Welcome to Overachievers Anonymous, A DHD edition. I'm Jamie Catino, a board certified occupational therapist, two times TEDx speaker and a DHD coach. Now let's talk about A DHD.

  Hello, beautiful humans and thank you so much for tuning in. First of all, let's call out the elephant in the room. You may have noticed that I changed the name to the pod of the podcast from Outsmart A DHD to Overachievers Anonymous, A DHD edition. The reason for that is that I found that the clients that I was able to help the most, to make the most impact with are those who are similar to me and to, to where they are.

High achievers, recovering perfectionists, recovering overachievers, and those who

are in. High demand jobs emotionally demanding, mentally demanding jobs, oftentimes helping professions. It's those who are burnt out in their career and with their big dreams and have a hard time just functioning as a human being outside of work, oftentimes becoming so burnt out that it leads to unemployment and helping those humans to be able to live a fully functioning life and not have to choose between their big dreams and their mental health.

Outsmart, A DHD didn't fit the vibe anymore. And I want to get a little bit more specific of exactly who I am here to help. And that includes on the podcast. So going forward the content might be a little different because I'm really tailoring it to those of you who feel like, holy shit, I have accomplished so much, but I feel like garbage let's get into today's episode. Today's episode is gonna be about what the hell to do with all of those ruminating thoughts that feel

paralyzing, like you're almost at a freeze response being an A DHD human. Unfortunately, with how our brain is wired, it is going to. Grab onto negative things a whole lot more than it's going to grab on to positive things. Why is that? When your brain ruminates, when it thinks about shitty things, sometimes that will give a sense of adrenaline.

It can give you a hit of dopamine and your brain needs that shit. It's also the same reason why eight HD will sometimes argue for the sake of arguing. They're not arguing for the sake of arguing. They're arguing because they're looking for that lack of dopamine because we have dopamine deficient brains.

So this rumination that you experience is happening because of who we are, physiologically who we are. Neurologically. And we're gonna talk about what the fuck to do about it, because there's a really, really good chance that if you're listening to this podcast, rumination is something that you struggle with, is something that all of my clients have struggled with.

It's something that I still have to work with in my daily life. The thing about A DHD, as you know, it's a neurodevelopmental disorder, which means it's not going anywhere. It's not something you can cure, but it is something that you can work with, that you can accommodate, that you can have strategies to still live a functional life with.

So let's get into it rumination when this happens, instead of trying to gaslight yourself into all of the reasons that. X, YZ may or may not happen. Go into it feeling or to thinking if this does happen, what would I do about it? But I have a caveat here. I have a Don't do this. If you have OCD, do not do this.

If you have O-C-D-O-C-D requires a different. Strategy, if you have 80 or if you have OCD, you have to shut that shit down before it has any sort of a life or else it can spin out of control. And be incredibly debilitating. Oh my gosh. I should have an episode where I bring my partner on and we talk about how we got him through an in incre an a huge, uh, breakdown because of OCD, but we're not talking about that today.

We're talking about the rumination patterns that happened because of A DHD. When you are feeling stuck because I'm worried that this is going to happen, go into it thinking if this does happen, what would I do? What would I do? And come up with an answer to it, and then when something else comes up.

But what about this scenario? If this happens, what would I do? Then I would do this. And it'll almost be like a tree where you follow the different branches and it might be starting with a big branch and then all these other little worries are coming off of it. It might be a bunch of big branches that you have to follow down the rabbit hole and give an answer to every single thing until you come to the end of those worries.

Now you're probably listening to this thinking, well, when the fuck is that gonna happen? Eventually, I've done this exercise in real time with my clients. There are a lot of things that we have to work through, questions we have to answer. Well, if this happens this absolute worst case scenario, then this will happen.

Then this will happen. Then this will happen, and it might take a little bit of time. But eventually you are going to work through all of those things that you are ruminating. And then when that thought comes back around, because it will, you can then remind yourself yes. And if that happens, I already have a plan.

I am going to do this. It'll help you to feel a sense of control over the situation. 99% of the time, you are not going to have to deal with that worst case scenario, but it is helpful because it will stop those thought loops or make them less intense, less frequent, so that you are able to function in the meantime.

Being a high achieving human that you are, I'm gonna take a wild guess that you either have a nine to five job or a successful business and a social life and maybe hobbies that you wanna get to and thought loops can feel debilitating to where it's hard to function in real time. This is something that has been incredibly helpful for myself and my clients in real time.

If you are someone like me and you need examples of what this could look like,

let's talk about it.

Now. Let's say that you are at work and you are feeling like. Your boss is not going to be okay with the presentation that you have to give on Monday. You spent all fricking weekend on it because you haven't hired me yet and you don't know how to get your work done at work because of your you don't know how to accommodate your executive functioning yet.

But let's just say you worked on this all weekend and come Monday you have to go in and do this presentation and you are worried it is going to be absolutely shit. Okay? So let's go down the rabbit hole of worry. Of how you would work through this. Now, worry number one, my boss is going to think that it's shit.

What are you gonna do if your boss thinks that it's absolute shit? You could go up to your boss after. And ask for feedback. You can be proactive about it. That's gonna look pretty good on your part because you are acknowledging, Hey, I'm not sure if this hit the mark. I would like to know if it hits the mark for next time and what exactly you're looking for.

Okay, so that is step one of the worry tree. Now, step two.

Let's say that your boss says that it is absolute garbage and puts you on a. Personal improvement plan. I think that's what the PIP stands for. Personal like improvement plan, whatever. Professional improvement plan. Okay. Let's assume that that does happen. If that does happen, they're going to have to spell out to you exactly what needs to change to be able to keep your job.

Okay, so let's say. Worst case scenario, you're put on a pip. And let's say that your brain is telling you, yeah, but you know what? I probably am not gonna be able to improve because I'm not gonna be able to take the feedback and I'm not gonna be able to work with it, or they're not gonna be specific enough and therefore I'm gonna lose my job.

Okay. Well, let's assume that you do lose your job. Let's assume that you do lose your job. Now with this, you're going to have fears that are completely irrational, and that's okay. Guess what? We are going to work with them because those irrational fears, they do come up more times than we would like to admit.

So let's say that you do lose your job. You're on this, you're on the personal improvement plan. You lose your job. Then what? I.

We'll look at what skills did you already have that allowed you to get this job?

You still have those skills. You are still the person you were when you were hired for this job. It is likely that you'll be able to find a different job, even if it is a pay cut, even if it's maybe not in the same exact industry. It's likely you'll be able to find something because you are a brilliant human.

You probably have an education and it could take some time, but you could find it. You are likely to find a different job. All right. Worst case scenario. Now, let's say that your brain is telling you, I probably won't be able to find another job. This economy is trash, which it is trash right now, especially talking from the us.

Let's say that you're having a hard time finding that job. Then what would you do? If you have any savings, you'd probably tap into your savings. If you run outta savings, is there anybody you could ask for help financially? If not, is there a friend that would probably let you live with them in the meantime until you find another job?

Probably.

So you go all the way down the worry loop. Now, once those worries come back to you, you're gonna be able to say, confidently, I already know what I am going to do in that worst case scenario. And then there's gonna be a little part of you. That reminds you when you're feeling a little bit more grounded because the logic has a really hard time coming in when you're feeling incredibly, um, dysregulated in your body.

But when you're feeling a little bit more regulated, it's gonna remind you that the likelihood that all of those things are going to happen is very, very, very, very low. But if they do happen, you have a plan for every single step. Is it. Ideal. No, but you have a plan for every single step. Okay.

Now, the purpose behind this exercise and this strategy is not to know exactly what you would do in those scenarios. That's not the goal of it. The goal of this exercise is so that you are able to ground yourself and to a more functional space to be able to function as the human that you need to be in that moment, whether that is to.

Be able to complete your job tasks, whether that is to be able to regulate so that you're able to have healthy relationships, whatever it is that you need to focus on in that moment when focus is already hard for us, this is what that is meant for. To reduce those thought loops to a place where you are able to.

Move forward. I repeat the reason behind this exercise is not. The end goal is not to figure out exactly what you would do in those scenarios. The reason for that is to bring you back to a more functional place. I promise you that this works a fuck of a lot better than gaslighting yourself into thinking it's never going to happen.

Those thought loops do not stop completely on their own. You do have to work with them again. Not if you have OCD talking to those who do not have OCD. Do not do this if you'd have OCD. But if you have a DHD and you are a ruminator like myself, this will be incredibly helpful for you. When I was talking about this strategy during a coaching call one of the people in the coaching call was a mental health therapist and a clinical social worker, and told me that this is called acceptance and commitment therapy.

So fun fact, I stumbled upon a therapeutic method used with mental health practitioners just in my coaching practice. Try this. I'm really curious to hear how it helps you to be able to function as a human in real time. And I am looking forward to talking to you next time. Now, if you are curious about my coaching, there is a link in the show notes.

I would love to chat with you over a free consultation. Alright, my friends. Until next time. Bye now. 

 I'm an occupational therapist. Turned a DHD coach for overachieving. Perfectionistic. Brilliant, but burnt out. A DHD humans. Are you curious about my one-on-one coaching schedule a free consult link is in the show notes, or go to out smart A DH d.co. I'll see you next time.