{ "version": "1.0.0", "segments": [ { "speaker": "Speaker 1", "startTime": "17.105", "endTime": "21.425", "body": "Truth and Conversation, a podcast with Gary John Bishop." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "27.06", "endTime": "59.35", "body": "The structure of this show is a very simple one. I take questions from the listeners and I unpack the questions inside a very kind of specific philosophical outlook. I should add though that this isn't necessarily a philosophy program. If you're any philosophy you'll think it is a philosophy program. If you're not any philosophy it'll sound like we're just dealing with people's real lives and that's kind of the whole point." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "60.23", "endTime": "139.755", "body": "So I picked a question this week that I received a few days ago and it struck me as a really interesting thing that I suspect many of you are dealing with and he asked this person's name was Philippe and he said I sometimes catch myself losing my footing, getting swept up by my own internal agitation and emotions or getting paralyzed by fear and anxiety. Intellectual knowing doesn't give me the ability to change it and then so he had a question that arose out of that statement and he said how do I develop inner strength or put another way how do I finally become ready? Which I suspect is his real question. And I do think it's a great question but I don't think it goes all the way in enough. One of the one of the things that I talk about a lot in all of my books is the more you focus on what you think is wrong, the more you'll be in it." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "140.69", "endTime": "170.1", "body": "So the more you try and fix, the more you're left with what's broken. So if I'm feeling agitated or fearful or anxious, You have to understand what makes me interact with that to try and get rid of it is this idea that I shouldn't be this way. I'm not supposed to be this way. I'm supposed to be different. I don't like this way." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "171.37999", "endTime": "183.10501", "body": "Let me change it. Let me meditate. Let me think. Let me read. Let me, you know, whatever one might do to attempt to handle it." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "184.065", "endTime": "215.095", "body": "But what you end up doing is jumping any bed with it. So it's an experience that you're having And the more one desires to change that experience, the more you're doubling, tripling, quadrupling down on it. So that's number one. But I think there's a really important aspect what Philippe was talking about here for all of us. And that's this whole kind of conundrum of being ready." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "216.135", "endTime": "255.79001", "body": "Right? Like I can't do anything until I get rid of this feeling. I can't do anything until I feel ready enough, confident enough, strong enough, certain enough. And it's not just the feelings, it's the circumstances. Until I get enough money, until I move out of this place, until I move in at my new place, until I get that new job, until I until I until I and so you wait but but you're you're not waiting on anything specific outside of your feelings and one or two things external to you that you think need to change so that you can." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "256.83002", "endTime": "275.785", "body": "But I think the most important one that we often miss is that our feelings eventually become permission. Right? So I feel anxious. I don't feel confident. Those experiences quietly become permission slips." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "277.08", "endTime": "313.82", "body": "I don't feel ready, therefore I shouldn't. Right? And I don't feel the way that I think I should be feeling. So without without ever even noticing it, your emotional life, that is to say your internal state, becomes the authority on the direction of your life. And that in itself is a trap because it takes you down a pathway because now you're trying to solve the problem." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "314.54", "endTime": "330.375", "body": "Now you're trying to freaking you know work on yourself. Get yourself another couple of books. Dive in there. Surely there's a chapter in here that's gonna save me from this bullshit. More podcasts like this one." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "330.375", "endTime": "337.71002", "body": "A few techniques. Right? You know how I love the techniques. Three steps to not being an asshole. Let me try that." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "339.63", "endTime": "359.97", "body": "But every attempt begins with the same assumption. Starts with the same idea. I'm this way. I don't like that I'm this way. I should be a different way and therefore whatever future I have in mind for myself I'm not ready for that yet." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "360.21", "endTime": "383.995", "body": "I'm not equipped for what's next. I don't have what these other people have. They all look like they're shits together. They all look like they're freaking awesome. But here am I wrestling with myself wrapped up in myself gouging at my belly button looking for more fluff." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "385.63998", "endTime": "422.36", "body": "So every attempt, every self indulgence reinforces that identity of being someone who isn't the someone that you think you should be. And just just kind of let yourself get exposed to the magnitude of that, like what that does to a person. Where it leads you. I mean it's little wonder of your lesson to me to ask you, you know, what the hell are you doing? And of course this isn't just for Philippe, this is for everybody." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "423.71997", "endTime": "472.45", "body": "Wrapped up in yourself, indulging yourself, fascinated by yourself, your fucking nuances and your, you know, categories that you belong to and your identity factors and behavioral shifts and I mean come on. This fascination for self examination and the vain hope that it will somehow free you up but you don't realize you're just digging a deeper hole for yourself. It's that indulgence with self that keeps you trapped not the thing that you think that's wrong. It's not the anxiety that keeps you trapped. It's the idea that you shouldn't be anxious that keeps you trapped." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "473.65002", "endTime": "508.05002", "body": "It's not fear that keeps you trapped, it's the idea that you should somehow not be fearful, that you should be confident or assertive or find your fucking voice or whatever you want to call it. That's what keeps you trapped. The you that you're not. And so you know, look, let me let me lay something out for you here. Readiness isn't a feeling." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "509.41", "endTime": "537.66003", "body": "Being ready to go do the next thing, go to the meeting, ask for the raise, ask the person, tell the person you want to split up, move, stay, elevate, whatever you want to do with your life maybe it isn't emotional. What if it's not confidence? What if it's got nothing to do with certainty? Like a feeling like oh yeah this is my time. I mean do you know how many people are waiting for their time?" }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "539.855", "endTime": "587.87006", "body": "Maybe being ready isn't something you experience before life. Maybe it's something that life reveals to you after you've started to take the actions. You see, to really be someone who's willing to go beyond the constraints of this bag of skin and bones, you'd have to stop negotiating with your feelings. I mean don't get me wrong, fear speaks, uncertainty speaks, anxiety speaks. Fine, it's okay." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "588.59", "endTime": "624.92", "body": "They get a voice, you can let them have their say but here's the kicker, they don't get a vote. The mistake isn't fear. What's holding you back isn't anxiety. The error on your part is asking the fear or the anxiety for permission to do whatever it is you want to do with your life. In fact the truth be told, whatever great things you want to do with your life you'll have to take these feelings with you, you don't have to become someone else." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "625.225", "endTime": "664.575", "body": "In fact, if you start to set out for yourself these are the actions I'm committed to, these are the things I'm up to in my life and you took those actions in the face of your fear, the face of your no confidence, anxiety, whatever it is, you're already being someone else. You're already being that freaking person. You're just taking the feelings along for the ride. I've said this many times, I've said it in multiple books, your feelings are important. You should notice them, you should take stock, you should acknowledge what's there." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "665.79", "endTime": "670.83", "body": "Right? Acknowledge it out loud. I'm feeling afraid. I'm feeling anxious. Okay." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "671.07", "endTime": "679.23", "body": "I'm not asking you to do it with them. Just asking you to acknowledge it. Give it the nod. I see you. I got you." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "680.465", "endTime": "711.32", "body": "And then you act. You see, maybe the biggest tragedy in all of this isn't that we're afraid. It's that we've mistaken fear for instruction. That we have postponed our lives waiting for an experience that we never needed in the first place. I'm gonna hear you a quote from Kierkegaard." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "713.60504", "endTime": "761.41003", "body": "He said, to dare is to lose one's footing momentarily. Not to dare is to lose oneself. So what if losing your footing isn't the problem at all, but rather refusing to risk it. Readiness, being ready, it's one of the greatest fucking myths we've ever invented. And I'll tell you right now, this industry, the personal growth and development industry thrives on your sitting on the fence with that." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "763.33", "endTime": "807.875", "body": "You don't feel your way into a new a new life. You step into it. You'll have to take the feelings along with you and it's okay and the more you do it the more you realize like hey this is less of an inhibitor than I ever thought it was. And again you know I've spent a lot of time here talking about feelings but it includes stuff like your circumstances, waiting on that to change, looking to them for permission to be someone, to step up because you're not what's in your head, you are what you do. I wrote a book about that in case you missed it." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "812.84", "endTime": "875.55005", "body": "So you know there's there's nothing for you to wait on and everything at stake and every moment of every day is an opportunity for you to step out there and lose your footing momentarily or to lose yourself in the mundane of what you always do. Now if you haven't caught up enough with me, I would invite you to go to the website garyjohnbishop.com. There you'll find out about lots of different things. The books of course, right, and if you haven't read all the books, you should read all the books, right, and they'll put you in a they'll put you into this mentality. In fact the people that email me the most with results I've produced have read multiple books, not like one and done, but read multiple books, and they've made the connections between the philosophy that's at play there." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "877.07", "endTime": "901.25", "body": "So you'll find out about the books. You'll find out about the podcast. You'll find out about the old podcast, by the way, which has a 150 something episodes and is still listenable on Fuck Nation. You can find out about our new retreat that's coming up next month on the August 21. We've still got a few spots there, so you can find out about that on the website, garyjohnbishop.com." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "901.73", "endTime": "954.89", "body": "You can get more information, and you can actually register for it right there. I'll be sending out some blasts from that retreat next month to give you a little sense of what the people there are gonna be doing, But it'll be a Truth and Conversations, three and a half days, twenty something hours together, evenings by the fireside, talking about life and love and philosophy. And then also, look, I know you're listening to this podcast. You might not have subscribed yet. I really want this podcast to do great things, but it's important for it to do great things that you demonstrate that it's something you're interested in being a part of either just as a listener or maybe you've got a question or a conundrum for me." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "955.45", "endTime": "998.045", "body": "But as a listener, I invite you to to to subscribe to the podcast, wherever you're getting your podcast, but also to write us. You know, if you can give us a few stars, that would be amazing. It makes a massive difference in the podcast. And then I think probably one of the most important things here, if you have something in your life that you feel as if you're stuck with, something in your life that you feel as if you can't get past or that you need some insight into and you'd like to have it unpacked on the show, then email me connect at gary john bishop dot com. Connect at gary john bishop dot com." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "998.285", "endTime": "1027.365", "body": "Let me hear what's going on in your life, And who knows? Like Philippe, for this week, maybe I'll use it. Right? And we'll use it to unpack it for the entire audience and the people who are interested in expanding their sense of self and transforming the way that they live. And if you'd like your question or your conundrum or whatever you're dealing with to remain anonymous, then you should include that in the email and I'll I'll I'll make sure that that's taken care of." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 2", "startTime": "1028.63", "endTime": "1039.5901", "body": "Well, that's it for this week's episode. Look out for the next one, but don't forget, like, subscribe and share the podcast. Have a great one." }, { "speaker": "Speaker 1", "startTime": "1044.055", "endTime": "1053.8151", "body": "Every episode starts somewhere. Maybe the next one starts with you. Email us at connect@GaryJohnBishop.com. Until next time. Thanks for listening." } ] }