Transcript

Speaker 1: The Lord looked down from his holy height. From heaven he beheld the earth to hear the groaning of the prisoners, to release those doomed to die.

Speaker 2: You are listening to Scripture for your inner outcasts. It's Tuesday, August 4th, 2026, the Memorial of Saint John Vianney. Today's guest presenter is Casey Kimble, a doctoral candidate in historical theology at Boston College.

Speaker 1: Psalm 102, which we read today, describes God, who, although he is above his creatures in every way, does not hoard his superiority or laud his greatness over us, but bends down, condescends to encounter us precisely where we are. Verses 18 to 19 say, the Lord looked down from his holy height. From heaven he beheld the earth to hear the groaning of the prisoners, to release those doomed to die. We might say that our needs provoke God, provoke him, that is, to show us kindness and compassion. Today we celebrate Saint John Vianney, known for the long hours he spent here in confessions, responding to consciences laid bare with God's own mercy and healing in just the way this Psalm describes. While both Scripture and witness make a strong case for going to confession, in reality, it's not always so easy. I became a Catholic almost eight years ago. The confession remains very difficult for me. I experience varying degrees of anxiety when I try to do an examination of conscience, and I'm often flooded with blind terror and near-panic as I wait in line. This presents quite a predicament. On the one hand, I know that confession is not only necessary, but a good gift from God who desires to relieve my burdens and pour out his healing grace on my soul.

Speaker 1: On the other hand, my experience of preparing for and going to confession is often confusing, painful, and overwhelming. How can something that is supposed to be so good feel so bad? Trying to figure this out and get some relief was one of the main things that brought me to parts work. So let me share with you two parts of my own system that I think are at play in the conundrum that is confession. One of my perks is burdened by a very scary image of God. Growing up in Protestantism, she was exposed to some graphic descriptions of hell, as well as warnings that even if she thought she had faith, try to love God, and even wanted to be with him, she could always be deceived. There was always the possibility that she could end up in hell on a technicality. Constant vigilance was the only way to prevent such an outcome. The same fears and tendency to vigilance followed her into Catholicism and are provoked by confession. What if her examination of consciousness incomplete or imperfect? What if she forgets or is unaware of. Or worse, willfully blind to mortal sin and only finds out when it's too late. I have another part that's very nervous about exposing her needs. Some experiences early on in life taught her that sometimes her needs could provoke the shame of others, causing them to respond with criticism, impatience, and even anger.

Speaker 1: Laying out her sins and wounds in confession is frightening because it involves the risk that God, despite what someone says, is similarly insecure and thus unable or unwilling to respond to her with healing and mercy. I know that the images of God held by these two parts aren't accurate, but I've also learned that attempting to dethrone their God images by force doesn't work. What can go a long way, however, are experiences of being loved in the way that we know God actually loves us. And I had one of these experiences just last week. I was on retreat at a monastery, and my vigilant heart was going round and round about whether I committed a mortal sin. And it became painful enough that I asked to meet with a priest. He was a stranger to me, and I had no idea how he'd react to my delay. He received me and my adult parts in exactly the way Psalm 102 describes, hearing the groanings of my parts and helping to release their burdens. I think they're going to need some more healing, but I'm grateful for this little bit, for this experiential taste of what God is really like.

Speaker 2: Souls and hearts offers a three hour course which includes internal family systems, experiential exercises all about reconciliation and the Eucharist. You can find it linked in the description below.

Speaker 1: Let's end with our invocations. Our Lady, our mother, our entire amounts. Pray for us. Saint Joseph, pray for us. Saint John the Baptist pray for us. Saint John Vianney, pray for us.