MARK: Welcome to Happening in Boise, the only podcast that tells you the truth about this city while we're all collectively waiting in a three-mile line for a taco that costs twenty bucks. I'm Mark, and I've spent my entire morning wondering why anyone would choose to live in a place where the air smells like sugar beets one day and pure unadulterated dust the next. It's Monday, June 8, 2026, and if you haven't checked your calendar, we're officially in the season of 'unbearable glare' and 'orange cone dominance'.

JOLEEN: And I'm Joleen, the person who's actually happy to see you, even if I'm deeply cynical about the fact that we're still doing this. We've got a lot of shit to get through today, from federal judges making big decisions in our backyard to the absolute insanity of people keeping literal cat-sized rats in their basements. Boise is changing, folks, and by 'changing' I mean we're basically becoming a weird mix of a Silicon Valley parking lot and a dystopian survivalist fever dream. But hey, at least we have plenty of overpriced wine to distract us, right?

MARK: Exactly. If you can't afford a house, at least you can afford to get drunk in a Botanical Garden once a year. Before we get into the meat of this episode, make sure you like, subscribe, and leave a comment telling us how much you hate the traffic on Eagle Road. We thrive on your bitterness. Also, if you've got a tip or just want to tell us we're assholes, hit us up at boise at the happening network dot com. We actually read those, mostly for the entertainment value of the spelling errors.

JOLEEN: And trust me, some of you really need to use spell-check before you start calling us names. It's embarrassing. Alright, let's kick things off with what's actually going on downtown today, because the federal courthouse is apparently the place to be if you enjoy high-stakes legal drama and protestors with very creative signs. We've got two major federal trials starting today that are basically going to define how miserable some people's lives are for the next decade.

MARK: Yeah, it's a double feature of Idaho's favorite pastime: passing laws that immediately get challenged in court. First up, we've got the trial over Idaho's abortion ban. Judge Winmill is hearing arguments today in a lawsuit filed by Dr. Stacy Seyb and some others who think, you know, maybe doctors shouldn't be afraid of prison for doing their jobs. It's a whole thing. The legal team is basically arguing that people have a right to defend their own lives from medical threats, which seems like a fairly basic concept, but here we are in 2026 still debating it.

JOLEEN: And then, just to keep the vibes truly chaotic, we've got the trial over the new bathroom law. You know, the one that makes it a criminal offense for transgender people to use the bathroom that actually matches their identity. A federal judge was already looking pretty skeptical about it on Friday, basically asking how the hell you even enforce this. Are we going to have 'potty police' stationed outside every stall at the Boise Towne Square? Because I'm sure BPD has nothing better to do than check people's birth certificates while they're trying to pee.

MARK: That's the dream, isn't it? A city where we can't solve the housing crisis, but we can definitely tell you which ceramic bowl to use. It's interesting because the state is basically saying this is about 'privacy,' while the plaintiffs are pointing out that it's unconstitutionally vague and basically a nightmare to implement. I'm sure this trial won't be divisive at all. I give it about three hours before the comment sections on local news sites become a digital landfill of pure rage.

JOLEEN: Oh, they're already there, Mark. People are obsessed. But while the feds are busy with that, the city council actually did something last Tuesday that caught my eye. They're spending one point five million dollars to buy an empty lot on North Cole Road, right next to the mall. Apparently, they want to turn it into affordable housing. I love that the city thinks 'affordable' and 'next to a mall' go together, like you can pay your rent in Cinnabon coupons and leftover Hot Topic inventory.

MARK: Listen, that lot has been sitting there forever. It's about an acre and a half. A developer tried to put 'micro-units' there back in 2021, but that died on the vine, probably because nobody wanted to live in a shoebox where the view is just a Sears loading dock. But now the city's stepping in. They managed to negotiate the price down from two point two million to one point five million, which in Boise terms is basically a coupon. It's a start, I guess, even if it feels like putting a band-aid on a gunshot wound.

JOLEEN: It's totally a band-aid. But hey, if it means a few more service workers can actually live within ten miles of where they work, I'll take it. Moving on to some heavier news, we have an update on that wreck at the Payette River. We mentioned last week that a Dodge Ram went into the water near Cascade. Well, the search and rescue turned into a recovery mission. They found a man's body about three miles downstream over the weekend. It's a shitty ending to a really tragic situation, especially with the river running as fast as it is right now.

MARK: The Payette is no joke in June. People forget that when it's ninety degrees out, that water is still basically liquid ice and moving like a freight train. It's a reminder to not be a dickhead when you're driving those canyon roads. One mistake and you're part of the scenery in the worst way possible. Speaking of being a dickhead, let's talk about the weirdest story hitting the Idaho news feeds this week. Did you see the 'street rat' couple?

JOLEEN: God, yes. I wish I hadn't, but I did. This story broke out of Pennsylvania but it's been all over East Idaho News and our local feeds because it's just so bizarre. This couple, Thomas and Jennifer Busch, were charged after police found hundreds of 'street rats' in their condemned home. And when I say rats, I mean some of them were described as being the size of small cats. I'm not talking about cute little hamsters, Mark. I'm talking about sewer-dwelling, plague-carrying monsters.

MARK: The documents are horrifying. There was a foul odor, which, no shit, there were hundreds of rats. They had black bags over the windows, and police found dead rats in the deep freezer. Jennifer apparently told investigators she was 'caring' for about a hundred and fifty baby rats. Look, I like animals, but if your hobby involves hoarding cat-sized rodents in a house that's already been condemned twice, you've officially lost your privilege to participate in society. That's some next-level psychological shit right there.

JOLEEN: It's a literal nightmare. Imagine being their neighbor. One guy said a rat jumped out of the woods and chased his son on a bike. That's not a pet, that's an apex predator. I hope those neighbors are getting some therapy, because I'd never sleep again. Anyway, let's pivot to something that doesn't involve vermin. Let's talk about the Boise School District. They're really leaning into this bathroom law trial because it directly affects their policies. It's going to be a long summer of meetings and parents screaming at each other, isn't it?

MARK: Always is. The district is already trying to navigate the ten-year facility master plan, dealing with declining enrollment, and now they've got this legal clusterfuck to handle. But on a lighter note, at least the kids can look forward to that new pool at Whitney Elementary opening next summer. The city is still patting themselves on the back for that one. They say seventy-five percent of residents now live within a ten-minute walk of a park. I'm guessing the other twenty-five percent are the ones living in the 'mathematical trap' of the Boise real estate market.

JOLEEN: Oh, the 'mathematical trap.' I love that phrase. It's from a recent real estate report that basically says forty percent of people moving to Idaho right now are making a mistake. The 'Sunshine Tax' is real, folks. Sellers aren't dropping prices even though inventory is technically up, and people are getting stuck in these 'golden handcuffs' where they can't afford to leave their low-interest rate houses but they're drowning in the cost of living here. It's a beautiful trap, isn't it? You get a view of the foothills, but you have to live on ramen and hope your car doesn't break down.

MARK: It's the Boise dream! Pay six hundred thousand dollars for a house that was built in the seventies and hasn't been updated since the Ford administration, then spend your weekends complaining about Micron's expansion making everything more expensive. Speaking of Micron, that project is still the elephant in the room. Every real estate agent in town is using it to justify these insane prices, telling people to buy now before the 'growth wave' hits. It feels a lot like being told to jump on a moving train that's currently on fire.

JOLEEN: And the train is full of construction workers who are all fighting for the same three available apartments in Meridian. It's a mess. But hey, if you're looking for a place to spend the money you don't have, we've got new restaurants! Have you been out to the Boardwalk in Garden City lately? Spitfire Tacos and Tequila just opened their third location there. It's all about spit-fired meats and mezcal. Because if anything can help you forget your mortgage, it's a heavy dose of smoky agave.

MARK: I've heard good things about Spitfire, actually. It's a lot better than some of the other overpriced trash we've seen lately. And over in Eagle, Vessel Kitchen is finally opening its first Idaho location in the Hemingway Building. It's protein-forward, fast-casual stuff. It's basically food for people who wear Lululemon and pretend they're going to hike Table Rock but actually just walk their dog around the Village. It's fresh, it's clean, and it's probably exactly what Eagle wants.

JOLEEN: Eagle is basically just one big Vessel Kitchen at this point. But I'll tell you what, I'm more excited about Solovey Kitchen Cafe opening in Nampa soon. The guy behind it has like three hundred thousand followers on TikTok for his cold-smoked salmon videos. If the food is half as good as the videos look, it might actually be worth the drive to Nampa. Which is saying a lot, because I'd rather walk on glass than drive on I-84 during rush hour.

MARK: Nampa is the new Boise, Joleen. Get with the program. Everyone's moving there because they've been priced out of the North End by people who work for tech companies in Austin. But let's check in on the local sports scene, because the Boise Hawks are actually mid-season right now. They've been playing some decent ball, and we're officially into the heart of the home schedule. They've got that rivalry series against the Idaho Falls Chukars coming up. It's always fun to watch grown men from Idaho Falls get angry about baseball.

JOLEEN: I love the Hawks games, mostly for the cheap beer and the fact that I can ignore the game entirely and just people-watch. They've got a specialty jersey night coming up soon, too. Memorial Stadium is still an absolute dump, but it's our dump. There's something nostalgic about sitting on those benches and feeling the heat radiate off the turf until your soul leaves your body. It's a classic Boise experience.

MARK: It's better than watching the Steelheads, mostly because ice doesn't exist in June. But seriously, the Hawks are worth a look if you've got a free night. Just don't expect a major league experience. It's the Pioneer League. It's raw, it's weird, and sometimes the mascot looks like he's going through an existential crisis. But hey, that's just life in the Treasure Valley. It's authentic.

JOLEEN: Authentic is a nice way to put it. You know what's not authentic? The traffic flow on State Street right now. ACHD has been busy, and not in a good way. They've got the intersection at Pierce Park Lane all torn up. Eastbound traffic is pushed to the south side, westbound is in the middle on new pavement, and the whole thing is just a cluster of orange barrels and confused seniors in Buicks. If you're trying to get through there, just... don't. Find a different way, or just stay home and contemplate your life choices.

MARK: State Street has been a construction site since the dawn of time. I'm convinced it's not actually a road, but a performance art piece about the futility of human progress. And they're starting those 'large patch' programs across the county, too. Basically, they're going to be scraping up perfectly fine roads to fix them until they're slightly worse than before. It's the ACHD way. They've also finished the Boise Avenue bridge project recently, so at least one thing is open, even if it took twice as long as they promised.

JOLEEN: Small victories, Mark. We have to celebrate them. Speaking of celebrations, Savor Idaho happened yesterday. Did you make it out to the Botanical Garden? It was a total zoo. Thirty-five wineries, food trucks, and a bunch of people in sun hats pretending they can taste the difference between a Syrah and a Merlot. They declared 2026 the 'Year of Riesling,' which sounds like a marketing ploy to get rid of a surplus, but people were drinking it like it was water.

MARK: I missed it, mostly because I didn't want to pay eighty-five dollars to stand in a garden and sweat while someone explains 'terroir' to me. I'll save my drinking for the couch where the wine is cheap and the air conditioning is free. But the Boise Flea is coming up this Sunday, June 14. If you want to buy some vintage clothes that smell like a grandmother's attic or some 'handmade' jewelry that's clearly from a kit, that's the place to be. It's always a good time at the warehouse district, though.

JOLEEN: The Flea is great for finding weird shit you don't need. I once found a ceramic cat that looked exactly like my ex. I didn't buy it, but it was a haunting experience. It's a good way to spend a Sunday morning before the heat really kicks in. And speaking of heat, let's look at this weather forecast for the week of June 8 to June 15. It's looking like we're heading straight into the blast furnace, folks.

MARK: Yeah, today we're looking at a high around eighty-eight, which is basically the last 'nice' day we're going to have for a while. Tomorrow, Tuesday, it jumps into the low nineties. Wednesday and Thursday are going to be absolute scorchers, with highs hitting ninety-four. If you have a lawn, it's already dead, just accept it. We might get a break on Saturday with some patchy rain and a high of sixty-eight, which sounds like a miracle, but it'll probably just turn the dust into a fine layer of mud on your car.

JOLEEN: I'll take the sixty-eight degrees over the ninety-four any day. I am not built for this heat. I basically turn into a puddle of sarcasm and sweat the second it hits eighty-five. But by next Monday, the fifteenth, we're right back up to eighty-two. So, enjoy that weird little rainy dip on Saturday while you can. It's the only time you'll be able to breathe without feeling like you're inhaling a hair dryer.

MARK: It's the classic Idaho swing. Freezing one minute, boiling the next, and always, always dry. Seriously, use some moisturizer, people. You're starting to look like old luggage. Anyway, that's the bulk of what we've got for you today. It's a busy week in Boise, whether you're watching federal judges decide our future or just trying to navigate the minefield of construction on your way to get a spit-fired taco.

JOLEEN: It really is. Just remember to be patient with each other out there. Or don't. Honestly, a little road rage keeps things interesting. But if you do have something to say to us, or if you've seen a cat-sized rat roaming your neighborhood, please send us an email. We need the content. You can reach us at boise at the happening network dot com. And don't forget to like and subscribe on whatever platform you're using to hide from your boss right now.

MARK: Yeah, your boss knows you're listening to a podcast. They just don't care because they're doing the same thing. We'll be back later this week to talk more about the trial outcomes and whatever other nonsense this city decides to throw at us. Stay hydrated, stay cynical, and for the love of god, stop keeping rats in your freezer. It's disgusting.

JOLEEN: Seriously, that's the one takeaway from today. No freezer rats. Thanks for listening to Happening in Boise. We'll talk to you soon, assuming we don't melt in the ninety-four-degree heat by Wednesday. Have a good one, Boise. Try not to let the orange cones win.

MARK: They always win, Joleen. They always win. See ya.