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All right, Sy, thank you so much for joining me today for this conversation and for giving
your time and your expertise.

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Really excited to dive into your experiences and learn a little bit more about your
journey, which is a great place to start.

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So why don't you give us a little rundown on what you're up to currently and what's led
you to this point in your career and just in life in general.

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Sure.

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And thank you very much for having me.

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So I am currently the VP of marketing for a company called Tulip.

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We're a B2B SaaS company that started out of Kitchener, Ontario in Canada, and we're now
sort of remote work from anywhere company.

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I've been in this role for almost two years now.

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And where I came from is very different, not your normal path to get to where I am here.

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I usually get

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some funny looks when I tell people that I started out my career in the theatre.

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On stage, I went to a theatre school, lived in the UK for a number of years, worked in
theatre there, then moved back to Canada, continued to work in theatre for a little bit

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and then made the choice to pivot my career and went back to school and got my MBA.

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And that was at the Sauder School of Business in Vancouver, UBC.

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And from there, I've been working in marketing ever since.

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For the last, gosh, 13 years or so now, I started out in a large telecom company working
on of B2C marketing.

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And then from there moved on, got into tech, B2B, specifically, and worked in marketing
there for another company in Vancouver and then moved to

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about two years ago.

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So a little bit of a funny way to start, but that's my story.

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Yeah.

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that, you know, coming out of school, you have ample opportunities to do whatever,
wherever the wind, go wherever the wind takes you and to do whatever you want.

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So talk to me a little bit about that kind of TSN turning point.

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What made you want to go and get your MBA and, you know, transition out of theatre?

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Well, yeah, it is interesting that you say like the world is your oyster out of out of
school.

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I would also say out of school, you have very limited information on what it's like to
actually be doing a job, right?

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You've got all the schooling for it, but you've never actually done it.

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And that was was big learning for me because I did all the schooling and had always wanted
to to to sort of be in that space and then got into it and very quickly was like, huh,

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this isn't actually.

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you

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me.

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I, you know, I saw very quickly, even when I was kind of in the latter stages of
schooling, I was just like, something doesn't feel right, but I'm going to give it a shot

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because it's it's been something I've, I've thought about for so long, that I didn't want
to not do it and have regrets.

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I realized very quickly that I didn't like the lack of control that I had on my own
career, I could do I could be the best at what I'm doing.

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But for instance, like it's a visual medium.

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And for instance, if you are up for a role and they've cast someone in the male lead and
you're up for the female lead, if the male lead is shorter than you physically, you're not

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going to get the part, even if you're the best person for it, because they don't, they
want to have that.

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It's a visual medium.

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And it's things, little things like that, that really kind of got to me.

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And I was just like, you know, there's so much outside of my control.

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So I.

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It was interesting.

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I moved back to Canada and when I came back here, I was like, okay, I'm going to give this
another shot.

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I'm going to keep at this for, I'm going to give myself a year.

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And I did, and I worked in the theater.

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I mean, it's a hard slog.

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So you're working in the theater, then you're also between jobs doing things because it's
not a stable, long time type of a career.

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But I was just like, I want to give this a fair shot and make sure that I'm, you know,

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not doing this just because of the slog, the hardship of getting work and all that kind of
stuff.

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I want to make sure that I'm making this decision because even the job itself is not
enough for me.

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So I actually got a great role in a play.

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It was a two person role.

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And we kind of alternated roles every other night.

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So was literally playing the entire play in one day versus the next.

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And I thought, you know, this is it.

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This is kind of like the

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is if this is not enough, then it's not enough.

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And at the end of it, I said, you know what, that's fun, but it's not enough.

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And that was the turning point for me.

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And it was kind of what I learned from that was the importance of leaving on a high versus
leaving on a low.

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Because I look back on that and I say, you know what, I really did give it a shot.

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I had really good work come my way and it still wasn't enough.

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Because you could always make the argument of

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Well, didn't really like you could have these all these what ifs that come later on.

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I don't have any of that now.

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I'm fine.

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You know, I look back and I'm like, I have no regrets with my decision.

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And so I, at that point, I was kind of looking around and did a career assessment, I think
one of those career assessments and the idea of an MBA popped up and I had had some, some

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jobs working in sort of a managerial capacity, working with people and I loved it.

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And that was kind of my first tip off of like, maybe I should try this.

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And then I did this career assessment thing and it suggested maybe, you going back to
school.

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And that's when I started looking in the MBA.

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And I was in Vancouver at the time and wanted to stay in Vancouver and got into the the
solder program.

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I like to say I kind of all the weird kid boxes because I was a woman and there's less
women usually on at least there was when I went to school, less women in the the programs

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and like

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who comes from theater then does their MBA and they always want to have, you know, like
they're a little bit of diversity.

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that was, yeah, that sort of set me on my way.

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fantastic.

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And I love that you gave, think leaving on a high is such an important lesson and
something that many people don't consider.

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And so I love that you gave it, you you set the benchmarks and the criteria for yourself
of if this still isn't enough, this is what this role would be consistently on the best of

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days.

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And if this isn't enough, it's time to go.

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and also giving yourself that year mark.

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And I think that's something too, that is really important for people to consider because
otherwise it's those what ifs and you know, maybe you kick, yeah, you kick a change down

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the road and then you end up 20 years in not doing something that you love because you've
just said, well, when it gets better, when it gets better, but that year mark, holding

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yourself to that is really important.

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I think it musters up all of your courage, your energy, and your focus really to see
something through for a year and then make your decision at the end.

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So I think that's good.

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think it's also helpful to, because for me, I have a very busy mind and it's a good way to
sort of quiet it a little bit and saying, okay, I'm still in the year.

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We gave ourselves that there's a deadline.

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I don't have to be thinking about this now.

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Let's wait until like, I've got a time where I can just actually sit down and assess and
really think about it.

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And it helps, it does help the focus in that way.

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Absolutely, close some of mental tabs.

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Yeah, yeah.

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I'm sure many people can relate to that.

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Myself included.

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okay, so career assessment to MBA.

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You get into the MBA and now you've come out and you're in marketing.

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You know, I think one of the things that is really interesting is the transferable skills
that many of us don't realize we possess, that we carry into, whether that's a new career

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or a new role, or even perhaps a job break.

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We gain so many transferable skills during those times that we can then reenter the
marketplace with.

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So talk to me a little bit about first year experience in theatre and some of the
transferable skills that you brought from, whether it was school or from, you know,

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understanding that, kind of riding that high.

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and lows of that career into your current work and how those have shaped who you are
today.

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Mm-hmm, sure.

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So I mean, I guess the first thing I would say in theater, it's your job is to work with
people.

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the product is you interacting with another person, right?

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So the value of, you know, collaboration and trust.

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Like there's all these, this is why there's all these trust exercises when you think about
like the theater school kids and doing like the falling into each other's arms and making

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sure they catch you kind of thing.

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Because you have to have trust in order for you to actually have a proper

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like the best working relationship you can have.

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And you have to find a way to, I'm not even gonna say enjoy working with everybody that
you work with, because it's hard to, sometimes there's people who have different styles

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and they're just, but you still have to work with them and you have to find a way to still
be collaborative and have that trust.

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And because in the theater, if you don't, you can still make it work, but it takes so much
energy out of,

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your performance and everything if you're working up against like, hate this person or
like, we're just not working together.

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So that's been really, really like a very transferable skill for me, I would say.

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And being able to, and like to this day, I think one of the things that I often bring to
the table is how we work with, how I'll work with myself, work with people across the

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organization in different functional areas, but also how to teach my team how to, right?

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And not because there is this tendency, either through fear or what have you to sort of
silo yourself and just do what you're doing and not maybe be a little afraid to ask other

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people because you might think it's not like you should know the answer or you're not
really doing your job if you're if you're getting help kind of thing.

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And I think what I've learned from coming from a profession where you, you absolutely have
to like the more you you engage with other people and

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figure out common ground, the better things are.

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That's really taught me the value of, you know, finding common ground with someone and
finding your people.

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And I think my time at IntelliCom, where you're working in a large organization really
helped me with that, because that's a lot about navigating internally and figuring out the

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right people to talk to.

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That's one of the keys to working in those large organizations.

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yeah, collaboration for sure.

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I mean, also, think like public speaking is which is a passion of mine is something that's
been really helpful.

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Being able to get up in front of people and speak with conviction.

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Obviously, you're doing that in theater and you're up on stage or in front of a classroom
in school.

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And you just have you get practice at it and the value of just doing that over and over
and over again is so important.

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But just understanding how

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you know, what it means because when you're again in the theater space, one of the lessons
that I learned was it's it's not really about when you're when you're talking to somebody,

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it's not actually about you at all.

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It's you have to shoot that energy out of you and think like I want to make you feel X.

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I want to make you feel happy or joyful or concerned or whatever.

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And if you put your energy into that person and into that intention, it actually helps the
nerves tremendously because it is no longer about you.

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It also really helps with your ability to tell the story and to communicate.

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So that's really been really, really helpful.

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More so than I thought, that was a pretty surprising thing.

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was like, okay, I'm actually learning quite a lot from my theater background.

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I wasn't expecting to pull in as much as I did.

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So yeah, those are definitely some really transferable skills for me.

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Absolutely.

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Pardon me.

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mean, collaboration wholeheartedly.

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then, yes, the, the ability, I think obviously to present.

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And then you said something also really interesting, which was to, you know, to put
essentially you're, learning empathy in, in my opinion, right?

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You're learning how to be empathetic by sharing a feeling or wanting to put that feeling
on someone else so that they, your intention is felt.

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And the same goes for providing feedback when you're a leader.

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You want to make sure that your intention is felt.

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You want somebody, obviously, to feel like they're being supported, that you're providing
feedback with the best of intentions to help them grow.

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And if you're so focused on yourself, then it's not going to be received in the way that
you want.

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So I can completely see how that crosses barriers, definitely, into the work you're doing
now.

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helps it.

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It also helps when you're talking with like with leadership and executive, right?

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Like it made me.

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It made me realize like when when I'm trying to get something done or approved or what
have you, who am I talking to?

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What do they think?

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Like all of a sudden you're thinking about them and saying and you can start being
strategic about it and saying what are they?

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What are they?

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What do they know about this issue that I'm talking to them about?

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What was the last conversation they had about this issue that I'm talking about?

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Who was it with?

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What are their feelings on it now?

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What are their concerns?

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What are you know?

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And then if you start thinking about that, you can address them head on and having that
kind of that view of what they might be thinking and feeling.

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And then you're right.

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Also, like with your team, if you're giving feedback, thinking through like where their
heads might be at and how something might be received, as opposed to like being very

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concerned about how you come across.

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It's a very different energy.

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I've fallen back into, you know, thinking about where how I come across and it doesn't
ever go as well.

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So yeah, absolutely.

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It really is about empathy and thinking about what they might be feeling.

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yeah.

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And then tethering it what they care about too, right?

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What are their priorities?

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Why does this matter for them?

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So I, yeah.

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All of those are very important tools, no matter who you're engaging with.

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If you need to collaborate with someone, I think that is the absolute key.

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And you've just turned that lock for so many people.

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So that's really, really helpful.

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And I would imagine that in knowing this information and for yourself in moving through
then the marketing space and in management, obviously that's something that you're

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passionate about as you've alluded to.

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And as we can tell, you're passionate

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the growth of others.

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But I would imagine that also having those skills and then imparting them onto your team
as well helps with retention and productivity within your team, right?

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The way that they communicate and collaborate together and with those outside of your kind
of immediate nucleus.

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Collaboration, I'm guessing, is obviously a big part of the work you do as a team right
now.

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is.

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Yeah, absolutely.

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And it is interesting how often we don't collaborate.

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And we just don't think about like, hey, maybe somebody in the company knows about this
and knows it an angle to this.

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It's happened so many times that I'm like, there is something to that.

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And I do think it might, just kind of stems from maybe a place of fear.

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It's also like,

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more challenging in a remote environment too.

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Like, you know, in a physical office space, you might overhear someone talking about
something and say like, I actually need to learn a little bit more about that if you do

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know something and you wouldn't in a remote space.

203
00:16:26,149 --> 00:16:28,441
So yeah, absolutely.

204
00:16:28,441 --> 00:16:34,515
It's something that I think it's an active area of focus for me.

205
00:16:34,515 --> 00:16:40,559
And I think the team, like our teams are always just so much better when we engage with
others.

206
00:16:40,559 --> 00:16:41,752
And when you find your

207
00:16:41,752 --> 00:16:48,145
find your people who like know a whole lot about what you need help with and also are
willing to help with it.

208
00:16:48,445 --> 00:16:56,339
Obviously then there's sort of like, you also want to make sure there's a give and take
and make sure that we can be helpful to them as much as possible so that they can continue

209
00:16:56,339 --> 00:17:00,141
to be nice to us and give us their expertise.

210
00:17:00,141 --> 00:17:07,247
But that's definitely like a big part of my approach when I lead a team for sure.

211
00:17:07,247 --> 00:17:07,948
Absolutely.

212
00:17:07,948 --> 00:17:16,874
And it sounds like in order to do that, I mean, you've mentioned trust being one of the
cornerstones of effective leadership and, you know, in order to create the space where

213
00:17:16,874 --> 00:17:18,195
people are.

214
00:17:18,387 --> 00:17:27,866
feel safe collaborating and feel safe bringing up whether that's concerns or potential
barriers or even some of the good things.

215
00:17:27,866 --> 00:17:36,884
Maybe they just don't feel comfortable totally speaking up but that requires a healthy
degree of transparency and honesty both at the leadership level and then cultivating it

216
00:17:36,884 --> 00:17:41,388
throughout you know the team level for their peers.

217
00:17:41,388 --> 00:17:43,630
So in thinking about that

218
00:17:44,311 --> 00:17:52,565
about transparency and honesty, how have you cultivated an inclusive and supportive
workplace culture with those two things in mind?

219
00:17:53,006 --> 00:17:53,986
Mm hmm.

220
00:17:54,167 --> 00:17:56,768
I mean, I think it's really just about modeling it, right?

221
00:17:56,768 --> 00:18:01,829
Like, I can't ask someone to be transparent with me if I'm not being transparent with
them.

222
00:18:02,870 --> 00:18:13,034
And that often means, you know, saying like, okay, here, I was part of this conversation,
this is what was said, just so you for nothing else, if there's going to be a change in

223
00:18:13,034 --> 00:18:16,136
priorities or change in a project that they're working on.

224
00:18:17,977 --> 00:18:21,558
I'll because I'd found in my past,

225
00:18:21,558 --> 00:18:30,833
especially again, working at the thing of my time in a large organization where things can
change a lot and you have no idea why because there's so many different levels and so many

226
00:18:30,833 --> 00:18:40,508
different stakeholders that are involved in initiatives that you might be running, but
then they'll have a say and then everything changes.

227
00:18:42,850 --> 00:18:50,964
That it helped me tremendously when someone said, okay, here's a conversation that's going
on between these two leads over there and this one isn't buying it.

228
00:18:51,106 --> 00:18:55,330
Your lead is trying to fight for it, but I don't know what's going to happen kind of
thing.

229
00:18:55,330 --> 00:19:02,515
I mean, there's something to be said for making sure the work still gets done and you're
stalling progress because people are just waiting.

230
00:19:04,157 --> 00:19:13,694
You kind of have to find that balance, but I don't think it's a matter of not expressing
what's happening at the executive level, especially if there are potential impacts to your

231
00:19:13,694 --> 00:19:14,045
team.

232
00:19:14,045 --> 00:19:21,090
Also, if someone on your team is passionate about something and really wants to see a
project through,

233
00:19:21,580 --> 00:19:28,875
and you're saying, this person is not buying it, that might be an opportunity for your
team to say, like, I want to get in front of this.

234
00:19:28,875 --> 00:19:31,878
Let me have some time with them and I can talk them through this.

235
00:19:31,878 --> 00:19:41,255
And that's a great opportunity for them to get some visibility with leadership and say
their piece and also transfer information that might be lost in the mix.

236
00:19:41,255 --> 00:19:44,406
And the mix sometimes could be me.

237
00:19:44,670 --> 00:19:48,696
I fully acknowledge that I don't have all the information that my team.

238
00:19:48,696 --> 00:19:54,268
will have and so I'll try to get them in front of the right person so I'm not missing
anything.

239
00:19:54,268 --> 00:20:01,670
But I can't do that unless I'm explaining what's happening.

240
00:20:01,670 --> 00:20:10,112
that's first and foremost is I have to model the way if I want my team to be transparent.

241
00:20:10,212 --> 00:20:18,774
I I think otherwise, if it is about, if you get into more, maybe harder conversations,

242
00:20:19,352 --> 00:20:21,053
someone wants to have with you as their lead.

243
00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:23,434
And I understand that hard conversations can be hard.

244
00:20:23,434 --> 00:20:24,587
I've been in that position.

245
00:20:24,587 --> 00:20:35,015
Like, how do I say that like, I'm overworked or my plate is full and there's too much
going on and not look bad or whatever.

246
00:20:35,015 --> 00:20:38,798
I've been in that situation and it's hard.

247
00:20:38,859 --> 00:20:45,844
So like, it's just about asking the question and saying like how, you know, and asking it
often, right?

248
00:20:45,844 --> 00:20:48,222
Like if you ask it once and then forget about it,

249
00:20:48,222 --> 00:20:48,962
doesn't really count.

250
00:20:48,962 --> 00:20:51,124
have to ask people repeatedly.

251
00:20:51,124 --> 00:20:54,805
doing a check in with that with with them, like how are things going?

252
00:20:56,206 --> 00:20:57,147
Yeah.

253
00:20:57,427 --> 00:21:07,793
And then I mean, I think the other thing is, even just just being human, you know, like if
I'm if I have a bad day, if I'm having a bad day, or, you know, really, you know, mentally

254
00:21:07,793 --> 00:21:16,677
foggy, because, you know, for whatever reason, I'm gonna let the I'm gonna let the team
know just be like, guys, bear with me, I'm having a I'm having a day, I'm gonna get there,

255
00:21:16,677 --> 00:21:18,378
but I'm having a day and it's

256
00:21:18,594 --> 00:21:22,413
I think being human like that is just really helpful.

257
00:21:22,413 --> 00:21:25,147
Yeah, and there's a relatability too, right?

258
00:21:25,147 --> 00:21:37,162
mean, nobody wants a manager that's a robot and that certainly does not give you the
opportunity to then feel like you can have days where you don't have it all together.

259
00:21:37,162 --> 00:21:41,067
And I feel like that's become more and more.

260
00:21:41,536 --> 00:21:47,682
acceptable and I am doing air quotes when I say acceptable these days because it should
always be acceptable.

261
00:21:47,682 --> 00:21:53,227
At the end of the day, we are humans working with other humans and that's something that
AI can never replace.

262
00:21:54,049 --> 00:22:04,018
So I love that you share those those pieces with your team and they I'm sure they respect
that and they appreciate that and it's helpful for them when they're having a bad day or

263
00:22:04,203 --> 00:22:16,781
something isn't going right, but they have more comfortability coming to you and that also
allows you to get ahead of any potential catastrophes from stress or overwhelm or fear or

264
00:22:16,781 --> 00:22:18,262
whatever that might be.

265
00:22:19,264 --> 00:22:19,804
absolutely.

266
00:22:19,804 --> 00:22:25,794
Because often things will come up and I will have no idea, no idea at all.

267
00:22:25,794 --> 00:22:27,759
And in fact, sometimes we'll think the opposite.

268
00:22:27,759 --> 00:22:34,103
You know, like there was an example where I gave my team member a project that I thought
would be exciting.

269
00:22:34,183 --> 00:22:41,687
And then because we had that rapport, they were able to come to me and say, like, I'm
feeling really overwhelmed and this is not, this project is not helping.

270
00:22:41,687 --> 00:22:44,289
I said, okay, taking it off your plate, you won't do it.

271
00:22:44,289 --> 00:22:45,934
I had no idea.

272
00:22:46,262 --> 00:22:48,404
I was completely out to lunch with that.

273
00:22:48,404 --> 00:22:57,251
so all the more reason that I needed to hear from my team member that said that I can't
handle this right now because it wasn't an essential project.

274
00:22:57,251 --> 00:23:00,633
So it was a very easy thing for me to say, okay, I'm taking it off.

275
00:23:00,693 --> 00:23:01,773
So yeah.

276
00:23:01,773 --> 00:23:03,224
Yeah, definitely.

277
00:23:03,224 --> 00:23:08,218
I always say too, I mean, you see basically a couple of hours of somebody's day.

278
00:23:08,218 --> 00:23:09,359
So you have no idea.

279
00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:10,370
We're not mind readers.

280
00:23:10,370 --> 00:23:12,331
You can't read your team's mind.

281
00:23:12,412 --> 00:23:21,249
And one of the interesting things is that, you know, for any of the leaders who might be
feeling that fear and don't want to say that their plate is too full or they're

282
00:23:21,249 --> 00:23:30,146
overwhelmed, I'm pretty sure that no matter whether it's C-suite, a manager, or even a
collaborator would rather have you say,

283
00:23:30,529 --> 00:23:41,739
I'm overwhelmed and I don't think I can do this to the quality it deserves to be given,
rather than kind of half-assing something and not either putting the time and the

284
00:23:41,739 --> 00:23:47,814
dedication into it or missing something and then that's a mess that needs to be cleaned up
after.

285
00:23:47,814 --> 00:23:52,698
It's really about being proactive in those conversations too, right?

286
00:23:53,435 --> 00:23:53,564
100%.

287
00:23:53,564 --> 00:24:00,638
I know I got I had really good, good guidance from how to handle that myself when I was
overwhelmed early days.

288
00:24:00,918 --> 00:24:02,636
And so I thought, how do I put this?

289
00:24:02,636 --> 00:24:04,440
How do I say this without coming across?

290
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:07,351
Like, I'm, you know, like, how do I provide a solution here?

291
00:24:07,351 --> 00:24:09,741
So it's not just giving them a problem to solve.

292
00:24:09,742 --> 00:24:19,386
And it was actually my mom, who had suggested she was, it said, like, you know, why don't
you put things in priority order that you're working on and saying, here's what I think my

293
00:24:19,386 --> 00:24:20,646
priorities are.

294
00:24:20,674 --> 00:24:23,355
If that's the case, I can't get to this last item.

295
00:24:23,355 --> 00:24:24,616
Does that align with you?

296
00:24:24,616 --> 00:24:27,157
And I did it and I was wrong.

297
00:24:27,157 --> 00:24:28,817
The priorities were wrong.

298
00:24:28,817 --> 00:24:30,038
So thank God I did.

299
00:24:30,038 --> 00:24:35,570
And they swapped things around and I was like, this is the thing that was driving me
crazy.

300
00:24:35,570 --> 00:24:36,621
It's not as important.

301
00:24:36,621 --> 00:24:37,891
I had no idea.

302
00:24:37,891 --> 00:24:41,282
And so I dropped it.

303
00:24:41,282 --> 00:24:49,746
And then what was also interesting is this was early in my career when I was still at the
telecom company.

304
00:24:50,346 --> 00:24:55,869
I was recognized that month for one of the top performers, which I hadn't actually been.

305
00:24:55,869 --> 00:24:59,611
And I think it was because I put it out there and I was like, all this stuff is going on.

306
00:24:59,611 --> 00:25:01,792
And I got it in front of them.

307
00:25:01,792 --> 00:25:09,637
And I mean, maybe they were also doing it as a way to sort of make me feel better about,
about things, but I got on their radar in a way that was, that ended up being kind of

308
00:25:09,637 --> 00:25:10,457
positive.

309
00:25:10,457 --> 00:25:19,598
So that's just a good little trick for if you're feeling like you don't want to present a
problem without a solution, but you're really overwhelmed, just.

310
00:25:19,598 --> 00:25:23,161
put it on paper and say like this, this needs to fall off.

311
00:25:23,161 --> 00:25:23,901
Is that correct?

312
00:25:23,901 --> 00:25:29,325
And so it's an easier solve for your lead to do kind of thing.

313
00:25:29,839 --> 00:25:33,699
Yeah, don't give them more work, but lay it out.

314
00:25:33,699 --> 00:25:36,359
And then yeah, that shows initiative as well.

315
00:25:37,559 --> 00:25:41,539
And your mother's very wise, very, very wise.

316
00:25:41,783 --> 00:25:49,793
She was a lead herself, so think she got the, she understood the need to, you know, come
with solutions and not problems kind of thing.

317
00:25:49,793 --> 00:25:50,913
Yes, yes, exactly.

318
00:25:50,913 --> 00:25:59,283
And I think one of the interesting things too is that when people hear that, especially if
they're first time people leaders or even just first time in the workforce and they hear,

319
00:25:59,283 --> 00:26:02,547
I need to come with solutions, they think they have to have it fully flushed out.

320
00:26:02,547 --> 00:26:04,908
But your example, right?

321
00:26:04,908 --> 00:26:10,750
And your example is a perfect demonstration of you just need to have a list on paper to
say, here's what I'm working on.

322
00:26:10,750 --> 00:26:15,252
You need to have it started to show that you've put some thought and consideration into
it.

323
00:26:15,252 --> 00:26:19,393
You don't need to have a fully baked plan with a budget and

324
00:26:19,763 --> 00:26:22,821
a five-year milestone checklist.

325
00:26:22,821 --> 00:26:24,214
That's not what people are looking for.

326
00:26:24,214 --> 00:26:28,814
They're just looking for a little bit of give and they'll give a little bit in return.

327
00:26:28,814 --> 00:26:30,591
Absolutely, absolutely.

328
00:26:30,895 --> 00:26:47,075
Now, I want to talk about another side of you and your career growth and journey and that
is your a couple of breaks that you've taken for maternity leave and

329
00:26:47,137 --> 00:26:57,559
I'd love to dive into that and chat a little bit more about that and some of the perhaps
the significant milestones that came along with that and some of the learnings that came

330
00:26:57,559 --> 00:27:04,647
out of both taking maternity leave and then coming back and what that's looked like for
you as a leader.

331
00:27:05,578 --> 00:27:06,459
gosh.

332
00:27:06,459 --> 00:27:07,459
Yeah.

333
00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:17,264
I mean, I mean, the punchline is my career was wholeheartedly impacted by my having
children.

334
00:27:19,466 --> 00:27:22,097
And in ways that I was not expecting it to.

335
00:27:22,097 --> 00:27:27,530
Yeah, it's made a huge difference.

336
00:27:27,530 --> 00:27:31,212
mean, first of all, it's.

337
00:27:31,212 --> 00:27:35,404
much changes when when you become a mom, I mean, you know, and

338
00:27:35,982 --> 00:27:39,542
before I became a mother, I had no idea.

339
00:27:39,542 --> 00:27:45,042
People would say things to me and, you know, about like, maybe you don't want to come back
to work.

340
00:27:45,042 --> 00:27:47,462
And I would be like, what are you talking about?

341
00:27:47,462 --> 00:27:50,002
And then you have a kid and you're like, oh, I get it now.

342
00:27:50,002 --> 00:27:51,062
Everything changes.

343
00:27:51,062 --> 00:27:53,902
Your priorities go all over the place.

344
00:27:54,082 --> 00:27:57,062
For me, my level of ambition changed.

345
00:27:57,062 --> 00:28:03,302
I realized that it was not, that whole thinking that you don't have to be on a constant
climb.

346
00:28:03,302 --> 00:28:05,062
You can just take a pause.

347
00:28:05,302 --> 00:28:11,984
and just ease off the gas pedal in terms of your level of ambition was huge for me because
I did.

348
00:28:12,284 --> 00:28:25,968
And in fact, when I came back to work and I was working at a place that it was not
supportive for me and it wasn't working.

349
00:28:25,968 --> 00:28:28,468
wasn't, you know, I was having issues with childcare.

350
00:28:28,468 --> 00:28:31,459
For instance, my daughter was in a day home.

351
00:28:31,459 --> 00:28:32,630
We couldn't get her into group care.

352
00:28:32,630 --> 00:28:34,030
So it was a day home.

353
00:28:34,572 --> 00:28:39,426
If she got sick, my day home provider was like, sorry, she's got to stay home for the
week.

354
00:28:39,727 --> 00:28:41,868
I couldn't get time off work.

355
00:28:41,889 --> 00:28:46,243
So I had a sick child and was sick myself and was trying to launch a campaign at the same
time.

356
00:28:46,243 --> 00:28:47,764
And it was bananas.

357
00:28:47,764 --> 00:28:50,936
And I quit outright.

358
00:28:50,957 --> 00:28:53,058
I didn't have a backup plan.

359
00:28:54,482 --> 00:29:01,326
I think I kind of, this might sound a little like woo woo, but it was like when I was in
the middle of it, there was a knock on my door.

360
00:29:01,454 --> 00:29:05,734
And it was a check for some money that my grandmother had left.

361
00:29:05,734 --> 00:29:07,534
Not a whole lot of money.

362
00:29:07,754 --> 00:29:11,254
Not very much at all, but it was enough to float me for a couple of months.

363
00:29:11,254 --> 00:29:14,454
And it was happening right, it happened right when I was in the depths of this.

364
00:29:14,454 --> 00:29:16,594
And I thought, okay, I'm gonna take this as a sign.

365
00:29:16,594 --> 00:29:17,434
I think I'm out.

366
00:29:17,434 --> 00:29:18,994
I need to pause.

367
00:29:19,334 --> 00:29:21,294
And I swear, it's the best thing I did.

368
00:29:21,294 --> 00:29:23,114
I have absolutely no regrets.

369
00:29:23,114 --> 00:29:24,234
Holy smokes.

370
00:29:25,580 --> 00:29:32,194
A lot of people in the company were surprised and a lot of folks came forward and said, I
really respect what you're doing.

371
00:29:32,495 --> 00:29:37,579
And a lot of folks were like, wow, you don't have another job, you're just quitting?

372
00:29:37,579 --> 00:29:40,440
Yep, I am, this is not working for me.

373
00:29:40,901 --> 00:29:46,765
And I took a little bit of a break and it was wonderful.

374
00:29:46,765 --> 00:29:48,706
It was absolutely wonderful.

375
00:29:49,267 --> 00:29:52,709
Went back to my network, started chatting with people.

376
00:29:54,094 --> 00:29:56,285
told them kind of what I got clear on what I wanted.

377
00:29:56,285 --> 00:30:09,921
had a coach at the time that I still work with and was chatting with my coach a lot,
chatting with my network and through my network found my next role.

378
00:30:10,041 --> 00:30:11,191
And it was in tech.

379
00:30:11,191 --> 00:30:14,803
That was when I made the switch over to tech.

380
00:30:15,574 --> 00:30:22,476
And I inadvertently, even though I felt like I needed to pause and pull back,

381
00:30:22,506 --> 00:30:26,670
I had promoted myself and gotten a pay jump in the meantime.

382
00:30:26,670 --> 00:30:28,381
that's the part that was really unexpected for me.

383
00:30:28,381 --> 00:30:33,935
I was just like, you it actually worked out very, very well in that regard.

384
00:30:35,457 --> 00:30:40,622
So that kind of set me on a journey that truly I wanted to take that anyways.

385
00:30:40,622 --> 00:30:49,619
was, I think I got into a big company and you can get sort of seduced by all of the
internal movement possible, but I'd never intended to be there as long as I did anyways.

386
00:30:49,619 --> 00:30:51,030
So it kind of forced

387
00:30:51,456 --> 00:30:57,489
a move that I wanted to make anyway, just in a lot more abrupt fashion than I thought it
would.

388
00:30:57,790 --> 00:31:04,113
And yeah, it set me on a different path.

389
00:31:04,834 --> 00:31:14,119
yeah, it was a lot, I found myself in an environment that was a lot more manageable for
where I was.

390
00:31:14,419 --> 00:31:20,032
So, and then I had another turn in my, I have two kids, my second mat leave.

391
00:31:20,046 --> 00:31:25,746
brought about another change, which also ended up in a jump in my career.

392
00:31:25,746 --> 00:31:33,606
So I don't think that's typical, but I don't think unfortunately having to change roles
because of.

393
00:31:35,446 --> 00:31:46,517
like either because you have been on that leave and were away for a while or because
you're back and your priorities have changed, that instigating a change in moving

394
00:31:46,517 --> 00:31:48,429
companies, I don't think that's uncommon.

395
00:31:48,429 --> 00:31:50,666
Yeah, yeah, which is...

396
00:31:51,733 --> 00:31:53,534
which is not great.

397
00:31:53,554 --> 00:32:02,894
It's not something that there's a playbook for, unfortunately, in terms of how to deal
with that as a mother, especially when you're now also, you have another job, which takes

398
00:32:02,894 --> 00:32:04,174
a lot of your time and your energy.

399
00:32:04,174 --> 00:32:05,414
It is a job.

400
00:32:05,554 --> 00:32:08,874
It's a lot of, it's a lot more than a job, but it's also a job.

401
00:32:08,874 --> 00:32:11,414
So you are working, this is all happening.

402
00:32:11,434 --> 00:32:16,574
This change is all happening when you are also giving your time and your energy to
something else.

403
00:32:17,074 --> 00:32:19,778
So it's a very, very challenging time.

404
00:32:19,778 --> 00:32:28,057
But it got me to new and different places and sort of found something that worked better
for me.

405
00:32:28,057 --> 00:32:29,169
Yeah, and thank you.

406
00:32:29,169 --> 00:32:30,461
Thank you so much for sharing.

407
00:32:30,461 --> 00:32:38,263
think that's, you know, to your point, I don't think it's uncommon, but I also don't think
it's spoken about that much.

408
00:32:38,263 --> 00:32:41,113
And that's why I'm,

409
00:32:41,113 --> 00:32:51,471
grateful that you've shared your experiences because if that can at least provide solace
or a comfort to one other person out there to know that they're not alone, they're not the

410
00:32:51,471 --> 00:33:01,658
anomaly going through this, then I think that that is entirely worth it because it's not
often talked about and I don't understand why because it's something that's...

411
00:33:01,955 --> 00:33:04,716
That's natural that many of us go through.

412
00:33:04,797 --> 00:33:06,488
Some do, some choose not to.

413
00:33:06,488 --> 00:33:15,693
And I mean, for myself, I'm not that at that point yet personally, but it's in the
potential plans and starting to think now what would that look like?

414
00:33:15,693 --> 00:33:22,466
You know, as a business owner, how does, how do things change and how do my ambitions to
your point change?

415
00:33:22,887 --> 00:33:28,250
Because your ambitions get refocused and put on something else.

416
00:33:28,250 --> 00:33:30,412
So it's really interesting.

417
00:33:30,412 --> 00:33:34,445
it's, yeah, and I mean, and I'm glad you asked that question, because you're absolutely
right.

418
00:33:34,445 --> 00:33:38,174
I knew nothing about all these challenges until I became a mother.

419
00:33:38,174 --> 00:33:43,970
I now have like a community of women through like LinkedIn or through just my own network,
and we've gone through it.

420
00:33:44,651 --> 00:33:50,024
So, but it's staggering to hear the stories.

421
00:33:50,024 --> 00:33:57,418
Like I've got a good friend of mine who used to be my lead, and thankfully she was very,
very supportive.

422
00:33:58,018 --> 00:33:58,788
Kind of the same as you.

423
00:33:58,788 --> 00:34:01,970
She was like, I'm not there yet, but I do want to have a family.

424
00:34:01,970 --> 00:34:08,662
So was very conscious of that in terms of when I was going through and I was was I was
struggling getting pregnant the second time.

425
00:34:08,662 --> 00:34:14,795
And that also is something that really impacts your work and how you're there
professionally.

426
00:34:14,795 --> 00:34:25,589
And being able to have someone to actually talk to about that kind of stuff is is like was
was very was meant a whole lot to me at the time.

427
00:34:26,370 --> 00:34:27,808
But she's now

428
00:34:27,808 --> 00:34:34,983
started a company herself that's all about helping women who are going on mat leave and
transitioning back into work.

429
00:34:34,983 --> 00:34:41,247
And I mean, the stories that, and it's come out of this story where she was let go when
she was pregnant.

430
00:34:41,247 --> 00:34:48,512
And the number of stories that have come out from other women who have said that the exact
same thing has happened to them is remarkable.

431
00:34:48,873 --> 00:34:55,149
And a lot of women unfortunately can't talk about it because if there was like legal stuff
that came about it, you usually have to sign a piece of paper.

432
00:34:55,149 --> 00:34:55,963
Right.

433
00:34:56,952 --> 00:34:58,023
But you're absolutely right.

434
00:34:58,023 --> 00:35:08,907
I mentioned that all to say that it's very prevalent in terms of changes in your career
and having a lack of support around that.

435
00:35:08,947 --> 00:35:18,932
That can lead to termination, absolutely to burnout, to women just deciding to move
companies at the very least.

436
00:35:20,272 --> 00:35:21,342
And you're right.

437
00:35:21,342 --> 00:35:24,333
I knew nothing about it before I became a mother, nothing.

438
00:35:24,333 --> 00:35:26,958
Yeah, yeah, I can imagine.

439
00:35:26,958 --> 00:35:28,632
mean, that's the point I'm at, right?

440
00:35:28,632 --> 00:35:29,693
And I think...

441
00:35:30,991 --> 00:35:44,026
It's, as you mentioned, there are now resources that exist and although they can't fully
prepare somebody for that, or perhaps they can, as to the point about your past lead, I

442
00:35:44,026 --> 00:35:47,618
mean, she created a business, so obviously she has the resources to help with that.

443
00:35:48,358 --> 00:35:54,781
But in terms of network, even just the supportive check-in can go a very long way, right?

444
00:35:54,781 --> 00:35:56,762
Making sure that everybody is okay.

445
00:35:56,762 --> 00:35:59,543
And also, I think one thing that...

446
00:35:59,951 --> 00:36:09,091
I've noticed with a lot of our, you the clients that we work with is don't assume if
someone's having a bad day that you know why, or if they're having a string of bad days

447
00:36:09,091 --> 00:36:12,871
that you know why, because you don't know what's going on.

448
00:36:12,871 --> 00:36:14,491
You don't know what's going on in their personal life.

449
00:36:14,491 --> 00:36:25,891
And rather than assume anything about performance or about, you know, anything personally,
a check-in is a perfect way to offer support and to find out what's going on.

450
00:36:25,891 --> 00:36:29,011
If there is anything you can do to support in that moment.

451
00:36:29,905 --> 00:36:30,248
yeah.

452
00:36:30,248 --> 00:36:31,633
often gets overlooked.

453
00:36:32,886 --> 00:36:33,456
No, you're right.

454
00:36:33,456 --> 00:36:36,287
It is a simple thing, but it means a whole lot.

455
00:36:36,287 --> 00:36:46,445
think there was like, checked in with me once and I just bawled crying because I had, just
because something was happening on my journey that was not easy to deal with and she had

456
00:36:46,445 --> 00:36:47,030
no idea.

457
00:36:47,030 --> 00:36:48,296
had no idea.

458
00:36:48,356 --> 00:36:50,337
And I wouldn't have said anything if she hadn't asked.

459
00:36:50,337 --> 00:36:51,375
So absolutely.

460
00:36:51,375 --> 00:36:52,705
Right, right, exactly.

461
00:36:52,705 --> 00:36:55,496
It comes back to being an empathetic leader.

462
00:36:56,637 --> 00:36:57,937
Full circle.

463
00:36:58,938 --> 00:36:59,738
fantastic.

464
00:36:59,738 --> 00:37:11,913
I I think that you've given us a lot of lessons, a lot of learnings, and a lot of things
for people to really sink their teeth in and take away as to how to navigate, first of

465
00:37:11,913 --> 00:37:12,603
all,

466
00:37:13,677 --> 00:37:21,915
changes in environment and changes in team structure, changes in focus at the end of the
day.

467
00:37:21,915 --> 00:37:34,887
And so one final question for you is if you could impart one critical soft skill to any
emerging or newer people leaders, what would it be and why?

468
00:37:38,139 --> 00:37:43,202
I would probably use this opportunity to plug the book Crucial Conversations.

469
00:37:44,843 --> 00:37:55,429
my gosh, like the number, like people working together don't always, like there's often
just interpersonal conflict and it's often because of miscommunication and

470
00:37:55,429 --> 00:37:56,849
misinterpretation.

471
00:37:57,190 --> 00:38:05,254
And that book is so good at just teaching how to have a hard conversation with someone
when there is.

472
00:38:05,272 --> 00:38:06,242
tension, right?

473
00:38:06,242 --> 00:38:09,263
Tension should exist, should exist between certain roles.

474
00:38:09,263 --> 00:38:10,864
Like it should be healthy tension.

475
00:38:10,864 --> 00:38:14,044
I work in marketing, there should be healthy tension between me and sales.

476
00:38:14,164 --> 00:38:17,805
There should be healthy tension between me and, and, and finance.

477
00:38:17,886 --> 00:38:24,567
But when there's unhealthy tension, and it's, you know, people are starting to take things
personally, or have you, it happens a lot.

478
00:38:24,567 --> 00:38:34,600
And especially also in a, in a remote environment, so much is lost in how we communicate,
because there's the lack of body language that you can't read and all that kind of stuff.

479
00:38:35,270 --> 00:38:43,622
The number of times I have had this conversation with people in terms of just coaching,
like, this is how you have this conversation.

480
00:38:43,622 --> 00:38:48,904
And I've done it myself and it's, it's been invaluable.

481
00:38:48,904 --> 00:39:02,027
And the amount of energy that could get sucked up with dealing with all these feelings and
interpretations, which sometimes can just be flat out wrong.

482
00:39:02,027 --> 00:39:04,222
Sometimes aren't, but sometimes some...

483
00:39:04,222 --> 00:39:07,164
often are, is incredible.

484
00:39:07,164 --> 00:39:19,281
And the release that happens after you have had a hard conversation in a positive in a
constructive way, being like addressing it head on, but not in an emotional way, taking

485
00:39:19,281 --> 00:39:25,764
the emotion out of it and focusing on like the facts, how you've interpreted them and how
you're feeling about it, and then giving benefit of the doubt.

486
00:39:25,764 --> 00:39:27,755
That's like basically the formula.

487
00:39:29,356 --> 00:39:31,578
It's it's come up so much.

488
00:39:31,578 --> 00:39:32,778
And it and it

489
00:39:33,462 --> 00:39:42,501
The number of times it's come up and then the amount of energy it sucks up and then
releases that to me has been like probably like one of the things I would I would say is

490
00:39:42,501 --> 00:39:46,445
like been the biggest learning for me and which is again just how you deal with people.

491
00:39:46,445 --> 00:39:47,275
Yes.

492
00:39:47,456 --> 00:39:48,076
fantastic.

493
00:39:48,076 --> 00:39:50,237
Yeah, I love that.

494
00:39:50,237 --> 00:39:58,381
And it's I mean, you're constantly going to be in conflict in some form of conflict
because conflict can be positive, just like you've mentioned.

495
00:39:58,381 --> 00:40:05,894
I love the way you put this healthy tension, healthy tension exists and not all tension is
is combative.

496
00:40:05,894 --> 00:40:16,409
Not all tension needs a large solution, but it can simply boil down to a conflict, a
resetting of expectations, an understanding of the other person.

497
00:40:16,409 --> 00:40:21,294
in and as you said to give somebody the benefit of the doubt as well.

498
00:40:22,496 --> 00:40:24,158
Amazing, amazing.

499
00:40:24,158 --> 00:40:29,384
I thank you so so much for taking the time today for chatting with me.

500
00:40:29,384 --> 00:40:34,128
I really appreciate it and just wondering where can people find you?

501
00:40:34,229 --> 00:40:35,951
How can they connect with you?

502
00:40:36,334 --> 00:40:38,296
Sure, find me on LinkedIn.

503
00:40:38,517 --> 00:40:42,101
I'm probably the only Cy of O'Neill out there.

504
00:40:42,522 --> 00:40:47,408
If not one of the few, please feel free to look me up on LinkedIn.

505
00:40:47,689 --> 00:40:48,931
Yeah, would love to connect.

506
00:40:48,931 --> 00:40:49,635
Beautiful.

507
00:40:49,635 --> 00:40:52,929
Thank you again and looking forward to future conversations.

508
00:40:53,592 --> 00:40:55,093
Great, thank you so much.

509
00:40:57,045 --> 00:40:58,592
Okay.

510
00:41:00,419 --> 00:41:01,321
Good.

511
00:41:01,321 --> 00:41:05,130
How it should be just finishing uploading, but how do you feel?