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Dr. Jeff Springer is a mens minister at Wildwood UMC in Magnolia, TX and founded two organizations: Suit Up Ministries and Spring Strategies. For 34 years, Jeff devoted his life to education as a coach, teacher, and principal. He has made it his aim in ministry to equip and encourage Dads in the vital role they play in the life of their kids.
Show Notes
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WELCOME
You Can Mentor is a podcast about the power of building relationships. Every episode will help you overcome common mentoring obstacles and give you the confidence you need to invest in the lives of others.
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SHOW NOTES
Suit Up Ministries
Email: jeff@suitupministries.org
Website: Suitupministries.org
Twitter: @suitupministry
Instagram: @suitupministries
Facebook: Suit Up Ministries
Facebook group: DADs Love Matters
Website: Suitupministries.org
Twitter: @suitupministry
Instagram: @suitupministries
Facebook: Suit Up Ministries
Facebook group: DADs Love Matters
Spring Strategies, LLC
Creators and Guests
What is You Can Mentor: A Christian Youth Mentoring Podcast?
You Can Mentor is a network that equips and encourages mentors and mentoring leaders through resources and relationships to love God, love others, and make disciples in their own community. We want to see Christian mentors thrive.
We want to hear from you! Send any mentoring questions to hello@youcanmentor.com, and we'll answer them on our podcast. We want to help you become the best possible mentor you can be. Also, if you are a mentoring organization, church, or non-profit, connect with us to join our mentoring network or to be spotlighted on our show.
Please find out more at www.youcanmentor.com or find us on social media. You will find more resources on our website to help equip and encourage mentors. We have downloadable resources, cohort opportunities, and an opportunity to build relationships with other Christian mentoring leaders.
You can mentor is a podcast about the power of building relationships with kids from hard places in the name of Jesus. Every episode will help you overcome common mentoring obstacles and give you the confidence you need to invest in the lives of others. You can mentor.
Speaker 2:Welcome back to the You Can Mentor podcast. My name is Steven, and I'm here today with a very special guest, a very special guest, doctor Jeff Springer. How the heck are you, Jeff?
Speaker 3:Man, I just Steve, I'm so excited to be here. It's it's you know, as as we said every day at d magnolia high school, it is a great day to be alive.
Speaker 2:Amen. So you might've just picked up something from what Jeff just said. Yes. He is my high school principal. So I have arrived in life to the point that I could call up my high school principal and he would want to be on my podcast.
Speaker 2:I think that's amazing. I mean, bucket list done. So thank you, Jeff, for making time to jump on the podcast today. And honestly, I mean, I feel like this is the best time for me to confess some stuff to you, particularly from my freshman year. I remember a time that, my brother my brother was a senior when I was a freshman and him and his buddies challenged me to trip on a banana peel in the cafeteria, in the middle of the cafeteria.
Speaker 2:So you remember that big m that was in in the middle, they put a banana peel down and told me to go trip on it. Well, I tripped on it and it really hurt myself. And the first person to come to my aid was none other than Jeff Springer, the principal of Magnolia High School. And I felt so much shame because this joke was meant to be for the other students, but then all of a sudden, you insert yourself with being compassionate and gracious, offering to take me to the nurse to check out, to get me ice. And I I feel like I just ran away.
Speaker 2:So thank you so much for loving me in that moment, and I'm sorry it was all a sham. It wasn't real.
Speaker 3:But she gave me an opportunity to demonstrate to other students that a principal could actually have possess, empathy and compassion for, you know, for all students.
Speaker 2:It was huge. It was huge. I don't think our school was ever the same after that moment. But in all honesty, Jeff, just, I mean, from my experience in high school, I always thought you were a good man. I thought you were a godly man, even if I didn't even know what that was not growing up in the church.
Speaker 2:I just had that image of you. So the fact that you loved me well even in that moment when I had practically lied to you about a situation, I just I that that made me question even more what who you were. Like, you were a myth to me even just in always telling us it was a great day to be alive. Like, I think you just had this energy, this joy, this peace.
Speaker 3:When I would speak with, smaller groups like Fellowship Christian Athletes, I would tell them that really when they heard me say it's a great day to be alive, I was saying, you know, Psalm 11824, this is the day the Lord hath made. So let us rejoice and be glad in it. Obviously, I couldn't say that in a public high school over the PA system, but I said next time you hear me say that to those particular students, you know what I what I really mean. So I've said that for a long time, 34 years in education. I have kids that come and see me.
Speaker 3:You know, some kids know me as coach, and some know me as mister Springer. And, I didn't stay in it long enough to be doctor. I I got my doctorate after I got out. Go figure. And, but anyway, I'm Springer.
Speaker 3:I'm Springer to most people. Just Springer.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And that I mean, that's even made it into your latest project. Would love to just share where you're at now. Doctor Springer. Wow.
Speaker 2:Doctor. He didn't get to walk because of COVID 19, but he is still a doctor. He serves as the men's minister at UMC in Magnolia, Texas, and he started 2 amazing organizations, one titled Suit Up Ministries, that equips and encourages dads in the vital role they play in the life of their kids, And then another consulting organization called Spring Strategies, which is a strategic consulting company that helps small businesses and educational leaders create systems in their organizations that help them lead with confidence. And so if you lead a nonprofit or an organization, a small business, highly encourage you if you're inspired by this conversation to reach out to Jeff and see, how he can partner with you guys. And so I love having Jeff on the podcast, but as I said, he was a myth and a legend to me in high school.
Speaker 2:So I just like to ask Jeff. Jeff, who is Jeff Springer? Can you paint a picture for our listeners?
Speaker 3:Wow. Again, that's a that's, you know, I I love to ask that question of other people, but I you know, that's a it's always a hard one to, you know, to answer. But, you know, bottom line is I'm a coach. You know, I'm a once a coach, always a coach. I'm I love to coach people, develop people.
Speaker 3:I love to figure out who they are, what makes them tick, how can they be better, how how can we maximize, you know, this this person's, abilities and talents, and and help them realize, you know, really how valuable they are, and and how complete, and, and loved. And, you know, I'm working on that discipleship thing with Christ, you know. I I mean, I wanna I want to be, you know, the you know, I wanna strive to be a disciple of Christ. And, you know, hopefully, I do a lot of that or a lot of that just comes out in my coaching and my 1 on 1, developing of of people. So, you know, I'm a dad.
Speaker 3:I love being a dad. I I've I've been able to possess, I think, the 2 best titles ever. And, that's coach and dad. And and they're really the same thing. I think that every, you know, every kid's first coach should be their dad, you know.
Speaker 3:So there's a lot of parallels with those those 2. And, so my heart, you know, I God laid on my heart back in 2008. I've been in education for a long time. I saw the ill effects of absentee fathers, you know, in my schools. And a lot of, you know, when you peel away a lot of, facades of kids when you have them in your office and you talk about what's going on in their life, and because they're, you know, a habitual discipline problem, you find out that very few of these got these boys and girls that act out in school or have problems related, to their behavior.
Speaker 3:Oftentimes, it's directly related to no male role figure, that's positive in their life.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Yeah. And I'm sure working in education for over 30 years, you've probably seen even just the trajectory and a shift within families just based off of watching watching how kids are acting and and what's going on in the school and who you're having conversations with. So I don't know if you've seen a shift over those 30 years. What did it look like back in was it 1990 versus
Speaker 3:Yeah. Yeah. My first year in teaching was the fall of, let's see, 82. And, yeah, there was divorce. I mean, I came from a divorce divorced family, but it was less, you know, prominent.
Speaker 3:It wasn't it was the it kind of the exception to the rule, and now that's now being married is kind of the exception to the rule. It's flipped, you know? So but I was, you know, through the years, I can remember late eighties, early nineties, when I was at a I was a teacher and a coach at at 1 high school in the Cy Fair District. I, many, many times, stood in as a as this, father figure for father daughter dances, walking, you know, senior football players on senior night out, walked twice, walked homecoming queen nominees across the field. I mean, I just can't even comprehend.
Speaker 3:These are, you know, amazing kids, and their dad is nowhere. You know? And in most cases, their dad's alive. They're just not present. So yeah.
Speaker 3:But I I I you know, the the percentages, if you look at at the statistics, you know, we're we're we're growing up in a fatherless America, and, there is so many, you can you can if you look at the statistics, you can you know, it takes you right back to, you know, drug abuse, juveniles in prison, you know, dropouts, rape, you know, poverty. It, you know, it all you can circle, you know, you were asked the question, where are the dads?
Speaker 2:Yeah, man. Gosh. I'd I mean, I love the picture you just shared is, like, these good kids, where's their dad? And just being a coach, being a father figure in their life, how you feel the absence while at the same time that there's there's an opportunity
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:That's presented to men in the church Mhmm. To to stand up. Like, you you kinda said it to step forward and and be God's men, and so I'd love to even continue the conversation about being a mentor, being a father figure. Being those things are very similar to being a dad. I realize there's a different level of responsibility, but there are a lot of overlapping heart motivations, and desires in that calling to be a father figure that relate to the calling of a dad.
Speaker 2:And so I'd I'd love for you to unpack what are the differences you see between someone being a mentor and someone being a dad, and should those different differences or similarities influence how we mentor?
Speaker 3:Yeah. Well, first of all, I think that, I mean, it's so there's such an overlap. We, SUDEP Ministries, one of our one of the one of the opportunities or ministries we offer, we call it we call it Dad University, and they're either half day or full day, men's conferences where we invite dads of speakers of, you know, from blended family to divorced dads to raising daughters, raising sons, you know, been there, done that dads, dads that need reconciliation, you know, future dads, new dads, you name it. Every life stage, the and the goal is that they leave that day, hearing at least one speaker, that relates to where they are in their life. And, you know, we emphasize that you don't have to be the biological dad to be a dad, or to be a dad figure.
Speaker 3:Because, you know, there's a lot of men out there that are, you know, that will remain childless as far as, you know, the biological children, but they still have there still is plenty of opportunity to influence in a positive way. And obviously, educators, men in education, have a great, platform there. It's not maybe as easy for men that are, you know, just you know, are, you know, in the the the real world, so to speak, you know, the corporate worlds, you know, Unless there's a partnership between that corporation and Big Brothers, or or church organizations, etcetera, the focus is on that. But, you know, being a father figure is, you you know, you what we say is as a mentor or or a father figure, you can't ever take the place of the biological father. However, you can serve as a reminder that we have a Heavenly Father.
Speaker 3:You know, you can you can I I just think that that's so essential to to remember? You know, there's some moments as a mentor that you, like, as you mentioned, that you may not, you know, place yourself in or have that opportunity, but really depends on the scenario, and the willingness of this of the situation, you know, that it presents. You you know, a lot of times you're gonna to me, the difference maybe between a mentor and a and a dad that's involved is a dad has more opportunity for those, developmental moments. It's gonna be there when, maybe, when the child takes his first step, or says his first words, or, you know, rides his learns how to ride a bike, or, you know but, you know, I it's funny. I didn't realize how much I missed as a young dad until I became a grandpa, because I could see all the things that my daughter does as a mom.
Speaker 3:And because because my son-in-law goes to work, you know, there are there are hours during the day and thing and then maybe even in the evenings that even as the biological dead, we we miss if we're not careful. So, so, yeah, there's a there's a lot of similarities, and I think it's I think if a man is called to be the mentor, I think it is a calling, you know, you know, to make a difference in other youth's lives. I think it's, you know, I think that's amazing. It can can, you know, I've had real I have lifelong relationships with some of my former students to this day that and I call all my kids, you know, my school daughter, my school son, and I think that's you know, of course, again, I had a a vast field of opportunity on a daily basis.
Speaker 2:Something you said was that fathers a difference between fathers and mentors is that they have more opportunities, and I I think something that you hear consistently that discourages men or when we miss opportunities, and that can just shut you down. When you when there was an opportunity and you didn't rise to the occasion or you didn't step up, there's just shame and guilt, and that just piles on, and that that clearly happens to fathers, but it also happens to mentors. I've seen mentors who miss a game that they said they were gonna go to and they forgot about it, and you could just see them shut down and, so I I wonder if you could speak to that, of just yeah. What is it about men that when we miss an opportunity, it just it it wrecks us?
Speaker 3:You know, we talk we talk about it at that university or within SUDEP Ministries, why men walk away. And I think sometimes they walk away because what you just said, they feel like maybe they've gone too far, that there's no return. And so that's why we I mentioned reconciliation, you know, dads that need reconciliation. It's never too late to be the dad. Never.
Speaker 3:And it's never too late to be the mentor. Whatever it is that, you know, it can be bridged. You know, you just had to take that first first step. You have to have make and I think what happens is men feel like they just that maybe kids are better without what they talk themselves, you know, it's at the at first, it's hurt it hurts, but then the longer it goes, they you know, there's probably there's there's just self doubt and self, you know, doubt and self lack of self worth. And the kid you know, maybe they say the kid's better without me.
Speaker 3:You know, that's never the case. It is well, I mean, there's rare cases, I'm sure. But in most cases, if it's it those things can be healed, and they can be mended.
Speaker 2:And I bet the people who are the ones that their kids are better off without would never recognize that.
Speaker 3:Right. Yeah. It's just hard. And so they've it's it maybe it's a it's a feeling of, un, unworthiness. And then sometimes we just we just, you know, as men, we just simply don't like confrontation sometimes.
Speaker 3:So it's hard to come back and turn the page. You know, it's hard to humble humble ourselves and say, you know, and say that we, you know, we're you know, you know, and ask for forgiveness, that we screwed up, you know. And we don't get it right. We one of the first things we tell our guys that are in the audience at Grad University is we're all these every one of these men that are gonna be speaking today, that we we're still trying to figure it out too. You know, dads never graduate.
Speaker 3:Well, you know, you you it's a university that you never graduate from. You know, you're always a dad. Once a dad, always a dad. And I I tell we tell our kids I mean, we tell our men the best thing they can do for kids is love the wife, the mom. But sometimes divorce happens, but you don't ever divorce your kid.
Speaker 3:You're you're always biologically connected to that kid, regardless of what your marital status is. It makes it harder for men because of distance, and you have to be more creative. And and I mean, I've dealt with men that are in prison, and they, you know, I've done prison ministry, and and after I've spoken to a group, they've put, you know, one several of them pulled me aside and say, how can I be the dad inside these walls? And even inside even inside the wall, I used to be the dad. You know, letter writing and and, you know, and and, you know, verbalizing and being, you know, creating some kind of consistency even from a distance.
Speaker 2:Obviously, you know, my podcast is called You Can Mentor. It's because we we believe you can mentor. Whoever's listening, all 8 of you out there, and and I think, obviously, your ministry, SUDA ministries, is you can dad. You can dad, like and maybe you need to start your own podcast, Jeff, but I I'd love to hear what what you've kind of found to be motivating for dads to get back in the game, who have maybe fallen by the wayside and, maybe they did go through a divorce and decided that was you know, maybe I'm not good good enough, or I don't have what it takes, or it'd be more harmful than good, or it'd be more difficult. My I'm busy.
Speaker 2:I got a schedule, and I'm trying to move on. I I wonder if those same motivations that you give to dads would be encouragements to our mentors as well who who feel that sense of maybe I'm not cut out for this.
Speaker 3:Well, we, you know, we use, we take the word dad as an acronym. It stands for daily active devotion. And, you know, I've always said that, you know, the word, you know, father is is great. Obviously, our, you know, father in heaven is we all have that father. But sometimes there's a lot of there's fathering going on, but there's not a lot of dads.
Speaker 3:You know, there's biological fathering, but then not daily active devotion, you know, the difference between 2. And so, I I really would like to it's really not fatherlessness, it's really dadlessness. I mean, because there's a lot of fathering going on and part of that and that's part of the problem, you know. But then men are not being the dad. So it means, you know, sticking around.
Speaker 3:So I just say stick to it, You know, what do you do? We break it down. You know, what does it mean to be daily? What does it mean to be active? You know, being a dad doesn't mean just in the room or in the under the same roof.
Speaker 3:It means being, you know, active. So how do you do how do you demonstrate being an active dad, you know, and then devoted, you know, what what kinds of things do you do that illustrate your devotion to your children? You know, so daily active, you know, devotion. You know, one of your questions, you know, I meant you you mentioned, that you sent me was about, you know, what do kids need? You know, what and I need consistency.
Speaker 3:You need you know, they need someone who cares about their they need consistency. Someone who cares about their journey, creates a future for them, prophesies a future, can see a future for their projects a future for their kids, whether you're a father figure or whether you're the dad. So, you know, consistency, cares about the journey and creates a future. So those would be kind of those kind of things. And the other thing is is we here's what we tell our dads when they the goal, that our little tagline for dad university when they spend a day with us is that we want 1 man, one change, one generation.
Speaker 3:We're not asking you to change your whole life. We're we're looking if 2 inner men come, we're saying that the whole day was worthwhile if one man just leaves this conference to make and makes one change that changes one generation. But we you know, so so that kinda so that's what I would tell a mentor or a dad. You don't have to do it all. You just do one thing.
Speaker 3:What is that one thing that you can change to be a better mentor or to be a better dad that would potentially affect a generation?
Speaker 2:That is an awesome challenge. Both both of those, the daily active devotion in 1 man, 1 change, 1 generation. I love that, Jeff. And and I hope, yeah, every mentor that listens to this who is feeling overwhelmed, discouraged in that place of I don't know if I have what it takes, what is one thing you could change? Yeah.
Speaker 2:Just one thing. I would say as a man, when I feel discouraged, I need to cling on to, like, what's one simple thing that I can I can see progress and
Speaker 3:Well, the other the other thing is is I think that sometimes as we don't always see the fruit of our labor, so we're but we're planting seeds? As a so as a mentor, maybe you get frustrated because you don't see immediate results with a kid's behavior, attitude, or relationship. And, you know, kids are not gonna just love you just because you walk in the room. It takes time. One of the very first thing I wanted to do when I came to Magnolia High School, my goal was to become be to become old fast, but you can't.
Speaker 3:There's no replacement for time. You just get to put the time in. You know, so if you ask the question, what one of the questions was, you know, about, you know, seeing, experiencing, you know, life changes and so forth with men and their relationships and so forth. And most of it, I have to say, unfortunately, we don't see the fruit, but we do but we hear, you know, gratitude for providing this type of ministry and mostly local because it's not always we know there's not a lot of people talking about dadhood, you know. There's there's not a lot of you know, student ministry exists for 2 reasons 2 very simple reasons to to celebrate the dads that are already in the game, number 1, because nobody else is.
Speaker 3:Nobody tells the the world doesn't, you know, we're not, you know, essential. And, deemed for the most part, the buffoon on TV and movies. So number 1, we're we celebrate dads. Number 2, we exhort dads, to get off the bench and get in the game. The ones that aren't, to to come alongside their their wife, their spouse, to be that other parent, you know.
Speaker 3:Those those two things. So, you know, so it's funny we do more probably of the first because we typically have dads typically dads that come to dad university or dads that are in the game, but they're not may not be all the way in. You know, they're but they're or they're in and there's they're, they want to be the the champion dad. You know, they wanna continue to be you know, they wanna it's like my dad was 80 years old when he came to he came to one of my dad universities because that's what kind of dad he was. He you know, just like when I was, you know, all my games.
Speaker 3:So I'm 8 he's 80, I'm 60, and he's still coming to my stuff. And and sitting in the back row, and you would think, what would he have to learn at age 80 about being a dad? You know, but even at, you know, so, even dads that say, well, I've been there, done that, or I hope you get a lot of young dads. I always say to them, look, this is an opportunity for you to continue to learn yourself, even if you're a grandpa or empty nest dad. It's also an opportunity for you to bring, your son-in-law, your son, your neighbor's son, your neighbor.
Speaker 3:It's a fellowship opportunity to learn right beside each other how to be a better dad. So the bottom line is if we don't, Steven, if we don't, then, I mean, wouldn't it be great if I mean, I love the fact that you have this mentoring program, but wouldn't it be great if the dad was the mentor? And and, you know, and I used to talk I used to relate this to youth ministry. Thank God we have strong youth ministry. And a lot of time for a lot of youth, if it wasn't for youth men, it wouldn't have made it because they didn't have it at home.
Speaker 3:But what if youth ministry and mentorship was reinforcement of what was happening at home instead of replacement?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Well and even in my experience doing youth ministry, I've had so many dads who are investing in their kids asking me to mentor their kids because they want the message to be reinforced Yeah. Somewhere else.
Speaker 3:Exactly.
Speaker 2:And and so in a in a perfect environment, both of those are happening Yeah. Not not just one of them.
Speaker 3:It it just amplifies it.
Speaker 2:I I love what you said just about the community aspect of dadhood that dads need dads. I mean, you you get that. I got that when I was in college. I just knew that I needed other men in my life to invest in me and show me how to be a man and mentoring is all about that of inviting people into a community of learning. And I like what you said of of celebration and exhortation that that there there is this community that you're invited into that encompasses both of those things, that we celebrate you and we exhort you and we challenge you.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. And, it's it's Having a kid now when Ben was born, something I recognize and have been talking to my wife Katie about is she she told me that when the baby screams, something goes on within her body that there's a feedback loop that creates breast milk
Speaker 3:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And might causes her body to just activate. Mhmm. When he screams, nothing happens in my body but disruption, lack of sleep. Like, there's there's nothing going on that's for his benefit when he screams other than if I'm in a right mind, prayerful spirit, feeling compassion for my son. What I what I take away from that is is really women inherently have this design that's very natural to provide for and nurture children and I think men have to be taught how to be in their role, and they need to be invited into that community of men which is something we always talk about is like a rite of passage as a man is is coming under the leadership of other men who are showing you what manhood is and and I just think that that's huge for dads and mentors.
Speaker 3:Yep. You know, it's easier, Steven, if you've had a dad that showed you that. But there's a lot of dads that are in the breaking the cycle business. You know, they never had it. It was never it was there was yeah.
Speaker 3:There's no instruction book, and you don't really know until you really know, even if you had it modeled. But it helps if you had a dad that modeled it for you. You know, I I'll never forget this when I'll never I it was like yesterday. My daughter will be 32 this month. And, but it seems like it was just yesterday.
Speaker 3:We brought her home for the very first time, and I remember laying my head on the pillow realizing that my my baby girl is not a puppy. I mean, for this is a lifetime this is a lifetime commitment. This is not a puppy. You know, this is real. And so but I wonder how I would have been if I mean, I have Amazie's wife and mom, but I wonder how I would have been if I was that same if I was the same guy without a dad that didn't model that, you know, being a dad for me.
Speaker 3:So where my empathy comes in is going through a parent you know, my parents' divorce. They didn't divorce me, but they divorced each other. So I think that's where I have that empathy natural empathy for broken homes and kids that, you know, that need their dads or away from their both parents and so forth. But but I did have a dad that remained in my life. And so so, yeah, that community is really important.
Speaker 3:I so admire a guy, a man that says he, you know, he's it's a buck stops, you know, here. I'm not gonna we're not gonna continue that legacy anymore. We're gonna create a new legacy. Man, that is but that also takes other men as well to so and let's face it. Men don't they don't normally stand around the water cooler at work and talk about what it means to be a dad.
Speaker 3:Not really. I mean, I think it's becoming more I am, somewhat, you know, excited and and and I see hope hopeful. I guess that's the word. Because I do see more young dads out with their kid. Of course, not right now in the pandemic, but prior to that, you know, out in stores and so forth, I would see dads buy more times than before by themselves.
Speaker 3:So maybe there's some balance there, you know. It's become more chic, more okay for dads to be at the dad, and not just the provider, you know, the maybe the nurturer as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Absolutely. I I think especially if they invest in some long white socks and, some Sperry shoes and a visor. I feel like that I mean, you can dad with that.
Speaker 3:So Absolutely.
Speaker 2:I mean, that's totally in right now
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Or it's it's back. I don't know if that was in already. I think it was. But yeah. Absolutely, Jeff.
Speaker 2:And it sounds like the dads that are killing it, that are doing a great job are the ones that, I guess, are are more willing to talk about it, to talk about dadhood and are are comfortable in that identity. And I I wonder for, Suit Up Ministries, if you're looking at these dads who are wanting to grow and you're like, hey, who would you refer
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:To to jump in?
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And and your referrals aren't coming from, like, the the top 10 dads of Magnolia, Texas. Your referrals are coming from the guys who are trying to figure it out.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So I I wonder if you have any thoughts on that.
Speaker 3:One of one of our goals in 2020 is to we wanna pour into what we call our, our dad champions. So then they can turn around and pour into the guys they know in their networks via neighborhood or, Zoom or what have you. You know? Because this obviously, this pandemic has kinda changed like we're doing this right now. So the goal is is we're developing what we call these, suit up dad huddles that are either geographically, physically geographic, neighborhood dad groups, like a support group of dads, that these champions invite.
Speaker 3:We don't tell the champions who to invite, when to invite, how often they meet, you know, where they meet. But we do supply or support them with the curriculum. And so and it's all geared towards being, you know, being the dad. And so much some of it is direct curriculum about being a dad, and some of it but most of it is just is really just basic biblical application that there are principles for regardless of what gender or what age you are, that you're gonna be a better person in general, which means you're gonna be a better dad for your kids. The main thing is just getting those guys together, you know, whether it's Zoom or face to face in a in a room to to to maybe even commiserate a little bit about how hard it is to be a dad, you know, and to learn from the mistakes maybe of an older dad sitting next to a brand new dad, and that kind of thing.
Speaker 3:So yeah. So that goal the goal that we want to launch in the fall is some sort of dad university online that includes Zoom groups and face to face groups led by a group of of these champions that we pour into, to, you know, kinda enlarge this territory.
Speaker 2:I love it, and I think we should be having more conversations, and I I hope SUDEP ministries, yeah, blows up just and creates more conversations for dads who need to be invited into that community. And just from my experience, inviting people into mentoring, it creates something within men when you when you say, hey, I think you could be a great mentor. I think you could be a great dad. I think you are a great dad. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And I I think calling those things out in people causes them to rise up to what God has called them to do, to step forward and to to influence their family and their community in in crazy ways. And so I I just think that yeah. I'm all for the huddles. And I I feel like for for us as a mentoring organizations, I've usually seen the huddle time as this is a time for me to train, to give you tips and tricks, and I think even just recognizing the power of the community aspect of just feeling known, seen, and that being the thing that challenges you, that being the thing that that puts fire in your bones to be a better dad and, to do the stuff.
Speaker 3:If you're a dad out there, sometimes you think you're alone, you know, or you're the only dad that's made that mistake Or you're, you know, you're the worst dad in the neighborhood, you know. And then you then you find out in a huddle situation that, you know, there's other men that are, you know, feeling the same way. So it's kinda like those same points with, hey, you know, what are what are kids need from their their mentors and their coaches. Well, you know, men need the same thing. We're just we're big kids in older bodies.
Speaker 3:We still need consistency. We need somebody who cares about our journey, and and and we need, like you said, basically, sometimes speak into their their dadhood, you know, and acknowledge what some of something positive that you've seen. I just got off the phone with or did a Zoom with a with one of my men at at church, and he's a big burly guy, man. He works in the oil field. He's a man's man, but he's got 3 little girls and a boy.
Speaker 3:And the oldest is 9, the youngest is 3, and the boy's the youngest. And the mother's a saint. He he you know, just to can you can you imagine just getting the 4 of them ready for church on Sunday morning? You know, the chaos? The chaos.
Speaker 3:And I said so I I said, John, I can't wait till we get back to church so I can see your beautiful family come in. And they're always there right at, you know, time that church starts, but thank God they're there. And I said, I miss seeing that, but, you know, I wanna acknowledge that what you're doing is even if you don't think it's a big deal, you know, that, you know, getting your kids in the car in one direction and all going to church, to get those kids dressed and cleaned and fed. And I I just, you know, that's amaze. So sometimes I think they I think they, you know, dads don't see some of that as, you know, as a big deal.
Speaker 3:But that's part of that speaking into, and and then they go, man, somebody else noticed that this is important. This is important. And I wanna continue to be that man, and be that dad.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So good, Jeff. Being a dad who can get 4 kids clothed to church on time, I feel like is pretty impressive dadhood right there. And I do think there's a level of comparison that happens that robs us of joy. We see other relationships, other dads, other mentors who are killing it, and we look at our own situation, and we're like, I'm I'm not measuring up to that.
Speaker 3:Right. Right.
Speaker 2:And I I wonder what you would say to the dad who's stuck there, the mentor who's stuck in a negative comparison loop, how how do they get out of that as your your last thought?
Speaker 3:Yeah. Well, it's kinda like, you know, I think that's why men that's why some of us don't go to the gym because soon as we go to the gym, you know, we get so excited about this, you know, the set that we just did. And then we look across the gym, and we see this big, you know, guy that who's been who's been doing it for years, you know. And we again, we're we're impatient. We just want it to happen today.
Speaker 3:And, being a dad doesn't it's not a one day job. It's a it's, you know, start here and have a point, aiming point, and a big picture. And so just don't get caught up in the comparison game. Just be the be the dad that you you know, for your kid, that daily active, devoted dad, where you're at today, and, and to take that first step and and be consistent.
Speaker 2:So good. Jeff Springer, everybody. We're gonna leave his information in the show notes so you can connect with him, but yes, definitely look out for the next episode with Jeff Springer. And we're gonna unpack play and how that affects our mentor relationships and should influence how we live as dads and leaders in our communities. So I wonder if you could give a teaser for, spring strategies and, and kind of the, the philosophy of what you try to impart into organizations and leaders.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Because I I wanna give people a taste, so they'll come back next week.
Speaker 3:Yeah. Well, play is we feel like that ultimately we want people engaged because if people are engaged in what they're doing, then they're, you know, the pro productivity, the creativity, the innovation, imagination is all, you know, it it just grows. So so so engagement is the goal and play is the vehicle. And so we talk about the different aspects of play. Who are your people?
Speaker 3:Who do you love? What are you acknowledging, and and what do you yearn for? And so we we we'll break that down next time and how that, play plays out in in, in the cultures that, people are are working in.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much, Jeff, for spending time talking into our dadhood. I'm encouraged. I'm 3 weeks in and I'm ready to go.
Speaker 3:Suit up, brother. Hey. Thanks, Steven. I love you. Proud of
Speaker 2:you. Wow. Loved that interview with Jeff Springer. I'm excited to have him on again on the podcast to explain that acronym he mentioned, PLAY. So be on the lookout for the next episode.
Speaker 2:And maybe even in that interview I'll get to ask him a few more questions about being my high school principal, such as, his son played basketball and he got more playing time than me. So I wanna know what's up with that. So be on the lookout for that episode and for this episode I'd encourage you and challenge you to identify one thing you can change about your mentoring relationship out of all of the principles and things that came out of that. I know he is a principal, but he shared a lot of principles in that episode so find 1, make a change, and you could change a generation. If you picked up one thing from today's episode let it be this, you can mentor.