Like, were they really eating cake really loud or.
Oh, no, no. I don't know.
I couldn't possibly hear.
This Cake is so good.
Ra ra, ra.
Hey, maniac.
Hey, Maniac.
Oh, my gosh. It's been way too long.
And it's been a million years.
Or three. Weeks or three. Weeks. Yes.
Hope you all had an awesome Halloween. Yes.
And wherever you live, fall is dawning.
And it's beautiful colors.
I'm looking out the window right now
and it's like orange and yellow, and it's gorgeous.
I don't know how people live somewhere with no seasons.
Fall is the best.
It was awesome.
It is the best.
You know who else is the best? Who? Our listeners.
Our listeners are the best.
That thread about the fame.
Their favorite quotes from the podcast on subreddit.
Yeah, on the subreddit. Look at it.
Oh. It's so awesome. We'll get there.
But first, Mystery Maniacs is a comedy
Recap podcast dedicated to mystery TV.
Each week we dig into an episode of a show,
including the murders, the mayhem, the loonies, and everything else we love.
This week, we're covering Father Brown.
Season one Episode to the Flying Start.
I'm Sarah. And I'm Mark.
And we realize that some of you hopefully some of you are brand new.
And you're here because you love Father Brown. Yes.
We also love Father Brown.
And we welcome you to the Maniac Pack.
So we want to call.
The Maniac. Maniacs. Yes.
So just to prepare you, we're covering all of season one of Father
Brown episode by episode.
And we will spoil it.
We will assume that you have seen the episode and are here to talk about it
so you know who did it.
We're going to ruin it for you if you haven't watched it.
So if you have not seen the Flying Starz, stop or watch it come back.
And if your kids watch the show with you, they can listen to the podcast.
Absolutely.
We let the show decide how rude or not rude we'll be.
Yes, and we're not that we love the show.
So, yeah.
We're not we're not criticizing.
It or curtsy.
So what? We're not crude.
Yes. Well, mystery mostly.
Yes. Everyone's we're mystery maniacs, but we started out as Midsomer Maniacs
because we covered the entirety of 22 seasons.
Of Midsomer.
Murders of 135 episodes.
And when the new season comes out, we cover it.
And there's going to be a new season.
Folks.
We know for sure. For sure.
Then we cover two seasons of Murdoch mysteries, a Canadian show.
And now we're moving on to Father Brown.
And we've dipped into Poro and Jonathan Creek and lots of other shows.
So enjoy.
You have 200 plus episodes to listen to if you're just now discovering the show
because of Father Brown.
Apparently were funny.
There's a whole thread on this subreddit about it.
Yeah.
About their favorite quotes
from us, from our episodes, including ones that I've forgotten.
I've said.
So this is how this is how our social media works.
I do all our social media and read it to Sarah.
Not because I'm against social media.
I don't have the kind of job where I have some time during the day to look now.
And Mark does.
I read out the quotes from the thread on Reddit
and we were both like, I don't remember what.
I don't remember.
We have we have hundreds of hours of material we've covered.
I'm like, Boy, that sounds funny.
And one of them I was like, Yeah, that's a me thing to say.
But I don't. Remember. Saying or saying it.
But it's, it's, it's kind of a nice walk down memory lane to remind ourselves of.
Oh, yeah. I remember that.
That was fun when we said that.
And so it's a. Funny. Episode today.
We're covering episode two.
Next week we will cover
episode three the week after episode four, and then the week we're.
Going to do them in order.
Episode five were going in order and all that crap.
Well, you're just crazy jazz.
Business, so you can find Father Brown most easily on.
Britbox.
Britbox in America and the BBC
iPlayer iPlayer app in the UK.
Yeah, and wherever you are outside of those areas, we can't tell you where
to find it because all the platforms are notoriously bad at sharing
what they show in other areas of the world.
Like you cannot find a listing of what is available in the UK on Prime.
Know.
It and we've asked them directly, Can you give us a list?
I tried to find the main offices of these companies. Yes.
And we.
Tried to contact Netflix and ACORN and Britbox and.
They said. They just won't tell you now.
So if you have trouble finding it, reach out maybe on the subreddit
and you know, maybe a fellow person from your part of the world can.
Tell you, like I know it's on Britbox in Canada too.
But best because you have family in Canada and you've asked them
and they've told you Britbox wouldn't tell you. Yes.
So just a couple of things like that off the top.
I'm Canadian, Sarah's American.
We live in the United States and we do not take ads
or sponsorships through the podcast.
We do not raise any money from the podcast and we do not charge
any money from the podcast. We do sell merchandise.
We do sell merchant, and.
All the proceeds go to charity and we even match.
We even match it out of our own pockets.
And right now we're raising money for a maternity hospital in Africa.
Yes, if you're interested in some merch, it's in the show notes,
but that's the only time you're going to hear from us, though
I did notice it's now appearing on YouTube now.
Great.
So I think that's fantastic.
Okay, now housekeeping.
Let's get down to. The home shopping done. Let's get to the fun stuff.
This episode was originally aired
the 15th of January 2013, which is just like 5 minutes ago.
We were in this house already then directed by Ian
Barbour and written by Rachel Flower Day.
It's still under the name Flower Day. Flower Day.
It's still in the before times, though it is to me.
Everything is pre or post COVID.
It's still there before our time.
Speaking of those some interesting.
Episodes.
Wow, we got some things wrong about COVID on that first episode.
Oh boy.
We will be. All back to normal in two weeks.
No, nobody knew anyhow.
Okay, so this starts with what we call a cold open,
which is Father Brown and Mrs.
McCarthy walking across the field.
I'm going to call her Mrs. M. Mrs.
M because that's what everybody calls her, especially Sid said, who said,
oh, we'll. We'll get there.
As I have mentioned, when we have covered Father Brown before,
these are the episodes where I don't like Mrs.
M Yeah, because she's judgy
and snobby and mean type.
And we even asked Jude Tindle, the writer of some of these episodes, about that.
Yeah, she gets so much better.
And later she made Murmur and they made a.
Conscious decision to make her the voice of the fifties
in the first couple of episodes.
And she is. And she is.
But then they made another conscious decision to tone her down.
Who wants to have dinner with working people?
Oh, wow.
Okay, so knob tastic knob.
I'm like, What are you?
But Father Brown is consistent.
He is always friendly, more eager to speak his mind.
Your requests to make people question, you know, what they're thinking the.
Most on Catholic priest of Catholic priest.
Yes. I immediately am amazed in this episode
and how many women walk in heels and grass.
It is so difficult to do
even if you don't wear like a stiletto heel, you wear like a wedge heel.
Yeah, they still sink. Yeah.
Like I sympathize
with her complaining about walking through the paddock up to the house.
Yeah.
Rather than on the road because she's wearing pumps
and her feet are probably sinking into the ground.
Father Brown offers to give her a piggyback.
I think that she should have said yes,
that would have been hilarious or the other way around.
She could have ridden on his back. That would have been even funnier.
And he has a plot hole in his cassock.
I mean. A hole.
In his.
Pocket. In his pocket.
This is an indication of how cheap Mrs.
M is.
Yeah, she has brought a purse full of foreign currency that somebody
has put in the collection box, hoping that the kernel will change it for her.
Yes, because he travels. Yeah.
So he might just, you know, be willing to buy lira off of her.
Whatever. Well, now she's saving the lira.
That's going to Rome. Yeah, but.
And I understand it's not for her pocket, it's for the church.
She wants the church to get as much money as they can.
But somebody put a button in.
Yeah. When she gets sick, she's going to put them on her.
Cardi, You know, as I was an Anglican altar boy,
which is somewhat unbelievable, and one of the things I did was do
the collection plates during the
the church service and then I would go through them at the end.
And there are a number of times where there were empty envelopes.
Yeah.
People just put an envelope in because they didn't
want other people to see them not put something in.
Yeah, that's kind of sad though.
It, it's both like.
Especially since you're in church and you're not supposed to be judging people.
Yeah, like, come on.
It's kind of like there are two kinds of people who do that.
The people who have no money and don't want to want to save some face.
And then the other kind of people who don't care.
Yeah. Or just like, have your envelope back.
Yeah, I don't want it.
This relationship between Mrs.
M and Father Brown is it's so well-written.
Even in these early episodes, when I think the writing could be improved,
they have the relationship down between them because as nasty as Mrs.
M can be, Father Brown is consistently not. Yes.
And he doesn't snipe at her when she's nasty.
He just gently suggests the right way to think. Yes.
And he does it throughout this whole episode and I love it.
And her face sort of.
Cusack is such a great actress.
Her she she does this thing where she, like, pulls her chin back like a turtle.
Like, yeah, like, well, that's me told you know it that.
You have to kind of watch her face.
Yeah she does great reaction.
She does a lot of acting That's not voice acting.
So we get to the Adams House.
Yes. Right now.
So it's the Addams Family? No,
that would be a completely different.
I would say it's the Addams Family.
No. No.
If it was Morticia floating in the pond, they'd be completely different.
The daughter was be was Wednesday.
It was.
It all came together in my head.
And then I was.
Like, No, no, it's not like not that Addams Family.
It's a holdover from Halloween.
Yeah, I think you're having flashbacks.
The house where the Addams Live and reality is called Warmington Grange.
Yes, Warmington is such a weird name.
So for new folks listening, this is the maniacal information
that you're going to get from us in the episode.
Not only do we discuss the episode, we discuss all things about the episode.
Oh, and this house is incredible.
It is incredible.
So we're going to post a couple of links with this show.
One of them is that Warmington Grange.
It was owned by a family.
Several families owned it over the long period.
Was it a. Peculiar American family? No,
they weren't in black and white or anything.
But then in in I think it was 2025, I remember.
Right.
It was handed over to the UK heritage.
Yes, I. Right.
So they maintain these old estates. Yes.
And when that happened they sold off the contents of the house.
Yeah.
And the auction company that handled that auction is called Dukes
and they still have the website up from the sale.
So anything you see in the background here, there's a possibility
you can go see what it is exactly and how much it sold.
And I never had to spend so much time.
Were there so many episodes were like, what is that thing behind them?
Well, and so often pretty much everything.
An asset has been put there by a set dresser. Yes.
But in this case, Warmington Grange was furnished.
Yeah. Like the cushions on the couch.
When the colonel sits down are the cushions that were in the house.
You can see them.
So Dukes did this amazing thing where they did this.
It's called a Matterport scan, and it's like a 360 scan of every room
and every piece of the furnishings that was going to be sold
has a little dot over it.
And you can hover and you can click it
and it will give you all the information about what that object is.
Selling. And how much it's sold for.
And it's so up you can like crawl, basically crawl around the house
looking at. All this stuff.
I was in like half a room and I was like, Oh, no, I.
I don't have time to spend. All day here.
So we're going to post that link.
But the most interesting thing I found, it's
not something we get to see in the episode, unfortunately.
So there's a blog called Melody's Boudoir.
Okay. Dot Net.
And this this woman who writes this blog,
she visits a lot of the heritage
sites in the UK as a hobby. Yes.
And she went to Warmington Grange before it was sold and contents were gone.
And one of the photos on this post
includes the most amazing fact.
Okay.
So there's a bathroom.
Obviously, there's a bathroom in the house.
There's several bathrooms.
In the. House. Whoa. I know.
But the tour guide told them that Churchill had used this bathroom.
Okay, so that is a toilet that Churchill once sat on.
Okay.
But over to the side, there are two chairs in the bathroom.
Okay. Very nice chairs. Okay.
And they are the chairs and you can see it embroidered on them.
Is an e r, okay.
They are the chairs that the I want to say that
they're they were a duke and duchess who owned the house.
They went to Elizabeth the seconds coronation.
Okay.
And those are the chairs they sat in at the coronation. Wow.
And they are now at the time of the post in the back room.
Oh, wow.
Like there's a throne room and.
There's a throne room. I mean, fine.
That's just wrong.
Wow. They're like purple velvet with gold embroidery,
and they're just there next to the toilet.
It's so weird.
Wow. But you can see that photo.
We'll post a link to that, that blog entry to so you can check it out.
Absolutely.
But that Matterport scan is just incredible.
Like.
You can just. You you can look every direction.
You can see.
It's almost like being in VR, but things are clickable.
It's really. Cool.
Now, sir, I have a confession to make about this episode.
We watched these originally
when they came out on probably Britbox.
Yeah, when they were.
Prime when they were released.
We are excited about it.
We knew Father Brown was coming.
We knew Mark Williams was playing Father Brown.
We we were excited about this.
And so we watched them then and we've watched them probably
not as much as midsummer episodes, but I'd say we probably watched.
Three or four times, three. Or four times since then.
I had it in my head
that Mrs.
Adams. Anne Murray.
Was the killer.
Of call her and Patricia was the killer.
I was incorrect.
It's funny because when you watch this many episodes of Mystery shows,
sometimes you
you can cross them in your head if you haven't seen in a while or you've
seen the same actor in another show, and they're the killer in that show.
So when you see them play a different
role, you're like, Oh yeah, they're the killer.
I No, no, no.
They were the killer in that other show, not the show. Yes.
So you must have been utterly confused how this alcoholic evil woman manages
to kill people.
First of all, I was like, all every time somebody said over
my dead body, or I'll kill you for that, I was like, She's going to kill. You
know, It's like, you're wrong, wrong, wrong.
And then, second of all, we need to talk about their flagrant
alcoholism because there is a problem.
One of the things I do is find promo images from the show.
When I'm searching for images to use for social media for each of the episodes.
And there is one where she is sucking that bottle like, No, tomorrow.
Well, the colonel finds it in her dressing table
and she snags it from him and just finishes it standing in front of it.
Right. That's the picture I have.
And oh, I almost gagged watching that because I hate vodka so much.
To me, it tastes like rubbing alcohol. She does not.
And I can't imagine somebody just drinking it like that.
She she likes that vodka. But you know what?
Before he realizes that she's been drinking before,
he smelled it on her breath.
He really loves her.
I think that he is trying to save his house.
His daughter in his marriage all at the same time.
Yeah.
Though I do have a conspiracy theory later on that might not work with that.
I have one too.
So we also find out that Ruby, their daughter.
This is her birthday party?
Yes. That Mrs.
M and Father Brown
are slugging their way to that she's secretly engaged to her tutor.
So who is an American read?
Because it's my daughter's birthday party.
I'm going to release a new play because I'm a playwright. Wow.
I was maybe three episodes into watching this
before I realized, wait a minute, she's the playwright.
Three episodes in.
Three, three times watching this episode.
Before you realize that she's the one who wrote the play.
Yeah, that Emory wrote the play.
Yeah. It's not a very.
Good play, but I. Don't know what she was thinking.
Writing this play, It's like it's.
But it's almost like a psychic play.
Yeah, it is a bit of a psychic play.
It's like, this is how I'm going to die.
We're all to introduced to the other two female regular cast members.
First, the maid.
Susie.
Susie, who is now a maid. Yes.
Well, Susie does any job she can.
She does. She's a Polish immigrant.
And Lady Felicia.
She's a Polish refugee. Yes.
Yeah.
And Lady Felicia, who is just awesome.
Yeah, Nancy, Carol's just awesome net.
So, Lady Felicia is Ruby's godmother.
Yes. So we have to assume in the way Lady Felicia gets upset later
after Emory's dead, is that Anne Marie and Felicia were at one time
good friends, and that's why she's her godmother.
Godmother. And we will.
We'll I will also say that this is an actual G.K.
Chesterton story, but it's not anything like.
It's very, very different.
Yeah.
And they and when we talked to Jude Tindle,
she said they struggled
in the first season dealing with the source material.
Mm hmm. Yeah.
Okay, so let's. Talk about this birthday.
Okay? All right.
Because we have a mystery here to figure out.
Yeah.
Before Anne Marie is even killed. Yes.
So this is Ruby's birthday party?
Yes. And Ruby is young enough that she cannot marry her
red fiancee without her parent's permission.
But she's eligible to inherit. Yes.
So how old do you think Ruby is supposed to be?
I think based on this being in England, that she's implied to be 17 or 18.
Now, we know the actress is not 17 or 18.
At this time.
In the UK it was legal to be married at 16, but you had to have parental consent.
Okay, so we know that she's 16.
At least, at. Least.
Without parental consent.
How old do you think you needed to be at this time to get married?
So this is in 53.
The story.
The show is set. And now remember that G.K.
Chesterton stories are set much earlier, but this is 53
and I would say 417.
21. 21 Oh.
It is. The patriarchy strikes again.
The the legal age to get married without parental
consent now is 18 in the UK.
Okay. When do you think that changed?
By 21 to 18.
I bet that changed sometime in the seventies.
No, it changed seven months ago.
What, in February of 2023.
So if I'm 20 years old in England.
You need your parents consent.
You need your parent's consent to get married.
Wow. Yeah.
Was that was that the law in the books or was that the law in reality? Yes.
Oh, you couldn't get a marriage license without your parents signing it.
That's horrific.
If you weren't 21.
Like I always come back to the fact that as an older man,
the fact that a woman could not get a credit card in my lifetime.
Is that changed in your life.
Upsetting to. Me? Yeah.
That, like, my mom couldn't have got a credit card.
Yeah. So Ruby could be 20?
Yeah, it could be her 20th birthday, you know, Or it could be her 17th
birthday. We don't.
We don't know.
I don't know.
Yeah, but Father Brown says he's going to marry them anyway because.
He doesn't care.
I guess he's not beholden to the legal marriage.
He just is going to be a church marriage.
Oh. In the first episode, like, he was like, Oh, you're gay.
Okay, Yeah.
So, again, the most liberal of Catholic.
That's really anachronistic. Yeah.
So the party in the play are canceled because Anne-Marie is toasted.
Yeah.
So I'm like, Oh, yeah, she's dead and like.
Be aggressive, drunk to like yelling and stuff.
So when Mrs.
M and Father Brown show up, they hear Anne Marie yelling.
Yeah, right.
They get told that the party's canceled, but they don't know that
because they didn't come to the front gate to see the sign.
Yeah, and Lady Felicia says there's lots of cake in the kitchen.
Let's go.
So while they're in the kitchen eating cake and Marie is murdered.
Uncle Fester shows up and kills her.
While they're in the house. Yes.
She's killed in the pond?
Yes. Right next to the house?
Yeah.
It's a bit further from the house than you think it is, but yeah.
It's on the ground.
So within eyeshot, you can see the pond.
You can see the house from the pond.
Now, I'm sure all of us who have a pond on their ground.
Yes, all of us.
Yeah. Oh, we don't. No, we don't.
But yeah, that, that seems incredibly weird.
I have in my notes. Well, she's dead.
I guess I was wrong.
But I just
think Father Brown is the detective.
He's remarkably nearby when she's killed. So.
Like, why didn't
they hear them shouting on the dock if they were just in the kitchen cake?
Were they really eating cake really loud?
Oh, no, I don't know.
I'm not that couldn't possibly hear this cake is so good, right?
Oh, wow. Yeah.
Unless the cake the kitchen's like in the dungeon or something.
Because Emery was not in the reenactment.
We see.
She's not quiet on the door.
No, she's like.
I were telling her.
You know,
because she's an angry drunk.
But, man, is. She a good corpse. Oh, okay.
Face up in the water under the deck, eyes wide open.
And she was fantastic corpse.
Yeah. Does a really good job. She does a great job.
But you know who else does a great job?
Whoever caters the murder scene.
Because did you notice there's some cakes flat out left out the murder scene?
Just.
This is why I know I'm like no cop.
Even in the fifties, every cop is going to be like, nobody touches anything.
Well, Valentine doesn't even think there's been a crime.
He's like, It's an accident. Yeah, it's fine.
Her neck is scratched up from some weeds, like case closed, shut Done.
We got to tell you, if you're nude, Father Brown.
Well, first, where have you been?
But they're really trying to figure out Valentine in this episode.
He gets so much better.
He gets smarter.
Yeah.
In this episode, he's like, I'm just going to accuse everybody one at a time.
Let them prove their own innocence after I accuse them and just do it
by process of elimination.
I have no evidence against anybody.
Suddenly were at the church.
Yeah.
Did you notice how quickly we moved to the church?
Uh huh.
I think this is one of those places where there was
probably a seed introduction scene and we'll get to that later.
That got cut. Here.
Yeah.
And that's.
Why it seems awfully sudden where the church.
It had to have happened.
The scene where we were introduced to said that is not in the episode
must have happened at some point when Lady Felicia is somewhere
other than home because he drives her everywhere. Yes, he does.
And she's places other than home.
So he should be there having driven her there and we never see him.
And we meet Uncle Fester.
I mean. I got James.
Uncle James, how many episodes from episodes off the top of your head?
Can you list where there's a dead body being?
Because at first I thought this is a funeral,
but they find people in the churchyard who are bad people.
Yeah, yeah.
Who who.
Present themselves as long lost relatives or long lost friends
or something like Now.
Christie flips it because Marple is always in this position. Yes,
she's the creepy.
She's. Mrs. Marple.
Miss Marple.
Is the creep in the cemetery? Yeah.
I've at least three things. She's like that.
Yeah, but.
Lady Felicia is not always this horny.
Okay?
She is.
She's got to pick a Delos.
She sees him from across the cemetery.
She. She.
You can hardly see his face.
And she's like, Oh. Yeah, yeah.
I'm on to that one. Like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
And like, okay.
At this point, I know you can't even see his face.
We know that Monty is not here, but we don't know if.
Monty is her husband.
We don't know if Monty's in London for the day.
Yeah.
Or away for. Dinner or he's in Nairobi.
Well, she mentions them 30 seconds before she kisses James.
Yeah.
These are my husband's shoes.
More and one more.
And she's better than that.
Well, luckily, there isn't, like, a priest around to judge her.
Oh, well, Father Brown doesn't.
Judge her for incredible, blatant infidelities at all.
And then we get a clue that is a major,
super relevant clue that is just picked up and dropped.
Yes. Agnes Short, the nanny?
Yes. Dead? Yes. Fairly recently. Yes.
Oh, well, bye.
Okay. It's barely even talked about.
We get one tiny shot of her, the cross on her grave with her name on it.
We hardly talk about her and she's gone.
I'm sure that won't be relevant later on.
I'm American and I'm suddenly a boyfriend.
I'm John Van ERT.
Van Art.
Banter is not an American name of.
The Montana Manor.
He should be Dutch.
He does not have bad English accent yet bad Brit.
American. Accent.
Here he does do something that I do like
because I'm not a citizen of the United States, though I live here.
I'm a permanent resident.
That is in your mind when you.
I cannot get in trouble.
Yeah, I'm not a citizen. I'm not a. Citizen.
They could kick me out like America did because I'm a red.
Yeah.
This is. Back when we.
Just ejected people from the country.
So there there's a mention there.
Uncle James is from Kenya here.
And then.
His friend in Nairobi and.
Father Brown mentions Happy Valley.
White Place.
Happy Valley.
Okay, so I don't remember that.
In what context, as Father Brown mentioned, Happy Valley.
He said maybe he got tired of Happy Valley.
Is that in Kenya?
Yes. Okay.
Happy Valley is a place in Kenya where basically
in the twenties to the forties, if you wanted to do drugs,
be an alcoholic or a sexual deviant, that was the place to be.
So expats would go to Happy Valley, like Europeans would go there. Yes.
And there was something called the Happy Valley set,
which was a group of hedonistic, largely British aristocrats whose adventures
were settled in the Happy Valley region of the
when Joel Valley in Kenya.
Basically, it was a rich suburb
on another continent where you could do whatever you wanted.
Well, there's some stories there.
Oh, I'm going to tell you.
I'm just going to read one.
So wait a minute.
So before you tell me that story, so what Father Brown is saying
is, if he was in Kenya, maybe he was in this hedonistic place
having sex and drinking and doing drugs and got tired of it and came home. Yes.
That's almost rude.
It is. It is.
It is surprising.
Father Brown mentions it. Yeah.
Like that's the last place he should know much about anyway.
Okay, tell us the story, lady.
Anita Sackville. Okay. Okay.
A British arrest doctor,
daughter of the eighth Earl of War.
Dilawar, cousin of poet Vita Sackville-West.
Okay.
She divorced her first husband and then went to Kenya,
abandoned her second husband, then went to Kenya again,
and then met a man eight years and her junior and started sleeping with him.
She was essentially pioneered the decadent lifestyle in a Happy Valley
set, became notorious for hosting wild parties,
which included spouse swapping and drug use.
Stories are told of how she would often welcome guests in a bathtub
made of green onyx and then proceed to dress before them.
Wow. This is like 50 years before swinger parties and
she was.
Just.
Setting trends.
It was crazy.
Well, the twenties were pretty crazy.
Yeah, they call them the Roaring Twenties for a reason.
Yeah, but if you want to if you want to be enlightened to colonial
hedonism, Happy Valley Set Wikipedia page.
Yeah, we got in 30 years.
That's a long time.
Most people can't maintain that kind of lifestyle for 30 years.
Yeah, you get.
Broken or dead.
Within that time.
Yeah.
Remember when I said we had a mystery to solve?
Yeah.
How old Ruby was? Yes.
Here's the second part of the mystery. Okay.
So Jane shows up.
Yes. And the colonel doesn't say you're not James,
so I would assume he's never met James. Yes.
So James left before the colonel and Marie got married?
Yes. And he's been gone 20 years? Yes.
How old is Ruby again?
Oh. Well, she has to be under 20 then.
Mm hmm.
Or they're bad Catholics.
They're bad Catholics.
Like, maybe Ruby was born on the wrong side of the blanket.
Maybe it's like, was she conceived before they got married?
The math doesn't quite work, or the colonel just pays so little attention.
He was like, Yeah, I've met you before.
Whatever you ever dudes are dudes.
He's breathing.
You look like a brother to me.
Whatever. It's time for Father Brown. Mrs.
M, scene of the crime re creation.
Well, where he gets in the boat and is like rob.
One at our. Island, trying to fall out of the boat.
From start to finish in this entire show, but particularly in these episodes
at the beginning.
Mark Williams Charming.
This is always on display. Mm.
He's not Ron Weasley, he's dad,
you know, he's no the crazy camper from midsummer.
No, he's a different person.
But yeah.
He finds blood on the shore. Yep.
So we know she got hit by the OR.
Before this though.
There's the conversation, this rapid fire conversation between Ruby
and the Colonel and James in front of Father Brown and Mrs.
M where they say how Anne-Marie might have died. Yes.
Oh, she slipped.
Oh, the jetties, you know, slippery.
Oh, the rope should have been sent to the boat.
She lost her balance and.
They like bang, bang, bang.
It was an accident.
That makes them all look suspicious.
It does make them all suspicious.
And then Uncle Fester, I mean, James.
You keep doing that on purpose.
She says, let's celebrate her life with a drink.
Everyone is well aware she's an alcoholic at this point.
It's tacky.
It's super tacky. And who shows up?
But the inspector, It's time to arrest the first person arrested the colonel.
Well, the spouse is always the first to be suspected, Ray.
Yeah. Okay.
You had a row with your wife. You asked for a divorce.
That's how it is.
But then they released him on bail for the funeral. Yes.
And again, he's so sympathetic.
He shows up in his military uniform, all of his medals.
We find out he's been injured
and isn't even able to like swing in worm because he's so injured.
But he doesn't want anybody to know.
He's very proud, but he clearly cared a lot about her. Yes.
Do you think Lady Felicia knows
that he has a girdle on because she's taken it off at some point?
No, I think it's because she's Anne-Marie's friend.
Okay.
You're tacky.
Okay?
She is a woman of questionable morals.
Those are my husband's shoes. Kiss me.
What? Yeah.
You'd think that he would have died.
Oh, that's right. She's married. You'd think.
No. You're going to make me do things I don't want to do.
I have in my notes.
It's a kissing funeral. Yes, it is.
They always blame the outsider. Yeah.
John is going to be next. Yeah.
And right after the funeral, right to the reading of the.
Well, that's how it happens.
You put the body in the ground, then you can read the will.
Okay. Right away.
Did notice that Anne.
Marie is, like, basically in her pajamas.
Yeah. And I was like, well, I'll find the brown here.
Now, later on we run.
We know why. We know why he's actually invited.
I just don't think that a corpse should show so much skin.
Yeah, that was weird to me. It was.
Like pajamas.
Maybe, but not.
A white hair nightgown.
What do. You want to get buried.
In? Not a white satin nightgown.
I'm going with chicken suit.
Something that covers up the damage.
You know,
whatever.
It's a closed casket, but it's still shaped like a chicken.
Yeah. Whatever happened to me. You know.
How I'm. Thinking?
Like, big bird feet.
Okay, This is a new salad.
What do you want to get buried in?
Something Red.
Big bird.
Big bird. You know, I just.
I want you to put just a white sheet over me with a little circle
that my face pokes out of, so I look like a little ghost gone.
And nothing. Else.
And nothing else? No. Okay.
Any bits underneath the white sheet?
I just.
I don't know. It's just kind of weird.
Yeah, it was weird. It's a fancy. Not like.
Now. We're used to watching every episode where there's a funeral, and.
Most people are dressed in, like, formal wear.
You know?
Men are in suits.
Yeah, women are in, like, a nice blouse or something, which I guess isn't me.
Bare bury me in a t shirt with snarky thing on it.
I don't know some of them black.
But I just was kind of weirded out by it.
And then I questioned why it was weird and I'm like, You shouldn't.
Have bear shoulders at your own. Funeral.
I don't know, like.
Kind of strange.
Like she would be all blue and stuff. I don't know.
Do you think.
This is the most morbid we've got in a while and it's fantastic.
Like the funeral directors got extra work to do
to put makeup on her, her shoulders, or just all that stuff.
Anyhow. The world gets red.
I think everybody acts inappropriate all the time. Yes.
At all the events related to this death.
Yes, I absolutely agree.
Like John Varner may be a communist, he may be an American.
But what offends me most about him is that he just picks the worst
moments to, like, grab a ruby and be like, you've got to give me an alibi.
This is my mother's funeral.
What don't you understand?
Yeah, but then, you know, Valentine shows up at wakes,
at funerals, at will, readings, wherever, and just arrest people.
Yeah.
He has no sense of decorum either.
No, he doesn't like.
I know you're in labor and having a baby, but I'm here to arrest you.
Father Brown is always everywhere all the time, though he does
wear the right vestments. Here.
I did check. Mm.
Oh, And then James is like, Hey, let's stage the play. What
do. Which I have in my notes.
Wait, she wrote the play.
It's what she would have wanted. Mark.
And there are like. Huzzah, you know.
You know what these people. Need?
Hobbies. The frickin Internet.
You know, it tells you a lot about this family,
though, that for their daughter's birthday party,
the whole family has agreed to put on a play. Yes.
For anybody.
Could you ever put plays on when you were a kid?
Oh, you never did that.
No. At home?
No, never.
No. I did. About a.
Buyer's.
So if you acted out a play in your room by yourself, that's one thing.
But if you were like, welcome neighbors,
family, friends, I'm going to put on a one man show.
That's weird.
No, I never invited anybody.
Well, then that's okay.
You put on one man's office.
No, I mean, like my sister
and I would stand
in front of a mirror and lip sync into our hairbrushes or whatever, but
we didn't, like, invite the neighborhood over to watch us do it.
In one of the at least three of them had type scripts that I had to.
Memorize. For who? Me.
I couldn't possibly read the script.
People will notice. Did you at least put.
Like, stuffed animals out as an audience or something.
To know?
Please tell me you were like six and not like 16.
Okay. You're a little kid.
Very new to the new house.
But old enough to use a typewriter.
Yeah,
it's like that video that we're be starting
to see a little you being so serious, acting out a play that you wrote.
I want. Those scripts. Right?
I want those. Scripts. But they are gone.
I know they are gone.
Well, this family has a different level of production.
Yeah, because they have a room
that has at least curtains at one end that they can pull across to set a stage.
Yes, absolutely.
They are hardcore into this.
Suddenly Sid.
Appears, all. My notes say is.
Said. Sid is a fantastic character.
We love him.
He didn't.
No introduction.
Introduction.
He's just a skeezy guy hanging out in the house, kissing Suzy in the hallway.
If you are brand new to Father Brown, you're like, Who is this scumbag?
Yeah, he's awesome.
It should be Mr. Sid Flirty pants.
Yeah. Wow.
Quick kiss me so that this person walking by will not pay us any attention to it.
That might work in an alley, but it doesn't work in a house.
Lady Felicia had him driving around the county
like some sort of hotrod, just driving down Main Street.
Looking for.
As much action. As the.
Two of them.
They're probably leaning out the windows with their tongues out.
Hey, Hey, good luck.
Scrubs, skeezy car flow.
Rolling through down.
Hey, are you?
I've never seen you before,
but I just love that Sid's, like, quick.
He make out with me in this hallway because that will throw suspicion off.
Okay.
If you weren't hit over the head by the fact
that Uncle John Fester is Italian, not Kenyan.
He's not Italian. He's been in Italy.
Been in Italy.
Not in. The.
Paying it over the head here.
Yeah. With the coins.
Yeah. Yeah.
And he speaks Italian to Felicia.
Yeah.
She not Felicia, but Mrs.
M's like I kept all the lira because I'm going to Rome with them.
Screw you.
Well.
James is slipping out of the house to go see Felicia.
Yes, And we.
She doesn't need a ride because Sid's busy.
Like, other than the one moment on the air, on the airplane, on the train.
When Sid has to, like, block the hallway.
He's chatting up.
People the entire time, Huh?
And checking out other people.
But here's the problem.
Another problem Valentine says James can't be the killer
because James has an alibi.
He was still in Kenya when Anne-Marie died. Yes.
And the way he knows this is that Valentine calls and talks
to the police chief in Nairobi
who says that he and James were having dinner that night.
Yes, And I have two issues with this.
There are two big issues with this.
Number one, there's no way he got to, Campbell for it in that amount of time.
It's like three days.
Yes. From Nairobi to Campbell four.
You could hardly do that. Now. Now.
And number two, the police chief should have said, yes,
he was having dinner with me and he's still here in town.
In fact, he's in my office right now.
Would you like to talk to him?
Yeah, like that's the end of the case right there.
Yeah.
They immediately know this man is not James because he couldn't have been there.
Yeah, and that's the end.
But instead, I guess the Nairobi police chief is coy.
I guess it's like, yes, he did have dinner with me three nights ago. Why?
No, don't tell me.
Don't tell my wife good bye.
Okay. Did.
And Lady Felicia there?
Well, now Valentine wants to arrest Felicia because it's not the colonel
and it's not James. So it must be Felicia.
You just going down the list?
It's just going down the list.
This is the worst play ever. It's weird.
The only part about it I really love is James dressed up as a very ugly woman.
Yes, because that is awesome that he has to go on the run
dressed like a hideous woman wearing man's shoes.
And there's a bunch of shoe stuff.
And Felicia looks great in that police uniform.
She does. She does. Because she looks great in everything.
Of course, Father Brown knows what sex is.
Okay?
And he just.
Wants to make Valentine uncomfortable. He's blood thirsty.
He just eats like that.
So it's clearly not blood, but it could have been all kinds of things.
And he just looks like don't don't like fake blood
and don't taste drugs to see what they are and don't.
Then there's a train scene and I'm happy because I love trains.
And this is an old timey train.
And there are people in the old timey outfits on the old timey train,
and Father Brown's crawling around on the floor. Yes.
So let me ask you a quick question about train.
Did you notice
there's at least one point where Sid looks at one of the passengers is like, hey.
Hey, baby, Did you notice. There's at least.
One point where Father Brown gets slapped on the. App?
Yeah,
because he's.
Looking at everybody's shoes and that woman is like.
Oh, I say, and slapped. Him on it.
But yeah.
Okay, so here's my question about trains.
And you may not know the answer to this. Yeah.
So at one point he's in a car where there's a center aisle.
Yes. Right.
Those are not sleeper cars.
No, not private compartments. Right.
Third class.
But then he goes through another one where the hall
the aisle is to the right side of the compartment.
And then in the next one, it's to the left side of the compartment.
Do they they go back and forth like that down a train.
Doesn't matter. Okay. So they might all be on the same side.
Might all be on the same side.
And that is second or first class.
I thought maybe they did it like balance out the weight or something.
Okay. It's not. Like that. Doesn't matter now. Okay.
Does he have to get his butt slapped in every car
that he goes through or just that one? I don't know.
Only in third class.
It's like this is an opportunity for me to talk to some young lady.
Yeah.
Well, it's always an opportunity for him to talk to young ladies.
I did not come into this episode misremembering Anne Marie as the killer
like you did, but I did completely forget what happens to James. Yes.
When he gets hit by the train. I was. Oh,
splat.
Okay, okay.
There is no way, no way at all that he could have done that by accident.
He kills himself. Here. Why?
Because he would have seen or heard that train coming.
And there's no way you could have thought I can beat that train
if it was that close.
You don't think he could have been so preoccupied that he didn't.
Know. It's going the opposite direction?
No, no.
It would have been so loud and so present that he he knew what he was doing.
I can buy that. And here's why.
Because when I'm watching him run down the train, clearly looking for a way out,
I was thinking, don't jump off the end of the train, jump off the side,
because then it's grassy and you've got a hill to kind of roll down
and break your fall. Yeah.
If you had to jump off a train, would you jump off the back or the side?
The side, Absolutely.
Jump for them for the same reason,
because I think landing and gravel and rails would be far more painful if.
You hit your head on that rail. You're done. You're done.
You are completely done. Never mind some steel.
There's another train. Yeah.
So I, I can buy your argument.
I think maybe he did know and did that on purpose.
But what are they going to bury him in?
Well, in his.
These is a lot of catching.
His dressing is wig.
They might have to keep him in that to hide it.
You're going to hide all of his injuries. It's a closed. Gasket.
We know that Lady Felicia is not dead because we're not shown her shot.
Okay?
We know she's not dead because she's in the trunk.
Well, there's.
She goes in the trunk during practice.
Yeah, she goes in the trunk during the performance.
Yeah, but in the trunk, everybody's being stupid.
No, but there's the implication that she might be shot.
Father Brown takes the catch up. He knows that she's.
Not because there was a gunshot. That we don't know where that.
But the question I have is,
why is there a giant vat of labeled chloroform in this house?
Don't we have one to.
No, we do not have a giant vat of chloroform in the house.
Well, if we did, I would want it to be clearly labeled.
Okay.
Wouldn't you?
I guess I'm sure it has some gardening use
because isn't that always the excuse?
We use it for pests or it has a use in the garden.
The other problem this episode is there's multiple endings in there.
Weird. All of them are weird.
So we're a church.
Well, first said says the necklace was fake.
Yeah, because Sid's knowledgeable of these things.
He mixes with the kind of crowd that would know. Yes.
That the real necklace had been hawked. Yes.
So? As so, we know that the necklace that
James stole and then consequently got run over while wearing.
Yes. Was fake. Yes.
So then there's the discussion between the daughter
and the father, Ruby and Gomez, about.
This colonel where he admits that they were deep, deep, deep in debt.
And the reason why he opposed her marriage to the red American was that
they hoped she would marry Well, to someone with money. Yes.
With the implication,
of course, the death duties that is affecting all these people.
Yeah, well, and just maintaining a house of that size when you don't
still own all the estate and the farmland that you get revenue from.
Not you. Just can't maintain it.
Like setting up the NHS, right.
Yeah. Yeah.
Then Ruby and John get married.
Ruby and John get married.
The real uncle shows up.
And Felicia comes is like.
Felicia is on them, like white on. Rose.
And I'm stuck because there's a camera.
The camera that's taking the wedding photo.
Yes, Because you're obsessed with cameras.
I love cameras.
You like old equipment.
This camera is beautiful.
It is a 1932 or three,
620 Kodak is often called an octagon
because has a beautiful art deco octagon on the front of.
The photographer's covering the flash with his hand, isn't he?
No, he's covering up the light from the sun so he can look down and see.
Oh, I see. So he's shading it for image.
Yes. Now, that camera could not have taken that picture. No.
Because that pictures at 16 by nine and that camera doesn't take.
Pictures, but it could have taken the color.
It it could have taken the color photo.
In fact, on the page that I'll put in the show notes, which.
Is the case, there are any other camera nerds out there, which.
Is art deco cameras, which is another site that I could lose like a million.
You know.
There are colored pictures of this camera was released only in the UK.
So there are pictures of whales and thatched roof cottages.
And they're full color.
Yes, they're. Full color photos.
It is a pretty camera.
It's a very pretty camera.
And and it's not it's not anachronistic or anything.
No, no. It was released by the Times. Yep.
That the episode sat.
Absolutely non anachronistic.
Unlike Father Brown's bicycle.
But you should. Listen to the last. Episode. Yeah
Chris discuss his bicycle ad nauseum.
The and yes best corpse.
We've only got one But she's. Good She is.
She deserves.
It. She's in the water.
She is.
That's a nice shot of her through the slats of the.
Yeah. With her eyes like wide open.
She doesn't blink, her eyes don't dilate.
She's in a suit. Address. Suit.
Yes. That is wet.
I feel sorry for the costume people who have to maintain
all these vintage clothes and know that that one's going in the pond.
Yes, ma'am.
She does a good job.
That's a segment we call Best Cast, where we talk about the best corpse
acting in the episode. Yes.
The next segment that we do at the end of episodes is after the credits.
What which is and.
What happens.
At the after the episode is over to the people in the episode.
Because this all started from an episode of midsummer where we realized
the most horrible person in the world inherited Jess.
And then became the DCI. Yes. Yeah. Okay.
Same actor, different character. Yes.
So we know that John and Ruby get married.
Yes. The colonel is going to lose the house.
But as Father Brown points out, maybe that's a good thing.
I think it's like if I'm the colonel,
I'm kind of like I'm out from under this house.
I loved my alcoholic wife, but there is a trauma to get over there.
Mm hmm. He was kind of abused by her. Yeah.
So I think that maybe he's going to enjoy some freedom.
Yeah.
Maybe he shouldn't travel so much if they have no money.
I think he traveled for the military.
Yeah, So I think I.
You know, he's.
He's part of the old boys network.
I think he's going to be fine.
What about John and Ruby?
I think if they moved to the US, they might be okay.
He's kind of a scholar. He's a communist.
A communist.
Maybe they'll get a little cottage and he can live with them.
Maybe Lady and Felicia.
Maybe Felicia.
Said, are drooling on the windows of the car going down Main.
Street.
And James, whose real name is Michael Short,
is going to be buried in a small box.
Yeah.
Well, he is.
He is buried. He gets a grave marker, but.
He gets. To share a grave with his mother because they're.
So little so. They can put. Him in there.
Oh, sorry. Michael Short.
Yes. And that's the. End you. Can find.
Wait a minute. What's our next episode?
What's what's episode?
Three episodes three.
The wrong shape.
Mm hmm.
Just as a side note, if you are curious, the collection
of stories that the original version of The Falling Stars by G.K.
Chesterton is from is Open Source.
Now it is online. You can find it.
I'll put a link if you want to read it for free.
You can.
It's set at Christmas.
There's a weird discussion of blackface.
Flambeau.
Flambeau is in it, and Flambeau is completely different in the stories
and he's in the show.
If you've seen later
seasons of the show, he's a completely different kind of character.
But it is.
They're worth a read.
Yeah, they're worth a read.
But just don't compare them because they're nothing like this.
They're very different, but they are worth a read.
The Wrong Shape is the next episode.
Let me read you the synopsis.
Poet hangs himself in a locked conservatory.
Father Brown thinks that it's not suicide, but murder.
It's the one with the hippies and the free love. Yes,
it's a fun one.
Oh, Mrs..
M turns inside.
Out with judgment on everybody, and.
She can't handle. It.
It's so bad for her.
It's not the S&M episode later on,
but it's pretty darn close.
They go pretty far.
Wow. I can't believe those words came out of my mouth.
But it's a fun one.
So we hope you'll come back.
Yeah.
If you're new to the show,
we hope you'll come back for episode three of season one.
If you're not new, we're glad you're here.
We enjoy you so much if.
You are new. We also have a Facebook page.
We have a Twitter follow and Instagram to follow.
We have an Instagram behind the scenes channel where we talk about all the stuff
that goes on in the making in the episodes and craziness that is our lives.
We have an even if you're new to the show, you haven't even begun
to realize how crazy our lives are.
There's also a subreddit for mystery maniacs.
And if you're listening or watching on YouTube, please hit
like and subscribe and hit the bell.
It is all good for us. Yeah.
And we just like knowing that you're there.
It's great.
We just we want to build.
Our goal is to build community.
And that is the way in which you do it these days.
That is the way you do it.
So until next week, by.
Maniac, by mania
is. All
well, good for us Welcome to the by you podcast of actual.