1 00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:11,580 You're listening to the coach approach with Diane Ravenscroft, whether 2 00:00:11,580 --> 00:00:16,050 you're an entrepreneur, an ambitious employee or someone interested 3 00:00:16,055 --> 00:00:20,640 in getting the most out of every connection, responsive communication is. 4 00:00:21,030 --> 00:00:23,700 Join management and learning specialist, Dr. 5 00:00:23,700 --> 00:00:27,600 Diane Ravenscroft, as she gives you the tools to improve any 6 00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:32,220 relationship that matters to your business, your career and your life. 7 00:00:32,580 --> 00:00:33,090 All right. 8 00:00:33,270 --> 00:00:34,140 Here's Diane. 9 00:00:34,410 --> 00:00:38,269 I am Diane Ravenscroft and you are listening to the coach approach podcast. 10 00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:45,210 The coach approach is a mindset and a skill set with steps to achieve, avoid and 11 00:00:45,210 --> 00:00:50,010 celebrate along the way towards responsive leadership and improved relationships. 12 00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:54,989 Today, I will share stories about real people who did and did not recognize 13 00:00:54,995 --> 00:01:00,510 the importance of words to lead, engage, inspire, and motivate their teams. 14 00:01:01,214 --> 00:01:04,724 I have attended so many meetings with different kinds of leaders and 15 00:01:04,724 --> 00:01:09,615 individuals that I can now offer the coach approach podcasts to provide listeners 16 00:01:09,765 --> 00:01:14,355 opportunities, to learn and grow through other people's stories, other people's 17 00:01:14,355 --> 00:01:19,725 decisions, other people's mistakes, missed opportunities and success. 18 00:01:20,355 --> 00:01:25,095 These podcasts offer moments to consider other people's perspectives 19 00:01:25,155 --> 00:01:28,335 and explore our thinking about leadership and communication. 20 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:32,774 Working in the field of organizational psychology has created numerous 21 00:01:32,774 --> 00:01:38,175 opportunities for me to observe research and see patterns in attitudes, 22 00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:43,994 aptitudes, and behaviors, especially communication and leadership styles. 23 00:01:44,700 --> 00:01:48,510 After 20 years, enough time has passed that I get to write and share 24 00:01:48,510 --> 00:01:50,700 about situations and scenarios. 25 00:01:51,060 --> 00:01:55,950 You can benefit from my experiences, my expertise, and the lessons learned 26 00:01:55,950 --> 00:02:00,420 from numerous hardworking people wanting to contribute in their workplaces. 27 00:02:00,945 --> 00:02:04,665 I can tell these stories so that nobody can detect a person or place. 28 00:02:05,025 --> 00:02:09,074 And in the absence of non-disclosure agreements, I am free to focus 29 00:02:09,074 --> 00:02:12,975 on describing the effectiveness of the coach approach from real 30 00:02:13,035 --> 00:02:15,345 situations with great people. 31 00:02:16,185 --> 00:02:18,165 Of course, I'll disguise identities. 32 00:02:19,230 --> 00:02:22,980 At times I may single out certain professions that tend to attract people 33 00:02:22,980 --> 00:02:28,170 with fixed attitudes, like optimism and pessimism, for example, but I will 34 00:02:28,170 --> 00:02:30,959 do my best not to generalize today. 35 00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:34,019 I will introduce you to a techie and a few engineers. 36 00:02:34,875 --> 00:02:38,655 The cybersecurity leader referred to himself as having entered his 37 00:02:38,655 --> 00:02:41,535 profession as an optimistic techie. 38 00:02:41,715 --> 00:02:46,665 He explained that after several years in his new leadership role, he had developed 39 00:02:46,665 --> 00:02:49,945 a mindset grounded in hyper vigilance. 40 00:02:51,285 --> 00:02:53,925 I asked how he would define this state. 41 00:02:54,135 --> 00:02:59,025 He told me to picture a boxing ring and one boxer dodging hedging and 42 00:02:59,025 --> 00:03:03,015 ducking while the other boxer was incessantly pounding away at his head. 43 00:03:03,435 --> 00:03:09,795 He felt he didn't relate to some of his employees, the dreamers, he called them. 44 00:03:10,304 --> 00:03:13,725 He needed dreamers to innovate and develop new products. 45 00:03:13,725 --> 00:03:18,165 And it was part of his role as chief technology officer to inspire the team 46 00:03:18,170 --> 00:03:23,415 by leading weekly meetings and hearing from everyone, the optimistic techie. 47 00:03:23,475 --> 00:03:26,595 Remember, that's how he described himself, explained his 48 00:03:26,595 --> 00:03:28,725 perspective and feelings this way. 49 00:03:29,084 --> 00:03:29,834 Quote. 50 00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:35,180 Remember, I ask people if I can write down what they say, when it's striking 51 00:03:36,270 --> 00:03:41,340 quote, imagine needing to create lofty goals, to inspire collaboration around 52 00:03:41,340 --> 00:03:43,829 division and strategy two hours a week. 53 00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:48,570 When most of your day, every day is about avoiding the potential next bad 54 00:03:48,570 --> 00:03:51,510 virus waiting to attack your network. 55 00:03:52,380 --> 00:03:56,490 He continued, I feel like a superhero most of the time, and 56 00:03:56,490 --> 00:03:58,950 my people are my superpowers. 57 00:03:59,355 --> 00:04:02,655 We're protecting people from the harm, bad actors wanna inflict 58 00:04:02,655 --> 00:04:04,485 on our systems and organization. 59 00:04:04,785 --> 00:04:10,125 And we need to find new ways to keep our customers safe all the time. 60 00:04:10,725 --> 00:04:14,085 I need to figure out a way to call back the dreamer in me. 61 00:04:14,090 --> 00:04:16,635 He said that was first drawn to it. 62 00:04:17,415 --> 00:04:21,885 Then I might be able to relate to my team again, end quote, 63 00:04:22,215 --> 00:04:23,505 and you know who you are. 64 00:04:23,895 --> 00:04:28,385 I hope I did your statements justice, as I repeated your powerful words. 65 00:04:30,150 --> 00:04:37,409 These very challenges stated succinctly by this chief technology officer are exactly 66 00:04:37,409 --> 00:04:39,539 why the coach approach is relevant. 67 00:04:40,169 --> 00:04:44,280 The coach approach is ultimately about transformational communication. 68 00:04:44,940 --> 00:04:48,570 This leader had all the elements of an inspirational speaker. 69 00:04:48,570 --> 00:04:53,400 And I told him this yet, he lacked the ability to see his talents 70 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:58,859 and natural aptitude to encourage based on feeling pretty burned out. 71 00:04:58,919 --> 00:05:03,210 A lot of the time he was burdened, he was bogged down. 72 00:05:03,750 --> 00:05:07,289 He felt buried under the weight of the responsibility. 73 00:05:09,465 --> 00:05:14,745 The key was that he believed his people were his superpowers. 74 00:05:14,745 --> 00:05:18,765 Did you notice that with this genuine appreciation for his team 75 00:05:19,125 --> 00:05:23,295 expressing his gratitude for their diligence in descriptive ways became 76 00:05:23,300 --> 00:05:25,365 his weekly meeting, starting point. 77 00:05:25,815 --> 00:05:33,075 He started to learn the shift to seek higher ideals and fix his thinking. 78 00:05:33,989 --> 00:05:37,979 Week after week, he built trust and camaraderie by going around 79 00:05:37,979 --> 00:05:41,489 the table, pointing out how each person made a difference. 80 00:05:42,630 --> 00:05:48,479 He pointed out the ways they handled real situations with finesse. 81 00:05:49,289 --> 00:05:52,950 He also started collecting anonymous comments left in the break room 82 00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:57,580 and read emails from customers and coworkers out loud in the meetings. 83 00:05:57,975 --> 00:06:01,605 These became talking points that were used to troubleshoot challenges 84 00:06:01,605 --> 00:06:05,805 and think of new ways to tackle incoming, known, and unknown threats. 85 00:06:06,225 --> 00:06:11,175 You have to anticipate unknowns in his and other businesses slowly. 86 00:06:11,175 --> 00:06:16,185 It became natural to rise above the daily grind to notice the small ways 87 00:06:16,185 --> 00:06:18,465 people were making a big difference. 88 00:06:19,365 --> 00:06:22,665 Someone came up with the idea of creating a banner, having t-shirt. 89 00:06:23,234 --> 00:06:24,255 And using the phrase. 90 00:06:24,315 --> 00:06:27,914 Thank you for all the ways you are making a big difference. 91 00:06:28,484 --> 00:06:31,335 Initially, it was thank you for all the small ways you were making 92 00:06:31,340 --> 00:06:34,604 a big difference, but this leader didn't want to sound like he was 93 00:06:34,604 --> 00:06:36,465 undermining or minimizing effort. 94 00:06:37,515 --> 00:06:43,994 What was crucial for morale that I took a note of was that any total money spent on 95 00:06:43,994 --> 00:06:50,054 these trinkets, he called them like the t-shirts was also given as a bonus or by 96 00:06:50,054 --> 00:06:52,784 choice matched as a donation to charity. 97 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:59,159 Whatever the employee preferred, not a single t-shirt, but the entire spend. 98 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:02,969 So if the total of their motivational items was, let's say 99 00:07:02,974 --> 00:07:09,630 $900 each person received or could donate all or some of $2,700. 100 00:07:11,355 --> 00:07:15,525 How did I jump from nine to 2,700 while the leader wanted to convey that each 101 00:07:15,525 --> 00:07:20,445 person's contribution was worth not one or two, but three times the investment 102 00:07:20,685 --> 00:07:25,605 not only was recognition now, a priority, but rewards, including financial rewards, 103 00:07:26,715 --> 00:07:29,445 the optics of spending money on stuff. 104 00:07:29,605 --> 00:07:34,845 When people could use a financial reward was not lost on this leader, he became 105 00:07:34,845 --> 00:07:39,675 sensitive and attuned to what mattered most to his people because he asked them. 106 00:07:41,039 --> 00:07:46,380 Affirmation is transformational awareness is transformational. 107 00:07:47,340 --> 00:07:50,940 If using affirmation and descriptive praise is your norm. 108 00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:52,049 You know what I mean? 109 00:07:52,770 --> 00:07:56,549 If people trust you and believe you, you will have a tremendous 110 00:07:56,549 --> 00:07:58,289 impact with your descriptive praise. 111 00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:01,710 If you're uncertain, whether people will trust and believe 112 00:08:01,710 --> 00:08:03,299 you, the coach approaches for you. 113 00:08:03,450 --> 00:08:07,080 Descriptive praise is powerful as it is an opportunity to teach what 114 00:08:07,080 --> 00:08:11,909 was done well, and also create a conversation that feels affirming. 115 00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:16,830 It's a learned skill, and of course is a significant aspect of the coach 116 00:08:16,835 --> 00:08:20,549 approach through praise stated sincere. 117 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:25,080 The chief technology officers team was becoming more receptive 118 00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:29,610 to feedback and less resistant to correction through affirmation. 119 00:08:30,450 --> 00:08:34,650 People still needed instructed and guided of course, but with the momentum 120 00:08:34,655 --> 00:08:38,430 building through loyalty and trust, people were becoming more willing to 121 00:08:38,435 --> 00:08:43,170 share their biggest challenges without fear of repercussions or criticism, 122 00:08:43,830 --> 00:08:46,050 the gotcha factor disappeared. 123 00:08:46,980 --> 00:08:51,240 They added business continuity strategies to their product lines and services. 124 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:53,370 And even turnover was reduced. 125 00:08:54,180 --> 00:08:58,920 The business expanded its market share and was poised to scale their services. 126 00:08:59,910 --> 00:09:02,430 The leadership team adopted the descriptive praise 127 00:09:02,435 --> 00:09:04,170 approach with their teams. 128 00:09:04,230 --> 00:09:07,920 And as far as everyone is concerned, the company is set up for future success. 129 00:09:08,580 --> 00:09:12,620 You can measure these things and I can show you how. 130 00:09:13,155 --> 00:09:18,315 Remember, this individual's significant change that he wondered if it would 131 00:09:18,315 --> 00:09:23,925 be small, that felt daunting at the time, the superhero who didn't relate 132 00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:29,805 to dreamers, he wanted to find ways to understand and connect with his dreamers. 133 00:09:30,495 --> 00:09:35,085 He did it, they did it finding opportunities to connect in meaningful 134 00:09:35,085 --> 00:09:40,125 ways, spread thoughtfulness and innovation through the entire company. 135 00:09:41,130 --> 00:09:41,580 To me. 136 00:09:41,585 --> 00:09:45,150 This is both inspirational and transformational, attentive, 137 00:09:45,150 --> 00:09:49,020 supportive leaders who affirm and cheer us on are quite rare. 138 00:09:49,680 --> 00:09:52,980 If you work for somebody who looks for opportunities to be descriptive in 139 00:09:52,980 --> 00:09:55,800 their praise, you are very fortunate. 140 00:09:56,220 --> 00:10:02,310 I hope you know that this cautious it leader was a breath of fresh air. 141 00:10:03,090 --> 00:10:06,570 He was ready to explore the traits, steps and challenges 142 00:10:06,575 --> 00:10:08,340 required of the coach approach. 143 00:10:09,300 --> 00:10:12,960 One of the first lessons of transformational communication is the 144 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:17,310 awareness that people come to work for the most part, wired a certain 145 00:10:17,315 --> 00:10:22,500 way as they tackle challenges and opportunities to yield results. 146 00:10:23,310 --> 00:10:26,850 If you work for someone wired to acknowledge your strengths, 147 00:10:27,090 --> 00:10:30,690 you might not be able to imagine reporting to someone who views your 148 00:10:30,690 --> 00:10:33,210 aspirational outlook as an impediment. 149 00:10:34,260 --> 00:10:38,520 I've seen this all or nothing mindset discourage the most resilient person. 150 00:10:39,420 --> 00:10:44,430 The first time I met someone who viewed an aspirational outlook as an impediment, 151 00:10:44,520 --> 00:10:46,770 I had to ask them to repeat themselves. 152 00:10:47,490 --> 00:10:51,329 I literally remember losing my composure and saying, what did you say? 153 00:10:52,079 --> 00:10:54,750 Normally, as a coach, you stay fairly composed. 154 00:10:55,350 --> 00:10:58,830 There are guidelines through the international coaching Federation. 155 00:10:58,830 --> 00:11:02,850 There are ethical guidelines and competencies. 156 00:11:03,390 --> 00:11:06,720 And I remember the day a leader said to me that these people were 157 00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:11,100 toxically positive and he viewed their aspirational outlook as an impediment. 158 00:11:11,105 --> 00:11:16,320 And I said, what did you say as opposed to, could you explain that for me please? 159 00:11:17,490 --> 00:11:19,320 Or something with more poise? 160 00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:23,400 As I said, I've seen this all or nothing mindset discourage 161 00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:24,810 the most resilient person. 162 00:11:25,230 --> 00:11:28,560 As I introduce my coach approach through these podcasts. 163 00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:32,820 I want to emphasize that this model of communication and leadership isn't 164 00:11:32,820 --> 00:11:37,380 focused on trying to change attitudes, though, I will discuss attitude. 165 00:11:37,650 --> 00:11:41,040 How could I not attitude can often be permanent though. 166 00:11:41,070 --> 00:11:42,720 And set early in life. 167 00:11:43,110 --> 00:11:47,490 Attitude is often expressed as glass, half full thinking, the optimist 168 00:11:47,730 --> 00:11:49,560 and glass half empty thinking. 169 00:11:49,620 --> 00:11:54,360 The pessimist, the coach approach instead is about improving aptitude. 170 00:11:55,469 --> 00:11:58,770 Aptitude is about our capacity to learn. 171 00:11:59,550 --> 00:12:01,319 Aptitude is changeable. 172 00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:05,430 And as my French speaking, clients would say, aptitude is malleable. 173 00:12:05,459 --> 00:12:06,810 Love that word malleable. 174 00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:09,689 When you, when you say malleable, hold your hands. 175 00:12:09,689 --> 00:12:12,900 As if you're sculpting with clay and you get the idea of how 176 00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:18,150 aptitude can expand, one's thinking to create endless possibilities. 177 00:12:19,140 --> 00:12:22,319 A change in aptitude can produce a change in results. 178 00:12:23,025 --> 00:12:27,735 An aptitude for lifelong learning offers potential to stay curious and 179 00:12:27,735 --> 00:12:33,225 never stop learning, to challenge ourselves an aptitude to resistance. 180 00:12:33,225 --> 00:12:37,635 On the other hand, and reluctance offers skepticism and hesitation 181 00:12:37,995 --> 00:12:41,385 hesitation to try new ways to relate or connect with people. 182 00:12:42,435 --> 00:12:45,435 Aptitude, like attitude can go one way or the other. 183 00:12:46,365 --> 00:12:50,444 When we tackle improving aptitude attitude may just change. 184 00:12:51,705 --> 00:12:54,225 The coach approach focuses on what's possible. 185 00:12:54,495 --> 00:12:55,215 Excellent. 186 00:12:55,365 --> 00:12:59,475 And uniquely an idea you may not have heard before my excellence 187 00:12:59,565 --> 00:13:01,455 of avoidance exception. 188 00:13:02,325 --> 00:13:02,925 Yes. 189 00:13:03,225 --> 00:13:07,665 Excellence of avoidance, this new kind of excellence. 190 00:13:08,655 --> 00:13:09,675 I'll say it again. 191 00:13:09,675 --> 00:13:14,505 Excellence through avoidance is also a key part of my coach approach. 192 00:13:15,150 --> 00:13:18,569 When an exception is in place for how to describe a typical vision. 193 00:13:18,780 --> 00:13:23,219 I emphasize the importance of achievement and aspirational statements, 194 00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:25,560 these motivate and build trust. 195 00:13:25,620 --> 00:13:30,449 But many years ago, I met people whose mission is to prevent and protect like 196 00:13:30,449 --> 00:13:32,670 the chief technology officer we just met. 197 00:13:33,630 --> 00:13:38,849 So I introduce you to a realistic engineer, his words so far, 198 00:13:39,270 --> 00:13:41,339 you've met an optimistic techie. 199 00:13:41,579 --> 00:13:43,860 Now meet a realistic engineer. 200 00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:49,050 This leader's main job in a utility company is not to poison people. 201 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:54,930 Remember he described himself as a realist and works basically with water. 202 00:13:55,439 --> 00:13:58,890 So his main job is to not poison people plain and simple. 203 00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:00,360 That's what he told me. 204 00:14:01,020 --> 00:14:03,180 I was invited to present management training. 205 00:14:03,209 --> 00:14:06,060 So I asked for the mission statement in advance to prepare 206 00:14:06,060 --> 00:14:07,770 and customize the learning program. 207 00:14:08,370 --> 00:14:12,300 Remember the days when not everybody had a website, it's really not that long. 208 00:14:13,410 --> 00:14:16,620 The president of the utility company shared the formal mission that 209 00:14:16,620 --> 00:14:21,060 the public sees on their materials then quietly told me that the real 210 00:14:21,060 --> 00:14:23,760 mission is not to poison people. 211 00:14:24,390 --> 00:14:27,089 This is excellence through avoidance, for sure. 212 00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:31,860 A vision stated in negative terms under any other circumstances might not 213 00:14:31,860 --> 00:14:36,689 seem aspirational, but as the provider of clean water, I remain in complete 214 00:14:36,689 --> 00:14:41,790 agreement that not poisoning people is a wonderful vision to achieve and maintain. 215 00:14:42,270 --> 00:14:45,870 Like other engineers who don't want bridges to collapse or surgeons 216 00:14:45,870 --> 00:14:49,860 who don't want anyone to die on their operating table, excellence 217 00:14:49,860 --> 00:14:51,600 through avoidance is important. 218 00:14:52,469 --> 00:14:55,500 So the next time you hear a vision stated in the negative, don't 219 00:14:55,500 --> 00:15:00,069 write people off as negative great people demonstrating resilience 220 00:15:00,510 --> 00:15:04,589 like law enforcement professionals need to be careful out there. 221 00:15:05,370 --> 00:15:08,760 Just like that statement on hill street, blues, that old. 222 00:15:09,585 --> 00:15:10,755 TV sitcom. 223 00:15:11,385 --> 00:15:16,185 We can be careful out there and do our best by avoiding danger, 224 00:15:17,025 --> 00:15:18,225 the coach approach mindset. 225 00:15:18,225 --> 00:15:21,825 Doesn't judge the person for the words they use to express their purpose 226 00:15:22,575 --> 00:15:26,595 engineers in particular, look out for safety and yes, that can sound negative. 227 00:15:27,255 --> 00:15:30,735 The coach approach exists to make sure if the way you describe 228 00:15:30,735 --> 00:15:32,565 your words sounds negative. 229 00:15:32,835 --> 00:15:35,055 People don't perceive you as such. 230 00:15:35,685 --> 00:15:36,525 It can be subtle. 231 00:15:36,555 --> 00:15:37,905 So here's some examples. 232 00:15:39,495 --> 00:15:44,145 A passionate leader said, quote, I'm going to show you how broken our system is. 233 00:15:44,415 --> 00:15:44,985 End quote. 234 00:15:45,825 --> 00:15:49,935 I'm going to show you how broken our system is, depending 235 00:15:49,940 --> 00:15:51,315 on who is in the room. 236 00:15:51,825 --> 00:15:56,625 This leader committed to exactness and precision may be appreciated for their 237 00:15:56,625 --> 00:15:59,295 attention to detail and directness. 238 00:15:59,955 --> 00:16:03,095 I am gonna show you how broken our system is. 239 00:16:04,395 --> 00:16:08,805 Now, put this person with individuals more focused on harmony and wellbeing. 240 00:16:09,195 --> 00:16:13,845 And listen again, I am going to show you how broken our system is. 241 00:16:15,735 --> 00:16:17,625 How do you perceive this person? 242 00:16:19,305 --> 00:16:24,285 They came with solutions, but how do you perceive them learning to be measured 243 00:16:24,285 --> 00:16:28,605 in our communication is an important skill and ties closely to motivation 244 00:16:28,965 --> 00:16:31,305 ties to stamina and overall wellbeing. 245 00:16:31,905 --> 00:16:35,685 The coach approach is a means towards learning transformational 246 00:16:35,895 --> 00:16:41,655 communication, and also not writing people off for sounding 247 00:16:41,655 --> 00:16:44,085 thorough or being problem solvers. 248 00:16:44,895 --> 00:16:49,605 If I have a broken system, I want somebody to show me how broken my system 249 00:16:49,605 --> 00:16:52,425 is and bring me the solutions to fix it. 250 00:16:54,345 --> 00:16:59,175 As we adjust to our listener, we might ask. 251 00:16:59,745 --> 00:17:04,425 In an organization that focuses, let's say on harmony and wellbeing, 252 00:17:04,935 --> 00:17:07,575 we might ask, is this correct? 253 00:17:08,355 --> 00:17:11,145 Instead of declaring outright, this is a mistake. 254 00:17:12,105 --> 00:17:17,085 I have been in meetings where harmony and wellbeing is part of the culture. 255 00:17:17,145 --> 00:17:18,885 Very high up on the culture. 256 00:17:19,305 --> 00:17:25,545 People seek meaningful work, but things go wrong in any organization in any team. 257 00:17:26,175 --> 00:17:28,875 The person who came into the meeting declaring outright. 258 00:17:28,875 --> 00:17:32,595 This is a mistake who knew that money was being lost. 259 00:17:32,835 --> 00:17:34,515 Who knew that revenue was leaving. 260 00:17:34,515 --> 00:17:40,035 The organization was not well received after some coaching, the 261 00:17:40,035 --> 00:17:47,325 person reapproached met with people again and said, I have noticed some 262 00:17:47,325 --> 00:17:51,195 data presented the data and asked. 263 00:17:51,975 --> 00:17:57,105 Is this correct by tailoring the message to the people and the situation. 264 00:17:57,465 --> 00:18:03,045 The listeners were much more receptive, attentive, and engaged. 265 00:18:03,825 --> 00:18:07,065 She got their attention by reframing. 266 00:18:07,245 --> 00:18:09,825 The words seems pretty simple. 267 00:18:10,215 --> 00:18:13,215 This is a mistake as opposed to is this correct? 268 00:18:13,815 --> 00:18:18,765 One produces defensiveness, the other cooperation and engage. 269 00:18:20,070 --> 00:18:24,210 As we learn to tailor our message to people in situations, we become more 270 00:18:24,210 --> 00:18:29,100 effective and responsive as leaders and as communicators because the 271 00:18:29,100 --> 00:18:31,169 coach approach is about aptitude. 272 00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:35,850 People focus on getting the most out of every relationship, particularly 273 00:18:35,850 --> 00:18:37,649 through building meaningful connections. 274 00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:40,740 The individual, when asking is this correct? 275 00:18:41,190 --> 00:18:46,110 As opposed to stating this is a mistake built, meaningful connections. 276 00:18:46,650 --> 00:18:50,640 My happy place is facilitating these kinds of situations that have a positive 277 00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:52,950 impact, a transformational impact. 278 00:18:52,950 --> 00:18:56,640 In fact, and I have been fortunate to do this work through teaching 279 00:18:56,820 --> 00:19:01,470 coaching curriculum, design and consulting for more than two decades. 280 00:19:01,830 --> 00:19:05,310 I have coached entrepreneurs and sales people as well as 281 00:19:05,315 --> 00:19:07,290 engineers and compliance officers. 282 00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:11,910 Most often in finance, manufacturing, technology, and insurance, 283 00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:14,010 what has remained consistent? 284 00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:19,860 No matter the situation or context is that most entrepreneurs and sales people 285 00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:25,320 are wired, possibly hardwired more towards accomplishment, achievement. 286 00:19:25,350 --> 00:19:30,420 And what's possible that may not surprise you didn't surprise me yet. 287 00:19:30,810 --> 00:19:35,370 What did surprise me is this thinking can present a challenge for any go 288 00:19:35,370 --> 00:19:40,830 getter who as an optimist at heart is possibly viewed as an obstacle. 289 00:19:41,175 --> 00:19:45,915 To people wire differently towards caution hesitation or hypervigilance. 290 00:19:46,215 --> 00:19:50,685 Some of my cautious clients tell me optimist sound, toxically, positive. 291 00:19:50,955 --> 00:19:53,205 They sound unrealistic and full of. 292 00:19:53,205 --> 00:19:54,885 Let's say hot air. 293 00:19:55,455 --> 00:19:56,505 I can understand that. 294 00:19:57,195 --> 00:20:01,365 See how easy it is to judge the person by their words, if this happens. 295 00:20:01,365 --> 00:20:04,575 And I think it does, it's even more important to consider the what, 296 00:20:04,785 --> 00:20:07,335 when, how and why of what we say. 297 00:20:07,785 --> 00:20:09,345 I know it's easier said than done. 298 00:20:09,900 --> 00:20:15,180 I know that's probably a pun, but it's true because in the high pace demanding 299 00:20:15,180 --> 00:20:19,770 environments where my clients work, one of my roles is to remind leaders, to remember 300 00:20:19,775 --> 00:20:25,110 the people amid the focus on products and processes, especially in engineering 301 00:20:25,110 --> 00:20:30,450 environments, manufacturing and finance process gets a lot of attention. 302 00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:34,050 It's easy for the needs of people to disappear when products 303 00:20:34,050 --> 00:20:35,940 and process needs attention. 304 00:20:36,465 --> 00:20:39,975 The more intense, the demands of process improvement and product development. 305 00:20:39,975 --> 00:20:42,435 The more likely people's needs become ignored. 306 00:20:42,824 --> 00:20:46,574 The coach approach helps break down all or nothing thinking to expose 307 00:20:46,574 --> 00:20:48,435 and explore scarcity mindset. 308 00:20:48,764 --> 00:20:53,235 A scarcity mindset will discourage demotivate or even demoralize 309 00:20:53,235 --> 00:20:57,405 the people wired to hope, help and achieve in every workplace. 310 00:20:57,405 --> 00:20:58,524 We know there's a culture. 311 00:20:59,505 --> 00:21:04,365 Some people set a tone of a sense of urgency, which can create all kinds of 312 00:21:04,365 --> 00:21:07,395 situations that inspire or inflame people. 313 00:21:07,875 --> 00:21:11,475 Some people love a sense of urgency, keeps them moving, keeps them going, 314 00:21:11,865 --> 00:21:13,665 gives the momentum and traction. 315 00:21:13,935 --> 00:21:19,155 Other people sense of urgency creates panic and uncertainty and 316 00:21:19,395 --> 00:21:21,405 feels very demanding and oppressive. 317 00:21:21,915 --> 00:21:26,175 Many workplaces are seeking to create communities where everyone is welcome 318 00:21:26,180 --> 00:21:27,705 and feels a sense of belonging. 319 00:21:28,875 --> 00:21:31,995 I don't know what you would describe your workplace as, I don't know how 320 00:21:31,995 --> 00:21:35,145 you would describe your culture, but every workplace has one. 321 00:21:35,715 --> 00:21:40,725 As a coach, I invite people to ask more of themselves. 322 00:21:41,205 --> 00:21:44,745 I also recognize and relate to how difficult it may be for leaders to 323 00:21:44,745 --> 00:21:49,145 shift their mindset, to relate to and connect with everyone they serve. 324 00:21:49,830 --> 00:21:55,020 Observant leaders recognize that morale suffers when the pressures 325 00:21:55,020 --> 00:22:00,150 of work are allowed to foster a negative culture, observant leaders 326 00:22:00,360 --> 00:22:02,160 recognize that morale suffers. 327 00:22:02,165 --> 00:22:07,270 When the pressures of work are allowed to foster a negative culture, feeling 328 00:22:07,330 --> 00:22:12,120 overwhelmed can start to override a person's capacity to think big. 329 00:22:12,510 --> 00:22:13,950 I have been there. 330 00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:16,140 I'm guessing you have. 331 00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:21,090 The chief technology officer and engineers learned how to share concerns 332 00:22:21,149 --> 00:22:27,540 and potential in a way that conveyed assurance trust and support these learned 333 00:22:27,540 --> 00:22:30,719 skills, prevent a scarcity mindset. 334 00:22:31,889 --> 00:22:33,389 Should a scarcity mindset. 335 00:22:33,389 --> 00:22:37,590 Start to creep into thinking over time, a negative outlook, blurs, 336 00:22:37,590 --> 00:22:39,239 potential and possibilities. 337 00:22:39,239 --> 00:22:39,810 Fade away. 338 00:22:40,290 --> 00:22:41,379 I speak from experience. 339 00:22:42,750 --> 00:22:48,780 Don't allow, please a scarcity mindset to creep into thinking, because 340 00:22:48,780 --> 00:22:52,530 over time, a negative outlook will blur potential and possibilities 341 00:22:52,530 --> 00:22:55,620 will fade away in stark contrast. 342 00:22:55,620 --> 00:23:01,080 Children are curious and have a tremendous capacity for imagination. 343 00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:05,910 You often hear visionaries speak about the importance of innovation. 344 00:23:06,750 --> 00:23:11,670 I think innovation is simply imagination paired with new ways of 345 00:23:11,670 --> 00:23:13,410 creating something out of nothing. 346 00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:19,020 I want to make an impact by bringing back curiosity, imagination, 347 00:23:19,470 --> 00:23:22,140 inspiration, and motivation to work. 348 00:23:22,650 --> 00:23:23,940 Let's be HAPPI again. 349 00:23:23,940 --> 00:23:25,500 Let's be happier again. 350 00:23:25,980 --> 00:23:29,460 Let's enjoy our work more to be competitive. 351 00:23:29,460 --> 00:23:31,020 We must have stamina. 352 00:23:31,380 --> 00:23:35,520 And if you love what you do with people who share the same commitment and passion. 353 00:23:35,909 --> 00:23:37,409 We will enjoy our work again. 354 00:23:38,189 --> 00:23:38,970 What is that phrase? 355 00:23:38,970 --> 00:23:42,060 If you love what you do, you'd do it for nothing, something like that. 356 00:23:42,960 --> 00:23:44,010 So let's make it happen. 357 00:23:44,429 --> 00:23:48,480 That's one of the goals of the coach approach working together and 358 00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:50,490 enjoying the work in each other. 359 00:23:51,389 --> 00:23:52,199 It's possible. 360 00:23:52,980 --> 00:23:53,460 I've seen it. 361 00:23:54,245 --> 00:23:59,045 Next time we meet, I will share more stories and anecdotes based on real 362 00:23:59,045 --> 00:24:01,475 people applying the coach approach. 363 00:24:02,375 --> 00:24:03,335 I am Diane. 364 00:24:03,335 --> 00:24:05,585 Ravenscroft see you next time. 365 00:24:05,825 --> 00:24:06,785 Thanks for listening.