WEBVTT NOTE This file was generated by Descript 00:00:01.700 --> 00:00:04.940 Hey, this is a podcast for coaches and I am Mark Butler. 00:00:05.960 --> 00:00:09.080 I wanted to share an interview with you that I recorded well over a year 00:00:09.080 --> 00:00:10.790 ago with my friend, Amber Smith. 00:00:11.360 --> 00:00:14.780 Amber is a coach who has experimented with lots of different business models. 00:00:14.780 --> 00:00:16.939 And she's had some success in all of them. 00:00:17.840 --> 00:00:20.240 But one of the places where Amber and I have connected is in the 00:00:20.240 --> 00:00:22.160 fact that she is so committed. 00:00:22.700 --> 00:00:23.120 Too. 00:00:23.120 --> 00:00:26.390 And so skilled in one-on-one coaching, she has. 00:00:26.930 --> 00:00:28.490 An incredible voice for this work. 00:00:28.490 --> 00:00:29.779 She has great insight. 00:00:29.810 --> 00:00:31.970 She's a student of the work that we all do. 00:00:32.480 --> 00:00:35.540 And I love her perspective and I've been so excited to share it with you. 00:00:35.540 --> 00:00:37.760 So I dug this recording out of my archives. 00:00:38.120 --> 00:00:40.370 I cleaned it up, gave it some light editing. 00:00:41.540 --> 00:00:42.890 Got ambers permission. 00:00:42.920 --> 00:00:45.290 And with her permission, I'm sharing it with you today. 00:00:45.920 --> 00:00:47.030 Her name is Amber Smith. 00:00:47.060 --> 00:00:51.920 You can find her at www dot it's Amber smith.com and she's on 00:00:51.920 --> 00:00:54.590 Instagram at it's Amber Smith. 00:00:55.370 --> 00:00:59.450 So without further ado, here's my conversation from late 2022. 00:00:59.840 --> 00:01:01.640 With my friend, Amber Smith. 00:01:03.280 --> 00:01:07.080 You're a coach, you're a coach who does a variety of things. 00:01:07.080 --> 00:01:09.010 That's part of why I wanted to chat with you other than I 00:01:09.040 --> 00:01:10.339 just like you and respect you. 00:01:10.340 --> 00:01:14.889 But the background I'm going to give on Amber is that I've known 00:01:14.890 --> 00:01:18.490 Amber for, or known of Amber for a while, known Amber for a while. 00:01:18.930 --> 00:01:23.760 And when Kate and I, Kate, my wife and I interacted with you almost a year ago now. 00:01:24.515 --> 00:01:25.405 Was it almost a year ago? 00:01:25.635 --> 00:01:25.995 I don't know. 00:01:26.035 --> 00:01:26.745 I don't know when it was. 00:01:27.855 --> 00:01:29.485 Kate said she could coach you. 00:01:29.895 --> 00:01:31.055 And Kate never says that. 00:01:31.125 --> 00:01:34.285 Kate has, to be clear, Kate has never said that. 00:01:35.055 --> 00:01:39.295 And I trust Kate's instincts about people way more than I trust 00:01:39.295 --> 00:01:40.625 my own instincts about people. 00:01:41.425 --> 00:01:42.535 And so I respect you. 00:01:42.535 --> 00:01:43.544 I respect your work. 00:01:44.584 --> 00:01:48.035 And I think you have a lot to say to the people whose attention I have. 00:01:48.785 --> 00:01:53.835 The thing we actually, I want to make sure we don't miss this is that I want to talk 00:01:53.835 --> 00:01:56.285 to you about one on one client creation. 00:01:57.160 --> 00:01:57.570 Yeah. 00:01:57.650 --> 00:01:59.470 Because I think that's how you say it, don't you? 00:02:00.390 --> 00:02:00.690 Yeah. 00:02:00.710 --> 00:02:03.500 I do use the word create one on one clients. 00:02:04.030 --> 00:02:05.130 Which I want to hear about. 00:02:05.280 --> 00:02:08.239 And then I imagine as we talk about that, we'll, we'll find 00:02:08.239 --> 00:02:09.910 our way into other topics. 00:02:10.960 --> 00:02:11.400 Yeah. 00:02:12.419 --> 00:02:14.799 Talk to me about one on one client creation. 00:02:14.810 --> 00:02:19.049 What just, what comes to mind when I even give you that, that mini prompt? 00:02:19.900 --> 00:02:22.790 Yeah, the first thing that comes to mind is a story, , to like 00:02:22.790 --> 00:02:24.210 demonstrate what I'm talking about. 00:02:24.310 --> 00:02:27.090 I have three girls, I coached their t ball team. 00:02:27.480 --> 00:02:30.160 I don't know if we've talked about this story, you and I, but it's relevant 00:02:30.170 --> 00:02:31.239 to creating one on one clients. 00:02:31.250 --> 00:02:36.590 And I'm sitting at this t ball game and, , another mom was there 00:02:36.590 --> 00:02:37.850 and she's like, so what do you do? 00:02:37.850 --> 00:02:39.090 And, you know, I'm like, Oh, I'm a coach. 00:02:39.090 --> 00:02:42.800 And she goes, Oh, like, like Jen Sincero, who wrote, you were a bad 00:02:42.800 --> 00:02:44.730 ass, you know, it's like, funny. 00:02:44.790 --> 00:02:44.920 Yeah. 00:02:44.920 --> 00:02:45.410 Like, kind of like that. 00:02:45.590 --> 00:02:46.000 She went straight there. 00:02:46.725 --> 00:02:47.095 Yeah. 00:02:47.125 --> 00:02:50.205 Like she had just finished the book and so, , it was on her mind. 00:02:50.225 --> 00:02:50.505 Right. 00:02:50.875 --> 00:02:52.045 And I'm like, yeah, kind of like that. 00:02:52.045 --> 00:02:53.085 And she's like, that's so cool. 00:02:53.085 --> 00:02:54.645 And I was like, yeah, so what do you do? 00:02:55.245 --> 00:02:56.905 And she's like, I'm a real estate agent. 00:02:56.905 --> 00:02:57.955 And I'm like, that's so cool. 00:02:57.994 --> 00:02:58.544 , how's it going? 00:02:58.544 --> 00:02:59.324 And she's like, really good. 00:02:59.344 --> 00:03:00.334 It was, she's in Utah. 00:03:00.334 --> 00:03:04.044 So back in the day, , you know, let's see, this was in 20. 00:03:05.135 --> 00:03:08.115 And the 2020, maybe 2021 anyway. 00:03:08.405 --> 00:03:09.465 And she was like, it's going good. 00:03:09.465 --> 00:03:10.505 Like things are awesome. 00:03:10.535 --> 00:03:13.605 I, I'm, I'm selling a lot of houses and I'm like, cool. 00:03:13.605 --> 00:03:15.755 And so we just kind of chatted back and forth about her business. 00:03:16.455 --> 00:03:19.725 And, , she's like, well, like, tell me more about like this coaching 00:03:19.725 --> 00:03:21.435 thing, you know, just in conversation. 00:03:21.435 --> 00:03:23.834 And so I was like, yeah, well, I talked to people that were 00:03:23.835 --> 00:03:25.044 with a lot of entrepreneurs. 00:03:25.925 --> 00:03:28.045 , it's a lot about, you know, just mindset. 00:03:28.480 --> 00:03:32.490 Creating the life you want, overcoming what you think is limiting you. 00:03:32.600 --> 00:03:34.480 And she's like, yeah, I really need that. 00:03:34.510 --> 00:03:38.220 I think we should talk about what it might look like to, to coach. 00:03:38.230 --> 00:03:41.250 And I was like, yeah, maybe like we can talk about it maybe next week. 00:03:42.010 --> 00:03:42.249 Okay. 00:03:42.249 --> 00:03:44.669 But did she really go straight there? 00:03:44.950 --> 00:03:48.079 Did she really go straight to, she wanted to know if we should talk because 00:03:48.099 --> 00:03:49.880 she had just read the book, right? 00:03:50.250 --> 00:03:53.450 She's like, well, what would it look like for me to be like coached? 00:03:53.640 --> 00:03:55.350 Like, does, do you coach people like me? 00:03:55.420 --> 00:03:58.329 Cause like we'd kind of just talked and I didn't really like 00:03:58.339 --> 00:04:00.719 feel like it was appropriate to be like, yeah, let me coach you. 00:04:00.719 --> 00:04:02.490 And I was like, well, we can talk about it more next week. 00:04:02.490 --> 00:04:06.250 Like what it might be like, you know, cause she had admitted that she was 00:04:06.250 --> 00:04:08.010 trying to get into luxury real estate. 00:04:08.869 --> 00:04:11.449 And so I kind of like was talking about what it means. 00:04:11.479 --> 00:04:15.480 Like, I think I used the big leap as an example of something we 00:04:15.480 --> 00:04:16.850 were talking for like 40 minutes. 00:04:16.850 --> 00:04:19.079 Like it was like a, it was a coaching conversation. 00:04:19.079 --> 00:04:21.739 I didn't call it that, but it was totally a coaching conversation. 00:04:22.255 --> 00:04:26.375 But my husband had been like, kind of, I don't know, not like eavesdropping, 00:04:26.375 --> 00:04:27.775 but kind of just right there. 00:04:27.795 --> 00:04:30.715 And he was like, why didn't you like sell her coaching? 00:04:30.745 --> 00:04:32.224 Like, she obviously wants it. 00:04:32.234 --> 00:04:34.085 And I'm like, that's not how clients are made. 00:04:35.445 --> 00:04:36.715 She's not actually quite ready. 00:04:36.715 --> 00:04:38.185 She's interested right now. 00:04:38.394 --> 00:04:40.364 You know, she's, she thinks it's really cool. 00:04:40.374 --> 00:04:43.645 Cause she just read this book, but like, I don't know if she's ready to actually 00:04:43.725 --> 00:04:45.445 like talk about coaching together. 00:04:46.075 --> 00:04:47.695 And he's like, okay. 00:04:48.030 --> 00:04:49.930 He's like, watch, he just couldn't understand it. 00:04:50.400 --> 00:04:52.930 So then the next week we're at t ball and she's like, I can't stop 00:04:52.930 --> 00:04:54.180 thinking about our conversation. 00:04:55.040 --> 00:04:55.870 Like I cannot stop. 00:04:56.060 --> 00:04:57.610 Can I, I cannot stop thinking about it. 00:04:57.610 --> 00:04:59.360 I really want to do luxury real estate. 00:04:59.380 --> 00:05:00.180 I'm nervous. 00:05:00.619 --> 00:05:03.929 I think what you talked about with like self concept is really important. 00:05:04.449 --> 00:05:06.310 And I was like, yeah, I'm like, I'm really glad it was helpful. 00:05:06.319 --> 00:05:08.850 Would you want to like schedule like an official. 00:05:08.850 --> 00:05:08.930 Yeah. 00:05:09.470 --> 00:05:13.310 Coaching call where we like, actually, like I show you what I do in like 00:05:13.550 --> 00:05:17.580 real life, not at the T ball game, but like we can schedule a real call. 00:05:18.160 --> 00:05:21.379 And then we did, so it was like a month later, but she ended up hiring me. 00:05:21.399 --> 00:05:25.069 And I feel like the process that it went through, I think I had a little 00:05:25.069 --> 00:05:28.509 bit of an advantage because she had just finished that book from a coach. 00:05:28.530 --> 00:05:28.840 Right. 00:05:28.860 --> 00:05:34.810 So it's fresh on her mind, but even if it wasn't just like, We started as friends 00:05:34.820 --> 00:05:39.660 and she'd be like, I created her into a client, but not like, I wasn't like at the 00:05:39.670 --> 00:05:42.160 T ball game being like, Hey, I'm a coach. 00:05:42.160 --> 00:05:43.210 Like, come work with me. 00:05:46.890 --> 00:05:48.270 You were not handing out flyers. 00:05:48.860 --> 00:05:50.150 The whole little billboard. 00:05:51.090 --> 00:05:54.059 Here's, here's one of the many things that fascinates me about this. 00:05:54.229 --> 00:05:58.529 In, in an earlier episode of this podcast, I talk about how I think 00:05:58.530 --> 00:06:02.770 content's main job in a one on one coaching business is to create a very 00:06:02.770 --> 00:06:04.909 soft landing for people into your world. 00:06:05.690 --> 00:06:09.150 But it did not occur to me that other people's content could create 00:06:09.150 --> 00:06:11.090 a soft landing into your world. 00:06:11.120 --> 00:06:14.890 And that's what Jen, Jen Sincero's book did for you that day. 00:06:15.880 --> 00:06:21.000 So there is something to be said there about how, and I'll be curious to have 00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:25.299 you comment, comment on this, but I do have the belief that if someone has any 00:06:25.299 --> 00:06:31.919 sort of context whatsoever as it relates to coaching, then they are miles ahead. 00:06:32.785 --> 00:06:36.285 of a person who doesn't have that context when it's time to engage 00:06:36.285 --> 00:06:37.875 them in a coaching conversation. 00:06:37.885 --> 00:06:38.975 What do you think about that? 00:06:38.975 --> 00:06:39.825 What would you add to that? 00:06:40.705 --> 00:06:41.474 Yeah, I agree. 00:06:41.475 --> 00:06:43.865 I think I would have approached the conversation a lot different 00:06:43.865 --> 00:06:45.355 if she had never heard of coaching. 00:06:45.395 --> 00:06:50.834 It'd be a very much gentler conversation because it was front of mind. 00:06:50.845 --> 00:06:52.134 She had just finished the book. 00:06:52.144 --> 00:06:53.515 I think it was, it was different. 00:06:53.525 --> 00:06:55.695 She already had her soft landing into the coaching. 00:06:56.335 --> 00:06:59.624 , but I've had conversations with people who know nothing about coaching. 00:07:00.095 --> 00:07:00.345 Yeah. 00:07:00.405 --> 00:07:01.065 And. 00:07:01.630 --> 00:07:03.010 They are like, so what is it? 00:07:03.060 --> 00:07:05.350 And it's funny because I think you and I have probably probably have similar. 00:07:05.450 --> 00:07:08.500 Well, you talk to people like we talk, talk. 00:07:08.900 --> 00:07:12.780 That's when I ask questions and they say things and yeah. 00:07:13.180 --> 00:07:13.640 Yeah. 00:07:14.440 --> 00:07:17.969 And the best thing that I think I offer people is like, well, let me 00:07:17.969 --> 00:07:20.030 just like, what if we just coached? 00:07:20.405 --> 00:07:21.985 It's, it's hard to talk about in theory. 00:07:21.985 --> 00:07:23.675 Like, what if I just showed you what that's like? 00:07:24.655 --> 00:07:25.865 Do you call it something? 00:07:26.015 --> 00:07:28.795 In your own mind, do you call it a consultation? 00:07:28.795 --> 00:07:30.915 Do you call it a, what do you call it? 00:07:31.035 --> 00:07:33.175 It's, it depends on who I talk to. 00:07:33.785 --> 00:07:34.814 Right now I call it a chat. 00:07:36.344 --> 00:07:37.605 You want to chat about working together? 00:07:37.635 --> 00:07:40.555 Like, especially if it's someone that's been in my world for a while, 00:07:40.965 --> 00:07:44.474 if it's a coach, often they will say, can we have a consultation? 00:07:44.914 --> 00:07:45.775 Yes, fine. 00:07:45.885 --> 00:07:49.224 In my mind, I don't think of it as a consultation because I think you 00:07:49.224 --> 00:07:51.085 and I think similarly about this. 00:07:51.205 --> 00:07:53.324 I'm not looking to close a sale. 00:07:53.744 --> 00:07:56.305 I'm looking to open a relationship with this person. 00:07:56.325 --> 00:07:58.135 So it's not always even a consultation. 00:07:58.145 --> 00:08:04.395 It's like, Let's see if we even like talking to each other, you know, you 00:08:04.395 --> 00:08:07.485 just triggered my memory of, , what you were saying to me when we were 00:08:07.485 --> 00:08:10.324 together a couple of weeks ago about different types of gardeners. 00:08:10.335 --> 00:08:13.284 And I was telling you, I have an episode of this show about gardening. 00:08:13.285 --> 00:08:14.035 So don't let me forget. 00:08:14.035 --> 00:08:15.325 I want to come back to that, but. 00:08:16.295 --> 00:08:18.955 I want to go back to the moment where you're talking with the first 00:08:18.975 --> 00:08:22.605 conversation you're having with this realtor, because your, your story from 00:08:22.605 --> 00:08:25.694 your husband, I think really contrasts. 00:08:25.975 --> 00:08:29.475 It demonstrates the two sides of a coach's brain. 00:08:29.485 --> 00:08:31.794 It just happened that your husband was one half of that 00:08:31.794 --> 00:08:33.354 brain and you were the other half. 00:08:33.675 --> 00:08:37.005 I think it illustrates a struggle that so many coaches deal with in the 00:08:37.005 --> 00:08:41.815 moment of the conversation, which is as you're talking with her and she says 00:08:41.815 --> 00:08:43.935 to you, Oh, you mean like Jensen Charo? 00:08:44.240 --> 00:08:48.410 That kind of coaching, how in that moment, do you not jump straight 00:08:48.420 --> 00:08:52.840 to a transactional attitude of, Oh, I could probably get quote, get a 00:08:52.859 --> 00:08:55.750 client right now, because that's where your husband's brain went. 00:08:55.750 --> 00:08:58.720 And that's where so many of our friends and clients brains go. 00:08:59.569 --> 00:08:59.900 Yeah. 00:09:00.050 --> 00:09:03.470 Well, and what's funny is like I first offered to , get her 00:09:03.470 --> 00:09:04.760 in touch with other coaches. 00:09:04.820 --> 00:09:07.700 Like I didn't think of myself as like her coach. 00:09:07.835 --> 00:09:08.125 Okay. 00:09:09.020 --> 00:09:13.030 Because I didn't know, like I, I didn't know, I don't assume 00:09:13.035 --> 00:09:14.290 that I'm everyone's coach. 00:09:14.320 --> 00:09:16.630 I don't walk into a room and be like, I can coach everyone. 00:09:16.630 --> 00:09:18.310 Like you're my, you're my potential client. 00:09:18.315 --> 00:09:20.230 Like the word that I've heard other people describe. 00:09:20.685 --> 00:09:23.165 Other, other coaches that do this is like poaching. 00:09:23.995 --> 00:09:25.965 Like I'm out to get you as a client. 00:09:26.615 --> 00:09:28.405 And that's just not my style. 00:09:29.595 --> 00:09:31.304 And it feels creepy. 00:09:31.305 --> 00:09:37.224 Some people might say to you, Amber, Oh, but Amber, if, if 00:09:37.235 --> 00:09:39.244 your first thought is that. 00:09:39.790 --> 00:09:41.890 Maybe I could help her find a coach. 00:09:42.750 --> 00:09:45.560 Somebody might say to you, but well, don't you value yourself? 00:09:45.570 --> 00:09:48.240 Aren't you, aren't you confident in your coaching? 00:09:48.240 --> 00:09:49.930 Why are you trying to send her elsewhere? 00:09:49.930 --> 00:09:51.130 What, what would be your reply? 00:09:51.180 --> 00:09:51.520 Yeah. 00:09:51.829 --> 00:09:56.780 So I actually, I listened to your episode, the new, your newest one, 00:09:56.780 --> 00:09:59.289 just to kind of get a feel for what you've been talking about. 00:09:59.369 --> 00:10:00.920 And you said something that I resonate with. 00:10:01.760 --> 00:10:04.030 I'm almost always fully booked. 00:10:04.390 --> 00:10:08.960 I'm, I'm not needing clients and fully booked based on like what you said, 00:10:08.960 --> 00:10:11.850 like based on my inventory, right? 00:10:12.200 --> 00:10:14.899 I have nine, I have eight one on one clients right now. 00:10:14.940 --> 00:10:16.519 And that feels really good to me. 00:10:17.170 --> 00:10:19.219 I think at the time when I was talking to her, I maybe had 00:10:19.219 --> 00:10:20.760 five or six, but that felt. 00:10:21.185 --> 00:10:24.715 Full to me, it's not like I'm out there looking. 00:10:24.715 --> 00:10:28.015 And so in my first inclination was like, I just want to help this person. 00:10:28.015 --> 00:10:30.675 It might, you know, it might be some, like someone I know it might 00:10:30.675 --> 00:10:34.904 be a real estate coach that like only coaches real estate agents. 00:10:36.685 --> 00:10:40.434 And so I do value my coaching, but I don't also, it's like that juxtaposition 00:10:40.435 --> 00:10:42.254 of like, I also don't need clients. 00:10:44.095 --> 00:10:48.135 As you heard me say in that episode and as you're saying now, it's, I find 00:10:48.135 --> 00:10:53.564 it easier to generate that confidence when I am quote unquote fully booked. 00:10:53.954 --> 00:10:58.114 Do you remember feeling any differently when you weren't fully booked? 00:10:58.945 --> 00:11:02.444 What did you do back then to generate that sort of peace and confidence to 00:11:02.445 --> 00:11:04.075 take into those interactions with people? 00:11:05.005 --> 00:11:06.785 Yeah, I was coaching. 00:11:06.875 --> 00:11:09.335 Like I was having conversations often. 00:11:10.595 --> 00:11:14.045 And I think one of the things that I don't think enough coaches do, we can talk, I'm 00:11:14.045 --> 00:11:17.934 curious what your thoughts are about this, but I like positioned it, especially as 00:11:17.934 --> 00:11:19.675 in your coach is like, you're helping me. 00:11:20.939 --> 00:11:21.370 Oh, yeah. 00:11:21.370 --> 00:11:21.580 Okay. 00:11:21.670 --> 00:11:23.360 You say yes to coaching. 00:11:23.360 --> 00:11:26.980 Like you're helping me get experience, especially as a new coach, which I 00:11:26.980 --> 00:11:28.300 don't see very many people doing that. 00:11:28.800 --> 00:11:29.100 No. 00:11:30.280 --> 00:11:34.130 But like, that's where I, so I had a goal to the coach, a hundred people for free. 00:11:34.800 --> 00:11:38.395 And I let my whole like Yeah. 00:11:38.415 --> 00:11:39.295 Like this is how I started. 00:11:39.485 --> 00:11:39.814 Sorry. 00:11:39.814 --> 00:11:43.515 I'm laughing because literally, so this episode hasn't been published, but 00:11:43.525 --> 00:11:46.595 literally yesterday I was, I was doing an interview with another client of mine. 00:11:46.855 --> 00:11:51.805 We were talking along these same lines and I said, I have this, this urge to 00:11:51.824 --> 00:11:55.175 invite coaches to do 100 conversations. 00:11:56.414 --> 00:11:58.724 So this is just for those of you listening, Amber and 00:11:58.724 --> 00:12:00.464 I often laugh about how we. 00:12:00.465 --> 00:12:00.554 Yeah. 00:12:00.925 --> 00:12:04.485 Seem to run into the same thoughts often independent of each other, but 00:12:04.855 --> 00:12:08.645 yeah, that a hundred conversations thing and the thing of where you're 00:12:08.665 --> 00:12:12.295 in, you're acknowledging that they're really helping you in those early days. 00:12:12.325 --> 00:12:17.824 In another episode, I talked about how when sometimes when people say I'm 00:12:17.824 --> 00:12:21.215 considering this 10, 000 or 15, 000 mastermind and they're very early in 00:12:21.215 --> 00:12:27.204 their business, I'll say, Hey, instead buy a hundred gift cards and pay people. 00:12:27.685 --> 00:12:33.155 To let you coach them with those gift cards, get yourself in, plant a bunch 00:12:33.155 --> 00:12:37.585 of seeds, do a lot of practicing, become a better listener, become interested in 00:12:37.585 --> 00:12:43.235 people it, it, I feel like it creates this inevitability of, of, of success. 00:12:43.245 --> 00:12:44.245 If you'll do that. 00:12:44.254 --> 00:12:45.104 It sounds like you did it. 00:12:46.095 --> 00:12:46.525 I did. 00:12:46.554 --> 00:12:48.165 Well, and one of the questions I get is like, well, how do 00:12:48.165 --> 00:12:51.105 you become a masterful coach? 00:12:51.125 --> 00:12:54.175 Cause like a lot of clients are interested in how I coach and 00:12:54.175 --> 00:12:55.425 I'm like, well, I've coached. 00:12:55.790 --> 00:12:58.550 So many people that's how you can't skip the part where you 00:12:58.550 --> 00:13:00.640 coach people, you know what I mean? 00:13:01.079 --> 00:13:05.310 And so I went right into it I think I was gifted the opportunity of like I 00:13:05.310 --> 00:13:09.340 didn't really have anyone in my ear at this time I hadn't found any podcast. 00:13:09.350 --> 00:13:10.579 I didn't find Rich Litvin yet. 00:13:10.590 --> 00:13:14.709 Like I who's like a One of my mentors, I would consider him. 00:13:15.900 --> 00:13:17.720 I didn't find like the life coach school. 00:13:17.720 --> 00:13:19.690 I didn't know any coaches. 00:13:19.840 --> 00:13:21.810 I just like stumbled on it. 00:13:22.470 --> 00:13:26.960 And so I just was like, I think the best way to do it is to get 00:13:26.960 --> 00:13:30.659 people to say yes, which means it has to be like them helping me. 00:13:30.910 --> 00:13:32.800 Cause I know that people are more inclined to help. 00:13:33.285 --> 00:13:35.314 Then like, Oh, I'll like, I want coaching. 00:13:35.314 --> 00:13:36.564 They don't even know what coaching is. 00:13:36.605 --> 00:13:38.145 I barely knew what coaching was. 00:13:38.194 --> 00:13:38.584 Right. 00:13:38.975 --> 00:13:41.745 And so I positioned it like you're helping me if you jump on this call. 00:13:41.805 --> 00:13:42.814 And I tried to get a hundred. 00:13:42.944 --> 00:13:45.905 I didn't because eventually people were like, how do we keep doing this? 00:13:46.094 --> 00:13:47.265 I want to do this again. 00:13:48.005 --> 00:13:48.904 Can we keep talking? 00:13:48.935 --> 00:13:51.694 And so I got actually got my first like 10 clients. 00:13:51.855 --> 00:13:58.455 One of the reasons you are a fascinating character in my, in 00:13:58.455 --> 00:14:04.585 my mind is that you just said, I didn't have anyone in my ear yet. 00:14:04.645 --> 00:14:09.044 Now, I know you to be a great student of coaching and a student of psychology 00:14:09.044 --> 00:14:11.495 and, and self personal development. 00:14:11.495 --> 00:14:14.134 I know you to be a great student of all these things, but I also know you 00:14:14.134 --> 00:14:17.825 to be a person who is not, I don't think I've said this to you before, 00:14:17.825 --> 00:14:21.555 but you are not in a hurry to join me. 00:14:22.490 --> 00:14:30.469 A particular group, a dogma you, you strike me as more confident than 00:14:30.479 --> 00:14:36.739 most people in your willingness to sort of make your own way through the 00:14:36.739 --> 00:14:39.780 development of your business and your development as a person, as a coach. 00:14:40.525 --> 00:14:40.765 Yeah. 00:14:40.775 --> 00:14:41.894 How did that happen? 00:14:44.515 --> 00:14:47.345 Part of it was like, I've always just been an avid reader. 00:14:47.425 --> 00:14:50.665 So like if you, I'm like looking at my desk right now, like I have a 00:14:50.665 --> 00:14:53.545 book like called Living Untethered. 00:14:53.575 --> 00:14:57.145 I have a book, The Prosperous Coach, which I keep on my desk, but I also have like a 00:14:57.145 --> 00:15:02.395 Buddhism book and a stoic, like the Daily Stoic and Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. 00:15:02.435 --> 00:15:07.195 Like I think I study a lot of different ideas. 00:15:08.285 --> 00:15:10.574 So I don't have a dogma about coaching. 00:15:10.675 --> 00:15:12.655 I think that there's lots of different ways. 00:15:12.685 --> 00:15:15.025 I also came from the world of psychology. 00:15:15.614 --> 00:15:19.805 So I think I was just exposed to a lot of different teachers on personal 00:15:19.805 --> 00:15:22.715 development, self help transformation. 00:15:22.854 --> 00:15:24.824 And so I think that's just kind of how I started. 00:15:25.204 --> 00:15:25.474 Yeah. 00:15:26.944 --> 00:15:32.694 And you, I mean, you seem not to feel any particular FOMO about 00:15:32.724 --> 00:15:35.875 like, you don't know, did you ever? 00:15:37.925 --> 00:15:44.105 Do you ever have FOMO about, Oh, my peers are joining this thing or my friends, or 00:15:44.855 --> 00:15:49.484 is there ever a sense of, in you of like, I don't really want to miss that or, or 00:15:49.484 --> 00:15:51.665 do you just feel very sort of at rest? 00:15:52.945 --> 00:15:53.385 I'm at rest. 00:15:53.395 --> 00:15:54.234 I'm at peace. 00:15:55.974 --> 00:16:00.765 I don't join things even for like the I've joined, like I've been a mastermind, 00:16:00.795 --> 00:16:02.555 but I joined for very specific reasons. 00:16:02.564 --> 00:16:05.154 I didn't join to be part of the club, if that makes sense. 00:16:05.265 --> 00:16:05.525 Yeah. 00:16:05.774 --> 00:16:10.324 Or like to be part of the group I joined for specific reasons for 00:16:10.324 --> 00:16:12.154 my business development, right? 00:16:12.154 --> 00:16:14.155 It's like not social. 00:16:15.485 --> 00:16:16.065 Yes. 00:16:18.695 --> 00:16:19.185 It's interesting. 00:16:19.195 --> 00:16:19.975 It's not typical. 00:16:20.005 --> 00:16:20.875 In my experience. 00:16:21.225 --> 00:16:21.975 It's not typical. 00:16:22.825 --> 00:16:23.095 Okay. 00:16:23.095 --> 00:16:25.065 I'm going to go back to the realtor at the t ball game. 00:16:27.135 --> 00:16:29.595 So in the moment that you're talking with her, you're able to stay 00:16:29.625 --> 00:16:31.065 out of a transactional attitude. 00:16:31.075 --> 00:16:36.735 You're not viewing her as dollar signs in the intervening week 00:16:37.774 --> 00:16:39.045 before the next t ball game. 00:16:39.115 --> 00:16:40.134 Is she on your mind? 00:16:40.500 --> 00:16:43.840 Do you have any inkling to reach out to her or, or has she, 00:16:44.199 --> 00:16:45.520 has she gone from your mind? 00:16:46.539 --> 00:16:49.840 Yeah, I got busy, but my husband brought it up a couple of times cause he doesn't 00:16:49.849 --> 00:16:51.679 know, he doesn't really know what I do. 00:16:51.679 --> 00:16:56.790 So he sees this, this like opportunity and he's like, well, 00:16:56.790 --> 00:16:57.540 are you going to talk to her? 00:16:57.719 --> 00:16:59.729 And I'm like, like, what do you mean? 00:16:59.739 --> 00:17:01.830 He's like, are you gonna like message her on Instagram or something? 00:17:01.840 --> 00:17:02.509 And I'm like, no. 00:17:03.009 --> 00:17:05.469 No, no, I'm not. 00:17:07.180 --> 00:17:09.810 I'll see her at T ball and if she asks about it, we'll talk about it again. 00:17:11.860 --> 00:17:12.670 Because I think. 00:17:13.010 --> 00:17:15.240 One, the other thing that I think you and I both have in common is 00:17:15.240 --> 00:17:19.349 like, I study myself like I'm very interested in why, how, like, why 00:17:19.349 --> 00:17:21.050 do I hire the people that I hire? 00:17:21.060 --> 00:17:22.970 Why do I study the things that I studied? 00:17:23.600 --> 00:17:25.370 Why did I hire my first coach? 00:17:25.380 --> 00:17:26.720 Why did I hire my next coach? 00:17:26.779 --> 00:17:29.100 Like, and pressure. 00:17:29.930 --> 00:17:31.419 That's never why I bought something. 00:17:31.419 --> 00:17:33.250 And if I ever feel pressure, I'm out. 00:17:33.915 --> 00:17:34.165 Yeah. 00:17:34.165 --> 00:17:37.875 So I never want to give the experience of pressure to a potential or 00:17:37.915 --> 00:17:40.595 just, I wouldn't even like the word potential client, like even just a 00:17:40.595 --> 00:17:42.225 connection, a person and a friend. 00:17:43.125 --> 00:17:46.994 So I never really thought about her that week, even the 00:17:46.994 --> 00:17:50.255 phrase potential client colors. 00:17:51.165 --> 00:17:53.915 Your, your view of her, your attitude about her. 00:17:53.915 --> 00:17:58.125 You you've look, I don't think either one of us would say it's the end of 00:17:58.125 --> 00:18:02.455 the world to call someone a potential client, but it may hint at, it may 00:18:02.455 --> 00:18:06.185 hint at a transactional attitude that may not serve the relationship. 00:18:07.024 --> 00:18:07.414 Yeah. 00:18:08.735 --> 00:18:11.115 Well, and if people ask me like which of these people in your 00:18:11.214 --> 00:18:15.725 list is a potential client that wouldn't really resonate with me. 00:18:17.020 --> 00:18:17.840 I'm like, I don't know. 00:18:19.450 --> 00:18:19.730 I don't know. 00:18:19.730 --> 00:18:20.459 Yeah. 00:18:22.540 --> 00:18:23.050 Yes. 00:18:23.060 --> 00:18:27.110 That's actually really, really well said. 00:18:29.379 --> 00:18:31.620 The next week at the T ball game, she brought it back up. 00:18:31.650 --> 00:18:34.050 Were you surprised that she brought it back up? 00:18:35.050 --> 00:18:38.519 I was because in my mind I'm like, she's a busy woman. 00:18:39.529 --> 00:18:41.149 Like it might've been interesting in the moment. 00:18:42.100 --> 00:18:43.980 I also know that emotions. 00:18:44.370 --> 00:18:46.870 Like, it's just interesting how people, what people say when they're 00:18:46.870 --> 00:18:48.460 emotional, like she was excited. 00:18:48.580 --> 00:18:48.760 Right. 00:18:48.760 --> 00:18:49.860 She had just finished this book. 00:18:50.330 --> 00:18:53.080 She met a real life coach, which is so funny because when we get in the 00:18:53.080 --> 00:18:56.090 coaching industry, we think we're such like a dime a dozen, but that's 00:18:56.090 --> 00:18:57.930 not how other people experience us. 00:18:57.979 --> 00:18:58.229 Right. 00:18:58.240 --> 00:18:58.989 They're like, wow. 00:18:59.600 --> 00:19:00.389 So interesting. 00:19:00.949 --> 00:19:02.670 And so she, like her emotions are really high. 00:19:02.699 --> 00:19:06.020 So I just didn't really, if I saw her again, I wasn't even going to bring it up. 00:19:06.300 --> 00:19:08.200 Like I was just going to let the conversation roll. 00:19:09.195 --> 00:19:10.355 And it did just roll. 00:19:10.355 --> 00:19:14.165 We eventually, like in the beginning, we were talking about our kids and the game, 00:19:14.345 --> 00:19:15.935 we weren't even talking about business. 00:19:16.865 --> 00:19:17.665 And then she brought it up. 00:19:17.695 --> 00:19:20.084 Like, I can't stop thinking about our conversation that we had last week. 00:19:23.185 --> 00:19:27.065 You said you invited her then to a coaching call, a coaching interaction. 00:19:27.135 --> 00:19:28.315 And I know you're a. 00:19:29.195 --> 00:19:34.085 I don't know if at the time you were, you were using a prosperous coach kind 00:19:34.085 --> 00:19:37.655 of approach, but I do know that when you interact with people, it tends 00:19:37.655 --> 00:19:39.474 to be purely a coaching interaction. 00:19:39.475 --> 00:19:40.885 So then you set up a time to talk with her. 00:19:40.885 --> 00:19:42.034 Did you do that on zoom? 00:19:42.034 --> 00:19:43.425 How long did it last? 00:19:43.635 --> 00:19:46.414 What was the content of the conversation? 00:19:47.125 --> 00:19:47.565 Yeah. 00:19:47.574 --> 00:19:55.145 So, yeah, I've been doing the prosperous coach approach since like 28, 2019, I 00:19:55.395 --> 00:19:59.095 think is when I read the book and I just, it just like landed for me really well. 00:19:59.625 --> 00:20:03.565 So I like, like a lot of my clients, I invented a program for her on the spot. 00:20:03.575 --> 00:20:05.814 Like I think that this is what would make sense for you. 00:20:07.024 --> 00:20:09.444 The context of the conversation was about her self concept as a 00:20:09.444 --> 00:20:11.805 luxury real estate agent, fun store. 00:20:11.825 --> 00:20:13.245 That story has a fun ending. 00:20:13.265 --> 00:20:17.085 She like sold 16 million worth of real estate last quarter. 00:20:18.270 --> 00:20:21.380 Luxury real estate, which is cool. 00:20:21.380 --> 00:20:21.780 Right. 00:20:22.170 --> 00:20:22.710 Very cool. 00:20:24.590 --> 00:20:27.420 Not like, I don't think I wouldn't like be like because of my coaching, 00:20:27.440 --> 00:20:30.999 but like there was a happy, we're not coaching together anymore, but there 00:20:30.999 --> 00:20:35.149 was a period of time where like, it felt very daunting to her to embody 00:20:35.230 --> 00:20:37.750 or be a luxury real estate agent. 00:20:38.480 --> 00:20:39.800 And that's really what was on her mind. 00:20:39.800 --> 00:20:40.550 That's what she wanted. 00:20:40.550 --> 00:20:43.830 And so that was the whole context of the conversation of what would that be like? 00:20:44.300 --> 00:20:45.930 What connections do you have? 00:20:46.820 --> 00:20:48.829 What would you have to stop believing about yourself? 00:20:49.025 --> 00:20:50.815 very coachy type questions. 00:20:51.855 --> 00:20:54.765 And I think it really challenged her. 00:20:55.265 --> 00:21:00.035 I think a lot of people who aren't in personal development, at least 00:21:00.035 --> 00:21:03.525 the way coaches tend to be, like that, just that conversation alone 00:21:03.535 --> 00:21:05.024 was very mind blowing for her. 00:21:05.674 --> 00:21:08.175 Almost no one is doing this kind of introspection. 00:21:10.190 --> 00:21:17.040 I mean, almost no one, and it's, I'm, I'm very curious as, as to why I don't 00:21:17.040 --> 00:21:19.840 go to the idea that like, Oh, because people are broken or because they're 00:21:19.840 --> 00:21:23.900 bad or so I'm not sure why no one's statistically speaking, almost no one 00:21:23.900 --> 00:21:26.899 is doing this kind of introspection, but when you invite them to it and 00:21:26.899 --> 00:21:29.009 they're prepared, it is mind blowing. 00:21:29.050 --> 00:21:32.640 I find it mind blowing and I been doing it for years with my own coaches. 00:21:32.880 --> 00:21:34.200 It's still mind blowing. 00:21:36.465 --> 00:21:41.335 In the, in the coach, in that initial coaching interaction, it's 00:21:41.335 --> 00:21:45.265 okay if you don't remember details, but for you, how does that, how 00:21:45.265 --> 00:21:49.974 does that individual interaction evolve and how does it sort of end? 00:21:49.985 --> 00:21:53.185 What is the last five or 10 minutes of that phone call sound like, 00:21:53.195 --> 00:21:54.375 or that zoom call sound like? 00:21:55.494 --> 00:21:55.984 Yeah. 00:21:56.074 --> 00:22:00.085 So I think the way that I operate is I'm not going to. 00:22:00.510 --> 00:22:01.040 Sell. 00:22:01.070 --> 00:22:04.880 I think that was another important thing that I don't even get on coaching 00:22:04.880 --> 00:22:08.360 calls or some people call them consult calls with like the intention to sell. 00:22:08.360 --> 00:22:12.199 I don't always make an offer on those kinds of calls depending 00:22:12.200 --> 00:22:13.629 on how it goes because. 00:22:14.575 --> 00:22:20.835 I don't like that's, that's a pretty big assumption but like they want to 00:22:20.835 --> 00:22:23.974 talk about working together because all I did was invite her to a more formal 00:22:23.975 --> 00:22:26.835 coaching call where we could talk more. 00:22:29.125 --> 00:22:33.194 I had, I kind of, I had like an inkling that she might ask what it would be 00:22:33.194 --> 00:22:36.655 like just because, because of our other two previous conversations. 00:22:37.345 --> 00:22:41.225 So we talked, you know, about her self concept, what she wants. 00:22:42.520 --> 00:22:44.790 Kind of like in the prosperous coach, he talks about like the default 00:22:44.790 --> 00:22:46.420 future versus the possible future. 00:22:46.440 --> 00:22:51.259 And I made a case for her possible future and just was really honest about what I 00:22:51.260 --> 00:22:56.159 saw that like, I'm like, I think you're already this person because she was, 00:22:58.220 --> 00:23:00.059 and so I think some of her thoughts. 00:23:00.535 --> 00:23:03.775 About her doubt and just, you know, who am I to do that? 00:23:04.755 --> 00:23:07.325 There's already people doing that in Utah kinds of things. 00:23:07.885 --> 00:23:11.464 You know, another, another coach might not have wanted to tell her 00:23:11.464 --> 00:23:12.815 that she's already that person. 00:23:13.475 --> 00:23:20.194 Another coach might have wanted to hold that because if I tell her she's 00:23:20.194 --> 00:23:23.915 already that person, maybe she'll decide she doesn't need to coach with me. 00:23:23.915 --> 00:23:29.015 If I, if I somehow plant the seed that she could be, but is not yet that person, 00:23:29.964 --> 00:23:33.865 then, I'm creating an incentive for her to sign up with me, quote unquote. 00:23:33.875 --> 00:23:34.055 Yeah. 00:23:35.135 --> 00:23:35.905 You didn't do that. 00:23:35.935 --> 00:23:36.965 You didn't hold that back. 00:23:37.155 --> 00:23:37.555 Why not? 00:23:37.585 --> 00:23:39.695 I think I caught something that you said. 00:23:39.765 --> 00:23:41.914 You said she might not feel the need to hire me. 00:23:41.915 --> 00:23:45.435 And that's, I think another strong underlying belief that 00:23:45.435 --> 00:23:47.125 I have that people can feel. 00:23:47.144 --> 00:23:50.015 I think you have this too, is that I don't need her to sign. 00:23:50.155 --> 00:23:52.115 I actually don't think anyone needs to hire me. 00:23:52.685 --> 00:23:53.045 Yeah. 00:23:54.715 --> 00:23:55.395 No one needs a coach. 00:23:55.395 --> 00:23:56.035 So she doesn't. 00:23:56.515 --> 00:23:57.695 No one needs a coach. 00:23:57.925 --> 00:24:00.055 No one needs a coach, but some people want one. 00:24:01.395 --> 00:24:05.865 And I think the people who get the most out of it just want it., I give 00:24:05.865 --> 00:24:07.365 credit to Rich Litvin for that line. 00:24:07.365 --> 00:24:10.255 I don't know if I'm quoting him correctly, but I've walked around for 00:24:10.255 --> 00:24:13.425 years now with the idea that no one needs a coach, but some people want one. 00:24:13.804 --> 00:24:15.085 And that is sufficient. 00:24:15.345 --> 00:24:19.435 I can, around that one idea, I can build an amazing practice, amazing 00:24:19.435 --> 00:24:22.395 relationships, be part of amazing results. 00:24:22.800 --> 00:24:23.050 Yep. 00:24:23.330 --> 00:24:26.380 Another thing you said was I'm not going to say she did that because of 00:24:26.380 --> 00:24:29.440 my coaching and I know you mean that you don't think she sold 16 million 00:24:29.440 --> 00:24:34.320 in the last quarter because of your coaching, but you did participate. 00:24:35.170 --> 00:24:35.610 Yeah. 00:24:35.650 --> 00:24:38.319 So I, but like, I think of coaching like a tool, right? 00:24:38.319 --> 00:24:41.460 Like if someone picks up a hammer and builds a house, the 00:24:41.460 --> 00:24:42.850 hammer didn't build the house. 00:24:44.160 --> 00:24:45.320 The person picked up a tool. 00:24:45.350 --> 00:24:49.170 She was a, she made it happen because partially because she 00:24:49.170 --> 00:24:50.320 hired a coach to help her. 00:24:50.885 --> 00:24:53.135 Partially because she already had the innate skill set. 00:24:53.135 --> 00:24:54.715 She takes great care of her clients. 00:24:54.725 --> 00:24:57.845 She was already giving people a luxury experience long before she was ever 00:24:57.845 --> 00:24:59.785 a luxury, luxury real estate agent. 00:25:00.495 --> 00:25:00.875 Right. 00:25:01.905 --> 00:25:06.064 She already like saw, like, I would call it wealth consciousness. 00:25:06.065 --> 00:25:07.074 Like she already had it. 00:25:07.074 --> 00:25:09.685 Like I wasn't lying to her on the call where I was like, I 00:25:09.685 --> 00:25:10.695 already see you as this person. 00:25:10.705 --> 00:25:13.525 Like that was just me reflecting something that I saw. 00:25:13.535 --> 00:25:15.125 It wasn't like paying lip service. 00:25:16.405 --> 00:25:17.725 And so it was already in her. 00:25:17.725 --> 00:25:20.790 So to me, it's not surprising that she's It's killing it. 00:25:20.990 --> 00:25:21.870 She already had it. 00:25:25.670 --> 00:25:26.300 It's fascinating. 00:25:27.370 --> 00:25:31.960 It's it's so, is it even, I was about to say it's counterintuitive, 00:25:32.620 --> 00:25:33.700 but I'm actually not sure. 00:25:33.700 --> 00:25:34.740 I think it is counterintuitive. 00:25:34.740 --> 00:25:40.189 I think it's intuitive, but most of what we do acts against that intuition. 00:25:41.050 --> 00:25:41.470 I agree. 00:25:43.629 --> 00:25:44.850 Why do you think that happens? 00:25:45.219 --> 00:25:49.060 Why do you think we're so prone to going against that inner peace 00:25:49.060 --> 00:25:52.590 that drives your way of being with her and with other clients? 00:25:56.485 --> 00:25:57.295 That's a good question. 00:25:57.295 --> 00:26:01.665 I think partially what we talked about earlier about being students, a lot of 00:26:01.665 --> 00:26:08.095 coaches are students and they listen to one piece of advice and take it as law. 00:26:09.385 --> 00:26:12.405 Whereas like, I think you and I both are having a healthy skepticism about 00:26:12.435 --> 00:26:15.135 things where it's like, nothing's law. 00:26:15.195 --> 00:26:16.965 So does that fit for me? 00:26:17.695 --> 00:26:19.455 Like there are laws, but not in what we do. 00:26:20.145 --> 00:26:20.405 Right. 00:26:21.765 --> 00:26:25.825 And so like, do I have to overcome objections? 00:26:26.645 --> 00:26:28.655 Should I not coach on a consult call? 00:26:29.094 --> 00:26:30.425 Do I have to sell right away? 00:26:30.445 --> 00:26:33.605 All of those things that I'm like, those aren't alignment. 00:26:33.655 --> 00:26:35.275 Those don't feel good in my body. 00:26:35.935 --> 00:26:39.875 To do that, it feels unnatural to me and I think a lot of what people feel 00:26:39.875 --> 00:26:42.235 like they need to do it's unnatural to them and they're like, well, it's wrong 00:26:42.265 --> 00:26:46.535 what the way that I feel naturally is wrong because so and so said this or 00:26:46.535 --> 00:26:50.334 this is how it worked for so and so instead of like checking in and like, 00:26:50.335 --> 00:26:51.455 how does this feel to me, I think. 00:26:51.965 --> 00:26:54.135 I've always done this was what feels right to me. 00:26:55.975 --> 00:27:00.725 An unfortunate thing can happen in this world of personal development 00:27:00.725 --> 00:27:05.284 of coaching can be that people in positions of leadership, people in 00:27:05.284 --> 00:27:09.924 positions of influence, maybe in large part because of their own anxieties. 00:27:10.770 --> 00:27:14.940 And feeling like they have to get other quote, get other people results. 00:27:15.410 --> 00:27:19.329 They bring urgency and anxiety into what they're teaching. 00:27:20.820 --> 00:27:24.330 Also, I do have an opinion that with training programs in particular, 00:27:25.350 --> 00:27:29.599 many training programs, we have to build complexity into them. 00:27:29.600 --> 00:27:33.860 So there's a reason to buy them because if I want to create a training 00:27:33.860 --> 00:27:35.850 program and the training program is. 00:27:36.575 --> 00:27:41.255 Have conversations, listen to your, as you put it, listen to the feelings in 00:27:41.255 --> 00:27:45.225 your body, trust your intuition repeat. 00:27:46.615 --> 00:27:48.155 It's not much of a training program. 00:27:48.355 --> 00:27:51.775 There's not, there's not, there's, you know, that's a one page ebook. 00:27:51.824 --> 00:27:53.334 It's a one paragraph ebook. 00:27:53.654 --> 00:27:58.064 So sometimes I think complexity comes in because without that complexity, there's. 00:27:58.470 --> 00:28:01.370 There's not much to put into my course that I'm trying to sell 00:28:01.550 --> 00:28:03.250 if I am trying to sell a course. 00:28:03.470 --> 00:28:07.850 Yeah, it's going to justify what I want to charge for it and why it's important. 00:28:08.710 --> 00:28:09.040 Yeah. 00:28:09.079 --> 00:28:14.770 So I can say the three steps I always use or five keys to blah or whatever. 00:28:15.119 --> 00:28:18.819 It's not that I think those courses never have merit or value, but as 00:28:18.829 --> 00:28:23.060 you said, I want to bring a healthy skepticism to it so that I'm always 00:28:23.060 --> 00:28:27.489 staying in tune with my own feelings, my own sense of what's right and natural. 00:28:28.530 --> 00:28:28.790 Yeah. 00:28:28.840 --> 00:28:32.040 And then being very careful about which things I pick up from other people and 00:28:32.050 --> 00:28:34.170 which things I, I just leave on the side. 00:28:35.090 --> 00:28:35.450 Yeah. 00:28:35.730 --> 00:28:38.159 Cause I think that some people don't even have that filter. 00:28:38.159 --> 00:28:41.970 They're just like, well, this person said this, so this must be the way. 00:28:44.940 --> 00:28:51.790 I had the most fascinating client client call yesterday, where would be thoughtful 00:28:51.790 --> 00:28:53.940 about how he share any of these details. 00:28:54.440 --> 00:28:56.680 I was on a call with a marketing. 00:28:58.025 --> 00:29:01.905 Client's marketing person and the client and the marketing, the client 00:29:01.905 --> 00:29:05.145 was referring to another business and saying that business seems amazing 00:29:05.645 --> 00:29:09.924 and the marketing person did what I've done so many times as the CFO guy, 00:29:10.325 --> 00:29:18.565 he said, look, I've had conversations with that team from that company and. 00:29:19.325 --> 00:29:21.285 Basically, not all that glitters is gold. 00:29:22.015 --> 00:29:26.065 What it looks like on the outside is not what's going on on the inside. 00:29:26.265 --> 00:29:30.974 And he said to her, your business is stronger, healthier, and more 00:29:30.974 --> 00:29:33.405 profitable than that business. 00:29:34.275 --> 00:29:39.185 He basically said it's a Lamborghini body on a Toyota Corolla, basically. 00:29:40.635 --> 00:29:44.355 And so it's so easy for me included. 00:29:44.355 --> 00:29:46.025 I think I, I think I've developed. 00:29:47.005 --> 00:29:51.875 You know, my ability to to not fall into this trap anymore, but it's so easy to 00:29:51.875 --> 00:29:54.725 fall into the trap of it looks right. 00:29:54.755 --> 00:29:56.025 It sounds right. 00:29:56.545 --> 00:29:58.035 It must be right. 00:29:58.135 --> 00:30:01.224 It's sort of ticking all my lower brain boxes. 00:30:03.300 --> 00:30:04.390 And so it must be right. 00:30:06.060 --> 00:30:08.420 And I'm trying to, and I know you are too. 00:30:08.420 --> 00:30:12.360 I'm trying to get people to just raise their sensitivity and their awareness 00:30:12.360 --> 00:30:13.860 of what really might be going on. 00:30:16.730 --> 00:30:19.620 Well, and I think one of the questions that I think you and I talked about 00:30:19.620 --> 00:30:24.615 this when we were at the conference, but like, Do you want to be a CEO? 00:30:24.635 --> 00:30:26.895 I don't know if we use these words, but did you want to be 00:30:26.895 --> 00:30:31.775 a CEO or did you want to have powerful conversations with people? 00:30:32.855 --> 00:30:35.965 Not that CEOs don't, it's just their job title is different, right? 00:30:36.025 --> 00:30:41.535 A training business is a lot of CEO work versus like one of the 00:30:41.535 --> 00:30:42.905 things that I got into this for. 00:30:42.915 --> 00:30:45.415 And one of the things that I love about it is having powerful 00:30:45.455 --> 00:30:47.035 conversations with real people. 00:30:47.315 --> 00:30:47.805 One to one. 00:30:50.735 --> 00:30:54.125 And if that's your goal, there's, there's not a whole lot to it. 00:30:54.405 --> 00:30:58.045 I mean, there's a lot to it, but the steps can be written on a, 00:30:58.065 --> 00:30:59.485 on a three by five note card. 00:30:59.485 --> 00:31:00.395 Pretty much. 00:31:02.694 --> 00:31:04.924 How do you think I you're, you're a mom. 00:31:04.925 --> 00:31:06.195 You said you have three girls. 00:31:06.274 --> 00:31:07.345 Your kids are young. 00:31:07.364 --> 00:31:07.995 Are they not? 00:31:08.024 --> 00:31:08.324 Yeah. 00:31:08.765 --> 00:31:10.045 Yeah, six, four, and two. 00:31:11.075 --> 00:31:13.825 I know you're very thoughtful and intentional about your 00:31:13.825 --> 00:31:15.485 work day and your work week. 00:31:16.925 --> 00:31:19.625 Will you describe it and your, and your thoughts around it? 00:31:20.735 --> 00:31:21.135 Yeah. 00:31:21.135 --> 00:31:25.854 So I, I only work, like I have a fuller day Monday and Wednesday, 00:31:26.405 --> 00:31:30.424 but like even on my work days, I go to pick them up from school. 00:31:30.634 --> 00:31:32.045 So it's like, I'm not working the whole day. 00:31:32.805 --> 00:31:33.935 I do lunch with them. 00:31:35.435 --> 00:31:36.975 That was always important to me. 00:31:37.005 --> 00:31:38.525 So I work Mondays and Wednesdays. 00:31:40.294 --> 00:31:41.295 This week was weird. 00:31:41.825 --> 00:31:43.095 I have you and then I have another client. 00:31:43.155 --> 00:31:44.335 Anyway, this is an anomaly. 00:31:44.365 --> 00:31:47.135 This is not super common, but my nanny's here today. 00:31:48.175 --> 00:31:52.405 And I'm always mindful of the lifestyle, which is why I love one on one coaching. 00:31:52.405 --> 00:31:56.515 I think most people, it's like you get to decide when you work and 00:31:56.515 --> 00:32:00.414 when you don't, who you take and who you don't like, what vacations 00:32:00.424 --> 00:32:01.685 you take and you know what I mean? 00:32:01.705 --> 00:32:02.585 The freedom. 00:32:03.055 --> 00:32:04.315 So that was always important to me. 00:32:04.315 --> 00:32:05.105 And I think I backed. 00:32:05.260 --> 00:32:06.540 Into coaching that way. 00:32:06.540 --> 00:32:11.880 Cause when I started coaching, I had basically a two year old, not even a two 00:32:11.880 --> 00:32:14.730 year old, like a one year old and a baby. 00:32:16.619 --> 00:32:19.310 So you've come through, you've come through, I mean, you've got 00:32:19.320 --> 00:32:23.560 toddler, you've got infant, you've had a pregnancy, another infant, 00:32:23.579 --> 00:32:25.609 now toddler, now a kindergartner. 00:32:25.799 --> 00:32:28.849 You've been through all these phases while building your business. 00:32:29.370 --> 00:32:29.690 Yeah. 00:32:30.500 --> 00:32:31.710 How was that for you? 00:32:31.800 --> 00:32:33.550 , where did you feel friction? 00:32:33.550 --> 00:32:34.830 Where did you feel tension? 00:32:36.230 --> 00:32:37.030 What was it like? 00:32:38.460 --> 00:32:44.890 I think the tension is between like my ambition and my like, almost like the 00:32:44.899 --> 00:32:50.010 Zen I'm like a very like Zen person's like, like my desire to live a very 00:32:50.010 --> 00:32:53.260 simple, innately beautiful life. 00:32:53.310 --> 00:32:54.420 That's like kind of private. 00:32:54.460 --> 00:32:55.920 I've always liked that. 00:32:56.430 --> 00:32:59.790 And so the tension was like, how do achieve my dreams? 00:33:00.230 --> 00:33:01.690 And like do what I want to do. 00:33:01.740 --> 00:33:02.920 I thought I was going to be a therapist. 00:33:02.920 --> 00:33:04.490 I don't know if we talked about that, but I always thought I 00:33:04.500 --> 00:33:05.940 would be like working with people. 00:33:07.070 --> 00:33:10.459 And I wanted a career that I could be home with my kids. 00:33:10.470 --> 00:33:12.889 So like I work probably like 15 hours a week or so. 00:33:14.560 --> 00:33:19.129 Which I like sometimes more, sometimes less depending. 00:33:20.220 --> 00:33:23.310 But I always like backed into my business from a lifestyle perspective. 00:33:24.370 --> 00:33:25.010 If that makes sense. 00:33:25.220 --> 00:33:25.560 Yeah. 00:33:25.560 --> 00:33:29.199 You had your, your lifestyle, your, your values first. 00:33:29.840 --> 00:33:30.110 Yeah. 00:33:30.130 --> 00:33:32.310 Your, your business goals second. 00:33:33.825 --> 00:33:37.215 But you do talk about some tension between some tension in there 00:33:37.245 --> 00:33:38.785 because you are an ambitious person. 00:33:38.785 --> 00:33:41.265 I, I actually think you're more ambitious than I am. 00:33:41.265 --> 00:33:44.125 I don't know that we've really talked about longterm goals, but I, I think you 00:33:44.135 --> 00:33:48.834 have energy for growth and creation and yeah, not that I don't, but I do think 00:33:48.834 --> 00:33:50.044 you might have a little more than I do. 00:33:50.054 --> 00:33:55.765 How, how do you, how do you maintain your peace of mind with that tension? 00:33:56.915 --> 00:34:02.355 Yeah, that's why I got, I do like more deep spiritual type work where it's like 00:34:02.385 --> 00:34:03.785 making peace with the present moment. 00:34:03.825 --> 00:34:07.565 This is why, like, I started studying mindfulness and meditation 00:34:07.565 --> 00:34:12.015 because I needed to calm my mind because on hyperdrive, right? 00:34:12.015 --> 00:34:13.835 Like I could think about all the things I want to create, but at the 00:34:13.835 --> 00:34:17.075 end of the day, I also know that that Like there isn't better than 00:34:17.075 --> 00:34:22.625 here, you know, lots of coachy speak, but it's not, it's truly not. 00:34:22.685 --> 00:34:26.105 And so I think of it more like a video game that, that 00:34:26.145 --> 00:34:27.595 metaphor is very helpful to me. 00:34:27.635 --> 00:34:31.374 Like, it's like a game I want to play business is something that's interesting 00:34:31.375 --> 00:34:34.424 to me, but it's also not everything. 00:34:34.685 --> 00:34:35.364 And it doesn't. 00:34:35.715 --> 00:34:42.255 It doesn't come first, it's, it's second, and I have to do 00:34:42.255 --> 00:34:43.765 a lot of work to remember that. 00:34:46.135 --> 00:34:51.375 Yeah,, because of the culture we live in, there will always be a 00:34:51.375 --> 00:34:58.192 lot of external inputs telling you to go faster, do more, be bigger. 00:34:58.192 --> 00:35:01.521 Those inputs never see, they never cease, they never get quiet. 00:35:01.521 --> 00:35:04.849 So there's sort of a, like brushing your teeth and flossing. 00:35:06.010 --> 00:35:10.170 Nature to maintaining inner peace, remembering what I'm doing, why 00:35:10.170 --> 00:35:14.550 I'm doing it right now that there are seasons to these things. 00:35:14.550 --> 00:35:16.860 And this is one season and there will be another season. 00:35:17.529 --> 00:35:19.420 You're being honest and admitting that you're not 00:35:19.430 --> 00:35:20.940 completely solved on this topic. 00:35:20.960 --> 00:35:22.709 You have to do maintenance work. 00:35:23.299 --> 00:35:24.379 I feel the same way. 00:35:24.379 --> 00:35:28.570 I have, I have to sort of my coach calls it recontextualizing. 00:35:28.675 --> 00:35:32.025 I'm constantly recontextualizing. 00:35:32.105 --> 00:35:35.285 I made a keynote presentation, a PowerPoint presentation with 00:35:35.285 --> 00:35:38.595 like six slides and they all have one big sentence on them. 00:35:40.345 --> 00:35:43.875 And I recontextualize with, this is what matters. 00:35:44.690 --> 00:35:47.960 And I go back there because if not, I have this ability to spiral out of 00:35:47.960 --> 00:35:52.090 control with a million ideas and a bunch of anxiety about those ideas. 00:35:52.090 --> 00:35:56.760 And then, you know, thanks to therapy, coaching and meditation, I have a 00:35:56.760 --> 00:36:02.200 lot more physical sensitivity to how my body reacts, that anxiety, 00:36:02.200 --> 00:36:06.240 and it's a signal that tells me it's time to go meditate or go for a walk. 00:36:06.250 --> 00:36:08.920 It's time to look at your keynote slides because I don't 00:36:08.920 --> 00:36:09.980 think that work has ever done. 00:36:10.720 --> 00:36:11.070 Yeah. 00:36:11.940 --> 00:36:13.580 And that's why I keep paying for coaching. 00:36:13.580 --> 00:36:14.560 And someone was like, well, what? 00:36:15.210 --> 00:36:16.840 Like, what, what do you think will happen if like your 00:36:16.840 --> 00:36:18.170 clients don't need you anymore? 00:36:18.190 --> 00:36:21.650 I'm like, it's not about needing, it's like, it's that continual, like 00:36:22.020 --> 00:36:25.260 the reason coaching stays valuable is because I'm still living my life. 00:36:26.090 --> 00:36:26.820 It doesn't end. 00:36:26.860 --> 00:36:27.079 Right. 00:36:27.079 --> 00:36:29.090 And so like brushing your teeth and flossing. 00:36:29.119 --> 00:36:30.050 I love that metaphor. 00:36:30.050 --> 00:36:34.510 It's not that I need it or like, I'm going to get go crazy without it. 00:36:34.510 --> 00:36:38.980 It's just like, I like how I live when I'm doing self reflection when I'm evaluated 00:36:39.030 --> 00:36:44.720 my values and deciding consciously to live my life instead of letting whoever. 00:36:45.425 --> 00:36:48.235 dictate or sell me on an idea that I didn't even want. 00:36:48.245 --> 00:36:53.115 And I think that happens a lot where we get sold an idea without really like 00:36:53.115 --> 00:36:56.075 running it through our own filtering system of like, is that even what I want? 00:36:56.085 --> 00:36:57.134 Is that the lifestyle I even want? 00:36:57.135 --> 00:36:58.415 Is that the business I even want? 00:37:01.745 --> 00:37:05.925 I love how you always come back to this idea of not needing it when we 00:37:05.925 --> 00:37:08.505 were at the, we were at the thing in Arizona together and you were 00:37:08.545 --> 00:37:13.225 teaching so clearly the principle of not being in a place of need. 00:37:14.055 --> 00:37:14.425 Yeah. 00:37:14.585 --> 00:37:15.595 It's so powerful. 00:37:15.605 --> 00:37:18.965 You don't need your clients and it's just as powerful to say they don't 00:37:18.965 --> 00:37:20.545 need you, which we touched on earlier. 00:37:20.865 --> 00:37:26.565 But something I hear coaches saying sometimes is, Oh, my client told me 00:37:26.565 --> 00:37:28.395 they couldn't have done it without me. 00:37:29.825 --> 00:37:35.975 And I will push back on that and say, your clients can and will do it without you. 00:37:36.895 --> 00:37:38.055 That's fine. 00:37:38.195 --> 00:37:42.805 You are fortunate enough to get to participate in their process in whatever 00:37:42.805 --> 00:37:44.755 way is beneficial, beneficial to them. 00:37:45.085 --> 00:37:46.075 They can do it without you. 00:37:46.075 --> 00:37:47.175 They will do it without you. 00:37:47.205 --> 00:37:47.935 They don't need you. 00:37:47.935 --> 00:37:48.785 You don't need them. 00:37:49.075 --> 00:37:52.995 All of this is coming from a place of desire and possibility, not lack, 00:37:52.995 --> 00:37:55.415 not need, not can't, none of it. 00:37:55.655 --> 00:37:55.945 Yep. 00:37:55.945 --> 00:37:57.365 Or codependency. 00:37:57.435 --> 00:37:57.815 Yeah. 00:37:58.115 --> 00:38:01.725 In fact, when I hear one of my clients say, couldn't have done it without you. 00:38:01.785 --> 00:38:02.275 I'm like. 00:38:03.225 --> 00:38:03.555 Hmm. 00:38:05.195 --> 00:38:07.455 How did I let that, how did that come about? 00:38:07.475 --> 00:38:09.605 You know, it's almost like something, it's like a red flag. 00:38:09.615 --> 00:38:11.195 I'm like, okay, we need to talk about this. 00:38:12.255 --> 00:38:15.405 It doesn't happen often, but when it does, I'm like, what did I miss that? 00:38:15.405 --> 00:38:18.915 I helped her see that she's the powerful creator in her life. 00:38:18.945 --> 00:38:19.805 She's doing this. 00:38:20.785 --> 00:38:21.815 That's a great point. 00:38:22.045 --> 00:38:23.145 I think that's a really great point. 00:38:23.145 --> 00:38:27.075 I will tell you that the way I've learned, I've just practiced a, an instant reframe. 00:38:27.425 --> 00:38:31.305 If a client ever tells me I couldn't have done it without you in my head, I just 00:38:31.305 --> 00:38:33.805 say, that's their way of saying thank you. 00:38:34.445 --> 00:38:34.895 Yes. 00:38:35.125 --> 00:38:36.045 That's a good reframe. 00:38:36.775 --> 00:38:38.865 Because I believe that they're saying thank you. 00:38:38.945 --> 00:38:42.675 And I can say you're welcome and still not believe that they quote, 00:38:42.695 --> 00:38:45.184 couldn't have done it without that. 00:38:47.045 --> 00:38:47.625 I want to. 00:38:47.965 --> 00:38:51.295 And maybe our last few minutes here, just, I just want to go on a little curiosity 00:38:51.725 --> 00:38:55.565 path with you because you explore a lot of different business models. 00:38:55.575 --> 00:39:00.825 You're an experimenter and I know you have stuff going on with potential for groups. 00:39:01.530 --> 00:39:01.750 Yep. 00:39:02.960 --> 00:39:09.030 And I'm curious just to hear you free associate around the idea of one on 00:39:09.030 --> 00:39:12.170 one versus small groups or big groups. 00:39:12.170 --> 00:39:13.210 Just whatever comes to your mind. 00:39:13.210 --> 00:39:13.740 I want to hear it. 00:39:14.940 --> 00:39:15.310 Yeah. 00:39:15.310 --> 00:39:18.720 So I've tried a lot and I think we can laugh about our, you 00:39:18.720 --> 00:39:20.320 know, past mistakes and failures. 00:39:20.960 --> 00:39:24.120 One of the things I tried was like a low, very low ticket membership. 00:39:24.710 --> 00:39:25.410 And. 00:39:25.830 --> 00:39:29.420 Didn't work out to put it to make it simple. 00:39:30.290 --> 00:39:32.450 But I do think it's a different way of thinking. 00:39:32.600 --> 00:39:35.330 I think one of the things I'm experimenting with right now 00:39:35.335 --> 00:39:36.860 is selling my group program. 00:39:37.010 --> 00:39:38.210 Like I sell one-on-one. 00:39:39.580 --> 00:39:39.700 Oh, yes. 00:39:39.730 --> 00:39:42.280 Which has been very good for me. 00:39:42.460 --> 00:39:43.330 Say more about this. 00:39:44.340 --> 00:39:48.240 So like I have a consult to use that, like, I didn't call it that, 00:39:48.240 --> 00:39:49.680 but to use a word that everyone knows. 00:39:49.680 --> 00:39:51.630 Like I have a consult on Monday with someone who's like, I'm 00:39:51.630 --> 00:39:53.760 considering joining the the Matrix. 00:39:53.760 --> 00:39:54.660 Can we have a call? 00:39:54.660 --> 00:39:55.590 And I'm like, yes. 00:39:56.395 --> 00:39:59.485 Because that's like my intention is actually to like have a call 00:39:59.485 --> 00:40:01.785 with people about the group. 00:40:01.985 --> 00:40:04.525 It's going to be slower and that's fine. 00:40:04.535 --> 00:40:05.645 I'm not going to do launches. 00:40:06.165 --> 00:40:10.335 I'm not going to do like a lot of things that people typically think of when 00:40:10.335 --> 00:40:11.905 they think of like a scaled program. 00:40:12.315 --> 00:40:15.925 I'm also capping my program so I won't take unlimited amount of people. 00:40:15.995 --> 00:40:17.375 When I hit 40, I close it. 00:40:18.485 --> 00:40:19.985 Why are you okay with it? 00:40:20.225 --> 00:40:22.365 Why are you okay with going, it going slower? 00:40:22.365 --> 00:40:25.645 And why are you, and why are you choosing not to do launches? 00:40:26.925 --> 00:40:30.945 I did launches and they work like that's the thing I think that is 00:40:31.355 --> 00:40:35.505 interesting is like the psychology of marketing is very powerful. 00:40:36.255 --> 00:40:39.555 And so I got really interested in because marketing is just applied human behavior. 00:40:39.615 --> 00:40:40.005 Right. 00:40:40.475 --> 00:40:43.995 And so I think marketing is fascinating, but also like you have to know, 00:40:44.355 --> 00:40:45.525 I heard this from Dan Kennedy. 00:40:45.535 --> 00:40:47.995 He says, you have to know which side of the cash register you're on. 00:40:49.285 --> 00:40:52.605 And that really blew my mind because I realized like we can 00:40:52.605 --> 00:40:54.585 be influenced by marketers. 00:40:55.140 --> 00:40:58.270 To give them money, but we can also be on the cash register of 00:40:58.290 --> 00:40:59.560 getting people to give us money. 00:40:59.940 --> 00:41:01.680 But do you like that whole scenario? 00:41:01.720 --> 00:41:03.990 Do you, do I like my reasons for marketing? 00:41:04.560 --> 00:41:09.160 When you think of marketing, like deploying like urgency and scarcity and 00:41:09.280 --> 00:41:14.720 FOMO and all these powerful, powerful, sometimes manipulative tactics. 00:41:14.770 --> 00:41:16.010 Was I okay with that? 00:41:17.055 --> 00:41:18.025 And my answer was no. 00:41:18.075 --> 00:41:21.435 And that was really, like, I'm actually in a period of deep reflection on 00:41:21.435 --> 00:41:22.735 kind of, because like, it's worked. 00:41:23.435 --> 00:41:26.915 I've made a lot of money doing things that I've learned from books and from mentors. 00:41:27.565 --> 00:41:30.155 But is that what resonates with me in my soul? 00:41:30.425 --> 00:41:31.035 And it didn't. 00:41:31.945 --> 00:41:35.365 And so I wanted to, like, immediately apply that into the matrix where 00:41:35.365 --> 00:41:38.185 it's like, if it's a good fit, and it's going to actually benefit you. 00:41:38.640 --> 00:41:39.050 Great. 00:41:39.100 --> 00:41:40.060 I'm here when you're ready. 00:41:40.080 --> 00:41:41.070 I'm not going to push you. 00:41:41.110 --> 00:41:42.450 I'm not going to open it and close it. 00:41:42.470 --> 00:41:43.850 I've done opening and closing it. 00:41:43.860 --> 00:41:46.680 So if you know me and you're listening to this and you're like, but you did it. 00:41:46.710 --> 00:41:47.530 I'm like, yeah, I did. 00:41:48.150 --> 00:41:53.990 I did do open, open and close, but I, I'm, I had to ask myself why, and 00:41:53.990 --> 00:41:56.350 does this actually match my values? 00:41:56.610 --> 00:41:57.800 And that was a hard answer. 00:41:57.800 --> 00:42:01.470 So yeah, it's going to be slower and I'm good with that because 00:42:01.470 --> 00:42:03.310 my business feels good right now. 00:42:03.400 --> 00:42:04.610 It feels good to me. 00:42:06.515 --> 00:42:08.315 I don't know how many different ways to say it. 00:42:08.345 --> 00:42:11.765 And it's okay for us to just keep repeating it, but having a 00:42:11.775 --> 00:42:14.915 business that feels good is winning. 00:42:14.955 --> 00:42:16.625 It is the finish line. 00:42:17.795 --> 00:42:21.695 It doesn't mean we're done growing, experimenting, learning, expanding. 00:42:21.695 --> 00:42:23.655 It doesn't mean that it's the end of any of that. 00:42:23.985 --> 00:42:30.035 It's just the end of anxious striving and worry because my business feels good. 00:42:30.155 --> 00:42:31.835 And that is the victory. 00:42:32.655 --> 00:42:32.995 Yeah. 00:42:33.265 --> 00:42:36.125 And then the tension that you experience isn't growth. 00:42:36.385 --> 00:42:38.615 It's how do I create more sufficiency? 00:42:38.645 --> 00:42:39.885 How do I create more calm? 00:42:40.095 --> 00:42:42.205 That's the tension that we feel and it's different. 00:42:42.315 --> 00:42:46.155 I think it's an inward journey instead of like an outward, 00:42:46.165 --> 00:42:47.305 how can I grow my audience? 00:42:47.305 --> 00:42:48.585 How can I get more people journey? 00:42:49.495 --> 00:42:52.665 And I've always been on that side anyway, the more reflective, 00:42:54.375 --> 00:42:56.195 deeper thinking journey. 00:42:56.195 --> 00:42:59.815 Is there anything else you'd want to tell people? 00:42:59.905 --> 00:43:01.635 Who's whose ear we happen to have today? 00:43:04.145 --> 00:43:08.965 That your mind is as good as anyone else's, that you really can decide what, 00:43:09.195 --> 00:43:12.575 what your business is going to be like for you and that your ideas aren't wrong. 00:43:13.145 --> 00:43:13.765 You should try them. 00:43:14.815 --> 00:43:15.415 That's what I'm saying. 00:43:15.515 --> 00:43:15.905 Try them. 00:43:16.605 --> 00:43:17.485 You should try them. 00:43:17.525 --> 00:43:21.355 And if it means ignoring Mark Butler and Amber Smith, then by all means. 00:43:22.820 --> 00:43:24.330 Go do your thing. 00:43:24.470 --> 00:43:28.820 And when it feels right, pay very close attention to that feeling. 00:43:30.320 --> 00:43:34.400 Where should people, what should people go do right now to, to engage with you? 00:43:36.610 --> 00:43:39.580 They could hang out with me on Instagram at it's Amber 00:43:39.580 --> 00:43:43.070 Smith again, ITS Amber Smith. 00:43:43.150 --> 00:43:44.849 That's probably the best place for people to find me. 00:43:46.130 --> 00:43:46.490 Awesome. 00:43:47.020 --> 00:43:49.640 Well, you know, I I respect you. 00:43:49.660 --> 00:43:51.370 I think you're doing amazing work in the world. 00:43:51.500 --> 00:43:54.370 Glad to have formed a friendship with you. 00:43:55.090 --> 00:43:58.470 And I appreciate you giving time to this to this particular audience right now. 00:43:59.110 --> 00:43:59.770 Yeah. 00:43:59.840 --> 00:44:01.310 You got great things going on. 00:44:01.310 --> 00:44:06.080 I will be excited to hear that, hear about your continued success. 00:44:07.015 --> 00:44:07.585 Thanks, Mark. 00:44:07.665 --> 00:44:08.275 Thanks for having me. 00:44:08.625 --> 00:44:08.855 Yeah. 00:44:08.855 --> 00:44:09.265 You bet. 00:44:09.305 --> 00:44:09.815 Okay, everybody. 00:44:09.815 --> 00:44:11.805 That's another episode of the beautiful business. 00:44:11.805 --> 00:44:12.725 And we'll talk to you next time.