March 2020 was the beginning of a new reality for most of us—kids at home, adults at home, adult kids at home, everyone at home. As time passed, kids went back to school, but many adults continued working from home, which could be a significant change for many of us. There are so many good things about parents being at home, there for the kids, and there to help with the kids; when kids are napping, one parent can be at home while the other runs errands, so they have more time together. Some things may need improvement about both parents being at home, roles requiring clarification, and maybe too much time together. Seeing each other every day, all day, and all night might get annoying and on each other's nerves. Let's talk about how to cope with spending so much time together.
Don’t hold grudges: When you are constantly together, the only way to get through the day is to either spill or let it go. Always remind yourself to let go of things that aren’t important. If something is bothering you, take a minute and talk about it.
Make time for each other: I know this sounds silly when you spend every day with each other, but you still need quality time together. Plan something fun to do, not just the mundane that is life. Play a game, go for a walk, go out to eat…
Compromise: Spending so much time together, there are going to be things that you are struggling with that your partner is doing. You have to discuss these things and devise a compromise so you don’t go crazy on each other. Maybe it's something as small as you feeling like you are constantly checked up during the day; compromise might be staying in different sections of the house until certain times, like lunch. It might be as simple as changing your approach, but discuss it and meet in the middle.
Admit when you're just fed up: Sometimes, we are in a bad mood and need space. Everything the other person does gets on your nerves; you need space. Let the other person know you are having a bad day so they can be more sensitive and not take too much personally.
Time Out: Be honest if you need some time alone. Don’t just be grumpy and out of sorts with each other; take time for yourself. Go for a walk by yourself, play pickleball with friends, read a book, watch a show you want to watch all by yourself, whatever you need for a few hours to get away from each other. Absence makes the heart grow fonder…does it??
I hope these tips help you cope with so much time together. Please send us any suggestions you might have.
Lemonade moment of the week:
Paige is out of town, so Darren is busy re-doing the laundry room.
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What is Where's the Lemonade??
They say when life gives you lemons you should make lemonade. Making lemonade is not always easy or possible. For us, we found ourselves single in our 40's with kids at home and starting life over again. Luckily we found each other, online no doubt. When we began blending families, schedules, traditions, and laundry, we discovered lots of lemons. Our podcast is a reflection on how we get through the hard times and enjoy the good times on our new journey together, all with ten kids in tow. Sometimes when life gives you lemons, you make lemon squares. Lemonade might come later.