Booth Parker: Today on MOM-enomics, I am going to talk about time.
So several months ago, I co-founded an organization called the
Carolina Women's Collective.
And we have hosted several power hours over the last few months where women get
together and they network and they talk about struggles they are facing with
their life, their business, their career.
And there have been several topics that seem to be on repeat and one of those
is time management: getting it all on the calendar, getting it all done.
So maybe you are one of those that need to reclaim your day and or
get your calendar back on track.
And that is what we're going to tackle today.
Kind of reclaiming the way your day looks and how you get all the tasks done.
I have always been a planner.
It's just my nature.
So time management is a topic that I am very passionate about, but I
also feel like I have done a good job with my own time management over the
last several decades, with work and motherhood and family and all the things.
So us mamas, we feel the pressure to get all the things done.
We have to be everything to everyone, and we often put ourselves last and
we feel overwhelmed and exhausted and like we aren't getting anything done
right because we are stretched too thin.
Kind of like the airplane where they say to put the mask, the
oxygen mask, on yourself first before assisting those around you.
And the reason for that is because if you're already passed
out, you aren't going to be any good to the ones around you.
So I always try to remind mamas that taking care of ourselves is important.
You don't want to get stretched too thin or else everything kind of falls apart.
So, some of us mamas work because we want to or we enjoy it.
Some of us work to help provide for our families.
And then there are some moms that are the sole provider for their families.
So this why, the why you are working, can often dictate what has to be done
each day and how much time that takes.
So, some may only work 20 hours a week, some may work 40, some may
have to work even more than that.
And if you are someone that say has to work 40 hours a week outside the home,
then trying to be the "Room Mom," as they're called for your child's class,
is probably not something that's going to align or be able to fit right now.
And that's when we have to pause and ask ourselves, "How can I be the most
present with my family and my kids in the amount of time I have available?"
So, there's only so many hours in a day and so how can I be the most present?
How can I get the most valuable time out of the time I have?
So where do you even start if you are suffering from time overwhelm and you're
trying to get your calendar back on track?
So I like to do an audit of my calendar, and the word audit can
have a lot of negative connotations, but in this instance, it's going
to give us really good information.
If you are someone that keeps a very detailed planner, then you could
probably go back over the last couple of weeks and do an audit that way.
Truth of the matter is, most people don't have a planner that detailed where they've
written down everything they've done over the last few weeks, so this audit
is going to have to be kind of a going forward over the next couple of weeks.
And it's important to remember that being thorough with this audit and honest
with yourself during this process is the key to making a change in your life.
I use the analogy, "Garbage in, garbage out," all the time when
I'm talking to accounting clients and this is the same thing.
So the best information you can put down in this audit is going to give you the
best results for fixing your calendar.
If you try to, kind of fluff off some things or how much time you're spending
on things because you realize it right away doing the audit and you don't put
it down on paper to account for it later, it's not going to serve you long term.
So be honest with yourself.
Nobody else has to see this as you're doing it, so just be honest with yourself.
So to do the audit, you're going to have to track and write down everything
you do so that you can get that true account of how you're spending your time.
From the moment you wake up until the moment you go to bed, you're
going to have to write it all down, at least for one week, if not two.
And while this will be tedious, a bit inconvenient, the changes it can make for
your time overwhelm will be well worth it.
When you get in the car to take the kids to school, write down
what time that started and then what time that task was complete.
You're going to have to do this for all your tasks.
Whether it's work, the kids, any of those things.
And at the end of the week, you will have a minute by minute breakdown
of how you spent each day that week.
And then you want to begin categorizing all the tasks you did.
You can even kind of color code your audit as you go along when I get to the
color code part later in this podcast.
Maybe you want to apply that to your audit.
It could kind of help simplify it.
But I'm also not trying to overcomplicate everything on the front end right
now and give you overwhelm in getting the process started either.
So you're going to begin by categorizing the tasks you did.
Family: what were the family things you had to do?
That would involve taking the kids to school, cooking dinner.
You gotta feed them, right?
Things like that.
And then have family things that you wanted to do that you did.
They didn't have to happen, but they were wants.
And this could be like going, maybe y'all went to the movies on Sunday afternoon.
And then you do the same with the work category.
So you break out the work things that you had to do.
Were there scheduled meetings?
Was there a report due?
Anything like that.
Things that had to get done on your work schedule.
And then work things that you wanted to do that you got done.
So maybe you were able to go ahead and outline a new idea.
Maybe you took a course on a new skill you're trying to learn.
Things like that.
So break them out as well.
And then do the same with what you did for yourself personally,
often called self care.
And what were the personal things you had to do that you did?
Did you have a doctor's appointment?
And then also list out or look back at the personal things
that you did that were wants.
Yoga class, maybe you had a girls' night, something like that.
And also, if there were things you did that you needed or wanted to do that week
that didn't get done, make a category for that as well and list them all out
because it's important to note what you didn't get to but had intended to.
They may find room on your new calendar.
And so once you have your categories, then start to break
down the time spent on each one.
We spend a lot of time doing things that we don't allocate enough time
for when we're making our commitments.
And so in our heads, we think we've got it all, but we've
actually overscheduled ourselves.
And that's where the overwhelm begins.
So, easy example: I do a one hour yoga class every Tuesday.
It's kind of self torture, I guess.
It's a hot power yoga.
It's brutal, but it really changes my mindset for the week, and I
love it, especially when it's over.
So every Tuesday, I do this one hour yoga class.
Now, I could fool myself and tell myself and put on my calendar, you know, only
allocate that one hour for the yoga class.
But in reality, I need to allocate two hours because it's a 15
minute drive down to the studio.
I have to park and then walk to the studio.
I have to check in.
I have to set up my mat, all of those things.
Then after class, I have to clean up my mat, put my things
away, walk to my car, drive home.
So if I have only allocated one hour for that class, I'm setting myself up
for failure from a time perspective.
Being completely honest with all the time a task takes is crucial to
creating enough time in your day for the tasks you are trying to get done.
And once you have the breakdown of how you have been spending your time, now is the
time to create a new list of priorities broken down into those categories.
When making these priorities, it is very important to note the tasks you
have been doing out of obligation, people pleasing, maybe you're
bad at saying no, all the things.
I know I am.
That is probably the biggest killer of my schedule is allowing these
things to somehow get on there.
So be sure and note any tasks you have been doing that fall into that category
that they're you're just doing them out of obligation and to make others happy.
I have to constantly check myself for things like that that
I allow to get on my calendar.
They're not aligned with my season of life, my goals, what fills my
cup, and they're usually the things that cause the most overwhelm.
You've got to recognize what they are.
And these tasks are going to be the last things that make
it into your new calendar.
The
"obligation-y," people pleasing things.
And most likely you're not going to find space for them anymore.
So these priorities are going to tell you what goes on your calendar
and what's getting off the calendar.
When making that priority list, we're going back to the categories.
We're doing a family category, a work category, that self
care, personal category.
And if you're also trying to embark on some kind of new venture for yourself
and you have some big new goals that you want to achieve, be sure and make
a category for those things as well.
Because if they're important to you, make time for them on your
calendar and start going after them.
So let's start with the family category.
So list out the things you have to do, such as make breakfast, pack lunchboxes,
get the kids to school, pick up the kids from school, cook dinner, get the kids
to practice, and yada, yada, yada, yada.
So many of these items will have their time on your calendar dictated
for you, such as school drop off.
Make a list of things your family wants to do, like the movies,
the beach day, things like that.
When we plan ahead for fun activities, they are more likely
to find space on the calendar.
And once you have the list made, what tasks can you streamline?
You know, maybe they're slightly streamlined, or maybe there's a
lot of opportunity to streamline.
So could you form a carpool with neighbors or friends for school drop off
or practices and those kind of things?
Are your kids old enough to start learning to cook some
basic meals and help with dinner?
Would meal prepping for an hour on Sunday afternoon completely
change your weeknights?
So you can save hours on tasks just by planning ahead and streamlining them.
Go through a similar process for the work category.
So the work category will look very different if you are employed
outside of the home and your work schedule is dictated for you rather
than someone that is self employed.
But sometimes it's actually more difficult for someone that is self employed because
their flexibility ends up making them overcommit, especially if they're the
type that can't say no, or they aren't disciplined enough to set work hours.
So either way, those work hours have to get put on the calendar, whether
someone's giving you that schedule or you're making it for yourself.
And self care is a category that so many women put on the back burner,
but like my little airplane oxygen mask example, that's not a good idea.
So we're expecting ourselves to be able to show up well for our family and our
work, and we have to take care of us.
And that means making self care a priority.
Yes, it's a priority, not always a want.
So, and I don't really mean like a once in a while spa day, although they are nice.
Especially with some girlfriends.
But I mean, making sure you get enough sleep.
I mean, getting exercise time on the calendar.
I mean, planning for healthy meals, which ties back to the planning meals
for your family and things like that.
And if you are one of those that are at a place in your life where you're trying to
go after some new goals and things like that, you need to make a priority list of
the tasks you need to do to achieve them.
Breaking goals down into tasks is the best way to get them done.
And then you can find space on the calendar for all of the tasks.
And before you know it, you're going to have that goal checked off.
Now that you have your categories and priorities and things that have to get
done, things you want to get done, it's time to make your calendar for the week.
Time blocking and color coding, here we come.
And a quick side note, you may be saying to yourself, I just like to
use the Google Calendar on my phone.
For this exercise, I highly recommend doing it on paper.
Then you can put it into your Google Calendar and set up the
recurring items going forward.
But for the initial laying out of your week, do it on paper.
It could take several versions and I'll actually link a free download in the
show notes where you can get a week at a glance printable and just print it
off and print multiple copies and get to work planning out that ideal week.
Decide the colors you want to use for your categories.
I use blue for family, I use bright blue for must do, light blue for want
to do, I use a version of yellow for work, so orange is the must do's,
a true yellow is the want to do's.
For personal and self care, I use pink, hot pink, pale pink.
And for growth and goals, I use green, kelly green, and lime.
So it's very easy to look at the calendar and know which things,
go to what category, where I'm spending my time in the categories.
So begin with the family category and time block those tasks in color.
Be realistic about the time needed.
Remember my yoga class.
Apply that thought process to everything that's getting put on the calendar.
Then do the work category and then do the self care category.
Put it all on the calendar and you may have some overlap.
Overlap is telling you where you need to streamline, delegate, re-evaluate,
but it needs to be analyzed on how to adjust things to get it on the calendar.
And depending on how you are or are not able to rearrange some things,
it may show you that there are some things that you need to let go.
At least for now, if you can.
So maybe you love a particular yoga class, like I do.
But, the time isn't working for you.
And you're going to have to, for now, let that one go, and find one at a different
time that is more aligned with how your calendar is working for you right now.
And yes, rearranging a workout class is a pretty simple switch and basic example.
There are much harder things to switch around, and this can be where
arranging things like the carpools and delegating tasks can be really handy.
Maybe you have a work meeting every Wednesday morning at 8 a.m.
and you're always late because you can't drop the kids off at school before 7:45.
This is where us mamas, we got to come together and support each other.
So maybe, the neighbor can take the kids on Wednesday and then
you take her kids on Friday.
As the saying goes, it never hurts to ask, right?
So go ahead and start asking some people for help and find
ways that you can help them back.
And after you've done all this, what items didn't find time to get on your calendar?
So it's most likely time to let those things go, if you can.
And visually seeing that you aren't going to be able to get things done
makes it much easier to say no to those things that we were maybe saying yes to
out of obligation.
And it's much easier to tell someone, "Honestly, I just don't have the bandwidth
to add that to my plate right now."
And being directly honest like that is much better received
because people always know when you're trying to make up excuses.
So figure out what that ideal week looks like on paper.
Rearrange all those little color coded boxes until you put the puzzle, the
little Jenga pieces together and throw out the ones that are not going to work.
And put it into your Google Calendar, if that's your calendar
of choice, and live it for a week.
And then after that week, just pause, reflect back.
What worked?
What didn't?
What still needs some tweaks?
Were there items that didn't have enough time allocated?
Were there maybe some items that had too much time allocated?
How can you reallocate to get those things aligned correctly with the time available?
And after a few weeks, you will get this calendar working for you.
It will become just autopilot, so to speak, and your days
will run much smoother.
And if you've plugged it into Google Calendar, it's pretty easy to share.
Also, if you use things like Calendly for allowing clients to schedule meetings
and everything, when you link that to your Google Calendar and you have put in
reoccurring items of times that are family time and things like that, you never
have to worry about someone booking an appointment with you when you've already
carved out time for something else.
So I hope these tips help you with your time management.
They have really helped me along the way, even though I do have to kind
of sometimes stop, reflect when I feel like my calendar has gotten off
kilter and reevaluate it, reassess.
Go back to that color coded drawing board and map it back out.
And what's funny is when I go back and do these, you know, re evaluates or reflects
or whatever, it's usually the things that I had told myself I was going to say no
to that I have allowed to creep back in.
And it's usually the things that maybe I've allowed...
I've let a boundary with a client kind of fall down and I'm spending
too much time or things like that.
But generally the things I find when I look back on getting my calendar
back on track over how I spent my time the prior week, It's the things
that I was complaining about that were stressing me out that are actually
the ones disrupting my calendar.
So when you really focus on your priorities on your calendar and then
you can notice when things creep in that are not aligned, it's an easy
way to immediately nip them in the bud and get things back on track.
So until next time, bye!