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The hardest part of achieving a goal is starting. Being sendy means making courageous decisions to try something before you have all of the answers. This podcast will remind you of the remarkable life you are living and will give you new ideas to make your life more meaningful and exciting and give you courage to accomplish your goals by stopping the negative voices in your head and just sending it!
In many, many ways, like I said, it checks a lot of boxes. It's, you know, very good for my mental health as well. It makes me feel
fulfilled and like I've done something for myself and then I have more to give because you you can't give from an empty cup.
My son who's 22 since he was 14, he's been running his own dirt bike business. And his senior year, he said, my goal is to make more
than my high school teachers this year. And he did that. And that is not anything that I taught him or my husband taught him. One thing my husband is really good at is forcing our children to do hard things, to learn hard things. When they say, dad, how do I do this? He says, go figure it out.
welcome to the Sendy Mom podcast. I am really excited to be here with my good friend, Kim Jonas. We have been friends for a very long time. Yeah. when I was in high school.
because I've known Becky's in-laws family for a lot of years in high school. we happened to move into the same neighborhood, like what, 10 years ago? I think so.
Kim dated my brother-in-law, which is really fun. So she was almost my sister-in-law, but now she's kind of my sister. True story. God wanted us to be together no matter what. That's right. And we a lot of Sendy things together. We sure do. Which is super fun. So we're going to get into some of the Sendy things that we do together.
And so my first question is, what do you think a Sendy mom is? That's a good question. And I think maybe you're trying to
have this Sendy mom persona of someone that is always adventuring. But I would think a Sendy mom is someone who does things that frighten them. So maybe someone is naturally very adventurous and they love to be climbing mountains and they love to be rappelling or doing things like that that brings them alive. But maybe like sitting quietly is frightening to some people. Maybe...
you know, finding education or I just think there are things that can be frightening to people that are not just being on top of a mountain, being on a bike, being, you doing these adventurey type things like being Sendy can mean coming outside of yourself and doing what doesn't come naturally to you. think that's really true. And I now I'm curious, what do you what do you think makes you Sendy?
What would be terrifying for you? For me at this point in my life, I think going back to school would be scary. Just adding more to my life is scary. Purposefully adding a job, a career, podcast, a project, something like that.
adding more feels. So it sounds like you're already feeling a little bit overwhelmed. Yeah, it's been a busy year and I think we're all busy. We all fill our time and so I do you feel like you're do you feel like you're choosing the kinds of activities that you would like to be participating in? Or do you feel like you're just having to deal with it because this is your life right now and there's a lot of things that are happening? I think I can do a little of both in my day.
I think I have been very purposeful and intentful in carving out time for myself every day, making sure I get exercise in, which for me, exercise is more than just exercise. It's not just 30 minutes on a treadmill. For me, exercise is getting outside, connecting with God, connecting with nature, connecting with my friends, moving my body, getting my blood flowing. Like it checks a lot of boxes for me, so it's easy to carve out.
an hour or two in my day for myself. And then, you know, I have five children and a husband and a home to run and several big projects that we took on this year. And so there's also a lot of that you could just sit in your bed, right? In morning, you could choose to just stay asleep or just, you know, wander around your house aimlessly or whatever. But you're choosing to purposefully
and spend time with your family, with your friends and take those couple of hours to actually, you know, go out into nature and to commune with God. And do you feel like that has made you a better person or do you feel like that's helped you to develop as a person? yeah. In many, many ways, like I said, it checks a lot of boxes. It's, you know, very good for my mental health as well. It makes me feel
fulfilled and like I've done something for myself and then I have more to give because you you can't give from an empty cup. Exactly to be able to send out you know so being Sendy is more than just like going and doing things it's also being able to give what you have like all of the talents and gifts that you've been given and then being able to help other people inspire other people to become better but also
One thing that you have to know about Kim too, she is everybody's friend. she knows so many people. She is a real connector because she has so many different friends in different places and does different things. I really appreciate that. I love people and I'm a natural extrovert. so that comes easy to me. And something frightening to me would be
you know, sitting alone and not being social throughout the day. is a frightening thing to me. that's natural for me too. Yeah. And I guess that's really true. I guess we could talk a little bit about extroversion and introversion because I consider myself an introvert. I get a lot more energy from like these one-on-one conversations that gives me some energy. introversion doesn't necessarily mean that you want to sit at home alone by yourself, right? It's just that
I'm not the one that goes in the room and lights up the whole place like you do, you know? But, you know, I will say Becky is really good at this is why she is good at this podcast, because she's good at getting down to the deep stuff, like asking these really deep, good questions and forcing you to think. I am really good at like the working the room and how's everyone doing and the and all the surface stuff. But then when you like
try to ask me something really deep, I like, you know, I don't want to think, I don't want to talk, I don't want to feel, I just want to like work the room and chit chat with everyone and then. And have, that kind of energy, but, but we have had some really good deep conversations too, which I really appreciate. And, and so that's, mean, that's really the thing is like, there are so many different personalities and different strengths that people have, right? And we can really.
bring out the best in anybody, no matter what personality trait that you have. So introduce yourself, tell me about yourself, you know, maybe something that you feel like makes you Sendy and, or, or you can just talk about your family, the one that you came from, as well as the one that you're raising right now. Okay.
I am a Utah girl. was born in Southern California, but my family moved to Utah when I was 10 and I've been here basically ever since. My dad works for the LDS church, so I grew up in a very warm, loving, very active in our community and in the church. Not lots of extra money, but I never lacked for anything and there was just very present parents and
and a lot of siblings and we're all still really close. So I feel really, really blessed to have been brought up that way. And my husband who comes from kind of an opposite family who is not as close. we've kind of come together and said, you know, what do we want for our family and what do we want this to look like? And we have five children together
My husband is my very best friend I love and I have a wonderful marriage. I'm so grateful every single day for him. And our children are growing up to be amazing people. We're kind of spanning everything right now. Our oldest is 22, our youngest is 11. So we're kind of doing everything from the young adult life and college life to high school and a junior high student.
and an elementary student. So we're still just, you know, trying to figure out all of those things and spanning it all. And that can be a little bit overwhelming. Well, let's talk about your kids for just a minute then. So what are maybe some of the things that you have done? Have there been anything, has there been anything deliberate that you and John have come together and thought we want our children to be?
better risk takers? Because I know that you have, you know, you've been a little bit more deliberate about teaching your children to be entrepreneurs because John's an entrepreneur. And, you know, is there anything specific that you have taught your children to be able to be a little bit more risk takers? You know, I kind of think when it comes to entrepreneurship and risk taking and things like that, that is something that comes natural because I come from a family of like
They want the nine to five job with the paycheck every two weeks and that security. And that's a wonderful way to live a life. And then I marry a man that says, I don't want to have a job and I want to work for myself. And so, you know, I start clipping coupons and scrimping and saving and supporting my husband and his dream so that he can start his own business. And I did have to set up some boundaries of, you know, if we get to a point where we can't afford to live, then, you know, you're marketable. You have an education. You can go.
get a job. We're never going to be living off of credit or going to our parents for money like that. luckily his business has been very successful. My son who's 22 since he was 14, he's been running his own dirt bike business. He imports dirt bikes from China and Becky's sons have all kind of been part of it. They help him with that business. And his senior year, he said, my goal is to make more
than my high school teachers this year. And he did that. And that is not anything that I taught him or my husband taught him. My husband who, because he is a natural entrepreneur, could kind of guide him. But I just think that is natural. One thing my husband is really good at is forcing our children to do hard things, to learn hard things. When they say, dad, how do I do this? He says, go figure it out.
He's not just going to hand them answers. mean, even when we're teaching our children to drive, we have this huge van that we force them to drive that. We force them to drive that into a parking lot and park it. And, you know, we want them to do these hard things so that there's not fear
let's put them into this big van that is going to be really difficult to parallel park.
and then have them do that because when they get into a little car, it's gonna be super easy for them to do all the things that they need to do. I think that's a great lesson to teach. Okay, I wanna go back though to when John decided to start this business, how was that for you? How did you manage the feelings of insecurity during that period of time?
it was scary, but we were in a really good situation for it. We just had one child at the time. I may have been pregnant with our second. We lived in this teeny tiny home in Provo that we owned, but it had a basement apartment, so that helped pay the mortgage. And we had saved and saved and saved. And he did have a side job that money was coming in. And he just.
He just hated his job. He was out of college and he just hated the nine to five. He just was so unhappy and you want yourself to be happy. And so he just said, you know. sounds like you built up some security before you jumped into it. Yeah. Yeah. So we didn't start from zero. had, I, we'd kind of known this was going to come. And like I said, I grew up without a ton of extra. So I wasn't
I wasn't needing a ton of extra, you know, we, had plenty to eat. We had a warm home. It was furnished. We all had clothes like that. That was perfect to me. And I didn't need more than that. And so my husband, he quit his job and started working at home. That at one point literally saved my life that my husband was at home when I was pregnant with my second pregnancy.
I had a miscarriage, I hemorrhaged terribly. had an 18 month old at the time. And I think I may have bled out in my home had I been home alone with my child. My husband was home and was able to take care of it. And then I've had all healthy pregnancies since then. And then when the pandemic happened in 2020 and all the men were working at home, my husband had been working at home for
almost 20 years and we were used to it. And so all my friends that are coming say, my gosh, my husband's home all the time. What do I do? I'm like, I don't know. Isn't it great? I kind of love it. My husband's always been home and you know, I'd have a newborn baby and I could lay it in his lap and say, I'm gonna go take a shower. And you know, he's always been a hundred percent involved in the children's schedules and he could help with carpools and meals and naps. And I mean, he just has always been around. That's just the life that we've
I wonder
how you were able to solve the problem of like what you wanted to do when you were gonna go to school and then what you ended up doing and how you feel about that. That's a painful subject and I never felt like I had the opportunity to say like, what do I want to do? What do I want to be when I grow up? Because I didn't have a lot of doors open to me.
have had a job since I was 14 years old. I've always had to work for anything. I've had to work to, you know, buy my own prom dress, or if I wanted to go to the movies with my friends or any of those things I worked for. And so when it came to like paying a college tuition, that just felt impossible. My parents are so financially responsible. They encouraged me not to get student loans, which has blessed my life immensely.
and set my husband and I up to be able to let him, yes, buy a home and let him put his job and build a business. So I'm grateful for that. So I did do a year in college and then just couldn't afford it. felt like I didn't have any other options and I had an opportunity to go to beauty school for free. So I did a year of cosmetology school.
And then I got married not long after I finished that and my husband and got married and I did go back to school for about another year. And then I had my first baby and I just never finished my education. So you said earlier that that would be something that would be terrifying. Is it something that you even want to do or are you kind of over school? No, I'm not over school. I think I might be over traditional school. I don't know that I can see myself like
going back and, you know, sitting in the classroom and taking notes. Yeah. I mean, I would be like the grandmother of the classroom. I don't think they would know what to there are a lot of them, people that do go back. So it's something you could totally do. But there are a lot of things that interest me and I would be interested in gaining more education in things like landscape design or
I just, know, something like that where you, can go get a certificate in something like that. And so yes, I'm interested in more education. I think that as humans we should be, and we should always be progressing. And as my family grows older and I can see maybe some time freeing up, then I want to do those things. for sure. More than consider it. Like I can see them happening.
But traditional school, I don't think I need to go back and get a bachelor's degree at this point. mean, my husband's job, his business has left him with a lot of flexibility in his schedule. And I don't want to tighten up our schedule and lose what we have. And that's kind of the same thought process I've had to go through too, because I love being educated. I love getting
more knowledge, I listen to tons of podcasts and books and you know, and things like that. And I love talking to people and getting new ideas and everything. And so think you're absolutely right. I think that is just that's a human need. That's a human desire. So I don't think that I'm any different than anybody else. But, you know, there are lots of non traditional ways to go about that. And so last year, I got a certificate in social media marketing, which was really
great. I'm glad that I did it and I didn't really know what I wanted to do with it after I had it because really it was just the classes that seemed really interesting to me. And so that's kind of part of how this podcast was born because I had all these skills and I also wanted to be a better communicator.
there are so many different, we are so, so blessed at this time in the Earth's history to have so much knowledge that is accessible, that we can,
pretty much learn about anything that we want to and become near experts if you put enough time and energy into it, right?
at some point in every mother's life, you kind of have to sit back and go, okay, like I've put all my hopes and dreams on hold for a long time. and what are they? And do I have them? And if I don't, then I should probably get some. so I kind of did that this summer after I had had a, a really crazy busy year. And I kind of had to do the
I think I'm ready to start building some of my hopes and dreams. I hesitate to say that because I feel like it's a balance. And I often see mothers, their youngest goes into first grade and now they have all their children in all day school. And then they kind of like check out and like they're done. Like they've done it, they've raised their family and then they wanna go straight into their hopes and dreams, which I...
would never judge another mother for the things that she does. But for me, I want to be all in very purposeful with my parenting. I wanna be there for my youngest the same way I was there for my oldest because I was forced to be there for my oldest because I had all these other little kids at home. I had just had to be home. I still wanna be home for my youngest. still want to parent and mother, even my young adult children. I wanna be available to them. I don't want.
my hopes and dreams to get in the way of what I have committed to in life and being a mother and. Well, and part of that's part of your hopes and dreams, right? Yeah. Is to be a mother and to be able to see it through to all of your children. So, and that's being Sendy too. to be deliberate about your parenting and make sure that you're helping your children to reach their full potential too. Yeah. So keep those commitments.
So, but there is a balance of, when you start, when your family does start to grow and need you less and want you less, to spread their wings, then you do kind of have to go, what will bring me joy and what can I do to grow myself? Right. And how can I contribute to the rest of the world? I want to be able to contribute. I want to be able to do something.
And sometimes maybe that's a little unhealthy because really you're contributing just by being there. even if you are comatose, right? You can do nothing. You still have somebody that's taking care of you. So you are providing for that person an opportunity to serve you, So there are so many different ways that we can.
be of use to people. so why is it that we, I don't know, why is it that I always feel like I need to be doing more? Like haven't done enough? I don't know. Well, you definitely shouldn't feel like you need to do more. think any mother is doing their part. And you you can't, you can never ever be replaced in your home. You can be replaced in a job, you can be replaced in a school, you can be replaced.
within your community, someone else can do those jobs. But mothering the children that you and your husband have brought here, not anyone else can replace that. And that is divine. you know, so many people who are a little messed up because their mother was not present or their mother checked out, it was just like, that's where a lot of dysfunction comes
Hums from. Yeah. No, and you're right. But I think that my children would say that I could be replaced at times. But they're wrong.
down where it counts, yes, you cannot be replaced and eventually they appreciate you a lot more too. we can't be our kid's best friend all the time.
there are some things you're just gonna have to say no to, or you're gonna have to. I tell my kids all the time, I've got enough of my own friends. I did not have you to have friends. Exactly. I am your mother and I will always be your mother. That's right, and this is what I'm not trying to be cool. I'm trying to help you grow into a functional adult.
Yeah, exactly. And that's how we help our children to be functional adults is by putting boundaries. We have to put boundaries there sometimes.
Well, OK, so you have done like as far as like physical, sendy sorts of things. Kim is like the ultimate at she's swim. How long have you been swimming? About 10 years. Yeah, 10 years. I learned to swim as an adult twice, twice a week. Yeah. Like that's where you learned how to swim. Yeah, I learned how to swim as an adult. OK, so how did that come about?
you know, I had had my fifth baby. I had previously been a runner. I mean, I say runner, but like, you know, I, that's just what I did. Cause that's easy to run. It's easy to put on a pair of tennis shoes and walk out your front door. and I just felt unhealthy. I was overweight and I just didn't see running being sustainable through my whole life. It's just so impactful on your body. And I,
I am not ADD, but I'm a lot of, High energy. Yeah, I just like, can't focus in really well on one thing. Like if someone were to say to me, hey, let's go run this trail every Monday morning. I am like, no, I'm not doing that. Like I'll run every Monday morning, but I need different trails. Right. You know, I just need a, I need variety in my life. And so I was drawn to triathlon.
I had not owned a bike in my adult life. I knew how to swim. Like I could keep my head above water. I was safe in the water. I grew up in the water, but I didn't know any technique of swimming. So I started watching YouTube videos. I'm very lucky. I have a pool at my home. So in the privacy of my own home, I could practice some things. And then I started going to the rec center and I would just watch and find some that looked like they knew what they were doing. And I would say,
Hey, do you mind watching me and telling me where I can improve on my stroke? Wow, that's sendy Kim. So I just started doing that. And then I would just take people's advice. And then I found this master of swim class at our local rec center and started going to that about 10 years ago. And I love to swim. I love the water. It's an active recovery. It stretches my body. It moves my body. It gets the blood flowing. It's not impactful.
You're almost never going to be injured as a swimmer. just love it. love it. And about that same time, just I bought a bike. I knew not one single thing about bikes. I had a friend that was selling a road bike and I bought it and started riding it. just like, you know, over time, slowly like, why what are these things that like, why are people clipped to their pedals? And, know, just starting to talk to people and ask people and.
go to the bike shop and watch videos and just. Yeah. And so, you did a triathlon. Have you done several triathlons? So I've done a lot of sprint distances. The sprint is like the shortest distance, like total. It's going to take you about an hour, hour and a half to do it. I've done a handful of Olympic distances, which is double what a sprint is. And that'll take you maybe about three hours. And then I have done one half Ironman, which is the 70.3 distance.
And that's gonna take about six hours. I did that when my family was really young. My baby was only about two. So I had, you five kids from two to 13. And I crossed that finish line. And I just remember thinking, you know, if I'm gonna spend this much time doing something when my family is this young, it should probably be a little bit more worthwhile. You know, taking time away from my family, should like...
And, but it did its job and it gave me the motivation to carve out that time for myself every single day. Yeah. Which has been really important for you to keep your mental health. Right. yeah. Yeah. And I do have to say just last week, I did my very first mountain bike race.
yeah. It was a 60 mile mountain bike race. Now, 60 miles on the mountain is totally different than 60 miles on the road. Right. It took me seven and a half hours. Seven and a half hours. It was very hard. my gosh. And it's up and down. It's just up and down. mean, it was a constant up and down. There was almost no space where you felt like, OK, I can rest. I can breathe. I can eat. I can make up time like.
It was just like this constant push of up and down and the down. you take any breaks at all during that? I mean, I never stopped and like got off my bike and took a break. seven and a half hours, you were just pedaling. Almost. I did. So it was a three lap loop. So after each 20 miles, I I saw my husband, I would get off my bike and he would, you know, massage my bike. no, no, no. He was dealing with bike. Okay. And I'd like,
shoved some stuff in my mouth. I was eating, you know, like goos and stuff on the ride and I would change out my waters and I'd get back on. So I was maybe off my bike for a minute or two and I'd jump back on and how did you learn how to ride that bike the right way? mean, same thing. My husband got into mountain biking first. After I did, after I got into road biking, he got into road biking with me and a friend of ours said, you like road biking?
Let me introduce you to mountain biking. And he took him mountain biking and the rest is history. I hasn't gotten off his bike. No, he's not got up his bike. He has gotten our children on mountain bikes by two oldest children have been nationally ranked mountain bikers. I mean, we've like gone really hard on the mountain biking thing. And yes, yes. And that is, that's been a really big blessing in our lives. And that's been a lot of fun. So, you know, you just.
I feel like in everything, in swimming and biking, there's always another something you can work on. Like it keeps your mind active. And if you feel like you have one thing down, then there's another thing you're not doing right. Yeah. And it just keeps your body healthy and helps you to be able to be active with your children, able to do things with them. Yeah. We've done a lot of cool things. Yeah.
Becky Brouwer (29:36)
So we're about halfway through this podcast with Kim Jonas, and I have totally enjoyed talking with her. And usually at this point, we would do a Sendy Moms Spotlight. And this week's Spotlight is on Corrie ten Boom And she's an incredible woman, and I encourage you to learn more about her. I am going to make that an.
episode after this one. So there will be two episodes this week and probably in the future, this is the way that I'll be doing it and we'll do the Sendy Spotlight as its own episode. So be sure to listen to that one as well. If you like this podcast, take a minute and go and give me a review and rate the podcast wherever you listen to it. really helps.
for people to be able to find it and to know that it's something that's worthwhile. So hopefully you're enjoying this conversation with Kim. I certainly did. And she's an amazing woman.
Becky Brouwer (30:33)
So what are some of the favorite places that you've been on your bikes? Because I know that you guys have
traveled quite a bit and brought your bikes with you. So tell me about a few of those. Yeah, we, my husband and I and some friends of ours went to Switzerland and rode bikes through Switzerland a few years ago. And we just thought, man, this is the coolest way to see a place. So we kind of dreamed up this whole plan of doing that with our children. And so a couple of years ago, we, we pack everything.
on our bikes. We were essentially bike packing, but we're staying in hotels. We're not camping. And we flew to Paris. We rode our bikes from Paris, France to Munich, Germany. And we're all over Paris and Germany and Switzerland and Austria in that time. then- matching kits. Yes, in our matching kits. Yes. Yes. And then we had new kits made this year. And this year we did Italy and Croatia. We rode from Milan, Italy to Split, Croatia.
through part of Slovenia. that is sendy. So tell me about, because I know that it rained a ton too. But you guys kept a pretty good attitude and your kids were... Yeah, the rain's not that bad because it's not terribly cold. Okay, in the summertime. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, I can be a lot of things. I can be hungry and dirty and tired. I can be a lot of things, but if I'm cold, that's...
We're done. That's gonna kill the deal for me. am. Yeah, I'm done. But you know, you're wet and you're dirty and you're smelly and whatever. And you just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. But if I'm cold, I'm not going to keep going. If I'm cold, I'm gonna sit down and cry. Well, that's interesting because you do an awful lot of skiing too. So you just get the right gear, I guess. You get the right gear. I ski because I love my family and my family loves to ski.
We were in Croatia this summer and I really loved Croatia. The people in Croatia were just so genuine and kind and it was really, it was a special place to be and because we were riding our bikes, we missed a lot of the big things that people normally go to see in Croatia, but we saw a lot of the little things and
you know, we would be riding our bikes on these back country roads and we would come upon, you know, old dilapidated buildings, know, old farmhouses that had been bombed out by the war in the nineties. We came across this old church that I mean, like the spirit there was palpable. The reverence there, I just like,
And this is something that was never, it wasn't on a map. You don't know what it is. There's not one single tourist there. No one knows about it. But I just walked around and could picture the lives of the people who were married here, who were blessing babies here, who lived and struggled and loved and died here. And it just was the spiritual experience for me to be in this quiet place. And so I really loved that.
Well, and it can be kind of scary to go on a trip without having everything all planned out. We didn't really talk about that, but I think that that's a really good point to bring up for being a Sendy mom is that some of the best memories I have are similar to that where it wasn't planned out, but we came across this church and it was probably the best part. I'm talking about, the best part of the trip was this place that we hadn't even planned on. And so sometimes,
that it's actually a good thing to just kind of follow your heart. Make the plans, make the trip, and then you just go. And then everything kind of works out from there. Yeah, I mean, a trip like that, there are a lot of variables. So we can't plan too far in advance. In fact, we get into one place and say, okay, where are gonna stay tomorrow night? And you have to look at the terrain that you have to cover. Are we climbing? Are we flat?
you know, how far have we ridden the last couple of days? What are our bodies feeling like? Can we get 50 miles tomorrow? Can we get 20 miles tomorrow? Is there something in a 20 mile radius that is available for us to stay and can they take bikes? You know, so there are so many variables. and, and sometimes you do make a plan and you're, you want to get 50 miles the next day. And then there's a flat at 25 miles and you end up having to scramble and find a hotel there. So you can fix, I mean, you know, things like this have happened.
And it has been a spectacular teaching opportunity for our children that like, we're going to roll with the punches and we're going to take what life throws at us.
And we had several large hiccups on our trip this past summer that we were just able to overcome as a family and discuss and here are our options and what should we do and what do you guys think? And here's what we think and here's, know, and really like say, you know, no matter what we're going to figure this out and we're, all going to be fine. And then just a month later, our daughter was traveling to Bolivia on her LDS mission and they
hit these hiccups and she was like, okay, you guys, we're gonna figure this out. What are our options? Here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna get through this. And she kind of took the reins on this problem because she had learned it previously. And so- Yeah, sometimes we wanna protect our children so much and keep them from doing things. as we share with them the struggles that we've had, that's how we teach them to be able to overcome other difficulties they're gonna have.
So I love that you've had that you can see how that has actually benefited your children to learn those through some of the trips. And like you said, whatever the circumstance is, you have to just be aware of those teaching moments and involve your children in those those moments instead of saying, we're the parents, we're making this decision. I loved how you made it kind of not necessarily democracy because in the end, mom and dad make the decision, right?
yeah. But it's great to get all the ideas and to help your children to feel like they are part of a unit and we're going to figure this out. And those decision-making skills are super important for kids to learn because eventually they are going to be on their own and going to have to figure things out. So I love that. Well, and I don't think you need a European
vacation to
teach these things, know, just this week, we had a presidential election. And on the night of the election, we were having dinner and having conversation with our children. And I think whatever is going on in the world or in your home or in your family, you can be open with them. you know, and we just, we talked to our children about it. And I mean, we were like, listen, we voted for one person and we don't know who is going to win tonight, but no matter what, like,
your lives are wholly going to be the same. You know, we have each other. We have a warm home. We have plenty of food. We still live in a free land and we can worship as we please. And yeah, we're going to ski this winter and we're going to go to Lake Powell summer and our lives are going to go on. So let's not get all distraught. And so I just think you can every day you can have teaching moments with your children. If you're just
if you vocalize things and you point out to them, hey, you know, this is going on, or this is how I feel, or this happened to me today. Have those conversations with your kids. Yeah, it's just about it's about having conversations and not doing it in a lectur-y kind of way because there's nothing that's going to turn especially teenagers off faster than then lecturing to them. Right? So and maybe you haven't gotten to that point yet when with your adults where they have
very different opinions, you know, politically or whatever than you do. I definitely will not very different, you know, I think when it comes down to us, most of us actually kind of believe a lot of the same things, we just go about it in a different way, right. But sometimes that can be really difficult to talk about certain subjects with your adult children. But the thing that's helped me the most is to just remain curious.
and try to think about it in a curious way instead of defensive. It's very easy to go into this defensive mode when things don't turn out the way that you want them to, or if somebody is attacking, you know, what your beliefs are and everything. And so, when that starts happening and I can feel myself getting really riled up and kind of irritated about it, I just remind myself, be curious, find out why they feel that way. And things work out so much better when I can do that. I love that.
Well, good. Okay, so let me talk to you for a second about Powell, because I know you guys have a boat and we've been with you twice. Yeah, twice. how do you go about like deciding to get a boat and you guys have a partner, I think, or something like that. then
you know, outfitting yourself. Okay, actually, this is what I really want to talk about. How do you figure out how to camp at Powell? Because that is a huge deal to, you know, some people, I guess I'm kind of interested in this, because some people might think, wow, that sounds really cool. You can actually take your boat and you can go camp at Powell.
I would have never known how to go about that. I would have just stayed in Airbnb and taken my boat out on the lake. But you guys actually take all of your stuff and you go and set up camp somewhere along the lake. Yeah, I mean, I grew up in Utah and I'd never been to Lake Powell, but you hear about it a ton. And we just said, we want to figure this out. Like, what is this Lake Powell place? you know, we didn't.
know anything, you just start talking to people. We're talkers. We're going to start asking people, know, you go to Lake Powell, where do you go? And figure it out. And we knew we didn't want to spend the money on a houseboat. so our first year we rented a ski boat and we just loaded our camping gear in and my husband had asked around and figured out about the right place to go. And then you go set up camp. And so we camped for a few years until
Eventually we did buy in with the houseboat and yeah. And so now we think we're pretty cool because we have a houseboat. I think your point about, know, if you want to do something, there is a way that you can do it. You just have to ask a lot of people.
Yeah, to start small. Don't think you have to do. I mean, if you want to take your family to Europe, don't think you have to go ride your bikes through Europe. You might not even be to afford to take your family to Europe. If you want to vacation with your family, that is one thing we really wanted to do. I come from a family who is all about traditions. I have a grandpa who, we have so many traditions because of my grandpa. And one of them was an annual family trip.
Those are the very, very, very best memories of my life. And so my parents have continued that. We have an annual family trip with all of my family. And then my husband and I just said, you know, we want that for our family too. we just, so ours happens to be Lake Powell, but it can be something else. It can be anything. You can go dirt camp for almost nothing. It doesn't have to be.
a big fancy thing if you just want to be together with your family and make it a priority that they know we're gonna be together and we're gonna vacation together every year. Yeah, I and I think traditions are a great way to, I mean we want to carry on the good parts of our families and share that with our children so they can share it with their children. That's part of the reason why we're set up in families, right?
children come knowing nothing. So they've got to come to somebody that can teach them what the world is like and how to function in the world properly. And we do that really well through tradition.
Are there other little traditions that you would call, I don't know, maybe you'd call them traditions in your family, things that you do every day or every week that
have an impact on your family that you think are teaching, hopefully teaching them some correct principles. You know, my husband and do a lot of things wrong as parents. One thing we do really well though is we're really good at prayer with our family. We pray, right now we're praying three times every morning because we have a high schooler and a junior higher and an elementary kid and they all leave at different times of the day. And so we...
individually with each of them every single morning and then we gather at night and we pray at the end of the day. And I feel like often I can preach a sermon to my children through your prayer, through my prayers in not so many words. You know, when you can say, Heavenly Father, help this child to look outside of themselves today.
help this child to find someone to serve. That is one of our, I think every family has their little sayings that they say in their prayers. And that's one of ours. Help me find someone to serve today. if you know a child's not feeling well, or they have a test coming up or a date or, you know, it's just, they know that mom is aware of their life and mom is praying for them and they see it. And then I feel like, and now I send you off.
And so that is important to me. Even if you're not religious, having that kind of time to be thinking outside of yourself is really important to teach your children to look outside themselves too.
Not only does it do that, but I feel like it helps me to zone in a little bit more on that child, which is really important, because sometimes that's where you, like, we get so caught up in what we're doing every day and that it's hard to think about that child and their needs and things that, yeah, we can help them with. So, yeah. And I think like you said, even if you're not a religious person, even if before you send your child out, you,
take 30 seconds to tell them what you hope for them in the day. Because that's what prayer is. It's telling my child what they hope for them and asking the higher being to help with that. if you are just saying, hey, I hope for you today that you can come outside of yourself. I hope that you do well on your test today. I hope that you feel comfortable in your presentation. It doesn't have to be a prayer to God if that's not where you are. It can just be.
a 30 second statement to your child of your hopes for them for the day. Absolutely. I love that. Yep. And well, and accompanied with a hug or you know, always a hug. Yeah.
Yeah. You know, and it's just about the connections, right? And so it's finding these opportunities.
to connect, you know, and it's with humans really, you know, but especially these children that are so impressionable, you know, they need to know that there's somebody there that is looking at that cares about them and is looking out for them. So yeah, well, I think that makes you make better choices when you know, I have to come home at the end of the day and I have to face my mom and my mom's aware and my mom sees me and you know that and somebody cares and she cares about what I'm
Yeah. And she'll call me out.
I've got a few rapid fire questions. Are you ready for that? what has brought you joy in the last 24 hours?
Let's see, can I remember the last 24 hours? I did swim yesterday as I do. And because I had just done this really long mountain bike race, I had been on my bike like six days a week. So I hadn't been swimming as consistently in the last couple of months. So that felt really good to get back to swim. And that really made me very happy. So tell me what, like, is it the feel of the water? Is it being quiet? What is it that...
you love about swimming. All of those things. I love the water. love, I do love the quiet because I don't have that often in my life, but also because I've been doing this for 10 years. There are women in the class who have also been doing it. And so we have a really good relationship and connection with those women. And, it just, it just feels good on your body. I also, it's now, I don't know when people listen to this or when this will be released, but it's November in Utah and it's just gotten cold.
And I like to go to this gym called Hot Works where they have saunas. So I did that this morning and I got a really good sweat on so that that made me happy too. Love it. That's great. Okay. So what was the last TV show or documentary that you watched that you liked? you know, I was just on an airplane last week and I watched 26.2 to Life about... I watched that on the plane too.
Yeah, about the old running coach that was going to the prison and helping men run marathons in like little circles in their prison. And I had just come off reading Tattoos on the Heart. Maybe that's another question about a which is about a pastor in East LA who helping gang members to come out of that life and get jobs and everything. And so that just felt, they felt really similar
That is the next question about books and Miriam's mentioned that one too as her favorite. yeah, tattoos on the heart. Yeah. Yeah, that is a good one. let me just say tattoos on the heart. listened to it and I liked it so much. I ordered a hard copy and I've been reading that and marking that.
I might do that too because I seriously I listened to it and I was just bawling. I know, I know. It's fun to listen to it in his voice. I had to text Miriam. I was like, my gosh. It's so good. It is good. sobbing all morning. So good. Yeah. And right now I'm reading The Small and the Mighty by Sharon McMahon. It's a nonfiction about 12 different Americans who she feels have changed the course of America.
and brought about change in their own small way. Do you listen to her podcast at all? I don't. It's really good. it is. I'm it's great. I would totally recommend that one. So interesting and diverse. A lot of things about history, politics, so it's great.
Name one thing that you try to do every day.
I do try to exercise every day except for Sunday So, well at least, you five days a week.
And I hug and kiss my husband every day. I love that. That's really good. That's sweet.
here's one. I play Wordle every single day. We need to be friends on Wordle Can you be friends on Wordle? Yes, I have like all these. Well, the whole New York Times thing, you can have like leaderboards or whatever with people. So it's just me and Kyle right now. So, we should get on. I have like I've played Wordle like five hundred times something like that. Not in a streak, not always. You know, sometimes I'm out of town or I'll miss a day here and there. But I mean, like
Almost every day for years I play wordle. That's funny. That's what Sherrie Gavin said. really? that was her one thing that she In fact there are three New York Times games I play. I play wordle and connections and strands. Those are my three I like. okay, I haven't done strands. I've done wordle and connections and I do Sudoku but I don't like it on New York Times. I think it's really hard. The Sudoku one. anyway. Alright, so what do you think I should try next?
you know, at the beginning of this, I said that being Sendy is doing something that frightens you. And I am going to guess that sitting still frightens you. So I would be interested, Becky, in seeing you try to get rid of some of the extra things you have in your life. Seeing you try to find contentment in
being home. And I'm not saying sitting scrolling your phone. saying finding contentment and not going doing being so much all the time saying no to some things, clearing out your life a little bit. That actually sounds really nice.
So, okay, saying no. So that's, yeah, that's your Sendy thing. Yeah, I think that would be good. Yeah. All right. Well, thank you.
Thank you so much for being on my podcast. was really fun to have this conversation with Kim today. She is just such an amazing person and such a great friend. And I've said some like stupid things to her. I've done dumb things. we've been through a lot together and she still likes me. still likes me. it's, so, you know, that's, that is something to feel that security. And in the end, I think
Most of us want to be that person for somebody and we want to feel that acceptance. And that's part of what this podcast is about is to help people to understand that they're not alone, that there is something within them that is worthwhile and that they have something to contribute to the world. And so I appreciate Kim being here with me to help express that and to build and lift other people and inspire them to do.
sendy things, whatever that happens to be and whether it's, you know, riding a bike in Europe or whether it's just sitting still saying no to something so you can say yes to other things. Yes, think all those things are really important.
So thanks for being here and we will see you next time.