well hello All You Beautiful
[Music]
People you know what time it
is ladies and gents Guys and Dolls and
everyone in
between gather around get you something
real nice to sip on and comfy to slip
on cuz it's time for smut Club here's
your hosts Chelsey and
[Applause]
Hannah I don't feel great about that
clap but hey everybody Welcome to smut
club I'm Hannah and I'm Chelsea and this
is the podcast where we frequently
daydrink and review our favorite romance
novels some are better than others very
correct yeah but that doesn't mean we
love the other ones any less also except
when we
do except for certain ones you know
which ones if you've listened to the
podcast we're not subtle
people a coworker was telling me that uh
them and a friend had listened to one of
our
episodes but they were like Chelsea my
friend was listening to the episode in
public and got so uncomfy they like left
the store they were in and head I'm
like could they have turned off the
podcast and kept shopping right or were
they so into the podcast they were like
I have to Know How It Ends like I which
I'm so honored right quite frankly if
I've taken the gas to drive somewhere
I'm I'm probably going to switch off the
podcast or sit in my car I know that's
what I would do i' go and sit in my car
until I got through it MH
mhm but we aren't going to get through
anything if we don't know what book
we're reviewing today you're the one who
did today's review I did we are doing
Nora's Kraken by Lee Miller which was a
request um from a former cooworker of
mine current cooworker of yours shout
out to Caitlyn um so how was Lee spelled
just l e i g h oh okay MH like I feel
like there's a couple different options
so if anyone was looking it up wanted
you know I although many other books are
also called Norris Kraken uh none that I
found cuz when I Googled it when Caitlyn
recommended it it was just the one that
I found so you know go with that go with
the only book you'll probably find in a
Google search called Norris
Kraken
so this is like a uh
contemporary
paranormal um
and we
open like straight into it so Nora is
our main character it switches back and
forth between her point of view and
Elias's point of view but we open with
Nora Elias underused name great name
yeah I like it yeah yeah when I read it
I was like why don't we use that more
it's good other Contender
silus I I would lump them in the same
category yeah yeah
so Nora sorry my cousin is pregnant and
we going back and forth about baby names
I get it I got off the I I did bath time
and was on the phone earlier this week
and by the time I got off the phone I
had
47 m missed text messages on this thread
where they were going back and forth
Just on baby names so uh a little in in
the the name head space that makes sense
and it is a big decision I was about to
say 47 text messages feels really
extreme but if you're going to do that
with anything it should be what you're
going to name your kid right and there's
five of us on the thread yeah so I feel
like that that's pretty easy to do when
you get on a roll yeah that's fair okay
but oh I was up say say so tell me more
about silus but that's not his name no
we're we're still with Nora so there is
a we haven't even made it to the other
one yet okay so there's a uh government
agency called the Paranormal citizens
relations Bureau because
monsters came out a few years ago and
like let humans at large know that they
exist and so they're integrating into
society and so the Paranormal citizens
relations Bureau that's the last time
I'm going to say the whole thing cuz
it's a lot um is like responsible for
supporting them and figuring that out
out so Nora is very much human and she
is at the bureau because she's been
recognized as a mate to a kraken shifter
so she's meeting with an agent who is
telling her
hey somebody recognized you as their
mate is that part of why Monsters made
their presence known for the opportunity
to mate does that matter why they made
their presence known I don't think that
ever really fully comes out okay um
there's a lot of like political stuff in
in there um but primarily it seemed to
be more of a um like a changing of the
times thing where with cell phones and
cameras and things like that it was
getting harder to hide and so they were
kind of like let's just get ahead of it
I respect that so nor is freaking out um
about this whole you have a mate thing
she's like who even is it I've never met
this person I don't want a mate um and
the agent is trying to explain to her
that Krakens are very very
loyal um and sometimes a little bit
Territorial and she immediately shuts
down and is like nope um because she
like is thinking about a past abusive
relationship that she was in so as soon
as she hears anything about somebody
being possessive or ter
she's like abolutely not not into it I'm
not doing it so the Kraken apparently
saw her when she was out getting coffee
a few days
ago and so the bureau followed up with
her uh like the same day to come in but
this is a few days later she kind of put
it off until a couple days later okay so
she flat out tells the the agent she is
not interested she's like thank you but
no thank you I'm out of here like I'm
done I don't want to meet him I don't
want to know anything else I'm out so on
the way out of the building she runs
into this gorgeous guy who recognizes
her it's the
Kraken
what
[Laughter]
amazing so so she's starting to panic
because she's like oh [ __ ] and um
like he was there waiting for her it
seems like he was going to meet the
agent it doesn't seem like he was like
stalking her okay but he does like she
literally runs into him and he like
grabs her arm to steady her and she's
like oh God and he immediately like
backs up and he's like I'm I'm really
sorry just really quietly like I'm
really sorry and then she like runs away
so we go to Elias's point of view and he
is our
Kraken so he's trying not to freak out
how big are
Kraken so um he's unshifted so he's in
human form that's something I should
have mentioned to be fair when you said
she ran into a gorgeous man I like
assumed he was in human form but then I
like paused for a second I was like what
is the notum form I was like I don't
pretty big from what it sounds like
later this seems like pretty large yeah
ites
heyo
so um he
is really upset that she doesn't want
anything to do with him and he calls her
Lenora which is her full name um and he
hasn't slept since he found her 3 days
ago he just wants to be near
her and it turns out the agent who was
talking to her was actually um the
director of The Bureau and it's Elias's
best friend
so um the plot thick I know
so Blair who is the agent tells Elias
you need to let her come to you right
like just back up just it's going to be
okay great wingman
advice and um he Blair is also like
listen monsters have done a lot of work
to from a PR perspective to not be
terrifying to All Humans do not [ __ ]
this up for us like you need to simmer
down don't do anything stupid get that
you're excited but do not ruin this for
all of us because you can't keep your
Kracken dick in your pants correct yeah
and so um Elias is like okay I will
ignore every Instinct I have to follow
her and make sure that she's safe um I
will I will let her come to me so we're
back to Nora she is staying busy going
to work in a where she works in a
bookstore she's doing her thing and then
she it's Tuesday which is Coffee Day
apparently she has a very regimented
schedule because Tuesday is Coffee Day
where she like goes out for a coffee so
she goes to a different shop I feel like
she she might need some
more kazaz in her life little razzled
Dazzle
something something she doesn't want any
of it so she goes to a different coffee
shop hoping to avoid Elias because
that's where he saw her the first
time um which my notes say unsuccessful
he was also trying to avoid the same
coffee shop they run into each
other I thought I thought he was you
were going to say it was unsuccessful
because he was stalking her and just
followed her to the other so he really
is trying to be respectful and be like
okay like that's her Cofe I'll go to
this one I will like give her space and
time which is part of why I like this
book because it's a very sort of
refreshing departure from the usual
faded mate thing where he was like tough
[ __ ] like I'm your mate and like
dragging her off somewhere like I love
books when they like claim them in a
bonding ceremony and don't tell them
until after she's like I just felt a
burn on my ass while we were Bing then
afterward she's like he branded me that
son of a [ __ ] and you're
like wait wait what he did what consent
matters you guys for a lot of reasons
for a lot of reasons and in this one
Elias is very conscious of that and it's
very endearing
actually so um he's the CEO of major
company and blah blah blah and and he so
he's a successful very successful Kraken
shifter yes so we learned that Blair the
director of The Bureau and Elias were we
eventually put it all together they were
pirates together and then they started a
legitimate business and they would trade
off like every 30 years since they don't
die or age so one of them would be the
public face of the company the other one
would work in the background and then
they would switch every so often so
people wouldn't get like suspicious so
they would switch every 30 I don't
remember I didn't write it down they
switch every so
often that I apologize that wasn't me
crique like critiquing your I don't know
no it was more of I'm like you think
they would need to switch more often
because if you don't age I think some
disp sooner than 30 years I'm sure they
did something like dye their hair gray
or something I don't know and none of
that was explained but um so he's
clearly also very powerful so Blair left
the company Elias took it over
completely so he's very very wealthy um
and very powerful and Nora remembers
running from her ex and having to take
just like a little bit of cash and
jewelry that she could carry before
moving across the country to Seattle
because he was also very powerful and
very wealthy and she's like yeah can't
be under anyone's thumb yeah she's like
double no not doing this um so he starts
walking with her like not following her
but he just wants to continue their
conversation and he touches her shoulder
and she flips out she's like do not
touch me do not speak to me again and we
go to his point of view and he feels so
bad like he feels so so guilty that he
cross crossed a boundary that he scared
her and so he realizes that she
is she is not going to change her mind
like she's very set in the boundaries
that that she's putting forth and so he
is going to do his absolute very best to
honor them and um so he makes a decision
he is not going to reach out to her he
is not going to speak to her even if he
sees her in public like he's going to
leave her alone uh but when he gets to
work he starts researching her online
because he just can't help it like he
just wants to know a little bit more
about her and he feels really guilty
that he's even doing that um but
eventually finds out that she used to
have a different last name and her
boyfriend was in Congress until she
suddenly disappeared like 3 years ago so
they were constantly like on page six or
in magazines and stuff together and then
all of a sudden she just like poofed
yeah so like her ex is not a man who
like just like thought he emitted big
dick energy and like was not like he
like powerful in his own head but it was
really just like physically controlling
like I'm like oh like actual power yep
okay and so now that same boyfriend is
on the Paranormal Relations Committee in
Congress and so he's
like you
know he's like I I just want to know how
to keep her safe like I don't know what
happened to her but like I just want to
know how to keep her safe so in his head
he's now like okay well if I can't love
her I'll just protect her kind of yeah
he's like I I just I'll be here if she
needs me but I'm not going to like
insert myself into her life um if she
doesn't want to talk to me she doesn't
have to I'm a big Elias fan right now
yes and I stay that way through the
whole thing personally I love that yes
it's very nice it's so refreshing it's
truly actually very refreshing to not be
like bro what happened what happened to
like the kindness and the consent and
the thoughtfulness where did it go all
right so you know Vance and I love our
like trashy reality television I do know
that we've been watching Love Island
Australia season five okay okay
because there's so freaking many I'm
like there there's too many to keep up
with but we started this season and and
it's really good but part of why it's
really good is like Vance and I looked
each other and we're like the like
contestants this year I'm like these
boys are like caricatures I'm like I was
like they all think they are the main
character but in like that really like
some of them like are like openly
gaslighting their partners and like
owning it to the boy like like and one
of those things where you're like what
is happening like you're like do like in
that way when you read those characters
on a on the page and you're like okay
this is like exaggerated yeah and then
I'm like do oh is this real or like is
this how you guys actually just like
exist in the world right or is this I
hope it's just for TV yeah I was like is
this just for TV I was like because
you're
like atrocious boys you're actual
monsters yes yeah yeah like like would
we'll tell one girl to her face like I
really want to be with you you're the
only one in here for me and then we'll
like turn around and tell like the new
girls like yeah she's not my type at all
I think she's really
trashy but jokes on him apparently he's
a horrible kisser and all of the girls
have talked about it and now everyone
across several continents has talked
about it that's the come up we're
looking for I at I was like that's
that's the karmic moment I've been
waiting for yes yes oh I love that so
much I got like legit upset at like one
of the other guys for how he was like
gaslighting and manipulating his partner
I was like I'm watching the cycle of
abuse play out on
screen I
like I was like that like no good pencil
[ __ ] mother man was like
Chelsea and I was like he can't do that
to her she's too
kind that's the worst though when
they're so sweet yeah well and then
there's like sharp contrast cuz there's
like other guys who were just
legitimately that kind and wonderful
where like they were going after the
same girl and like the super shitty guy
threw the other guy under the bus and
he's like I don't trust you with anyone
but me like I don't trust you with him
and when the other dude was like what
the hell if you were into her like be
into her but like why did you have to
like go about it like that and the guy
was like oh I mean that's just like like
what Lads do right like that's just like
I'm like I like that's what your friend
group does to each other like get better
friends yes please like you know it
doesn't have to be like this right I
sometimes I think like maybe it's that
so many of like upand cominging
Generations grew up on like the real
world and like all that [ __ ] that like
maybe they do think that that's the way
that it is like big brother and like all
of that [ __ ]
Laguna Beach was
not or even like even the OC and like
Gossip Girl like life is not Gossip Girl
you guys it really isn't
XOXO absolutely
not you know exactly what I'm talking
about I I do but I got stuck on the OC
cuz I was thinking of Misha
Barton sure why wouldn't we think and
just
that wild ride that was the
OC but yeah like when you watch those
shows and you're like this is not the
real world like this is
not like this is not what we emulate our
Behavior off of and why would you want
to like why would you want to be that I
don't get it I don't get it and so
really this Kraken shifter is is
representing the best of us all he is he
is and speaking of friend groups Nora is
having my notes say bestie time um and
they she has two best friends I at least
one of them gets her own book I think
the other also does but I'm not positive
I did read the next one in the series
cuz I did enjoy this one so much but um
the besties talk to her about like all
of her fears and like he is not your ex
and you
know even if you do start dating this
Kraken cuz that's the other concern that
she has is that Elias is fairly
high-profile so if she starts dating him
her ex could potentially find her um if
but okay I might go ahead no I probably
left something out well no but she she H
she still has the same first name she's
just changed her last name
uhhuh I don't know with how powerful
they're portraying him to be it doesn't
really seem like he wouldn't able to
find her across the country if he really
wanted to right now it seemed like he
did want to but he couldn't let anybody
know that she left him like that and so
he couldn't use all the resources at his
disposal because to keep up appearances
I see okay yeah that's the way they made
it out to be but if she starts getting
photographed with Elias then you know
it's kind of all for not I also just
finished a book series where they had
like their own satellite system so they
were like we can literally do whatever
we want and spy on anyone and find
anyone so I'm probably also making it
easier in my head than it is to just
find people who try and hide obviously
yeah it's like we were just talking
about Alias earlier it's like Alias they
just get on and they're like they hit
four buttons on a keyboard and they're
like well got them they're in Taiwan
nailed it like
what
I'm like my computer doesn't even unlock
that quickly I can't log in and you have
already found the bomb my Google Chrome
crashes at least once a
week like okay
guys so anyway Nora is concerned about
all these things her friends are talking
her through all of that um but they
don't tell her what to do they're just
like talking her through her fears
supporting her and then Blair the
director of The Bureau calls and asks to
meet up with her and he tells her that
um he does know who she is like in
relation to her
ex um but he doesn't have access to
their files and she is not going to be
exposed through the government that way
um and she's like would Elias even want
to see me at this point like I really
shut him down super hard like uh I don't
know and she also has this concern she's
like well is being a mate like is he
obligated to me like does he even
actually want me or is it the whole mate
thing that is like spurring this
on and well
Nora you barely talk to the man so I
think right now it is probably an
interest in wanting to get to know the
person who is biologically mated to be
his partner forever right um correct I'm
sure you have a winning personality but
you haven't shown it yet I don't really
feel like you can say does he even want
me for me or does he just want me CU I'm
his mate and I'm
like
honestly right now primarily call him B
babe yeah like do you want do you want
the answer you want to hear or do you
want the actual answer in this scenario
yeah well and Blair is trying to explain
to her like he is going to treasure you
forever period like that's it okay I do
actually have a question that you might
not have the answer
to Is there is this one of those things
that like once you are claimed and mate
with your monster
counterpart you will then live forever
as well so we're gonna get to that
because that's actually a plot Point
okay well sorry to that's okay jump so I
feel like I do that I like ask questions
you're like Chelsea rain it end we'll
get there give me a
minute no it actually is super like it's
actually a cute moment but um then it
flashes to Elias and he's in a very
stupid business meeting and he's very
irritated to be sitting there and then
his assistant comes in um and says that
someone on his urgent list is here it's
Nora she showed up at his office and he
very readily kicks out the idiots who
are in his office he's like and we're
done here I'm very irritated with you
[ __ ] get out
um and so he's trying to play it cool
he's got very much
like I want to say golden retriever
cinnamon roll energy where he's like
don't freak her out like I can see like
a golden retriever tail like just going
but trying to be as still as possible
like don't startle her like
because he's so excited that she is like
in his
space um and she asks what would happen
if I don't agree to be your mate what
would happen and his thought this is a
direct quote his thought is um it would
be a black mark on my soul but he
doesn't tell her that because his
thought is it is not her responsibility
or her fault that she is his faded mate
and so he doesn't want her to feel
guilty or obligated and so he basically
is just
like you know i' I'd be kind of sad
like it's so endearing like he's like I
don't want her to feel like I'm
emotionally manipulating her into doing
what I
want and that's through the whole book
he very it's not just like um I'm
putting her first but really I'm getting
what what I want by putting her first
but like it's really about me it truly
does feel like it's actually about
taking care of her which is really
really sweet um So eventually she does
agree to go on a date with him but just
we're just going on a date
um and
um he is she's very sassy like as she
starts to get more comfortable with him
she's like teasing him and he's like
really thrown off like does not know
what to make of it um but decides he's
very into it and starts calling her
little siren which is like his cute
little nickname for her so I always love
I feel like that's one of
my my new newer favorite things to track
in books is like how soon they whip out
the term of endearment that's going to
be like theirs the cutesy nickname yes
like their like go-to cutesy nickname
for the rest of the book and like how
soon do do we like whip that out I've
been reading several books by one author
recently and I'm like oh I feel like she
start everyone starts getting called
Baby right around the 20% part but like
I don't hate
it I've just noticed it well it's like I
am in the middle of a series right now
but in like the
first two chapters it was like princess
immediately immediately princess what
book are you reading uh I hold
on the first one was pretty dark vows
and now I'm reading pretty wicked
Secrets is the next
one uh one of the ones that I just read
he started calling her princess like
from the jump but then you find out that
she's a literal princess oh this is not
that she's 100% a
stripper I mean not that a princess
can't be a stripper I don't want to
pigeon hole anyone but no no royalty
don't limit
yourself but I don't think that the one
in my book is actual royalty yeah no not
in this
case although I'm only like a little bit
into the second book more will be
revealed you know um well what oh I just
read a new series by well new to me I'm
not sure when it came out but another
Tate James series and I feel like Tate
James I love just how out of pocket
those books get they do because that is
the sort of thing that you will be like
three books in and then suddenly
discover someone is royalty right and
you're like the [ __ ] T James has no
issue Jumping the Shark none whatsoever
repeatedly she will come back around and
jump the same shark it's like how did we
do
that and yet I read all of them we
continue to read them cuz I just cuz at
this point I'm like I need to know I
need to know how ridiculous this one's
going to get but then I'm there for it
the whole time so I'm like I'm enjoying
them but they just get so
wild it's very much like a like an early
odd soap opera feel of like so and so
has an evil twin and is actually your
mother and it's like a whole what like
okay yes yes you get it I'm like the
number of people that fake their deaths
and come back oh yeah oh yes so many
right like a concerning amount
like like is nobody
checking like really feels like we
didn't do our due diligence before we
signed that death
certificate like who is the coroner like
get a new
one it's the coroner from eyes
[Music]
zombie yeah where she ends up eating
their brains oh no or the one from
Brooklyn 99 who's into the weird sex
stuff instead of doing the autopsy my
God I forgot about that
one while I was sick last week that's
what I watched I watched Brooklyn 99 um
I that will that is a core memory that I
will have forever of being being in
labor at the hospital with an epidural
laying on my side with like the [ __ ]
peanut ball medicine ball between my
legs watching Brooklyn 99 on a laptop
while I ate ice
chips and then when the nurse would come
in and be like we got to flip you to the
other side my husband would just move
the cart to the other side and I would
keep watching Brooklyn 99 like the
doctors had to pause it when they'd come
into check on me how did I not know
that a I love that for you nothing like
you know working on dilating well Doug
Judy and Jake Peralta are at it again
whole PB and J um okay sorry I got this
very off track there where I don't even
know oh oh he's very excited that she's
there and they agree to a date
everything's great so we're at Norah's
point of view it's date night he takes
her to the aquarium after
hours cuz he's a big donor so they like
open the Aquarium for them are Krakens
waterbased yes they're like an octopus
well that's what I thought hence the
tentacles well that's what I thought and
so he took it there to show off well it
seems like he just loves it there and is
comfortable there and just wanted to
share it with her so yeah he did with
those tentacles sorry so at the touch
pool I see I see where we got there's an
octopus yeah there's an octopus in the
touch pool and she makes a joke about
him trying to get her more comfortable
like touching sea creatures and he like
gets really flustered and he's like uh
no I don't I didn't I'm not it's not I I
didn't until he realizes that she's
joking um and she describes like all
this warmth like he's looking at her
with like all this warmth and
affection and they eat pizza in the
aquarium uh it turns out he's 300 years
old um so Pizza in the aquarium sounds
like a great [ __ ] date right I was
thinking that the whole time I was like
I want to go to an empty aquarium at
night with like all the lights and all
that stuff and then yeah have pizza yes
I want to do that 10 out of 10 yes go on
that date I'm sure it was hella
expensive but you know I think he can
afford it he can he can I can't but you
know that's not the point Nora gets to
enjoy it and I get to vicariously so um
a lot of aquariums do have night
Adventures they do and like sleepover
packages I don't know they I would want
to sleepover I did one as a child like
it was like our
like youth group girls thing where we
would go and we would sleep with the man
manes I love manatees so it was you'd
like bring your own like air mattress
and sleeping bag but then you just slept
by their tent or not not their tent
their tent their tank their tank yeah
and we weren't in tents because we were
inside but it was super cool to wake up
and be like there's manatees there's
some manatees just vibing right next to
us I feel like that's all manatees do is
just
Vibe they are professional viers
essentially yeah yeah
and especially growing up in Florida oh
yeah we had lot of them so many mines
yeah they're so funny looking they are
so funny looking and I my sister my
older sister used to take me to like
feed them you you just give them cabbage
leaves they just sort of snuffle at your
hand it's so cute yeah they're
perfect no
notes like can confirm and that's it
there were no manatees mentioned at the
aquarium that they are at on their date
well for being such a good
donor why aren't we protecting more
manatees you get it um although I guess
we did grow they're in Seattle right
right and so like we're like manity
people we grew up in Florida we're like
oh on the complete opposite side I don't
are there manties on that side I don't
know enough about their migration
patterns do they have migration patterns
I don't know I'm sorry there aren't
manatees there I'm getting
very mant up in the manatees manatees
are important just not to the story um
so oh my God I'm about to go on a whole
different tangent okay I need to come
back I'm coming back so he's three years
old three years old 300 years old um
and she is kind of like frustrated with
herself because every opening he gives
her to talk about herself like every
question he asks um she turns it back on
him or she kind of deflects in some way
um
and she's basically like I am really
like not on your level like I am not
worth your time I don't know why we're
doing this right now it feels really
weird um because he obviously cares for
her very deeply like automatically and
she's like I don't get it why are you so
into me right you have your [ __ ]
together you've had 300 years to get
your [ __ ] together yeah and it's not
like a low self-esteem thing either it
feels more like a like a realistic what
are we what what are you doing bud like
are you sure okay um so like more of a
how will this work yeah un less of like
a how could he be into me
I don't even have a savings account
right and more of like the I'm just so
dumpy how could he ever want me like n
it's not like that it's more like
a like practically how is this going to
work yeah it's like we lead very
different lives yeah huh okay and so he
says that he really just wants the
chance to get to know her and for her to
get to know him and he's like I will do
whatever it takes to make you happy like
however whatever Pace you want to go at
what however you want it to look I am on
board um so she is super confused by
that she's like what do you mean you're
you're going to do what I want how I
want it I don't get
it but I'll I'll try I guess I don't get
it so back to Elias he
is kind of beating himself up for
letting things get so heavy at dinner um
he just wants her to be comfortable um
and he is really fighting his instincts
to give her space so like that more
evolved side of him recognizes that
following her around and like being up
her ass all the time is not going to
help anything at all um
so uh great Insight stocking doesn't
work right correct
yes please ignore all of Haunting
Adeline you know it it doesn't work so
he asked to drive her home because she
had taken the bus um and she agrees but
says she needs a picture of his driver's
license which I really
appreciated um she sends it in her group
chat to her besties she's like here you
go guys just in case and he's like that
makes me really sad like he's not
offended he's just like it's really sad
that women have to do that like that
really sucks but I'm also really glad
that she's careful that's good
like I did you see that thread that like
it was a tweet that was getting shared a
while ago um but they were talking about
man how Wild are women's text threads
where it's like hey besties sharing my
location for my date tonight so I don't
get murdered and the friend like good
luck you're going to kill it yeah like
and yet it's it's so normalized that
we're sitting there like hey just if you
don't hear from me by 11:00 send police
yeah for real it's like fit check also
here's my location if you don't hear
from me by such and such time and
they're like oh my God bestie you look
super hot and we will have 911 on
standby like which shoes should I wear
and this I am sharing my location for
the next 24 hours right and they're like
which one has better traction so you can
run just in case like what fresh hell
like oh my
God
valid yeah okay valid concerns on valid
concerns so he is totally fine again
just doing whatever she needs to feel
safe
um so when they get to her apartment he
tells her that he does know a little bit
about her ex and he she explains that he
had been looking for her and that uh
things really did not end well between
them um and uh but she doesn't elaborate
at all so he's you know curiosity is
peaked so uh they agree to a second date
um they kiss at the at her door it's
amazing um and that's sweet obviously
it's super cute and then we're back with
Nora she's like taken off guard by how
amazing the kiss is I'm just going to
say and maybe I'm about to eat my words
here are they about to [ __ ] in like 5
Seconds no okay cuz that's what I was
that say I appreciate I'm like oh like
it it's been a a slow buildup to get to
the first kiss and I feel like some
books are just like okay well we we made
it to the kiss so now his fingers will
be inside her and you're like wait
what how did that she was like I don't
even know that I want him to drive me
home like
yeah let's get naked I and so I
appreciate the the consistency in that
capacity and it is actually Elias who
pulls back like things do start to
escalate a little bit but he pulls back
and um he tells her that he is not going
to go too fast um because she is worth
the weight like she's important enough
that they need to get to know each other
and he's not going to [ __ ] this
up so it's 5 days later Nora is at work
she has been texting Elias every day um
and daydreaming about him pretty
constantly um she is alone in the
bookstore where she works and she sees a
man past the window who looks just like
her ex oh no and she starts to freak out
so she calls Elias um and it turns out
he is out of the country he's in Canada
um and he says not to panic that he's
sending somebody to her like lock the
door doors turn the lights out don't
move until the person I send for you
shows up um and he asks why why did you
call me and she said because she knew
that he would be there for her that she
could count on him um a and uh she is
like I know I did this on purpose like I
called him for help on purpose but now I
don't know how to accept it she's like
wants to argue with him about it and
then she's like
but the whole
reason and so she's having this like
dialogue with herself about like can you
get your [ __ ] together right now like
come
on so but that is like the most human
yes
like
especially being a two on the
inag I have realized over the years and
like with really like working through it
and processing I'm like oh man
I'm not good at like identifying what I
need to then be able to communicate what
I'm like one I know I don't want to
inconvenience anyone anyway right oh
yeah never ever but then I'm like I have
a difficult time even identifying what I
need to be able to communicate it that
is what marriage taught
me like my husband being like I'm
literally here I am here to help tell me
what you need what do you need and I'm
like I don't [ __ ] know like why don't
you know
just like read my mind that I can't read
and just tell me what I
need exactly yeah so she's having a
special I know I need help I know I need
assistance I cannot articulate what that
is or what I want it to look like even
when I know I need it and then she's
like this is this is a smart idea I
don't want to accept this help she's
like what the [ __ ] is wrong with me
right now
so we flash to Elias and he is flipping
out trying to get back to her and it
turns out that the ex whose name is
Daniel is in Seattle um to meet with
Blair at the bureau because of all the
Congress whatever so um so it was indeed
him yes it was him and but he doesn't
know that his ex is in Seattle as far as
we know so as far as we know it was it
purely coincidence that he happened to
walk past the store right total fluke
situation um but Elias feels guilty that
maybe like he put Nora back on Daniel's
radar somehow um and so he gets back to
his house and um his staff his like
housekeeper um got Norah all set up and
with a room and toiletries and clothes
and everything she could need uh and he
tries to just go to bed but he decides
to check on her um cuz he just he like
just needs to see her to like confirm
that she's okay um well especially if he
rushed all the way back from Canada he
did Rush all the way back from Canada
which I don't think is actually that far
from Seattle I don't know where in
Canada he was it's a large place but it
seems he got back pretty quickly
probably not in Manitoba probably not I
don't I don't know why he would be in
Manitoba he wasn't that far east no no
um Manitoba is East right I don't know I
just read a book where they accidentally
went to Manitoba well not accidentally
they went to Manitoba but they didn't
mean to they meant to go to Glen Lily
which I guess is near Manitoba okay I do
feel better Manitoba is where I thought
it was which is above North
Dakota
okay I'll take your word for it this is
American public school systems at work
one of my dearest friends is from
Winnipeg like we've been good friends
for uh since before Obama was in office
and so I'm like feeling a little guilty
in this
moment you don't more cuz I initially I
was like Manitoba I know where it is and
then I was like [ __ ] maybe do I then I
looked I was like oh I do okay it is
where I thought but now I feel guilty
that I should have just had more
confidence in it yeah yeah no I have
nothing for for Canada except for
watching letter Kenny which I don't
think is the
same and the great news is my friend
owns a coffee shop and has a family and
has his own life and is not the Target
demographic for the show so he will
never need he will never need to know he
will never be offended by it sorry
Chad Okay so so sorry Chad so sorry so
after when Elias goes to check on her uh
of course they make out and she
apologizes for interrupting his trip and
he's like never apologize you know that
whole moment um that whole moment and
I'm like I do know that whole you know
exactly what I'm talking about um and so
then they make out some more and she
asked him to stay with her and um he's
trying to be cool again but again I get
like the vibrating
puppy situation cuz he is so excited
that she has asked this of him he
doesn't have any expectations about
what's going to happen he's just excited
to be near her he just wants to bask in
her presence 100% he's just like H also
I said bask in her presence and then in
my head I went in The Nearness of the
Lord I'm like tell me you grew up
the Conservative Christian S without
telling me you cow the Conservative
Christian
no oh my God surrounded by Your
glory
no I'm sorry to ruin their sweet moment
well with my third day
references like 15% of our audience is
going to understand that but for the
ones who do that joke will slap because
the the the manate tangent I almost win
on was very much Veggie Tales related
so okay I desperately need to hear about
that later cuz I I need to know how
manatees and Veggie Tails go hand in
hand but to keep us on track to keep us
on track we are back to Nora we're not
even drinking right now we're not even
drinking today you guys this is good
this is good so we're back to Nora it's
the next morning she wakes up with Elias
and
um she kind of has this moment where the
adrenaline is gone from all of it and
she realizes like he showed up with no
expectation from her like he helped her
he took care of her and she's like
that's really weird and he like didn't
push anything physical with her he just
literally laid down she does not know
what to do with him being a good guy
yeah she's like H I don't trust it she's
like uhuh you know I'm not going to lie
and I know that there's tentacle stuff
we're going to get to but I feel like
when you hear the title nor is cracken
you're
like salacious we're expecting darker
things yes which is why the
wholesomeness of this like took me off
guard and I was like oh that's nice
you know exactly what I'm talking about
you really do um so then he finally
wakes up again they start making out
again and she asks if he would be more
comfortable shifted like partially
shifted um partially yes so he can shift
just his lower
half okay there it is the way your eyes
just lit up that's it yeah
um and he's like like a school girl yeah
he's like do do you want me to shift
like is that what you want and she has
been watching some crack and porn and
she might be into it but um she's not
ready and so he tells her that it
doesn't matter anyway and this is all
about her and goes down on
her um and she is is feeling him up
after he's like in the traditional sense
he went down on her right yes I just
know tentacles are I just need there are
no tentacles yet I just like we're not
to
tentacles we haven't made it to the
tentacles the slowburn continues like
they're we're working up to it so can we
get that on Shir we haven't made it to
the tentacles yet we're working up to
the
tentacles
oh I would wear that shirt
okay I
know okay so um he's like obviously
super into it he's just really excited
that he gets to touch her at all and
she's feeling him up afterwards and some
of his skin has shifted a little bit and
she can feel it and he starts
apologizing cuz he's
like um like you didn't want me to shift
and I didn't mean to and she has no
issue with it and just goes back to
cuddling him she's like it's no big deal
and they just cuddle okay yeah um and
Elias is in his head that maybe she
won't accept him
shifted um but he also is just really
thankful and excited to be with her and
he like well if she's my mate and she's
not into it then I'm not into it either
no
problem which like is is sweet on one
hand and sad yeah and also
like I don't want you to have to deny
the parts of you that make you you a
liot yeah don't deny your tentacles bud
so um he's just like also
recognizing they've been on one date and
he needs to not be freaking out the way
that he is so
um they eat breakfast
together again he's just has so much
gratitude that she let him take care of
her um and he decides he's going to take
some days off of work to just hang out
with her um so they go hiking um what
and I may have missed this earlier if
you could refresh my memory what does
she do she works in a
bookstore holy [ __ ] balls I deaf knew
that I think for I think why I like I
paused was I'm like is she just not
working is she just like hiding out
until her ex leaves Seattle I think
that's why I po that's why I stopped I
was like wait I was like doesn't she
doesn't she work I was like does she
have a job why isn't she working that's
why I asked that but as soon as you said
bookstore I'm like oh damn Chelsea that
is not your best
moment I think like she only she doesn't
work a ton of shifts like it it felt
like not part-time but like four days a
week kind of deal okay um so they go
hiking um he takes her out of Seattle
and she is able to relax more knowing
that Daniel's like not just going to pop
up um um so they talk about his history
um
and he tells her that he was a pirate
with Blair back in the day um and he
would capture ships in his Kraken form
which tells you how big he is fully
shifted he's pretty massive oh um and
they stopped when
Blair's woman died um he was pretty sure
that she was his mate um and you only
get one and so there's a lot of guilt
that Elias feels because he feels like
he should have prevented her from dying
um and he's like oh I'm really sorry I
just brought down the mood so sorry um
is that misplaced guilt it seems that
way it seems like it really wasn't
anybody's fault like it was just an
accident um but
still feels horrible because it very
nearly killed Blair um to lose her that
way so uh Nora's like hey I I wanted to
know about you like thank you for
sharing with me you know you're not
bringing anything down um and so then uh
he drives her home she's like I can't
just stay with you we've been on one
date well two dates now I guess guess
like come on buddy and he's like
fine so
um again are you sure my house has
plenty of room so much room welcome to
stay so much space um so he he does
really want her to stay but he is you
know respectful of her boundaries yes
and
so he drives her home um and as they get
to her
she like freezes up and there is a note
from her ex on her door um and my notes
say Panic stations Elias checks the
apartment and holds her while she freaks
out so he then offers to pay for a hotel
for her or for her to use his condo in
the city instead of coming back to his
house since she didn't want to stay with
him he doesn't want to use that as like
a he's like you don't have to stay with
me I'm happy to provide you other
options that will still make you feel
safe also real quick question
MH is her ex all human yes okay yeah so
um she does eventually ask to stay with
him so um on the ride back to his house
Nora explains that Daniel used to leave
her notes all the time um he was very
emotionally and financially abusive um
and eventually became physically abusive
and that's why she left and so um he was
constantly criticizing and controlling
her
um and Elias is like at a loss of what
to do to help her um he's really angry
and he's like well I'm definitely going
to ruin Daniel's life that's an easy
decision but like how do I help Nora in
this moment like what how do I how is
she going to be okay he's like I
obviously have the resources to destroy
that man and I will and yeah and I'm
going to don't you worry he's like but
in the moment what does Norah need right
um which I respect that he's like I'm
going to do that and this moment is not
the time to put that plan into action
right because his true priorities are
her and like her well-being mhm so she
tells him that she wants a shower and
when he goes to leave her in the guest
room um she starts making out with him
and he goes to pull back because he's
like I'm not you're clearly emotional
like you're clearly upset and I am not
going to take advantage of you that way
and she is like jokes on you I was
planning to invite you into my apartment
anyway and Daniel is not taking this
from me so get in the [ __ ] shower
she's like this is happening so let me
suck your dick exactly your T your let
me suck your tentacles mating tentacle
you're mating you're mating tentacle
mating
tentacle is there a main tentacle
usually or is that just with shifters
they have one specific one that allows
them I don't know enough about I
seapods you knew enough to call them
seapods listen the confidence with which
I did that is the same confidence that
you had talking about where Manitoba is
it's enough to be pretty sure but not
enough to know for sure for
sure it's enough to say it with with
confidence until the first time someone
fact checks
100% yeah okay yeah it's enough until
somebody in the comments is like you are
the dumbest person on the planet like
aop pod is a [ __ ] spider or something
we're going to need it like a
Corrections Corner in the future corre
corner just that real fast like hey guys
so Chelsea does know what a [ __ ] is I
knew
it that too she does know the word
cingus don't you worry
all right but also please let us know if
we're making egregious errors yeah
please do we're not saying don't correct
us we are open to learning we are very
aware that we do not have all the
knowledge I'm not a marine biologist I
am going to look up seop pods while you
Contin pleas so
um they get naked she asked him to shift
and he says that she has to come on his
mouth first um and this is a direct
quote um then she can have his tentacles
if she's a good
girl so we're getting there now yeah
so um 10 out of 10 seapod does include
OCT
octopus I was almost
Vindicated
uh and
cuddlefish so I'm not going to try and
pluralize it and we're just going to
continue we're just going to continue
we're just going to pretend that Happ
well I'm I'm really glad that you did
but also I forgot I put this in my notes
it says he goes clam diving and then
does a partial
shift I'm so
sorry um
a con and we consented to the shift she
is in water right she did ask him to
shift and he said
yes but it is a partial shift I I have
logistical questions that don't matter
keep going okay so he said maybe they do
matter but I don't know if I want the
answer totally fair um so he says that
um he'll do a full shift for her in the
ocean
but it's not exactly sexy to have an
entire sea monster in your shower that
honestly helped answer some of my my
Quant I thought it might I thought it
might um so tentacles are doing a lot of
stuff
um yeah they are yeah and she starts
feeling him up back the ma The Mating
tentacle and
um he
is she's clearly into it and he is also
like not wanting to push her too far
like not wanting her to do anything that
makes her uncomfortable does he have a
normal penis when he's in his human form
he does yeah okay yeah um I wasn't sure
if he was just built like a kend doall
until he shifted I really forgot I did
this in my notes so then it says she
decides to get a taste of the
sea so sorry I love when you have like
had a drink or two and you decide that's
when to do your outline because the look
on your face as you read your outline
back to yourself and you're like Hannah
damn it did you really put that
why because I outlined this so long ago
too and I read my notes I guess I just
skimmed um anyway so Elias is shocked
that she wants to do this um and he
is thinking about xxs question mark
um
apparently I I don't know how any of it
works and it's never explained but he's
thinking about how he can't get her
pregnant until he intentionally secretes
egg sax he's thinking about this while
she is blowing him so I don't know my
notes literally say I have questions and
there are no
answers and you know I mean is this
we're gonna is this the part of the book
where we're going to stop suspending
bu yeah we we could just Overlook so
many things until we got to the egg sack
the egg sack really was the moment where
I was like well
what
so he gets her off with a
tentacle they go back to bed
um and
he after they have like their nice
cuddle time um he's telling her that he
thinks that she should go to the cops
and she's like to do what he left a note
on my door that wasn't even a threat in
the note like what are they going to do
um but she does eventually agree to talk
to Blair about it
um
and
uh so they sleep together not have sex
but they go to bed and when they wake up
um he tells her that he doesn't want to
rush anything that he wants a quote
unquote normal Pace
um and um she's pushing back against
that a little bit but he tells her that
um the best moments they've had so far
have been the normal ones have been
going to the aquarium having breakfast
together the beach all that stuff um and
so she agrees to spend the weekend with
him so um Elias is trying to figure out
where Daniel is if he's still in Seattle
it turns out he is not he's in Canada
apparently he is meeting with the
Canadian government to try to make it
more difficult for paranormals to get
visas and stuff like he's actively
working against the Paranormal
Community uh um and Blair doesn't know
if the leak about Nora came from his
office and he's pretty pissed about it
because how did Daniel find her address
and stuff and so he is like locking
everything down and he's like pretty
pretty big mad about the whole thing um
which feels like the correct level of
response yes it's very much like it's
not only about his best friend's mate
being in danger but it's also
all the other people like all of the
other paranormals and all of the other
mates and his employees who are both
paranormal and human he's like yeah
we're not we're shutting this
down so um Nora is really just honestly
living her life and having a pretty good
time with her friends she decides that
she maybe wants to go back to school cuz
Daniel forced her to drop out previously
so she's starts researching maybe going
back um Elias still has security with
her um and there's some really cute
moments where she's like bonding with
his staff um cuz the the One Security
guy is super Gruff and like doesn't
really talk to her um but she makes him
some banana bread as like a thank you
for for watching out for her thanks for
keeping me alive here's some banana
bread
like and the guy like really softens to
her her and you know Elias is very much
enjoying that his staff is loving her
I'm not going to lie I do always that is
something that I always enjoy is like
the relationship that like the girl
develops with the driver or the security
guard or just like the sweet the grounds
keeper yes that's very much like a I
don't know like a warm uncle or like a I
don't know how to describe the dynamic
but it's like just really kind and sweet
yeah and like I think like familial at
some level depending on the age of the
person yeah but like it's just always
like oh here's just like a safe person
in my corner yeah yeah yeah so because
throughout the book this guy had been
around and clearly just like not he's
very shut down and
professional and she's like I'm going to
crack him I'm going to get him going to
crack him like a kraken hey hey you get
it um
so back except he's not her her mate so
she
wouldn't she wouldn't no that would be a
big issue um
so that's the book tape James writes
instead every time damn it Tate um so
Elias is home and probably in this the
shower so
she is kind of thinking about her own
childhood um going through some stuff
that she had picked up from her
apartment like her mom was always
depressed and pretty neglectful and her
dad wasn't around and she's just like
thinking about it and kind of down and
so she decides to go look for Elias so
she calls out to him he doesn't answer
so she just goes into his room and
there's a huge like indoor outdoor
saltwater pool in his bedroom and she SE
SE tentacles on the side and realizes he
must be in the water and so she touches
one of his tentacles and it like snaps
out and pulls her into the
water so we go to Elias's point of view
and he immediately half shifts to like
prevent from like actually pulling her
under um and she's like it's cool I
would like a I would like a swim to ease
the stress of the day and just gets
naked um okay and um he's in his head
he's like we're taking it slow we're
taking it slow I'm not scaring her away
this is my M this is important it's not
at all there's a lot of tentacles
there's so many tentacles
so are there more than eight I don't
know I didn't count and I don't think
Nora did
either I'm just gonna how many tentacles
does a kraken have how many yeah
tentacles
do a kraken half 10 10 okay okay
wait yeah this one says the Kraken has
10 okay I wonder if that includes the
mating tentacle but then another one
says up to
eight so so we get to choose how many
tentacles we have choose your own
tentacle Adventure um now what I rating
scales yep hey woo
so he is also kind of concerned that now
that she's kind of like in his domain
that he's not going to let her leave cuz
he's so excited that she's there um so
um he again he's eating her out lots of
tentacle use restraining there's a
sucker on the
G-Spot there's a whole lot happening um
and he is like how much do you want and
she is like all of it all all of all of
the things I want all of it um she said
I want the whole tentacle experience yep
and you know in his head he's like I
will do whatever she wants whatever
makes her comfortable like whatever and
she's like yeah [ __ ] that let's do it um
so um he he's he's still trying to take
it slow and she's like I have now made
up my mind she's like let's hit the gas
get on board okay so um he just is
continuously checking in with her to
make sure that she's still with him that
she's still good
um and
um yeah there's so much so many
tentacles so she starts to get nervous
that she's not going to be able that
he's not going to fit like his mating
tentacle isn't going to fit um and he is
super sweet and
encouraging and um he's just
continuously like she comes again and
he's like
are you are you done are you good and
she's like nope still want more and he's
like okie dokie
like um finally [ __ ] her for real
um so he's just yeah he's just going for
it he was trying to hold back and she
wasn't having it I think my my favorite
part of this right now is just watching
you try to figure out how many details
to give her withhold about the tentacles
that's literally what's happening I'm
like I don't need to share
that like I can I can see it on your
face you're like I wrote it out nope not
going to say that's the quiet part that
does not get said out
loud you know who did say it out loud
[ __ ] Lee Miller so if you want all
the details please go read it you're
curious about the logistics of tentacle
sex
mhm Hannah is not the one to give them
to you no I can make recommendations for
people who could give you better
information than me so is the word
seapod used in the book you know I don't
know I don't know I don't remember but
um we are back to Elias's point of view
he explains mating to her um like that
she won't get pregnant unless he gives
her an egg um and yeah it's still never
explained he's like I don't really know
how it works either I don't
know um and he's like you know we don't
have to worry about it until you decide
you want to have babies really like we
don't have to do it and um she he tells
her so this is where the lifespan thing
comes in okay he tells her that she will
have an extended
lifespan um and she gets upset because
the way that it works is like their
lifespans meet in the middle so
basically she gets his life is going to
be shorter so that hers can be longer
and so she gets upset um that like he
his life is going to be shorter and he's
like you don't get it like I'm just
really happy that you're here it's like
I won't have a life without you so it's
okay this is it for me forever um so
um the next few days together they are
going to work they're banging it out
quite often um finding their
rhythms not how I meant that but exactly
how you meant it know honest to God I
like started it and I was like [ __ ] just
commit and you did I did
yes um they are spending time together
so you know they're having a good time
um there Daniel is still in Canada
trying to get laws about the Paranormal
Community changed up there um still
being a douche canoe still being a
pretty big douche
um he's they're just like bonding and
meeting each other's friends and that
kind of finding their rhythms yes the
early relationship stuff all the good
stuff and so um
cuz I mean I do I do feel like once you
[ __ ] the tentacles that is a solidifying
[ __ ] if there was one and
then um Elias again takes her to the
pool and he puts a tentacle in her ass
while he [ __ ] her and she's into it so
that is if the first one wasn't a
solidifying [ __ ] this one was you know
um you don't even need a herum when you
have that many tentacles no you don't
man no you don't and it's just he's so
sweet like he's just so attentive and
taking care of her and like really good
after care and stuff and
um he can feel so he's thinking about it
the next day he can feel the mate bond
in his chest and he wants to like tug on
it to make sure she's okay but he's like
that's kind of
intrusive I need to leave her
alone so um
they bang on his desk at some
point um she shows up to have lunch with
him at at work and he [ __ ] her on his
desk of course um and then um Blair
shows up and Daniel's back in DC still
not a threat to her okay and um Elias is
like oh she really doesn't need to stay
with me if I see he's back in DC see
he's
like so he just asks her what she needs
instead of saying like are you going to
go back to your apartment or whatever
he's just like what do you need how can
I support you so she decides it's too
insane for him to just for her to just
move in with him so she goes back to um
her
apartment and she doesn't want all the
security and she's like gearing up to
have an argument with him and he's like
okay that's totally okay I understand
but I would like to put a security
system on your apartment and she's like
okay and totally avoid a very valid
compromise yeah totally avoiding any
kind of concern there's lots of talk
about they they're banging again um
because once they start they just go I
literally was just thinking that I like
it feels like like once the floodgates
opened on the tentacles
it yes that's exactly correct and um she
while they're banging she's like can you
shift without water and he's like have I
spoiled you with my crack and [ __ ]
little siren it's like God Bless
America
um anyway um he tells her that he
doesn't want anything to change that he
wants to be with her as much as she's
willing um and his home is always open
to her anytime um and she is not still
not willing to move in with him but
she's very grateful for his support So
then again over the next week or so they
settle into a routine of seeing each
other most nights um and Nora is working
to close so a little later than usual
and she's walking to the bus
stop and um Daniel shows up out of
nowhere I was waiting yeah he's here we
knew he was going to stay in DC Forever
nope he's here um and we go to then
Elias's point of view and he doesn't
feel right he's like something's not
right but I don't know what it
is um like feeling her ones through his
mate Bond honestly just that like gut
right and they haven't fully mated yet
so it's like just the like inklings of
it um but he's also tendrils tend too
close to
tentacles um but it's also cold and dark
and Nora is walking to the bus stop
alone and so he's trying to convince
himself not to call her like a crazy
person and then he's like no that's
that's okay like I'm allowed to call her
to check in so he calls no answer and
he's like maybe she's on the phone or
maybe she's working later than she
thought it's all good no need to panic
so then he calls again a few minutes
later and still no answer and that bad
feeling just gets worse and he's like
[ __ ] it I'm just going to go check on
her
so we're back to Norah's point of view
she is trying to tell Daniel that
there's nothing for them to talk about
she's just trying to walk away from him
but he grabs her arm and flashes a gun
and is like we're going to go get a
drink okay she's like okie dokie like
here we
go um and she realizes that she made the
wrong choice like to walk with him at
all and so um you never go to a never go
to a secondary location you never go to
a secondary location he destroys her
phone when he uh hears it ringing mhm
and then he does pull her into a bar um
and then back to Elias he can't find her
so he calls Blair um and he Taps into
the mating Bond while he's waiting for
Blair to figure out what's going
on and uh he feels that going to her
apartment is the wrong direction and so
he tries to like like follow the mate
Bond um Daniel
is a dick and he's really trying to just
intimidate
her um but um she doesn't really feel
intimidated but he does have a gun and
she's like yeah he is insane enough to
use it and potentially hurt other people
too so she just tries to play along um
he's trying to get in her head um
about you know I heard you have a mate
do you really think he's coming for you
like kind of mocking her kind of thing
and um I mean is his plan to kill her or
get her back well that's the really
confusing part I don't think he knows
because she reaches for the bond in her
chest and um that she can feel in her
chest and
um so she's also tugging back she
doesn't know like what it is really or
if it's going to work but she's she's
tugging back and he tells her Daniel
tells her they're going back to DC and
he has a plane waiting and starts
dragging her out of the bar and she
realizes that if he gets in the car it's
game over like if he doesn't outright
kill her he takes her to a third
location right if we go to a third
location we're really Fu guys I really
think the Third location is bad news
third one is the problem way to trust
your gut
Nora so um she is freaking out that
maybe he's going to kill her so she
starts struggling and then um she hears
Elias my notes say big
mad um he distracts Daniel um long
enough to get him to let her go and he
starts waving the gun around and um
Blair shows up up and it turns out Blair
is a dragon so Blair shows up in Dragon
form and it very quickly deals with
Daniel not an
issue Daniel's gun may have been
intimidating right till a dragon the
dragon showed up and Daniel very quickly
realized he ain't [ __ ] right you bought
a brought a gun to a dragon fight like
no no no kiddo so um Elias like sweeps
Norah up and his instincts are telling
him to go [ __ ] up Daniel to like really
just lay into him but Nora is his
priority and so he takes care of her
first so um she's got bruises all over
her um and he's just doing his best to
take care of her and um as she's calming
down the cops show up um to question
her Elias tries to get them to leave her
alone but Nora is like this is I just
need to get this over with yeah I just
need to get it done so Elias waits for
her at the police station and he is just
panicking um and you know doesn't know
if she's okay or what's going on
um and then finally he's like she
finally comes out and he's just like
holding her and then he's like can I can
I drive you home cuz he's worried that
like she blames him for Daniel finding
her and he's like maybe this undid all
the progress that we made um I while I
have thoroughly enjoyed him this whole
book I do feel like we've made it to a
point where I'm like I need you to lean
into it a little bit more yeah like
believe in the me that believes in you
my guy yeah cuz she's like what are you
talking about and he's like well you
wanted you wanted space and I didn't
want to just like assume you wanted to
come back to my place um and she's like
no we're we're going to go back to your
place and we're going to talk and he's
like [ __ ] like this isn't going to be a
good talk Elias it's G to be fine my my
guy it is going to be fine so
um yeah he's trying to control his
Kracken instincts of course to like you
know hold her close and never let her go
and
um she is feeling more of his emotions
now that she's touched the bond so she
can feel how guilty he is
um and so they have a talk about where
they are in their relationship and she
says um she's still not ready to just
move in like we're still going to take
things at a more normal Pace but like I
want to be with you like this doesn't
change anything
um but she's like my lease is up in a
couple of months we can talk about it
then and
um yeah and he's like that sounds great
I love that for us let's do it they take
a bath
together um wait that's the end of the
book just about so he's super excited he
declares his love she
reciprocates and then tentacles yes Nora
eight months
later oh they're doing a role play and
she is in a rowboat in the sound and
Elias is somewhere stalking her in the
sound in his fully shifted Kraken and he
finally shows himself and drags her boat
to a cave and then he destroys the boat
and she calls out to him and declares
that he is her mate um and he half
shifts and comes for her this is their
official mating um so he lays his claim
my notes say DP with
tentacles she's back in
school what Daniel is going to
trial they live together happily ever
after that's what my notes
say we never got more details about the
egg sack we never got more never got
more details about the egg sack but she
yeah that's it so they I guess they just
dated like normal people for eight
months and then she was like let's do it
and then they made it and that's it
that's the
end I love that they didn't make
like immediately yeah I really
appreciate the more
realistic
Pace mhm instead of just
like seeing them one time like yeah
being like I saw you across the bar and
now you're mine
forever who cares if you don't want to
be right I I didn't ask you I called
dibs and here we are yeah um so yeah
that's
it I enjoyed
that is your camera open yeah I don't
know how I did that I didn't notice
until you just said something I just L
down like wait what it's it's done now
I'll just flip it
over that as I you know as I said
earlier the title Norris Kraken
yeah really expected it to be a little
darker mhm
was it was more of like a a cozy read
than I anticipated it was it like I said
it was wholesome in a weird
way and as as wholesome as DP tentacles
can
be yeah I heard it as I said it it was
too late um but you know exactly what I
mean though like their relationship
Dynamic was more wholesome than I
expected um one 1,000% and it was a nice
like change up from the usual faded mate
where it's like immediately together he
doesn't give a [ __ ] about what she
thinks or wants and it's just like
you're my mate sucks to suck she'll come
around right no it was very much like
literally truly she is the priority
whatever she needs um and I really
appreciated that yeah so how many
tentacles are you rating it well I'm
going to go out of 10 since that was our
first assumption or that the first
answer I found on the internet before I
found several other answers that told me
that might not be the correct answer but
for the sake of needing to to have a
number to rate I'm still going to go
with seven or seven I'm going to go with
10 I think I'm I was thinking of giving
it seven
mhm because yeah it was nice like it was
a nice read I listen C's get degrees 70%
yeah and I did read the next one and I
enjoyed it um yeah were there tentacles
in the next one no it was about Blair so
it was a
dragon yeah it was a
dragon fire
breathing you can't tell me the sex got
normal no no I don't
remember I don't remember if there was
fire breathing in the sex
Hannah I don't care if there's actual
fire breathing I just need to know what
made the sex the sex with the dragon I
really don't remember I really don't
remember it's easy with a kraken it's
like obviously it's going to be tentacle
[ __ ] but like with a dragon it's harder
to
know it's harder to know what the weird
thing is going to be yeah well I guess
if you too would like to know what the
weird dragon sex is in the second
one yeah check it out check it out
report back
mhh but yeah I'm comfortable with a
seven out of 10 it was a unique take on
a faded mate and it was a a nice warm
comfy story with
tentacles it's just a good Comfort read
with tentacles yeah if that's what
you're into more power to you
with
tentacle just start adding it to
everything now like in bed on a a
fortune cookie yeah my day was really
good with tentacles and emails hey
dinner with
tentacles there's a lot of intrigue
there it does open up more
conversation really fixated on the
dragon sex now and it's not even the
book we read okay so seven out of 10
tentacles um let us know how many
tentacles you would rate this if if your
Kraken does not have 10 and has like
seven or eight there were varied numbers
sure one said up to eight right um and
we also don't know if that includes the
mating
tentacle touche
yeah so give us your thoughts do we have
any marine
biologists who can who are experts in
Kracken did you ever ride that roller
coaster at SeaWorld oh yeah oh yeah I so
we took a middle school field trip that
was like our seventh grade field trip I
rode Kraken seven times in a row without
getting off yep like did not even it was
like a Tuesday school trip right like
there was no one in line you did not
even have to get off to get back in the
line you could just stay buckled in yep
that was also my first migraine I
imagine it was it was not
a it was fun but like seven times in a
row yeah uh definitely leaves your neck
a little jostled a little bit although
any roller coaster seven times in a row
yeah is probably going to leave some to
be desired yeah but on that note let us
know how many tentacles you would rate
this let us know if you've ridden the
roller coaster at SeaWorld yeah you know
let us know your thoughts on manatees oh
[ __ ] yeah manatees [ __ ] yeah manatees
and on that note goodbye smls see you
next
time well that's it for this week's muts
[ __ ] we hope it was good for you cuz it
sure was great for us if you're digging
what we're doing it would mean a lot if
you'd take a minute to rate and review
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now maybe tell that sexy someone to lend
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[Music]
smudy