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Have you ever stayed with something long after it stopped fitting? Not because you still wanted it, but because leaving felt like an admission of failure? A job. A relationship. A friendship. A city. A belief. A role in your family. Even a version of yourself that everyone else got used to. Sometimes the question isn’t “Do I still want this?” but “What does it say about me if I change my mind now?"
In this episode of Right Here, hosts Christopher Mooney, LCSW and Kenyon Phillips, LMSW talk about why changing course can feel so much like failure—even when it may actually be a sign of growth, honesty, or new information. They unpack sunk-cost thinking, the pressure to stay consistent, the fear of looking foolish, and what happens when other people have become comfortable with the version of you that no longer fits. They also explore an important distinction: Is something difficult because it matters—or because it no longer belongs in your life? Not every hard thing is the wrong thing. But not every commitment deserves endless loyalty. The conversation gets into the identity piece, too—the grief that can come with outgrowing the person who always finishes, always stays, never needs help, or never changes their mind. And why you don’t have to criticize your former self in order to choose differently now. Chris and Kenyon offer practical ways to change direction with integrity: Ask what you would choose today, separate the cost of the past from the next decision, experiment with smaller changes first, say what has changed plainly, and make room for the grief, relief, fear, and excitement that can all exist at the same time. Changing your mind doesn’t necessarily mean you got it wrong. Sometimes it just means you know something now that you didn’t know then.
Creators and Guests
What is Right Here?
Right Here is a mental health podcast that explores the psychological patterns shaping our relationships, choices, and inner lives. Hosted by therapists Christopher Mooney, LCSW, and Kenyon Phillips, LMSW, each episode offers grounded, compassionate conversations rooted in clinical insight and real human experience. No jargon. No judgment. Just clear, thoughtful dialogue designed to help listeners better understand themselves and the people around them.