WEBVTT NOTE This file was generated by Descript 00:00:00.170 --> 00:00:01.120 Rupert Isaacson: Thanks for joining us. 00:00:01.190 --> 00:00:03.230 Welcome to Live Free, Ride Free. 00:00:03.410 --> 00:00:06.810 I'm your host, Rupert Isaacson, New York Times bestselling author of 00:00:06.830 --> 00:00:08.389 The Horseboy and The Long Ride Home. 00:00:08.450 --> 00:00:13.089 Before I jump in with today's guest, I want to say a huge thank you to you, our 00:00:13.089 --> 00:00:14.989 audience, for helping to make this happen. 00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:15.949 I have a request. 00:00:16.219 --> 00:00:19.750 If you like what we do here, please give it a thumbs up, 00:00:19.799 --> 00:00:22.380 like, subscribe, tell a friend. 00:00:22.770 --> 00:00:24.910 It really, really helps us to make the pro. 00:00:24.910 --> 00:00:28.930 To find out about our certification courses, online video libraries, 00:00:29.435 --> 00:00:33.325 books, and other courses, please go to rupertisaacson.com. 00:00:34.894 --> 00:00:36.125 So now let's jump in. 00:00:36.775 --> 00:00:38.065 Welcome back to the show. 00:00:38.095 --> 00:00:40.105 Today I've got John Kippen. 00:00:40.405 --> 00:00:41.515 Here's a question for you. 00:00:41.694 --> 00:00:43.254 For listeners and viewers. 00:00:43.705 --> 00:00:47.394 Have you ever been forced to go into hiding? 00:00:48.535 --> 00:00:52.315 Have you ever felt that you've been forced to go into hiding? 00:00:53.904 --> 00:01:02.695 Well, what would you do if that happened to you and how would you come out of it? 00:01:03.474 --> 00:01:04.614 Would you come out of it? 00:01:06.445 --> 00:01:07.585 If you came out of it? 00:01:09.190 --> 00:01:13.375 What would you do with the rest of your life? 00:01:16.074 --> 00:01:17.185 It's worth considering. 00:01:17.634 --> 00:01:22.834 John Kippen, who is here, has had that experience and I'm, without giving 00:01:22.834 --> 00:01:27.634 too much away, I think his story. 00:01:29.089 --> 00:01:35.470 Puts a lot of our own stories into perspective and now of course he's a 00:01:35.470 --> 00:01:38.589 resilience coach but it was not always. 00:01:38.589 --> 00:01:41.740 So John, thank you for coming on the show. 00:01:41.949 --> 00:01:44.500 Can you tell us who you are, what you did? 00:01:44.500 --> 00:01:45.250 What's your story? 00:01:45.250 --> 00:01:46.030 How did you get here? 00:01:47.630 --> 00:01:49.100 John Kippen: Thank you for having me here. 00:01:49.850 --> 00:01:50.960 My name is John Gibbon. 00:01:51.260 --> 00:01:52.910 I live in Los Angeles. 00:01:52.980 --> 00:01:54.030 Born and raised here. 00:01:54.670 --> 00:02:00.680 Born to two great parents, both attorneys and I got interested in theater at a 00:02:00.710 --> 00:02:06.840 young age and that really taught me how to be present, think creatively. 00:02:08.640 --> 00:02:13.260 My uncle pulled a quarter out of my ear at the age of five and I 00:02:13.260 --> 00:02:18.090 got introduced to Magic and 'cause I was a creative problem solver. 00:02:18.190 --> 00:02:23.800 Looked at it as a challenge, looked at it as something that I could be good at, and 00:02:23.850 --> 00:02:27.780 magic kind of appears throughout my life. 00:02:28.420 --> 00:02:28.960 In and out. 00:02:30.500 --> 00:02:32.720 I went to a woodsy high school. 00:02:32.780 --> 00:02:33.920 Parents had some money. 00:02:34.370 --> 00:02:37.850 Was classmates with a lot of celebrities. 00:02:37.850 --> 00:02:44.240 Kids didn't phase me, you know, it was just my up upbringing and 00:02:44.240 --> 00:02:46.010 an upper middle class family. 00:02:47.690 --> 00:02:52.079 Went to college, studied theater again got interested in computers, 00:02:52.079 --> 00:02:57.030 started a computer consulting company and everything was going really well. 00:02:57.329 --> 00:03:02.070 Was in a relationship and I was, I was happy, you know, I didn't want 00:03:02.070 --> 00:03:06.210 for anything, you know, it was I was always the guy that was impossible to 00:03:06.210 --> 00:03:09.390 buy a gift for because when I would see something, I would just buy it. 00:03:10.874 --> 00:03:17.054 So, but back in 2002, the summer of 2002, I started having dizziness 00:03:17.054 --> 00:03:21.914 symptoms, searing issues, and they started to get very severe. 00:03:22.754 --> 00:03:27.995 So I went and took me about a couple weeks to get an appointment and so 00:03:27.995 --> 00:03:32.704 forth, but I get an MRI and the doctor saw a four and a half centimeter 00:03:32.704 --> 00:03:34.234 acoustic neuroma brain tumor. 00:03:35.045 --> 00:03:37.475 Good news is, it's benign. 00:03:38.795 --> 00:03:41.734 Bad news is it was killing me by displacing my brainstem. 00:03:42.755 --> 00:03:49.465 And I remember going to the specialist downtown LA sat on the, the examining 00:03:49.465 --> 00:03:53.575 table and I was squirming so I could hear the tissue paper under my bum, 00:03:53.575 --> 00:03:57.550 as you would say, kind of tearing and revving as he looked at the MRI. 00:03:59.140 --> 00:04:03.700 And then he called in a neurosurgeon who came in and they looked at it together 00:04:03.700 --> 00:04:08.890 for a moment and the neurosurgeon left and the, the otologist turned around and 00:04:08.890 --> 00:04:12.430 said, John, you have a four and a half centimeter brain tumor and killing you. 00:04:12.970 --> 00:04:17.350 I pushed another patient and we're operating this coming Friday. 00:04:18.160 --> 00:04:19.840 You're gonna go death in your left ear. 00:04:20.290 --> 00:04:23.800 There's a chance for some residual facial weakness. 00:04:24.100 --> 00:04:26.230 We're gonna do everything we can to prevent that. 00:04:28.510 --> 00:04:29.650 And then he left the room 00:04:30.965 --> 00:04:31.185 and 00:04:32.290 --> 00:04:37.360 I sat there alone, not having taken notes. 00:04:38.860 --> 00:04:40.090 And it was like a whirlwind. 00:04:40.090 --> 00:04:41.530 What, what did he just say? 00:04:41.980 --> 00:04:43.540 He has to do brain surgery. 00:04:43.540 --> 00:04:47.410 There's not a pill or a shot or a whatever. 00:04:51.220 --> 00:04:56.290 But I've always been my own medical advocate, so I exited the room and. 00:04:56.875 --> 00:04:59.185 Heard his voice and I brought him back to the room and said, 00:04:59.185 --> 00:05:00.775 I'm sorry, doc, we weren't done. 00:05:01.795 --> 00:05:05.935 And I proceeded to rattle off the questions that came to my mind, but 00:05:06.535 --> 00:05:11.965 I knew I didn't ask any of the right questions because I didn't know 00:05:12.475 --> 00:05:15.055 the mystery I was about to go into. 00:05:17.275 --> 00:05:23.035 Fast forward four or five days through me after I had gotten my affairs in order and 00:05:23.335 --> 00:05:28.975 found one of my consultants who work for me to take over the company at lease for a 00:05:28.975 --> 00:05:35.045 month or two I found myself on a gurney at 6:00 AM one morning rolling into surgery 00:05:36.095 --> 00:05:41.495 and the nurse stopped the gurney and said, John, would you like us to shave your 00:05:41.495 --> 00:05:44.735 head now or after you're under anesthesia? 00:05:44.735 --> 00:05:46.805 And I said, please, under. 00:05:48.125 --> 00:05:52.105 So, the next thing I know, they're asking me to count backwards from five. 00:05:52.930 --> 00:05:56.380 Four, three, and I'm out. 00:05:58.270 --> 00:06:03.400 And the next thing you know, I'm trying to wake up and it's like I'm 20 meters under 00:06:03.400 --> 00:06:06.550 the ocean trying to swim to the surface. 00:06:07.300 --> 00:06:10.855 And I can hear these faint calls of my name John. 00:06:12.245 --> 00:06:13.495 John wake up. 00:06:15.250 --> 00:06:18.910 And as it came to, I realized it was my dad's voice. 00:06:19.480 --> 00:06:22.660 My dad was sitting on the side of the bed holding my hand 00:06:22.660 --> 00:06:26.800 smiling, but I didn't see my mom. 00:06:26.860 --> 00:06:28.630 And we had a really close relationship. 00:06:28.630 --> 00:06:31.810 So I asked my dad for my glasses. 00:06:31.810 --> 00:06:34.420 And as I tried to put them on, I realized my head was bandage. 00:06:34.420 --> 00:06:39.400 So that was difficult, but I managed to get them kind of on my head. 00:06:39.400 --> 00:06:46.270 And I looked at my mom's face and the look on her face was one of our, what did 00:06:46.270 --> 00:06:49.240 these butchers do to my four son's face? 00:06:50.380 --> 00:06:51.340 And after much. 00:06:52.045 --> 00:06:58.855 Thinking about it and reflection, I realized that that reaction my 00:06:58.855 --> 00:07:06.175 mom had to my face was what sent me into that negative self-talk, that 00:07:06.205 --> 00:07:12.085 negative space, that I wasn't good looking, I wasn't pretty enough, 00:07:12.115 --> 00:07:13.945 I wasn't worthy of being loved. 00:07:14.535 --> 00:07:16.665 And that's what sent, set me into hiding. 00:07:18.645 --> 00:07:21.765 And fortunately, I worked outta my home. 00:07:21.765 --> 00:07:28.845 So I let it be kind of my crutch and I didn't need to go out and I 00:07:28.845 --> 00:07:35.055 miss so many celebrations, birthday parties, funerals, reunions. 00:07:36.075 --> 00:07:42.945 'cause I didn't want people to see the new John and have questions, have just 00:07:43.485 --> 00:07:44.955 who knows what they were thinking. 00:07:46.155 --> 00:07:48.225 And it was easier just to stay at home. 00:07:50.670 --> 00:07:54.900 That's kind of the answer of how I got into that hiding state. 00:07:56.100 --> 00:07:57.330 Rupert Isaacson: That went on a long time though. 00:07:57.360 --> 00:07:58.170 I mean, 12 years. 00:07:58.980 --> 00:08:04.380 12 years before, you know, a certain, even like two to four year period, 00:08:04.380 --> 00:08:06.360 but 12 years, it's a long time. 00:08:07.260 --> 00:08:10.320 John Kippen: It was, you know, I, I just focused on my business. 00:08:10.470 --> 00:08:10.800 Yeah. 00:08:10.960 --> 00:08:15.750 I could speak to people on the phone and you know, my business suffered 00:08:15.750 --> 00:08:20.340 because I was the name of the business and clients wanted me, wanted to see me. 00:08:20.340 --> 00:08:23.910 And there were a few clients that I had a special relationship 00:08:23.910 --> 00:08:25.020 that I would go and see. 00:08:25.290 --> 00:08:25.470 Mm-hmm. 00:08:26.370 --> 00:08:28.810 One of 'em was actually Jamie Lee Curtis. 00:08:29.290 --> 00:08:29.650 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 00:08:30.010 --> 00:08:35.110 John Kippen: And I had been introduced her by her assistant and she knew me before 00:08:35.110 --> 00:08:37.120 my brain tumor and after my brain tumor. 00:08:38.080 --> 00:08:39.280 Rupert Isaacson: What were you doing for her? 00:08:40.100 --> 00:08:40.300 John Kippen: It 00:08:40.890 --> 00:08:41.180 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 00:08:41.180 --> 00:08:41.300 So 00:08:41.300 --> 00:08:42.795 John Kippen: helping her with her computer. 00:08:43.185 --> 00:08:43.665 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 00:08:44.925 --> 00:08:46.635 On, on a personal level or on a business 00:08:46.635 --> 00:08:47.055 John Kippen: level, 00:08:47.535 --> 00:08:47.745 Rupert Isaacson: sort 00:08:47.745 --> 00:08:47.805 John Kippen: of? 00:08:47.805 --> 00:08:49.695 Well, it started out as a business level. 00:08:49.995 --> 00:08:50.355 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 00:08:50.805 --> 00:08:55.905 John Kippen: And as I started sharing, there were a lot of times 00:08:55.905 --> 00:08:59.985 where she would sit by me as I was working on her computer and there 00:08:59.985 --> 00:09:04.095 would be downtime while a software updated or why something installed. 00:09:04.095 --> 00:09:13.595 So we had a chance to talk and it's like she saw through me and kind of adopted me. 00:09:13.595 --> 00:09:16.235 You know, she's the mother of two adopted children. 00:09:16.835 --> 00:09:17.255 Okay. 00:09:17.855 --> 00:09:20.765 And it felt like she wanted to comfort me. 00:09:20.765 --> 00:09:22.865 She wanted to support me. 00:09:24.035 --> 00:09:30.485 And she has in the last we met in 2000, so the last 25 years 00:09:31.355 --> 00:09:33.245 and she is a cheerleader of mine. 00:09:33.905 --> 00:09:36.365 She's we get together periodically. 00:09:36.365 --> 00:09:39.755 We talk on the phone a lot, even though she's the busiest 00:09:39.755 --> 00:09:41.075 human being in the world. 00:09:42.545 --> 00:09:46.485 And I have so many stories I could share about Jamie, but she was one of 00:09:46.515 --> 00:09:49.185 the people who helped me realize that 00:09:51.765 --> 00:09:55.185 my facial difference didn't need to define me if I didn't let it. 00:09:55.905 --> 00:09:56.325 Yeah. 00:09:57.465 --> 00:09:59.005 And also I, 00:10:01.045 --> 00:10:05.925 I we found, found again, my love performing magic. 00:10:07.155 --> 00:10:10.755 And in Los Angeles is a private club called the Magic Castle, 00:10:11.564 --> 00:10:13.995 where magicians perform for guests. 00:10:15.015 --> 00:10:15.975 Is, is that in 00:10:15.975 --> 00:10:16.635 Rupert Isaacson: Disneyland? 00:10:17.295 --> 00:10:18.330 No, it's in Hollywood. 00:10:19.439 --> 00:10:20.729 There's another magic. 00:10:20.819 --> 00:10:22.260 Am I mixing it up then? 00:10:22.530 --> 00:10:22.800 John Kippen: No. 00:10:22.800 --> 00:10:24.824 There's a magic castle in Disneyland as well. 00:10:25.025 --> 00:10:26.040 I, it's not, I thought the Magicians 00:10:26.040 --> 00:10:32.130 Rupert Isaacson: Union also had a, something going on in that castle 00:10:32.130 --> 00:10:34.050 in Disneyland, or am I wrong? 00:10:35.010 --> 00:10:37.395 No, that's not, it's okay. 00:10:37.589 --> 00:10:38.010 John Kippen: The Magic 00:10:38.010 --> 00:10:38.714 Rupert Isaacson: Castle is just 00:10:38.775 --> 00:10:42.959 John Kippen: mixing it up entrance to a certain area of Disneyland. 00:10:43.170 --> 00:10:43.439 Rupert Isaacson: Right. 00:10:43.439 --> 00:10:46.639 The reason I know this, by the way, is someone else who's been a guest on the 00:10:46.639 --> 00:10:53.810 show, Leanna Tank, who's a colleague of mine, her grandfather was I think the 00:10:53.810 --> 00:10:58.609 head of the American Magicians, is it? 00:10:58.609 --> 00:10:58.969 Union? 00:10:58.994 --> 00:10:59.484 Society. 00:10:59.989 --> 00:11:00.530 Society. 00:11:00.530 --> 00:11:03.290 And because of that, she's actually been invited. 00:11:03.695 --> 00:11:07.325 To go to the Magic Castle this year, ah, special thing, 00:11:07.325 --> 00:11:08.555 and was telling me about it. 00:11:08.675 --> 00:11:12.695 I think I mixed it up with, I think she has to take her kid to Disneyland as well, 00:11:12.695 --> 00:11:15.965 and I, I thought that there was a Disney connection, but clearly there isn't. 00:11:16.235 --> 00:11:19.985 But, okay, so you've sent me straight, but I do know that this is a big deal. 00:11:20.015 --> 00:11:21.905 I do know that the Magic Castle is, 00:11:23.645 --> 00:11:23.735 John Kippen: I'm 00:11:23.735 --> 00:11:24.275 Rupert Isaacson: quite it's 00:11:24.275 --> 00:11:25.625 John Kippen: a mecca of magic. 00:11:25.685 --> 00:11:31.865 You know, it's where magicians go to learn to support each other and to perform, 00:11:31.895 --> 00:11:35.735 you know, for the, while I was a member, I'm not currently a member, but while I 00:11:35.735 --> 00:11:44.145 was a member I would go, I, I would start one night a week and before I had the 00:11:44.145 --> 00:11:50.565 confidence of having put together 20 or 30 minutes of material, I would kind of lurk 00:11:50.565 --> 00:11:55.665 around and, and watch other magicians and saw the joy that audiences were feeling 00:11:55.665 --> 00:11:58.345 when they were experiencing the magic. 00:11:59.425 --> 00:12:01.015 I so wanted to do that. 00:12:01.015 --> 00:12:02.755 I so wanted to bring people joy. 00:12:03.775 --> 00:12:09.525 So I finally got the nerve to sit at one of the impromptu tables with my deck of 00:12:09.525 --> 00:12:14.025 cards in hand, and people would approach the table and I would start performing. 00:12:14.025 --> 00:12:19.714 And, and it was an amazing experience, but I started to realize that people 00:12:19.714 --> 00:12:22.294 were distracted by my facial paralysis. 00:12:22.564 --> 00:12:22.984 Mm. 00:12:23.224 --> 00:12:26.014 Not in a negative way, they just were curious. 00:12:26.194 --> 00:12:26.224 Mm. 00:12:27.244 --> 00:12:28.504 Oh, I wonder, did he have a stroke? 00:12:28.504 --> 00:12:29.494 He's a big guy. 00:12:29.499 --> 00:12:29.869 Mm-hmm. 00:12:30.094 --> 00:12:31.474 Did he have Bell's Palsy? 00:12:32.104 --> 00:12:32.464 Mm, why? 00:12:32.469 --> 00:12:36.424 And and I found that those distractions kept them from being 00:12:36.424 --> 00:12:40.444 in the moment and enjoying the magic and enjoying my stories. 00:12:42.064 --> 00:12:44.944 So I changed my opening, my act, and I said, guys, welcome. 00:12:46.054 --> 00:12:48.364 My name is John, and I'm gonna do magic all my life. 00:12:49.354 --> 00:12:52.114 But in 2002, I was diagnosed with a brain tumor. 00:12:52.550 --> 00:12:55.430 And when they removed it, they traumatized my facial neuro. 00:12:57.499 --> 00:13:03.229 But as I recovered, I realized I had acquired some new skills. 00:13:04.369 --> 00:13:05.329 And then I would wait. 00:13:06.530 --> 00:13:09.469 I would wait for the audiences, get on the edge of their chairs, 00:13:09.469 --> 00:13:14.780 wondering what possible skills I could acquire from having brain surgery. 00:13:15.890 --> 00:13:21.290 And then I would look to my right and my left, and I would whisper in a loud voice. 00:13:21.290 --> 00:13:26.390 Guys, I am able to visualize people's thoughts. 00:13:27.800 --> 00:13:28.369 Well done. 00:13:29.750 --> 00:13:30.410 You know? 00:13:31.430 --> 00:13:33.290 And that's where the idea of 00:13:35.810 --> 00:13:40.160 performing magic and making a connection with people became my superpower. 00:13:40.609 --> 00:13:41.119 Hmm. 00:13:42.589 --> 00:13:47.390 And what would happen is the audience would look beyond my face and into my 00:13:47.390 --> 00:13:51.109 heart and intently listen to my stories. 00:13:52.339 --> 00:13:58.129 Because all my magic I made about you as the spectator, it wasn't about me. 00:14:00.529 --> 00:14:06.259 And audiences started to feel comfortable around me, especially women. 00:14:06.289 --> 00:14:09.949 You know, they was, it was, you know, I was always shy, I was 00:14:09.949 --> 00:14:15.379 always, you know, self-confident, not confident around women, 00:14:17.929 --> 00:14:24.229 but me being my authentic self allowed women to open their hearts to me, 00:14:26.389 --> 00:14:30.139 and that was one of the greatest gifts I received from performing magic. 00:14:31.839 --> 00:14:37.240 I started to have people come to me and tell me their stories of what 00:14:37.240 --> 00:14:39.310 they were dealing with in their lives. 00:14:40.329 --> 00:14:44.650 What, I don't know how many people were saying they were fighting cancer. 00:14:45.595 --> 00:14:52.195 Or they had just had a terrible breakup or whatever they were, they, they 00:14:52.195 --> 00:15:00.415 found that they could share those deep dark secrets with me because 00:15:00.415 --> 00:15:02.785 they knew I had been in similar shoes. 00:15:03.955 --> 00:15:08.395 They knew that I had come out the other side and I was now wearing my 00:15:08.395 --> 00:15:13.045 adversity on my sleeve and wearing my true adversity on my face. 00:15:13.975 --> 00:15:14.275 Mm-hmm. 00:15:14.455 --> 00:15:16.285 And they were just drawn to me. 00:15:16.885 --> 00:15:17.185 Mm-hmm. 00:15:17.845 --> 00:15:26.335 And as I supported them through the magic I could see them to start to smile and I 00:15:26.335 --> 00:15:31.255 realized at a minimum I was distracting them from whatever they're dealing with. 00:15:32.905 --> 00:15:38.064 There was one night I was upstairs at the Magic Castle and I was just looking 00:15:38.064 --> 00:15:41.485 for a great group to do the show and me. 00:15:42.745 --> 00:15:46.495 And this woman all dressed in baggy black clothes with a hat 00:15:47.545 --> 00:15:52.915 that reminded me of Witch's Hat was walking down the hallway as she 00:15:52.915 --> 00:15:54.745 approached and said, hi, how are you? 00:15:55.405 --> 00:16:00.655 She stopped, but the look on her face was just saying, just leave me alone. 00:16:01.585 --> 00:16:04.495 And then she kept walking downstairs to catch up with a group. 00:16:06.235 --> 00:16:09.265 Well, I followed her and I caught up with the group and I said, 00:16:09.265 --> 00:16:10.645 guys, are you having a good time? 00:16:13.975 --> 00:16:15.735 And guys, are you having a good time? 00:16:15.735 --> 00:16:16.815 And they said, yeah. 00:16:17.175 --> 00:16:19.905 I said, yeah, but have you seen any good closeup magic? 00:16:20.775 --> 00:16:21.195 They said, 00:16:21.385 --> 00:16:21.835 Rupert Isaacson: No, 00:16:21.835 --> 00:16:22.405 John Kippen: not really. 00:16:22.405 --> 00:16:23.605 I said, come on, let's go. 00:16:24.205 --> 00:16:27.745 And I went over to a little green table in the corner that had green 00:16:27.835 --> 00:16:32.465 melt on it and we all sat down and I put the woman dressed in black. 00:16:32.855 --> 00:16:33.815 Her name was Darren. 00:16:33.815 --> 00:16:34.745 I put her to my right. 00:16:35.975 --> 00:16:38.045 And I knew that something was bothering her. 00:16:38.045 --> 00:16:41.375 I didn't know what it was, but my goal for that interaction 00:16:41.375 --> 00:16:43.115 was just to make her smile. 00:16:44.405 --> 00:16:46.475 And I made the magic all about her. 00:16:46.925 --> 00:16:49.355 Every magical moment happened because she did something. 00:16:49.355 --> 00:16:52.295 She said something, she thought of something she predicted. 00:16:54.820 --> 00:17:01.205 And all of a sudden within minutes, Darren started to smile and she sat up straight 00:17:02.765 --> 00:17:07.355 and she removed that funny looking hat and her eyes started to sparkle. 00:17:08.135 --> 00:17:11.345 And I knew whatever baggage she brought with her that night was gone. 00:17:12.455 --> 00:17:18.125 So I finished the show 25, 30 minutes and normally audiences applaud and 00:17:18.125 --> 00:17:19.835 then they move on to something else. 00:17:21.815 --> 00:17:23.195 But this group wanted more. 00:17:25.565 --> 00:17:28.415 So I shared the story about how I had hit from cameras and 00:17:28.415 --> 00:17:30.845 mirrors for almost 12 years. 00:17:31.535 --> 00:17:33.305 'cause I didn't like the way I looked. 00:17:34.715 --> 00:17:41.105 I didn't feel comfortable in my own skin, and it was easier to hide than it was 00:17:41.105 --> 00:17:43.835 to explain why my face was paralyzed. 00:17:45.485 --> 00:17:50.915 And that all changed August 3rd, 2017, when I went to my first magic invention 00:17:50.915 --> 00:17:55.685 in Las Vegas called Magic Live, when I was amongst the greatest minds in magic. 00:17:57.245 --> 00:18:01.565 And I finally got fed up and I said, John, you need to take pictures 00:18:01.955 --> 00:18:04.325 with these amazing magicians. 00:18:05.585 --> 00:18:09.425 And I started walking around and every magician I recognized I went up to and 00:18:09.425 --> 00:18:11.525 I handed my phone to another person. 00:18:11.525 --> 00:18:12.305 I said, do you need a favor? 00:18:12.635 --> 00:18:13.355 Take our photo. 00:18:15.065 --> 00:18:20.105 And after the week of magic, I had dozens and dozens of photos of me 00:18:20.105 --> 00:18:24.754 with great minds in magic, and I got home and I was uploading the photos 00:18:24.754 --> 00:18:26.254 to my computer to organize 'em. 00:18:26.254 --> 00:18:30.605 And it dawned on me if these great minds in magic had no 00:18:30.605 --> 00:18:32.195 trouble taking a picture with me. 00:18:33.125 --> 00:18:34.385 What was my problem? 00:18:36.215 --> 00:18:41.195 And that was when I realized that I was really approachable, likable, 00:18:41.225 --> 00:18:44.075 despite my facial paralysis. 00:18:48.125 --> 00:18:48.785 I'm bothering you. 00:18:48.785 --> 00:18:52.055 I don't think you have, I was wondering a good, a question or not, 00:18:52.055 --> 00:18:54.315 Rupert Isaacson: but well, you reminded me of a friend of mine. 00:18:54.945 --> 00:19:00.505 You reminded me, a friend of mine called Jay, who runs a an equine 00:19:00.505 --> 00:19:04.585 therapy and outdoor therapy unit up in the highlands of Scotland. 00:19:04.585 --> 00:19:10.405 He's an ex-Marine, British Marine, got his face blown off in 00:19:11.005 --> 00:19:20.875 Afghanistan, and, and he describes a, a process of losing your identity. 00:19:22.285 --> 00:19:26.425 Because your face is your identity uhhuh to a large degree. 00:19:27.115 --> 00:19:28.675 That's just how the human 00:19:30.745 --> 00:19:31.735 anatomy is. 00:19:32.305 --> 00:19:34.105 Cognitive anatomy is set up. 00:19:34.825 --> 00:19:35.965 Our eyes are in front. 00:19:36.085 --> 00:19:39.820 We communicate most of 00:19:41.990 --> 00:19:46.345 what we want to convey emotionally through facial expression. 00:19:47.515 --> 00:19:56.785 He, he describes going from a sort of quite cocky, good looking action, 00:19:56.785 --> 00:20:03.055 man, to the man with no face to the man with a face that was being 00:20:03.055 --> 00:20:04.765 rebuilt over years and years. 00:20:04.765 --> 00:20:08.185 They had to take, you know, skin from here, fat from there, 00:20:08.185 --> 00:20:08.995 blah, blah, blah, blah, bum. 00:20:09.535 --> 00:20:13.315 And you know, he's got that black humor, British humor. 00:20:13.315 --> 00:20:15.265 So, you know, he'd say, you know, he would go for a drink with his. 00:20:16.090 --> 00:20:16.480 Friends. 00:20:16.480 --> 00:20:21.030 And if he sneezed, you know, his eye would go one way and his his teeth 00:20:21.030 --> 00:20:23.340 would go another way and his nose would land in your point, you know? 00:20:23.790 --> 00:20:27.060 And he would take his nose off sometimes to, to scare people, you know. 00:20:27.060 --> 00:20:33.990 But and then after years, years, they gave him a face and it's, he's, he's actually 00:20:33.990 --> 00:20:37.980 a handsome guy, but it's clear that, you know, you think, oh, he got burned or 00:20:37.980 --> 00:20:44.700 he got, you know, and I what, what you described earlier in the story, where 00:20:47.100 --> 00:20:54.390 before you could be upfront with the story, the paralysis, 00:20:54.390 --> 00:20:56.850 your facial paralysis distracted people from the magic. 00:20:57.630 --> 00:21:04.260 But as soon as you gave them the story, then that was the gateway to the magic. 00:21:04.860 --> 00:21:08.700 Yeah, because we are curious, we cannot not ask those questions. 00:21:08.909 --> 00:21:10.200 And we're also compassionate. 00:21:10.230 --> 00:21:14.340 One of the things which I think is often underestimated about humans, you know, 00:21:14.340 --> 00:21:20.460 it's very easy to talk about the worse aspects of human nature, but we're, 00:21:20.669 --> 00:21:22.500 we're a very loving species actually. 00:21:23.220 --> 00:21:31.320 And usually our curiosity is coming from that rather than from some negative thing. 00:21:31.649 --> 00:21:35.040 I mean, obviously there, there are people out there who do, yes, of course. 00:21:35.100 --> 00:21:39.510 But I would, I would still posit that the vast majority of people come at each 00:21:39.510 --> 00:21:45.120 other from the point of view of conflict resolution and compassion and love. 00:21:45.659 --> 00:21:51.620 And as I'm also the father of an autistic son who was very, very severe. 00:21:51.680 --> 00:21:55.570 And I found that when people didn't understand his behaviors, you 00:21:55.570 --> 00:21:58.025 know, they would be confused, they would be defensive, they would be. 00:21:59.515 --> 00:22:01.885 On the back foot and things could go negative. 00:22:01.885 --> 00:22:07.585 But if I just led with, okay, my son's autistic, he's doing the best he can, 00:22:07.735 --> 00:22:09.205 then everyone would be rooting for him. 00:22:09.205 --> 00:22:12.565 It would just be a matter of effectively giving them the story. 00:22:12.805 --> 00:22:16.695 And I, I, you know, I, those people who know me know that I frequently 00:22:18.155 --> 00:22:23.175 talk about this thing of our species being called homo sapien 00:22:23.175 --> 00:22:25.425 sapiens, meaning the thinking ape. 00:22:25.695 --> 00:22:30.075 But that being a bad description for us, because anything with a brain 00:22:30.075 --> 00:22:33.765 thinks is, you know, thousands of species on the planet with brains. 00:22:33.765 --> 00:22:36.765 Some of them have many brains like octopuses, you know? 00:22:37.605 --> 00:22:45.015 So thinking is not special to us, but we have this larynx talking storytelling 00:22:45.045 --> 00:22:47.805 that's us, that's, we should really be called the storytelling it. 00:22:47.985 --> 00:22:52.185 So of course, as soon as you give people the story, then they're in and what is 00:22:52.185 --> 00:22:54.135 story, but the original healing process. 00:22:54.795 --> 00:23:00.345 So then suddenly your facial paralysis with the story behind it, with the magic 00:23:00.705 --> 00:23:02.805 becomes a shamanic process of healing. 00:23:03.435 --> 00:23:06.795 And that's exactly what you just described with this lady 00:23:06.855 --> 00:23:07.785 who was sitting next to you? 00:23:07.785 --> 00:23:08.175 I think 00:23:09.615 --> 00:23:09.975 John Kippen: so. 00:23:09.985 --> 00:23:13.435 After the show, you know, I, I shared, I shared that story on 00:23:13.435 --> 00:23:15.745 how I came to love myself again. 00:23:17.065 --> 00:23:21.595 And she stood up and she motioned for me to stand, and I did. 00:23:21.595 --> 00:23:25.225 And, but she gave me one of these bear hugs that you don't soon forget. 00:23:25.615 --> 00:23:25.855 Mm-hmm. 00:23:25.855 --> 00:23:26.215 Like, yeah. 00:23:26.215 --> 00:23:28.225 Had you seen a sibling in 20 years? 00:23:28.495 --> 00:23:28.975 Mm-hmm. 00:23:29.725 --> 00:23:33.835 And she was holding on for dear life and after what seemed like minutes, 00:23:33.925 --> 00:23:38.125 it was probably 30 seconds, she stood back and she was crying and 00:23:38.125 --> 00:23:40.795 she looked up and said, John, I, I need to share something with you. 00:23:43.045 --> 00:23:46.435 Four years ago, I had a double mastectomy because I have the BROCO 00:23:46.435 --> 00:23:50.155 one gene, my mom, my aunt, my sister. 00:23:50.725 --> 00:23:53.275 All had their breasts proactively removed. 00:23:53.275 --> 00:23:55.915 And I was the last in the family to do that. 00:23:59.335 --> 00:24:04.555 And when I saw your magic, you know, my friends had drug me here 00:24:05.335 --> 00:24:07.015 'cause I didn't want to be here. 00:24:08.215 --> 00:24:11.005 And they just wouldn't take no for an answer. 00:24:12.505 --> 00:24:19.705 And I was not about to have a good time period just to prove that I was 00:24:19.705 --> 00:24:27.205 right and that I met you and I sat down and you put me on this pedestal. 00:24:27.205 --> 00:24:30.355 You, you made the magic about me. 00:24:32.095 --> 00:24:34.825 And all of a sudden I realized I was smiling and I was 00:24:35.185 --> 00:24:37.105 having a really good time. 00:24:37.105 --> 00:24:39.445 And, and then I heard your story. 00:24:41.185 --> 00:24:46.435 We made me realize in the moment that I've been hiding too by the, the baggy clothes 00:24:46.435 --> 00:24:52.105 and the funny hats and not making eye contact and my sarcastic sense of humor. 00:24:53.665 --> 00:24:57.085 And I think you just saved eight years off my journey of hiding. 00:24:57.715 --> 00:24:58.075 Hmm. 00:24:59.030 --> 00:25:06.385 And she made a promise to herself and her friends and I, as witnesses said that 00:25:06.925 --> 00:25:08.815 would be the last night she would hide. 00:25:10.315 --> 00:25:12.625 And I literally fell back on my chair. 00:25:13.225 --> 00:25:17.005 You know, my expectations with that 30 minutes was just to make her smile. 00:25:17.755 --> 00:25:20.575 I had no idea I would touch her so deeply. 00:25:22.195 --> 00:25:25.285 And she excused herself and went to the bathroom to wash her face. 00:25:25.285 --> 00:25:28.705 And one of her friends was sitting there and when she kicked her 00:25:28.705 --> 00:25:32.365 jaw off the ground, she said, John, you don't, you don't really 00:25:32.365 --> 00:25:33.685 understand what just happened. 00:25:35.065 --> 00:25:36.240 We've known Darren since college. 00:25:37.300 --> 00:25:39.820 We've been supporting her for the last four years. 00:25:39.820 --> 00:25:42.520 She tries to stop hiding. 00:25:43.510 --> 00:25:47.110 But you did in 30 minutes what we've been trying to do for four years. 00:25:48.430 --> 00:25:54.400 And at that moment I understood that my life's calling was to help 00:25:54.400 --> 00:25:56.590 others get out of their own way. 00:25:57.040 --> 00:25:57.430 Mm-hmm. 00:25:57.970 --> 00:26:01.720 It's our own self reflection. 00:26:01.720 --> 00:26:06.910 It's our own view of ourselves that keep us from moving forward and alive. 00:26:09.250 --> 00:26:13.930 And we are the most critical about ourselves, much more than anyone else. 00:26:14.470 --> 00:26:15.220 I don't care. 00:26:16.600 --> 00:26:24.520 But that's one of the lessons that I try to help my coaching clients understand is 00:26:24.520 --> 00:26:27.850 that you're enough just the way you are. 00:26:28.030 --> 00:26:28.510 Yeah. 00:26:29.530 --> 00:26:32.080 You know, and there's, there's always room for improvement. 00:26:32.170 --> 00:26:34.300 There's always room to get better. 00:26:37.780 --> 00:26:44.800 And the best way to learn how to love yourself is first loving others and being 00:26:45.220 --> 00:26:50.920 generous to others and helping people and be that, that voice or reason and be 00:26:50.920 --> 00:26:57.790 that ear that they can share a story and lean their head on your shoulder and just 00:27:00.130 --> 00:27:01.870 listen and be present. 00:27:03.160 --> 00:27:06.160 And that is one of the greatest gifts you can give another human 00:27:06.160 --> 00:27:11.440 being is just to be present in their lives and not judge and just support 00:27:11.440 --> 00:27:13.000 them, become their cheerleader. 00:27:14.590 --> 00:27:19.500 And if more people did that, this world would be a much happier place. 00:27:24.690 --> 00:27:25.410 Rupert Isaacson: So 00:27:27.480 --> 00:27:32.370 now you use magic and your story to reach people and. 00:27:32.805 --> 00:27:33.465 Help people. 00:27:33.465 --> 00:27:35.355 You are, you're quite well known now. 00:27:36.325 --> 00:27:36.345 Thank you. 00:27:42.445 --> 00:27:43.975 Where do you want to go with this? 00:27:44.995 --> 00:27:45.985 It's a real gift 00:27:48.085 --> 00:27:55.555 to be able to give people that sort of instant perspective. 00:27:56.575 --> 00:27:57.805 And I think that 00:28:00.115 --> 00:28:03.085 that's partly because, again, I think this goes, I understand 00:28:03.085 --> 00:28:04.225 this with my friend Jay. 00:28:04.945 --> 00:28:08.605 When it's your face, you can't hide. 00:28:09.595 --> 00:28:09.895 Mm-hmm. 00:28:11.245 --> 00:28:12.745 If it's your breast, you, you can hide. 00:28:12.745 --> 00:28:15.535 If it's some other body part, you can more or less hide. 00:28:16.295 --> 00:28:18.245 If you're missing a limb, you can wear a prosthetic. 00:28:19.175 --> 00:28:21.905 So there's something really powerful I think, in. 00:28:27.200 --> 00:28:33.020 Being the one who carries that vulnerability because you let 00:28:33.020 --> 00:28:35.480 pe other people off the hook for their vulnerabilities. 00:28:35.480 --> 00:28:36.140 Do you know what I mean? 00:28:36.140 --> 00:28:38.390 It it, it allows them 00:28:40.460 --> 00:28:42.500 to A, have some perspective, but b 00:28:45.500 --> 00:28:49.580 say, well, it, if John can get through it, I could probably get through it. 00:28:50.390 --> 00:28:50.690 Yeah, 00:28:50.750 --> 00:28:50.960 John Kippen: yeah, 00:28:51.200 --> 00:28:51.620 Rupert Isaacson: yeah. 00:28:52.700 --> 00:28:56.540 John Kippen: You know, I, I wrote a book called Playing the Hand, you Were Dealt. 00:28:58.070 --> 00:29:02.470 And at the end of this episode, I will give your listeners a link to 00:29:02.470 --> 00:29:04.390 download a PDF version of the book. 00:29:04.415 --> 00:29:04.705 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 00:29:05.800 --> 00:29:06.970 John Kippen: Would you read that sign from it? 00:29:07.565 --> 00:29:11.200 It, it tells my story, but it also, you know, I've always lived 00:29:11.200 --> 00:29:14.800 my life feeling it's better to ask for forgiveness and permission. 00:29:15.520 --> 00:29:15.940 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah. 00:29:16.300 --> 00:29:19.149 John Kippen: And that has bit me in the ass a couple times. 00:29:20.950 --> 00:29:22.659 Rupert Isaacson: Well, I, I, I admit about that myself. 00:29:22.659 --> 00:29:23.020 Yeah. 00:29:23.260 --> 00:29:23.649 John Kippen: Yeah. 00:29:23.740 --> 00:29:27.550 But it's also given me opportunities that I would not have had if 00:29:27.550 --> 00:29:31.570 I didn't just go out and do whatever it was I put my mind to. 00:29:32.649 --> 00:29:37.420 You know, you talk about your face being, your, your signature, you're 00:29:37.420 --> 00:29:39.550 the thing that people foresee. 00:29:40.240 --> 00:29:43.780 You know, I spent 12 plus years learning how not to hide my face. 00:29:44.920 --> 00:29:49.540 And then what happened in March of 2020 COVID hit. 00:29:50.139 --> 00:29:50.649 Hmm. 00:29:51.129 --> 00:29:55.960 And now hiding your face with a face mask became not only politically 00:29:55.960 --> 00:29:59.139 correct, but government mandated. 00:29:59.590 --> 00:30:00.280 Mm-hmm. 00:30:00.700 --> 00:30:06.100 And I sat here thinking about, I'm not gonna undo my healing. 00:30:07.105 --> 00:30:08.605 Because of a global pandemic. 00:30:08.605 --> 00:30:11.725 So I went online and I found a company that would take a 00:30:11.725 --> 00:30:13.945 picture and print it on the mask. 00:30:14.245 --> 00:30:14.695 Okay. 00:30:14.695 --> 00:30:18.595 And I sent them a picture of the lower half of my face and they 00:30:18.595 --> 00:30:20.545 printed it on a half a dozen masks. 00:30:21.475 --> 00:30:24.264 And those are the masks that I would wear when I would be out with 00:30:24.325 --> 00:30:29.004 in public and strangers would look at it and not really understand. 00:30:29.575 --> 00:30:29.845 Sure. 00:30:30.595 --> 00:30:35.274 Friends and family and people who knew me would do a double tank. 00:30:36.264 --> 00:30:39.774 And without saying a word, they truly understood that 00:30:39.774 --> 00:30:41.784 John refuses to hide his face. 00:30:42.205 --> 00:30:42.475 Yeah. 00:30:42.475 --> 00:30:44.215 He went through a global pandemic. 00:30:44.845 --> 00:30:45.235 Yeah. 00:30:45.985 --> 00:30:51.145 And I did that as just a lesson to people look at people's eyes 00:30:51.145 --> 00:30:56.995 first, you know, because you know, and, and there are people like 00:30:56.995 --> 00:30:58.975 your friend Jay, who, who I'm sure. 00:30:59.920 --> 00:31:01.690 Had scars and so forth. 00:31:01.690 --> 00:31:01.780 Mm-hmm. 00:31:02.020 --> 00:31:06.399 But you know, as long as you can open your eyes, people can see into your 00:31:06.399 --> 00:31:12.190 soul through your eyes and your eyes show the expression that your mouth 00:31:12.190 --> 00:31:15.070 or you may not be able to express. 00:31:16.690 --> 00:31:21.800 So, anyway, it's just a, a story that, a thought about that that spoke to 00:31:24.439 --> 00:31:25.760 what you were talking about. 00:31:26.000 --> 00:31:26.419 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah. 00:31:26.419 --> 00:31:27.980 And it's funny what you say about eyes too. 00:31:27.980 --> 00:31:30.379 'cause then I immediately think about people that lose their eyes. 00:31:30.770 --> 00:31:34.760 And I remember when I was at school, there was a boy Alistair, who'd 00:31:34.760 --> 00:31:38.510 lost his eyes and he had glass eyes. 00:31:39.409 --> 00:31:41.149 He'd occasionally take 'em out to freak us out. 00:31:41.689 --> 00:31:41.899 John Kippen: Oh 00:31:41.899 --> 00:31:42.169 Rupert Isaacson: man. 00:31:42.230 --> 00:31:44.889 And he was a lovely bloke. 00:31:47.739 --> 00:31:52.120 You couldn't see his eyes, but you could see his heart. 00:31:52.870 --> 00:31:53.199 John Kippen: Mm-hmm. 00:31:54.955 --> 00:31:56.875 Rupert Isaacson: So it's always, always interesting, isn't it, that 00:31:57.535 --> 00:32:05.615 people if something gets stripped away, it seems to reveal another layer. 00:32:05.975 --> 00:32:10.525 Have another friend, Ginny amazing woman, does incredible things in the world. 00:32:10.605 --> 00:32:15.735 If you're familiar with films like Chasing Ice, chasing Coral, the Social 00:32:15.735 --> 00:32:25.365 Dilemma, she's behind those movies really interesting human and has lost little 00:32:25.365 --> 00:32:27.285 by little all these parts of her body. 00:32:27.795 --> 00:32:30.495 She lost her breasts, she lost her ovaries. 00:32:30.765 --> 00:32:35.025 She lost various parts of various organs battling with this cancer. 00:32:35.025 --> 00:32:36.675 That cancer ended up with. 00:32:36.675 --> 00:32:39.825 Meniere's Disease, you know, where you, your inner ear gets messed 00:32:39.825 --> 00:32:45.045 up and this causes incredible nausea and so on and so on. 00:32:45.525 --> 00:32:46.125 And 00:32:48.225 --> 00:32:48.885 it's like. 00:32:50.910 --> 00:32:56.430 But when you meet her, she comes across as like the most vibrant, 00:32:58.890 --> 00:33:01.350 competent human. 00:33:01.590 --> 00:33:03.390 And yet she's like always on the point of death. 00:33:04.770 --> 00:33:09.300 And then she does more than most other people I know. 00:33:09.690 --> 00:33:14.100 I have another friend, David Doyle in Ireland who's like that always on the 00:33:14.100 --> 00:33:22.350 brink, gets incredible, huge projects done for special needs people all over 00:33:22.620 --> 00:33:27.570 the country there, works at the government level, but was just a, a dad, an autism 00:33:27.570 --> 00:33:34.500 dad who refused to be bad, but has, every time I call him, you know, it's 00:33:34.500 --> 00:33:36.060 like, okay, this thing is happening. 00:33:36.840 --> 00:33:40.340 And I have, there's, there's an interesting concept called the shamanic 00:33:40.340 --> 00:33:47.440 illness where, sometimes it seems that there are certain people who are 00:33:47.440 --> 00:33:53.200 healers and they're sort of required to always be at this point of insane 00:33:53.200 --> 00:34:02.080 vulnerability, which puts them in a place of insane authenticity, which allows 00:34:02.080 --> 00:34:04.930 them to be effective on a level that 00:34:07.600 --> 00:34:10.420 many of us only marvel at. 00:34:12.760 --> 00:34:15.550 If you hadn't had the brain tumor, 00:34:20.415 --> 00:34:21.940 where would your life have gone? 00:34:21.940 --> 00:34:25.030 Or let's say you had had the brain tumor but they'd done the surgery. 00:34:25.930 --> 00:34:28.930 No problem on the face, bounce back. 00:34:28.930 --> 00:34:29.560 Off you go. 00:34:32.860 --> 00:34:36.455 Project your imagination A little bit into that, John, what would that John be? 00:34:40.270 --> 00:34:44.080 John Kippen: Ah, boy, I try not to think about that. 00:34:45.370 --> 00:34:48.370 Many people ask me, John, have you had to do it over again? 00:34:48.880 --> 00:34:53.830 And you could somehow prevent the brain tumor before it affected 00:34:53.830 --> 00:34:55.360 you and needed we removed? 00:34:55.360 --> 00:34:57.850 Would you and I say no? 00:34:58.780 --> 00:34:58.990 Yeah. 00:34:59.620 --> 00:35:05.380 'cause the journey of overcoming my adversity has helped so many people. 00:35:05.950 --> 00:35:06.400 Yeah. 00:35:06.760 --> 00:35:12.340 And given me such strength and compassion. 00:35:12.790 --> 00:35:13.210 Hmm. 00:35:13.600 --> 00:35:16.090 And it's given me the ability to 00:35:18.640 --> 00:35:20.110 see when others are hurting. 00:35:21.910 --> 00:35:27.950 And you know, I, I will, I use Facebook every day and I'm 00:35:27.950 --> 00:35:30.140 addicted to it, I must admit, but. 00:35:31.070 --> 00:35:37.310 I'll have a friend post something on their wall that's out of character, and most 00:35:37.310 --> 00:35:42.800 people who see that will just say, oh, Rupert's having a bad day and move on. 00:35:44.210 --> 00:35:46.940 I stop and I call that person. 00:35:46.970 --> 00:35:48.440 I don't text 'em, I don't email them. 00:35:48.440 --> 00:35:53.420 I call them and I get them on the phone and I say, Hey, Rupert, it, I 00:35:53.420 --> 00:35:57.590 saw that post and it, it just didn't seem like you, what's going on? 00:35:58.460 --> 00:35:59.330 You want to talk? 00:36:00.650 --> 00:36:01.400 How can I help? 00:36:03.470 --> 00:36:08.600 And when people do that, it's, they're crying up for help, but 00:36:08.750 --> 00:36:11.240 they don't wanna say, call me. 00:36:11.240 --> 00:36:11.900 I need help. 00:36:11.960 --> 00:36:15.680 They just wanna put it out there and, you know, so I think I've, 00:36:16.340 --> 00:36:18.800 I've honed my skills of empathy. 00:36:20.720 --> 00:36:24.830 I've learned how to recognize when people are hurting, no matter 00:36:25.130 --> 00:36:26.625 how much they try to hide it. 00:36:29.225 --> 00:36:36.035 And I take the time to be present at risk of losing their friendship. 00:36:38.105 --> 00:36:45.515 You know, sometimes you just gotta follow your heart and interject in someone's 00:36:45.515 --> 00:36:48.665 life and just say, Hey, what's going on? 00:36:48.665 --> 00:36:50.315 It sounds like you're really miserable. 00:36:50.315 --> 00:36:53.255 You're, you're hurting, you're, you're lashing out. 00:36:53.255 --> 00:36:56.165 You're, you're not the person I know. 00:36:57.395 --> 00:37:01.205 And some people are defensive and not, they're not ready to share that and they 00:37:01.295 --> 00:37:01.595 Yeah. 00:37:01.835 --> 00:37:06.755 Block you because they don't want to be constantly reminded and it's okay with me. 00:37:07.445 --> 00:37:07.805 Yeah. 00:37:07.865 --> 00:37:11.555 You know, because of the number of people that I have had honest 00:37:11.555 --> 00:37:19.145 conversations with and come out better for having that conversation. 00:37:20.345 --> 00:37:25.885 And that's why coaching appeals to me so much is that I, I reversed 00:37:25.885 --> 00:37:31.195 engineered how I overcame my adversity, and I've broken it down in 00:37:31.195 --> 00:37:33.145 Rupert Isaacson: basically 12 steps. 00:37:33.535 --> 00:37:34.765 Tell us those 12 steps. 00:37:35.545 --> 00:37:35.965 Sorry. 00:37:36.355 --> 00:37:37.735 Tell us those 12 steps. 00:37:39.035 --> 00:37:39.515 Boy, 00:37:42.825 --> 00:37:47.925 As you know, if you followed any of my work, I'm an autism dad and we have 00:37:47.925 --> 00:37:54.485 a whole career before this podcast in helping people with neurodivergence, 00:37:55.164 --> 00:37:57.385 either who are professionals in the field. 00:37:57.464 --> 00:37:58.305 Are you a therapist? 00:37:58.725 --> 00:37:59.995 Are you a caregiver? 00:38:00.385 --> 00:38:01.395 Are you a parent? 00:38:01.830 --> 00:38:03.860 Or are you somebody with neurodivergence? 00:38:05.300 --> 00:38:10.240 When my son, Rowan, was diagnosed with autism in 2004, 00:38:10.280 --> 00:38:11.910 I really didn't know what to do. 00:38:12.110 --> 00:38:17.379 So I reached out for mentorship, and I found it through an amazing adult 00:38:17.420 --> 00:38:20.220 autistic woman who's very famous, Dr. 00:38:20.370 --> 00:38:21.260 Temple Grandin. 00:38:21.460 --> 00:38:23.100 And she told me what to do. 00:38:23.150 --> 00:38:27.390 And it's been working so amazingly for the last 20 years. 00:38:27.740 --> 00:38:32.190 That not only is my son basically independent, but we've helped 00:38:32.450 --> 00:38:36.200 countless, countless thousands of others reach the same goal. 00:38:36.540 --> 00:38:40.440 Working in schools, working at home, working in therapy settings. 00:38:41.470 --> 00:38:45.910 If you would like to learn this cutting edge, neuroscience backed 00:38:46.129 --> 00:38:48.169 approach, it's called Movement Method. 00:38:48.829 --> 00:38:52.187 You can learn it online, you can learn it very, very simply. 00:38:52.187 --> 00:38:54.449 It's almost laughably simple. 00:38:55.390 --> 00:38:58.090 The important thing is to begin. 00:38:59.020 --> 00:39:02.170 Let yourself be mentored as I was by Dr. 00:39:02.170 --> 00:39:05.460 Grandin and see what results can follow. 00:39:06.490 --> 00:39:09.420 Go to this website, newtrailslearning. 00:39:11.690 --> 00:39:14.195 com Sign up as a gold member. 00:39:14.635 --> 00:39:17.525 Take the online movement method course. 00:39:18.015 --> 00:39:19.385 It's in 40 countries. 00:39:19.995 --> 00:39:22.055 Let us know how it goes for you. 00:39:22.255 --> 00:39:23.024 We really want to know. 00:39:23.035 --> 00:39:27.534 We really want to help people like me, people like you, out there 00:39:27.884 --> 00:39:31.165 live their best life, to live free, ride free, see what happens. 00:39:32.155 --> 00:39:33.505 John Kippen: Emotional regulation. 00:39:34.015 --> 00:39:34.495 Okay. 00:39:34.495 --> 00:39:34.505 Okay. 00:39:35.365 --> 00:39:36.265 Talking it out. 00:39:36.595 --> 00:39:38.365 Two heads are always better than one. 00:39:38.845 --> 00:39:39.115 Rupert Isaacson: Mm-hmm. 00:39:39.895 --> 00:39:44.035 John Kippen: Focus on what you can control and ignore the things 00:39:44.035 --> 00:39:45.235 that are out of your control. 00:39:47.305 --> 00:39:51.265 Have self-compassion, but also compassion for others. 00:39:52.465 --> 00:39:53.845 Physical self-care. 00:39:54.895 --> 00:39:55.225 Mm-hmm. 00:39:55.770 --> 00:39:57.625 Practice, practice mindfulness. 00:39:57.805 --> 00:39:58.075 Mm-hmm. 00:39:58.885 --> 00:40:00.625 Developing a growth mindset. 00:40:02.275 --> 00:40:04.135 Practice my tripod method. 00:40:04.915 --> 00:40:06.445 I can tell you what that is. 00:40:06.655 --> 00:40:06.835 Yeah, I'd 00:40:06.835 --> 00:40:07.675 Rupert Isaacson: like to know what that is. 00:40:07.675 --> 00:40:07.915 Yeah. 00:40:08.965 --> 00:40:10.315 John Kippen: Be your authentic self. 00:40:11.635 --> 00:40:16.885 Communicate things you're passionate about, live your life, taking risks 00:40:17.365 --> 00:40:21.925 and stepping into the exciting world of the unknown instead 00:40:21.925 --> 00:40:24.445 of saying in your comfort zone. 00:40:24.445 --> 00:40:29.335 You know, I, a lot of people say, you know, just step out your comfort zone. 00:40:30.265 --> 00:40:31.855 I say tto outta your comfort zone. 00:40:32.425 --> 00:40:32.905 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah. 00:40:34.615 --> 00:40:37.495 John Kippen: You only need to move an inch outta your comfort zone to have 00:40:39.505 --> 00:40:41.605 an aha moment, a revelation. 00:40:42.475 --> 00:40:45.145 When I was in college, going back to the tripod that when I was in 00:40:45.145 --> 00:40:50.345 college, I was in charge of props for a show or children's theater touring 00:40:50.345 --> 00:40:55.775 show, and it was a period show, and I had to create a tripod that would 00:40:55.775 --> 00:40:58.415 hold a potter suit over a fire. 00:41:00.290 --> 00:41:04.040 And I had all the raw materials and I was sitting in the scene shop with 00:41:04.040 --> 00:41:10.550 all the raw materials laying out on the work table, and I was just stuck. 00:41:10.550 --> 00:41:12.260 I didn't really know how to move forward. 00:41:13.430 --> 00:41:18.260 And my instructor, his name was Jerry Abbott, and he was from Paducah, Kentucky. 00:41:18.290 --> 00:41:22.760 And he was a sill Billy with suspenders and a cigar hanging out of his mouth. 00:41:24.530 --> 00:41:27.560 And he looked at me and he said, John, I didn't take you a raise. 00:41:28.340 --> 00:41:30.020 What the hell are you doing? 00:41:31.280 --> 00:41:34.550 I said, Jerry, you know, I'm having trouble getting started. 00:41:36.145 --> 00:41:42.710 And he kind of pushed me aside and he said, pick up these four sticks. 00:41:43.220 --> 00:41:43.700 Rupert Isaacson: Okay, 00:41:43.910 --> 00:41:46.400 John Kippen: take this rope, tie it around the top. 00:41:47.300 --> 00:41:47.690 Okay. 00:41:48.890 --> 00:41:52.730 Tie another piece of rope and splay the the legs out and tie it around 00:41:52.730 --> 00:41:55.490 the bottom of the, the sticks. 00:41:55.760 --> 00:41:56.180 Okay? 00:41:56.480 --> 00:41:58.160 Hang the hook from the top. 00:41:59.105 --> 00:42:02.165 You built a tripod, get out of your freaking head. 00:42:05.945 --> 00:42:11.255 And in that moment, I felt a sense of accomplishment because what I 00:42:11.255 --> 00:42:13.835 was really fearing was failing. 00:42:14.645 --> 00:42:14.855 Mm-hmm. 00:42:17.135 --> 00:42:22.685 But with his help, I built this tripod and I had to, you know, make 00:42:22.685 --> 00:42:24.395 sure it was stable and so forth. 00:42:24.395 --> 00:42:24.665 But 00:42:27.515 --> 00:42:33.815 every time I run across a challenges and I feel myself going to that place 00:42:33.815 --> 00:42:39.905 of fear and, and apprehension of taking action because it's too big of a task 00:42:39.905 --> 00:42:47.195 or whatever, I say the word tripod to myself many times, and what that does 00:42:47.195 --> 00:42:53.885 is it deals, it releases all of those feelings of accomplishment I felt. 00:42:54.935 --> 00:42:58.595 When I had actually built that damn tripod and saw it on stage, 00:43:00.845 --> 00:43:02.315 and it's like magic. 00:43:02.375 --> 00:43:08.015 You know, all of a sudden you get outta your head and you just start 00:43:08.015 --> 00:43:11.045 experimenting and if something doesn't work, you try something else. 00:43:11.045 --> 00:43:12.875 And if that doesn't work, you try something else. 00:43:12.875 --> 00:43:16.805 And, and Aven, excuse me. 00:43:16.805 --> 00:43:18.305 Eventually you figure it out. 00:43:19.205 --> 00:43:19.565 Yeah. 00:43:20.045 --> 00:43:21.815 But if you don't take that first step, 00:43:24.515 --> 00:43:25.835 you can't get to the end. 00:43:29.615 --> 00:43:30.860 Rupert Isaacson: Talk to me about magic. 00:43:32.010 --> 00:43:34.950 What's your signature 00:43:37.410 --> 00:43:38.970 trick if you have one? 00:43:39.510 --> 00:43:40.740 And why is it that one? 00:43:42.210 --> 00:43:42.930 I have a couple. 00:43:44.010 --> 00:43:50.290 John Kippen: I would take a regular deck of 52 cards and I would get a 00:43:50.290 --> 00:43:54.970 line of people in a hallway and I would hand the worst verse in the 00:43:54.970 --> 00:44:00.590 deck and ask them to remove a card and then pass the deck down the line. 00:44:01.580 --> 00:44:08.420 So each 10, 15 people, whatever, had picked up a random card and I would be not 00:44:08.420 --> 00:44:10.880 even be in vicinity, so I couldn't see it. 00:44:10.880 --> 00:44:14.870 And I would then ask them to take the card and put it between their hands like this, 00:44:14.870 --> 00:44:19.280 like they were praying so that I couldn't see the back or the front of the card 00:44:19.280 --> 00:44:21.260 in case they thought they were marked. 00:44:22.940 --> 00:44:27.440 And then I would walk down the line and immediately be able to name their card. 00:44:29.120 --> 00:44:32.060 And I would do that 10, 11, 12 times in a row. 00:44:33.920 --> 00:44:39.580 And, I would've other musicians look at me and go, what the hell? 00:44:41.080 --> 00:44:42.640 How are you doing that? 00:44:44.530 --> 00:44:47.830 And that kind of became one of my signature tricks. 00:44:48.880 --> 00:44:51.190 And over time people started to figure it out. 00:44:52.270 --> 00:44:57.940 But for many years people would request that trick because they were 00:44:57.940 --> 00:45:02.980 so befuddled by how I could possibly tell them the card they picked 00:45:03.040 --> 00:45:04.870 without even being in the same room. 00:45:08.470 --> 00:45:10.600 Rupert Isaacson: I presume you can't tell us how you did that. 00:45:10.995 --> 00:45:12.040 I, I, I can't. 00:45:12.040 --> 00:45:13.150 I'm swore into secrecy. 00:45:13.210 --> 00:45:13.870 Indeed. 00:45:14.440 --> 00:45:17.530 Were you taught that trick or did you come up with that by yourself? 00:45:20.290 --> 00:45:22.390 John Kippen: It was something that I discovered 00:45:24.550 --> 00:45:27.550 and then I came out with my own presentation, you know? 00:45:27.880 --> 00:45:27.940 Okay. 00:45:28.210 --> 00:45:31.390 It's all about, it's magic is all about the presentation. 00:45:33.820 --> 00:45:39.590 And so, going along with my story of having superpowers 00:45:42.170 --> 00:45:45.200 and awarenesses 00:45:47.300 --> 00:45:52.040 played into the believability of that trick, and, and you know, 00:45:52.040 --> 00:45:53.060 there are a lot of magicians. 00:45:53.060 --> 00:45:57.570 They say, you know, you shouldn't be doing mentalism and, and telling 00:45:57.570 --> 00:46:04.200 people you can read their minds because reading minds is not possible. 00:46:05.910 --> 00:46:08.460 But you can certainly read their body language. 00:46:09.645 --> 00:46:16.745 And you get people wanting to believe that you can read their mind, and that's really 00:46:16.745 --> 00:46:18.455 what's important in the presentation. 00:46:20.145 --> 00:46:25.005 The other thing is, you know, I was, I was sitting at the magic asshole 00:46:25.005 --> 00:46:30.645 and at one of the bars I was having dinner and this couple came in and they 00:46:30.645 --> 00:46:34.845 went to the host and the, the, I was 10 feet, 15 feet from the front door. 00:46:36.135 --> 00:46:41.805 And they asked the host if they, well, we're looking for this guy we saw last 00:46:41.805 --> 00:46:43.905 time, and God, we can't remember his name. 00:46:45.135 --> 00:46:48.405 Oh man, yeah, you, you, you gotta know him. 00:46:48.405 --> 00:46:51.105 He's the big guy with a paralyzed face. 00:46:53.055 --> 00:46:57.135 And I heard that and I didn't want to be described as the big 00:46:57.135 --> 00:46:58.695 guy with the paralyzed face. 00:47:00.315 --> 00:47:01.995 So I went online on my phone. 00:47:02.820 --> 00:47:06.300 I found a company that made these pocket squares. 00:47:06.300 --> 00:47:08.730 And the magic castle, you had to wear a coat and tie. 00:47:08.730 --> 00:47:13.980 So I found these pocket squares that would light up, and I loved the color 00:47:13.980 --> 00:47:19.730 blue, so I bought a blue one, and I started wearing that around the castle. 00:47:19.730 --> 00:47:23.570 And so when people were looking for me, they go, oh, we're 00:47:23.570 --> 00:47:26.900 looking for the guy with the blue pocket square that lights up. 00:47:28.340 --> 00:47:33.080 And it was just a way of changing the, the narrative from a negative to a positive. 00:47:35.060 --> 00:47:37.910 And managers would get on their walkie talkies and say, 00:47:38.090 --> 00:47:39.530 oh, has anyone seen John Kipp? 00:47:39.530 --> 00:47:41.180 There's someone looking for him down here? 00:47:43.190 --> 00:47:46.910 And then I got the idea of I reached out to the company who made these, 00:47:47.930 --> 00:47:52.190 and I said, can you, can you make one for me that can change colors? 00:47:53.930 --> 00:47:56.120 And he said, yeah, I think so. 00:47:57.770 --> 00:47:58.100 So. 00:47:58.910 --> 00:48:04.730 Three prototypes and $800 later I had a pocket square that 00:48:04.730 --> 00:48:06.020 I could change the colors. 00:48:08.120 --> 00:48:09.230 But I gave him a name. 00:48:09.950 --> 00:48:11.000 His name was Henry. 00:48:12.020 --> 00:48:13.100 Well, Hank was short. 00:48:14.690 --> 00:48:21.680 Hank a Kerchief was his full name, but he goes by Henry and he became my assistant. 00:48:22.970 --> 00:48:26.030 And there's illusion where I would have a little plastic box 00:48:26.030 --> 00:48:30.950 with a cube in each cube side of the cube, had a different color. 00:48:30.950 --> 00:48:35.895 And I would hand this the box in the, excuse me. 00:48:36.635 --> 00:48:36.985 Bless. 00:48:36.985 --> 00:48:40.070 See, I would hand the box in the cube to someone and I would ask them to 00:48:40.130 --> 00:48:43.940 choose a color and put a place up and then put the cover on the box. 00:48:45.500 --> 00:48:49.400 And I would ask him to visualize the, the color, and then I would reveal it. 00:48:51.650 --> 00:48:55.670 And then all of a sudden, Henry would start flashing and I'd look at him. 00:48:56.705 --> 00:48:58.175 And I apologized to the room. 00:48:58.175 --> 00:49:01.805 I said, guys, I'm sorry, I forgot to introduce you to my assistant. 00:49:03.065 --> 00:49:04.475 And they'd look around like, who, who? 00:49:04.475 --> 00:49:05.555 Who's John's assistant? 00:49:06.215 --> 00:49:07.115 He said, oh, no, Henry. 00:49:08.675 --> 00:49:11.885 Well, Hank a ship is his full name, but I call him Henry. 00:49:12.935 --> 00:49:14.795 And he's been practicing that trick. 00:49:14.795 --> 00:49:17.315 And he, he'd like to do it for you if you don't mind. 00:49:18.095 --> 00:49:22.865 So I'd have someone grab the box and cover it and, and I said, okay, 00:49:22.865 --> 00:49:24.275 Henry, it's your time to shine. 00:49:25.805 --> 00:49:27.995 And he'd start glowing the color they were thinking. 00:49:32.405 --> 00:49:34.055 And it was just amazing. 00:49:34.055 --> 00:49:36.575 You know, people who knew me would walk through the castle 00:49:36.575 --> 00:49:38.585 and they wouldn't say hi to me. 00:49:39.125 --> 00:49:43.205 But they certainly give a high five or a greeting to Henry. 00:49:46.565 --> 00:49:49.295 Rupert Isaacson: How would you know the color? 00:49:51.065 --> 00:49:51.965 I'm sorry, say it again. 00:49:52.145 --> 00:49:53.315 How would you know the color? 00:49:53.345 --> 00:49:56.165 I have to ask, even if you can't tell me the answer, how would you 00:49:56.165 --> 00:49:58.505 know the color to make Henry go? 00:49:59.795 --> 00:49:59.945 I 00:49:59.945 --> 00:50:00.635 can't tell you that. 00:50:00.815 --> 00:50:01.235 Yeah. 00:50:02.825 --> 00:50:04.025 But it was always accurate. 00:50:05.430 --> 00:50:05.720 Yeah. 00:50:09.905 --> 00:50:11.015 I don't know how people do this. 00:50:11.975 --> 00:50:19.055 I can't imagine having the type of mind that can work these things out and then 00:50:19.055 --> 00:50:22.985 reproduce them, but I'm, there's a secret 00:50:22.985 --> 00:50:23.315 John Kippen: to it. 00:50:23.585 --> 00:50:23.855 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah. 00:50:23.855 --> 00:50:24.005 And the 00:50:24.005 --> 00:50:27.875 John Kippen: secret is not hard, but the skill of a magician is to 00:50:27.875 --> 00:50:30.965 make the skill look impossible. 00:50:31.295 --> 00:50:31.595 Rupert Isaacson: Mm-hmm. 00:50:32.915 --> 00:50:37.775 John Kippen: You know, I, I talk about my coaching method and my coaching method. 00:50:37.775 --> 00:50:42.455 I put a name to it and it's called the I'm Possible Method. 00:50:42.935 --> 00:50:43.505 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 00:50:44.810 --> 00:50:47.210 John Kippen: Because if you take the word impossible and you break 00:50:47.210 --> 00:50:50.330 it down, it's really impossible. 00:50:50.570 --> 00:50:51.350 Rupert Isaacson: Absolutely. 00:50:51.950 --> 00:50:52.190 It's great. 00:50:52.190 --> 00:50:52.430 And so 00:50:52.430 --> 00:50:55.310 John Kippen: that's my methodology, my coaching methodology. 00:50:55.310 --> 00:51:00.560 And we, we talk about illusion, we talk about dreaming a lot. 00:51:01.160 --> 00:51:01.580 Hmm. 00:51:01.670 --> 00:51:05.690 You know, as a, as a young boy, my parents would have an adult friend come 00:51:05.690 --> 00:51:10.700 over and the first thing they would say to me is, nice to meet you, John. 00:51:11.120 --> 00:51:12.980 Hey, what do you want to be when you grow up? 00:51:14.825 --> 00:51:17.330 I would say, I wanna be a fireman. 00:51:19.250 --> 00:51:21.740 No, I want to be a veterinarian. 00:51:22.640 --> 00:51:23.720 No, wait, wait, wait. 00:51:23.930 --> 00:51:25.490 I wanna be a rock star. 00:51:26.990 --> 00:51:30.650 And then I would go into my room and grab two rulers and start banging 00:51:30.650 --> 00:51:34.580 on stuff like I'm playing the drums and get out my gar air guitar and 00:51:34.580 --> 00:51:36.800 start singing really bad acapella. 00:51:37.340 --> 00:51:37.520 Mm-hmm. 00:51:38.510 --> 00:51:41.750 And I'm in this land of make-believe where everything is possible. 00:51:42.245 --> 00:51:42.605 Mm. 00:51:42.875 --> 00:51:46.325 And I would stay in that land of makelele me for hours, or at least 00:51:46.325 --> 00:51:47.765 until mom called me for dinner. 00:51:48.695 --> 00:51:49.055 Yeah. 00:51:50.015 --> 00:51:50.435 You know? 00:51:50.435 --> 00:51:52.655 And then I grew up and 00:51:56.285 --> 00:51:57.305 I stopped dreaming. 00:51:58.805 --> 00:51:59.165 Mm. 00:51:59.765 --> 00:52:04.985 You know, when I, I help my clients to figure out what they want to do with 00:52:04.985 --> 00:52:06.665 their lives, no matter how old they are. 00:52:08.405 --> 00:52:12.695 And I discover a lot of times that the dreams that they're fulfilling 00:52:13.595 --> 00:52:15.035 weren't theirs to begin with. 00:52:16.475 --> 00:52:20.345 It was their parents' dream, their aunt's dream, their wife's 00:52:20.345 --> 00:52:21.880 dream, but not their dream. 00:52:23.195 --> 00:52:28.085 And they wonder why they get to be 60 years old and getting ready for retirement 00:52:28.115 --> 00:52:34.505 to live back of their life and say, God, I accomplished everything I I set out to do. 00:52:34.505 --> 00:52:36.515 Why am I feeling so unfulfilled? 00:52:38.255 --> 00:52:39.305 And the answer is simple. 00:52:40.340 --> 00:52:42.230 'cause they were living someone else's dream. 00:52:43.730 --> 00:52:44.420 Rupert Isaacson: How do you find them? 00:52:44.420 --> 00:52:45.260 Find their own dream. 00:52:48.300 --> 00:52:50.160 John Kippen: We do a lot of visualization. 00:52:51.690 --> 00:52:58.890 I give them permission to do the impossible, remove all 00:52:58.890 --> 00:53:03.270 restrictions, financial, religious, 00:53:06.090 --> 00:53:12.510 whatever, whatever their restrictions, and just prescribe to me what they 00:53:12.510 --> 00:53:14.730 truly want to accomplish in their life. 00:53:16.890 --> 00:53:22.020 And a lot of people are saying, well, I don't really, you know, 00:53:22.020 --> 00:53:25.020 you, you get to the core of that. 00:53:25.020 --> 00:53:27.930 Some people take go right there because they know what they are. 00:53:27.930 --> 00:53:31.440 Sometimes people take a long time to get there. 00:53:33.810 --> 00:53:36.780 But then, you know, we'll just have a conversation about, okay, what, 00:53:37.230 --> 00:53:42.150 what steps do you need to take to achieve that dream that is yours? 00:53:43.620 --> 00:53:45.180 And we brainstorm together. 00:53:46.830 --> 00:53:52.800 And I offer suggestions because I am, again, a, a creative problem solver. 00:53:53.100 --> 00:53:53.550 Hmm. 00:53:54.060 --> 00:54:02.510 And you know, once you find that passion, that dream of yours, it's never too late. 00:54:04.250 --> 00:54:05.840 It's never impossible. 00:54:08.840 --> 00:54:12.440 And things are impossible until you realize they are truly possible. 00:54:14.720 --> 00:54:17.510 And that is a mindset that you need to have. 00:54:19.340 --> 00:54:24.500 You know, when, when Alex Beck came out with his cancer diagnosis. 00:54:27.590 --> 00:54:32.850 Hopefully your, your listeners know who he is, but he was a Canadian born game 00:54:32.850 --> 00:54:37.620 show host for Jeopardy, which was a very popular game show in the United States, 00:54:39.960 --> 00:54:43.230 and he was the host of that show for 30 or 40 years. 00:54:44.580 --> 00:54:49.830 And he came, he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and instead of 00:54:50.070 --> 00:54:55.380 hiding it and disappearing, he went on national television and shared 00:54:55.380 --> 00:54:59.460 with his fans that what he was going through and asked for the love and 00:54:59.460 --> 00:55:04.320 support and positive thi thoughts where him while he went through that. 00:55:06.120 --> 00:55:11.400 And I sat there listening to that one night and I got goosebumps, and I was 00:55:11.400 --> 00:55:19.410 so touched by his courage to share that with millions of people and his 00:55:19.410 --> 00:55:22.800 honesty and his ability to ask for help. 00:55:25.080 --> 00:55:31.140 I reached out and I found his daughter, her name's Nikki, and I got 00:55:31.140 --> 00:55:34.230 her phone number and I said, Nikki, I need to perform with your dad. 00:55:35.790 --> 00:55:37.230 She said, I don't understand. 00:55:37.230 --> 00:55:42.480 I said, you know, I've, I've helped people going through physical crisis, going 00:55:42.480 --> 00:55:47.100 through cancer, going through whatever, and I've helped take their mind off of 00:55:47.100 --> 00:55:50.970 what they're doing, going through at least just for a half hour to an hour. 00:55:53.040 --> 00:56:01.860 And I heard your dad's ask, and I wonder, I wanna do it for him, so 00:56:01.860 --> 00:56:04.350 please, can we make this happen? 00:56:06.060 --> 00:56:09.540 And I invited them to meet my guest at the castle, and they don't, 00:56:10.890 --> 00:56:14.730 excuse me, they didn't wanna do that, but they said they were having 00:56:14.730 --> 00:56:16.470 a 70 foot birthday party for him 00:56:18.900 --> 00:56:20.880 and asked if I would be the entertainment. 00:56:22.200 --> 00:56:23.670 He said, absolutely. 00:56:24.840 --> 00:56:29.610 And I designed a brand new show all around Alex and his 00:56:29.610 --> 00:56:31.740 life, work and Jeopardy themes. 00:56:31.800 --> 00:56:34.740 And, and if you go to john kipp.com, 00:56:34.740 --> 00:56:38.640 there are magic videos of me performing for Alex Beck. 00:56:40.260 --> 00:56:42.450 And he was such a smart guy. 00:56:43.560 --> 00:56:48.120 But after the show, he and I went into another room and I said, Alex, I just 00:56:48.120 --> 00:56:49.770 wanted you to know that I sought you out. 00:56:50.220 --> 00:56:54.480 I heard you when you came out with your diagnosis, and I 00:56:54.480 --> 00:56:55.800 wanted to bring you some comfort. 00:56:55.800 --> 00:56:57.330 I wanted to bring you some joy. 00:56:57.780 --> 00:57:00.330 I wanted you to bring you a little bit of escape, 00:57:02.760 --> 00:57:04.830 and I wanted to thank you for your life's work. 00:57:06.270 --> 00:57:07.080 And he broke down. 00:57:07.080 --> 00:57:10.530 He said, John, no one ever thanks me for my life's work. 00:57:11.760 --> 00:57:13.050 They take it for granted. 00:57:14.700 --> 00:57:17.910 And I said, I presumes that would probably be the case, but. 00:57:18.930 --> 00:57:23.700 Let me be the first person to say that you are cherished by your fans. 00:57:25.920 --> 00:57:26.250 You know? 00:57:26.250 --> 00:57:32.370 And just being that generous person and just going out of your way 00:57:32.370 --> 00:57:36.780 to help someone who is in need. 00:57:36.995 --> 00:57:40.950 You feel amazing afterwards. 00:57:41.460 --> 00:57:42.030 Yeah, you do. 00:57:42.660 --> 00:57:46.140 And it becomes a habit. 00:57:49.440 --> 00:57:50.280 You touch people's 00:57:50.280 --> 00:57:50.880 Rupert Isaacson: lives 00:57:54.210 --> 00:57:58.860 When you are coaching people now, do you always bring magic into it somehow? 00:58:01.170 --> 00:58:01.410 John Kippen: Not 00:58:01.410 --> 00:58:06.060 always, but I introduce myself and they know I'm a magician. 00:58:08.220 --> 00:58:13.310 So, I talk about the principle of possibility and impossibility, 00:58:13.310 --> 00:58:15.560 and I use magic as the metaphor. 00:58:16.340 --> 00:58:18.290 Everything is impossible until you do it, 00:58:20.150 --> 00:58:21.590 Rupert Isaacson: and then you realize it's 00:58:21.590 --> 00:58:22.160 John Kippen: possible. 00:58:22.370 --> 00:58:22.670 Rupert Isaacson: Right. 00:58:22.670 --> 00:58:25.490 I could, I could imagine, say for example, if I came to you as a client 00:58:27.500 --> 00:58:27.590 mm-hmm. 00:58:27.830 --> 00:58:28.550 And you 00:58:31.190 --> 00:58:38.720 started each session with, or you included somehow in each session a magic trick 00:58:41.510 --> 00:58:44.090 as a metaphor really of what's possible. 00:58:45.740 --> 00:58:49.130 What you do is, well, there's that, but then you'd also draw 00:58:49.130 --> 00:58:51.170 my attention of course, to 00:58:52.580 --> 00:58:56.480 that veil between the possible and the impossible, and how do 00:58:56.480 --> 00:58:58.100 you make the impossible possible? 00:58:59.060 --> 00:59:01.340 And then you'd also, as you say, distract me. 00:59:02.240 --> 00:59:04.970 And one of the things about the distracted mind, this is an 00:59:04.970 --> 00:59:08.540 interesting thing in neuroscience when you daydream or when you. 00:59:10.070 --> 00:59:11.600 Take a break in whatever form. 00:59:11.600 --> 00:59:14.180 And that's why entertainment is so powerful. 00:59:14.870 --> 00:59:16.310 Storytelling is so powerful. 00:59:16.610 --> 00:59:22.700 Your brain myelinates, myelination being my myelin being the fatty tissue 00:59:22.730 --> 00:59:26.930 that grows around new neuron pathways. 00:59:26.930 --> 00:59:33.290 When neuron new neurons fire and wire together, those connections are quite 00:59:33.500 --> 00:59:39.020 fragile and it needs an insulating material like the, you know, black plastic 00:59:39.020 --> 00:59:40.490 around our phone cable kind of thing. 00:59:41.120 --> 00:59:43.910 And the brain produces this myelin. 00:59:44.390 --> 00:59:49.100 So the process called myelination when we take a break. 00:59:49.100 --> 00:59:56.300 So it happens when we daydream, it happens when we nap, it happens when we let a 00:59:56.300 --> 00:59:59.510 story take us and we rest our brain. 01:00:00.050 --> 01:00:05.150 So I can actually see the magic being a really powerful. 01:00:06.500 --> 01:00:11.060 Almost again, shamanic tool in healing to allow someone to get 01:00:11.060 --> 01:00:13.100 to that point of my myelination. 01:00:14.600 --> 01:00:16.640 And then after that comes the aha moment. 01:00:17.180 --> 01:00:21.170 So I think if I was your client, I'd be requesting in each session 01:00:21.170 --> 01:00:27.860 some, you know, something like that to serve all those purposes for my 01:00:28.550 --> 01:00:30.410 conscious and subconscious mind. 01:00:30.579 --> 01:00:34.379 Do you have a particular clientele that seeks you out for coaching? 01:00:34.794 --> 01:00:36.659 Is there a pattern? 01:00:37.649 --> 01:00:41.679 John Kippen: People who have lived similar lives with regards to some 01:00:41.679 --> 01:00:46.779 kind of illness that they're not feeling, not knowing who they are 01:00:46.779 --> 01:00:49.509 any longer, who lost their identity. 01:00:49.809 --> 01:00:50.199 Mm-hmm. 01:00:50.649 --> 01:00:58.569 People who were inspired by my zeal for stepping out of comfort zone and just 01:00:59.289 --> 01:01:02.079 doing stuff and not thinking about it. 01:01:02.769 --> 01:01:02.859 Mm-hmm. 01:01:02.859 --> 01:01:07.959 You know, I'm a huge Mel Robbins fan and I practice practice for a five second rule. 01:01:08.514 --> 01:01:10.164 What's the Mel Robbins five second rule. 01:01:11.394 --> 01:01:21.504 You get outta bed and you count 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and you get outta bed and you cross 01:01:21.504 --> 01:01:26.874 something off your list of to-dos, because if you stay in bed for longer than that 01:01:26.874 --> 01:01:33.744 five seconds, you're attempted to hit the snooze bar or you're attempted to go back 01:01:33.744 --> 01:01:42.084 No, just five more minutes and you don't start your day with clumping positive. 01:01:43.584 --> 01:01:45.414 And it's amazing how that works. 01:01:45.464 --> 01:01:49.449 Because once you're out of bed, you wash your face, you brush your 01:01:49.449 --> 01:01:52.689 teeth, and you just start your day. 01:01:53.499 --> 01:01:54.249 There's no excus. 01:01:54.404 --> 01:01:56.829 You, you know, you don't go back to bed, you don't go, you 01:01:56.829 --> 01:01:59.739 know, you just get crap done. 01:02:00.669 --> 01:02:01.119 Yeah. 01:02:01.359 --> 01:02:02.939 And, it's so true. 01:02:04.709 --> 01:02:09.599 You know, I, I, I was thinking about as we were talking, you know, I talk a lot about 01:02:10.109 --> 01:02:14.519 limiting beliefs and our limiting beliefs 01:02:16.679 --> 01:02:19.799 affect what's truly possible in our lives. 01:02:19.799 --> 01:02:29.759 And if you define your limiting beliefs, and I can suggest how 01:02:29.759 --> 01:02:37.229 they're not serving you, how they're acting as a crutch, as an excuse to 01:02:37.229 --> 01:02:42.539 continue a certain behavior that's not moving you forward in your lives. 01:02:44.009 --> 01:02:49.829 That's when I have those breakthroughs with my clients, and sometimes 01:02:49.829 --> 01:02:54.539 those limiting beliefs are so deep that it takes a couple sessions 01:02:55.139 --> 01:02:58.979 of me asking the questions. 01:02:59.384 --> 01:03:02.414 That gets you to understand what those limiting beliefs are. 01:03:02.444 --> 01:03:08.354 Normally I can see them right away, but it does you no good for me to say. 01:03:08.714 --> 01:03:11.054 And your limiting belief is this. 01:03:12.644 --> 01:03:16.664 They have to come to that understanding in that aha moment themselves. 01:03:18.254 --> 01:03:19.274 I'll give you an example. 01:03:19.274 --> 01:03:23.294 One of my coaching clients was someone I went to coaching certification school. 01:03:23.294 --> 01:03:31.694 I was certified by Jay Shetty, who's an amazing coach, and we had to do 40 01:03:31.694 --> 01:03:33.494 hours of coaching of other students. 01:03:33.494 --> 01:03:38.264 And this other woman and I connected and we started coaching each other 01:03:38.264 --> 01:03:43.384 and, and I started building my coaching practice and built my website and 01:03:43.654 --> 01:03:46.054 started doing advertising and so forth. 01:03:46.054 --> 01:03:51.144 And I would have a call with her every week and I would say, so, how are you 01:03:51.144 --> 01:03:53.064 coming along with building your business? 01:03:54.489 --> 01:03:59.199 She said, well, you know, I'm, I bought some more books and I'm reading more and, 01:03:59.709 --> 01:04:06.009 and I'm about to take this other course and, and I'm trying not to use her name, 01:04:06.069 --> 01:04:07.629 so I'm just gonna say her name is Ashley. 01:04:08.889 --> 01:04:13.839 And I said, Ashley, you have whatever it takes within you because 01:04:13.839 --> 01:04:17.619 you have the desire to be a coach and that's truly all you need. 01:04:19.029 --> 01:04:22.839 No, you know, I just don't know what to call it and this and that. 01:04:22.839 --> 01:04:26.769 And so we brainstormed together and we came up with a name for a coaching 01:04:26.769 --> 01:04:30.069 practice and that got her excited. 01:04:30.069 --> 01:04:33.679 But then the next time we got together, so, you haven't 01:04:33.679 --> 01:04:35.149 bought your domain name yet? 01:04:35.539 --> 01:04:36.409 What's going on? 01:04:37.189 --> 01:04:40.399 Yeah, well, the company I hired said they were gonna build my website and 01:04:40.399 --> 01:04:41.749 they were gonna take care of that. 01:04:41.749 --> 01:04:45.439 And I said, it's been three weeks now and nothing happened. 01:04:47.344 --> 01:04:51.679 Then I started to ask her about her childhood and her upbringing, and I said, 01:04:51.959 --> 01:04:53.524 I said, tell me about your childhood. 01:04:53.554 --> 01:04:56.074 She said, well, my mom died when I was young. 01:04:56.079 --> 01:04:59.044 And, and so I was with my dad and, and 01:04:59.094 --> 01:05:04.074 we had, we had a fine relationship, but at the age of 18, he came in 01:05:04.074 --> 01:05:06.354 and said, okay, actually you're 18. 01:05:06.354 --> 01:05:07.584 It's time for you to go. 01:05:09.264 --> 01:05:13.284 And I wasn't ready to go, but he, you know, he pushed me 01:05:13.284 --> 01:05:16.254 out and I had to go get a job. 01:05:17.304 --> 01:05:18.024 And I did. 01:05:19.164 --> 01:05:22.284 I said, what, what job did you get? 01:05:23.994 --> 01:05:26.394 Well, I don't, I don't really like to talk about it. 01:05:26.994 --> 01:05:28.914 I said, what was it? 01:05:31.134 --> 01:05:35.844 Well, I had bought, I had moved into this place and it was kind of expensive. 01:05:36.819 --> 01:05:39.729 And so, and then she's making excuses. 01:05:39.789 --> 01:05:42.759 I said, don't make excuses, just tell me what the job was. 01:05:43.839 --> 01:05:50.049 She said, well, I became a topless dancer at this club because 01:05:52.419 --> 01:05:53.709 it paid a lot of money 01:05:55.749 --> 01:05:57.489 and it was just a means to an end. 01:06:00.069 --> 01:06:03.309 And I said, so what happened when you went and told your dad? 01:06:04.089 --> 01:06:04.389 Sure. 01:06:04.389 --> 01:06:07.839 He asked you, what were you doing to support yourself? 01:06:09.639 --> 01:06:11.319 She said, yeah, I told my dad. 01:06:11.319 --> 01:06:13.449 And he said, yeah, that's what I thought you'd probably do. 01:06:16.119 --> 01:06:17.319 And I had the same reaction. 01:06:17.319 --> 01:06:18.069 I said, what? 01:06:19.029 --> 01:06:20.079 Say that again? 01:06:21.849 --> 01:06:24.219 And she said, look like it was no big deal. 01:06:24.219 --> 01:06:24.699 Yeah. 01:06:26.349 --> 01:06:29.799 He said, yeah, I thought that's probably what you would do. 01:06:31.534 --> 01:06:35.139 And he said, Ashley, listen to yourself. 01:06:36.354 --> 01:06:38.664 You wonder why you have no self-confidence? 01:06:39.774 --> 01:06:43.824 Because your one person in your life who was supposed to love you unconditionally 01:06:45.054 --> 01:06:50.334 expected you to go out and sell your, she wasn't prostituting herself, 01:06:50.334 --> 01:06:54.294 but make money off of being naked. 01:06:56.484 --> 01:07:04.374 You need to take stock in that and call your dad and tell him that was not okay. 01:07:05.209 --> 01:07:12.024 That that has affected every decision I've made or not made because 01:07:13.074 --> 01:07:15.204 I don't have self-confidence. 01:07:16.974 --> 01:07:20.754 And the next week she called me and she said, last night I called dad 01:07:21.714 --> 01:07:28.104 and I told him about that memory and he didn't even remember it. 01:07:28.434 --> 01:07:32.604 It's like it never happened, but in her mind. 01:07:34.119 --> 01:07:35.769 It eroded her self confidence. 01:07:35.769 --> 01:07:37.359 Mm-hmm. 01:07:38.709 --> 01:07:44.889 And from that point on, she had self confidence and she built her 01:07:44.889 --> 01:07:50.499 website and now she's coaching people and she's found her niche. 01:07:51.099 --> 01:07:51.939 Mm-hmm. 01:07:51.940 --> 01:07:56.619 And she didn't realize that that was the, the living belief 01:07:57.669 --> 01:08:02.679 that was keeping her from moving forward with her chosen career. 01:08:03.399 --> 01:08:04.239 Rupert Isaacson: It's interesting, isn't it? 01:08:04.269 --> 01:08:08.409 'cause if a father had said something like, well that's okay, I can see that's 01:08:08.409 --> 01:08:11.569 a means to an end, you know, do what you need to do, but I'm right behind you. 01:08:11.569 --> 01:08:13.189 But I know you can do anything in life. 01:08:13.549 --> 01:08:17.609 You know, build your business, use that money to get yourself 01:08:17.609 --> 01:08:18.959 some financial independence. 01:08:19.469 --> 01:08:22.739 You know, there, there would've been a very different way to come at that. 01:08:22.739 --> 01:08:22.889 Right. 01:08:22.889 --> 01:08:24.809 'cause you also wouldn't wanna shame somebody for doing that. 01:08:24.809 --> 01:08:25.619 That's right. 01:08:26.109 --> 01:08:26.689 When I was a. 01:08:27.639 --> 01:08:30.499 Young man getting started in journalism. 01:08:31.429 --> 01:08:33.319 I worked every construction site. 01:08:33.319 --> 01:08:36.919 I worked at farms, so I used my body, I did manual labor. 01:08:37.144 --> 01:08:37.564 Mm-hmm. 01:08:37.649 --> 01:08:41.539 And to my mind, to do what she did was exactly the same as what I did. 01:08:41.539 --> 01:08:47.479 Just with using your body to, you know, whether it's on a farm, whether 01:08:47.479 --> 01:08:50.029 it's upper ladder, whether it's in that top, you know, it's, it's 01:08:51.259 --> 01:08:54.269 you, it is manual labor let's say. 01:08:54.539 --> 01:08:56.299 And it's honorable actually. 01:08:56.809 --> 01:08:57.469 And brave. 01:08:58.429 --> 01:09:03.979 But if someone was to said to me, well, Rupert, you're a total failure. 01:09:03.979 --> 01:09:07.519 You'll never make it as a writer because you're working construction sites. 01:09:08.329 --> 01:09:11.599 I did have one or two people. 01:09:12.559 --> 01:09:15.919 And it was quite, quite interesting coming outta university and all my 01:09:15.919 --> 01:09:19.579 friends getting high paying jobs and I was there, you know, struggling 01:09:19.579 --> 01:09:25.699 on building sites and watching them, you know, buy their apartments in 01:09:25.699 --> 01:09:28.369 London and nice cars and things. 01:09:28.369 --> 01:09:33.979 And I won't say that I didn't, you know, go through some difficulties 01:09:33.979 --> 01:09:40.399 with that, but I always knew that that was what I needed to do. 01:09:41.059 --> 01:09:44.209 But luckily for me, my parents were 01:09:46.549 --> 01:09:49.219 super supportive because I come from a family of journalists and 01:09:49.219 --> 01:09:55.459 writers, so they never questioned that that process is worthwhile. 01:09:55.459 --> 01:09:57.829 And as long as you're out there trying to make it work well, 01:09:57.829 --> 01:09:58.969 good on you kind of thing. 01:09:59.609 --> 01:10:03.659 If I hadn't had that, yeah, yeah, it might have affected me. 01:10:04.499 --> 01:10:05.669 Much, much more. 01:10:05.909 --> 01:10:06.089 So. 01:10:06.089 --> 01:10:09.569 It's so interesting, isn't it just a casual word like that. 01:10:09.569 --> 01:10:13.049 And it's very interesting also that her report back after the chat with 01:10:13.049 --> 01:10:17.939 her dad saying, well, he didn't really actually remember shows that the power 01:10:17.939 --> 01:10:20.429 of words that one can say things. 01:10:20.459 --> 01:10:24.539 I'm sure I have said things, you know, to people that resonated and 01:10:24.539 --> 01:10:28.559 that I didn't think that much about. 01:10:28.559 --> 01:10:29.999 And people have said the same to me. 01:10:30.959 --> 01:10:32.729 Power of story, power of word. 01:10:32.759 --> 01:10:33.749 Absolutely. 01:10:34.259 --> 01:10:38.189 When you are, when you are trying to help people, when you're trying to 01:10:38.219 --> 01:10:44.249 help, when you are helping people to find their dreams, what's your process? 01:10:44.519 --> 01:10:48.389 'cause something that I encounter sometimes I, I do something not 01:10:48.389 --> 01:10:53.759 dissimilar is people have often forgotten their dreams because they push them 01:10:53.759 --> 01:10:58.619 away because there's a, a process that happens as you know, where, you 01:10:58.619 --> 01:11:00.269 could be shamed out of your dreams. 01:11:00.269 --> 01:11:04.979 You can just have your heart broken because you try to realize your dreams and 01:11:05.219 --> 01:11:08.429 life keeps, you know, doing other things. 01:11:08.429 --> 01:11:12.779 One, one of the analogies I use is I'll take like a paper cup and I say, see this? 01:11:12.779 --> 01:11:13.529 This is a dream. 01:11:14.159 --> 01:11:18.899 And I put it on the floor, and then I'll turn around and I'll present my 01:11:18.959 --> 01:11:20.819 arss and I'll say, you see this ass? 01:11:20.909 --> 01:11:23.099 This is life and this is what life does. 01:11:23.249 --> 01:11:27.329 And then I take an imaginary shit on the cup, and then I get up 01:11:27.329 --> 01:11:31.499 and I stomp it and I'll bury it. 01:11:31.589 --> 01:11:32.729 I'll often do that outside. 01:11:32.729 --> 01:11:36.719 I stomp it into the ground and they'll say That's what life seems to do. 01:11:36.899 --> 01:11:39.599 However, and of course this breaks our hearts, but how the 01:11:39.599 --> 01:11:40.769 dream hasn't gone anywhere. 01:11:41.219 --> 01:11:46.199 It's actually just been planted and fertilized, and now all it requires 01:11:46.199 --> 01:11:50.789 is moisture, blood, sweat, tears and it will come up like a planted seed. 01:11:51.449 --> 01:11:52.439 I might steal that. 01:11:52.439 --> 01:11:55.199 You, you, you gotta credit me 'cause that's my dream. 01:11:55.199 --> 01:11:56.039 Whisper of speech. 01:11:56.314 --> 01:11:56.604 Okay. 01:11:58.529 --> 01:11:59.039 Exactly. 01:11:59.969 --> 01:12:00.869 The autism guy. 01:12:01.319 --> 01:12:03.179 But the, but it's true. 01:12:03.239 --> 01:12:06.719 And so then what I say to people is, you know, because you might have forgotten 01:12:06.719 --> 01:12:11.129 what your dream is because of that process, 'cause of that pushing away. 01:12:12.029 --> 01:12:15.539 Don't worry, just ask the question to yourself. 01:12:16.199 --> 01:12:17.159 What's my dream? 01:12:18.449 --> 01:12:22.829 And you'll be sitting on the toilet having a poo. 01:12:23.159 --> 01:12:24.539 Or you'll be sitting in traffic. 01:12:24.539 --> 01:12:27.539 You'll be in one of those kind of unguarded moments and 01:12:27.539 --> 01:12:28.889 it'll go bubble bubble ping. 01:12:28.889 --> 01:12:32.549 'cause your, your subconscious will activate your conscious 01:12:32.549 --> 01:12:33.149 mind at that point. 01:12:33.149 --> 01:12:34.619 You go, oh yeah, that was it. 01:12:35.099 --> 01:12:37.769 And then almost immediately you'll push it away again. 01:12:38.729 --> 01:12:43.829 I can't have it, but this is what, where the rules change. 01:12:43.929 --> 01:12:45.849 And we talked about this before we hit record. 01:12:46.869 --> 01:12:52.659 I am a great believer that service is what activates dreams. 01:12:53.889 --> 01:12:58.329 If you put that dream into the service of the dreams of people 01:12:58.329 --> 01:13:00.099 more vulnerable than yourself. 01:13:01.359 --> 01:13:05.919 So of course I work a lot with people that work with autism more other, you 01:13:05.919 --> 01:13:08.049 know, vulnerable conditions like this. 01:13:08.619 --> 01:13:16.209 If you put those dreams into the service of their dreams, they're like shamans, 01:13:16.329 --> 01:13:19.869 your, your dreams will come true. 01:13:20.139 --> 01:13:23.199 You make this contract with the universe where the universe goes, 01:13:23.199 --> 01:13:25.989 oh, well this person is in service. 01:13:25.989 --> 01:13:28.209 We better make sure those dreams come true so that they can 01:13:28.209 --> 01:13:30.879 keep going and not burn out. 01:13:31.809 --> 01:13:36.399 So now the rules change and I've seen this happen time and time again for people. 01:13:37.059 --> 01:13:37.629 So. 01:13:38.754 --> 01:13:41.964 But that's not really a process of helping them fi find their dreams. 01:13:42.204 --> 01:13:44.364 That's more a process of suggestion. 01:13:45.414 --> 01:13:51.444 When you are coaching people and maybe they're having trouble accessing 01:13:51.444 --> 01:13:58.134 their dream, give me an example of how you coach them through that. 01:14:00.294 --> 01:14:04.994 If you made it this far into the podcast, then I'm guessing you're somebody 01:14:05.004 --> 01:14:09.984 that, like me, loves to read books about not just how people have achieved 01:14:09.994 --> 01:14:15.994 self actualization, but particularly about the relationship with nature. 01:14:16.444 --> 01:14:19.624 Spirituality, life, the universe, and everything. 01:14:20.364 --> 01:14:23.314 And I'd like to draw your attention to my books. 01:14:23.324 --> 01:14:28.004 If you would like to read the story of how we even arrived here, perhaps 01:14:28.004 --> 01:14:32.464 you'd like to check out the two New York Times bestsellers, The Horseboy 01:14:33.164 --> 01:14:38.134 and The Long Ride Home, and come on an adventure with us and see what engendered, 01:14:38.194 --> 01:14:40.344 what started Live Free Ride Free. 01:14:40.364 --> 01:14:44.144 And before we go back to the podcast, also check out The Healing 01:14:44.144 --> 01:14:46.634 Land, which tells the story of. 01:14:47.339 --> 01:14:52.729 My years spent in the Kalahari with the Sun, Bushmen, hunter gatherer people 01:14:52.729 --> 01:14:56.889 there, and all that they taught me, and mentored me in, and all that I learned. 01:14:57.139 --> 01:14:58.399 Come on that adventure with me. 01:14:58.423 --> 01:15:00.913 John Kippen: Well, they tell them the story about the five-year-old 01:15:00.913 --> 01:15:08.503 kid meeting the friend of their dad's and ask them to go back where 01:15:08.503 --> 01:15:10.963 there are no limitations and mm-hmm. 01:15:10.964 --> 01:15:12.853 And ask them what they want to do when they grow up. 01:15:13.333 --> 01:15:13.693 Mm-hmm. 01:15:15.103 --> 01:15:18.763 You know, bring them back to that time of innocence, that childhood. 01:15:19.813 --> 01:15:21.643 And there are no limitations. 01:15:21.703 --> 01:15:28.303 You know, whatever your dream can sound outlandish, it can sound stupid, it can 01:15:28.303 --> 01:15:31.633 sound honorable, it can sound whatever. 01:15:32.638 --> 01:15:40.108 But deep down, we all know what we want to do, what we're attracted to, what 01:15:40.108 --> 01:15:43.978 we're inspired by, who we're inspired by. 01:15:44.818 --> 01:15:50.098 And we watch them succeed at something that we are interested in. 01:15:51.298 --> 01:15:58.318 And that is what helps us say, if John can do it, I can do it. 01:16:00.028 --> 01:16:07.708 You know, some dreams are easier than others to attain, but life is about 01:16:07.708 --> 01:16:09.328 the journey, not the destination. 01:16:10.408 --> 01:16:12.088 And people often forget that, 01:16:13.948 --> 01:16:16.918 Rupert Isaacson: always, because it's not how we're conditioned. 01:16:17.968 --> 01:16:19.918 We're not conditioned to unconditional love, and we're 01:16:19.918 --> 01:16:21.688 not conditioned to the journey. 01:16:21.988 --> 01:16:24.268 We are absolutely conditioned to the destination. 01:16:26.043 --> 01:16:27.898 And the destination is six feet under. 01:16:28.468 --> 01:16:28.918 John Kippen: Yeah. 01:16:32.323 --> 01:16:38.293 So when people ask me the loaded question, what's the meaning of life from John Kipp? 01:16:39.823 --> 01:16:42.733 Is to fill as many moments of my life with joy. 01:16:43.453 --> 01:16:43.903 Yeah. 01:16:46.393 --> 01:16:47.263 As possible. 01:16:47.593 --> 01:16:47.923 Yeah. 01:16:49.063 --> 01:16:53.083 And joy shows up many different ways. 01:16:54.433 --> 01:16:57.913 Most of 'em have to do with interactions with other human 01:16:57.913 --> 01:17:00.763 beings or interactions with animals. 01:17:01.123 --> 01:17:01.303 Yeah. 01:17:01.363 --> 01:17:01.843 Nature. 01:17:02.563 --> 01:17:02.713 Yeah. 01:17:02.773 --> 01:17:03.313 Yeah. 01:17:04.513 --> 01:17:08.173 You know, being able to, and there's magic all around us, you know? 01:17:08.833 --> 01:17:10.813 You know, I love going cruising. 01:17:11.983 --> 01:17:17.533 'cause I'll be on a cruise ship and go and sit down outside and just watch 01:17:17.533 --> 01:17:24.253 the ocean for an hour and watch the waves and maybe there'll be a whale or 01:17:24.253 --> 01:17:27.343 a seal or a dolphin or whatever, just. 01:17:28.543 --> 01:17:29.623 Living its life, 01:17:32.563 --> 01:17:41.773 and I'll put myself just into this zen state and breathe the fresh air and 01:17:41.773 --> 01:17:47.293 let all my worries, all my troubles, all my angst, just float away. 01:17:49.333 --> 01:17:54.343 And that's when you clear your mind of all that baggage, all that crap. 01:17:55.753 --> 01:17:57.193 That's when you come to 01:17:59.233 --> 01:18:01.153 who you are and what you want to achieve. 01:18:03.733 --> 01:18:09.643 You need to make room in your brain for those ideas and those 01:18:09.643 --> 01:18:12.793 dreams to come to the surface. 01:18:15.043 --> 01:18:21.253 And so we do a lot of exercises about just blur your mind and 01:18:21.253 --> 01:18:23.083 being present, being in the moment. 01:18:23.893 --> 01:18:26.083 Feel what it's like to sit in the chair. 01:18:27.268 --> 01:18:31.288 Feel the wind or the air from the fan above you. 01:18:31.978 --> 01:18:36.058 Feel the warmth from the light, whatever it is. 01:18:36.058 --> 01:18:39.118 And just be in that moment and just be present. 01:18:40.978 --> 01:18:50.548 And then I'll lower my voice and speak very soothingly and calmly and say, okay, 01:18:51.718 --> 01:18:53.968 what thoughts are coming to your mind now? 01:18:54.988 --> 01:18:56.938 And let's explore those thoughts. 01:18:58.768 --> 01:19:01.578 And people start to understand 01:19:04.008 --> 01:19:06.438 what they want to do, what they want to be. 01:19:07.453 --> 01:19:09.918 It can be anyone who we want to be. 01:19:11.808 --> 01:19:13.608 It just takes making a choice. 01:19:14.988 --> 01:19:16.368 Happiness is a choice. 01:19:17.928 --> 01:19:20.208 Being filled with joy is a choice, 01:19:22.368 --> 01:19:22.968 period. 01:19:25.293 --> 01:19:30.243 Those who are feeling fulfilled are the ones who are able to make those choices. 01:19:34.413 --> 01:19:39.513 So I think I get a lot of feedback from my clients that when they are done with their 01:19:39.513 --> 01:19:42.063 45 minutes to an hour session with me, 01:19:44.673 --> 01:19:45.543 they can breathe again. 01:19:47.553 --> 01:19:52.893 They have a list of actionable steps that they want to take, not 01:19:52.893 --> 01:19:55.623 need to take, they want to take. 01:19:57.123 --> 01:20:00.933 'cause when you need to do something, you find every excuse 01:20:00.933 --> 01:20:03.033 in the world not to do it. 01:20:04.803 --> 01:20:09.123 When you want to take a step becomes easier. 01:20:10.503 --> 01:20:11.493 It becomes a, 01:20:14.313 --> 01:20:14.943 a mission. 01:20:16.773 --> 01:20:22.213 You know, I, I try to funny, I misspoke. 01:20:23.173 --> 01:20:27.013 Once we let a word that I remove from a vocabulary, except 01:20:27.013 --> 01:20:29.593 until just now is the word try, 01:20:31.783 --> 01:20:35.473 because there is no trying, there's doing it or not doing it. 01:20:39.193 --> 01:20:41.443 And we all fall into that trap. 01:20:41.953 --> 01:20:42.463 Rupert Isaacson: Well, right. 01:20:42.638 --> 01:20:42.918 I just did. 01:20:43.153 --> 01:20:43.243 John Kippen: I 01:20:43.243 --> 01:20:47.503 Rupert Isaacson: think the word try comes from doing it 01:20:49.723 --> 01:20:54.553 and failing and then doing it again. 01:20:55.633 --> 01:20:57.528 And we have a verb for that, which is try. 01:20:58.873 --> 01:21:06.703 But what is definitely true is if you break down, try provided, you keep doing 01:21:06.703 --> 01:21:15.673 it it, what it really is, is a series of doings where it can be ambivalent is. 01:21:17.023 --> 01:21:22.093 If your are inner resolve, if your inner faith is shaken, then it can be 01:21:22.093 --> 01:21:25.993 hard to do it with the conviction that 01:21:28.243 --> 01:21:33.253 will allow for success. 01:21:34.303 --> 01:21:38.023 However, that sometimes that is a necessary step to go through, but that 01:21:38.023 --> 01:21:40.423 necessary step can take a decade or two. 01:21:41.053 --> 01:21:41.143 Try 01:21:41.143 --> 01:21:41.293 John Kippen: is 01:21:41.563 --> 01:21:42.763 Rupert Isaacson: always, almost 01:21:42.763 --> 01:21:44.023 John Kippen: always an excuse. 01:21:46.453 --> 01:21:46.843 Yes. 01:21:47.173 --> 01:21:47.743 Oh, I tried it and 01:21:47.743 --> 01:21:49.633 Rupert Isaacson: it didn't work out, so I'm giving up. 01:21:49.873 --> 01:21:53.473 Well, provided yes, you see there's two tries. 01:21:53.473 --> 01:21:54.253 There's aren't there? 01:21:54.643 --> 01:21:59.773 There's try and I gave up and maybe that's a forever giving up. 01:21:59.773 --> 01:22:06.013 Maybe that's a temporary giving up and there's trying and trying again and trying 01:22:06.013 --> 01:22:08.953 again and trying again and trying again. 01:22:09.973 --> 01:22:12.523 And it's interesting that we have this word, this verb, 01:22:12.613 --> 01:22:14.803 trying has two meanings, right? 01:22:14.803 --> 01:22:22.363 That something you, you can try, can be an attempt, but trying can also be 01:22:22.753 --> 01:22:26.833 to suffer, to put up with, to endure. 01:22:27.163 --> 01:22:29.623 This is trying, this is a trying situation. 01:22:29.923 --> 01:22:35.533 This is trying me, you know, that's the older use of that verb, but you need 01:22:35.533 --> 01:22:40.123 a certain amount of that tempering in the fire, being on the anvil with the 01:22:40.123 --> 01:22:41.713 hammer going bang, bang, bang on you. 01:22:42.223 --> 01:22:48.923 Of course to find that strength to one has to be tried, one has to be yeah, tested. 01:22:50.033 --> 01:22:55.193 So yes, I guess it's that thing, isn't it of do I try and give 01:22:55.193 --> 01:22:59.843 up or do I try and keep trying? 01:22:59.993 --> 01:23:01.808 What was it Winston Churchill said When you're going through hell. 01:23:02.573 --> 01:23:03.233 Keep going. 01:23:04.343 --> 01:23:04.353 John Kippen: Yeah. 01:23:04.703 --> 01:23:05.063 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah. 01:23:05.283 --> 01:23:06.243 I thought that was a good one. 01:23:06.643 --> 01:23:10.783 But I, I do hear what you say that it, it's about trying with that 01:23:13.093 --> 01:23:15.703 bloody minded determination that, fuck it. 01:23:15.703 --> 01:23:16.723 I'm just gonna get there. 01:23:17.453 --> 01:23:17.463 Yeah. 01:23:17.813 --> 01:23:19.103 But it might take me a while. 01:23:19.283 --> 01:23:20.573 I mean, for example, I have a dream. 01:23:20.573 --> 01:23:23.903 I have a dream, which is to write fantasy novels, historical fantasy novels. 01:23:24.113 --> 01:23:28.163 I've been working on the same novel for 15 years. 01:23:28.943 --> 01:23:29.213 Wow. 01:23:29.693 --> 01:23:31.013 And I've done all sorts of things. 01:23:31.013 --> 01:23:32.753 And it must be a thousand pages long. 01:23:32.993 --> 01:23:33.893 No, no, no. 01:23:33.893 --> 01:23:35.783 It's, it's only one third written. 01:23:36.113 --> 01:23:38.753 It's just, it's a big deal. 01:23:38.873 --> 01:23:42.083 It's actually about, actually about half written, actually, that's half written. 01:23:42.593 --> 01:23:44.993 But it's, it's a, the story is big. 01:23:45.483 --> 01:23:50.463 It takes in real events that have to be then put through a 01:23:50.463 --> 01:23:52.443 fictional lens, which are complex. 01:23:52.863 --> 01:23:56.733 And I got involved with other things too, like autism and, 01:23:58.803 --> 01:24:02.403 or the, or the work that I do and then other young kids and so on and so on. 01:24:02.793 --> 01:24:04.563 But I never stopped doing it. 01:24:04.623 --> 01:24:05.703 And it's really interesting. 01:24:05.703 --> 01:24:09.093 I know people who roll their eyes when I talk about the novel, 'cause they, 01:24:09.093 --> 01:24:10.143 they've known me for a long time. 01:24:10.143 --> 01:24:11.583 Oh, you're still on that, are you? 01:24:12.283 --> 01:24:16.663 And, but I also know what it is to write a book in 18 months, but not this one. 01:24:17.563 --> 01:24:23.023 And I have definitely gone through all kinds of angst about it because when you 01:24:23.023 --> 01:24:25.963 write novels too, there's no guarantee. 01:24:26.413 --> 01:24:30.323 So when you write nonfiction as you may know, you can put out a proposal 01:24:30.623 --> 01:24:35.933 to a publisher and have that proposal accepted and actually be given. 01:24:36.983 --> 01:24:39.743 If it go all goes, what in advance of money? 01:24:40.583 --> 01:24:42.503 Against your royalties to write the thing. 01:24:42.503 --> 01:24:45.533 And the publisher takes the risk that maybe people will 01:24:45.533 --> 01:24:46.493 buy it, maybe they won't. 01:24:47.063 --> 01:24:48.683 But with novels it doesn't work that way. 01:24:48.683 --> 01:24:52.493 You have to write it and then there's every chance it might be rejected. 01:24:52.493 --> 01:24:54.983 And you, you can spend, you know, two decades on it. 01:24:55.253 --> 01:24:59.163 You know, JK Rowling got rejected by everybody for quite a long time. 01:24:59.373 --> 01:25:03.873 So you have to accept this and you must accept this before you begin. 01:25:05.043 --> 01:25:07.413 And at the same time, you have to ask yourself the question. 01:25:07.563 --> 01:25:09.153 Yeah, but do I want to do it anyway? 01:25:10.473 --> 01:25:13.683 And if the answer is yes, and for, for me the answer is, is yes. 01:25:14.013 --> 01:25:15.693 So it's definitely about the journey. 01:25:16.533 --> 01:25:19.173 And it's interesting too 'cause I'm a published author, but I have no 01:25:19.173 --> 01:25:21.453 idea if anyone will take this book. 01:25:22.473 --> 01:25:24.393 But it doesn't mean I shouldn't write it. 01:25:25.983 --> 01:25:28.233 And it would've taken a couple of decades of my life. 01:25:30.543 --> 01:25:31.353 But so what? 01:25:32.373 --> 01:25:32.823 It's fun. 01:25:33.363 --> 01:25:34.663 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:25:35.373 --> 01:25:36.363 You could also, 01:25:36.463 --> 01:25:40.843 John Kippen: Stop at a certain point in your writing 01:25:43.033 --> 01:25:45.943 and lead to the second novel 01:25:47.953 --> 01:25:50.263 and just get the first one out 01:25:52.813 --> 01:26:00.943 so that you don't feel this pressure that you've wasted the last 10 01:26:00.943 --> 01:26:04.003 plus years writing this novel. 01:26:04.003 --> 01:26:05.893 It's, you can always have a sequel. 01:26:07.123 --> 01:26:07.813 Rupert Isaacson: Oh, yes. 01:26:07.843 --> 01:26:10.123 No, the novel is definitely a series. 01:26:10.453 --> 01:26:13.993 I hope that the, I have a funny gut feeling that the other ones will not 01:26:13.993 --> 01:26:17.503 take anything like as long because I don't have to set up the world. 01:26:18.433 --> 01:26:21.643 John Kippen: But you always wanna leave your audience wanting more. 01:26:21.973 --> 01:26:22.753 Yeah, that's true. 01:26:22.903 --> 01:26:23.083 Yeah. 01:26:23.083 --> 01:26:23.593 You do. 01:26:25.453 --> 01:26:26.113 Yeah, you do. 01:26:26.893 --> 01:26:29.343 So, maybe you should consider 01:26:31.383 --> 01:26:39.873 finding a way to end the sure's chapter, publish that on your 01:26:39.873 --> 01:26:42.963 own through TDP or whatever. 01:26:43.383 --> 01:26:43.473 Mm-hmm. 01:26:44.283 --> 01:26:48.573 And if people are attracted to it, then go to a publisher and say, 01:26:49.143 --> 01:26:55.353 okay, I want you to help me publish part two, part three, part four. 01:26:59.823 --> 01:27:00.513 Just a thought. 01:27:00.963 --> 01:27:01.833 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah, absolutely. 01:27:02.343 --> 01:27:06.723 Some thoughts, and I know a lot of people listening and watching here will 01:27:06.723 --> 01:27:14.133 be writing and or having other projects which they could use some help with. 01:27:14.883 --> 01:27:15.603 So 01:27:16.653 --> 01:27:21.003 John Kippen: I wrote this in, I thought about it for five years. 01:27:21.183 --> 01:27:21.513 Yeah. 01:27:22.188 --> 01:27:23.448 And wrote about it in two 01:27:23.448 --> 01:27:24.168 Rupert Isaacson: and a half months. 01:27:24.258 --> 01:27:24.798 Wrote it in two. 01:27:24.798 --> 01:27:25.188 Yeah. 01:27:25.578 --> 01:27:28.218 You see, I would posit that, that that book was probably 01:27:28.218 --> 01:27:29.358 seven years in the making. 01:27:30.348 --> 01:27:31.398 I've, I've had those too. 01:27:31.398 --> 01:27:35.598 My, my last book I, I did in about 18 months, but I lived the 01:27:35.598 --> 01:27:38.898 story for a good Oh, of course. 01:27:38.928 --> 01:27:39.078 Yeah. 01:27:39.198 --> 01:27:39.468 John Kippen: Oh yeah. 01:27:39.498 --> 01:27:39.798 Yeah. 01:27:39.798 --> 01:27:40.488 It's a memoir. 01:27:40.818 --> 01:27:41.148 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah. 01:27:41.628 --> 01:27:44.868 John Kippen: You know, it was just trying to figure out editing. 01:27:45.318 --> 01:27:47.688 It was more difficult than writing 01:27:47.688 --> 01:27:47.838 Rupert Isaacson: it. 01:27:47.958 --> 01:27:49.068 Absolutely. 01:27:49.098 --> 01:27:50.868 That's what everybody doesn't realize. 01:27:51.138 --> 01:27:54.738 And if you want to write a good book, it's a, if you haven't got a good 01:27:54.738 --> 01:27:58.608 editor, if you wanna make a film, if you haven't got a good editor, w 01:27:59.598 --> 01:28:03.228 no matter how you might be able to edit your own book, but it would take 01:28:03.228 --> 01:28:07.308 about 40 years to really edit it well. 01:28:07.638 --> 01:28:11.898 Whereas a really good editor can just come in and go, b, b, b if 01:28:11.898 --> 01:28:13.668 you have, if they get your story. 01:28:13.698 --> 01:28:14.958 It is the most important thing. 01:28:14.958 --> 01:28:18.233 I think the editor, I included, go ahead. 01:28:18.233 --> 01:28:19.458 I included, I included 01:28:19.458 --> 01:28:20.688 John Kippen: QR codes in my book. 01:28:21.318 --> 01:28:21.888 Okay. 01:28:22.638 --> 01:28:26.718 Why so, and you, as you're reading it, you scan the QR code and it takes 01:28:26.718 --> 01:28:28.488 you to a secret area On my website. 01:28:28.938 --> 01:28:29.448 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 01:28:29.568 --> 01:28:34.338 John Kippen: Where it has videos of me, ex, you know, my TED Talk 01:28:35.268 --> 01:28:37.548 that now has a million plus views. 01:28:37.758 --> 01:28:38.148 Rupert Isaacson: Mm. 01:28:38.268 --> 01:28:40.938 John Kippen: To the documentary I did with Jimmy, the Curtis. 01:28:41.103 --> 01:28:41.523 Rupert Isaacson: Mm-hmm. 01:28:42.018 --> 01:28:47.748 John Kippen: To me, performing for Alex tbe to all the highlights Mm. 01:28:47.748 --> 01:28:50.568 Good and bad of my life. 01:28:51.948 --> 01:28:54.048 And I wrote it because I'm a theater guy. 01:28:54.048 --> 01:28:59.718 I wrote it not with chapters, but with acts and scenes. 01:29:00.258 --> 01:29:00.678 Rupert Isaacson: Okay. 01:29:02.148 --> 01:29:04.548 And I think you read us something from it. 01:29:04.668 --> 01:29:05.808 Read us something from your book. 01:29:08.538 --> 01:29:08.778 Oh 01:29:08.778 --> 01:29:09.378 John Kippen: boy. 01:29:13.488 --> 01:29:16.038 Act 14, Ted Talk and documentary. 01:29:16.848 --> 01:29:22.638 At this moment, I felt the confidence and drive to share my journey, realizing that 01:29:22.668 --> 01:29:25.128 magic needed to be an integral part of it. 01:29:26.088 --> 01:29:30.588 I reached out to my good friend David, an incredible magician who would, has 01:29:30.588 --> 01:29:36.048 appeared on shows like and the Marriage of God talent, and I asked for his assistance 01:29:36.048 --> 01:29:40.818 in creating a new magic act that would blend with motivational speaking. 01:29:41.658 --> 01:29:45.888 He emphasized that if I wanted to be a motivational speaker, I 01:29:45.888 --> 01:29:49.788 needed credibility and suggested I considered doing a TED Talk. 01:29:50.898 --> 01:29:54.288 I hadn't thought about that, but I was open to the idea. 01:29:56.868 --> 01:30:01.638 David kindly submitted two applications on my behalf to events at UCLA 01:30:01.668 --> 01:30:03.648 and San Diego State University. 01:30:04.428 --> 01:30:07.218 Both were seeking speakers for 10 available slots. 01:30:08.268 --> 01:30:12.498 Two weeks later, I received an email from the organizer of the San Diego 01:30:12.498 --> 01:30:14.388 event requesting more information. 01:30:15.078 --> 01:30:19.398 After several conversations, they informed me there, there were three openings, and 01:30:19.398 --> 01:30:21.618 they asked me if I would fill one of them. 01:30:23.448 --> 01:30:27.238 So, you know, it's, it's, it's but then I have sections in the 01:30:27.238 --> 01:30:30.208 book called Pearls of Wisdom. 01:30:31.828 --> 01:30:34.308 And they're just thought provoking. 01:30:36.288 --> 01:30:36.708 You know, 01:30:39.018 --> 01:30:41.298 how to develop a magic mindset. 01:30:41.808 --> 01:30:42.948 Go on, let's have it. 01:30:43.758 --> 01:30:46.428 What is a magical mindset? 01:30:46.608 --> 01:30:48.618 Why is a magical mindset important? 01:30:49.638 --> 01:30:52.638 That's two pages of the book. 01:30:53.508 --> 01:30:53.748 Just 01:30:54.288 --> 01:30:56.118 Rupert Isaacson: talking about, read those pages, read us those pages. 01:31:00.663 --> 01:31:03.753 What is a magical mindset, and why is a magical mindset important? 01:31:04.593 --> 01:31:05.253 I think this in 01:31:05.253 --> 01:31:06.213 John Kippen: our everyday line. 01:31:06.243 --> 01:31:10.223 Well, I, I always I have many, many quotes, but each pearl 01:31:10.223 --> 01:31:11.453 of wisdom starts with a quote. 01:31:11.813 --> 01:31:16.223 I think anything is possible if you have the mindset and the will and 01:31:16.223 --> 01:31:19.073 desire to do it, and put the time in. 01:31:19.463 --> 01:31:20.573 Roger Clemens. 01:31:21.383 --> 01:31:26.993 In our everyday lives, we often focus on what's real and practical, but that's 01:31:27.713 --> 01:31:29.603 if we could see the world differently. 01:31:30.083 --> 01:31:32.873 What sorry, but what if we could see the world differently? 01:31:33.593 --> 01:31:35.873 A magic mindset helps us do just that. 01:31:36.683 --> 01:31:40.943 The way of thinking allows us to see possibilities, be creative, 01:31:41.213 --> 01:31:43.703 and find joy in the little things. 01:31:44.123 --> 01:31:49.013 In this section, we'll explore what a magic mindset is, why it's important, 01:31:49.403 --> 01:31:51.443 and how to develop it in our lives. 01:31:52.373 --> 01:31:54.683 A magic mindset is about believing in the. 01:31:55.163 --> 01:31:57.323 Wonderful possibilities around us. 01:31:57.863 --> 01:31:58.853 It means that life. 01:31:58.883 --> 01:32:04.043 Looking at life with a sense of wonder and imagination, instead of 01:32:04.043 --> 01:32:09.533 seeing problems as big barriers, we can use them as exciting challenges. 01:32:09.533 --> 01:32:13.463 To overcome this mindset helps us be creative. 01:32:14.213 --> 01:32:17.213 When we think magically, we allow ourselves to dream big 01:32:17.723 --> 01:32:19.403 and come up with new ideas. 01:32:19.973 --> 01:32:20.993 Stay curious. 01:32:21.503 --> 01:32:27.533 A magic mindset encourages us to ask questions and explore the world around us. 01:32:28.193 --> 01:32:33.233 Be strong instead of giving up when things are tough, we learn 01:32:33.263 --> 01:32:35.363 to bounce back and keep going. 01:32:36.233 --> 01:32:37.343 Appreciate life. 01:32:38.063 --> 01:32:42.473 We learn to be thankful for even the small, beautiful moments in our day. 01:32:43.883 --> 01:32:45.113 Trust our feelings. 01:32:45.683 --> 01:32:51.383 We listen to our inner voice and all, and follow what feels right to us. 01:32:53.033 --> 01:32:55.253 Why is magic mind important? 01:32:55.673 --> 01:32:56.033 Excuse me. 01:32:56.033 --> 01:32:58.523 Why is the magic mindset important? 01:32:59.273 --> 01:33:03.023 Having a magical mindset can change how we experience life. 01:33:04.703 --> 01:33:06.053 Here are some benefits. 01:33:06.623 --> 01:33:07.673 Boost creativity. 01:33:08.243 --> 01:33:12.293 Thinking magically helps us come up with new and exciting ideas. 01:33:12.833 --> 01:33:16.493 This is useful in school, work, and personal projects. 01:33:17.333 --> 01:33:19.493 It makes problem solving easier. 01:33:20.093 --> 01:33:24.443 When we face challenges with curiosity, we can usually find better 01:33:24.443 --> 01:33:27.563 solutions, improve relationships. 01:33:28.043 --> 01:33:32.273 A magical mindset helps us connect with others and build stronger 01:33:32.333 --> 01:33:36.323 friendships, increase happiness. 01:33:36.953 --> 01:33:39.053 By noticing the magic in our lives. 01:33:39.323 --> 01:33:43.883 We feel more joy and satisfaction build resilience. 01:33:44.363 --> 01:33:49.073 We learn to keep trying even when things don't go our way. 01:33:49.148 --> 01:33:51.188 I'm not gonna read his whole book. 01:33:51.518 --> 01:33:53.968 You can read it when you download it, but fantastic. 01:33:54.748 --> 01:33:59.938 You know, so there are, there's even, there's even an intermission in the book. 01:34:00.118 --> 01:34:00.148 Mm. 01:34:01.018 --> 01:34:04.588 And during the intermission there's a video and it 01:34:04.588 --> 01:34:06.118 teaches you how to do a trick. 01:34:06.838 --> 01:34:07.708 That's fantastic. 01:34:08.368 --> 01:34:11.068 The trick is very simple. 01:34:11.788 --> 01:34:15.258 Used to be more applicable when you had business cards. 01:34:16.078 --> 01:34:20.158 But you can use it when you have a credit card and you pass it out to a server. 01:34:20.638 --> 01:34:22.588 What I do is I take the credit card 01:34:25.378 --> 01:34:26.308 and I make it float, 01:34:30.778 --> 01:34:35.098 and then you hand that, whatever it is, the business card, a ticket to 01:34:35.098 --> 01:34:37.568 something whatever it is to them. 01:34:38.468 --> 01:34:44.588 And now they kind of examine it and they're like, but did it float? 01:34:45.608 --> 01:34:47.348 And I just say, yeah, it floated. 01:34:48.728 --> 01:34:52.238 You know, I, I start, I came up with that idea when people use business 01:34:52.238 --> 01:34:55.718 cards, because so many people will take a business card, they'll stick it 01:34:55.743 --> 01:34:58.868 in their pocket and they get back to work and they clean up their pockets. 01:34:58.868 --> 01:35:00.038 They throw it in a dust drawer. 01:35:00.038 --> 01:35:01.208 They throw it in the trash. 01:35:01.523 --> 01:35:04.658 But I wanted people to keep my business card. 01:35:06.158 --> 01:35:09.308 So if you present your business card in a magical way, 01:35:11.378 --> 01:35:18.128 they'll feel, people feel less inclined to throw it away. 01:35:18.548 --> 01:35:20.348 Hmm, that's true. 01:35:20.888 --> 01:35:21.728 Put it in their wallet. 01:35:23.468 --> 01:35:28.028 They'll keep it in a, keep it on their desk instead of it 01:35:28.028 --> 01:35:29.438 hidden in the back of a drawer. 01:35:30.488 --> 01:35:32.198 'cause they saw it do something magical. 01:35:33.998 --> 01:35:41.348 And it helps you separate yourself from all your competitors in business. 01:35:43.118 --> 01:35:48.008 It's a simple trick to do and I teach people in a video of how to do it, 01:35:48.998 --> 01:35:52.418 but you gotta download the book and get to the intermission to be able 01:35:52.418 --> 01:35:56.918 to find that link to the video of teaching me how to make your business 01:35:56.918 --> 01:35:58.598 card or credit card, whatever float. 01:36:00.878 --> 01:36:01.148 Rupert Isaacson: Fantastic. 01:36:03.693 --> 01:36:04.053 John Kippen: I love 01:36:04.178 --> 01:36:05.348 Rupert Isaacson: watching your reactions. 01:36:06.308 --> 01:36:07.058 Yes. 01:36:07.928 --> 01:36:08.228 Yes. 01:36:08.258 --> 01:36:11.438 'cause what you do is you bring, it becomes a taliman and your car 01:36:11.438 --> 01:36:15.658 becomes a talisman and by extension. 01:36:15.688 --> 01:36:16.468 So do you. 01:36:19.588 --> 01:36:20.398 Brilliant, John. 01:36:20.488 --> 01:36:23.218 Well, look, we're approaching the, the two hour mark. 01:36:24.298 --> 01:36:26.728 Any final, any last words? 01:36:27.518 --> 01:36:31.298 It's been, it's been a great conversation and obviously we, 01:36:31.568 --> 01:36:32.888 you should give us your website. 01:36:32.888 --> 01:36:36.308 You should give us what links people, how people can get to 01:36:36.308 --> 01:36:38.288 you for coaching, et cetera. 01:36:39.218 --> 01:36:43.268 But before we go there, any final words? 01:36:45.758 --> 01:36:49.508 John Kippen: Well, I want to say that this is an amazing conversation for me as well. 01:36:50.678 --> 01:36:55.928 I wanted to remind people that wherever they are in their lives, they're 01:36:55.928 --> 01:37:00.698 worthy of being loved, they're worthy of being respected, no matter what 01:37:00.698 --> 01:37:03.338 mistakes they've made in their lives. 01:37:04.478 --> 01:37:08.318 Those mistakes do not define them as human beings. 01:37:08.438 --> 01:37:08.768 Mm-hmm. 01:37:09.848 --> 01:37:13.568 That being different is truly their superpower. 01:37:14.528 --> 01:37:22.418 And is those differences that make us, us stand out in a crowd as opposed to 01:37:22.838 --> 01:37:27.018 hide and feed your heart with your art. 01:37:28.158 --> 01:37:28.968 Oh, I love that. 01:37:31.068 --> 01:37:32.118 Rupert Isaacson: Feed your heart with your art. 01:37:32.118 --> 01:37:35.178 That's a, that's a great ending note. 01:37:36.378 --> 01:37:36.918 All right. 01:37:36.948 --> 01:37:38.538 The plugs, how do people find you? 01:37:39.418 --> 01:37:42.148 John Kippen: My main website is john kippen.com. 01:37:42.208 --> 01:37:47.068 KIT as in Paul, T as in Paul, EN as in nancy.com. 01:37:47.068 --> 01:37:49.738 It's John with an h john kipp.com. 01:37:50.458 --> 01:37:53.128 And then you can go to kipp coaching.com 01:37:53.223 --> 01:37:59.988 to, to learn how to reach out to me and set up a no obligation zoom meeting. 01:38:00.408 --> 01:38:00.618 Mm. 01:38:00.678 --> 01:38:04.728 To talk about what you wanna accomplish and where you feel stuck 01:38:04.728 --> 01:38:10.728 and see if my, I'm possible method is somewhere where something that 01:38:10.728 --> 01:38:12.438 can help you get out of your own way. 01:38:14.688 --> 01:38:17.928 Because all that's what stops us is we get in our own way. 01:38:18.378 --> 01:38:19.038 Absolutely. 01:38:19.038 --> 01:38:19.128 We 01:38:19.128 --> 01:38:19.398 Rupert Isaacson: do. 01:38:20.538 --> 01:38:25.758 I would, I would say we're even taught to, we're taught that we have to. 01:38:27.408 --> 01:38:34.808 The, the, the Abrahamic way of up bringing up children almost ensures it. 01:38:34.808 --> 01:38:36.248 Yeah, but it doesn't. 01:38:36.248 --> 01:38:36.308 Yeah. 01:38:36.368 --> 01:38:37.988 But the story doesn't have to end there. 01:38:38.288 --> 01:38:38.978 Absolutely. 01:38:39.638 --> 01:38:39.908 John Kippen: Right. 01:38:41.018 --> 01:38:47.048 So to download a pdf DF version, cool collar PDF version with clickable links 01:38:47.048 --> 01:38:53.133 of playing the hand you were dealt, you simply go to john kipp.com/free 01:38:53.133 --> 01:38:54.293 gift free 01:38:54.293 --> 01:38:54.518 Rupert Isaacson: gift, okay? 01:38:54.608 --> 01:38:58.718 John Kippen: You'll be presented with a form to get, capture your name and your 01:38:58.718 --> 01:39:03.458 email address and your phone number, and then you'll be provided a link where you 01:39:03.458 --> 01:39:10.448 can actually download with a password and the password's in the, on the screen. 01:39:10.448 --> 01:39:14.768 But it's just my name, all one word, John, given no, no capital, no spaces. 01:39:15.998 --> 01:39:18.638 And then you can download the book and read it at your leisure. 01:39:18.668 --> 01:39:24.418 And it will give you insights and kind of how my brain works how I've 01:39:24.418 --> 01:39:27.448 accomplished what I've done in my life. 01:39:27.838 --> 01:39:28.168 Rupert Isaacson: Yeah. 01:39:29.188 --> 01:39:30.418 And how to come out of hiding. 01:39:30.418 --> 01:39:31.468 How to come out of hiding. 01:39:31.468 --> 01:39:32.803 Other people are in hiding. 01:39:33.598 --> 01:39:36.208 You know, one can be hiding in that sight, as you know. 01:39:38.278 --> 01:39:38.908 And today's 01:39:38.908 --> 01:39:44.548 John Kippen: world of divisiveness and separation and 01:39:46.678 --> 01:39:47.068 kings 01:39:49.978 --> 01:39:53.038 speaking of a, from American point of view 01:39:53.518 --> 01:39:53.608 mm-hmm. 01:39:54.178 --> 01:39:57.958 There's a lack of hope right now in today's society. 01:39:59.668 --> 01:40:04.168 You know, we're all scared of what AI is gonna do, how AI is gonna replace us. 01:40:04.618 --> 01:40:04.858 Mm-hmm. 01:40:05.698 --> 01:40:10.138 How are we gonna reinvent us ourselves in a world of ai? 01:40:11.968 --> 01:40:15.478 And that's something that's bringing fear to a lot of people. 01:40:18.208 --> 01:40:22.058 So, I don't have all the answers, but I certainly have a lot 01:40:22.058 --> 01:40:23.558 of those questions to pond. 01:40:24.728 --> 01:40:26.618 Rupert Isaacson: Well, a bit of magic always helps, isn't it? 01:40:27.668 --> 01:40:28.328 It does. 01:40:28.658 --> 01:40:29.468 Mm-hmm. 01:40:29.468 --> 01:40:30.188 John Kippen: Absolutely. 01:40:31.328 --> 01:40:34.758 Because a little magic, a little awe and wonder will bring you back 01:40:34.758 --> 01:40:37.818 to those times of your childhood 01:40:38.688 --> 01:40:38.868 mm-hmm. 01:40:38.928 --> 01:40:45.858 Where everything was possible if you had the dream and the vision. 01:40:46.098 --> 01:40:46.458 Rupert Isaacson: Absolutely. 01:40:49.428 --> 01:40:50.298 And it still is, 01:40:51.738 --> 01:40:54.078 John Kippen: and it still is and can be. 01:40:55.338 --> 01:41:00.718 So if you want some coaching just send me an email, go to kipping coaching.com. 01:41:01.468 --> 01:41:05.938 Sign up for a free call and we can chat about what you're hiding from 01:41:05.938 --> 01:41:12.808 and, and see if my impossible method might be able to help you move forward. 01:41:16.048 --> 01:41:16.858 Rupert Isaacson: It's generous. 01:41:17.758 --> 01:41:18.538 Thank you, John. 01:41:19.438 --> 01:41:20.248 Thank you, Rupert. 01:41:20.968 --> 01:41:22.288 I'm sure this won't be the last one. 01:41:24.718 --> 01:41:25.108 Awesome. 01:41:25.558 --> 01:41:25.888 Yeah. 01:41:26.458 --> 01:41:26.908 All right. 01:41:27.538 --> 01:41:34.468 Might ask you to come on again in a few months and have Yeah, I love to do that. 01:41:34.888 --> 01:41:35.518 All right. 01:41:36.578 --> 01:41:39.958 I hope you enjoyed today's conversation as much as I did. 01:41:40.788 --> 01:41:44.538 If you did, please help us to make more. 01:41:44.538 --> 01:41:48.418 Please like, subscribe, tell a friend, give us a thumbs up. 01:41:48.868 --> 01:41:54.118 If you'd like to support us on Patreon, please go to my website, rupertisakson. 01:41:54.438 --> 01:41:54.788 com. 01:41:54.988 --> 01:41:58.168 And if you'd like to find out about our certification courses with. 01:41:58.558 --> 01:42:02.508 autism, education, horsemanship, everyday shamanism. 01:42:02.568 --> 01:42:04.908 There's a whole range of cool stuff. 01:42:05.328 --> 01:42:08.358 Putting a show together like this is not an easy task. 01:42:09.608 --> 01:42:14.538 If you'd like to support us, please consider going to our Patreon page 01:42:15.048 --> 01:42:16.278 and showing us some love there. 01:42:16.918 --> 01:42:22.368 Even the smallest donation, it really helps us to keep the good content coming. 01:42:22.748 --> 01:42:24.678 So go to rupertisakson. 01:42:24.718 --> 01:42:27.303 com and click on the Patreon link. 01:42:28.473 --> 01:42:30.383 Not to mention our excellent merch. 01:42:30.443 --> 01:42:35.523 Please go to our shop and check out some of our really cool 01:42:35.533 --> 01:42:36.923 rock and roll themed merch. 01:42:36.963 --> 01:42:38.763 T shirts, hoodies, all that sort of thing. 01:42:39.283 --> 01:42:40.353 rupertisatson. 01:42:40.393 --> 01:42:41.253 com, it's all there. 01:42:41.313 --> 01:42:44.863 I can't wait for our next guest and also to meet you there. 01:42:45.663 --> 01:42:49.453 In the meantime, remember, live free. 01:42:50.383 --> 01:42:50.933 Ride free.