Fire the Canon

Make sure you have your sleepytime tea and ZzzQuil (not sponsored) on hand for this one, because things are about to get spooky and you’ll need calming agents to keep your wits about you. This week, we regale you with the story of one Ichabod Crane’s very, very weird evening. Poor, gangly, big-nosed, gangly, awkward, and gangly Ichabod is not only easily frightened but also gangly, and he could sure have used a chill pill. Rachel cannot wait to live in a nursing home. Theo comes up with a truly horrifying game. Jackie bequeaths her shower to a cockroach. Topics include: the Kool-Aid Man, biblically accurate fingernail angels, the return of bloodhorse.com, the skinny man/plump woman archetype, Ichabod Crane: Ghost Lawyer, erasing inequality one child-whoopin’ at a time, thousands of escaped crickets, the kinematic equation of velocity, Dutch Elves, Cotton Mather’s “History of New England Witchcraft”, otome games, Ignus Carbunculus, Saint Vitus, dancing Transformers, and a truly pointless, but heated, argument about the fate of Ichabod’s bod.

Show Notes

Make sure you have your sleepytime tea and ZzzQuil (not sponsored) on hand for this one, because things are about to get spooky and you’ll need calming agents to keep your wits about you. This week, we regale you with the story of one Ichabod Crane’s very, very weird evening. Poor, gangly, big-nosed, gangly, awkward, and gangly Ichabod is not only easily frightened but also gangly, and he could sure have used a chill pill. Rachel cannot wait to live in a nursing home. Theo comes up with a truly horrifying game. Jackie bequeaths her shower to a cockroach. 

Topics include: the Kool-Aid Man, biblically accurate fingernail angels, the return of bloodhorse.com, the skinny man/plump woman archetype, Ichabod Crane: Ghost Lawyer, erasing inequality one child-whoopin’ at a time, thousands of escaped crickets, the kinematic equation of velocity, Dutch Elves, Cotton Mather’s “History of New England Witchcraft”, otome games, Ignus Carbunculus, Saint Vitus, dancing Transformers, and a truly pointless, but heated, argument about the fate of Ichabod’s bod. 

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What is Fire the Canon?

Prefer your books in comedy form, but still want to sound smart at parties? We got you. Discover the hilarity hidden in the classics with new episodes every Thursday.