well hello All You Beautiful
[Music]
People you know what time it
is ladies and gents Guys and Dolls and
everyone in
between gather around get you something
real nice to sip on and comfy to slip
on cuz it's time for smut Club here's
your hosts Elsey and
[Applause]
Hannah hey everybody and welcome to smut
club I'm Hannah and I'm Chelsea and this
is the podcast where we are two licensed
therapists who sometimes daydrink
sometimes don't and review trashy
romance novels review romance novels of
varying caliber yes varying levels of
trash yes yeah um it's funny cuz I
joined like a Facebook group that's like
in my Kindle girly era or whatever I'm
like I'm very like I want to see what
sort of recommendations people are
giving and things like that and there
was one and the girl was like recommend
the smuttiest of the smuttiest smut
you've ever smutted a smut like I want
the dirt okay and then people are like
have you read Denna vipers and I'm like
oh this was the one that I was like
these are our people cuzz everything
else on there is like like a court of
thorn and Roses I was going to say were
they like a court of thorns and Roses
there's like two sex scenes in that
maybe or uh Lucy scores knock them out
is that am I getting that series I don't
know uh I think I think that's right I
feel like those are the general
recommendations so when it was the
smuttiest smut and going through the
list I was like
oh I agree with several of these and
then there were some I'm like really
that's not that smudy I was like have
you read altered by fire
have you read priest we haven't done
that one we haven't reviewed priest it's
on my list though yeah yeah we should do
that one soon we maybe we will maybe
maybe we will but what are we doing
today oh great question today we are
doing ice Planet
barbarians by Ruby
Dixon and Dixon being D IX o n mhm mhm I
grew up with a bunch of people that
their last name was like d i k s o n so
just in case you wanted to look this up
wanted to make sure you had the proper
spelling of Dixon because there's more
than one ice Planet Barbarian so we want
to make sure that you get the accurate
author information if I had a nickel for
every time I picked up the wrong ice
Planet Barbarian
series I would be
Nicholas nicholus
nickelby I'm so sorry okay anyway that
was a very Niche joke that I just made
for all our PBS girlies out there but
anyway I was going to say that's a deep
cut in the best way not mad at that one
at all okay so ice Planet Barbarian is a
dual point of view but honestly for the
most part it doesn't really yeah so we
start with Georgie she is from Orlando
Florida hey um but she has been abducted
by aliens sure yeah that feels like a
thing that happens in Orlando you know
you're not wrong but it does also seem
like these aliens were just like going
around the US finding just plucking yes
humans cuz there's like another girl
that the second book in the series is
about Liz I think she's from like
Oklahoma or something there are like 20
books in this series that's somebody
told me they they went to read the
series and it was like 19 and they were
like I might not be ready for that I
will say all of them well at least I've
read the first two so I'm making an
assumption here but they they all seem
to be standalones from what I've read so
I'm like no part of me feels as though I
need to you're not missing keep pushing
forward I'm like oh I can casually pick
up whenever I want and go forward and so
while it is a long series I wouldn't let
that hold you back because like this
book is like 180 Pages oh okay yeah
that's a nice easy like weekend read or
whatever 1,000% I like I read this one
and then I think I read the second one
in a day like just very easy reading um
but going back because Georgie has been
abducted by aliens and that is a bummer
for her
um well said I was just thinking um I
grew up with a Georgie in Orlando and so
I'm like hey girl like maybe I should
hit her up and make sure she's okay like
did you happen to do you know Ruby Dixon
hey G you're right
like youall have to let us know if you
get a response I'll find out cuz
Georgie's a very specific it is
actually well so Georgie wakes up on the
ship and the there are other women in
the hold with her and they're like don't
scream like it angers the aliens [ __ ]
does not go well yep we've been abducted
but we need to like be smart while we're
here sort of energy m well at least
they're not alone like they have like
each other I guess yes and there's one
girl I think maybe the first one
abducted Kira they uh installed a
translator on Kira's ear so they can't
communicate with the aliens but through
Kira they can understand what the aliens
are saying okay um which is how we come
to find like that they are human
Smugglers and this is their trade but
they actually have girls in like stasis
pods if you will so there are some that
like oh so these were like the main
cargo and then you just like saw us and
just went sure we'll take them as well
like they're it's like when you're at
the grocery store and you have your list
and it's like your meat and veg that
you're supposed to have and then you're
like you know what I would also like
some crackers and like you just pick up
you just pick up the crackers cuz you're
there you just fly over Orlando and see
what crackers are available
Georgie I feel like Georgie would be a
Cheez
It yeah that feels true I don't know why
but that feels that feels right in my
heart um yeah so we have Liz Kira there
are a couple other girls their names
they get their own books at some point
it doesn't really matter for now um but
the ship as like time is going on there
is increasing turbulence with the ship
and like there's a girl there's a new
girl at one point she cries and then
gets sexually assaulted by the aliens
yeah like really not a great situation
and Georgie's like hey guys there's a
lot of us and there's like two aliens
right let's band together and like we
can provide ourselves safety so then
Georgie kind of becomes like the de
facto leader of the group and by that
they're like working on like luring an
alien like
into their cell yeah I guess holding
area uhhuh and uh but then all the other
girls are like we are going to let you
take this ge's like damn it I'm weak too
like we're all like underfed and
dehydrated on this ship but sure so like
she tries to like to throw like the [ __ ]
bucket at him but it's like too weak so
it just kind of like gets everywhere
instead but as this fight is happening
and the turbulence is increasing you
just hear Kira go Detachment
commencing and then they just start
falling and then they're like prepare
for re-entry we're about to crash and
they crash on an ice
sure so the ice Planet barbarians are
not the people who stole them okay
different alien race so the aliens that
stole them were
basically like Pirates Who had extra
booty and they were like we're going to
sink so throw it over yeah like we we
got to cut the weight somewhere and we
we can come back if if we make it
through yes kind of like uh like Firefly
if you yeah a I know right that's
exactly I just got
so just got so wistful about it I tried
to get Vance to watch it with me cuz I
was like telling him how much I loved it
and I I just think like too much time
had passed and like he's like I don't
this isn't really Landing for me the
same way and I'm like that's a for you
Perfection yeah I'm like no notes except
on a couple episodes but outside of
those
no notes and we all know I'm obsessed
with Alan tud I was about to say Alan
Tuda can do anything he wants
anything as wash a oh okay well anyway
I'm going to get in a funk now so we're
on the planet so we're now on the ice
Planet mhm
and uh all they know is that like part
of their ship kind of got peeled back in
in the crash and so they like see snow
coming through it's cold they have like
enough rations and supplies for like one
week and they're like we aren't going to
survive past that and so Georgie's kind
of like she broke her wrist in this fall
at some point oh also she did manage to
kill the guard oh like I think he like
she got his gun and then like hit him
over the head with it cuz she couldn't
figure out how to shoot it but then just
like kept bashing his face in until like
the other girls were like hey girl he's
dead you got him yeah we're all safe now
thank
you so she ends up taking the dead
guard's
clothes and is going out to try and find
means of survival um and there are two
sons in the sky on this planet and so
the girls in the ship like what do you
see she's like do you remember Star
Wars they're like like Hoth and she's
like yeah but we're not on Hoth so they
just call it not ho is how they refer to
the planet the whole time that's really
good
not Hawk
yeah I'm not going to lie for being like
alien romance there are a lot of really
endearing things through it in a way
where like Little Star Wars
references it's just very cute um she
goes to find water and finds this like
warm stream that has like these bamboo
shoots and so she's like she grabs the
bamboo and then like kind of looks down
and realizes it's like attached like a
fanged fish that then like tries to like
whoops yeah so she's like ah this is not
going great and she like then gets
caught in a snare and she like the exact
quot I put it down me I'm just a
Floridian in a stolen space suit with no
weapons and a busted wrist I know how
this is going to
end
like she's like
I you know In fairness to her
like walking around somewhere and sudden
finding yourself attacked by something
with a lot of teeth and then stumbling
into some kind of illegal hunt trap is
very
Florida like that's very classically
Central Florida you know
it yeah you're not you're not wrong I
know it's really
unfortunate
I I've tried to rain it in but for a
while anytime I saw a Florida meme I
would just send it to Hannah but I was
like they also all felt accurate in a
way that I was like damn it the best one
the best ones are the Publix's ones yes
no doubt no
doubt uh I saw like a random ad out of
the corner of my eye that was just the
table scape of a party and I went went
this feels like a public ad it does it
was one like how did you know like
there's just an energy about public
table Escape there's a vibe to a public
right I'm like I don't know what you
want from me um so Georgie passes out in
the snare that captures her but she's
like okay so if I just got caught in a
snare there are signs of intelligent
life right on this planet so that will
maybe work in our favor we now switch
perspectives we meet
vectal v e k t a l
vectal okay how would you say it I
wouldn't say it at all
but but I'm like it's rude not to call
people by name
Hannah
well I feel like I would need to come up
with a nickname for
him because I feel like that's a
playground bully situation waiting to
happen vectal rectal is just on the
table he's 7 ft tall and has horns and a
tail I think he would just kick the
playground kid's ass
it's a fair point I still wouldn't want
to say it I think vectto can take care
of himself in that situation we're not
concerned for veto's well-being
really I mean hear me I am concerned for
his well-being I just also think he can
hold his own noted okay yes okay so we
care but we're not worried because he
he's got it he's very capable
noted he is the chief of his tribe
sure and so he owns he was the one who
set the Trap and is the owner of the
Trap he said it and he cuts her down and
then he immediately like starts VI like
his chest starts vibrating is he purring
for her yes he immediately his kooy nope
k h
UI K Hui okay some of the girls refer to
it as a
cooie okay but you're kooy uh
immediately starts resonating in him and
he's
like it's like been dormant inside me
for so long and it but it starts
vibrating when it recognizes its
mate and so it just like starts singing
when it sees her and he has he's like
this is a very flat-faced creature that
I found flat-faced creature at one point
he's like I find her beautiful flat face
and all
he's an alien Hannah they have different
appearance
expectations they have a lot of ridges
humans have very soft
bodies ruffles have
rges yeah they do and they are also
delicious
okay of all of the things we've
reviewed of all of the
books no no no
I'm looking at your face going but it's
not
flat like you have cheekbones in a nose
like I don't and eyebrows like that's
not flat I think eyebrows are pretty
flat no I mean you know what I mean I
guess like the little bone now I'm just
poking around my face you're brow bone
yes brow bone cheekbone nose bone chin
bone Yeah but I also say all things
considered those of us without
exceptionally Jewish noses I almost said
I wonder if he would say I would had a
flat face I don't think so I think uh in
difference of
races all humans have comparatively flat
faces okay the comparatively part is
helpful okay I'm on board
now I like that I had to throw that word
out even though the whole time like
they're separate races I almost said
like H I don't know that I would be
considered a a flat
facer is that being like a flat
earther
yes but more
anti-semitic okay we're fine
everything's fine we're good we're
good so Vel is like
I'm not quite sure what this being is
but it's clearly my mate and like we are
now attached and it is mine to keep and
protect and she is very fragile and
small and I need to take her to one of
the hunting caves and like get her warm
and like get her safe at this point see
to her right she's been in this snare he
doesn't know how long
yes so when when they get in the cave he
ends up taking her clothes off to check
her over and know notices that like
she's really smooth and hairless and
he's like except in two places on top of
her head and between her legs how
adorable like okie dokie the uh the
alien's experience of observing a human
for the first time was very endearingly
written oh okay yes where he's just like
huh isn't that charming and like on to
the next thing and you're like like lots
of curiosity and like
how adorable and flat-faced and you're
like okay thanks bro love you too not
quite the same but in the slightly like
minimizing capacity um we were having
some family Hangouts last week and then
I was talking to my nephew who's in high
school and I was uh we were just talking
about what he wants to do and be and
he's super into photography right now
and then I was telling him about the
Journey of like becoming a therapist I
was like well you go for your bachelor's
and then you go for your Masters and
then once you get your Masters you have
to do like so many supervised hours and
then this and that and the other and
then you can call yourself a licensed
clinician and this fool who I adore with
every fiber of my being just goes wow
all that for just a
therapist and I was like yep all that
for just a therapist all that to just
sit and
listen that's what you do
right all you do is just sit and let
people tell you things right you just
nod and say how does that make you feel
right and please hear me I was not at
all up like it one of those I'm like you
have no idea what you just
said Gless his heart yeah I was like
cool cool cool cool cool thanks bro I'm
officially no longer cool in my nephew's
esteem got it I don't know if I've been
cool in his esteem for a while but I
wasn't probably wasn't helping my cause
I think I lost out with mine when they
were like six and seven
probably yeah like in my head I want to
be the cool
ant I'm not though yeah I don't I think
that's just more in my like in my heart
what I want to be versus accepting the
reality of what I am which is I'm not a
regular ant I'm a cool ant like that's
100% if I tried to be the cool ant
that's the energy I would give nobody
wants that
um I my old boss when I lived in
Nashville her niece worked on our team
and I guess like our boss was the cool
aunt in their
family but was like super etchy and like
one year like bought all of them
vibrators for Christmas and didn't tell
anyone and just like let them all open
them sure and she just thought it was
the funniest thing that she'd like
pulled that one over and I'm like oh so
this is your cool ant
energy right it's like being like the
edgy cool ant right okay I'm like wow
feel like there's a lot of different
cool ant hats and like lanes that you
can choose
mhh I think you're right it's a choose
your own cool ant Journey yeah I feel
like some people play the cool ant where
they're
like I'll slip you a drink like right
like that sort of cool ant versus the
ones that are just like I don't know
feel like my ants are cool because
we can just sit and have like really
lovely conversations M absolutely that's
what makes them a cool ant not because
of like the bells and whistles just
because of like showing up and being
present yeah which objectively probably
isn't that like like that's the cooling
I want to be which is probably why I'm
not the coolant I'm like just sit and
tell me your feelings but how are
you and they're like tell me your hopes
and dreams Chelsea calm down
please whatever back to vectal so he is
inspecting her to make sure that she's
okay yes he's inspecting her to make
sure that she's okay he keeps noting
that how like smooth and hairy she is
and then he gets a whiff of her genital
region I wouldn't say she's a rouse
she's passed out uh but her natural
scent speaks to him and he just starts
going to town and just starts eating her
out so it's a bold open yes because we
now go back to Georgie who's like I've
had I've been having the weirdest dreams
lately I was abducted I'm have someone
going down on me right now and then she
like reaches down and like feels his
horns and she's like oh this is real
this isn't like okay oh this is actually
happening okay that the alien Smugglers
were also real none of this was a
dream um so he continues to go down on
her and she's like well this feels
really good and we're already here why
why stop him now we're just about to get
to the good part and then he finds her
[ __ ] and she like moans and he pauses
cuz he's like oh like what did I just do
that she like really liked and then he
like spreads her around her
[ __ ] and looks at her amazed and he's
like what like wow what is this thing
and is like very into it later in the
book he's telling the other men in his
tribe about it and he's like and they
have three nipples the third is between
their legs they're like what third
between the legs why is it there and
he's like I don't know but she's really
she really
likes okay that's weirdly cute that's
how most of this book is it's like I
don't want that to be cute yeah it's
like very begrudgingly yeah yeah so he's
just like Amazed by this third nipple
that sure yes and then he's like all
right I'm going to flip her over and
like we're going to mate now and she's
like what like you going down on me was
one thing who even are you yes I don't
know you I'm and so she like kicks him
in the chest and then it goes back to
him and he's like it's almost like she
doesn't want a
mate why did she why would she kick me
it's like she doesn't want me to like
mate her right now or something and
you're like you read that right my dude
yeah yeah good job consent matters it
does every
time um but then he also realizes and I
forgot this like at some point with in
this he has realized that she does not
have a kooy or a Coe or whatever it
is just every time you say that word I'm
going to get that weird smirk on my face
cuz I'm trying not to giggle every
single time that is a fair assessment KY
which
um the planet is uninhabitable if you do
not have a koi so like you will die over
time huh um which we like get more
detail about as the book goes on so it
is a little like clunky because you like
when it's his perspective you he's
talking about it and I'm a little bit
like I don't really know what this is
but there is more explanation later in
the book but he's like telling her he's
like I know you don't have a Koy but we
will get you one like and just talking
to her and she's like I have no idea
what you're saying we don't speak the
same language she's like your tone seems
nice I guess like right and so then
she's like all right well trying to
figure out how to communicate so she's
like trying to share her name and he's
trying to like give his and she's like
Georgie and he's like sh she she's like
nailed it and he's like VL and she's
like hapal and he's like close enough a
so they do get better with the names
throughout the book um it's also funny
because whenever it's from his
perspective and she's speaking to him
he's like what's this weird language
with no vowel
cuz I think their vowels are like more
like guttural if you will so whenever
she's speaking to him like you can
figure out what she's saying but it's
like written with like no vowels like
and like Words jumbled together but
you're like some [ __ ] like things like
that and you're like oh so he has no
idea but you can figure out what she's
trying to communicate a um her stomach
starts rumbling and he tries to give her
his Trav rations uh
which do not taste good she's like the
kindest thing I can say about them is
that they are disgusting she starts like
like puking and she's like I'm gagging I
cannot eat this and he's like but you
need to eat and she's like not that I
don't right and she's like I would love
some water and so then as they start uh
no no
wait I'm getting my my bits of the story
confused the food didn't taste good he
gives her water uh and then he gets her
all cuddled up in The Furs to to stay
warm and she falls asleep and like it's
a it's a nice moment where she feels
safe um as they're leaving the next day
he he's giving her a piggy back ride
because he's 7et tall and the snow is
very deep and he's like we'll just move
faster if you're on my back you weigh
nothing right we've got this y sorry
Vance didn't mean to hit my mic with my
hand I was trying to push my hair behind
my ear
whatever these things happen um as they
are going on this as they are leaving
the the cave and starting their Journey
she's realizing they're going the wrong
way and she's like no we need to go up
the mountain and he's like no we need to
go down the mountain and she's like and
he doesn't understand why she's so
adamant about going up there's all those
women up there like yes which like she
has no way to communicate to him at this
point but so they kind of like get to a
point where he's trying to get her food
and she's like okay once we get food can
we go back up the mountain
um so he's like no problem and that's
their compromise he is catching some
like smaller beast and is uh his people
eat their meat raw and so he's like
giving her what he thinks are like the
choice Cuts yes and he's like oh this is
like the best part and she's like no
what is this I cannot and he's like why
doesn't she want like he's just trying
so hard to provide for his mate and the
new love of his
life very cinnamon roll yes and she has
no
idea she just like sees him being sweet
but like like he gives her the food she
starts
gagging like whoops poor
guy
um they then go to a come like upon a
stream again and like she's like okay
well there's running water it's clearly
warm so like it should be drinkable but
then he's also watching her and is like
she has no concept of safety on this
planet and like the threats like he's
like I've clocked like three different
animals in different places watching us
on this journey and she has no awareness
and he's like even like the kids in our
tribe know not to like Touch the Water
right and so when she starts to go he
like pulls her back and throws like a
stick into the water and all of those
Fang eating fish just like descend upon
it and she's like whoops holy [ __ ] I
would have been dead in like 5 Seconds
yeah so he ends up throwing some berries
in the water that like apparently the
fish hate the smell of and it'll be a
while before the fish come back so
they're able to bathe and he like shows
her how to use the berries as like soap
as well um but then also when they get
out of the water she's like it's nice to
be clean but also it is an ice planet
and I'm very cold and now my hair is
frozen so not quite sure if the tradeoff
may have backfired a little bit yes but
also while they're bathing Georgie's
like oh wow I was unprepared for he he
has ridges everywhere didn't dawn on me
he'd have them on his penis as well like
he's just a rigged fellow a rigged
fellow
sure for her
pleasure as it should
be um so after they're bathing she's
like will you take me up the mountain
and he's like no and she's like all
right I got to use my my womanly ws and
she's like hey vectal do you know how to
kiss kissing is a New Concept to him a
very into it though I bet he's like
what this [ __ ] is the
tits hell yeah and so she's like jokes
on you I'm into that right and she's
like all right if you take me up the
mountain I'll give you more
kisses uh and he's like
okay she found the cheat
codes to the
alien I think it's a pretty easy cheat
code I was going to say maybe not just
to the alien but
like most heterosexual men I
think yeah any ego stroking or yeah
physical stroking is a
he is probably going to yield the
results you're looking for
yeah
yeah I was just thinking the fact that
my husband said this morning that there
are almost no problems that a little
dick can't
fix you
know I think
you also need to make sure to mention
that your husband carries like
half inch sized laser cut wooden dick
wooden dicks around and whenever
someone's having a bad day he just hands
them out and says it looks like you
could use a little dick and quite
frankly I bet it works it does yeah it
does like you can't be mad after that
you really can't it really does turn
your whole day around
yeah because it's also a story to tell
like cuz he'll do it really to anybody
for the most part so then that person
maybe they don't know him all that well
but they now have a story that they get
to
tell it's a good story I also feel like
then like you're in the club oh yeah
it's like you're in theck I've never had
a little dick for
Matt wait what does that mean that I've
never had a little dick from Matt wait
how do I get one like what are the rules
have a bad
day cry a little and front of him don't
do that that's too far he gets very
upset when other people
cry uh pinch your thigh so your eyes
water a little but don't release any
tears correct yeah that's it that's the
line let them well don't let them fall
that's so funny um okay where where are
we she convinces him to go up the
mountain with kissing but it's right he
is like we we're not going to be able to
get there tonight sort of energy so he
takes her back to the cave because her
teeth are chattering because her hair is
frozen because it's [ __ ] cold yeah
because they're on an ice planet and she
bathed in water which I remember like
going on a ski trip in high school or
something and like getting out of a hot
tub and my hair just froze
yep and that was really cold and my feet
were still in like very comfy water MH
I'm not I'm not made for the colder
temperatures I would not do well on an
ice Planet nope me either no I I could
do well in a ski lodge on an ice Planet
if there is a large
fireplace with maybe a comfy rug
situation hot totty moment yes yes a hot
totty and a nice rug with a fireplace
can solve most a lot of life's issues
yeah and then for the ones that don't
solve with that you have little dick as
long as you don't cry as long as you
don't
cry um so when back sees that like she's
shivering he's like trying to take her
back to the cave for the night she's
like I need to get up like I there is
urgency here that he's not understanding
so she tries to leave and or maybe that
I don't remember the exact timeline it
doesn't matter yeah it's fine she tries
to leave and he's calling after her and
she ends up like falling through some
snow into a like Cavern that she's like
okay this is there's a there's a
creature next to me now and she's
looking around and like there's a lot of
creatures in here she's like they kind
of look like
Wookies and then she's like oh like how
cute like they're like little puppies
and she like tries yep Hannah yeah no
they're not no they're probably more
like Gremlins after midnight yep and so
she like reaches out to like Let One
sniff her hand thinking that it's like a
dog and she's like oh more like feral
monkeys and just all start attacking her
until
vectal bust it through into the cavern
and saves her sure um and she's like
maybe I don't know a ton about this
planet maybe I need to slow down right
I'm like yeah listen I get having a
sense of urgency and like trying to
communicate with him and him not
necessarily getting that but also girl
he clearly knows how to survive on this
planet in a way you don't mhm mhm maybe
give the man a little credit right he is
your your faded mate after all sure you
don't know that yet I was going to say I
don't think she's got that yeah no no
she does not have
that so after he saves her he takes her
back to the cave and
uh catches some food for them and she's
like trying to show him like to cook the
meat over the fire for her and he's like
why do they want to burn out all of the
flavor but okay she's like making these
happy little sounds as she eats it so I
guess I'll burn the meat for that's what
she want if burned meat is how what
whatever makes you happy I will burn
some meat for you yes and he's like I
really don't get
this why do they want this flavorless
charred animal when it could be
fresh but anything for love am I right
hey sure right so she's showing him how
to cook the meat but and he's happy that
that she's happy and then as they just
have nothing but time to kill she's just
like pointing at random things and
trying to learn the language and have
him teach her what those words are and
then they run out of things in the
cavern um and also I guess with his
tribe there are people that are like
their job is being hunters for the tribe
so they have hunting caves set up with
supplies so when they're showing up like
there are blankets and there are things
like that in each of these places which
he's like yeah it's rude to not
replenish the supply before you leave
and he's like but I got a mate now and
she takes priority and she's so cold cuz
she's a tiny human and I will like steal
from all of them yeah he's like we'll
we'll come back and restock them at some
point but I'd rather give my mate what
she needs now but just in case you were
wondering what how there were supplies
and the caves are all pre-stocked gotcha
yes and that's like just part of their
culture it's not like these are
his correct personal things it's their
it seems like tribe the like they're are
kind of like hunting regions so it's
like cool if you're in this region
you're going to be using these caves if
you're in like that sort of thing and
I'm not sure I'm not sure their full
setup if they rotate who's in which
region or what have you but sure but
there does seem to be a system to it all
gotcha um but then once Georgie runs out
of things to point out in the cave she
starts pointing at body parts natur
which then they're like both getting
increasingly aroused right and he's
trying to practice self-control because
he's like I'm want to be
respectful she didn't want this before
yeah and
so she like tried like she I forget
exactly what she did but she like put
her hand on him and then he moved it and
she's like why is he like rejecting me
but then she realized that he was just
trying to be a gentleman instead um and
so she's like oh happy to make the first
move no prop Bob why didn't you say so
oh that was all right no no problem at
all I am happy to start this got you
covered Bud um and vectal is like okay
so this is a green light thank you now I
understand he's very into her boobs sure
who's not right I mean not hers just
boobs in general yeah boobs are great
they're very fun yes like I get why
people are so into boobs
yeah mine have changed a lot um over the
years of like having a kid and then my
boobs being like yeah we didn't really
exist pre kid and we'd like to go back
to how we were but the shape has changed
a bit sure we're all just trying our
best out here we do what we can yes um
but but regardless of what her boobs
look like any shape size really boobs
are fun boobs are fun yeah and they're
probably even more fun to an alien who's
never seen them before true
yeah was just thinking of them Steve
Carell 40-Year-Old Virgin yes describing
the boobs yes bags of
sand
what have you ever touched a boob
before
uh I
feel like whoever I watched that movie
with the first time I watched
it they were not the Target demographic
for that style of Comedy right and so I
feel like I never really like gave
40-Year-Old Virgin like I just think of
like two or three scenes and outside of
that I feel like I've kind of forgotten
about it in a way where I'm like I
should go back and rewatch that it's
probably I was like I can think of like
the boob thing
thing and then the um was it miso horny
in that one too was it see see I we're
going to have to go back and watch it
well then I was just uh R I was pivoting
over to role models in my head cuz they
have the whole like LARPing oh that is
really good yes thoroughly enjoy Role
Models yeah hey sexy like a chocolate
cup or
strawberry you want to know what I did
last night
I had a friend named Seth who was a
barista at the Starbucks that I always
went to and that was his favorite line
and so whenever anyone walked in that he
knew hey sexy like a chocolate covered
strawberry didn't matter I love it it
was the best and then but the people who
didn't know that they knew each other
would be like this Barista it's very
forward very forward I'm like no he also
knows their name no note he didn't say
that to you and that it's not because he
thought they were more attractive than
you it's because he's met them before
it's not because you're a regular
strawberry and they're chocolate covered
yes you too are a chocolate covered
strawberry everyone is in their own way
oh that's kind it was nice wasn't it
yeah I was about to get into a whole
fondue pun and then was like we can rain
that in we don't need to we don't need
to dip into other things Mano yes we
were discussing Chelsea wants to name an
animal
Mano and Hannah just
went okay why and I was like oh I really
didn't expect that level of judgment no
it wasn't judgment I was just thinking
like of all like
Mano of all the
cheeses you know what that sounds like
Hannah judg judgment no I'm just
wondering it's curiosity guda feta I
would name pets those as well yes I
would name my my pet
that Bri is too human
yeah too human says the girl with a cat
named Craig and a dog named
Brandon you know H
Touche on that I mean you have a Sophie
I have a Sophie and I have a Fred yeah
and an Annie and a Lizzy you have an
Annie and a Lizzy are the fat
ones they're [ __ ] is that why I
never hear about them I thought I could
name all of your pets
yeah yeah but I apparently they like to
hide from people okay yeah that makes me
feel better that I they just
occasionally like to try to [ __ ] up
Sophie but otherwise they just mind
their own business and they think Gizmo
is their mom so they lay on top of him a
lot does that smother Gizmo a little bit
cuz they now weigh twice what he does
and he doesn't have full range of
movement he doesn't considering his back
legs don't work so he just gets stuck
under them 16 lbs of one of them is 16
lb oh my God yeah 16 lbs of cat
yeah her belly sways when she runs
that's
Annie um I had a former youth student
whose cat was so fat that when they were
doing the Google
Earth what
if you typed in their address there was
like a big black spot on their
driveway it was their cat it was their
cat I don't know that um Annie is that
fat but she is pretty
fat yeah that is a
uh a super sized cat yeah which did you
see that the dude um who did the super
me documentary just died oh really yeah
no I didn't hear that he like died in
the last week with like cancer
complications or something oh man I was
like I forgot how big of a deal super
siiz me was when that came out mhm but
also in a way where like it was a big
deal because some people were like wow
eating McDonald's every day isn't
healthy it's not good for you I it's not
like I didn't know that that was going
to be the groundbreaking part that's the
real shocker here yes is that you know
100 million grams of sodium a day is not
something you should do I had a friend
who used to be uh the cow for
Chick-fil-A at the shop that he worked
at mind you growing up in Florida he was
always out on the street corner and he
was saying their shop whenever like the
person was going to take a turn in the
cow costume they would have them eat a
large bir fry DST and
salt oh to prevent the heat stroke yes
to prevent the heat
stroke and I was like dude this feels
like [ __ ] Florida dude nothing like a
17-year-old slamming a large fry that
just tastes like salt water at that
point like give him a Gatorade at least
or something like I'm like let's keep
those electrolytes up let's not just
like
retain oh my God
like what a while how did any of us
survive to get
out that's a separate issue
but but you know I also know a lot of
people that like absolutely did the
thing where they like got out did their
time away and like moved right back to
like have kids and look as happy as can
be and I got to say I'm happy for them
I'm very happy for them and no part of
me feels a strong desire to like move
back no at all like I feel like there
would have to be some pretty big things
with the Universe telling me that like
that was the move um but when I see them
just casually post that like like going
to the beach on a whim in the afternoon
I was like that was something I
definitely took for granted was just
being able to just oh I can just go
watch the sunset at on the beach every
night like oh that's not how everyone
else lives their life not even in
Central Florida we don't have that no
I'm like oh that does sound nice yeah no
and you're like and that's why I think
about it less than you do cuz I didn't
have that to fall I mean we were still
like only 3 hours from the beach so it
was a very easy weekend trip or whatever
um yes or even day trip it wasn't that
bad of a day trip really yeah um but no
not not so much on a whim really but
then the flip side of that was like
always living in the hurricane flood
zones 100% so like as soon as anything
was officially like coming our way
they're like
well you probably need to leave again
right like it was a tradeoff easier
access the water it always is but then
also the water has easier access to
you fair point just saying um all right
so they're playing the the body part
naming game I was like we were on boobs
and
we that feels on bar um and
oh yeah he's really into her boobs she
learns that his dick has like a little
like knob on the top um which like hits
her [ __ ] perfectly during so she's like
very into this and so he's thrilled
because they have now mated and they
just go round for round and as she's
like finally falling asleep she's just
like good thing we're different species
so I can't get pregnant oh honey right
just
that feels blindly optimistic well and
in his mind he's like we're basically
married now yes this is She's mine now
we've consummated she's going to have
all my Barbarian babies it is a
solidifying [ __ ] of of their future and
he's like she could be pregnant with my
kid right now yeah meanwhile she's like
just trying to get some alien strange
take a
nap yep like and and his his kooy won't
stop purring in his chest cuz it is like
so content which is very sweet um so
they sleep then in the next morning he
goes out to check the traps that he'd
set and in the snow he finds a human
foot and he's like oh [ __ ] that's why
she wants to get up the mountain she's
not alone right and he's like okay I get
it now I get it now we can move and so
cuz he like pulls her out and it's one
of the girls from the ship but she cried
a lot and so I don't think they were
that that sad that she was the one that
went off on an exploratory the crier so
she
died yeah it was just the foot I thought
I was like it's sticking out of the snow
and he like pulls it up that's what I
was thinking but it's just a foot well
they did
mention to be fair I don't remember
these details over say it's not really a
relevant detail but she's dead well no
but to your point they like cuz you see
the red hair and I think when I read
that they they he found the foot I in my
head I interpreted as like disconnected
from the body then like saw the body in
the red hair but to your point he could
have just pulled a
foot regardless he now knows there are
other other humans and they got to move
with some
urgency so they get up to the ship site
and when they get there snowballs start
hitting them cuz the girls have no other
way to protect themselves and J's like
stop [ __ ] throwing snowballs at me
and they're like wait you're alive she's
like yes I'm alive stop throwing
snowballs at me I brought help and he
has an amazing
dick
yes I'm imagining that's Georgie's
energy a little bit uh but it is funny
because they she goes in the ship he
ends up coming in the ship as well and
she's like giving them all of the Furs
and blankets that she collected um and
at one
point he has like the his kills on his
belt like some of the animals that that
he caught in the traps and one of the
girls is like can I have that like is
that for us can we eat that and so
Georgie goes over and like pulls on his
belt and it's like can can I have this
and he's like you want to mate in front
of everyone and Kira like translates it
and she's like no no no no no not asking
to [ __ ] you
just asking if we can eat the dead
animal he's like it's not that I'm not
into it I'm just a little
surprised and so then uh Georgie asks
for fire so that they can cook the meat
for the other
girls and he's like explaining to Kira
because we he realizes that like she can
understand him that he has to go back
down the mountain cuz like where their
ship crashed really isn't
anything right it's pretty bare so he
has to go back down it to get supplies
um then he tells Kira he's like look
after my mate while I'm gone and so like
as he leaves Georgie's like wait mate
what what do you mean
mate huh no come back what's a mate I
have I have some questions are you
Australian I just thought it was good
dick but but it's also funny because
when she ask for like hey can you make a
fire so we can cook the meat one of the
girls is like I'll suck his dick if he
can make a fire at this point like and
George's a little like back the [ __ ] off
she's like hold on if anyone is sucking
dick for fire here it's me I am the
primary dick sucker in this group the
primary dick
sucker number one dick sucker hey should
get
mugs sorry going to be in this smut Club
swag shop our merch store whenever we
have one number one dick
sucker
what what I was just thinking about just
like all of
like the random mugs that people get
gifted oh sure and then I was thinking
about using those on a worklink and
not realizing what mug you picked up
that morning and then your boss is like
what does that mug say and then
you have a meeting with HR later that
afternoon a little
toast nothing a little dick can't solve
right hey
um of course that only really works in
the remote work world I feel like you
would notice if you left the house with
it yes so if we do put put them in the
swag shop we should make them uh we
should make them the color of your new
water over there oh shart
truce I don't know why I just Vana
whiteed that because you know what you
won't accidentally take something that
says number one dick sucker and disch
charge ruse into work with you that's
true that is a conscious choice if you
take that into work with you it's also
not like you probably have that many
other mugs that are this color you're
not going to get it
confused well you might I might that
that would be a real bummer for you yes
yes it would but also you work at the
same place as your husband so he might
be walking around work a little more
proud little extra pep in the step you
know um so vecto goes to get fire
supplies and such and when he comes back
one of the girls is coughing and Georgie
is like do you have any
and he's like medicine won't help that's
the Koy
sickness um but once again they're like
so much of a language barrier cooties
yeah like coy coy Cy like what is this
um and so there there aren't enough
language skills to fully explain it so
we just kind of live in that confusion
but also as VL is like making like
cooking all of the meat he keeps handing
it to Georgie because he's like she as
small and frail as everyone else she
needs this food too but every time he
hands it to her she hands it to one of
the other girls because in her head
she's like he's been feeding me for
several days they need this more but
then he's getting more and more annoyed
cuz he keeps trying to take care of his
mate and she keeps giving away
everything that he's doing for her just
let me help you yes yeah um and one of
the other girls is
like Georgie just does he know like we
don't want to stay here like this is not
our end goal
and how do you think he's going if he
thinks you are his mate how do you think
he's going to respond to that and she's
like
yeah haven't you know let's get out of
the ship that feels like a tomorrow
problem only so much I can do we're on
basic survival right now can't worry
about the state of relationships and
getting off this planet and all that
other [ __ ] yes and so then when all of
the girls go to sleep for the night uh
vectal starts like trying to put the
moves on Georgie and like all of the
girls are giggling and laughing do I
have something on my head you itching
your head scratch I was scratching you
scratched it and made eye contact so
intentionally that I was like I'm I
can't tell if her scratch is that no
that big or if she's letting me know it
was really irritating me like I had a
hair there or something and I was like
do I have a hair but I don't think I do
anyway so the girls are giggling Beck's
trying to get it
yes and put in his head he's like well
apparently humans aren't as sexually
open as my people who knew like figuring
out my mate as we go but she seems to
not want me to mate her in front of
everyone we're more open people
um so the next morning as they're
talking about the rescue plan like all
the girls like cool so we're going with
you and he's
like it is a multi-day walk back to my
tribe if that is just me moving like I
it's going to take forever yes he's like
I none of you have shoes none of you
have clothes like none of you have
anything you need to be able to like
make this move well so George and I are
going to go back we're going to get
support and like get a bunch of people
from the tribe then we will all come
back and rescue you together so hold
tight until then essentially um which
the girls like aren't thrilled about but
what else are you going to do and they
get it at that point what's the
alternative really yes so uh vectal and
Georgie leave the girls behind and he's
like he's like yeah I took this like
winding mountain path last time he's
like I am going as the crow flies and
just getting as as clear through as I
can and he goes we're going to need to
stop for like just the night um and
we're going to stop in the elders cave
and when they go in the elders cave it
has like very smooth walls and it's like
this does not look like any of like the
other like manmade caves and he's like
yes this is like the magic cave that the
elders came from essentually yeah the
magic cave
yes they bone in the cave and then as
she's laying there after they've boned
and she's like what's that blinking
light and he's like oh that's magic and
she's like I don't think that's magic
and asks him to like help her like break
the ice wall and she realizes like it is
a spaceship that they are in
oh yes and so when they they break
through the wall and what was flashing
was like the control panel board and
she's like do I hit this button and turn
it on feels like good things never
happen when you hit the button but like
I think I'm going to hit the button yeah
she's like what the [ __ ] Choice do I
have right so when she hits the button
it turns on the computer as the system
is booting up uh we learned some things
about like vectal people are called like
the I don't know s AK
H sock I was going to say I think that's
sock yeah that's what I thought as well
okay um but they actually crashed on
this planet like
287 years ago or something like that and
there had been like 60 people on the
ship at the time um and some survived
but others didn't because of the koi
illness which we then
learn finally get some details about it
that it's like a nitrogen like gas
element in the air that's just like
inhospitable and so if you do not have
uh a what did they call it a symbiot is
like what the computer called it a Koy
um you would not survive so you and the
Koy live
in I don't know Harmony symbiosis so a
koi is Like A Parasite or something like
it's an
it is another entity that is like the
essence of life is what vectal and his
people refer to it as but it's also like
it it shifts your body chemistry a
little so you heal faster um things of
that capacity you are warmer so cuz I
think the computer ask like oh what do
you want me to set the temperature to
the human ideal temperature or the sock
ideal temperature which was like for
humans the computer was like yeah I'd
set it to 72 f the sock I set it to 37
fah oh
yes um so she's learning more about the
Ki and the the symbiosis and all of
these things and she's like okay these
are some helpful details to have
um the computer also says that like
pretty much once you're on the planet
like you kind of need a koi within about
like 8 days because your body is going
to continue to De compensate and
deteriorate okay
the ship can also do like linguistic
updates So it's talking it's able to
talk to VL and explain things that it's
able to talk to Georgie then it's like
do you want us to do a one-time language
update for you she's like yeah so it
like does a retinal scan and then I
don't sends a Power Burst it hurts she
passes out but when she wakes up she can
speak the sock language cool so then she
can communicate with her partner which
I'm sure and she can understand him now
so it goes both ways yes nice
so wouldn't that that would be a really
cool superpower to have to be able to
like immediately just like download and
understand any language now there are
like a couple moments where like more
modern slang right didn't necessarily
catch up
287 right years later but like they're
so the stock people are so far removed
from this that
like VL had no idea that their people
had crashed and like that is how they
ended up on this planet right uh he he
just knows this is the elder cave that's
filled with
magic but I'm like what was the magic
was the magic just a blinking light this
whole time yeah so like they their I
would imagine oral tradition like seems
like it went away pretty fast that it
was like they lost all of that yeah well
and I can imagine that if you crash onto
an ice planet and it's been almost 300
years right and if you were losing a lot
of people because they did not have a
kooy mhm that like having that like oral
history probably wasn't a priority right
initially I love that we're really going
into the we're like super into it right
now yeah it's good anyway the important
details of this book well now I'm
thinking like wait a minute wait a
minute how long have white people been
in America like okay well you know
actually
like okay our oral tradition probably
would have deteriorated if we didn't
have all the technology that we have
which clearly they didn't have the
resources for yeah technology goes a
long way with uh being able to like
maintain and preserve history yeah yeah
so when you live on an ice Planet feel
like your options are a little more
limited we have other priorities I take
it back I get
it well and I feel like that becomes one
of those things that like you're
probably is this folklore or is this
like our our real whatever so they she
gets the language update they make it
all the way back to his people his
people are like what who is what's this
yes like they walk into like the the
caves and a little boy goes mother why
is it so
ugly oh I that's one of the moments that
vector's like and I love her flat face
and all
incredible it really is cuz he's like so
offended for his M why is it so ugly and
Georgie's like wait you think I'm the
weird looking one all of you have
[ __ ] Tails like like excuse me you
horned weirdo yes one of the healers uh
goes to look at Georgie's wrist and
she's like I can reset it for you uh
she's like but you don't have a kooi and
like the way I am a Healer is like my
kooi has ability to like encourage yours
to work harder to repair and and heal
faster so she's like I can reset your
wrist for you but like you kind of got a
janky wrist until yeah until you have a
kooy you just have a janky
wrist um but then we're also learning a
little bit like Georgie is talking to
her and just understands more of how the
Koy resonance works and that like the
Koy decides and like you might not like
the person but it's also like you are
now mine and I am now yours and like so
one of the things that they mentioned is
that like once you have uh like
resonated with someone when you continue
to deny the mating it like becomes like
a more urgent sense within you and so
the fact that like she doesn't have a
kuy and it took them so long to make
just learning more of those details so
she's more understanding now that like
this self-control that he had and like
the respect that he was showing took a
lot more intention and energy maybe than
she was giving him credit for and like
is maybe understanding his behaviors
more yes I think I think understanding
like the I was caught in a snare and
then when I woke up a man was like we
will be together forever right a man
with horns and a tail and blue skin and
ridges on his [ __ ] like Hey what how did
we get here yes and so this is also
where like veal is telling the men in
the tribe about the human women and
they're also really excited because it's
a harsh planet to live on and their
tribe is not huge at this point right
and so there are I think about like 20
adult males that like are essentially
single and there's like four adult women
in the in the whole tribe so they're
like wait there's more
women sign me up I'll put my shoes on
right now I volunteer his tribute to go
on a rescue mission
um but when vcal is describing the human
women he goes they have no tails and
their mouths are small and they do not
have fangs they cannot eat fresh meat
they must cook it until it has no flavor
and a third nipple on her
sex like this
is what a description thanks
buddy which I think it might be in the
second book that uh the dude he's like
oh here's the third nipple he was
talking about and the girl's like say
say what now I found it she's like did
you just call it a
nipple it's
not
oh um when like technically he's not
wrong about any of it but it's not it
doesn't feel
flattering no 1,000% but he's like finds
it so endearing and he's like she's a
he's like she's such a unique creature
like I still find her beautiful it's so
sweet honestly when he gets back to
their cave uh Georgia Georgie gives him
a [ __ ] and he is very into the work
that human mouths can do I imagine the
lack of things really improves The
Experience he's very into the work that
human mouth can
do number one dick
sucker he's very into the work that
mouths can do feels like the magnet
fridge
poetry of someone be like try and put
[ __ ] like they don't have the words
for it okay how can you write blowj job
with the magnets you have very into the
work mouths can
do hey babe what that mouth
do so as they're in their like
postcoidal
cuddle Georgie's like your your purring
has stopped and he's like oh yeah like
it's very content after we mate and so
it it Qui it quiets for a while and he's
like but it'll stay once we have a have
a kit of our own and she's like a
what the [ __ ] you mean a kid we're
different species who needs birth
control we're different
species Panic U yes and re's like the
Koy always chooses a fertile female like
and she's like wait so it's not like
this is your soulmate it's like this is
your fertility mate is kind he's like
yeah you know a little like that and
she's like what the [ __ ] so I could be
pregnant right now and he's like yes so
excited he's like all of my dreams have
finally come true read the room veal oh
my God he
cannot oh but she also like gets it cuz
at one point she's like it's hard to be
mad at someone who doesn't understand
why you're upset you're like oh you're
not wrong yeah she can still be upset
just not at him he didn't do it on
purpose exactly like it's just the way
of the people and the customs and and
the things so the next day or however
long it takes them to get back to go
Rescue all of the human women when they
get there the women are in rough shape
like one is like pretty much in a coma
none of them can really move it smells
horrific I'm sure right um and so the
the men come down and are like helping
to try and like take care of them and
get them warm and making warm broth and
things like that and someone starts like
purring and they're like who the [ __ ]
just resonated but like no one will own
it awkward they're like but they also
know that like the women might not want
to stay and so from Vil's perspective
he's like yeah it's kind of an awkward
situation to be like this is the person
that my soul Longs for who is now my
essence of being and they might not want
to be here so like maybe I'm not going
to tell them quite yet I think it's more
like their impression of
it um so Georgie is talking to the other
girls and is like
listen these are our options we can we
can stay with them we can go back to
their tribe they will like accept us as
their people we can fight like or we can
try and figure out a way off the ship
like and off the planet at this point
like so with no sources and no ship and
no anything and the threat of like those
traffickers coming back well and so
that's the whole thing is like the girls
are like do you like we couldn't we
can't we can barely stand up let alone
defend ourselves let alone not even
defend ourselves go on the offensive
right right and they like we think
staying with with the blue alien tailed
people sounds like a solid choice at
this point comfortable with that yes so
then George is like oh veal forgot to
tell you so I know you were really
excited about rescuing these five women
we got like another six in the stasis
pods hope you're not mad and he's like
why would I be mad I'm ecstatic our
tribe is
thriving he's like listen our potential
mate op options have like tripled like
this is fantastic 1,000% he's like I see
no issue the biggest issue is
transporting everyone back we can do
that no skin off my nose happy to yep
like Piggy backs all
around
heyo then as they are working on like
getting the women out of the stasis pods
um vectal is explaining that they're
going to hunt a beast called a
SOS I don't know sure felt a little
russan um a little bit Yeah essentially
it's a giant beast that's filled with
kooy so whenever you need a c like you
have to kill the beast but then like
there's enough kooy for everyone who
will need one it's not like you have to
kill
all um but they also say that like when
uh they have kids that like their kids
will need a kui as well and so they
whenever there's a new birth in the
tribe they go on the hunt to kill one so
that the child will
survive because you know nitrogen in the
air gets a little right well I hope aui
is not finite a finite resource I was
wondering that yeah and there you know
I've only read the first two so I guess
there are 19 more books for me to
discover if they're there's a a kooy
shortage yes I'm like are they mating
and reproducing because I hope so what
happens if you kill all of the
Sak such a hard K I really
try you nailed it um then as this is
going on there's like a high-pitched
wine and Kira like claps her hand to her
ear where she has the translator and
then collapses oh and then like all of
the women are wincing and then all of
The Trackers that they have in their
arms from the OG aliens start like
lighting up and they're like we need to
get out of here the aliens are coming
back MH um people are like bet you're
you're coming with us no problem at all
let's also maybe cut those trackers out
of you and so they all leave and they go
on the hunt for a
Sak love it every time and each
pronunciation is a little different it
just they all have a hard K on the end
that's the only consistent thing starts
with an s ends with a hard K SOS nailed
it I feel like I would say that in
Europe and just get punched in the face
accident
yeah like what do you say about my M
like insulted someone's mother 100%
absolutely so they get all of the women
and they get the trackers out of them
and they go and hunt the giant beast and
then they kill the giant beast and then
koi essentially look like glowing worms
so it's like a parasite like organism um
that enter you through they like like
vectal like cut like puts a little cut
on Georgie's neck and like that's how it
enters so she doesn't eat it okay it
just Burrows and I don't know if if if
burrowing is
worse burrowing feels
worse initially but then also you don't
have to
swallow I heard
it I really didn't
think I didn't think you know end of
sentence no comma yeah yeah
yeah so all of the women get a kooie
sure and
then vectal and Georgie have their
solidifying [ __ ] is like actually being
fully resonated and mated um she
introduces him to doggy style which most
of the time they don't do because they
have tails right and he has that little
nub on the top of his dick so she loves
the little ass play action and he loves
it as well and it's something that he
never thought was an option H right
because he didn't think any of this was
an option until like 4 days ago right
and then his life changed cre with new
Anatomy yeah then as they're [ __ ]
they see the alien
spaceship come over and then leave cuz
the ship was
empty and now they're here for good the
end
wow wow yeah what a journey you're
welcome yeah
yeah okay what are your thoughts as
someone who did not read
that um my first thought is every time
you said Koy all I could think was Kio
colani which was
the the last queen of the Hawaiian
people which is not relevant so great
trivia fact though thank you yes um
so there was that do you have question
questions I mean
yeah duh I mean I don't feel like you
could hear a synopsis of that and not
have follow-up questions that is fair
like does everybody live in one cave was
the cave they entered like a little town
or a village there are more details that
I just like didn't necessarily go into
where it seems that there's like one big
like Central cave and then there are
like little pod caves that are like
where people live individually but there
is like a community area that has um
like a river running through it a creek
sort of thing so they have a place to
bathe and gather and things of that
capacity okay okay well that's good
yes but also there're probably other
details that like we won't learn about
until Book 15 well I also am wondering
if George she is pregnant she is oh okay
yes I mean I assumed um but what I found
interesting because then read the second
book which is about Liz who's like super
snarky and
honestly I didn't find her that
endearing like I enjoyed the book but I
like didn't love Liz
um she gets pregnant as well because
pretty much you resonate and then if you
start [ __ ] you're going to get pregs
is the energy it's giving but then we
learned that their uh pregnancies are
like 35 months long Jesus
Christ yes and I that is where I have a
lot more questions that I don't have
answers to me I had questions about like
the compatibility and like what does
this alien pregnancy look like and what
does that do and what is the birth like
and like what's a hybrid like and all
that [ __ ] right but 35 months I feel
like I don't want the answers to any
other questions well and also Al you got
to think how quickly was Ruby Dixon
dropping these books in the series
because if it takes 3 years and like all
of these books are like back to back
where they're initially meeting I'm like
how long before we actually see a
pregnancy all the way through it could
be book three find out what a little
hybrid looks like yeah valid questions
okay what is our rating system for today
though um worms
when you when you said that for some
reason all I thought of was
um the office when Kelly is
like wants to lose weight yes and she's
like I hate this thing inside me when
she's like Creed gave it to me he's like
that wasn't a tapeworm that wasn't a
tapeworm that honestly I was thinking
like so they're they're eating a
tapeworm like yeah that was kind of yeah
but no the tapeworm is just burrowing on
its own
I don't have a different I don't have a
better word than burrow but it does feel
worse somehow yeah um okay I think worms
are a great option yeah let's go like
out of
like 500 worms worms are very small
that's true and I don't know how many
are
[Laughter]
inoc but I probably not that that many
we can go out of 100 okay
okay I would probably go like
55 okay maybe
60 okay I think I would maybe go yeah
like 55 to 60 we can 57.5 worms oh no
not a half 57
worms 57 worms I'm comfortable with that
57 out of
100 c
worms sure they glow worms cotie worms
circle circle dot dot I got my kooy
shot I also was thinking about ringworm
really repeatedly in the whole time you
I was
like let's not do that many ring worm
that would not be ideal that's
horrifying yes um but honestly I it's a
very endearing yeah read it sounds cute
yes cute and kind of fun and like a
little different yeah I I haven't
necessarily read anything exactly like
it it was very
Charming uh and sure there are moments
where you're suspending belief but
like you got smuggled by aliens onto an
ice Planet you're suspending belief from
the jump right right so I would
recommend reading it I do think it is
charming I think that there's a lot that
like I couldn't necessarily capture that
was cute but would actually recommend
commend the read if that is a genre that
that you are into and actually quite
frankly even if you aren't someone who
like has historically read like alien or
Monster smut or or things of that
capacity I feel like this felt very like
approachable yeah like very like entry
level yeah yeah so if you're interested
in exploring yes exactly if you're like
oh I'd like like I've never read
anything in that genre maybe I would be
interested this is one to try it on H
for sure
all right and if you don't like it you
don't need to read the next 20 in the
series yeah you can cut your losses you
can stay where you are it was it's like
180 pages that it is a quick read it is
low investment yes absolutely yeah all
right well let us know how many kooey
worms don't know why but every time it's
just something about the words uh how
many worms you would rate this book
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thanks for coming and hanging with us
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us yeah we appreciate you smut [ __ ] we
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[Music]