Morgan Teruel: Thanks for tuning in to the Sandals Church podcast. Our vision as a church is to be real with ourselves, God, and others. We're glad you're here, and we hope you enjoyed this message.
Donna Martin: Well, hello Sandals Church. My name is Donna Martin, and I am so excited to bring God's word to you. Me and my family have been a part of Sandals for almost six years, and we have just been so transformed by the gift that Sandals is to our church and to our family. And so I, again, am so honored to stand in front of you. And also, Mother's Day.
I yes. Happy Mother's Day to all of you that are out there. I am doing the mom thing just like you. I've got three kids, and I know that May sometimes is a extremely busy month for moms. You know, we call it May because May is almost as busy as the month of December.
You got proms and promotions and graduations and all sorts of things going on, and a lot of times moms, we are on the front line of the crazy. Right? And so thank you from to moms to all that for all that you do. Thank you for what you do for your children. Thank you for being on the front line of the crazy this month.
You know, I remember when my daughter was about three years old, And she runs into my room and she goes, mom, there is a witch in my backpack. And I was like, no. You know, like, I mean, she now I know that this is her Dora the Explorer backpack. And so, you know, if you've ever watched the show, Dora, stuff is coming out the backpack, like things that are gonna help. And I'm like, no, honey.
It's okay. Like, just go play. Just go play. And she goes, no, mom. There's a witch in my backpack.
I'm like, no. You're fine. Okay. Go play. Five minutes later, she runs back in.
And she goes, mom, little bit more emphatically this time, there is a witch in my backpack. And I'm like, no, Denise. There is not. I'm like, you know what? Just take your backpack outside.
Maybe you're thinking of the grumpy old troll. You know, there's something. No, honey. It's fine. Just it's fine.
Just take your take your backpack. Take it outside. Go handle it. Right? Well, then about five minutes later, she runs back in.
And at this point, she is crying, she is shaking, she is emphatic. She goes, mom, there is a witch in my backpack. So about that time, my mama bear comes up. Right? And I'm like, what?
You know? Now if you know me, you know I don't play about no demons. Right? And so I was like, get the oil. Right?
Get the anointing oil. We are gonna go handle this. So I'm walking down the hall, getting ready to go handle the witch that is in her backpack, but I'm also a little freaking out because I'm not sure what I'm like, is it a rat? Like, what is in this kid's backpack? So I'm ready to go, ready to do spiritual warfare, ready to handle the witch in her backpack.
And so I peer into this backpack, and when you know it, what what it was, it was an old black dried up banana peel. And it had it was it was old as Moses. It was standing straight up, standing straight up in her backpack just and it was black and gross, and she said it was a witch. And I'm like, I see how you got that. I see you know, she thought it was she thought it was the top of the witch's hat, and I was like, I'd actually rather deal with the demon than deal with this nastiness.
Right? And I'm like, okay. Gross. And if you're a mom, I know you have found some crazy things sometimes in your child's backpack. But you know what we're gonna talk about today?
You know, you might have, you might see that there may be some things hidden in your backpack. Some things that the Lord wants to bring to the surface.
Pastor Fredo Ramos: At Sandals Church, we believe that giving is a critical part of following Jesus. And so if this message or any of our content has helped you in your journey of following him, would you support our work by going to sandalschurch.com/support and making a contribution there. Grace and peace.
Donna Martin: You know, when I I grew up, I came from a pretty broken family. I grew up in poverty for most of my life, and I had to deal with a constant heartache of a father who walked in and out of my life repeatedly. My mother did her best. She kept us in church. She taught us about the Lord, the importance of faith and education.
But there was always this wedge in our family, somewhat that exists to this day. It lingers to this day. And on January first of this year, my dad, who I haven't seen in sixteen years, called me and I had to make a choice. We're gonna talk about forgiveness today, and I understand that on Mother's Day, that can be an extremely uncomfortable topic. So some of you might have a story like mine about a parent that has walked in and out of your life or growing up in poverty.
Some of you may have stories that are unimaginable, things that have happened to you that are hard to even talk about. But if you have chosen to love Yes. None of us escapes the pain that may come through relationships. Correct. And there comes a point in all of our Christian lives where we are tested in this area and we are admonished to live an authentic faith, a real faith.
See, I don't think anything tests the authenticity of our faith more than forgiveness. Because the entire foundation of our faith is on a God who loves and a God who forgives. We're gonna go to the scripture. We're gonna go Matthew six fourteen through 15, and we've been walking through the book of Matthew this year as a church, and it's been incredible just to feast on these scriptures, and this is a hard one. But we're gonna read it together.
Matthew six fourteen through 15. It says, if you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your father will not forgive your sins. See, in this entire chapter, Jesus is admonishing us to live out a real faith. He's saying, don't give like the hypocrites do.
Don't pray like the hypocrites do. Don't fast like the hypocrites do. Don't forgive like the hypocrites do. Forgive like this. Yes.
Yes. Thank you. Forgive like this. The world has all all sorts of theories about this. Right?
Restorative justice theory say, well, when you get around to it or it's not even really expected, you don't have to expect forgiveness. There's theories about reducing rage. Cognitive behavioral theory says, you know, when you just think your way into it, then maybe you can forgive someone. But overall, all these theories, when the they say when the emotional or the relational or the personal benefit outweighs the pain, then you can forgive. So when it personally benefits you or when emotionally it benefits you or when it outweighs the pain of what they did, then you can forgive.
But I promise you, Jesus doesn't give us that option. Come on. Jesus doesn't give us that option. We are called to forgive. Here's our first point.
What I have freely received, I am called to give. What I have freely received, I am called to give. Yes. Yes. We're gonna go to Matthew chapter 18, and we're gonna pick up in verse 28.
But Jesus gives us a parable that so beautifully depicts this concept of what I am called what I have freely received, I am called to give. This parable is called the the parable of the unforgiving debtor. It's like when you go to Disneyland, you know, if you go to Disneyland, Disneyland has the best churros, of course. Right? And your child asks you to buy them a churro, and you're like, of course.
Right? But then you're like, mom tax. Right? Like, I get a bite. Right?
Or if you get fries and then you pull some out the fries, that's mom tax. Right? You get a bite of the fries or whatever. I went we were at Disneyland the other day, bought my daughter a churro. Can I have a bite of the churro?
Mom, I don't wanna give you a bite. What? Right? I just bought you the churro. Right?
Mom tax. I get a piece of the churro. Well, this is worse than that. This is worse than that. Worse than that.
See, Jesus kind of rotates through these teachings. So he's reiterating what is being said in in Matthew chapter six. And so in Matthew 18, there is a servant who owes this huge debt. Huge. He asked the master, please be patient with me and I will pay the entire debt.
And the master is not only patient, the bible says he actually has pity and chooses to forgive the entire debt. So he doesn't just say, oh, yeah. I'll be patient with you. He says, you know what? I will forgive the entire debt.
So we pick up in verse 28, and there's a quite a few verses here. So just stay with me, and we'll read through these. But when the man left the king, this man that had just been forgiven his entire debt. But when the man left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded instant payment.
His fellow servant fell down before him and begged for a little bit more time. Be patient with me, and I will pay it, he pleaded. But his creditor wouldn't wait. He had the man arrested and put in prison until the debt could be paid in full. When some of the other servants saw this, they were very upset.
They went to the king and told him everything that had happened. Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, you evil servant. I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn't you have mercy on your fellow servant just as I had mercy on you? Yes.
Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he had paid the entire debt. That's oh, this one's heavy. Oh, this one's heavy. That's what my heavenly father will do to you if you refuse. Everybody say refuse.
If you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart. Forgiven people forgive. That's right. I'm a say it again. Forgiven people forgive.
If we truly believe the gospel that a loving father sent his one and only son to pay for our sins. And when we repent, he chooses to forgive us all of our sins, but then we refuse to forgive other people, we gotta check our heart. We gotta check our faith. Do you believe the gospel? This is the foundation of our faith, a God who loves and a God who forgives.
Morgan Teruel: Yeah. Thank you, Lord.
Donna Martin: We we gotta check our heart. We refuse. If my kids say, mom, I don't really wanna do it or I'm so tired or something, I'm like, oh, no. Go get it done. But there I ref what?
You refuse? That that's another story. We're having a problem. Right? You don't you don't get to refuse.
Come on. Doesn't matter how you feel. Do we believe the gospel? This is the foundation. I mean, is it.
I mean, I almost named this sermon. This is it. Like, this is there's nothing else. He forgave us. And forgiven people forgive.
If we look at this passage that we just read again, the consequences for the person who refused to forgive were worse than the consequences that he tried to inflict on the other guy. He was like, you know, he was gonna go to jail. He says, okay, well, I'll just go to jail. But he said, no, I'm gonna forgive the entire debt. But with this guy, he says, no.
You have to pay the entire debt. And the master goes, not only do you go to jail, you are gonna be tortured. Yeah. That's right. The consequences were worse when he refused to forgive.
Why? James two thirteen says this, for judgment is without mercy to the one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment. Mercy triumphs over judgment. See, this is not always modeled for us.
Our natural inclination come on. It's an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. You did me dirty, I'm a do you dirty, girl. Jesus comes and flips all that. He shows us how to live, how to forgive.
And our goal is not to model the world. But we get forgive when we feel like it, or if we feel like it, or when we get around to it, or we refuse. Absolutely not. Our goal, the Holy Spirit's goal is to make us just like Jesus. Yes.
Just like Jesus. So how do I forgive? How do I forgive? You gotta get real. Get real.
Don't stuff it, confess it, and confront it. Pull the nasty bananas out of your backpack. Give them to Jesus and say, this hurt. And I've let it sit in my heart for too long. Don't stuff it.
Don't just be like, oh, I'm a Christian. I forgave. I forgave. I forgave. And you actually like, you a lie.
You did not. Right? It's in there. There's bananas. Right?
And they're gross. Don't stuff it. Confess it and confront it. Hebrews twelve fifteen says this, look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.
The root of bitterness that can get in our heart, you think it just affects you. It doesn't. It doesn't. It grows up and it affects everyone around you. Hey, mama.
Your children need a free woman.
Morgan Teruel: Come on. Come on. On. Come on. Yes.
A
Donna Martin: woman who is not chained to the past, who hasn't allowed a root of bitterness to grow deep into her heart because the bible said when that thing grows up, it is gonna affect everybody.
Morgan Teruel: Yeah. Yeah. That's right.
Donna Martin: God is not asking us to pretend that things didn't hurt. He is not asking you to pretend. Get real. Tell him about it. Give it to Jesus.
Give it to him. Confess it. This hurt me.
Morgan Teruel: Yes. Why
Donna Martin: did you let this happen, God? Yes. Why did I walk through this, Jesus? Oh, but I know you can heal it. So how do we forgive?
We get real. The second thing we do, we choose quickly, quickly to forgive. You choose, and you choose quickly. Decide. Decide.
Decide. You are gonna choose obedience over rebellion. Right. Right. Yeah.
This is not an option. Yes. Yes. Yes. Your emotions are gonna fight you on this, But we choose.
Uh-huh. We make all sorts of choices. We do all sorts of things that we don't like. When I go to the gym, he says lift that. I'm like, I don't want to.
But I've made a choice. When I walked in there, I walked in there to not be the same. To listen to whatever he's telling me to do. And as a believer in Jesus, you don't get to do life how you wanna do it. What does he say?
He says, forgive. And so we choose and we choose quickly.
Morgan Teruel: Yes. Amen. Yes.
Donna Martin: We live and walk by faith, not by sight or feelings or emotions. Yeah. Yeah. We make all sorts of decisions outside of our emotions. Forgiveness is another one.
Yes. Choose. We choose to forgive. Make the choice. Decide.
I'm gonna forgive. And we pray. We pray. Matthew five forty four says this in the New King James. It says, but I say to you, love your enemies.
Bless those who curse you. Do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you. This is hard. Yes. It's truth.
Pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you. You're gonna pray until your feelings match your faith. Come on. Yeah. Just keep praying.
It's not gonna feel good. You're gonna pray through gritted teeth. You're gonna pray with clenched fist. You're gonna pray and go, I just don't kill them today, Jesus. Right?
You're gonna pray something. It's gonna be a hot mess, but you're gonna pray until your feelings match your faith. For a season, it might be a 70 times seven prayer over and over and over, forgiving them every single day. Jesus talks about Matthew eighteen twenty one right at the beginning of that passage we read. Peter is like, well, how many times do I forgive?
Seven times. And I'm sure Jesus was like, I forgave you seven times on the way you know what I'm saying? Like, on the way here. Jesus says, no. 70 times seven perfectly over and over and over and over over and over and over if you have to.
Yep. Amen. For a season, it might be a 70 times seven, like, prayer. Lord, I forgive him. Lord Jesus, I forgive him.
Right? But you can't do this without the holy spirit.
Morgan Teruel: That's right. Come on. Yes.
Donna Martin: You have to pray because you need the holy spirit's help to do this. This is not human nature. This is not natural. It is supernatural. It is supernatural to be able to forgive the person that hurt you the most.
Pray. You know, there was a season in my life I started having panic attacks. And it was about six years ago, and they were awful. If you ever suffered a panic attack, you're like, why is this happening? What is happening?
Right? Why is like, you feel like your body is betraying you. Yes. Feel like your body is betraying you. And I started suffering severe, severe panic attacks mixed with claustrophobia.
So I couldn't stand in my closet and pick out clothes for a period of time. I couldn't drive in my car, without having one hand out the window or having all the windows down. Couldn't get on rides with my kids, without my body just absolutely going into a panic of terror, and it was awful. I couldn't go through, for sure, like, tried to take my car through the car wash. No.
Right? Like, I just my body could not handle it. And the only thing really that got me through that season besides prayer, my husband, walking the floor, you know, quoting Psalm 23, that is how that's how I got through it. And, you know, after a a season you know, even I would fall asleep. And when I would fall asleep, I would see a plain door close.
I know this is stay with me. Right? Because stay with me. Kinda weird. I would see a plain door close in my like, right as I was trying to fall asleep, and it would throw my body into a panic.
Almost like you're I didn't have any trips coming up. I wasn't going anywhere, but the thought of a plain door closing would throw me into a panic. And I would get up out of my sleep and just be he you know, heezing, that's not the word, wheezing and heaving and all of these things. Right? And finally, I asked the Lord.
Should've did that on day one. Right? So what is going on with me? What is going on with me? Holy Spirit.
He began to show me some roots of bitterness in my life. And how those things had taken root, and they were not just affecting me mentally and spiritually, they were starting to affect my physical body. It was manifesting in my physical body. And so he took me through a series of people that I needed to really forgive and let go. Again, I had done like the, I forgive, I forgive.
I just stuffed it pretended, I'm forgiving. Series of people that I needed to forgive. And one by one, I chose to let go. So why do I forgive? My whole life and maybe even eternity are at risk if I don't forgive.
My whole life and maybe even eternity is at risk if I choose not to forgive. Matthew eighteen thirty four, again, the angry the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he paid his entire debt.
Morgan Teruel: Say it. That's right. When
Donna Martin: you choose not to forgive, when you refuse, you are turned over to the tormentors, Jesus said. Tormentors, tormenting your mind, your spirit, your emotions. It locks you up. It jails you. It keeps you in prison.
I believe you even open yourself up to demonic torment in your life when you refuse to forgive. And if you have a relationship with the Holy Spirit, which I know you do, he will poke at these things in your life.
Morgan Teruel: Thank you, Holy Spirit.
Donna Martin: He will poke at it. He doesn't allow things to just linger in your heart. Thank you. The Holy Spirit will start poking. Hey.
What about this? He'll poke at it. Yeah. He'll bring it to the surface. See, I believe even now, through this sermon, some of you are thinking of someone.
Where the Holy Spirit is highlighting someone or something or a situation. And we're like, no. Not that. Not them. Right?
Not that situation. I don't wanna have to forgive that. I don't wanna have to forgive them. They are not worthy of forgiveness. Who is worthy?
Who is worthy? As I was preparing for this sermon, I was walking in my neighborhood and praying like I normally do, and I kept hearing the phrase over and over, who is worthy? And I knew that I was gonna be talking about forgiveness, and I'm like, I don't know. You know? Like, you think of, like, the most heinous crime that someone could ever commit.
You know, the most heinous things in the world, and we're like, not. You know, like, they're not worth who is and I kept hearing it over and over and over. Who is worthy? And the Holy Spirit finally brought me back. It's like, stop thinking about all these crimes, these people, these situations, these things.
See, we like to pick and choose who we think is worthy of forgiveness. They may not be worthy, but he is.
Morgan Teruel: Jesus is a match. Come on. That's right. Thank you.
Donna Martin: They may not be worthy, but he is. He is worthy of your obedience. He is worthy of your obedience. I told you at the beginning of this message that my my dad called me on New Year's Day, and I had to make a choice. I had to choose something that I've chosen 70 times 70 times 70 times again.
I had to choose to forgive. Yes. And I picked up the phone and said, hey, dad. How you doing? Happy New Year.
Yes. He is worthy.
Morgan Teruel: Yes. Is Amen.
Donna Martin: Yes. I promise you this, that you will not look in the eyes of your beautiful savior and say what they did is bigger than what you did. You won't do it. You won't do it. You will not look in the eyes of Jesus and say what they did is bigger than what you did, Lord.
We have to have an eternal perspective. A thousand years from now, we are gonna be worshiping Jesus and it won't matter a hill of beans what they did. He's worthy. He is worthy. Yes.
He is. He is worthy.
Morgan Teruel: Amen. Yes, Lord.
Donna Martin: Of our obedience. Yes. That's right. He is worthy. Yes.
To say, if you say so, I'll do it. I don't know how I'm gonna do it. I don't know how I'm gonna get over the emotion of it. But Jesus, you are worthy.
Morgan Teruel: So worthy. Yes. Yeah. Thanks.
Donna Martin: It's not about them.
Morgan Teruel: Yes.
Donna Martin: It's about him. We have to pray your kingdom come.
Morgan Teruel: That's right.
Donna Martin: Your will be done now just like it is in heaven.
Morgan Teruel: Yes.
Donna Martin: If it won't matter then, God help it not to matter now. God, if I'll be worshiping then, help me to worship now. Let's pray. Let's pray. Jesus, I pray healing over your people, God.
And as we choose Jesus to set others free, I pray that those who have been in emotional and mental and physical torment, I pray that you set them free, Lord. I pray for chains of the past to be broken. I pray for deliverance over your people, God. I pray Holy Spirit that we would set it down. Whatever it is, we would set it down.
We would let it go. We would lay it at your feet, not because they are worthy, God, but because Jesus is worthy. He is worthy of our of our obedience. He is worthy of our worship. He is worthy of our obedience to his word.
And so, God, we let it go. Lord, I pray that the chains of the past be broken off of your people. God, I pray that they would have a new perspective, that they would embrace your love and your forgiveness, and that they would extend that to everyone around them, father. Oh, where it hurts, Jesus, heal them. You promise to be near to those who are brokenhearted.
So we give it to you. In Jesus' name. Amen. Amen. Sandals Church.
Amen.
Morgan Teruel: Thank you so much for tuning in today. If you want more content from this series, we have the YouTube playlist linked in the description. And if you want more information about who we are and what we do, you can go to sandalschurch.com.