Historical Homos

To access extended episodes of Historical Homos, join our Patreon. 
Our community awaits with legs open and lips parted 🤤

www.patreon.com/historicalhomos

Why oh why are men so obsessed with our penises?

Join us today as we embark on a dick-scented odyssey to answer one of the 21st century's most urgent questions.
  • 5,000 years ago, the Mesopotamians said their gods' divine jizz created the world. 
  • The Egyptians agreed, worshipping the power of giant, divine cocks.
  • Which is also why they cut their enemies' dicks off after a battle to present to Pharaoh.
  • The Greeks then argued for a tiny, cropped penis...which is a lot BETTER for procreation, actually, thank you Aristotle for saying that!
  • The Romans made everything about horse cocks and sexual domination. Shocker.
  • And the Christians – well, the Christians would prefer you stop talking such FILTH, you disgusting sinner!
It's been a distressingly complex couple of millennia for humanity, full of all this penis pandemonium. We've sent shuttles to the moon, but we still can't figure out our own shafts.

Is the dick really divine? Or is the penis a spiritual problem? Will we ever master our members? Or do we have to accept that our schlongs belong to another side of ourselves?

Join Bash and his brilliant, hilarious guest – author and playwright R. Eric Thomas (https://rericthomas.com) – as they try desperately to answer all these penile questions.

Now, come on in! The water is...human temperature.

🎧 Listen now on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Apple Podcasts⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or wherever you pod. Penis weights and hung garden gnomes sold separately.

📱 Follow Historical Homos on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and do ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sign up to our newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you care about gay people, like, at all.

⭐ Most importantly, if you like what you hear, please do leave us a ⭐ FIVE STAR ONLY ⭐ review on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.

Episode Credits
Written and hosted by Bash
Edited by Alex Toskas
Produced by Dani Henion
Guest: R. Eric Thomas

© Sebastian Hendra 2026
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

What is Historical Homos?

The world's only no-fucks-given guide to LGBTQ+ history. Join Bash and his brilliant guests each week as they wrench The Gayest Stories Never Told from history's deepest, darkest closets. Sign up on our website, and follow us on Instagram @historical.homos and TikTok @historicalhomos