Parenting in the Trenches with Karen Peters

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An FAQ around parenting anxious kids is "I feel like I'm constantly having to make things easier for my child so they can cope, but how do I know if that's helpful or just keeping them anxious?" Fair question. Today we're going to take a close look at the difference between accommodating and enabling. We're also going to hear from our guest, Cindy Thompson, a mom and therapist who has lived through parenting an anxious child and can offer hope for the rest of us now that she's seen what magic coping skills can work in your kid's like as they grow into adulthood.

Show Notes

Anxiety begs us to change our environments so we can avoid the things we're anxious about. And the relief payoff when we do it is huge. No wonder it's just easier to keep moving things around so we can cope. But at what point does this just perpetuate the problem? As caregivers, we're having to assess and make moment to moment decisions about when to make things easier for our kids and when to help them face the challenge, even when it's hard. When we decide to make things easier for them, it often comes with this niggling background thought of "if I keep doing this, how will they ever learn to manage it?". The truth is, anxious kids need some purposeful accommodations but they also need to learn to face things by going through it. We're going to talk about that fine line and how to know where it sits for your kiddo.

Skill-building is key. When you have the tools and you have opportunities to try them out, you start believing in yourself and your ability to face and manage hard situations. As parents you are in a prime position to teach your kids these skills for life. I've built a family-based course with this in mind, so if it's helpful to have someone guide you through the skill-building process and see results for your whole family, give this a try. I want you to walk away with hope that this can and will get better if you dedicate the time and energy into skill building, so I've invited a fellow mom to the conversation who has walked the walk, and has seen amazing outcomes for her now grown kids. Cindy Thompson is holding a light at the end of our tunnels, so don't stop the journey. It can get much better, we promise.

Here's a link to my online course for families called "CBT for the Family: Tools for life". It's a 9 week course designed to build your anxiety-reduction tool kit and you can do it at your own pace from the comfort of your own home.

If you'd like access to the free worksheet that helps you break down anxiety-provoking problems into manageable steps, sign up here and we'll email it to you:

If your child's anxiety presents in the form of anger, check out this talk I did with FamilySmart - you may find this conversation helpful for you:

If you'd like to hear more from our guest, Cindy Thompson, she has her own podcast on resilience that I'd highly recommend checking out:

What is Parenting in the Trenches with Karen Peters?

Hey weary parent. Parenting is a tough gig, but we've got your back. Join child and family therapist, and mom-in-the-trenches, Karen Peters and learn about skills to support you in supporting your kids, while laughing and getting real about the crazy sticky messiness of life with kiddo's.