know not all guys are listening. 00:10:30.604 --> 00:10:37.164 But she shares a story of saying yes to a speaking gig that she shouldn't have said yes to. 00:10:37.414 --> 00:10:39.714 Uh, and she was very frustrated about it. 00:10:40.005 --> 00:10:47.524 Uh, it was in a, you know, the, the distance, the, the traveling wasn't a big deal, but the problem was she had to bunk up with somebody. 00:10:48.095 --> 00:10:51.735 And she likes, she prefers, and I think probably a lot of us would like our own room. 00:10:52.304 --> 00:10:58.755 Uh, when she told the organizers about that, they said, you know, they, they, they shamed her into, "What? 00:10:58.755 --> 00:11:06.964 You're so good that you need your own room?" And so she, even though she had that boundary set, "I need my own room," she still said yes, and bunked with someone. 00:11:06.964 --> 00:11:09.185 So knock, knock, knock on the door. 00:11:09.584 --> 00:11:23.910 "Come in," the person says, and she comes in, and this, this lady is eating, uh, I don't know if it was a wolfong, Jethro, or it was some type of dessert With, with, uh, you know, icing all over and that sort of thing. 00:11:24.300 --> 00:11:29.520 And the lady's like, "Oh, pardon me. You know, I'd shake your hand, but I've got glazing all over my hand." 00:11:29.890 --> 00:11:39.850 And so what she does to Brené's horror and to mine, 'cause I'm a neat freak, I love my hands clean, she wipes her hands on the furniture, right? 00:11:40.239 --> 00:11:44.979 Not, not on a... She doesn't wash them, even though there's a sink obviously in the, in the hotel. 00:11:44.979 --> 00:11:47.930 She wipes them on the furniture, then looks at her hands. 00:11:47.930 --> 00:11:53.829 They're still dirty, so she wipes some more on the hotel's furniture to then shake your hand. 00:11:54.219 --> 00:11:56.239 And Brené keeps telling the story, you know. 00:11:56.420 --> 00:11:58.760 It's obviously a non-smoking environment. 00:11:58.820 --> 00:12:07.949 The lady's smoking on the patio, and she tries to challenge her there, and she's just like, "Whatever." So Brené brings this... She, she, she gives her speech. 00:12:07.949 --> 00:12:16.469 She leaves, you know, as quickly as possible, and she tells her therapist this story, and she's talking about how bad this person is. 00:12:16.469 --> 00:12:18.550 They're a, they're a terrible person. 00:12:19.140 --> 00:12:28.129 And the therapist, you know, in, in a therapist way just listens, doesn't necessarily offer a comment. 00:12:28.500 --> 00:12:35.659 Brené is obviously judging this woman, and we can all understand why, and she asks this question, and this is what I want leaders to ask. 00:12:37.019 --> 00:12:42.530 She says, "Do you believe that this person was trying their best?" 00:12:43.540 --> 00:12:44.350 Oh my gosh. 00:12:44.989 --> 00:13:03.519 And she started thinking about that, and after a long time of really considering it and talking to her friends or whatever, she really got to a place where she now believes that people, despite how they perform, let's say in our schools, 'cause we're school leaders, that they are giving their best. 00:13:03.890 --> 00:13:09.650 And the implications of that as a leader are, are tremendous because I'll be quite honest. 00:13:09.650 --> 00:13:23.710 There, um, there's a, there's a teacher I've worked with, and I'll just say in one of my buildings so that I don't give it away too much, but believe me, i- in my judgmental way, I have evidence that she's one of the worst teachers I've ever seen. 00:13:24.140 --> 00:13:38.250 But the problem is when I s- start, uh, disliking her as a person, when I stop, stop giving her the benefit of the doubt, and it's, it's, it's not, it's not the person that I should dislike. 00:13:38.250 --> 00:13:40.319 It should be the behaviors that they're doing. 00:13:40.319 --> 00:13:43.959 If they're late to work, let's talk about that, you know? 00:13:44.149 --> 00:13:48.539 But let me not tell a whole story of why, 'cause they don't care about the kids. 00:13:48.780 --> 00:13:50.959 They don't care about the job, you know. 00:13:51.380 --> 00:13:55.979 Uh, heavens forbid that they disrespect me as the leader, and that's why they come late to work. 00:13:56.309 --> 00:14:03.130 And so and, and the lateness was just, believe me, the, the, the, uh, foundation of this person's poor behavior. 00:14:03.130 --> 00:14:04.160 They, they can't teach. 00:14:04.160 --> 00:14:05.809 They're never prepared, et cetera, et cetera. 00:14:06.240 --> 00:14:24.695 But if I were to ask myself that question, is she giving her best, and my friend DeAndre too, the principal, he said, "Hurt people hurt people." If I started looking at this- teacher like that, I would have so much more empathy and maybe a little more patience. 00:14:24.735 --> 00:14:30.605 I would still have those hard conversations and ultimately have to let her go, which we did. 00:14:31.164 --> 00:14:36.695 But it would've been so much better for my heart and for our relationship. 00:14:37.135 --> 00:14:49.835 'Cause I, I, even though I try to hide it, you know, and people call me the zen master, they can't read my face sometimes, I know there's things that I give off when I don't necessarily appreciate that person and what they add to our community. 00:14:50.335 --> 00:14:54.284 So that's the thing I want people to walk away with from this session. 00:14:54.685 --> 00:14:57.644 Do you believe that people are giving their best? 00:14:57.644 --> 00:15:05.234 And if they are, you know, how does that, uh, challenge you in terms of how you interact with them? 00:15:06.504 --> 00:15:14.925 So the real value there, I think, is assuming that they are giving their best, whether or not there is any evidence of that, right? 00:15:15.435 --> 00:15:18.955 And who are we really to judge whether they are or not? 00:15:19.324 --> 00:15:28.314 The reality is, is we should just assume they are when we are in a leadership position, unless they can tell us that they're not, right? 00:15:29.244 --> 00:15:29.424 Yeah. 00:15:29.424 --> 00:15:36.634 You know, and I think the fear is that, uh, we're gonna get hurt in the process or some, some type of negative outcome will happen. 00:15:37.174 --> 00:15:41.504 But the... you know, don't let fear guide what you do. 00:15:41.534 --> 00:15:47.265 I mean, if you assume they're doing their best, what could be the implications of that, the consequences of that? 00:15:47.265 --> 00:15:49.235 They're only gonna be extremely positive. 00:15:49.235 --> 00:15:53.064 What kind of culture could you build if you had that type of mentality? 00:15:53.104 --> 00:15:55.454 So that's, it's really a great challenge to me. 00:15:55.454 --> 00:16:02.504 And you know, I think it's a, a, a demonstration, too, of, of grace and patience and compassion, and we all need it. 00:16:02.534 --> 00:16:05.994 Uh, Jethro, you know I'm going through a challenging time as of this recording. 00:16:06.394 --> 00:16:13.865 And even though I'm working very hard, uh, it's... I've had a higher capacity for work in the past. 00:16:14.074 --> 00:16:16.845 So I'm definitely giving my best right now. 00:16:17.165 --> 00:16:22.994 Um, but compared to my best, let's say a year ago, it's a, it's a lower value, right? 00:16:23.365 --> 00:16:30.444 Uh, but it really means a lot to me that people aren't treating me differently, that they still think I'm the same amazing guy. 00:16:30.444 --> 00:16:33.994 And so I in turn wanna, uh, give that to others as well. 00:16:34.694 --> 00:16:34.914 Right. 00:16:34.914 --> 00:16:45.944 And I'm sure that those who, as, as soon as you've told them you're struggling or as soon as you hear someone is struggling, your empathy shoots through the roof, right? 00:16:45.944 --> 00:16:46.145 Right. 00:16:46.224 --> 00:16:51.645 Because you're like, "Oh, I didn't realize that this happened." You know? 00:16:51.645 --> 00:16:58.824 And in the interview, um, with, uh, um, Justin Bader, that, uh, uh- Sure. 00:16:58.824 --> 00:17:06.104 Sure ... is part of this summit, he talked about a teacher that he was doing an observation on, and her dog had just died the night before. 00:17:06.295 --> 00:17:06.824 Mm-hmm. 00:17:07.564 --> 00:17:11.594 Yeah, she's not gonna be her best that, the day after her dog died. 00:17:11.945 --> 00:17:32.705 Um, and he's, he's gonna have empathy and say, "You know what? Let's just redo this observation. We don't need to, to go back and make you feel guilty about this and that other thing." And so I think the, the challenge here from, from the story from Brené Brown is do that ahead of time and don't wait, right? 00:17:32.785 --> 00:17:32.844 Yeah. 00:17:33.045 --> 00:17:47.615 So what, what are some of your pieces of advice for people to do that ahead of time when maybe they haven't done that in the past and they don't really want to be forgiving and kind and understanding because they're still really frustrated with this person? 00:17:48.394 --> 00:17:53.694 How do we as leaders start doing that when we haven't done it before? 00:17:53.914 --> 00:17:54.725 Where do we need to start? 00:17:56.245 --> 00:17:56.604 Phew. 00:17:57.304 --> 00:18:06.984 You know, that, that kinda thing is like a, you know, a, a very deep question that you have to work on yourself and you have to start getting really curious. 00:18:06.984 --> 00:18:14.045 That's another phrase she uses that I like a lot, uh, regarding people and situations that make us upset. 00:18:14.445 --> 00:18:27.835 But then, you know, if this message is resonating with you and you know you need to make a change, you gotta get curious about why you have this type of, uh, you know, feature, I guess, in your personality. 00:18:28.335 --> 00:18:30.555 Um, and start asking yourself some questions. 00:18:30.555 --> 00:18:34.324 But the other thing too is you can't, you can't do it on your own. 00:18:34.365 --> 00:18:48.784 So I'm sorry, like, you know, viewers, I don't necessarily have, you know, wake up, meditate for 15 minutes, uh, give yourself an inner bath, which people call, you know, drinking a glass of water and eat healthy and all this. 00:18:49.134 --> 00:18:55.394 Um, I don't have any tips or tricks on necessarily how to, how to change that mentality by yourself. 00:18:56.045 --> 00:18:59.985 But what I can say is if you do it in a community, right? 00:19:00.254 --> 00:19:03.144 So if you're willing to take the mask off, if you will. 00:19:03.144 --> 00:19:22.925 If you're willing to start engaging in real deep relationships and bring to three or four, you know, trusted confidants that here's something I'm struggling with and I wanna get better, and I want your feedback and I want you, you know, to punch me in the face if I'm not changing, uh, that's what's gonna drive it. 00:19:23.005 --> 00:19:32.845 You know, people that love you, that care about you, want you to be successful, they're for you, but will not hold back when you do need the hard truth. 00:19:33.194 --> 00:19:42.435 Uh, and it's, it's, um... I'm sure people know that both of us run masterminds, so that's a great opportunity if you don't necessarily have that community. 00:19:42.724 --> 00:19:49.205 You could join us virtually, just like this summit, and start building relationships and have that type of accountability. 00:19:49.595 --> 00:20:05.800 If you're fortunate enough to have that locally, then you just need to start, uh, sharing in that type of vulnerable way, inviting people in- Uh, setting those goals, I think that's important, having very specific goals, uh, that you can measure, that people can ask you about. 00:20:06.230 --> 00:20:07.709 Um, and make it public. 00:20:07.739 --> 00:20:10.989 And here's something that's even scarier. 00:20:12.060 --> 00:20:21.590 I wouldn't necessarily... I wouldn't ask the school community to hold me accountable, but what if you told the school, you know, "Here's what I think are my strengths. 00:20:21.619 --> 00:20:30.739 Here's something that I really wanna change, and I'm investing in myself and working with this group to change it, and I just wanna share that with you so, so you know. 00:20:30.739 --> 00:20:35.020 Because you're important to me, your success is important to this school. 00:20:35.020 --> 00:20:39.290 The kids won't do well without it, and, you know, it's just out there. 00:20:39.290 --> 00:20:40.969 So I'm not gonna hide behind it. 00:20:41.239 --> 00:20:49.399 I know I need to work on it, and I just wanna trust you with that information." So that'd be pretty interesting, uh, I think, to try out in your schools. 00:20:49.759 --> 00:20:50.020 Yeah. 00:20:50.020 --> 00:20:52.660 So you gave two really good things right there. 00:20:52.660 --> 00:20:54.020 Number one- Oh, all right ... yeah. 00:20:54.200 --> 00:20:55.079 Let me know what they were. 00:20:55.079 --> 00:20:56.119 I'll, I'll suss 'em out, man. 00:20:56.119 --> 00:20:56.899 Don't you worry. 00:20:57.489 --> 00:21:04.439 Number one, get curious about situations that make us upset, and number two, trust your community with information about yourself. 00:21:04.969 --> 00:21:14.660 As leaders, we are out in front, ready to get, um, mocked and beaten up in the court of public opinion. 00:21:14.660 --> 00:21:16.189 That happens all the time. 00:21:16.710 --> 00:21:18.069 And you know what? 00:21:18.069 --> 00:21:28.609 It's okay for us to be vulnerable about what our real weaknesses are, and it's really hard for people to make you feel bad about something you already know you're struggling with. 00:21:29.149 --> 00:21:30.210 So you know what? 00:21:30.469 --> 00:21:32.990 I'm not too good at this specific thing. 00:21:33.429 --> 00:21:48.219 Um, for me, I'm not too good at attention to detail, and I have these great ideas, and I really need people around me who can, um, who can pick up those details and start putting things into place. 00:21:48.639 --> 00:21:58.600 For example, um, the assessment, uh, in our district, taking care... making sure all the students are taking all the tests, I am not good at that. 00:21:58.630 --> 00:22:02.590 If I am in charge of that, it's not going to work, and I know that. 00:22:03.030 --> 00:22:18.820 So I ask people who are super anal and super focused and super close, pay attention to detail, they're the ones who put those assessment calendars into place, and I've, I've only said that to those two people that I've put in charge of that. 00:22:19.180 --> 00:22:29.300 So even me saying that here right now to you and all the viewers, that was liberating for me because now I don't feel like I have to hide behind that anymore, you know? 00:22:29.639 --> 00:22:37.329 So that is... Being able to trust your community, I think, was spot on and definitely a great piece of advice. 00:22:37.329 --> 00:22:41.410 So thank you for, for talking through that and sharing that. 00:22:42.050 --> 00:22:49.270 Y- you know, something that you shared there, too, I think people really respond to folks that are s- self-aware, right? 00:22:49.620 --> 00:22:55.430 The, one of the worst kind of leaders- is somebody who goes throughout the day, right? 00:22:55.709 --> 00:23:02.530 They're dropping little grenades everywhere, and there's collateral damage all around them, and they don't see it, right? 00:23:03.379 --> 00:23:23.519 How much more connection are you gonna create within your building when you say, "This is something I'm working on. I know it needs to get better. I'm sorry that it's not, you know, as developed as it needs to be yet." I mean, that type of self-awareness I think really communicates that you, that you care about others and you care about developing as a person. 00:23:23.519 --> 00:23:28.449 And, and then it models to your people, too, you know, where do you need to improve? 00:23:28.559 --> 00:23:38.419 You don't even have to tell them, "Jethro, you're not great with the details and, uh, you dropped the ball on this assessment thing." Jethro starts thinking, "Wow, Daniel's sharing that with me. 00:23:38.879 --> 00:23:39.820 Where can I improve? 00:23:39.820 --> 00:23:41.629 Where can I ask for help as well?" 00:23:42.099 --> 00:23:51.340 Uh, and one other thing I wanted to share, too, that, that D'Andre's great at, uh, is w- you know, and you talking about opening up about yourself, right? 00:23:52.199 --> 00:24:04.829 You know, not just weaknesses or whatever, but, uh, if you have kids, use them 'cause people get mad, right, wh- when some new initiative comes, uh, through and they start thinking about, "How are we gonna implement this?" 00:24:04.829 --> 00:24:06.370 You know, and there's just questions or whatever. 00:24:06.370 --> 00:24:07.020 There's change. 00:24:07.289 --> 00:24:10.359 People start to get a little, uh, frustrated by that. 00:24:10.709 --> 00:24:17.259 But when... He often counters those initiatives with a story about his kids, and he uses pictures. 00:24:17.509 --> 00:24:22.969 It's brilliant because it always brings the anxiety level way, way down. 00:24:23.759 --> 00:24:30.770 It's hard to be mad and it just be like ugh, like that when you see these cute little four-year-old, two-year-old, you know, on the screen. 00:24:31.039 --> 00:24:32.789 So unfortunately, I don't have kids. 00:24:32.789 --> 00:24:36.719 Maybe I should just start lying and put pictures of kids up there. 00:24:36.719 --> 00:24:38.759 But if you have kids, use them. 00:24:39.219 --> 00:24:43.459 But the real, the real, uh, point of the story is to, to share about your life. 00:24:43.899 --> 00:24:51.289 Uh, imagine, too, you know, when you're a teacher, remember when a kid sees you in the grocery store, they freak out 'cause they can't believe you're a real human being. 00:24:51.779 --> 00:24:52.450 That's the thing. 00:24:52.889 --> 00:24:54.810 You gotta show people that you're a human. 00:24:54.810 --> 00:24:55.410 They know it. 00:24:55.410 --> 00:25:01.910 I mean, we're all humans, but bring, bring that personality, uh, to life with your community. 00:25:01.910 --> 00:25:08.100 You don't have to be just a leader that has it all together 'cause you don't, and if you do, you're a liar, right? 00:25:08.270 --> 00:25:09.910 Yeah, no matter what, you're a liar. 00:25:10.020 --> 00:25:10.419 That's for sure. 00:25:10.419 --> 00:25:11.800 Yeah, exactly. 00:25:12.139 --> 00:25:14.719 So just invite people into your story. 00:25:14.719 --> 00:25:16.410 They, they wanna be connected to you. 00:25:16.440 --> 00:25:17.660 They wanna know you're a good person. 00:25:19.510 --> 00:25:26.190 Yeah, you know, one of the things that, that I was thinking of while you were talking was letting people know, um, what you're working on. 00:25:26.219 --> 00:25:34.380 I, I had a, a teacher that we had to n- uh, not renew her contract with, and, um, she... 00:25:34.680 --> 00:25:38.064 her reason for it was that- I didn't like her. 00:25:38.334 --> 00:25:48.055 And the reality was is that I really did like her, and because we had to have so many hard conversations, it was really hard for that to come through. 00:25:48.265 --> 00:25:58.135 And- Mm-hmm ... um, you still gotta let people know that you're real and that you care about them, and you can't just, you know, let it be all business all the time. 00:25:58.655 --> 00:26:02.624 And, you know, that's, that's some... For some people, that's a hard thing to do. 00:26:02.975 --> 00:26:12.875 For other people, that is totally natural, and building these relationships is very easy to do, and, and talking to people and making sure they know that you value them is very natural. 00:26:13.184 --> 00:26:15.535 And for others, that takes a lot of effort- Mm 00:26:15.535 --> 00:26:17.714 and you really gotta work hard at that. 00:26:17.815 --> 00:26:30.695 And, um, you know, when we got a lot of stress and we got a lot of things on our plates as leaders, it's easy for us to get in that rut, um, of not showing people that we care and that we know who they are and that we are human also. 00:26:31.164 --> 00:26:37.024 So I think that was really good advice that you gave to invite people in and share your story with them. 00:26:37.135 --> 00:26:38.484 That's just powerful. 00:26:38.954 --> 00:26:41.604 Um, I really appreciate the time you've taken today. 00:26:41.884 --> 00:26:44.695 Um, any closing words before we sign off? 00:26:46.004 --> 00:26:56.144 No, just, uh, the... I think my challenge to, you know, ask people if, if they're giving their best, you know, and what the implications for, uh, how you treat them, how you view them. 00:26:56.415 --> 00:26:58.305 Uh, just start getting curious. 00:26:58.394 --> 00:27:02.114 Um, start being, you know, or continue to be honest with yourself. 00:27:02.604 --> 00:27:05.604 And we talked about, you know, having a community of support. 00:27:05.604 --> 00:27:15.555 So, uh, if you don't have that, there's, there's help out there, and really the only thing you need to do is, is, uh, reach out and ask for that help. 00:27:15.555 --> 00:27:17.775 So Jethro runs those masterminds. 00:27:17.775 --> 00:27:18.625 I have them as well. 00:27:18.625 --> 00:27:22.684 We'd love to work with you and, uh, help you be the best version of yourself. 00:27:23.464 --> 00:27:23.735 Yeah. 00:27:23.884 --> 00:27:24.714 Absolutely. 00:27:24.744 --> 00:27:33.994 And if you've been watching this and you've learned something and maybe you missed some of the other interviews, all of them are as impactful as this one is. 00:27:33.994 --> 00:27:38.934 And so please click on the little button down below that says All Access Pass. 00:27:38.975 --> 00:27:46.375 Go ahead and sign up for that, and you'll be able to have these plus a bunch of other free goodies that are gonna come along with it. 00:27:46.375 --> 00:27:53.194 So thank you so much for watching and for doing your part to be the best leader you can be. 00:27:53.604 --> 00:27:54.405 Thanks again, Daniel. 00:27:54.405 --> 00:27:55.274 Appreciate your time. 00:27:55.815 --> 00:27:56.464 Thanks, Jethro.