To skip solo intro: @11:03
In this episode, we get to meet Megan Hawkins, one of the Co-Founders of BetterU Psychedelic Therapy. She joins us from her home in Los Angeles, where she and her partner Derek Du Chesne have been recently working on opening the first brick-and-mortar location for BetterU.
Once an international model, Megan's life took a dramatic turn when she was shot at 19 yrs old. She entered the mental health system, was prescribed a mountain of medications, and like many, was overdiagnosed and overmedicated. Seeking solace from significant trauma, she left modeling for a career in mortgages and real estate, finding success but not fulfillment. Her battle with depression, anxiety, chronic pain, and PTSD persisted until 2021, when she discovered the life-changing potential of ketamine therapy. Now, she's a support and integration coach at Better U Psychedelic Therapy, using her journey to connect with and guide others on their path to recovery.
The team at BetterU works with those suffering from PTSD, Anxiety, and Depression to strategically treat these disorders with a whole treatment plan that surrounds this substance known as ketamine. Ketamine is a psychedelic non-psychedelic that, when paired with the right set, setting, intention, and work - provides a very large percentage of its patients with positive results in their overall mental health.
Perhaps you've never heard of this 'ketamine', or psychedelic therapy even, and you've never taken psilocybin - and you're wondering 'Magic mushrooms to heal my depression?' 'A horse tranquilizer for healing trauma?' 'LSD to relax?' 'Molly for my grandpa's night terrors?' 'Dude, what?' - Well, strap in because this one is for both the newcomers and the seasoned psychonauts. We're here to talk about making a diary entry, taking dissociative drugs, putting on a full blindfold, and laying on your back while headphones dance beautiful music through you - and just how the heck that could possibly heal depression.
I gave Ketamine Therapy a try myself a few months back. I found this company called "BetterU" and went through the whole process of 8 at-home sessions. I loved the way this company set everything up so well that I sent an email to interview one of them. Luckily Megan was available, and she joins us here to share her wisdom and perspective.
When Megan, at 19, found herself in a nightclub unknowingly sitting behind a well-known gangster, when there was an assassination attempt on that gangster from a shooter on the balcony above. Megan was struck by a stray bullet, and her life began to unfold quite differently from that night. She shares some of her personal journey and lays out how she's landed herself in the orbit of ketamine therapy and psychedelic healing many years later.
Ketamine isn't just about the dose or the drug, 'Set' and 'Setting' are as important as the substance. BetterU gives you the playbook and structure for the most fruitful set and setting. The setup that's done prior to the trip changes the entire thing.
I tried to shape this episode as informative to newcomers as a way of introducing Ketamine Therapy to those who haven't experienced ketamine, and emphasizing the difference between the use of Ketamine as a street drug/horse tranquilizer vs. in a therapeutic environment.
We start this episode with info about BetterU and Ketamine. Megan talks about what led to BetterU and we talk about the importance of taking Ketamine and psychedelics seriously, and the value of care and quality. She lays out the process of taking ketamine therapeutically, how long we take the drug, how many sessions per week, she lays out some fantastic analogies and examples that are easy to grasp and I try to add my personal experience as it relates to what Megan is explaining about Ketamine. We covered if you can go to work after a ketamine therapy session, if you can drive, if it hurts your stomach, it's safety, she talks about the process of setting up a trip, taking it with stimulants and medications, and if SSRI's and ketamine can go together. We talk about fasting, diet and preparation, about having a trip monitor, the importance of journaling for healing and how it seems to work, we talk about the music that drives the session, things to expect and experience during the trip, using the breath as an anchor, 'going crazy' and the fear of bad trips, those who shouldn't do psychedelics, some of the screening process, fear of the loss of control, Megan shares her traumatic experience that altered the course of her life, her journey of healing and suffering after the initial trauma and how it's changed her, shifting and adjusting to new identities and versions of ourselves, and much much more. For more on BetterU checkout their social media pages @betterucare and https://www.betterucare.com/
Their Youtube channel: https://youtube.com/@ketaminetherapy?si=GRKXYfnJVSYPaZ7k
Some notable quotes from the episode:
"We tend to focus on the big things that we're coming to this treatment for. 'I'm severely depressed, I have crippling anxiety, how do I get rid of these huge things?'. We want that magic pill to fix us and heal us. We want it to go away. But the way that this really works, is it starts off slow. It's the little things that start trickling in, they start compounding into the bigger things. Psychedelics, they tend to give us what we need, not necessarily what we want. A lot of the times we have to go through the things that we need in order to get to the things we want."
"I think that in life it's about 10 percent of what happens to you and 90 percent how you react or respond to things. Things are just going to happen. You could not have prepared for it, there's absolutely nothing you could've done to avoid it or change it. That's the way of the world. The world, it's got a mind of it's own, it's going to keep on spinning, so why get out and push?"
"You worked so hard to have this armor, to put on this mask, that protects you from any external threat. Not knowing that sometimes the biggest threat is inside our armor, it's inside our minds."
"It's not only just the physical set and setting that you're in, it's the MIND-set you're in going into it. If you're going into this feeling closed off, just like with any experience in life, the expectations or pre-conceived notions you go into any kind of experience with is more likely than not going to be the outcome." - "Yeah, you'll find ways to make that true."
"I lost my professional purpose, then romantic, then my last sense of freedom since when I had initially moved away from home. So at that point, that's where I hit my real rock bottom."
"Over the past 9 years I've been learning every step of the way. I'm never gonna not be learning, mental health is a journey not a destination. A lot of us don't tend to remember as often, we're like "I just wanna get here, then I'll be good!" but, it's like no, no, no - we're fluid creatures, we're constantly changing and evolving, always trying to be a better version of who we were yesterday. It's reminding people that it's so easy to be so hard on ourselves. "Why can't I just GET it together?" "Why can't I just be this?" "Why am I always doing this to myself?" - it's important to remember that the only way out, is through. You have to be patient with yourself, you have to give yourself grace. It is okay to not be okay."
"I'm working with patients, I'm talking with them, when they are that rock bottom place in themself when they're first coming to this treatment for whatever the reason is, whatever they've gone through, whatever pain or trauma - everybody has a different and unique experience. I will never pretend I know exactly what it is that you're going through, what your experience is. It's always going to be unique and individual to yourself. But what I do know - is that the ways in which us as human beings react and respond and try to deal with and process pain and trauma and suffering, there's a lot of overlap in the ways that we feel, and things we're trying to do."
Here are a few more resources I liked that I found surrounding Ketamine Therapy:
- How Does Ketamine Work Differently from Other Psychedelics?
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-lucid-mind/202105/how-does-ketamine-work-differently-other-psychedelics
- Ketamine: Benefits and Risks for Depression, PTSD & Neuroplasticity | Huberman Lab Podcast
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rxmv7rT9leo&t=1s
- All Things Ketamine, The Most Comprehensive Podcast Episode Ever — Dr. John Krystal
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1igJRZlqy70
Just a fun little thing I wrote -
"Imagine this: You're laying on your back in a comfortable pile of blankets and pillows, you've just journaled for 45 minutes and the writing seemed to fall right out of you. You've just done some breathing exercises and even a short meditation. You've cleared the calendar, you've accomplished the family's daily checklist, and you have the rest of the day entirely to yourself.
Now imagine in your comfortable horizontal setting that you're also wearing headphones, and a blindfold too.
Inside the headphones play beautiful curated sounds that guide and drive you, like a passenger - through a mesmerizing and awe-inducing view of the universe. Your body is relaxed, the mind swallows you with comfort. The music tells a story and you seem to be the main character of that story. A story within a simply complicated universe where you feel intimately accepted, loved, and well - like a special piece of the cosmos itself. From what feels like the inside of the pitch-black blindfold, with your eyes open or closed - is a sea of symbols, shapes, colors, and patterns - patterns that dance and move through you. Through the blindfold and into your body and spirit. You feel held, and safe to let go into the experience. Your body dances and elegantly wriggles naturally as it pleases. You pay no toll to the thoughts of tomorrow, enticements from fear, or feelings related to control of the ride. You remain held by this experience for about a hundred and twenty minutes. The music slowly fades, you can hear the sound of that black fan in the corner of your room. The room that's in your loving home, the room attached to the bathroom, which your bladders whispers to you about. You wiggle your toes and find familiarity, you're firmly in the warmth and comfort of your own bed. You've just completed your first ketamine therapy session. What a ride. You feel both tired and energized while new perspectives and experiences flood through you. You are held and you are free. Tomorrow brings a cleaner windshield for the journey ahead. You feel like tomorrow is okay, and maybe so are you. "
What is The Junkyard Love Podcast?
This is a creative/philosophical/personal-growth podcast that shares discussions with unorthodox teachers and interesting humans. Through honest conversation with the host, Jacob, we mine the hearts and minds of one another to discover interest, connection, theory, stories, joy, creativity, knowledge, and wisdom. Jacob navigates the human condition through a growing lens of mindfulness, curiosity, and thoughtfulness.
Here you'll find playful, inquisitive, and friendly dialogues with the likes of psychologists, musicians, teachers, yoga instructors, philosophers, DJs, health educators, entrepreneurs, astrologists, holistic healers, meditators, life coaches, athletes, hairdressers, authors, speakers, comedians, leaders, advocates, changemakers, seemingly regular people bursting with wisdom, artists, mathematicians, and much more.